Elysium
by Scribhneoir45
Summary: Previously titled 'You're Beautiful'. Sephiroth, weary and afflicted with his life, believes his one chance at peace comes in the form of a blond boy with blue eyes. One man's obsession will destroy or alter the lives of everyone involved.
1. Introduction!

**Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

* * *

Have you ever sat at a bar or a restaurant or a park and just looked around at the people there? Have you ever spent a long time staring at one person in particulr for some reason? Have you ever thought about the fact that this stranger will never know you were looking at them, and thinking about them and that a moment of your life was compleatly dedicated to them? If you have, then have you ever thought about the fact that a stranger could be looking at you and thinking about you, but you would never know.

One person can affect the life of another person in some way without ever knowing it. That is how humanity works, but what if there was someone out there who built there dreams around you, who saw you as their reason for living and wanted you to know?

What would happen then?

* * *

**This is going to be a dark, dark story. Rape, abuse, murder, molestation, upsetting themes, sex, yaoi. You name it. I Dont want to be reported so if you are sensitive to disturbing themes then Dont read this. If you re going to read then...Enjoy!**


	2. II

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any other Square Enix characters.**

* * *

_"Sephiroth, I love you."_

_Green eyes flew open. He didn't move or blink, he didn't even sigh. He just laid there between his sweat covered sheets on the bed, staring into the darkness which still covered the spacious and eloquent bedroom. _

_He lay there for a for a while, trying to adjust himself back to reality fully, before he brought a hand up to rub his temples and allowed a loud growl to escape from between his lips. That dream again. He yanked the covers from his body and with an inhuman agility, lunged from the bed and paced across his room to the large window covering most of the front wall. His nude body seemed to glow in the moonlight which shone through the glass, he never slept in clothes. Man was born with only his flesh after all._

_That's the eight night in a row._

_He gazed dreamily at the view of the streets of Midgar below him. He looked at the people walking along, mostly party goers and prostitutes at this hour, and narrowed his eyes in disgust._

_Ever since he was a child he had always found himself repulsed by the people around him, he found them decedent and weak and often wished for them to be punished. He had feared these thoughts being brought to the surface, and had worked to hide them from both the world, and himself to an extent. This was something he did quite well and somewhere along the line he had even managed to find two people he truly cared for and could even say he loved: Genesis and Angeal, his only close friends. _

_However, his hatred never truly went away and with it came a terrible depression, a depression which numbed him to the world and made everything grey and futile. Nothing could seem lift this feeling; nothing could really penetrate him. He was just a walking corpse, going through the motions of life without really living it._

_"And what are you?" He whispered his eyes wide and unfocused. "With those eyes, why did you look at me with them? Did you not know that I could never escape from them, is that what you want?" He brought his face closer to the window, his forehead touching the cool glass. "The world is not a nice place for angels who don't deserve to die." His breath fogged up the window and he brought up a pale hand to run his fingers through the patch._

_Eight days it has been since he set eyes on the cherub. How could such a normal night turn into the most important moment of his life?_

_He'd been walking home from his job when he realised he was in need of a few groceries, this annoyed him as his fame usually caused him awkward moments with followers in public places such as food shops and he normally had someone else to run such meagre errands for him. However, it was late and he wasn't and invalid, so he had no choice but to get them himself. He rounded a corner and approached the food store 'Dilly Dalliess' near his complex. Strange name for such an establishment, but there were many unusual people in this city. _

_ He entered the store, pleased to see that it was virtually empty, and began collecting the desired items from the appropriate shelves, not bothering with a basket but merely securing them in his arms. Once he had finished he made his way to the only checkout counter which was opened at such a late hour. He didn't even look up as he placed the contents onto the metallic surface to be scanned by the worker. His mind was pondering over the strategic defence papers he would have to look over once he got home, they were radicle and -he felt- flawed in several ways. He would have to look them over that night and present his corrections and adjustments to Heidegger in the morning, not something he relished._

_"Do you have a store card?" A soft, boyish voice inquired from behind the counter. He paused for a moment before he dragged his eyes away from the ramen in his hands and up to meet, honestly, the most breath- taking eyes he had ever seen in his life. Two dazzling blue orbs stared into his and for a moment he felt as though he was transparent, like those eyes were looking right into him. Penetrating him. _

_Taken aback, he quickly scanned the person's face found it just as pleasing. An almost-heart-shaped face was framed by a shock of bright yellow hair that fell in curves around his face and neck but stood in strange loose spikes everywhere else. The feathers of a Chocobo came to mind._

_Pale skin, a petite nose and fleshy light- pink lips would have given the face an effeminate look if not for the line of his jaw and brow and the baby- fat still clinging to his cheeks. This was a boy, but one possessing a rare kind of beauty which left Sephiroth stricken by the unexpected happenstance of finding it here, in a common grocery store. He had never seen anyone like him._

_ "Uh, sir, do you have a store card?" He hadn't realised he had been staring until he heard the boy speak again. He shook his head quickly._

_"No." He stated firmly. He was no blubbering imbecile, even in the face of such perfection._

_"Okay, would you like to apply for one?" The boy smiled. It was a smile that could put any god or goddess to shame, but it also seemed strained and somewhat awkward, as though he wasn't use to it. _

_"No." He said again._

_"Okay, that will be 56.79 please." The boy answered mechanically. He fetched his wallet and handed the boy the required Gil. He allowed his eyes to trail over the small form as he dealt with the money. His pale lithe body was just as pleasing as his face, even in a black work t-shirt and similarly coloured pants. He was shorter than average, but was still growing so that may change._

_ The boy turned back around and smiled nervously as he handed back the change, he seemed rather nervous during the whole exchange really, but that was to be expected. He wasn't nearly as bad as most of the fools he usually dealt with…_

_"Thank you. Please come again soon." _

_He didn't reply, just turned and exited the shop without looking back._

_There, that was it, one small exchange that sent his whole body into this state of...he didn't know what, but it was confusing and it was frustrating and it was delicious. For the first time in his life he felt exhilarated. Truly interested in something. These feeling had come on him so fast that they were difficult to decipher; feeling of possessiveness and protectiveness and lust and impatience all together. _

_Eight days and nights he had spent convincing himself to forget the angel, that it was just a silly and childish infatuation which would go away eventually. The boy was too young, he had told himself, and he was just a human like all the rest. Nothing new; nothing special. But why had he bothered? He realised now that it was foolish to ignore this. Why try to fight the one thing that interested him? Perhaps he was meant to see the boy that night, to fall in love with him in that single moment. He was chosen as the one who would have this breath taking boy, protect him and own him. It was the planets gift to him, and he couldn't ignore that. _

_"Forgive me for what I might become," he whispered, raising his eyes to the sky, "but I will have you, you will be mine..."_

* * *

"Cloud!"

Cloud Strife turned away from his locker and looked over at the girl who was currently shuffling down the school corridor with a precariously balanced tower of books and other items held in front of her. He chuckled lightly as he watched her repeatedly bump into other student's without apologising. They gave her annoyed glances but didn't do anything else, seeming to be used to it.

"Hey Yuf." He greeted when she finally reached him.

"Hey! You're not working Saturday, right?" She asked as she opened her own locker and began unloading her arm-full into the already untidy space.

"No," he nodded, closing his locker and leaning against it as he watched her, his own books held against his side. Once she got everything piled in she quickly slammed the locker door shut, not giving anything a chance to fall out, and then locked it using a padlock which had several multi-coloured fuzzy balls hanging out of it.

"Awesome! There's like, the biggest party of the year at Tifa's house this weekend. I'm so excited! Reno, Axel, Leon, Yuna, Tidus and Zack are all coming! This will be so fun; we haven't had a good session in a while." She was babbling, Cloud shook his head.

"Yuffie, we went to the 'biggest party of the year' two weeks ago," he stated dryly, "anyway I don't know if I can make it, my mom's pretty sick this week and I'd feel bad leaving her alone. And…don't we have that test Monday?"

"Oh come ooooon Cloud, your mom wants you to have fun and you never do coz you're always worrying. You need to come out." Yuffie was persistent.

Cloud sighed and then nodding his head. How did she always manage to convince him to do what she wanted?

"That test is just a stupid little pop quiz anyway, there's no point worrying about it until, like an hour before it." She waved her hand out to the side, almost giving a passing student a black eye. He ungracefully dodged her and shot her a dirty look but just continued on.

"I'll see what I can do." He relented. Yuffie smiled and punched her knuckle into the air.

"Woo hoo, another victory for the greatest ninja out there. Yah!"

"Oh…Kay."

The shrill school bell rang out bleakly moments later, informing them that the school day had officially begun. Cloud and Yuffie left the lockers and began to make their way to their first study class.

"Uh, we've got maths after this." The small girl complained. Cloud had to agree with her unhappiness, he was more an English and History person. Numbers just weren't his forte.

Study sessions took place in the smaller of the two school libraries, which they soon entered and sought out their appointed seats.

The teacher wasn't there yet so the blond took out his books and began some homework he'd left out the night before; that's what study classes were for after all, no one actually studied in them. These classes were mixed, meaning all different years were in at the same hour and that led to a high noise volume which made the concentration level needed for real studying impossible.

"Oh Cloudy. What am I gonna do with you? Only nerds start work before the teachers come in, you know that?" Cloud jumped slightly when a tanned hand slammed down on his desk. He shook his head before bringing his eyes up to meet a pair of smirking purple orbs.

"Or smart people..." He smirked back, shrugging.

"Hmm," the boy made pretence of thinking over it, looking towards the ceiling. "Nope. Just nerds. Sorry." He countered, holding his hands out in front of him and pressing his lips together. The raven-haired teen then leaned forward and ruffled the blonde's spikes, which caused the boy to growl and swat him away. People didn't that to him often, it was like a compulsion or something…he didn't know.

The older boy then took his seat in the desk beside him and began opening his own books, though Cloud was fairly sure he wouldn't actually look at them.

Zack Fair, in Clouds opinion, was one of the most handsome and charming people out there. He was eighteen, a senior in the school, but he looked older. The boy had an envious height of six foot and a muscled body that was broad but still slim at the same time; it was hard to explain. He had tanned skin and dark raven hair which would have reached below his shoulders if he let it out of the loose ponytail he always wore it in.

His face was incredibly handsome, with unusual purple eyes, a sculpted nose, a very strong jawbone and nice lips that always seemed to be smirking lopsidedly. Yes, Zack Fair was a heart-breaker according to every girl in the school.

He was also one of the nicest people the blond knew, because despite being popular and well known for his athletic attributes in the school, he was very down to earth and friendly and possessed a great deal of common decency and integrity. Even though the two were very different, he and Cloud had best friends since they were little.

"So, what's new with you?" The boy asked, clearly not interested in school work at the moment.

"Nothing really, I've mostly been working and staying at home. You?"

"Um, I went out with some guys Sunday night, I got pretty sloshed." Cloud shook his head and mumbled something like 'that's new'. Zack shot him a look.

"Ah, mean chocobo- head. Anyway, my head fell off Monday." The older male pouted, literally looking like a five year old. Cloud couldn't hold in the laugh.

"But you got it back on?" He commented, reaching over to pat the top of the head in question. The dark locks were silky beneath his fingers.

"Yeah", Zack answered, sighing dramatically "it's just too pretty to lose.". Cloud narrowed his eyes and pulled his hand back.

"Sure." He breathed out, turning back to the open book on the table. Zack shifted beside him.

"Well it's true." He said and then tapped his fingers on the younger boy's desk annoyingly. "But you don't have to be jealous, Cloudy."

"Oh, Good."

"Because you're just as pretty as me. Maybe prettier even." Cloud looked at him, exasperated by his childishness. Zack scrunched his face up and placed his hand under his own chin.

"Hmm," he said, furrowing his brows. "Well, not if you scowl like that. Makes you look like an old man. You'll get wrinkles y'know." He widened his eyes, as though the words were meant to terrify the boy. Cloud placed his elbow on the desk and leaned his cheek on his fisted hand.

"You do realise that boys shouldn't be 'pretty'?" He questioned slowly. Zack shook his head.

"Nah," he said, "they can when they look like us. With our eyes and shiny-"

"Gaia," Cloud interrupted him, "when did you turn so-"

"Oh no," it was Zack's turn to interrupt him, and he held a finger at the bond's face. "I know what mean things you're going to say chocobo-head so just keep it closed. Mean boy." He shook his head, a mock stern look on his face. Cloud chuckled and rubbed his forehead.

"Okay," he conceded, smiling. Zack made a pleased sound with his throat while he turned back to the words written in front of him.

_The first Wutian war began in…_

"Cloud."

He closed his eyes.

"Yeah." Testily.

"I play sports."

Gaia, he wasn't going to get any work done.

* * *

"I'm fucking starving!" Reno shouted as the group made their way towards the cafeteria.

Cloud, who was standing beside him, cringed at the volume of his voice as the others laughed. They made their way to a table near the window where they always sat. Cloud between Zack and Reno, Leon between Yuffy and Reno and of course Yuna and Tidus across the table from the rest, they were nice but their 'unashamed love' made it uncomfortable to sit beside them.

"You've got to love chocobo chilli day." Reno moaned with his mouth full, earning a smack on the head from Yuna.

"That's disgusting!" She hissed at him. He just grinned causing Zack to let out a loud laugh before turning to Cloud.

"You sure you don't want a burger, chocobo head?" He asked. Cloud, unlike the others, always packed a lunch instead of buying it at school; he didn't see the point in wasting money, and Gaia knew what was in that cafeteria food anyway. It could be some strange colours sometimes.

He smiled at Zack and shook his head,

"No, I'm okay. I think my sandwich is a lot healthier than whatever you're eating."

"Okay, but I would rather have something hot, if I were youuuu." Zack pressed. He worried about Cloud; he always had ever since they were young. He didn't like to see him stressed or sad and was always trying to find ways to make him happy. Cloud was stubborn, however, so it was difficult to tell him what to do, especially when fists or knees were involved. Mean boy.

"I'm fine, stop worrying." Cloud said genuinely as he looked into his eyes. There was no way to argue with that look.

"Yo, Fair." The group looked over to see three of Zack and Reno's team members approach the table. Seifer, Axel and Loz .

Axel was friendly enough, though he tended to have a…dark view on things. He hung out with them sometimes. Seifer was a bit of a prick that they rarely associated with and Loz was… Loz. He was a bit slow, and was relying on an athletic scholarship to get him into college.

"Hey! What's up?" Zack got up from the table to talk to them.

"The coach wants to see us all at one, so we have to go now," Axel answered, "Cid will beat our asses if we're late, you too Reno." He motioned for the redhead to get up.

"Oh for fuck sake, I'm quitting the fucking team!" The other redhead spat as he pushed himself up from the table, using his arms as leverage. Axel laughed causing Reno to punch him in the arm; they could have been brothers instead of cousins.

"So Cloud?" The blond turned quickly when his name was called softly. He looked up in confusion at Seifer, who was peering down at him with a strange smile.

"Yeah?"

"You goin to Tifa's Saturday?" Seifer asked him, again softly, which was unusual for the loud mouthed senior. Cloud blinked.

"Well, um, I was thinking about it," he answered, unsure why the other was asking "…Are you?"

"Yeah I am. Might see ya there." The jock answered, giving the blond a smile before turning to leave with the other redheads.

Zack narrowed his eyes as he watched the whole exchange. There was only one reason Seifer Almasy would be interested in someone like Cloud attending a party and that thought made his blood boil. He knew the boy's reputation, what he did to people. He was a lowlife, such that you would find in the lowest level of the slums. He was only in this school due to a government grant his mother had acquired and made no attempt to leave his roots behind. The boy was dangerous, and he wouldn't be going anywhere near the blond.

"Zack."

He blew out some air and looked over to where Reno was calling him. "C'mon." The redhead shouted, motioning with his hand.

"Yeah yeah," he shouted back. He looked back at the blond, who was eating his sandwich and talking to Yuffie, and then went to join the others.

"You may be smart Cloudy, but you are way too naive."


	3. III

**Disclaimer: I don't own Final fantasy or any other Square Enix characters.**

* * *

"Hey Cloud, wait up. Ah, you walk too fast." Cloud stopped at the school gate and looked back to see Zack making his way towards him. School was finished for the day and Cloud was just about to begin his fifteen minute walk home. He was in a bit of a rush as it was already four fifteen and he needed to be at work by five thirty.

"Hey." He said once the older teen reached him. "Don't you have training today?"

"Nah, it got cancelled until tomorrow. The coach said something about a conference or something. Meh, wasn't listening" The other answered waving his hand in the air before placing it behind his neck, "I'm kinda pissed cause I was really in the mood for it today. Anyway, do you need a ride?"

"Oh, Zack, you don't have t-" but Cloud was interrupted by the other slinging an arm around his shoulder and ushering him towards the school parking lot. Cloud sighed, why did everyone ignore him when he gave a negative answer?

"Oh it's no bother. I kinda like having a blondie like you ride with me, makes me look fly!"

The raven-haired teen smirked. Cloud huffed.

"Fly? Zack, who says fly anymore?" He joked, raising an eyebrow at the other. In response Zack tightened his arm around his neck.

"I, Zachery Fair, king of this fucking school, says it. Alright?" He boasted, ruffling the other's hair with his free hand, earning him an elbow in the gut which caused him to yelp and let go of the blond. Cloud laughed at the boy's wounded expression.

"Hnnn, you're a bully." He complained, looking like he was about to burst into tears any minute.

"Be grateful I didn't aim lower." Cloud stuck out his tongue. Zack mouth formed an 'o'.

"You wouldn't do that to me," uncertainly, "would ya?"

"…"

"Eeevil little boy."

The two then entered the parking lot and made their way over to Zack's bike, which was parked at the very end of the lot. Cloud really loved that bike; it was a 2010 Harley Davidson CVO model, shiny black with a red flame going through the side. Zack had gotten it two years back after working an entire summer to pay for it. Cloud felt himself drool at the sight of the solid steel piece of heaven.

"I'm so jealous." He grumbled to the other who just shrugged.

"Don't be, this thing may look hot but it's a bitch to pay for, especially since uncle dearest insists on not helping me at all." Zack then stood up straight and put on a serious face "You wanted this bike Zachery, so it's your responsibility. You have to learn how to take care of your own things Zachery, what about when you have a house or a family?" The teen mocked as Cloud laughed.

Zack has been living with his uncle Angeal since he was six because his parents travelled a lot with their work and Zack would have had no chance at a proper education with them. Zack didn't mind; the fact was that he completely idolised Angeal, but the man was strict, firm and very, very scary which was in complete contrast to Zack's bubbly and childish personality. It was very funny to watch the two interact.

"He's right, you know. Anyway, Angeal is always so nice." Cloud said as he took the extra helmet Zack offered him.

"Yeah, he's nice to _you,_" Zack scoffed, "he thinks you're a good influence on me, but he's all moody face and rules with me. Not fair." He said as he got on the bike. Cloud jumped on it behind him and wrapped his arms around the others waist, wondering why it always felt so good. Zack started up the bike and they sped out of the parking lot..

* * *

When they arrived at Cloud's apartment complex, Zack parked the bike and they both hopped off, pulling off their helmets and leaving them to rest on the seat.

"You wanna come up for a while? Mom hasn't seen you in ages and I'm sure she'd like to." Cloud asked the other who nodded enthusiastically.

"Yeah." He replied and with that the two headed for the complex. Cloud lived a fairly bad part of town so his building wasn't the nicest. The elevators were broken, the stairs creaked, the pluming and electricity were bad and the paint on the walls was chipped and dirty. Zack really wished Cloud didn't live here but with medical bills and school fees it really was the only realistic option for him.

"Mom, I'm home!" Cloud shouted once he opened the door. He stepped aside to let Zack in.

"Cloud sweetie, I'm in here." Sky Strife shouted from the kitchen. "I've got your dinner ready, come on." Cloud cringed sheepishly at her saying 'sweetie' in front of Zack, especially when the boy puckered his face and tried to pinch his cheek. He dodged the fingers and made for the kitchen.

"Mom you didn't have to cook me anything. I can do it myself, you should be resting." Cloud said as his mother ushered him to the small table. Sky waved her hand as if she were batting away an insect.

"Oh, pish posh, Cloud. What kind of mother doesn't make food for her little baby boy?" She cooed, successfully pinching his cheek.

"Mother…" Cloud complained, burying his face in his hands. Zack let out a loud chuckle as he entered the kitchen.

"She's right Cloudy, you're such a good little boy, you deserve it." He commented towards the very embarrassed blond, who sent him a death glare. Sky smiled brightly at the raven haired teen.

"Zack dear, I haven't seen you in so long, how are you?" She said as she crossed the very small room to hug the boy and give him a kiss on the cheek.

"Yeah, I've been busy with school and practice so I haven't had a lot of free time." He apologised, patting her on the shoulder.

"You kids are so busy lately," Sky grumbled, "you all need to have more fun. Zack, would you like something to eat? Of course you would, you've been at school all day. I'll get you a plate, Cloud make room for Zack. Zack sit down." Zack did as he was told; he didn't think she was really going to listen to any objections anyway because usually when she started rambling like this it was hard to interrupt her. Zack couldn't believe an energetic woman like her could be so sick.

Eight years ago, Sky was diagnosed with Geostigma, a rare immune disease caused by overexposure to Mako. She had progressively been getting worse over the years and was either on medication or in hospital most of the time now. The disease had put a strain on herself and Cloud, both financially and emotionally. It was the reason they had to move into this crummy apartment five years ago as Sky was so sick she could no longer work. Zack knew Cloud was constantly worried about her and he felt bad for him, kids should never have to see their parents sick.

Sky placed a plate of food in front of Zack before sitting down herself and the three of them began to eat.

* * *

"Thank you for shopping at Dilly Dallies, please come again!" Cloud smiled to the customer as she left the store. It dropped from his face the instant she left and he sighed instead, he was nearing the end of a five hour shift and was completely exhausted. The work itself wasn't so bad, but if you put it together with school and homework as well as taking care of his mom on her bad days, then it could be pretty tiring. He didn't mind too much, however, if it helped her out. She got sickness and unemployment benefit which amounted to a pretty decent sum every week but the money he brought in from working in the store was a big help to the both of them, something he was very glad for. Still though, it was pretty exhausting.

He was abruptly brought out of his musing when someone placed a shopping basket, rather harshly, on his counter. He looked up and had to hold in a gasp of shock when he saw who was standing in front of him..._again._ It was none other than Sephiroth, the great General Sephiroth, victor of the Wutian war and the most powerful SOLDIER on the planet since he was seventeen years old. This was the second time in two weeks Cloud had found himself face to face with the Demi-God and just like the first time...he was terrified.

"Aren't you going to serve me?" A silver eyebrow cocked up in annoyance. Cloud flushed, realising he must of looked like a star struck teenager. Definitely not the impression he wanted to make.

"Sorry." The teen answered quickly, cringing when his voice came out a little strange. "You, uh, don't have a store card right?" The silver haired man simply nodded to his question. 'Not much for sentences' Cloud thought dryly as he began scanning the items. The blond got a little nervous when he noticed the man was staring intently at him. He gave him an awkward smile while praying to the gods that the machine would scan faster.

The teen was right to be nervous, this man was _very_ intimidating; he was at least six foot three and had a muscular physique that made him look like he was made of steel. His face was just as dangerously glorious as his body with cat like emerald eyes, a thin nose, fleshy lips and an extraordinary halo of waist length silver hair. He looked like both an angel and a demon in one. He was attractive; one might use the word beautiful, but gave off a dangerous aura that made his features icy and inaccessible.

"That will be 46. 79, please." Cloud informed the General once all the items had been scanned. Sephiroth didn't even change his facial expression as he handed the boy a fifty Gil note, which kind of disturbed Cloud. He got the feeling the man wasn't used to this kind of interaction as he was quite stoic and unfriendly during the whole exchange. His friend's at the store had all been shocked when Cloud told them about serving the famous man ten days ago, they claimed that he had lived across the street for ten years and had never once stepped foot in the store before. Cloud guessed he just wasn't used to it. 'It still doesn't hurt to have some manners though' the blond inwardly grumbled. He handed the man his change saying his usual 'come again' line. The man just nodded before he turned and exited the store so gracefully that he seemed to almost float away.

"Nice talking to you…" Cloud scoffed, shaking his head.

* * *

_Working for Shinra really did have its perks. If you were high enough in the food chain, you could get just about anything you wanted using Shinra resources. Money, sex, weapon's, personal information. Oh yes, with just the touch of a button you could find out just about anything about anyone. All you had to do was type in a name, for example Cloud Strife, and you would find out that the subject is currently fifteen years old, a resident of Briste Street in the 60th apartment complex, apartment number unknown. You would also find out that the subject attends Midgar Holy high school and that his test results, at present, show a 3.68 GPA. The subject's mother is named Sky Strife and is suffering from Geostigma, the father is unknown._

_The only thing he had needed was the boy's full name, an issue he had been worried about until he realised that the boy was employed by the local food store and had been wearing a name tag when he had seen him. He was so entranced by the beauty that he never took the time to read that badge. A foolish mistake, but one which could be easily rectified._

_Luckily, he had a clear view of the store from his balcony so all he had to do was sit out with a glass of expensive bourbon and wait for the boy to enter the store for his shift. He sat out for two evenings until finally at five thirty on a Thursday afternoon the angel appeared. The youth was just a mass of yellow and black from his view (way up on the twelfth floor of his complex) but he seemed to stand out from the rest of the people on the busy street, like he was glowing. This boy really was special._

_He waited a couple of hours, wanting the store to be empty when he went down there. He wanted this for two reasons, the first being his hatred of overly affectionate 'fans' who insisted on performing embarrassing public displays of affection for him, and the second was his desire to be alone with the boy. He knew the boy would be intimidated by being alone with him again and this was strangely satisfying to him, he liked the idea of showing the boy that he was power; he was to be feared and respected by all._

_He made his way down to the store at around ten thirty, happy to see that it was barren of any other customers except one woman who was currently paying for her purchases. The boy seemed to be working alone tonight, this pleased him. He picked up a shopping cart and proceeded to place a few items, which he had taken note of actually needing before he left his apartment, into it. He wandered around the store aimlessly until he heard the front doors slide open and the boy's rather unenthusiastic goodbye, signalling the woman's departure. _

_He made his way over to the counter, watching as his smile disappeared once the woman left and was replaced with a more thoughtful expression. The teen seemed to be so absorbed in his own little world that he didn't take note of his presence at all. This allowed him time to study the youth in more detail, suppressing a smirk as he did so. He was as perfect as he remembered, perhaps even more so._

_He studied that angelic face and took note of the bags beneath his eyes and how the corner of his lips tilted downward slightly, the teen seemed tired and stressed and this made him angry; someone like him should have everything they wanted and should never have to look so exhausted and…unhappy. Ignoring his anger, he concentrated on how adorable the blond looked, his eyes glazed over in thought, his head tilted sideways allowing some hair to fall over his face and his fingers dancing on the metallic counter top. He realised that the boy wasn't going to snap out of his little trance on his own._

_THUMP._

_He watched in amusement as the boy jumped at the sound of him slamming his cart down on the counter, dazed from being brought out of his daydream so abruptly. He fought to contain a smile as the boys eyes widened when he realised who was in front of him, the teen stared for a moment before he looked away and seemed to be trying to compose himself for a minute before he turned back to him._

_"Aren't you going to serve me?" Sephiroth asked, rather rudely. He couldn't seem to soften his aura at all, and why should he have to? One cannot be trained as a deadly killing machine since childhood and still maintain a polite and sensitive personality._

_"Sorry!" The kid all but squeaked, blushing at the sound of his own voice. The general was laughing on the inside but kept his usual expressionless mask on his face. He didn't reply, making the boy more nervous._

_"You uh, don't have a store card, right?" The boy kind of stated and asked at the same time. He couldn't help but be flattered that the boy remembered this, even though he knew that anyone, especially a teenage boy, would remember serving the great General of the Shinra army. Still, it felt good to know that this angel in particular had taken note of that titbit of information. He nodded his head in response to the question. _

_The boy then began to scan his items and he took this time to study him, trailing his eyes from the mass of yellow hair, down his neck and then to his torso. He stopped, lowering his eyes when he glimpsed at something shining on the right side of his chest, over his heart. A badge? Oh of course, his name tag. He had forgotten the whole reason for his visit to the store. He read the tiny gold writing with ease, thanks to mako enhanced eyesight, and smiled inwardly to himself._

_Cloud Strife._

_Cloud, what a perfect name for this angel, innocence seemed to radiate from that name just las it did from Cloud himself. He ran the autonym in his head over and over again while keeping his eyes on its owner. Cloud seemed to notice him staring as he looked up and smiled awkwardly. He could imagine that the boy was rather uncomfortable, and a shiver ran down his spine at the thought of making this beauty squirm._

_"That will be 46.79 please." Cloud said after all the items were scanned. He didn't say anything as he handed the boy the Gil and he noticed how the blond creased his brow slightly. So, he was making the boy angry with his stoic manner? How amusing. Cloud handed him back his change, their fingers almost touching. He collected his bags and exited the store without a word._

_He paused once he was outside and looked in through the store window, watching with curiosity as the boy mumbled something which he was unable to pick up. He arched a slender eyebrow at that. This boy was very beautiful, but perhaps a bit odd. He was a little bundle of contradictions so far, happy and sad, mature and childish, worried and carefree. He looked forward to delving further into his mind. _

_So that was it, the next day he went into the Shinra headquarters and researched the boy's name, finding all the information he could on his life. Of course, a computer could only tell you so much about someone, distant things like their age and job. It couldn't tell you if they were happy, what they liked in the world and what they disliked. He wanted to know Cloud; he wanted to see what made him smile and what made him cry. He wanted to see him at school, at home, with his friends and family. He wanted to be in that boy's life, closer than he'd ever been with anyone before. He wanted to...own him._

* * *

_"These feelings." He whispered, sitting in his living room on a Thursday night, a bottle of gin and a small pile of pictures lay out on the glass table in front of him. "I've never believed such feelings resided within me. You've saved me Cloud, you've woken me up." He picked up one of the pictures. Smiling, almost darkly, at the big blue eyes that stared back at him. The file he looked up earlier that day contained, to his delight, many pictures of the boy. School events, baby pictures, running events and, his favourite, a recent passport picture. He had printed them all out._

_"Tomorrow..." he smiled dreamily, putting down his glass and bringing his hand up to touch the picture already clasped tightly in his other one. He narrowed his eyes as he began tracing the lines of the boy's face with a slender digit. His breathing became quicker as he imagined that the picture was real, that the skin he was tracing was soft and warm, the lips fleshy, he imagined that eye closing shyly as he ran his thumb over its eyelid. He closed his eyes and thought about how their fingers had touched today. These feelings, they were so strong and real, it overwhelmed him. It was bliss, to be rid of that numb feeling, that sickness, and to be in such a state of euphoria. He brought the picture closer to his face, touching his forehead. _

_The cool surface felt nice against his heated skin. He needed release, this excitement was building and without hesitation he began sliding a hand down his chest, past his stomach and to that most sensitive part of his anatomy. His whole body seemed to explode in pleasure when he did so._

_"Tomorrow." He gasped. "I'll see you tomorrow."_


	4. IV

**Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy or any Square Enix characters!**

"This is gonna be so fun, Tifa's bringing in like a truck load of alcohol so we don't even have to worry about getting that ourselves!" Yuffie exclaimed as the rest of the group nodded enthusiastically. It was lunchtime on a very sunny Friday so the group, consisting of Cloud, Yuffie, Yuna, Tidus, Vaan and Penelo were hanging out by the sports field. Zack and Reno were currently playing the game with a couple of other jocks like they did most lunch times.

"Yeah, and her parents aren't due back till Monday, so it's probably gonna be an all nighter." Tidus added.

"Why would that matter to you, Tidus? You're gonna be sleeping with Yuna either way." Penelo teased the boy, who stuck his middle finger up at her and put his arm around his girlfriend's shoulder.

"Yeah but we're always looking for new and exciting places t-"

"Tidus!" Yuna hissed, slapping her boyfriend on the back of his head.

"Sorry babe, you know I was just kidding." Tidus sheepishly apologised, she just rolled her eyes at him in return.

"Well for those of us who aren't old and married this party should be the best." Yuffie smirked suggestively while waggling her eyebrows, ignoring the way Yuna and Tidus started making puppy faces at each other. She really hated couples who acted like that in public. Yuck, Yuck Yucky!

"I know mister Strife here already has an admirer." She nudged the blond boy sitting next to her. Cloud looked up dazed; he had been so absorbed in what he was writing that he had pretty much of zoned out of the conversation.

"What?" He asked the black haired girl, confused.

"Uh, you're such a spaz-head, Cloud." She groaned, letting her tongue hang out of her mouth and leaning forward as if the life had been sucked out of her. "I'm talking about Seifer's sudden interest in weather or not you're going to Tifa's tomorrow night."

"What about it? I talk to Seifer sometimes; he was probably just being friendly." Cloud stated airily, trying to brush the whole thing off. The group all rolled their eyes at that while Vaan opened his mouth in outrage.

"Seifer Almasy is not _friendly,_" he seethed "he's a prick and's only nice to people he wants to screw."

"He doesn't want to screw me." Cloud replied, shocked that the other could even think that.

"And I would never do that with him anyway." He stated as an afterthought.

"We know you wouldn't blond-head, but that doesn't change the fact that _he_ would. He's meany mean mean. You better watch out, that jerk face can get pretty rough. Uh, huh, baaaaaaaaad news." Yuffie replied giving him a wide-eyed look. Cloud rolled his eyes at her over-protectiveness.

"I can take care of myself Yuf, It's not like I'm the one who gets too drunk to even walk properly every weekend." He retorted, earning himself a punch in the shoulder. He frowned at the girl while rubbing his arm. Yuffie just shot him a 'you deserved it' look, flipping her hair to the side huffily.

"Anyway, it doesn't matter because Zack would kill Seifer if he so much as looked at Cloud the wrong way. You know that Yuffie. He's threatened like every guy who's ever tried anything before." Tidus added, nodding his head towards the raven-haired boy out on the field.

"That's true." The rest of the teens apart from Cloud agreed.

The blond pouted, giving an embarrassed, "no he hasn't".

"We're not talking about this again." He said firmly, shooting each of them a look.

"Talking about what?" The group all turned their heads to see Zack standing there, wiping at his face with the shirt he was no longer clothed in. Standing there, he really was a sight for sore eyes; all rippling muscles, sweaty and tanned.

"Oh, we're just talking about Cloud getting laid on Saturday night." Vaan stated jokingly, blowing out some air through his teeth and raising his brows high on his forehead. Cloud hunched his shoulders.

"No, we weren't." The blond mumbled, rubbing his forehead.

"Well, I should hope not." Zack replied, smirking at the blond whose cheeks were now pink with embarrassment. He couldn't believe that no matter how mature Cloud acted, he still got so awkward when anyone talked about his sex life; non-existent as it was. He was a cutie pie.

"Why not Zack? Don't you want little Cloudy to become a maaaan?" Yuffie asked a challenging sneer on her childish face.

"Of course I do _Yuffie,_" Zack answered in an overly polite way, putting emphases on her name, "but I don't think that loosing you're virginity to some drunk at a party is the way to do that. "  
"Isn't that what you did?" Yuffie shot back..

"He's better than me." Zack stated firmly, causing Cloud to look up at him with an unreadable expression.

"Zac-"

"Anyway. Meh, it's almost two and I'm still smelling like a behemoth. I'm off to shower. No girls, you can't come. Or any of you boys. Specially you Vaan. No watchie." Zack interrupted the blond quickly. He gave them a small wave before turning and heading for the school showers.

"Well, that was awkward." Yuffie stated, smiling at Cloud.

"Why did you say that Yuf?" He replied in a tired voice. He rubbed at his hands and stared at her, trying to make her feel guilty.

"Oh, he'll survive. Anyway we better start heading to class soon, we have Reeve next and I really wanna get a seat up front." The black haired girl got to her feet quickly, placing her hands over her heart and smiling dreamily while batting her eyes. "He's so hot and so…sophisticated. The perfect man for the greatest ninja in the world."

"I totally agree, Yuf. Come on Yuna, let's go." Penelo jumped up, pulling Yuna up with her. The three girls linked arms-Yuna rather reluctantly- and began walking in the direction of the school, cooing about their technology teacher the whole way.

The three boys just sat there, blinking.

"Sophisticated? Big word Yuffie!" Vaan mumbled, causing the others to chuckle.

* * *

"Three laps, that's enough for today I guess." Cloud mumbled to himself, wiping at the sweat running down his brow with the back of his hand. Since he was twelve years old, Cloud had run three or four laps around the local park at least five times a week. He didn't play any kind of sports or go to a gym so he had decided to take up running in order to stay in shape. He really enjoyed it now, mostly because it was good way to get rid of the tension that built up in his life.

He leaned forward with his hands on his knees and inhaled deeply. The sound of an engine broke the serene atmosphere and he looked towards the road to see a black motorbike making its way to him at the entrance of the park. This wasn't just any bike though. It was a black Harley Davidson with a red flame on the side. The bike came to a halt a few inches from the blond.

"Hey!" Zack said, taking off his helmet and running a hand through the raven strands on his head, pushing them into some semblance of order.

"Hi," Cloud replied back, standing up straight, "what are you up to?"

"Not much. Just finished training and I figured being the compulsive weirdo you are you'd be

here so… You finished your laps?" Zack asked, running his eyes over the others sweaty form. Cloud was dressed in a loose black tank-top, and baggy shorts- his usual running attire.

"Yeah," Cloud bent down to his gym bag, opening the zipper and rummaging through it, "just finished my third lap. Why? Did you wanna do one?" He asked, looking up at the other from his kneeling position. Zack shook his head, laughing.

"Nah ah! Cid ran us half to death today. My feet are crying so if you want me to run you'll have to carry me home. Not fun at all Cloudy, considering I'm three heads bigger than you." He pressed his bottom lip out and held his hand out in front of him to indicate the size difference.

"Does that mean I'd get to drive your bike to get you home?" Cloud asked, his eyes shining in mock happiness. He took a white towel out of his bag and stood up, wiping himself with it.

"Then we'd both be unconscious." Zack stated dryly, running his fingers over the bike like it was a cherished pet.

"Oh really?" Cloud smirked.

"Oh yea-Oww, hey! Not fair!" Zack yelled, rubbing his backside where Cloud had just whipped him with his towel. Cloud just laughed and whipped him again, this time on his shoulder. "Ah! Oh okay, that's how you wanna play it? Bad choice blondie. "Zack yelled, lunging for the blond who side stepped him and took off running.

Zack spun around with the skill of a trained athlete and began chasing him. Cloud was fast but Zack was both taller and quicker so he caught up to the boy easily, grabbing his arm and pulling them both to the ground. They roughhoused right there on the grass for almost ten minutes, laughing and insulting each other, until they both got tired and just laid there exhausted, looking up at the darkening sky.

"Zack." Cloud said softly after a few minutes silence.

"Hmm,"

"It's not true." He mumbled.

"What's not?" Zack asked, looking over at the other confused.

"I'm not better than you Zack. Not at all." Cloud answered, sitting up. He sighed and ruffled his hair to get rid of the leaves and grass which had got tangled in it during their activities.

"Yes you are." Zack smiled, copying the others actions and sitting up himself. "But that's okay. I'm mostly to blame anyway."

"What?"

"Yeah. My super amazing mentoring skills have kept you from becoming a party mog. If it wasn't for me you'd be showing that white ass all of yours all over the city. Bad bad stuff." He clenched his teeth and shook his head, as though seriously disturbed by the thought.

"Well, as long as you're happy." He drawled, fiddling with a piece of grass in his fingers.

"Don't know how ya manage to cope with all your mom stuff though. Can't take full responsibility for that."

"You'd be surprised by what you're capable of doing when someone you love needs you." Cloud answered, staring straight ahead thoughtfully.

"Yeah?" Zack asked softly, also looking ahead of himself.

"Yeah" Cloud smiled. After a couple of minutes, he stretched out his hands in front of him and turned his head towards Zack, merriment shining in his eyes. "Hey, wake up!"

Zack, who had been in a bit of a daydream, jumped slightly at the sound of the others voice, causing the blond to chuckle. The raven haired teen rubbed a hand over his face before shooting the boy a dirty look.

"Don't scare me chocobo-head. Uh, you're really sadistic today y'know. Hitting me and putting grass down my pants.?" Zack grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest and huffing.

"No I didn't," Cloud said, eyes squinting in confusion.

"Yeah well, you were just about to, if I didn't move away. You're just a demented pervert behind that squishy face." He explained, running his eyes up and down the others form in suspicion. Cloud saw this and pushed him away.

"You're the pervert Zack," He laughed. Zack held his hands up in surrender.

"Okay, okay. I'm sorry so just don't hurt me again please," he said, "but speaking of pervs, you'd better watch out for Seifer tomorrow night. I don't like the way he's been looking at you lately." This was stated seriously, he tried to catch the blonde's eye to convey that he wasn't joking. The blond wouldn't return the favour, however, and let out a loud groan while rolling his eyes towards the sky.

"Not you too Zack." He complained. "I can take care of myself."

"I know you can, but that guy is pretty tough. Just promise me you'll be careful." Zack replied, still serious.

"Whatever!" Cloud gave in sulkily. Zack smiled, ruffling his hair.

"Good boy. I'll buy you a lollypop."

* * *

Cloud sat in front of his dressing table, staring intently at his reflection. It was Saturday night- the night of Tifa's party, and he was almost finished getting ready. He gathered some hair product into his hands and ran them through his hair, ruffling it a bit to achieve his desired 'bed head' look. "As if I need help with that." He mumbled to himself. He never really used hair product, his hair being gravity defying enough as it was, but he usually put a small bit in his hair going to parties or clubs, just to give it a more edgy style.

He stopped fussing with his hair and brought his hands down, wiping them in his pant leg to remove the sticky residue. He studied his reflection critically, he was dressed in a tight black sleeveless shirt, black jeans and black converse shoes topped off with silver dog tags and slightly styled hair. Deciding he was ready, he opened the top drawer of his dresser and took out a black box which he kept his money in, grabbing a twenty. He was just standing up when he heard a knock on the front door. Figuring it was Leon, Cloud quickly put on his jacket and exited his bedroom.

He looked at the clock while opening the front door. "You're earl-" he started to remark but stopped when he saw who was at the other side of the door; not Leon but Shera Highwind. Shera was a very good friend of Sky's and often came around to keep her company since Sky had very few friends now and couldn't really leave the house. Shera was a little strange, in Clouds opinion, but she was very nice and he appreciated her keeping his mom company.

"Well hello there Cloud. Don't you look handsome!" Shera complemented as Cloud stepped aside to let her in. "Is your mom awake?" She asked in a soft voice. Cloud didn't know how such a quite woman could live with a man like Cid Highwind: Zack's coach and Shera's husband.

"Yeah she's just in her room. I'll go get her." Just as he said it, Sky came out of her bedroom, smiling brightly at the two. She was dressed in a white nightdress with her blond hair tied into a neat bun. She had been quite sick earlier that day and her face was now ghostly white.

Cloud had been reluctant to leave her alone tonight but she insisted that she felt better now.

"Shera, darling. How are you?" Sky asked, walking over to hug her friend. Shera laughed, returning the hug.

"Oh Sky, if I had to listen to that man for one more second I think I'd have to pull out my own fingers." Shera grumbled causing Sky to laugh and Cloud to give her a 'psycho' look. Strange woman…

"Cid is an earful." Sky agreed.

"Um," Cloud interrupted the two "I'm gonna head downstairs and wait for Leon so he won't have to come all the way up here." He explained, pointing his thumb towards the door. "Bye mom, call me if you need anything." He said, giving her a kiss on the cheek. He gave Shera a small wave and headed outside.

* * *

When Cloud and Leon arrived at Tifa's, the party was in full swing. Tifa's house was huge, her father being the Mayor of the town, and it had an enormous garden with a pool out back.

When Cloud got out of Leon's car he could hear the music blazing pretty loud and kids already splashing in the pool. He shook his head a looked over at Leon who just shrugged.

"Rich kid's throw crazy parties." The brunette mused, slamming the door of his car and moving towards the entrance of the house. Cloud followed him, passing some guys who were sitting on the grass snorting meteor dust from a piece of tinfoil. Cloud wrinkled his nose at that and followed Leon up the steps towards the front door. It was open and Cloud could see that this place was totally packed. He entered the house and, almost deafened by the music, began making his way through the hall which had teens lined up against the walls like some drunken guard of honour. He walked into what was probably the living area and was pleased to see that it was less packed and that the music was a little lower there.

"Cloud! Leon!" He turned to see Yuffie and Axel sitting on one of the couches with drinks in their hands.

"Hey," he replied, walking over to them and taking a seat beside Axel.

"Hey there. This party is sucky so far y'know." Yuffie complained, flicking her empty cup in her hands. "Meh, I need another drink. You want one, Cloud? Leon?" Yuffie asked, getting up from her seat a bit wobbly.

"Okay." Cloud replied, drumming his fingers against his lap and looking around himself a bit awkwardly.

"I'll come with you." Leon said and both he and Yuffie made their way towards the kitchen, leaving Cloud alone with Axel. They had never really talked one on one before so it was a little awkward.

"Nice jacket." Axel commented to the blond who nodded, looking down and fidgeting with said jacket.

"Thanks, it was my Dad's" Cloud replied.

"Cool."

"Yeah..."

"AXEL!"

Both turned their heads in the direction of the doorway to see a very drunken Reno stumble inside "I didn't know you were here cuz! An Cloudy too? Shit, this party is fucking good." The redhead yelled as he was guided to the couch by another boy. He was plopped down beside Cloud.

"Gaia..." Axel mumbled, running a hand over his face. Reno inched closer to Cloud who backed away, trying not to laugh.

"Damn blondie! Yer lookin fuckin' hot tonight. If you weren't Zack's boy I'd fu-"

"How did you get this drunk so fast Reno?" Axel questioned wearily, interrupting his cousins lewd remark.

"Oh come on maaan, loosen up a bit," Reno slurred. He leaned over Cloud to give Axel a pat on his shoulder, which was slapped away testily. However, Reno pressed on, pushing his fingers into the boy's face until he retaliated, leaning over to punch him in the shoulder. The two then began a swiping match, ignoring Cloud who was caught in the middle. The blond wiggled a bit, sliding down beneath their arms and off the couch where he landed on the floor with a thump. He was about to get up when he heard Yuffie's voice.

"There he i-uh, Cloud?" The small girl yelled confused.

Cloud put his hand on the couch and pushed himself up until he was in sight of her. "I'm here Yuf." He said sheepishly, raising his hand. He looked over and saw that she was standing in the doorway with Leon and Zack who all looked at him curiously.

"What are you doing down there?" The drunken girl giggled, walking over to him with two drinks in her hand. He stood up and took a can of Budweiser from her.

"Trying to avoid a black eye." He answered, pointing his thumb towards the squabbling redheads on the couch. Zack walked over to the two, laughing.

"Guy's, no family disputes in public, remember?" He joked, earning dirty looks from both Reno and Axel, who had stopped fighting and turned their attention towards him.

"Fuck you Fair!" Reno slurred, waving his hand in the air aimlessly. The redhead seemed to muse over something and then "Fuck this, I need more drink. You want one Ax?" He asked calmly, their dispute seemingly forgotten.

"Maybe you've had…Ah, whatever lets go." With that, both of the redheads left the room in search for some alcohol.

Zack chuckled at the two before turning towards Cloud. "Hey chocobo, having fun?"

"I will now." the blond replied, holding up his can. "How long have you been here?"

"About an hour or so, it's pretty crazy huh?" Zack answered, grabbing a cushion from the couch and sitting down on the floor. The others followed his lead and they formed a little circle.

"Yeah." Cloud chuckled, though it was slightly strained.

"Uck, how do you drink that raw, Leon?" Yuffie asked in disgust, referring to the bottle of vodka in Leon's hand. The stoic teen just shrugged in response.

"At least he's not doing the dust like those guys out front. They've got to be crazy. That stuff can kill you." Cloud spoke up, shaking his head. Zack sucked in a breath of air through his teeth and nodded.

"Pretty intense." He agreed.

"Pretty idiotic." Leon mumbled.

"Oh, that too." Zack laughed.

* * *

Cloud put his hands under the tap, drenching them in cool water. It was two hours into the party and the blond was feeling pretty buzzed. He was currently in one of the upstairs bathrooms washing his hands after reliving himself. The downstairs restrooms were rather occupied (for lack of a better word) so he had to go the whole way upstairs and into one of the on-suite bathrooms, quite a hassle for a slightly drunken teen. He turned off the tap, grabbing a towel to dry his hands and then exited the bathroom.

"Hey."

Startled, the blond looked up to see that the bedroom he was about to exit wasn't empty. Seifer Almasy was sat on the bed with two drinks in his hand, grinning at the blond, his face flushed with intoxication.

"Hey Seifer. I… didn't hear you come in." Cloud said a little shakily, not comfortable with being taken off guard.

"Yeah, I'm like that." The older blond said lowly. He stood up from the bed and held out a closed can to Cloud. "I got you a drink."

"Um, I already have one downstairs," Cloud replied, motioning his head towards the door, "so I'd better-"

"It will still be there." Seifer said forcefully, urging the boy to take the drink. Cloud looked around for a minute before sighing and accepting it with a small smile.

"Thanks." He said. Seifer nodded, staring intently at the blond. His pupils were dilated and he was swaying from side to side. Perhaps more than drunk. He spun around on his heal and walked back over to the bed and sat down.

"Come sit." Seifer said, patting the spot next to him on the bed. Cloud ran his hand through his hair, looking at the door behind him before bringing his eyes back to Seifer.

"I'd better get back Seifer." He said finally. He was about to open the door when he heard Seifer sigh in exasperation.

"Oh come on Cloud, I'm not gonna fucking bite or anything," he laughed, "please?"

Cloud sighed, he knew that he should probably get out of there as fast as he could but then again Seifer was just a high school kid, albeit a high school kid with a bad reputation, it's not like he was a murderer or anything. He sighed again and smiled lightly at the other.

"Okay." He relented, walking over to the bed and sitting down stiffly. "Just for a while." He cautioned.

"Cool!" Seifer smirked. Cloud opened his can and took a drink, trying to relax a bit. They sat in relative silence for a couple of minutes, one relaxed and the other tense, before Seifer spoke up.

"So, any partners tonight?" He nudged the blond suggestively.

"No." Cloud replied, shaking his head. He stopped when he started feeling dizzy from the motion.

"Why not?" Cloud just shrugged. Seifer smiled in a way that made his eyes narrow.

"Because of Zack?" He asked suggestively. Cloud wrinkled his nose at that.

"Me and Zack are just friends." He stated firmly, his voice coming out a bit slurred due to the alcohol.

"You sure about that?"

"Yes."

"Okay, okay, whatever you say." Seifer held up his hands in surrender, seeing that he had hit a nerve. He seemed to muse over something for a minute and then looked back at the boy.

"So your single?"

"I guess so." The blond shrugged, taking another swig of his beer.

"Well isn't that a coincidence? So am I!" The elder drawled, running his eyes up and down Cloud's form.

"That's not what I hear," Cloud said, oblivious to the staring, "I hear you have a new partner every weekend"

"Well," Seifer drawled again, boldly reaching out to touch the others bang, "I'm just searching..."

"For what?" Cloud asked curiously, turning to look him in the eye. Seifer lowered his hand from the blonde's hair and took hold of his drink.

"For the right person, like everyone else is." He mumbled, taking the others can. Cloud was beginning to feel uneasy and edged away as Seifer leaned over him to place his drink on the locker. His drunken mind was beginning to clear and he was realising that he had gotten himself into a precarious position.

"Seifer, I'd better get going." Cloud started to say but was cut off when the older boy caught hold of his hand. Cloud tried to pull away but his grip was firm; very firm. Panic began to rise in the teen's chest.

"Shh Cloud. Just let me show you." Seifer whispered as he leaned in close to the others face.

"Come on Cloud, you know you want-OWW!" He jumped back when Cloud kicked his shin, giving the blond time to get up from the bed and run towards the door. "Cloud? What the FUCK!" Seifer yelled as he regained his bearings and got up to follow him. He exited the bedroom and saw the blond heading down the hall towards the stairs. "Cloud." He shouted, breaking into a run.

Clouds mind was in a panic as he ran down the hall. He was just about to turn for the stairs when he felt a tug on the back of his top (he had left his jacket downstairs). He was then pulled back forcefully and fell against the wall.

"What the hell is your problem?" Seifer asked, leaning down in front of Cloud.

"I just wanna go downstairs Seifer." The blond said, trying to sound calm. Seifer's eyes looked like the eyes of a madman as they widened in rage.

"WHY?" He shouted, causing Cloud to jump and back up into the wall. "I didn't do anything. What are ya going to start saying to everyone?" He whispered, placing both hands on Clouds shoulders and leaning in. Cloud tried to catch his eye as he shook his head.

"Nothing," the blond denied "I just want to go down to my friends." He explained slowly, as if he was talking a man down from the edge of a building. This was bad, Seifer was way too worked up and the music was too loud for anyone to hear them.

"I'm not your friend?" Seifer hissed. Cloud opened his mouth to speak but was cut off when Seifer continued, "You think you're too good for me?" and Cloud shook his head desperately, he felt sick and his head was spinning.

"Seifer. Let. Me. Go." The blond said firmly, looking into the others eyes without blinking.

"No." Seifer spat, the word dripping off his tongue like venom. "I'm sick of always doing what people want. I want to do what I want for a change and that Cloudy," He cooed the blonds name, "is you!" He said as he crashed his lips against the smaller boys with bruising force. Clouds eyes widened in shock and he pushed against the others chest with all his strength. Seifer was a lot stronger than Cloud and he easily restrained the teen. Cloud closed his eyes in despair but opened them when he felt Seifer pull away quickly. He looked up and was met with a pair of very angry purple eyes.

"You son of a bitch!" Zack seethed, eyeing Seifer like he was a piece of trash. "Get the fuck off of him." He growled. Seifer looked like he was going to obey for a minute before something seemed to click in his head and he looked up at Zack challengingly. He wasn't in his right mind, his hands were shaking and his eyes weren't focusing properly.

"Make me." He smirked, raising a hand to Clouds hair, stroking it. Cloud was just about to slap the hand away when Zack lunged for the older blond, knocking him off Cloud and onto the floor.

"I'll kill you." Zack roared, punching the other square in the jaw. Seifer kicked his legs upwards, knocking him off balance and then head-butting him in the forehead.

"What's your problem Fair? You're another bastard. Think you're shit don't smell." Seifer sneered, spitting out blood with each word.

"Better than a piece of trash like you." Zack shot back, kneeing Seifer in the stomach. Cloud got up, using the wall for support and watched the two squabbling violently on the floor.

"Stop!" He cried but was ignored by the two. "Zack. Stop." He tried again. The music was blaring so loud that the fight went totally unnoticed downstairs and Cloud didn't want to leave them alone so he had no choice but to remain and try to intervene.

"Oh trash am I, coz I'm not hanging from my famous uncles belt buckles." Seifer jeered, getting an elbow underneath the other chin and pushing upwards. Zack gagged for a minute and then pulled himself back.

"No, you're just leeching off the fucking government instead. You shouldn't even be in this school." Cloud barely recognised the boy as he spat out the venomous words.

The violence went on several more minutes, both continuing to kick and punch and insult like madmen, until finally Zack seemed to get the upper hand when he punched Seifer in the temple, successfully knocking him out. Cloud watched in horror, however, when Zack did not stop punching the teen but just kept on delivering bone cracking shots to his body. "Zack!" Cloud shouted, rushing over and trying to get the boy to come to his senses. The dark-haired boy was drunk as well, even more so than Cloud.

"ZACK!" He called, feeling his eyes water at force of the boy's punches. He could really be causing damage. He grabbed Zack's arm and yelled "Stop," once again. Zack stopped mid-punch, looking up at the blond, dazed.

Zack's mind was fogged. He remembered sitting down stairs and thinking that Cloud was taking a long time in the bathroom; too long. He had gone out to the downstairs bathroom and saw that the blond wasn't in it so he had decided to walk upstairs in search of him instead. He remembered going upstairs and seeing Seifer towering over Cloud. The blond was struggling.

The last thing he saw was Seifer leaning in to kiss Cloud before his vision went red.

"Cloud?" He asked softly. He then looked down at his hand in the others hold, covered in blood. What had he just done? He looked at Cloud's white face and his stomach dropped. The blond looked scared. His blue eyes were full of tears. What the fuck had he just done? Cloud didn't say anything; he just stared at the other wide-eyed.

He quickly got off the unconscious blond and keeled beside Cloud. "Uh, this isn't good." He muttered. Cloud let go of his arm and bent down to check Seifer, he was breathing and his body seemed more damaged than his head. Cloud let out a breath of relief.

"He's okay, I think." He stated, looking at Zack. Zack nodded, running a hand through his hair. "You're all hurt." Cloud said sadly, taking the elders hand in his to inspect the bleeding knuckles.

"It's nothing," Zack assured "just a few bruises, we should probably call a doctor for_ him_ though." He said, referring to the unconscious teen. Cloud nodded and was about to take out his phone when Seifer started coughing and shifting. The bloody blond eventually opened his eyes, looking at the ceiling for a minute before dragging them over to the two beside him.

"Fuck," he hissed, laughing "you throw one hell of a punch Fair." Zack inched backwards, dragging Cloud with him, as Seifer slowly sat up, hissing as he jolted a sore rib. The blond then got to his feet using the wall for support. Cloud and Zack also stood up, eying him warily.

"Seifer, you need a doctor." Cloud spoke up. Seifer brought his bleary eyes towards him slowly.

"Ha, just a few bruises and cuts. Gaia knows I've seen worse." He chuckled wetly before he turned serious again. "I'm sorry Cloud. Didn't mean that. Just a bit fuck up, my fucked up life is…no fuck it." He laughed again, shaking his head. Cloud looked at him sadly, he just seemed so…broken. "Good thing ya came in ther fair. Couda got serious."

"It did." Zack said, his tone clipped.

"It doesn't matter now. You need a doctor." The younger blond interrupted, earning himself a disbelieving look from Zack. Seifer nodded and began heading for the stairs, he was leaning his hand on the wall which left a trail of blood behind him.

"Where are you going?" Cloud asked, worried, both about his mental and physical condition.

"Fucked if I know." Seifer shouted back, giving the two a wave and heading down the stairs.

"Oh…kay." Zack uttered after a moments silence. Cloud shook his head.

"He needs a doctor. He's off his head."

"He'll be okay Cloudy." Zack said. Cloud could tell he wanted the conversation to finish so he sighed.

"Think he's leaving?" He asked the older teen who shrugged, wincing when the movement jarred his body.

"Come on." Cloud said, noticing the movement. He took the taller teen's hand and led him back through the bedroom and into the bathroom he had previously used. "Sit." He ordered, motioning towards the closed toilet seat. Zack did as he was told, a small but groggily. Cloud got a clean towel from beneath the sink and ran it under the cold tap.

"Well, that wasn't fun at all?" Zack said, trying to lighten the mood somewhat. Cloud nodded, walking over to the him with the soaked towel. "Good thing I didn't think you pissed for that long." He muttered.

"Head up." the blond commanded softly, dabbing the towel on Zack's bleeding eyebrow.

"Sorry!" Cloud said when the boy hissed in pain.

"Are you really though?" Zack answered through clenched teeth. Cloud moved onto his split lip, wiping the blood away. Zack noticed his hands were shaking. "Okay there Chocobo-head?"

"Just a little… y'know." The blond replied softly.

"He didn't do anything-"

"No." The blond interrupted quickly. "I don't really think he would have. He was just drugged or something," Cloud kneeled down in front of Zack, looking the other in the eye, "thank you though. You're a hero." He said, taking one of Zack's hands in his and running the cloth over the bloody knuckles. Zack smiled, he liked hearing that. He wanted to be a hero.

"Yeah, and I have good hair so I'm basically perfect!" Zack smirked. Cloud shook his head in wonder, this guy never changed.

"Don't let it get to your head." Cloud joked, giving him a pointed look.

"Awe, you saying I'm big headed or something yellow-head?" Zack gasped in mock hurt. Cloud nodded his head, laughing. His entire body was shaking but he tried to ignore it.

...

"I kind of wanna go home now." The blond said softly, after he finished fixing the other up. Zack nodded.

"Yeah, that ruined the mood for me too. Wanna share a taxi?" He asked while standing up from the toilet, groaning at the movement.

"You sure?" Cloud felt guilty, he didn't want to ruin the other's night. Then again, Zack couldn't really stay there looking the way he did.

"Oh yeah, I need a bed, pronto. I'm all bloody and gross." Zack chuckled, blowing some hair out of eyes. Cloud mumbled 'okay' with his eyes downcast. The dark haired boy motioned the boy towards him and when Cloud was close enough he wrapped his arms around him.

"Let's get goin." Zack said after a few minutes, leading the blond out the door.

* * *

Brriiing Briiing

"Uhhhh!" Cloud groaned, rolling over in his bed.

Briiing Briiing

"Gaia!" He grumbled. Who the hell would call him this early in the morning.

Briiing Briiing

"Okay!" He moaned, sitting up in his bed and grabbing the incessant cell phone from his locker.

Briiing briii-

"Hello?" He growled out. Why should he be polite? He was tired.

"Cloud."

"Yuffie?" Cloud asked, confused. "What's wrong?"

"Cloud! Did you hear bout Seifer?…He's dead."


	5. V

**Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**  
**Warning, This chapter has violence, NCS activity and an upsetting scene so if you are sensitive I would avoid it.**

* * *

_The cold didn't really bother him-he had enough mako in his system to power a city- but the waiting did. Sephiroth was not a patient man. Standing there behind an old tree, he couldn't help but think about the strangeness of the situation, waiting outside a high school at six thirty on a Friday morning, just to see another human being. He almost made a face at the thought until he remembered the particular human he was waiting to see and suddenly his actions didn't seem so nugatory._

_A cold burst of air passed his face, blowing his hood down a little. He growled lightly as he raised a hand to fix it. He was not dressed for work today. No, today Sephiroth had discarded his trademark leather attire for something that would help him blend in better with the rest of the creatures inhabiting the planet. He wore a black cargo pants, steel boots and a baggy black tracksuit top. His glorious silver hair was tied back in a low ponytail and a black hood was used to cover it and to shadow his face._

_There he stood; a dark shadow in the trees. Pale faced with cat-like eyes and venomous lips. The hood caused shadows to form beneath his eyes, mouth and nose, giving him a sinister look._

_A beautiful monster._

_He remembered waking up that morning, how strange it felt when he found himself wanting to get up, how for the first time in his life, he was excited about what the day might bring. _

_Sephiroth's life had always been routine; he had every day planned for him since he was a child and rarely had anything that could really surprise him or bring him to life, as one would say. The Wutian war held some adventure for him, something new and exciting to explore. So he threw himself into it, disappointed when he found that the cold empty feeling in his stomach never once left, no matter how much blood he tried to fill it with._

_For the first time in his life that feeling was gone and Sephiroth was determined to chase these new emotions bubbling within his being. Even if nothing came of it, he would know that he had tried._

_He remembered taking his usual cold shower that morning, how his skin had broken out in goose bumps and sent shivers down his spine. His body felt hypersensitive, like it had woken up from a long slumber and was reacting for the first time to the stimuli of the world._

_The mirror above his sink was normally avoided; he had never wanted to look into the eyes of what he considered to be a corpse, but that morning he had stared intently at his reflection, studying the way his eyes seemed less dull and held more light and how his skin seemed more flushed and less stony. He looked so…human._

_Sephiroth brought a hand up to rub his forehead harshly. Was this boy really responsible for the changes in his world? It was amazing. He had only seen the cherub twice but already the impression Cloud had left was so strong it felt like he had known him before-like their souls were connected._

_The sound of laughter brought him out of his musing and he looked up to see two students making their way through the front gates, laughing about their meaningless lives. He had been standing here for over an hour so far and these were the first two to enter the school grounds. He looked at his watch; seven o' clock seemed to be the starting time as he could see that three more students were making their way towards the school entrance. Standing back further into the shadow of the tree, his green eyes scanned the expanding crowd of teenagers; looking for that halo of golden spikes. _

_He became frustrated when another thirty five minutes passed and still there was no sign of the angel, was he not coming in today? He had contemplated waiting outside the boy's building but had decided against it as he figured he would have only ended up following him here anyway. With a scowl on his face he leaned his head against the rough bark of the tree, dragging his eyes lazily over a crowd of students walking towards the gate. He perked up when his eye caught something bright._

_And there he was, so devastatingly beautiful against the sea of moving bodies, his fleshy lips down-turned in thought, his blond spikes ruffled with the wind and his porcelain skin glowing. His big blue eyes looked tired and his nose was red from the cold. If Sephiroth was a lesser man he may have exclaimed that it was cute-that word however was not in his vocabulary. He watched the boy suddenly laugh and gasp when he was tackled from begin by a small, skinny young girl with dark hair. The two began to chat and Sephiroth could see his face changing so beautifully in different expressions. He was extraordinary._

_Cloud really did look gorgeous. His clothing was simple, blue jeans and a dark jacket, but they wrapped around his small form in and appealing way that made Sephiroth cough lightly to clear his head of impure thoughts; now was not the time._

_He watched as Cloud and the girl walked towards the gate and entered the school. He could no longer see the boy due to the large gate and trees surrounding the building so he decided that it was time to change his position. He wasn't an ordinary human; far from it in fact, so he had many traits which would prove to be helpful for his new… hobby. Inhuman speed, for example, allowed him to move through the trees without being noticed by the students. He moved until he found a very conveniently placed tree just on the left side of the school, from here he had a good view of most of the front of the school grounds through the bars of the gate. _

_He caught sight of Cloud again; he and that girl were standing beside the school parking lot, looking over towards another student dismounting a black motorbike. Sephiroth noticed how Cloud expression seemed to brighten at the sight of this new teen and had to ignore a strange twinge beneath his ribs. He turned his eyes towards the new boy who was taking off his helmet and when he saw that face and raven hair he was sure the teen was familiar, but he couldn't quite place him. Sephiroth mulled it over in his head while he watched their interaction, the two dark haired ones seemed to be teasing Cloud over something and he felt his lips twitch when the blond scowled and punched the other boy in the arm._

_This was what he wanted; to just sit back and watch the angel in his own world, to watch him live his life. This made him…happy. He leaned back against the tree, its leaves ruffling in a symphony of sounds as he watched the teens talk and laugh, the group gradually became bigger and he was glad to see that the boy had a lot of friends and seemed to be well adjusted. He hadn't taken Cloud as one of those thick skulled teenagers and was glad to see that he was correct in his judgment. He was also very relieved to see that the boy didn't seem overly intimate with any of them; he honestly didn't know how he would react to that._

_Riiiing!_

_Sephiroth jumped at the sound of a very loud ringing-not expecting it-. He looked towards the school to see a stampede of students making their way towards the main entrance with sour looks on their faces. He chuckled lightly when he realised that that had been the first thing to catch him off guard since…he couldn't remember._

_He watched Cloud move along with the crowd, his slight frame getting lost amongst the ocean of bodies. Sephiroth narrowed his eyes at that; this vermin should be paving the way for such a being amongst them._

_Blinking, he realised that once Cloud passed through those doors he wouldn't be able to see him for a few hours and this made him frown; he hadn't even thought of that. Sephiroth wanted to see more of the boy; he just wanted to look at him for hours on end, studying his every move and expression. How could he do that in a world where he was only an outsider?_

_The silver haired man took a deep breath, looking towards the sky to get rid of the depressing thoughts circulating in his brain. He stood there for about ten minutes, clearing his thoughts. When all the students were inside he opened his eyes to look back towards the school building thoughtfully and a strange flutter erupted in his chest when he noticed that the building was probably about forty percent glass and that he could see many of the classrooms through the windows. His hope rose, perhaps he didn't have to wait as long as he had thought._

_He raised his arm to grab the branch above his head and using it as leverage, pulled himself up into the tree. Another advantage of being superhuman: gravity defiance. He lunged from the tree and landed smoothly on a thick branch of the neighbouring one. He stopped in a crouch, looking around to see if anyone had noticed the trees ruffling. The place was barren. He jumped stealthily from tree to tree, using his mako enhanced vision to scan the classrooms for the boy. There was always a chance he was in a middle room which would be typical of his luck._

_He stopped harshly on a shaky branch when he unexpectedly saw the blond in one of the lower classrooms, leaning his elbow on his desk with his head held in his cupped hand. He had a pen clutched in his fingers and seemed to be doodling mindlessly on a piece of paper. Sephiroth took note of the classroom, it was just a typical classroom, there was no science or specialised equipment in sight and he found his hopes rising when he caught sight of a brightly decorated poster on the wall._

**_Class 3D_  
_(The best class out there)_  
_Winner of the tidiest homeroom two years running._**

_Homeroom? This was promising. If this was the boy's homeroom then that meant he would spend a good portion of the day here; in clear view just two seats from the window. Sephiroth put an arm against the tree, getting into a comfortable position. He was too far from the window to be seen but his enhanced vision made watching the boy an easy task. He pulled back his hood, letting the gentle breeze caress his face and flow through his silky hair, cooling his scalp. He leaned heavily against the branch behind him and fixed his eyes on the object of his current infatuation. He was going to be there for a while._

* * *

_The weather had changed dramatically in the last few hours, going from biting cold to sweltering hot. Usual Midgar weather. Sephiroth was happy when he heard the bell ring loudly, signalling the end of the school day. He had watched the boy all day long, and was pleased when he had only been absent from the homeroom for three classes, one of which he had spent in the school library; another visible room. He had also gotten to see Cloud interact with his friends at lunchtime when his group sat out by one of the sports fields enjoying the sun. While the rest of them were all talking and joking, Cloud seemed to be absorbed in something he was writing: schoolwork perhaps? When he thought about it, the blond seemed to be scribbling on that pad all day. Was this a hobby of his, drawing? Writing? He had to keep an eye on that._

_Another thing which warranted further inspection was Clouds relationship with that raven haired boy. There was nothing physically pointing to the fact that the two were more than just good friends but Sephiroth saw something. He saw it in the way the older boy put his arm around Cloud, how the two of them were always passing looks and words to each other, he saw how Clouds whole demeanour changed when he was with the other boy; becoming more interested, and he also caught that possessive aura that seemed to radiate from the raven one. Sephiroth had noticed the few suggestive stares directed towards the boy today, it didn't make him angry though; who could blame them? It **did** seem to bother the raven haired teen and Sephiroth noticed how the boy would shoot a dangerous look or tilt his head towards a perpetrator, warning them off. Perhaps he was just protective? Sephiroth doubted it._

_Anyway, the school day was over now and Sephiroth watched as the students burst through the door like the building was on fire. He squinted his eyes, trying to find Cloud in the crowd. To lose him now would be a disaster. He climbed higher into the tree he was residing in, pushing some leaves out of his view._

"_Where are you?" He whispered, scanning the moving crowd intently. He looked over towards the gate; almost sure the boy hadn't passed through yet. His pulse began to quicken as he watched the crowd gradually grow smaller and smaller, noticing some of Clouds friends leaving. "Where are you, Cloud?" He repeated his voice breathy with frustration. The crowd of students dissipated until there were only a few stragglers left._

_Sephiroth's heart sunk-he had missed the boy. He had already left. He knew the way to the boys apartment but he had wanted to walk home with him, see which route he took and if he did anything interesting on the way. He didn't know which apartment the boy lived in either._

_The school doors opening brought him out of his self-pity, he looked over quickly and to his delight the blond was there, making his way down the steps. Sephiroth ran his eyes up and down Clouds form, smirking at what he saw. The boy had changed his cloths (the reason for his late exit) and was now dressed in a loose black wife beater, shorts and white running shoes. Sephiroth sucked in a breath of air harshly; the blond was showing so much skin. Showing **him** his body. His skin was like a pearl; pale with a pink tinge. As he watched the blond make his way towards the school exit, he couldn't help but drag his eyes down the curved back, past that slim waist and onto that perfect posterior. Sephiroth walked two fingers up the bark of the tree, the corner of his lip twitching as he became mesmerised, watching the boy's ass move with every step he took. His breath quickened and his body became heated._

"_Stop it." He berated himself sharply as he closed his eyes tightly and took a few deep breaths to will his arousal away. He heard the school gate creaking and opened his eyes swiftly opened again. Cloud was leaving. With a godlike grace, Sephiroth stood up on the branch and jumped down, his boots not making a sound as he landed lightly on the grass. He commenced to follow Cloud, shadowed by the trees at first and then by walls and buildings as the blond made his way through the streets of Midgar. Nobody noticed him- too absorbed in their own existences to care._

_He became confused when they came to the turn for Briste Street and Cloud walked straight ahead instead of turning. Intrigued, he followed the blond down a ditched lane- excited about this new mystery. Sephiroth stopped when Cloud came to a halt in front of a park/ picnic area. He knew this area, he had done some small missions that led him here as a boy; the grasslands used to be full of monsters._

_Cloud walked over to the gate of the park and opened it; the gate was rusted with age so its hinges screeched loudly from the action. Sephiroth winced when his ultra-sensitive hearing echoed the jarring sound. He stood back behind the ditch as the blond walked over to a patch of grass and put his bag down._

_His eyes widened when the blond began to move his body in stretching motions, reaching down, his thigh muscles straining as he touched his left foot, then his right. He practically ogled the boy as he continued with his stretches, exposing new bits of skin to him when his clothing was pulled upwards or downwards. As arousing as it was however, Sephiroth couldn't help but become angry at the boy for being so naive. Dressed like that in a place like this? He was asking for trouble. Any demented mind could be lurking around._

_Cloud stood up and with a small intake of breath, he took off running. When the boy was a good distance away Sephiroth ventured further into the park-knowing he wouldn't be seen._  
_There was an old children's fun house about thirty feet from him, suitable for bigger children as well as small and Sephiroth knew that from there he would have both a better view and a place to hide. He used his speed to get to the house, climbing up a ladder and sitting on top of it. He was over ten feet from the ground and the front was higher than the back so Cloud wouldn't be able to see him. He crouched down and watched the blond race around the park with impressive speed; Sephiroth thought he could have been a Shinra grunt. He crouched down lower, closing off his mind and just enjoying the view._

_Cloud did three laps around the park and when he stopped he was covered in sweat, breathing heavily and his face was red. Sephiroth thought he could actually smell the boys sweat from there and-without him knowing, his tongue darted out to lick his lips in craving. Gaia, how he wanted to taste that boy, bury his nose in the crook of his neck and just breathe…breath him in. It would be amazing: **they** would be amazing._

_A low growl escaped his throat; he rubbed his forehead against the metal beneath him in irritation. He had to stop getting excited over every little thing the boy did, it was dangerous; both for him and the boy._

_He looked back up at the boy with narrowed eyes, his nails scraping against the metal. Cloud was bent forward, hands on his knees as he tried to regain his breath. Torture. The boy was torturing him._

_He then turned his head sharply when his ears caught the sound of an engine in the distance. A motorcycle was making its way down the road, approaching the park and he could already tell whom its driver was. That boy again. Sephiroth looked back at Cloud and as he expected the boy's face had brightened significantly. That twinge beneath his ribs returned when he saw the adoring look Cloud gave the other when he took off his helmet and ran a hand through his dark hair. The two began conversing; making Sephiroth angry at his inability to hear them-he was too far away for even his enhanced hearing to pick up any words._

_Sephiroth drew his gaze away from Cloud to study the other boy. He was a handsome lad, tanned and muscular. His sculpted physique and charming face made him a perfect specimen of jock boyhood, though Sephiroth still thought he was nothing compared to the beauty beside him._

_Sephiroth squinted his eyes in thought, this boy was definitely familiar. He just couldn't think of why. He brought his thumb to his chin, fingering it lightly as he became lost in thought._

"_Oww!"_

_He arched a slender eyebrow when he saw Cloud pick up a white towel and unexpectedly whip the older one with it. Sephiroth thought that that was a very out of character move for the small boy; he guessed that he had just figured the blond to be gentle and delicate like the angel he saw him as. That was foolish, the blond was a teenage boy and no matter how beautiful he was he was still going to act like just that._

_He became a little edgy when the two boys began to roughhouse with one another on the grass. They were too close, touching and fondling each other in an imitation of foreplay. Oh how he wished he was that boy, that he had Cloud pinned to the ground. He would be rougher with him; he would dominate the blond and show him that he was his god and that he owned him. He would make him feel heaven and hell all in one. This boy was being too gentle with Cloud, tickling and poking him playfully. This wasn't really sexual, it was childish and boyish. Two kids playing a game._

_Sephiroth felt something else then, sadness in his heart. He had never done this as a child. He never had anyone to act foolish with or to share games with. His childhood was always dedicated to study and training and left no time for childish things. He thought about his friends then, Angeal and Genesis. They had sometimes misbehaved as late- teenagers, sneaking into the Shinra training room to fight and wreak havoc. That was the closest to happiness he had ever felt and those times were few and far between. He was jealous of the freedom these two boys possessed._

_The two teens stopped fighting eventually and just lay on the grass. They talked for a while and then they both stood up. Sephiroth watched in rising rage as they two approached the motor bike and Cloud was handed a helmet. He wouldn't be walking home?_

"_Fuck" the word was hissed. That damn boy was getting annoying. He may have to do something about that eventually. Both boys mounted the bike and with a roar of the engine they sped down the ditched road. Once the bike was out of sight Sephiroth stood up on the house slowly, glancing up at the darkening sky. He took a small step forward and then leaped into the air and landed just beside the park gate. His hood fell down with the motion leaving his hair to blow in silver tendrils around his face. He stopped only for a second before he took off running to the top of the road with such speed that the earth beneath his feet went undisturbed. He didn't even slow down as he reached a building, he just bent down then leaped upwards, an arm reaching out to catch a window ledge and he began swinging from window to window like a skilful spider, until he finally reached the roof of the large building. He ran to the edge and without a thought he jumped across to the neighbouring building, repeating the performance another eight times until he reached the desirable destination…Cloud Strife's building._

_He walked calmly to the edge of the roof, his hair was completely loose now and it blew around him like a shining ghost. Thin lips arched up into a smirk when green eyes spotted the bike making its way into the building parking lot. They came to a halt and he could see Cloud hopping of the bike and removing the borrowed helmet. The two talked for a minute and then to Sephiroth's delight they said their goodbyes to each other and the dark haired boy started up his bike, revved it and sped away. Cloud watched him for a minute and then he re-shouldered his bag and headed for his apartment._

_Sephiroth threw his legs over the edge of the building and landed on the balcony underneath. He put his hand on the rail and looked down at the boy below him. The balcony he was on ran the whole way across the building and was attached to lower ones by stairs and elevators. He watched the blond below climb two sets of stairs and head left down the second story balcony. Sephiroth mimicked the boy's footsteps, gliding along the balcony at the boys pace. He scanned the area, glad to see that it was empty and that many of the apartments were vacant. That would help him. The boy's footsteps stopped and Sephiroth could hear the distinct sound of keys being shoved in a lock, a door opening and then closing. He waited a few moments to make sure Cloud was gone before he swung himself down three stories and landed on the blonde's floor. He once again checked to make sure he wasn't seen and then turned to the door he was sure Cloud lived behind._

_Number 40. The boy lived behind this door. How could such an ugly place like this hold such a gem? Well, most crystals were dug from dirt. He brought a hand to the door and lightly traced the rough wood, some green paint chipping beneath his fingernails. He took a cautious step towards it-almost expecting it to suddenly open- and slowly pressed his ear against the cold wood. He closed his eyes and listened intently, he could hear everything that was going on in the apartment._

"_Mom, are you feeling better?" Cloud's voice. That was right; his mother was suffering from Geostigma. The boy was in for some heartache. "Hey, can I bring you anything? Water?" Cloud was such a good boy._

"_Oh honey, I'm fine. Just a little tired is all." The raspy voice which must have been Sky's answered. "Come talk to me Cloud. How was your day?" He heard a bed creaking; it was probably the blond sitting down on the corner of hers._

"_It was fine, I don't have much homework" Cloud answered softly. Sephiroth loved the sound of his voice; it was so soothing and warm. His words were well-pronounced although there was hesitancy to it, as though he feared saying something wrong. "Oh, I got an A in my 'religion and the Lifestream' project" The boy stated in a nonchalant way, though Sephiroth could tell he was proud. Sephiroth was pleased, he liked perfection._

"_Oh honey tha-" But Sky's excited reaction was cut short when she was thrown into a coughing fit. It sounded bad, like she was trying to bring up her own organs. Sephiroth's expression didn't change though; he didn't care about her._

"_Mom… I'll go get you water okay?" He heard Clouds slightly cracked voice and then footsteps. He heard the boy open a fridge door, take out a bottle and walk back into the room. The sound of harsh swallowing followed and then Sky whispered in a raspy voice._

"_Honey, I think I'm going to have a little rest. Okay? I want to hear more about that A later though."_

"_Of course, you look tired. I'm gonna go make something to eat" Cloud replied. Sephiroth heard the blond close the bedroom door softly and then make his way to another room. _

_He expected him to head the same way as he had to get the water but was surprised when the blonde walked to the left instead. He heard another door open and then close and gathered that the Cloud had entered his bedroom. He couldn't hear the boy any more, the room being on the other side of the apartment. He sighed in frustration and stood back from the door. _

_Was there a back to this building?_

_Sephiroth quickly made his way to the roof again and looked over the edge. His eyes widened in mad satisfaction. The back of this building was a complete dump. Garbage, graffiti, ruined vehicles and other disgusting articles riddled the place. The pleasant part however, was that this side of the complex also had balconies, albeit broken and unused ones. He jumped down all the way to the second floor and pulled himself onto the ledge. There were windows here, one from each apartment. His heartbeat quickened as he walked over to the window for Cloud's number. Staying to the left and using the shadows as a cover he peered inside the glass and couldn't stop the brilliant smile that formed on his lips. This was Clouds room. He was staring into the angel's most personal space. This was incredible; he couldn't believe how lucky he was. He would have settled with just listening through the walls and watching him at school but now…he could watch him in his own bedroom?_

_ Sephiroth was happy._

_He stopped smiling when he looked at Cloud, he had been so caught up in the fact that he could see the boys room that he forgotten to look at the boy. Cloud was kneeling on his single bed, a book held in one hand and the quilt fisted in the other. Sephiroth couldn't see his whole face because he was turned slightly away, but he could see the tear drops glinting in the light as they ran down the boy's cheek. He could hear the raspy coughing in the background and knew that that was what Cloud was listening too as well._

_Sephiroth frowned. The boy looked so different now than he did at school, was his bright and plucky persona false or was this just a weak moment? He would just have to wait and see._

_Cloud sat there for a while, tracing a small finger around the pattern on his bedspread while letting the tears run freely down his face. His mouth was turned downwards in a baby-sad frown and he sniffled occasionally. Sephiroth figured that twenty minutes passed before the blond sat up straighter and brought a hand up to rub at his eyes and push away his bangs. _

_The blond placed the book on his bed and swung his legs out from under him until his socked feet met the carpeted floor. Sephiroth could hear the floor board creaking beneath the boy as he made his way to his door and exited the room. He was annoyed at this and decided to wait and see if the blond would come back soon. He could faintly hear the sound of a skillet heating, a fridge door opening and a package scrunching. The boy was making something to eat. He listened for a while-feeling hungry himself, and smiled when the blond returned to his room with a toasted sandwich on a blue plate in one hand and a glass of milk in the other. _

_Cloud placed the items down on his bedside locker and made himself comfortable against the headboard of his bed. He picked up the book he was holding earlier and began to read while taking small bites of his sandwich. The whole scene was adorable, the blond looked so comfortable and cosy that Sephiroth suddenly got the urge to crush him to his chest and never let go._

_He watched Cloud read, his face mimicking the emotions of the characters adorably and he couldn't believe that this boy was so sad just a half an hour ago. Perhaps the blond just needed to let some emotions escape now and then._

_The night flew by as Sephiroth watched Cloud read some more, do his homework, get a late evening snack and finally head for the bathroom to get ready for bed. Sephiroth had to contain his disappointment as Cloud brought his bedclothes with him to the bathroom and got changed there. The sight of the youth returning clad in blue chocobo pyjama bottoms and a white T-shirt made up for it though. Sephiroth shuffled back quickly when the blond walked over and closed his curtains. He frowned, disappointed that his show was over. He heard the blonde's bed creaking and the flick of a switch as the room grew dark. Waiting a few minutes, he slowly walked back to the window but he couldn't see a thing through the thick material of the curtains. He brought a hand up to the glass, fingering it slowly and silently. He kept his body to the left so that his shadow wasn't visible through the curtains._

"_Goodnight Cloud" He whispered, listening to the steady breathing inside the room. He walked back to the edge of the balcony and gave one last look back towards the window before jumping. Today had been a good day. He had gotten to see more than he had hoped and he felt that his earlier belief that there was something drawing him to this boy had been confirmed. He was just… perfect. But in an interesting way that appealed to him._

_ There was so much more to come._

* * *

_Every beat of the music grated into his being, the buzzing echoing off every corner of his mind. His head swam with the disgusting laughter and obscenely loud voices. Sephiroth was irritated._

_It was Saturday night and here he stood, outside the mayor of Shrewsbury's private residence, watching a bunch of adolescent idiots get so drunk or high that they'd either throw up or pass out._

_He had not been able to watch the boy as much as he had wanted that day due to work issues-an exploded Mako retainer to be exact- so when he finally arrived at the boy's house at eight thirty it became apparent that the boy was going somewhere. First of all the blonde's wet hair and red eyes indicated that he had been in the shower as well as the fact that he was wearing a blue fluffy bathrobe. Sephiroth had watched as the boy had spent some long minutes deciding what to wear, picking up and discarding several different ensembles until he was satisfied with his choice. He was once again disappointed when the boy had gone back into the bathroom with the clothes, a toothbrush and a hairbrush. He waited patiently until the blond emerged ten minutes later, looking nothing short of stunning. He was dressed in a tight black shirt with black jeans-the black really accentuating the boys white face and yellow hair. He watched as Cloud sat down and put on a pair of shoes before he walked over to his dressing table and picked up a silver item which was placed around his neck._

_He remembered how frustrated he had been when the blond sat down in front of his mirror and had frowned, picking and prodding at himself for a while. He had wanted to shake the boy, to drill it into him that he was perfect and that this self-critique was foolish._

_Eventually, he had followed the boy to his destination and ended up here, sitting once more in a tree, looking in through a huge glass bay window as the boy sat in a small group with his friends, drinking alcohol and having a good time. The brunette boy beside Cloud had collected him at his complex and driven him here. Sephiroth had thought that maybe the two were intimately involved but was happy to see that it wasn't the case. He was less happy to see that the raven haired young man and Cloud were sitting quite close and seemed to be enjoying each other's company **very **much. He was sure something was going on between them but decided not to act until he had more conviction. He stared at the blond as he gradually became more talkative and giddy with alcohol. The blond and his friends seemed to be more mature than most of the people at this party, even while inebriated, which was re-assuring because Sephiroth was becoming increasingly disgusted by the sexual and bodily displays going on in plain view of everyone. He twitched his hand in craving for his Masamune._

_This whole scene annoyed him. He wanted to say that it was just because of the idiotic behaviour of the teens but that wasn't the whole story. Everyone here looked so care free, so young and unaware. This was another thing he had missed out on, the foolishness of youth. He had never attended a party like this and had never just spent a teenage night drinking and acting reckless with his friends. It made him feel strange, perhaps nostalgic to see what he had missed out on. He and Angeal and Genesis used to go out together, but it was never like this. The three of them have had hectic lives from a young age, and could never throw sense to the side and become oblivious to the world like this. It had always been strained for them, especially as Genesis grew older and more difficult. He was gone now, and so he tried to keep memories of the man from his life. All of them. _

_Two hours into the night the blond suddenly stood up and Sephiroth watched curiously as Cloud made his way to into the hallway, sheepishly apologising to the people he bumped into (although it wasn't really his fault). Sephiroth could see everything that was happening as most of the rooms in this house possessed some extravagant window display. He saw the blond walk over towards a room which he guessed was a downstairs bathroom and chuckled as Cloud opened the door and quickly closed it, his face turning a shade of bright pink. The blond looked around panicked for a minute and then grabbed some of his front locks and turned to make his way upstairs, probably in search for another restroom._

_This house, like most in the area, had a backyard canapé and a slanted roof so as the blond made his way up the stairs, Sephiroth walked to the edge of the branch, jumped onto the canapé and quietly made his way onto the roof. He stayed low as he climbed up to a roof top window which looked down into the house. All he could see was the hall of the upstairs from here. He looked over and noticed with disdain that all the other roof windows had blinds covering them. He leaned down and spotted the slightly drunken Cloud coming up the stairs and walking down the hall. The blond turned into the second room on the left and Sephiroth was left to wait for him to return. He placed one hand firmly on the roof while the other was used to keep his silver hair back as he looked down in anticipation for the blonds return. It was strange really; to go to all this trouble just to see the blond walk by. He could have just waited in the tree for the blond to return downstairs._

_The sound of footsteps caused him to turn his head and he saw another blond boy stumbling down the hall. He didn't think much of it until he saw the boy turn into the room the blond was in, closing the door behind him. What was this? Was it a coincidence? Was it an arrangement between the two? After about five minutes Sephiroth grew impatient, his fingers dancing on the tile nervously as he waited for something to happen. Gaia he wished that he could see what was happening in there. He couldn't hear anything due to the music and he grew increasingly frustrated when fifteen minutes passed and there was no sign of either of them. Was Cloud a little slut? Was he in there giving himself to that boy? His breath became heavy._

_The bedroom door bursting open was unexpected and Sephiroth's eyes widened when he saw Cloud frantically running down the hall, a look of panic on his snowy face. The other blond rushed out and in a rage he ran after the blond, catching him and throwing him backwards. Sephiroth saw red. He raised a hand, ready to smash the glass beneath him and save the boy. _

_He watched as the two talked, as Cloud breathed deeply and tried to stop the other boy who was leaning over him; intimidating. The older blond was in a state, Sephiroth could see, as he laughed and grew angry in the same heartbeat. Then the dirty blond did something to seal his death sentence, he roared in the startled blonde's ear and brought him into a bruising kiss._

_How. Dare. He._

_Sephiroth's eyes narrowed as he clenched his fist once more ready to strike the glass. He brought his hand down fast. His fist stopped a hairs breath from the glass._

_He watched with mixed feelings as the raven haired boy ran down the hall and lunged at the scumbag. There was a scuffle, panicked voices and then the blond was unconscious. He looked at Clouds face but his disadvantaged view-point didn't allow him to get a good look. Cloud was holding the others are tightly._

_Sephiroth looked at the darker boy, his features twisted with rage and then something clicked: Angeal. This boy was Angeal's nephew, he had met him only twice but he knew now that that was who he was. What was his name? Jack?…Zack? That was it. Zackary Fair. _

_He frowned, this complicated things. He couldn't touch his friend's nephew._

_He narrowed his eyes when he saw the beaten blond on the floor begin to stir. He clenched his jaw as the piece of dirt coughed and struggled to his feet while talking to the two boys. He was surprised when he saw the look in Cloud's eyes; not anger but pity. Cloud looked on sadly as the older blond made his way down the hall slowly. Zack stood with a serious look in his face but didn't move, seemingly satisfied by his departure. Sephiroth was not so forgiving._

_He gave one last look towards the blond. He wasn't harmed, would be okay with Zack._

_Sephiroth had something he needed to do._

* * *

Shit, shit, shit. What the fuck did I just do? Oh Gaia, how did I let that happen? Everybody's looking at me, okay I need to get out of here, I need to go home.

"Seifer, what happened?" Oh fuck, Vossler.

"Fuck off!" I need to get out of here.

"What the fuck is your problem man?" He just won't quit will he? I push him away and say.

"I'll see you tomorrow man, I need to go." Okay, come on. Just get out the door.

I make my way through the crowd, my heart is beating as I finally make it to the door and out to the garden. What the fuck did I just do? What's wrong with me? Shit my head is killing me.

_You're just like him._

Shut up. Shut up. I'm not him; I'm not anything like him. I would've stopped. I can't even remember.

I make my way through Tifa's gate and onto the road, my whole body is one big pain at this stage, I taste blood in my mouth and feel the swollen skin around my eyes. Where the fuck am I going? My house is miles from here. Wait, do I want to go home? To that place? It's not a home. It's hell.

_What you deserve._

No. I don't deserve that. I'm not like them. That bitch and that dead piece of shit. I'm better than them.

_Why did you do it then?_

No. I didn't mean to. I was drunk…and high. I don't even know Cloud but I got nothing against him. Why would I do that to him? I would've stopped. I don't know what's wrong with me. Leon…

I make my way down the road, passing all those big fucking houses with their nice cars and cut grass. Fuck them, they're not any better than us. I walk for a half an hour, leaving the suburbs and entering an abandoned part of town. Does anyone live here? I don't care. I need to be alone; I don't want to be bad anymore. I want my bed. I don't want to go back there.

"Fuck!" I roar into the open air, kicking a trash can. Oh Gaia, the fucking pain. My body is shot. Fucking Zack Fair. I think my knee is out of joint. I'm going crazy. I want to… I don't even know. I just want to be better. I want to be happy. I can't be like this anymore. A scumbag. Leon wouldn't…

I sit down against a wall, cradling my bloody head in my hands. Fuck I'm in pain! Fair can really throw a punch.

**_He _**_could really throw a punch too._

Shut up. I don't care about him anymore. He's gone.

_Never gone_.

"Uhhhh" I'm groaning? Gaia I'm so fucked. This is my wakeup call. I need to stop this. I need to be a better person. I will.

"Hurt, are we?" I jump at the sound of a new voice. Who the fuck else is here?

"Fuck off." I spit back. Probably just a homeless looser or something.

"Don't you dare speak to me like that. Rodent." Shit. I look up and feel a drum of fear when I see the person in front of me. A figure; over six feet tall and completely covered in black. Who the fuck was this?

"Look man, I'm sorry if this is your turf. I'll just get going." I better get going, this place is creeping me out. I'll call a cab or something.

"Stand up." What the fuck? This guy sounds pissed.

"Okay man," I say, standing up slowly. Gaia my ribs are sore. "I said I was going."

"No you're not." What the fuck is his problem,

"Look, fucker" I start but my voice gets caught in my throat when he raises his hand and I see, to my absolute terror, that he's holding a knife glinting in the moonlight. I raise my hands in surrender. "Hey man, I don't want any trouble. I'm just going to leave," but he doesn't move.

"You don't want any trouble?" He asks calmly and I nod my head. Damn, my whole body's shaking. "Then perhaps you should have thought about that before you touched him." What the fuck? Who is this joker?

"Who?" I whisper, licking my lips.

"WHO?" He bellows and I jump back in fright. My head is pounding. I just want to go home now. I shakily back up as he walks towards me. I can't see his face. "Weren't you at a party tonight? Didn't you follow a poor unsuspecting boy into a room and try to force yourself on him. You pushed him against the wall. You hurt him. You _kissed him._" The last words were dripping with venom. I felt bile rise in my throat, my body felt cold and I could hear my heart pounding in my ears. How did he know this? What was this guy? Was he human?

"N-no that's not what happened" I stutter but he just laughs and walks towards me until my body is crushed against the wall. He brings the knife up to my face and I really start to panic. Fuck, a fucking psychopath. "P...please man. It was an accident. I didn't mean t-"

"An accident?" He laughs mockingly. I can feel my lips tremble, the tears running freely down my face like a little pussy. "I don't think so." He whispers menacingly. I don't have time to react as he lunges forward and puts an arm around my neck. Catching me in a headlock. I can't breathe, my body feels numb. He's strong, fucking seriously strong.

"Please man" I beg as he starts walking towards the entrance of the old building beside us. I begin kicking and screaming, digging my heels into the ground but it's useless. "No, no no. Help. Somebody help me." I shout. Drool is running down my mouth but I don't care. I feel sick. He pulls me up four flights of stairs until to my absolute terror we end up on the top of the building. Oh no. Gaia help me.

"Please. Please. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what I did." I beg desperately, too afraid to be humiliated. He roughly lets me go and I fall to the ground in the pathetic heap that I am.

"What's your name?" He asks me calmly. He's so weird. Calm and psychotic all in one. I have to do something or this freak will kill me.

"S-Seifer." I answer timidly. Too afraid to lie. I wipe my nose with my jacket as I watch him walk over to me.

"Seifer. You have committed a sin tonight." He says and I sob desperately. Fuck, I'm such a fucking coward. "Do you have a phone?" I don't answer. "Don't make me repeat myself, scum!" He hisses and walks closer to me. Now's my chance.

As he bends down to grab me I bring up my elbow and slam it into his face. He reels back and I clumsily scramble to my feet, ignoring my aching body as I stumble towards the roof door. I smile when almost reach it but that expression turns distorted when he's suddenly in front of me. This guy isn't human. My eyes widen in fear as he grabs my hair and lifts me up off the ground. He waits calmly as I curse and kick and scream at him until I become too tired and just give up. The pain in my scalp is unbearable and after he lets me drop to the floor I feel bile rise in my throat and I puke up what feels like the entire contents of my stomach. I place my hands on the ground and dry heave. I can feel him walking back over to me and bending down but I don't have the energy to move now, let alone fight.

He reaches into my pocket with a gloved hand and takes out my phone. I begin to sob again as I see him flip open the phone and do something. Once he's done he walks over to an electricity box and places the phone on it. I try to get up and run but my body can't move. It's so sore, my fucking knee. I just want to go home to bed. I want to get better. I don't want to be here.

He walks back over to me and grabs my hair again. I scream as he pulls me up by my burning scalp, begging and pleading for forgiveness. Oh Gaia, help me. My body breaks out in a sweat as he begins walking over to the edge of the roof. No, no, no, no, no. NO.

"Please" I scream. "I'll be good. I don't want this. I don't want to die." I cry desperately but he says nothing. Who is he? What the fuck does he want? We reach the edge of the building and I become still. Sweat, blood and tears running down my face. I can't even breath as he stands me right on the edge, his grip in my hair is what's keeping me from plunging to my death. The wetness sliding down my thighs is ignored as I try to fight. "Please?" I gasp. I don't want to die. I want to go home. I'm afraid.

He looks at me for a moment and for the first time I can see his glowing green eyes through the darkness of the hood. What the fuck is he? He stays quiet and I feel hope rise in my stomach at his next words.

"Are you truly sorry?"

"Yes. I swear to fuck-"

"You regret what you've done?"

"Y-yes."

"it was the worst mistake you've ever made?"

"Yes. Yes please."

"…Good."

He let go.


	6. VI

**Disclaimer: Don't own Final Fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

* * *

"Suicide." Cloud slammed the paper down on his dressing table, the sound lingering in the small room for seconds afterwards. Zack raised his brows and pursed his lips, breathing softly through his nose.

"Yeah," he breathed out, running a hand through his raven locks, "that's what their saying Cloudy. Why're you so surprised. I mean that's what it was. So…" This caused Cloud to turn around sharply, eyes widening in disbelief as he regarded the other slouched on his bed.

"Why am I..? Zack. It's our fault." He cried, throwing his hands out to each side of him in emphasis. Zack shook his head, chuckling darkly.

"Our fault?" He repeated as Cloud nodded angrily. "Cloud, the guy had problems. Really bad stuff goin on."

"Yeah but…You saw him last night Zack. He was a mess. We should have done something." Cloud insisted. He lowered his head so his blond bangs covered his eyes and fiddled with some items on his dressing table. Zack sighed softly and scratched the bridge of his nose with his thumbnail.

"Eh, I don't really think we could have done anything blondie. I mean, I could have let him finish what he started but I don't think that's what you wanted, was it?"

"No." The younger answered quickly, shooting the other an irritated look. "Of course not Zack. I just think we should've made him see a doctor or something. Especially after the fight you two had." He said the last part quieter, afraid of sounding accusing.

"Cloud, I think the last thing either of us were thinking involved Seifer's welfare. Besides, what good would a doctor have done?" Zack argued. "I mean, they don't fix those kind of things. Head thingys." He twirled his finger around his own head. He really didn't get why Cloud was so upset. Sure, he felt sorry for what Seifer did but he didn't see why the blond was blaming himself so much. The boy's actions the previous night were inexcusable and proved that there was something wrong with Seifer's mentality already.

"Well yeah but… maybe his head was messed up from… he was bleeding a lot, I mean." Cloud said hesitantly, looking at the other through lowered lids. He knew what happened wasn't Zack's fault but a part of him couldn't help but remember the way the boy had acted the night before. He was so brutal; hitting and punching Seifer like a madman.

"Ahh, I see," Zack said slowly, clucking his tongue while looking towards the ceiling. He clenched his jaw bone and looked back at the blond. "You're not really blaming us as much as you're blaming _me._" He stated, looking at the blond with a raised brow. Cloud sighed softly, fiddling with the hem of his shirt.

"I don't blame you Zack. I just…he was drunk and injured and upset. I saw his eyes, they were so…empty. We let him leave like that and now he's dead." Saying it out loud, Cloud realised how real this all was. He stomach felt full and heavy and he wanted this all to just go away. Someone died. Because of him?

Zack stood up from the bed, the old floor boards squeaked beneath his feet as he walked the short distance to the blond. He felt a little bad about getting angry, this whole thing seemed to be weighing heavily on his friend and he wasn't really helping at all. He was a bit shaken himself.

"Look," he said, ruffling the blonde's hair affectionately, "I get what you're saying chocobo-head, but you gotta use that big brain of yours properly. He attacked _you_. I stopped it before it got too bad but if I didn't things could have been a lot different now, y'know? How would you have felt then? Seifer wasn't evil but he wasn't gonna get invited to any tea-parties either. Anyone who would attack someone like that would have to have reeeeeeaaaaaaal bad stuff goin on up there. What he did really had nothing to do with you. I beat him pretty bad, but not enough to cause anything serious. I'm not that strong, though I will forgive you for thinking so because … well I'm a specimen of manliness." Zack breathed heavily, having forgotten to during his rant. Cloud sighed, dragging his eyes up to meet the other's.

"Yeah." He said softly. "I guess you're right Zack. It all still sucks though." Zack gave the boy a sad smile, placing an arm around his shoulder.

"I know." Zack mumbled as Cloud slouched unhappily against him. "It does suck."

That was the conversation Cloud and Zack had had the morning after Seifer Almasy lost his life. The media, as predicted, ate up the _tragic_ story like a swarm of flies on a festering piece of flesh. The following weeks were filled with theories and stories on what could have caused Seifer to end his life like that. The dominating one was that the teen's parents were to blame; one was an abusive alcoholic and the other an ego driven schizophrenic.

The boy had apparently been dealing with an upsetting amount of mental abuse and pressure which caused a mental breakdown of sorts. The night of the party he was high on drugs and alcohol and had gotten into a fight with a peer. He had left the party in a dazed state, walked calmly to the top of a building a few miles down, wrote a message saying 'I'm sorry' on his cell phone and threw his body from the roof. The teens who attended the party were all questioned; including Cloud and Zack. Cloud had been worried about Zack as the boy was questioned the most regarding his brawl with the teen and was temporally regarded as a person of interest. The autopsy cleared Zack eventually and the investigation was cleared up, suicide being the final and most obvious verdict.

It was now two months since the incident and both the media and the school had begun to move on. It was harder for some than others but Cloud was sad to see that there was no one who was completely devastated by Seifer's passing, even his parents. How could someone be alive for seventeen years and then just…disappear? Like a drop of water which dried and left no mark.

Anyway, life had continued and Cloud was now stood behind his usual post at Dilly Dallies, working his Saturday shift. He tended to work a lot of weekends lately, having no real desire to go out anymore. It was now three thirty and his shift finished at four. That would have been okay but it appeared as though it had been three thirty for a _long _time now. Why was the end of a shift always the longest?

The blond drummed his fingers nonchalantly on the counter, moving his eyes around the room dreamily as his head bobbed with the movement.

Beep beep.

Cloud reached into his pocket and retrieved his cell phone which tickled his hand as it vibrated. He pressed the answer button and placed it to his ear.

" 'low?" He mumbled into the device.

"Well 'low' to you too chocobo-head?" Zack's unmistakable voice filtered through the other end.

"Oh, Zack. Hey."

"Hn that's a little better, you really have to work on your manners y'know. So what are you uuup to?"

"I'm working now. Why?" Cloud replied, brightening up a bit.

"Awe damn! I just finished some training with Angeal and I was gonna see if you wanted to hang out. Maybe get something to eat… I'm so lonely you see…" Zack drifted off suggestively.

"Well…I'm finished at four so-"

"Four? Yay, that's only like twenty minutes away. Why didn't you say that Spiky? Bold boy keeping me in suspense. I'll meet you outside the store then. Okay bu bye." Zack interrupted the teen happily.

"Uh… Okay. That's fine." Cloud blinked. Zack gave a another quick goodbye and hung up. Cloud sighed and looked at the clock. Nineteen minutes.

* * *

"I swear she was going to just jump you." Cloud laughed as the two of them made their way up the steps to Zack's apartment. The older teen let out a shout of laughter and put his hand up in mock defence.

"I know. I'm pretty sure she dropped that fork on purpose, trying to entice me with all her charms and lovelies. Or maybe just so she could lean down and grab my knee like that. Oh, don't get any ideas now feather-head." He widened his eyes at the memory and then narrowed them at Cloud. "Guess that's what happens when you're an amaaaazing person, hnn." He drawled, brushing away an invisible speck of dust from his shoulder.

"Oh!" Cloud snorted, looking sideways at the other. "Must be hard. Huh."

"I felt violated. So pretty and with all of these pervs everywhere." Zack joked in a girlish voice as he dug in his pocket for his keys. Cloud sighed and looked away again, smiling.

Zack had collected Cloud outside the shop and the two of them had gone to 'Migelo's Place' for some food and then to hang around for almost three hours. Cloud had checked in with his mom to discover she was heading to bed and seemed fine so he decided to stay out at Zack's for a couple of hours. He hadn't been there in a while after all.

Zack opened his front door and ushered Cloud inside before entering himself. The apartment was nice and spacious with white walls and dark wooden furniture. The place was in a good part of town and only had three apartments attached per row. Cloud was pretty embarrassed about just how much better this place was compared to his but had decided a long time ago to just get over it. He knew Zack didn't care about his socioeconomic background anyway. He took off his shoes at the door as usual and entered the living room.

"Drink?" Zack offered as he made his way to the kitchen.

"Kay." Cloud nodded. He sat down on the plush leather couch, feeling conscious of his old and probably dirty clothing. Everything was so nice here, he didn't fit properly.

"Here you go sir." Zack smirked, carrying two bottles of Budweiser over two the couch.

"I didn't think you meant alcohol, Zack." Cloud said sheepishly as the other just shrugged and handed him a bottle before letting himself fall back onto the couch, next to the blond.

"Why not? It's Saturday and we're not doing anything tomorrow." Zack reasoned as Cloud tilted his head. "Plus Angeal's working late tonight so it would be a crime _not_ to take advantage of this rare and wonderful opportunity." He continued in response to Cloud's patronising look. The blond looked at him for a minute before sighing and sinking back into the couch.

"I guess so." He said as he took a swig. Zack made a 'ah ha' noise and took one of his own.

"It's weird. The last time I drank this was-" Cloud said softly, running his finger around the ring of the bottle

"Hey. That's all over now Cloudy. We have to move on from all that, though I know it's hard for you to not be tortured and troubled over something Cheerful little thing that you are." Zack said, moving his head to try making eye contact with the boy. "Cheers?" He held out his bottle, waiting for the blonde's reaction. Cloud searched the others eyes, he knew he was bringing the mood down but he couldn't help it. That night was engraved in his head and every little thing reminded him of it. He had to stop. Zack was right, it wasn't their fault and they had to move on. He snapped back to reality and smiled softly.

"Yeah. Cheers." He said as the bottles clinked together.

The two sat and talked for about an hour until they heard the front door open and then close.

"Ohhh, no." Zack muttered, eyes gong wide. Cloud sat up quickly and watched as Zack jumped into the air and hurriedly gathered up the empty bottles from the coffee table. "Bad, bad, bad, bad." He flittered about the room like a chocobo with his ass on fire.

"Zack?" He whispered but the other just waved him off and looked at the bottle in his hand before grabbing it from him.

"He told me not to drink tonight. Or to touch _his_ beer." Zack whispered as he rushed into the kitchen. Cloud blinked, his hand poised as thought he was still holding the bottle. He looked over as the door to the living room opened and a very tall, muscular and dark haired man walked in.

"…Hi Angeal." Cloud said awkwardly, opening his erect hand to form a wave.

"Cloud. It's good to see you. How have you been?" The other replied not unkindly. Cloud relaxed a little.

"Fine. Me and Zack were just-"

"Drinking my beer and staining my furniture." The man stated. Cloud clamped his mouth shut, looking away timidly. "Don't worry. I think I know whose idea this is." Angeal winked at Cloud who raised his brows. Zack picked this moment to enter the room, smiling at his uncle.

"Oh hi Angeal! I didn't realise you were here. You're so stealthy and all that." He raised an eyebrow to hide his tense façade. Angeal cocked his head and folded his arms.

"Yeah," he said in his deep voice, "mission got cancelled so I came home early. Are you glad?"

"Well," Zack said carefully, trying to ameliorate the situation. "Of course I'm glad to see my faaaaaavourite uncle." Angeal looked at him for a minute before sighing.

"Well then. I had a long day. I think I'll go get myself a beer." He made a step towards the kitchen before Zack jumped in front of him.

"No." He practically shouted and Angeal faked a enquiring look. "I mean, you've had a hard day. Why don't you sit down and I'll get you a beer. Go on unc, sit. Relax." Zack said smoothly and Cloud had to hold in a laugh. Angeal blew some hair out of his eyes and pretended to consider his nephew.

"Alright Zachery, that sounds nice. It would be great if you could throw in a sandwich with that and… Cloud, do you want a coke?"

"Sure." The blond bit his lip to contain the chuckle tickling the back of his throat.

"Good. We'll be here then Zack." The older man narrowed his eyes and walked to the couch, motioning for Cloud to follow him.

"Great." Zack bit out through gritted teeth. He smiled innocuously he made his way out of the room.

* * *

_Hmm, the military just wasn't what it used to be. Ever since the war finished there really wasn't much illegal activity going on; internal or external. It was mostly small movements and street crime that had to be monitored now and that tended to make the job somewhat… dull. Being sent out on missions used to hold some danger, some mystery. You used to never know what was going to happen, what enemy you would be facing or if you would even return alive._

_Not anymore._

_Dull, standard, routine assignments is all they were now. Futile errands that any fool could perform. He was Sephiroth. The great general Sephiroth! And he was getting sick of these tasks. He was getting sick of everything really. He was beginning to crave an end to this routine. To throw a cloth over this birdcage and start anew._

_Yes, Sephiroth had been thinking lately. What if he were to leave this place and never return? It would be simple enough, he could get a transfer at work or maybe even quit altogether. Buy a house in a secluded area, away from the spotlight, and just be free. Free from everything he had been forced into all his life; duty, obligations, discipline… depression._  
_Sephiroth pondered this as he made his way up the steps leading to the second story balcony, his footsteps getting lost in the melancholy music of the raindrops. He had had a bad day, his eyes were unusually heavy with lethargy and his muscles ached from having just returned from an overnight mission in the freezing south of Wutia. It wasn't a demanding mission; a small terrorist group trying to mix a corrosive chemical with the iron used to build Shinra equipment in order to slowly erode it, but it was the lack of sleep, mobility and patience that made it an intolerable experience._

_Upon arriving home he had instantly decided he needed something to lift his foul temper and this had led to him to where he was now. Walking that familiar street, past those familiar buildings and up those familiar steps leading to a familiar balcony. The journey was like an impulse now. His muscles had committed it to memory and he was free to just let his mind wander as his body controlled him. No one ever saw him, he had stopped scaling the buildings and climbing rooftops now and instead just walked calmly along the narrow streets, an invisibility materia making his body transparent to the world. Yes, working for Shinra really did have its perks._

_Sephiroth had been following Cloud Strife for two months and three days now and he had never been happier. Every day he was with the teen brought them closer together and that, he knew, was an extraordinary privilege. Cloud was a beautiful individual. The General had learned so much about the blond from their time together, like how even though he was small and graceful he was surprisingly clumsy and spacey. He often had to stifle a laugh as he watched the youth bump into someone or trip over something or knock something down and become flustered. His face became flushed and his eyes would dart nervously around, probably to see if anyone noticed his blunder. It was adorable._

_He had also discovered that the blond was aspiring to become a writer. The notebook he had seen him doodling in that first day was frequently used by the blond to take down notes and ideas during the day and he also attended a creative writing course every Wednesday, which he seemed to enjoy. Sephiroth didn't know what the boy wrote about but he had gathered from scattered conversations that his home life factored into the hobby somehow. He vowed that someday he would read that notebook._

_He loved to watch the youth write, to see how his pretty face would follow the emotions of his words. Sometimes he would wrinkle his nose and snarl and other times he would widen his eyes as though he were surprised. It was very amusing to watch and he was sure that the boy would be mortified if he knew anyone was. Sephiroth didn't care._

_The blonde's relationship with Angeal's nephew stayed much the same as it had two months ago: a close, non-romantic friendship. Sephiroth still kept an eye on it, just in case anything unfavourable was to happen. He honestly didn't know what he would do if something **did** happen though. The boy was his close friend's nephew and he knew Angeal cared a great deal for him. Would he be capable of hurting that person?_

_Hopefully the problem would never arise._

_He hadn't really gotten to see Cloud interact in a social setting since the night of the party, when he had disposed of that vermin. The blond seemed to be feeling a great deal of guilt over the event- something Sephiroth scoffed at. That boy was a scumbag. He had attacked Cloud, tried to ruin his life just to satisfy his own need. Like an animal! A filthy beast that was put on the planet to destroy all that was good. Why would the blond be sad to see him gone?_

_Sephiroth released a breath, Cloud was so innocent. That was another thing he had learned. He had watched as Cloud had walked obliviously past people who ogled and commented on him, and never once turned his head or frowned at them. The blond seemed to be a bit of an enigma in the school; the boy everyone wanted but no one could have, and he didn't even know it. That kind of trust could be dangerous; taken advantage of. And just like Sephiroth had done on that faithful night, he would make sure the boy was protected. It was his calling._

_The real highlight of his time with Cloud Strife though, was the first time that angelic body had been revealed to him._

_As mentioned before, the blond had taken to staying in since the news of that Gaia-forsaken thugs death, and this meant Sephiroth got to spend hours watching the boy in his own bedroom, something which pleased him very much. He could see that Cloud was upset about the fatality but he didn't linger on it. He had no reason to feel guilt over fulfilling his duty after all._

_He had been standing outside the boys window on one of these nights, just watching Cloud live from his vantage point, when he was awarded by the goddess herself. The boy's mother must have been sick, as Cloud had returned to his bedroom with a vile green substance coating the left shoulder of his grey T-shirt. Sephiroth had scrunched his nose in revulsion at the sight of the stain but Cloud had just sighed and walked over to his closet, shuffling through it. The blonde's whole body seemed to have been swallowed by the closet until he emerged with a fluffy blue bathrobe. He had been disappointed when he realised the boy would be leaving to take a shower soon but his mood had done a complete ninety degree turn when he scoped the youth carefully lifting the hem of his shirt and slowly pealing it over his head._

_He had been watching Cloud for nine days by then but that was the first time that that flawless torso was ever revealed to him, the blond always seeming to dress in the bathroom. He remembered how he felt his mouth dry and his pulse quicken as he had drank in the sight of that pale skin covering the lithe but finely defined muscles. As though hypnotised, he had dragged his eyes over the creamy chest, no hair was present and two pink-tinged nipples, hardened from the sudden exposure to the cool air, stood out like two flowers from a stem. His incisors had dug into his lower lip in response to his urge to bite and suckle on those sensitive little buds, to make Cloud cry out as he manipulated his body. His torso was perfect, all toned and petit. So perfect, in fact, that Sephiroth wanted to mark it. He wanted to darken the skin around his neck with his mouth, to leave fingerprints all over his chest and stomach and to make those pink nipples turn a deep red. Oh, he wanted that boy._

_He remembered the state of ecstasy he had been drawn into when the blond didn't just stop at the shirt. Oh no, he had watched, waiting for the arrow of a Bahamut to strike him down and end that perfect moment, as the blond fumbled with the top button of his jeans and then pulled down the zipper before commencing to slide the rough fabric down his legs. A world of sensation had shot straight to his groin as the slim legs were seductively revealed to him, showing more than ever before. The legs were finely haired and slim, but still very boyish. The boy ran almost every day and it showed, the boy's calves were strong and bulging while his thighs were firm and lean. Sephiroth imagined them wrapped around him, tightening with ecstasy as he guided the youth through his sexual awakening._

_The dark blue boxers the boy was wearing were pulled down slightly with his pants and Sephiroth's couldn't help but smirk as the tip of the boy's ass was revealed. His fingers had twitched by his side, longing to both release the pressure in his groin and to slide them down that exposed valley between the boy's ass cheeks. Cloud had continued to remove his stockings clumsily before sliding his thumbs into the waistband of his boxers and lowering them._

_Perfection._

_It was beauty in its truest form. Cloud had stood before him, completely devoid of any clothing or manmade items adorning him. He was like a cherub, all golden and pink and…beautiful. He couldn't remember what his initial reaction had been but what he did know was that the image of that youthful and flawless body had forever been engraved into his mind. The boys back was perfectly curved and dipped down at the end of his spine before swelling into two glorious mounds of flesh, which Sephiroth had craved to sink his fingers into. The posterior was in no way a large one, but it was deliciously swollen and fleshy. Sephiroth had remembered how he was overcome with a strong urge to run a hand over the soft pink-tinged flesh, to separate those mounds and find the special treasure between them. He had had to bite back a moan as the visions assaulted him, filling his mind with wicked ideas._

_Clouds front was just as satisfying as his back. The small navel lay above the well-formed triangle which led to the boy's genitals. Sephiroth could feel his own manhood twitch in its leather encased prison as he eyed the boys still forming penis, which hung around five inches; quite small compared to his own nine inches but the boy was still growing. Cloud, like most children in Midgar, had been circumcised and because of this his pretty member was fully exposed. Sephiroth knew it would turn an assortment of different colours when it was played with. He craved to taste that precious part of Clouds anatomy, something he had never even considered with anyone else before but now he just wanted to taste the boys essence as he drew it from him. The boys perfectly shaped thighs enclosed around his tight scrotum artistically and the soft blond curls around the boy's genital area were very sexy, making Sephiroth want to feel just how soft they were. He had felt himself break out into a sweat as his member stiffened painfully._

_An angel._

_That's what Cloud Strife was. An immortal sent from the Promised Land. A reward for Sephiroth's duty to the world, and he was grateful._

_Sephiroth stared at Cloud for what felt like an eternity but could realistically have been only twenty seconds before the boy wrapped the nightgown around himself. His body was still in a high state of arousal and ecstasy as he watched the blond gather his things and exit the bedroom, probably to enter the shower._

_That night he had left Clouds house early and lay in his bed, dreaming of blue eyes and smooth flesh. His sheets were soaking the following morning._

_Yes… that night had been special. Sephiroth realised that he was probably the first person-non related- to see the boy's body completely nude since the day he was born and this meant a lot to him. He would be the only one to see the boy like this. Cloud was **his **now._

_Sephiroth shook his head to shake off the excess liquid as he approached that special window. He narrowed his eyes when he noticed the light in the room seemed to be shut off and growled when he saw that the blond wasn't in his bed and the apartment was completely quite. He must be out. Sephiroth was annoyed; Cloud had stayed in every weekend for two months except the one he missed? Typical._

_He blew out some air and turned around to stare at the dim landscape. What would he do now? Wait? The boy may not be home for hours. He stood there for a moment, contemplating whether he should just leave, and then an idea struck him. Turning back around swiftly he brought a hand out to trace the bottom of the windowsill. It was an old fashioned design, using Kalm metal. _

_Sephiroth had some experience with this._

_It was easy to open._

* * *

"Keys…" Cloud fussed around his bag pack, waiting to hear that familiar rattling as he made his way up the steps to his apartment. He had spent the night at Zack's; watching a kendo tournament with the two and was only getting home now, at ten in the morning. He didn't like leaving his mom at home alone all night but he had checked in to find that she was doing well and decided that it was better not to return in the middle of the night and wake her. He still felt a little guilty though.

He fished out the keys and looped them around his finger as he walked along his balcony. He had had a good time last night. Before his mom got sick he used to stay at Zack's a lot and it was always fun. He used to do a lot of things he didn't do any more actually. Like stay out late in the park, trying to catch mako flies in a jar, until he would return home, covered in mud and get grounded for a week. Or just lie in front of the TV all day Saturday, watching endless bouts of silly cartoon as his mom made him snacks. He missed those times. He didn't hold any resentment towards his mother, not at all, but he often got angry at the situation. It wasn't fair! His mom was a good person, she didn't deserve this. Cloud sighed; he always got drawn into these depressing thoughts when he was alone.

Shaking his head, the blond inserted the key once he reached the door and entered the house. He could smell something in the kitchen. Pancakes? He narrowed his eyes as he followed the source of the smell.

" Mom?" He raised a brow when saw her standing in the kitchen with two huge stacks of pancakes beside her.

"Hey sweetie! I thought you might be hungry. There your favourite. Maple syrup." Sky smiled sweetly, holding a fork out to her son. Cloud approached her slowly, suspiciously. Usually when she did something like this she wanted something in return.

"What do you want?" He finally said, crossing his arms. Sky made an 'o' with her mouth before turning away from him.

"Am I really that bad a mother that you think I would only make you food when I want something?" She said softly. Cloud widened his eyes and took a step towards her.

"No of course not!" He said eagerly, turning her around. "Sorry." He smiled and took the fork from her and she mirrored the expression. He grabbed the pancakes from the counter and placed them on the table. Sky watched on eagerly as he cut off a little triangle and raised the fork to his mouth. Cloud stopped for a moment before closing his lips around the tasty morsel.

"Well?" Sky asked, clasping her hands together.

"It's good." Cloud said between bites. Smiling encouragingly.

"Oh good," she responded, turning around to pick up some folded clothes. "Oh and Shera needs someone to help put up flyers about her seminar next week. I told her you wouldn't mind." She said airily as she exited the kitchen. Cloud knitted his brows.

He knew it.

After stuffing himself with almost nine pancakes, Cloud painfully made his way to his bedroom. He opened the door and placed his bag down beside his dresser before shrugging off his jacket. He leaned down to crab a clean T-shirt but something from the left caught his eye. He looked over towards his bed and was surprised to see a large silver box placed on top of it.

"Huh?" He mumbled as he stood up and looked at the box with confusion. He walked over to it to get a better look. It was a large box, around twenty inches in diameter and seemed to be covered with simple silver wrapping paper. He spotted some writing on it and was even more confused when the words spelled out his name. A gift?

He brought a hand out to finger the smooth surface carefully; he was confused but couldn't help feeling little bubbles of excitement in his stomach. Should he open it?

"It does say my name…" he mumbled, sitting down on the bed beside it. He bit his lip and read the name again, just to make sure it was his. Deciding that there was no point in just sitting there he brought his finger over to scratch the tape along the centre of the box which holding the wrapping paper together. He started out slow at first but frustration got the better of him and before he knew it the silver paper was on the floor and a shiny black briefcase was sitting in front of him.

"Uh?" He looked towards the door, as if it would give him the answers he wanted. The case was made from very rich dark leather with sterling silver buckles along its sides. It looked expensive. Cloud reached out to the silver buckles, jiggling with them for a minute until he figured it out and they clicked open. All he had to do was open the case.

"Well, here goes nothing. Please don't be a bomb." He nervously chuckled as he gripped the sides of the lid and pulled. Cloud eyes almost bulged out of their sockets as he viewed the contents inside. The case was overcrowded with items he was sure no one he knew could afford. Not all of them anyway. A white 'Tuesti' Laptop, an mp3 player of the same brand, a meteor cell phone (the newest model) an electrical writing pad and a 50 GB memory stick. It was amazing but…it didn't make sense. Who would do this? His mom couldn't afford all of these things. He decided there must have been some mistake and started to gently search around the case for clues.

He found that the lid of the case had pockets on the inside and they were filled with very professional pens, pencils and other writing equipment. Was this from his writing class or something… He searched the pockets gently until he found something promising: a white envelope which was addressed to him.

"Good." He breathed out as he slipped his thumb under the seal and gently pried it open. He found a piece of paper inside and pulled it out. He shook the envelope to make sure it was empty before he held up the note and began to read. With every word he read his face grew more like the paper they were written on. He began to take deep, slow breaths and once he was done he quickly dropped the paper to the ground like it has stung him.

This wasn't possible.

Cloud got up from his bed to walk towards the window, running a hand fussily through his hair. He then leaned his hands against the sill, but moments later put them to his sides before placing them against the wall.

"I don't understand." He yelled in frustration, rubbing his eye. He let out a loud breath and walked back towards the bed, kneeling down and picking up the source of his confusion again. "Is this a joke." his voice cracked slightly as he re-read the short paragraph.

_Cloud._

_I realise this is going to be a shock to you but I've come to the conclusion that it is time to make myself known. I've been watching in on your life for some time now and I am very proud of the young man you have become. You're a good boy, and good boys deserve gifts. I hope these items will be of use to you and I hope you will feel no guilt over the expense. You are more than worth it and it is truly the best money I've spent in a long time. I apologize for any inconvenience this letter may have caused you. Don't be frightened._

_Sincerely, your father._


	7. VII

**Thanks for the reviews, glad your enjoying it!**

******Disclaimer: I don't own final fantasy or any Square enix characters.**

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"So you're sure you never delivered a package to my house? Can't you check again?" Cloud stood on the tips of his toes, his elbows had gone red from supporting most of his body weight against the cold counter.

"Young man, I've checked it twice already. This service never delivered anything to your home. Perhaps it was a different postal service." The old woman behind the counter wrinkled her brow in exasperation, shaking her head. This boy had come in here twenty minutes ago, insisting that a package had to have been delivered to his home by them. The service she worked for kept a very organised file of their deliveries and if it said nothing was given to this boy, then nothing was. The teen must have gotten something unpleasant, she gathered from his frantic and grouchy demeanour, and while she was sympathetic she still couldn't help him find the culprit.

Cloud sighed harshly and let his whole torso fall onto the hard surface of the counter, not even caring that he was acting like a spoilt child who didn't get the toy he wanted. "But you're the only one left," he mumbled, more to himself than the post-mistress. He raised himself up from the counter slowly, as if something was weighing him down, and brought his weary eyes up to meet the woman's. "Thanks for your time." He said half-heartedly. Cloud turned towards the door but just before he exited he turned back towards her and added "just…if anything comes up could you call me…please?" The woman nodded softly, sympathy shining from her grey eyes through the thick rimmed glasses she wore.

Cloud closed his eyes as the harsh glare of the sunlight assaulted his irises the moment he stepped out of the post office. He was exhausted. Since receiving that 'present' two nights ago he hadn't gotten a wink of sleep. He couldn't stop thinking about it; it was just so unreal. His father had been absent his whole life, since before he was even born. His conception was the product of a one night fling and his mom never even knew the man's name so… how was this possible. Cloud would have concluded that it couldn't be his father and that it had to be someone else, but in a way that seemed just as unreal. Who on the planet would send him all of this stuff, worth thousands of Gil, just as a joke? Cloud let out an 'ahhh' sound and rubbed his eyes harshly, turning them red. This was all just so confusing!

He had spent the last two days going from post office to post office, shop to shop, trying to find some clue as to who bought the items or at least who delivered them. It was no use though, every place he went he got negative answers to all of his questions and it was frustrating him. Someone had to have delivered the box, hadn't they?

He had inspected his window that night but found that it was closed tightly and hadn't been tampered with which meant no one could have broken in, something which had relieved Cloud instantly. Still, if no one had delivered it then how did it get into his room. He hadn't asked his mom about the package specifically but he did ask if anything had come in the mail for him to which she said that it hadn't. He didn't want to worry her with the real situation because the stress wouldn't be good for her.

The whole thing was making Cloud angry and nervous but… there was something else there too. Something Cloud didn't want to admit, even to himself, but in the bottom of his stomach he knew it was there. This little tendril of excitement coiling within him. What if this was his father? How would he react then? All his life he had wanted a dad; someone who would do all those boyish things that fathers did with their sons, like play sports or roughhouse or eat a bunch of junk food until they felt sick. Someone who would call him 'sport' and ruffle his hair when he won a race or passed a test. When he was younger he used to sit on the swings in the park and glare at the little boys playing with their dads. 'It's not fair' he remembered thinking 'I'm a good boy. I want one too' and he had sat there, truly believing that one day his dad would finally find him there, walk over to him and pick him up in his strong arms. He would say 'Im here now Cloud, I'm sorry I'm so late' and of course Cloud would forgive him because he was his father.

That was a long time ago though, and Cloud had grown up since then. He had accepted that his father didn't know he even existed and probably wouldn't care if he did. He had given up on his childish fantasy and moved on. That's why this was just so…upsetting. How could he deal with this? He couldn't be happy because he knew it wasn't real but he couldn't forget it because really he hoped it was real. He knew he was being stupid but until he found the truth he knew that these contradictions would tear at his mind; tormenting him.

The flustered youth ran a hand through his hair, pulling it slightly. This was the last delivery service in the city, and they didn't know anything about the package. What would he do now? The blond felt his eyes become watery and sniffled softly. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. He thumbed in the number and placed the phone to his ear when it began to ring. He really needed someone to talk to.

"Yo." The voice on the other end of the line spoke up, Cloud would have normally rolled his eyes at the others manner. What was wrong with 'hello'?

"Zack." Cloud said softly, unsure of what to say now that he thought about it.

"Cloud? Hey dosser! Why aren't you in today?" Cloud sighed, he had missed school today in favour of solving his little mystery.

"Im hardly a dosser Zack, you miss at least one day a week!" He shot back, not really being able to bring any enthusiasm into his voice.

"Touché. Okay so what's up? Is everything okay with your mom?" The other said, a little more serious now.

"Mom's fine," the blond answered, "is you busy after school?"

"No, I've got nothing on today. You wanna meet up?" The other inquired, Cloud could hear the noises in the background and knew that Zack's class was about to begin.

"Yeah, um…could you come over to mine later? I could really use someone to talk to right now." Cloud said, realising that he sounded like a whiny girl. He felt a lump rise in his throat and knew he had to get off the phone soon or he would make a complete fool of himself.

"Of course Cloud. I'll get there straight after school okay."

"Yeah, okay. See you then." And Cloud pressed the hang up button quickly before letting out a small sob. He rubbed at his eyes with his sleeve while swallowing harshly. He took a few minutes to compose himself before he picked up his bag pack and headed for the bus stop.

* * *

Knock, Knock.

"I'll get it!" Cloud informed as he made his way to the front door. It was four fifteen so he knew it was bound to be Zack and he felt a little flutter of nervousness because of this. Should he really be bothering the other with his problems? When he thought about it, he couldn't help but feel a little stupid; why would Zack need to know about any of this?

Then again, Zack had always been the one he'd call when he was in trouble or just needed a friend. The ravenette had been there when his mom first got sick and had been a constant brick-wall for him ever since. He couldn't imagine where he would now be if it weren't for the other.

Cloud shook his head, took a deep breath and opened the door.

"Hey," came Zack's cheerful greeting as he was let in. He trailed his eyes over the other and frowned, "damn Cloud, you look like crap!" He commented with a raised eyebrow.

"Uh…" Cloud pursed his lips, looking down, "Thanks?" This caused Zack to chuckle sheepishly.

"Sorry, I just mean you look really…tired." He explained, eyes narrowing in worry. Cloud did look bad; his usually bright eyes were dull and had dark bags underneath. His hair was drooping and unwashed and his face looked sickly pale and blotchy-like he had been rubbing it. The baggy and dark cloths didn't help his image much either.

"Yeah well…" Cloud sighed, scuffing a hand through his hair. Did he really look that bad? He didn't know why, but he never wanted to look too gross in front of Zack. The ravenette's statement bothered him more than he wanted to admit. "Why don't we go into my room?" He said softly as he closed the front door and led the way to the stated destination. Zack shrugged and followed the blond silently.

"So what's going on spiky?" Zack said softly once they were inside the room. He reached out a hand out to ruffle the others hair affectionately.

"Uh, something's happened. Nothing too bad really. Just something…strange." Cloud stumbled over his words, automatically pushing Zack's hand out of his hair. The older boy looked at the other seriously, not a bit of his carefree persona shining through. Zack took in a quick breath, preparing himself for something bad.

"What." He pressed, looking the other straight in the eye. The gaze was intense and it made the hairs on the back of Clouds neck stand up.

"Uh, well…" the blond looked away, "I got something. A present."

"A present?" Zack said slowly, widening his eyes at Cloud like he had lost his mind. He was completely confused about where this conversation was going now.

"Yeah." The smaller boy answered. He turned towards his closet and walked towards it without another word. Zack made a 'hu' sound and looked up towards the ceiling. Was the blond going to clarify or did he have to guess what the problem was? He turned his eyes back towards Cloud and watched as the blond turned around and approached him, carrying a big black case which looked too heavy for his svelte frame.

"Is this the present?" He asked as Cloud placed it on the bed. The blond nodded, fiddling with the silver buckles on the outside of the case. The case was opened and Zack's eyes widened at the contents. "Shit!" He exclaimed excitedly, kneeling down by the bed. "Are you serious? This is awesome!"

"Yeah." Cloud said with not nearly as much enthusiasm. He didn't blame Zack for being excited, he had been too. Very excited. Since he read that letter, however, he had not been able to use any of the stuff, it was just too weird.

Zack rummaged through the contents, letting out appreciative noised every so often. He almost forgot about the reason he was here but remembered when he looked towards the blond and saw the frown on his face.

"What's wrong?" He said again, bringing a hand out to nudge the others pant leg. Cloud sighed and pointed back towards the case. Zack followed his finger and saw a small piece of paper sticking out of a pocket on the interior of the lid. He didn't ask as he reached out and grabbed the paper, scanning his eyes over the writing.

A tense silence followed as Cloud watched on apprehensively while Zack's eyes became narrower with every word he read. When the ravenette had finished he looked back towards the boy.

"Oh, Cloud…" He didn't really know what to say, but this definitely explained the blonds state at the moment.

"Yeah." Was all Cloud said in return. The blond let out a breath through partly closed lips and sank down to his knees beside the other.

Zack scanned his eyes over the letter again. He didn't like this. It just didn't feel right to him; as far as he knew Clouds father didn't even know he existed so why this all of a sudden? Wouldn't Clouds father try to make some other form of communication with the boy before performing such a severe gesture? Surly a normal person knew it would upset Cloud. This was weird.

What was the alternative explanation though? That was a potentially worse situation. These gifts came from somewhere and if it wasn't really Clouds father then that meant that there was someone out there who knew enough about Cloud to do this.

"This is weird. Have you ever gotten anything like this before?" Zack inquired, not really putting much effort into his question. He didn't really take in the situation yet.

"No." Cloud sighed. "Nothing. Ever. This is completely out of the blue. It's weird right?" Cloud brought his eyes over to the other and Zack could see that he was desperately hoping for him to agree with him.

"Yeah, it's pretty weird." The ravenette nodded, flicking the paper with his thumb. "Do you have any way of tracking the person who sent this?"

"No." Cloud shook his head, his blond locks falling into his eyes as he did so. "I've spent the last two days trying to find the delivery service who brought this here but they've all denied that they did. I've looked everywhere. And I'm pretty sure mom didn't sign for it It's like it just appeared in my room or something." The last statement caused Zack to straighten up swiftly.

"Did you check your window?" This was just getting worse.

"Yeah, it looks fine. I don't think that's how it got here." Cloud confirmed. The older boy let out a tense breath which was noticed by the blond. "Someone must of delivered it. Just don't know who," he mumbled.

"I dunno, spiky." Zack scratched his temple with his little finger, a thinking habit of his. "Uh…well. If your mom didn't sign for it and no one delivered it then there has to be some other explanation for how it got there. I mean…I have heard about transportation by magic's but that kind of materia is only accessible to very powerful people. Like Shinra personnel. Then again, I guess whoever got you this had to be pretty rich."

"Well, my mom doesn't remember much about my father but I think she did say he left with the army the next day. He could work for Shinra, right?" Cloud rubbed his thumb over the leather of the case, biting his lip. He had never thought of material transportation. That made sense. The fact that his father could be in a position which allowed him to use such magic just connected the dots further. He felt little jitters of excitement in his stomach and tried to ignore them. He couldn't set himself up for too high of a fall.

"Yeah I guess but…this is weird Cloud. I just wouldn't get too hopeful yet. This could be dangerous." Cloud looked up sharply at the other when he said this.

"Dangerous? Why? I mean…if it is a joke then that's what it will be. I don't think its too serious of a problem." He really didn't, he had been worried about the situation only because of the emotional turbulence. He never thought the perpetrator was a potential threat to him. Why would someone want to hurt him. He didn't do anything. Did he?

"Cloud, this is way too extreme to be a joke. If it isn't really your father then there is someone out there who knows you and wants to fuck with your head. Didn't you think about this properly?" Zack held the note out towards the blond, trying to emphasize his seriousness.

"That's a little extreme Zack." Cloud replied testily, grabbing the note from the other.

The two sat in silence for a while; Zack searching the case for more clues and Cloud avoiding eye contact with him.

"What if it is?" The blond's soft voice broke the silence eventually. Zack looked over at him questioningly. "My dad. What if it really is him? What then?" he elaborated.

"Well, I guess that's up to you. What do you think? Would you be happy, sad, mad…" he let his voice trail off as he put an elbow on the bed and regarded the other. Clouds face changed in a swirl of different emotions. Zack could practically see the thoughts floating around his head.

"I dunno really. It would be kinda…cool." Pink lips tilted upwards slightly but it only lasted a second. "Then again, if he knew about me then where was he for the last fifteen years? Am I supposed to just accept that he wasn't ready? That doesn't seem fair." Cloud stated more to himself than the other. Zack nodded his head, letting the smaller boy perceive it as he liked.

"It's bad to be thinking of this though, right? I'm just getting my hopes up." The blond continued. He groaned unhappily and buried his head in his arms, which were folded on the bed. "See, this is worth missing a day of school." He grumbled without lifting his head. Zack blew some hair out of his eyes and patted the other on the back softly.

"Okay, just this once you didn't ditch." He chuckled softly. Cloud made a 'hmph' noise and lifted his head.

"So what do you think I should do then?" He asked.

"I'm not sure. Maybe you should just stop thinking about it for a while and wait to see if anything happens. You should probably be a little careful for a while though, just in case." Zack answered, nodding his head at his own suggestion.

"Careful how?" Cloud scrunched his nose in question. He didn't like the way Zack was making this seem more serious than it was.

"Just…try to avoid walking home too late or going out in the dark. If this isn't your dad then it could be some weirdo who's taken some kind of interest in you." Zack replied bluntly, not even trying to sugar-coat the truth. Cloud could feel a shiver go down his spine at the others words. He didn't really think Zack's idea was correct but he still didn't like hearing it. It was way too creepy to imagine.

"Okay." He agreed with his friend even though he desperately wanted to protest against being treated like a girl. Zack had that look in his eyes which he always had when he was in no mood to argue. "I'm not going to use the stuff though." He added as an afterthought.

"Yeah, I can understand that, but man this shit is seriously awesome. If this does turn out to be your old man he's got a stylish way of apologising!" Zack held up the black Ipod like it was a prize. Cloud rolled his eyes and grabbed it from him. He stood up and began to place some of the fallen items back into the case before closing it and putting it back into the closet.

Zack turned around and sat on his rump against the bed. He was still circulating the whole situation in his head. Something just felt very wrong about all this. He hoped for Clouds sake that it really was his dad. He hoped this for two reasons; the first was that he could see how Cloud was secretly excited about all of this. He knew not having a father all his life had affected the blond and had made him feel unwanted. Zack could understand that, he wasn't too close with his father but Angeal had really played that role in his life and he didn't know how he would have grown up without him. It was good to have a male to talk to about stuff like puberty and sex; he couldn't imagine talking to his mother about that kind of stuff. He had tried to be there for Cloud when he had questions and worries but the blond was mostly too shy to reciprocate the conversation. He still tried though and was happy to see that the blond did come to him for some stuff, like this for example. He felt really flattered that the boy chose him to confide in.

The other reason he hoped it was in fact the boys father was that if it wasn't then a whole new can of worms would be opened and he didn't want a situation like that to worm its way into Clouds already stressful life. It wouldn't be fair on him.

He shook his head and threw on a lopsided grin as Cloud walked back towards him and fell onto the bed with a loud sigh.

"So much sighs Cloudy." Zack tutted, using his left arm to pull himself up onto the bed. He shoved the blond, rather rudely, to make more room for himself. Cloud scowled slightly as he lay back down beside the others larger frame. He brought his fingers up to walk the wall.

"How many are you allowed a day cause I think I've exceeded it." Cloud replied and Zack laughed lightly.

"It's a special occasion so I think your okay." He assured the other who nodded tiredly.

"So anything new with you?" Cloud asked after a few minutes of them both staring at the ceiling.

"Uh, yeah but it's not important right now." Zack said airily but Cloud could feel his body tense beside him.

"C'mon tell me. I need something new to take my mind off the other thing." The blond urged. Zack pursed his lips, wondering just why he didn't feel comfortable telling the other his news.

"Well," he said after a minute, "I've started seeing someone." He didn't understand why that was so awkward, friends talked about this the whole time, right?

Cloud shifted beside him, remaining silent. He didn't know what to say. It was odd but he felt a little twinge in his stomach upon hearing the others words. "Oh." He said lamely.

"Yeah."

"Who?" Cloud said, a little faster than he had meant to.

"Its uh, Tifa actually." Zack answered, turning to look at the other. "We hooked up a few times before but last night I guess we decided to give it a try." He smiled at the other, trying to get rid of the awkwardness.

"Tifa? Cool. She's really nice." Cloud didn't know why the words tasted like acid on his tongue. He could feel the others gaze on him but kept his eyes towards the ceiling.

"Yeah, she's a great girl. Fucking hot too." Zack mumbled and Cloud nodded his head, smirking.

"I think she has the biggest boobs in school." He received a punch from Zack in response to that.

"Hey buddy, that's my girlfriend you're talking about." They both tensed at the fifth word but Cloud ignored it and rubbed his arm while stating.

"I guess that suits because you have the biggest-"

"Cloudy, that's dirty." Zack mock gasped.

"Ego. Zack, I was going to say ego." Cloud stated dead tone.

"Oh that too." The ravenette countered cheekily. Cloud made an exasperated noise before closing his eyes. Zack stayed silent when the blond didn't open them again. Cloud let the exhaustion catch up on him and drifted into a deep sleep.

Zack must have stayed there for around thirty minutes as the blond never opened his eyes and his breathing became even and deep. Even when he was sure the boy was asleep he stayed there and just looked at him, not exactly sure why he was doing it, until his own vision became dark and he joined the boy in the second reality.

* * *

_Green eyes narrowed as they surveyed the scene through the pollution-stained glass. The sight of the two boys; so close, so obliviously unaware of their slumbering bodies making contact everywhere they could, made his stomach churn. Disgusting._

_He felt his hand twitch by his side as he took in the sight of his boy. Cloud looked so innocent and small as he curled his body on the soft mattress. His mouth was open slightly as he breathed heavily while his petit hand was curled close to his face, making Sephiroth wonder why such a small detail seemed to heighten the blonds appeal ten-fold. He was just so…ethereal. The fact that he didn't look or act like other humans was attractive to Sephiroth. He was far from an average human himself._

_They would be a perfect match. A God and his angel._

_He smirked at the thought while trailing his eyes over the other less desirable form. Zackary Fair. How dare that young whelp lay beside his boy like that? Why did he have the privilege to speak to him, to make him laugh…to touch him. What had he ever done that was so special it deserved such a reward. It made Sephiroth angry to see Clouds skin bemired by the others touch. He bared his teeth and narrowed his eyes as Cloud shuffled closer to the other boy. Friends nephew or not, he wanted to kill that Zackary Fair._

_Sephiroth placed a hand across his forehead, turning swiftly and walking to the edge of the balcony. He took in a breath through his nose and let the cool breeze sooth his unusually flushed skin. Gaia, what was happening to him? He loved this new life and these new emotions that came with it. He had never felt so alive and so… in love._

_Yes, he loved Cloud._

_He really loved that boy, but it was becoming difficult. His mind was in constant turmoil now. Every time he closed his eyes he was haunted by images of bright blue and creamy pale. His body felt hypersensitive all day long, vulnerable to any sudden change of emotion. His thoughts constantly switched from hopeful visions of the future to more arduous ones of the present._

_Jealousy._

_Sephiroth had remembered being envious of many things during his life.; happiness, friendship, love… freedom. Overtime he had learned to channel those feelings into something he could use: Anger._

_Anger had helped him through life. It helped him to become the killing machine he was today. He learned how to control his frustration, unleash it on the enemy and then contain it until it was needed again. Learning to encapsulate his emotions like this had eventually helped him to form the bitter shell of a man he was today._

_It was different now though; he was different. He had never felt envy like he felt it now. Every day this possessive feeling in his gut became stronger and his thoughts more corrupted. The idea of Cloud been taken away from him had entered his mind a few weeks ago, when he was sitting in his home just letting his mind drift. He realised that the blond was a gift from the planet and that he was fragile. The night of the party was a perfect example of the dangers someone like Cloud faced in his life. Sephiroth had protected him then and would do it again if needed._

_Unfortunately, the threats weren't as much to Clouds life as they were to his body._

_A body which now belonged to Sephiroth._

_Cloud Strife was a virgin, completely untouched by man. Sephiroth didn't know why exactly he hadn't given in to temptation yet. Perhaps he was waiting for someone special? Cloud really was unique; not many teenage boys in Midgar were as innocent (not by choice anyway)._

_He was aware of how lucky he had gotten when he discovered the boy to be pure. There and then he had made a promise to himself that he would be the one to rid the boy of his virtue when the time was right, and if anyone else tried? They would die._

_Sephiroth ran a long finger over the rusted metal of the balcony ledge. He closed his eyes and imagined that it was Clouds skin he was touching. It wouldn't be solid and rough like metal though, no, it would be warm and supple._

_Cloud was warm._

_And Sephiroth was cold._

_Sephiroth needed to be warm too. He had been in the cold world for far too long now. Longer than anyone deserved to be._

_He dragged a hand down, towards the outside of his left thigh and under his coat. His callous hands brushed across something soft, a contrast to his leather attire. He gripped the material and pulled it out of its hiding place, bringing it up towards his face. This woollen scarf may not seem special to the normal homo-sapien but to Sephiroth it was one of the most important things in the world._

_Two nights ago he had broken into the blond's room. He had expertly manipulated the window until it opened without damage. He used a pseudo-shape materia to allow his body to slip through the small opening silently and untraceably and then he had tasted his euphoria._

_Every crevice of the space belonged to Cloud and he could feel him in it. Clouds scent was in the air and he had breathed it in like a smoker inhales nicotine. He had felt no fear as he shuffled through the golden room. It was a very unique room; Sephiroth guessed that Cloud had styled it as a shelter from the reality of his world. The walls were a creamy golden with a white border. His bedspreads and curtains were black and little knick-knacks hung from the ceiling and shelves. The red carpet was old and well worn making Sephiroth guess it had been there when the blond and his mother first moved in. He took the time to read some of the random things written on Clouds walls; signatures, brightest of all those by Zackary Fair, but also from his other friends. There were also quotes from famous books written out and many posters of random things littering the solid surface._

_The whole room was personalised and creative and Sephiroth couldn't help but contrast it to his own living space. There were no sea shell 'dream-catchers' or sky-pirate figurines in his room, only white washed walls and glass décor. He didn't have the ability to be creative like his boy; it just wasn't in his nature. In fact, his home was reminiscing of the sterile environment he grew up in._

_He had spent some time lingering around the room quietly, never wanting to leave the scented heaven. Taking note of the poor quality of the walls and lack of a television or any electronic equipment, Sephiroth had gotten an idea. He was becoming sick of always watching Cloud and never being acknowledged, he wanted to do something that affected the boys life._

_Before he left to perform his new task, he had opened the closet door and viewed its content, bringing a hand out to run along the fabric of one of the boys T-shirts. He had looked down and noticed a green scarf thrown to the bottom corner of the press._

_Cloud wouldn't miss it._

_Sephiroth had smirked to himself as he made his way languidly down the street, green wool wrapped around his hand. He brought his eyes up to see the ominous Shinra building shadowing the city. He would find what he needed there._

_So he had gathered an assortment of items from the technology department in Shinra. He had put them in a briefcase and wrapped it so it would look like a child's Christmas present, and of course he had left a note._

_Yes, the note was the centre piece of his plan. He had discovered that the boy had no father a while back and had instantly realised that that tid-bit of information could be used to his advantage when the time was right._

_It was the right time._

_Cloud barley had a mother now and as someone who never had parents to speak of, he knew it would be vulnerability in the boy. So he signed the card in a guise of the boy's father, broke back into the boy's house and left it on his bed. He had exited the room swiftly, taking care to ensure the window looked as it always did and then he had waited interminable hours for the blond's return, disturbed that he had spent the night elsewhere. He decided that he would have to scan the boy's condition when he returned to insure he was behaving correctly._

_Cloud returned early the next day and Sephiroth's foul mood was lifted when he saw the teen enter his room. His cloths and hair looked clean and un-wrinkled which indicated he hadn't been doing anything sexual, Sephiroth could always tell if someone had had sex; there was just this aura around them._

_Cloud hadn't noticed the box for a few minutes but when he did Sephiroth had to hold in a chuckle at the utter look of confusion on his face. The blond approached it slowly, like a grunt would approach a sleeping monster. He could almost hear Clouds inner debate as he contemplated the box until finally he gave into his youthfulness and ripped it open. Cloud took no notice of the discarded silver paper on his floor as he squinted his eyes at the case in front of him. He bent down apprehensively and opened the buckles on the side. Sephiroth did laugh at the blond's next statement._

_"Please don't be a bomb." Oh, it may be more complicated than a bomb. The look on Clouds face when he finally opened the case made everything Sephiroth had done worthwhile. His big blue eyes widened comically as he browsed through the contents. Sephiroth watched as his pink lips opened in wonder and he felt a twinge in his chest. Cloud was touching something he had touched, Cloud was reacting to something he had done, and Cloud was acknowledging his existence, even if he didn't know it._

_The blonds whole aura seemed to do a complete hundred degree turn once he found and read the note though. His eyes dulled and watered insistently and a frown came on his face. A sad frown, like someone had done the meanest thing in the world. He watched as the note floated to the ground while Cloud stood up and looked around aimlessly. Poor Cloud, so confused._

_Sephiroth couldn't help but admire the blond in his sadness; it was just an attractive image, mostly because he had caused that sadness. He didn't care that the blond was hurt because eventually it would be for his own good. He would use this to get close to the boy and get to know him more._

_The blond had bounded over to the window to examine it. He could hear his own hair blowing in the wind as he stood right beside the window, arms stretched to the wall. He could hear Clouds heavy breathing as he stood by the window and then went back to the bed. He turned back around and smirked at the sight within._

_He had made Cloud cry._

* * *

"Sorry." Cloud said as he bumped into yet another person on his way to the cafeteria. He was balancing two books, an apple, a lunchbox and his schoolbag which made walking in a straight line quite difficult. He sighed as he approached the door and prepared to shuffle his stuff in order to open it. Before he could, however, a strong hand reached out from behind him and pushed the door open, holding it there. Cloud rose a brow as he turned to look at the culprit.

"Vossler!" He exclaimed and then cringed when he realised he said it out loud.

"Thought you could use a hand. Or two." The other smirked, he inclined his head towards the door and asked "are you gonna go in or what?"

"Oh, sure. Thank you." Cloud said sincerely as he readjusted his bag. "I think I need to organise myself better."

"Or join the circus." The other commented while Cloud gave him a questioning stare. "Juggling…" He offered and the blond made an 'o' shape with his mouth.

"Maybe. I'd better head in then, you wanna come?" Cloud said as he turned his body to face the door. Vossler shook his head and pointed a thumb towards the corridor.

"Kendo." He answered and Cloud nodded his head, smiling.

"Guess you're just a Good Samaritan then." He mumbled.

"I don't know about that. Anyway my hands getting a little stiff…"

"Oh sorry. I'll get going. See you later?" Cloud said a little awkwardly and gave the other a wave with his apple before entering the cafeteria. Vossler watched him go before moving his hand and letting the door fall closed.

As Cloud approached the table he felt his spirit dampen slightly. Zack was sitting there with the usual group but the one difference was that he had his arm draped around a rather busty brunette. Tifa.

"Hey." He said softly when he reached them. They mumbled hi and he sat down beside Reno.

"You look tired." Aerith commented as he took out a chocobo and mayonnaise sandwich.

"I don't know why. We slept for like fourteen hours last night." Zack commented and Reno raised a brow.

"You stayed at his place?" He asked and Zack nodded, thinking about the night before. They had stayed in bed right until that morning, Cloud had two days sleep to catch up on and Zack had secretly woken up on different intervals but didn't feel like moving so he just watched the blond in his slumber. He didn't admit that though. "Damn Tif, you should get him to do that with you, huh?" Reno waggled his eyebrows.

"Reno!" Tifa exclaimed, giving him a pointed look. "Anyway, dad would kill you, I think." She smirked towards Zack who sat up straight.

"For you. I'll brave it." He said in a deep voice while Tifa laughed. Cloud rolled his eyes and bit into his food. He didn't know why he felt so annoyed but he just did.

The rest of the lunch continued with a light hearted conversation until the bell rang, signalling the end of recess.

* * *

A few days later Cloud was just arriving home from school.

"Hey mom, I'm home." He muttered as he knelt down to pick up the male which had -fallen through the letter-box. He walked towards the kitchen counter, half heartedly browsing through the envelopes until he found one addressed to him. He put the rest down and studied it. It was an informal envelope with the word 'Cloud' written on the front using blue pen.

He felt his heart skip a beat when he realised he recognised the writing. Throwing his bag down to the floor he rushed to his room and sat down on his bed, contemplating the letter. He tried to relax his breathing and slipped his finger under the seal to open it. This could be the one thing that would answer the questions tormenting him. Or it could make the situation more intractable. Either way, he needed to know.

His hands were shaking as the pulled the paper out from its cocoon. He brought his eyes down slowly to read but narrowed them when he saw that there was just a single thing written on the paper.

An email address?

* * *

******!!!!!!!IMPORTANT!!!!!!!**

******Hey! The next chapter of this story will be posted under the Cloud section instead of Cloud and Zack. I just feel that Sephiroth and Zack have equally large parts in this story and it doesn't feel right to leave him out!**


	8. VIII

**DISCLAIMER: don't own any Final Fantasy or Square Enix characters.**

* * *

Cloud sucked his lip in under his teeth, contemplating the screen in front of him dubiously. His index finger caressed the heated surface of the button it was hovering over. He closed his eyes and ran a hand across his forehead. The menacing light from the screen shone through his eyelids, indicating the lack of refute from his dilemma.

A quick exhale of breath, a jerk of his finger and an electrical conformation was all that were needed to end his choice in the matter. It was out there now; gone off to play with fate and consequence.

The blonde stood up from his chair and closed the laptop. He tried to swallow the nervousness in his stomach as he reached down and grabbed his school bag. Turning to look at the portable computer one more time, he left his bedroom and headed to school.

* * *

Cloud played with the sweet wrapper in his hands, twisting and manipulating it idly as he half-listened to his friend's usual banter at their cafeteria table. He became more sentient when he felt a large hand plunge into his hair and ruffle it.

"Hey Cloudy, why so glum?" Zack's familiar voice filled his ears as the older boy took a seat beside him. He looked over and gave a small smile, shaking his head in response to the question.

"Oh? Just being your normal moody self then I suppose?" The boy smirked, grabbing a couple of fries from the tray he brought with him and stuffing them into his mouth.

"Yeah, sure." Cloud retorted sarcastically, picking a piece of fallen potato from the others shirt and holding it up, shaking his head in a scolding manner. "Are we animals Zackary?" He said in a teacher-like voice.

"Well…" Zack smiled coyly and Cloud narrowed his eyes. The blond jerked back when Zack shot forward and snapped the piece of fry from his fingers; baring his teeth like a canine. Cloud stared wide-eyed as the he grinned and stated, "a wolf, maybe."

"You're a freak! Almost bit my fingers off." Cloud grumbled in exasperation as he wiped them in his pant leg. Zack bit the inside of his cheek but the two of them inevitably fell into a fit of laughter. "There all spitty." Cloud tried to saw between laughs which caused Zack to laugh even louder. The rest of the table turned their attention towards the two.

"What's going on?" Yuffie questioned and became frustrated when she was ignored.

Cloud wiped his eyes with his sleeve, trying to control his laughter. The situation wasn't even that funny, it was just the expressions Zack made. The way he talked.

Zack sat back and put his hands behind his head. He waved off the curious gazes coming from his friends, stating it was just, 'a Cloudy and Zack moment.' And they all rolled their eyes in annoyance. Cloud looked over at Zack who smirked back.

The moment was broken when a feminine voice spoke up behind Zack. Cloud felt a frown form on his face when a particular busty brunette took a seat beside his friend and kissed him on the cheek.

"Hello lovely." Zack said, and Cloud didn't understand why, when the raven haired boy placed his arm around Tifa's shoulder, he lost his appetite.

"Hey." She smirked back. She then turned to Cloud and gave him a smile. "Hi Cloud." She greeted. Cloud shook himself from his thoughts.

"Hey Tifa. How are you?" He returned, forcing a sugar-filled smile her way.

"Oh she is fiiiiine Cloudy." Zack stated lecherously which earned him a punch in the shoulder from the brunette. Cloud let out a small laugh, feeling like it was appropriate. He honestly didn't know why seeing the two made his mood dampen. Perhaps he was feeling a little lonely lately; everyone just seemed to be pairing off, while he was still alone. He was only fifteen but it seemed like he was behind on the whole… romantic scene. He hadn't even kissed anyone before, let alone anything else.

None of this really bothered him until suddenly his best friend was taken too. Zack was his rock, always had been, and now it seemed like he was sort of drifting away. He couldn't confide in him anymore. Zack wanted to spend time with his new girlfriend and Cloud didn't want to upset that so he had kind of kept his distance for the last two weeks.

"Damn this dance shit. I aint goin to it." Reno's grumbling voice spoke up after a few minutes of idle chatter. "Load of crap." The volatile redhead concluded, sticking his fork harshly into the food in front of him. Yuffie scoffed and shook her head.

This Friday marked the seventieth anniversary of the opening of Midgar Holy high. There was a school dance taking place that Friday and Yuffie was on (in charge of) the committee. The benefits went to the local Midgar orphan-edge.

"Of course they're all going. It's for a good cause and more importantly I," she emphasised the last noun by pointing to herself grandly, "am on the committee so it's gonna kick the ass of any dance that came before it. Oh yeah." She gloated.

"We're going." Yuna and Tidus said simultaneously before turning to look at each other.

"Jinx!" Yuna stated, giggling. Tidus just smirked cheekily and got up in search of the vending machine.

"What about you Ax?" Yuna cooed, leaning forward and squinting one eye. "You bringing that new luuuva of yours? Huh, huh?" Axel became tense, leaning back in his seat.

"Ya have someone? Who?" Reno questioned, arching a brow in suspicion. He usually knew everything that went on in his cousin's life. How had this little titbit of information surpassed him?

"None of your business Ren." Axel answered coolly. He knew this would annoy Reno. Ever since he had come to live with him when they were young, Reno had always been trying to out-do him. Nicer car, cooler phone, hotter date. Not knowing what Axel's new boyfriend looked like or who he was, would drive him crazy. Satisfying.

"Whatever." Reno snorted, looking back down at the table in a sulk. There were sniggers all around the table at his behaviour.

"I'm not going." Leon spoke up, his eyes never leaving his food. Yuffie turned her head towards him and Cloud swore he could see a large vein in her forehead.

"Oh stop being such a moody loner Leon. Get a life okay and try acting like kid instead of a moody old man for one, "She hissed derisively, glaring at him. Leon only popped a tomato into his mouth and raised a brow, making sure she knew just how bothered he was by it. She shook her head, really angry, and hissed. "Mean, horrible jerk face." Cloud decided she wasn't going to get much madder.

"Um, I ah…I don't think I'm gonna be going either Yuf," He stated nervously.

"What?" It wasn't Yuffie but Zack who reacted to his revelation. The blond turned his head and met a pair of enquiring purple orbs. Tifa was looking at him with a curious gaze, but it seemed much emptier than her boyfriend's.

_Boyfriend_

"Yeah," Cloud shrugged, fiddling with the wrapper, "I just don't really feel like it. Anyway it's more of a couples thing." It was true. The dance was really a night for couples, slow music, dancing and pictures. It screamed romance. Cloud knew that if he went it would just be another night to remind him that he was alone.

The other reason for his decision was the fact that he hadn't gone out since Tifa's party, but he ignored that.

"Awe you don't need a date Cloudy, it's just another party same as all the rest of them." Zack stated and he could see Reno nod from the corner of his eye. He didn't notice Tifa flinch.

"Nah, blondies right. Bunch of girly shit."

"Yeah. I just don't feel like it." Cloud stated again. He looked up at Zack and noticed his friend studying him.

"Cloud," the boy started but was cut off when the blond put up his hand.

"Be quiet Fair." He stated briskly, wanting the topic to end.

"Assholes!" Yuffie suddenly shouted, rising from her seat and leaving the table quickly. None of her jocular personality shone through as the small girl stormed out of the cafeteria. "Mean, horrible, moody, emo, looser-face, awful…"

"Guess she's insulted." Reno stated dryly and Cloud furrowed his brows in guilt.

* * *

The best part of school had to be the end. When that last bell rings, it's like a weight is lifted from your shoulders and you're free for a whole night. It never even factors into your brain that you're going to have to face the whole thing again the next day.

Cloud sighed as he made his way down the steps, taking a lemon drop from his pocket and popping it into his mouth. He looked over to where Yuffie's bike normally stayed during the day and felt guilty when he saw that it was gone; she sometimes waited for a while to talk to him. He didn't blame her for being mad; she had been talking about how cool the dance was going to be non-stop for the past two weeks, stating that they never had someone like her on the committee before. He had told her he was going to go but that was before…

Cloud stopped walking and ran a hand through his hair, looking towards the bright sky. He really needed to change his attitude. The real reason he wasn't going to the dance was because of Zack and Tifa. He wouldn't mind going with Zack, just as friends, but now he had a girlfriend and he knew that Tifa would want him all to herself and that would result in him being alone and awkward for the night.

He just felt like something had shifted- it wasn't the same. Zack had hooked up with numerous people before but this was the first time he was serious with someone and it was just…different.  
Blue eyes scanned the students in the school yard, looking over all the different faces, before he caught sight of a familiar pair of smouldering eyes.

Vossler.

Cloud bit his lip as he contemplated the older boy from across the yard. Vossler was an attractive; no-one could deny that. His muscular physique and good looks were made all the more attractive by his friendly personality. And he was definitely… both ways inclined. Cloud felt his stomach rise to his chest.

Not knowing what he was doing or why he was doing it, the small teen found himself walking towards the group of boys that Vossler was hanging with. He felt his heart beating in his ears, his palms became sweaty as he made his way over. He stopped in front of the boys, noticing with disdain that they were all taller than him. The group were mostly turned away from the blond and didn't notice him at first.

He shook his head and made a move to turn away, the apprehension getting too much for him.

"Cloud?" He turned back around to see all of them staring at him; Vossler had called his name and was now looking at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Uh," Cloud started, feeling his cheeks heat up severely. He smiled nervously, feeling at least three sets of eyes burning into him. "I just wanted to ask you something. In private." He had walked the plank, may as well jump in now.

"Oh. Okay then." Vossler said. He walked up to the blond and motioned for him to follow as they moved away from his friends. Cloud closed his eyes before following the older boy.

Gaia, Gaia, Gaia…

"So what's up?" Vossler asked once they were a little away from the group. He peered at the blond curiously, mirth shining in his eyes.

"Um. This is kind of ah…random. I uh, feel pretty stupid actually." Cloud stuttered, wishing the world would just swallow him up. Vossler didn't say anything; he just folded his arms and let the boy continue. "The dance. Do you wanna go to that um, dance thing with me? Well it's probably m-more of a group thing really but uh… F-Friday?" He blurted out quickly.

He felt his heart drop when the brunette didn't say anything for a while, but just stared at him with an amused expression.

Cloud really felt like dying when the other boy broke out into a fit of laughter. He felt his whole body blush as he stood there, humiliated. He eventually made a small noise in the back of his closing throat and frowned. "O…kay then, I'm gonna go." He said, turning to do as he said. The still laughing boy grabbed his arm and pulled him back.

"No, no Cloud, stop." Vossler breathed out, gaining a grip on his laughter. He stood up straight and looked at the blond apologetically. "That was just the funniest way I've ever been asked out before."

"I didn't…ask you out." Cloud mumbled, embarrassed but not humiliated anymore.

"You did. And I'm glad. Yeah, I'll go with you the 'dance thing'." Vossler stated boldly. Cloud looked up, self-consciously, and gazed at the other shyly.

"Really?" He asked and Vossler laughed again.

"Yeah, really. Who wouldn't?"

"Okay then… Great." Cloud smiled again. He looked at the clock on the school wall. "Um, I have to go now but-"

"Do I get your number or?" Vossler interrupted the boy. Cloud was momentarily stupefied for a minute but then found his senses and nodded. He gave Vossler his number clumsily and the older boy smiled.

"Okay then. I'll be seeing ya, Cloud." He saluted. Cloud nodded again, feeling like he was being too courtly.

"Yeah, see ya." He gave an awkward nod and turned to leave. Looking back once, he saw that Vossler had made his way back to his friends. He smiled to himself and made for the gate, trying not to cringe.

"Idiot!" He whispered, shuddering.

He felt happy though. Well, more satisfied than happy.

* * *

The next morning Cloud felt good. It was a good night, he had very little homework and his mom was in great form. She had made him dinner and then they just chatted all night. He knew it was lame but he loved times like that, when they could act like a normal family. It was something to be cherished; considering.

He spotted Zack from across the library and made his way over to the empty desk beside him. Zack practically beamed when he saw the blond. "Hey, hey Cloudy. Oh Gaia, is that… a smile on your face? Oh wow… I better get a camera for this. Hmm… now where is it." He leaned into the others face, not giving considering to personal space.

"Ah, move back," Cloud hissed, though there was good humour in his voice.

"Soooooo," Zack cooed, ignoring him. "Any particular reason you're all smiley and gooey?" Then he lifted a finger and pressed it to the boy's nose. "Did you do the dirty with someone? Oh you did didn't you? Who was I then, huh?" Cloud pushed him away and was about to answer when he was suddenly glomped from behind.

"Hey hey Cloouuuud! Glad you_ finally_ saw the light. Friday is gonna be sooooo fun now that you're not being a moaner looser anymore!" Yuffie yelled, hugging the boy. Cloud gave a small chuckle, prying her hands from his neck. "Anyway, I have to go do important things but you are awesome!" She said, standing up and skipping out of the room. That girl had way too much energy, in Cloud's opinion.

"Ah, so I guess you're going to the dance then? That's great Chocobo, you don't need a date to have fun after all, it's just like a normal night. But with crap music, lame decorations, uh teachers and…non-alcoholic punch." Zack slowed down at the last part, shrugging sheepishly. Cloud smiled, scratching the back of his ear. "Huh, what? Is there something in my gross teeth or something?" Zack asked, seeing the blonde's awkwardness.

"Well actually, I have a…someone to go with now now." Cloud smiled, looking at his friend. _Not for approval. _Zack's smile faltered a little and he leaned back a bit.

"Yoooou do?" He questioned in mock wonder. Cloud pouted, slightly put off by the disbelief, but nodded. "Whoa, first the smileys and now this. Are you sure you're the real chocobo head? You look like him but…Hmmm, well who is it then?"

Cloud licked his lips, suddenly feeling awkward. "It's Vossler, actually." He breathed out. He watched as Zack's eyes widened and then narrowed. The raven haired boy picked up a pencil from his desk and began to chew on it. Cloud gave him a puzzled look.

"Reeeeally?" Zack asked, trying to keep his voice from sounding scathing. Cloud shrugged. "Did he ask you yesterday?"

"No, I asked him, actually. Weird right?" Cloud answered, cringing at the memory. Even if it worked out well, it was still embarrassing.

"You asked? Okay really, you look like my little chocobo but I don't think you are. You have the eyes and adorable chubby cheeks but the personality is seriously not fitting..." The older teen's joke didn't have the humour behind it. Cloud could see his chiselled jaw clenching. Why?

_Did it feel satisfying?_

"Zack, are you… is something wrong?" The smaller boy queried, searching the other's face.

"Hmm, well that's my question. Maybe if I pulled your hair the mask would come off" Zack answered, trying to allay the boys curiosity. Cloud didn't respond. "Ah, no nothing's wrong chocobo-head… it's just random. Takes a few seconds to get into my skull."

"I know it is? I didn't even know what I was doing. He's nice and Yuffie was mad and I felt guilty so I just…asked him." The blond waved his arms in the air to emphasize his point. Zack didn't show as much enthusiasm as his friend. Not at all.

"Well that was pretty brave. You could have looked like a reeeeaaaal idiot." Zack stated coolly. Cloud felt his stomach drop. Idiot? That was kind of harsh...

"Oh, thanks… Why are you being so…are you in a bad mood or something?" Cloud asked, all the mirth gone from his eyes. Zack blew some hair out of his face, clicking the pencil against his lip.

"No, it's just that it seems a little strange that you would ask some random person to the dance just because you didn't want to go alone. You didn't have to get a date, y'know? It's just a party the same as any other…" Zack couldn't hide the surliness from his voice. Cloud arched his brow, taken back by the other's patronizing attitude.

"Well I didn't just ask him because of the dance. I think I like Vossler. He's really nice. I just never really thought about it before but y'know why not?." Cloud answered, feeling like he was being interrogated. "Anyway, people do ask random people to these things. Reno and Yuffie did. I don't see the problem with it."

"Eh, well it's kinda different because Reno and Yuffie have hooked up with their dates before. They didn't ask some stranger..." Zack retorted.

"I didn't either!" Cloud snapped.

"Okay then Cloudy. That's just what it seems like to me is all I was saying." Zack held up his hands in defence but Cloud could see the self-righteous look in his eyes. He felt his temper rise.

"Whatever Fair. It's none of your business then." He muttered, turning away from the older teen.

"Hey, don't get bitchy blondie. I' just saying that maybe if you just thought about things a little better, use that brain of yours, you could avoid trouble." Zack clicked his tongue. Cloud stared straight forward for a minute before asking.

"What do you mean by that?" Calmly.

"I'm just saying. If you had been more careful before then maybe that whole thing with Seifer-" but he didn't get to finish the sentence as the blond stood up sharply and without looking at him, turned and left the library. Some other student's shot him puzzled looks but were ignored.

Zack ran a hand through his hair. He looked at the pencil in his hand and chucked it across the room violently, earning himself a few more odd looks and stares. Well he didn't really care. What the hell was Cloud's problem? He was so stubborn and just didn't like being wrong about things. Zack was damned if he was going to let him ask a _senior_ out without some questions. That wasn't how it worked; he was just looking out for him like he always did.

_You were a jerk though._

* * *

Cloud wiped the dust from his shirt, scanning the material for any more. He was dressed in a white pressed shirt with black pants. It was a semi-formal dance. You had to look posh but not too much and he was nervous his outfit didn't fit the quota.

It was Friday night and he was leaving in twenty minutes to meet Vossler at 'Dilly Dallies', not wanting the boy to come to his home. It was a little embarrassing considering Vossler was a pretty rich guy and he…wasn't. Anyway, it was easier to meet him somewhere he knew and not have to direct him.

He picked up his wallet from his dresser, checking that he had everything. He always seemed to forget something. He picked up his phone, smiling when he saw he had a message. He and Vossler had been texting for the past two days, and he had found that he had enjoyed talking to him. Vossler was really down to earth and friendly, even if he could be a bit serious, and Cloud was glad to be getting to know him.

He was also happy to have someone to talk to who wasn't constantly inquiring as to why he and Zack weren't speaking at the moment.

Yes, since their fight Wednesday, Zack and Cloud had stayed away from each other completely. It was the loneliest Cloud had felt in a long time but he didn't feel like speaking to the raven haired boy yet. Zack had hurt him. Badly. He had basically confirmed Clouds worst fear that the incident with Seifer _was _his fault. Cloud had known it was already but hearing it from Zack was just…painful. Literally painful. He had left school early that day because he was so upset. He didn't understand; as far as he knew Zack and Vossler were friendly enough so there was no reason for the boy to react the way he did.

He was still going to the dance though. He didn't want to let anyone down.

Cloud grabbed his jacket and exited his room.

"Mom, I'm heading out." He shouted absentmindedly. He waited for a conformation and when he didn't get one he called again. "Mom?" No answer.

Feeling a lump form in his throat, he walked down the hall and into his mother's room. He knocked on her closed door, "Mom?" After receiving no answer he slowly grasped the handle, feeling sick.

"Mom?"

* * *

"This place is great Yuf!" Zack said to the small girl. She just beamed back.

"Damn right it is, Fair. Hnnnnn, I'm just extraordinarily talented."

Tifa rolled her eyes at the girl before turning to Zack. She ran her hand along his arm and gave him a smile.

"You okay hun?" She asked softly, noticing his attention was directed towards the rest of the room. He shook his head and smiled at her.

"Course I am." He leaned in and gave her a kiss. Tifa laughed and shrugged him away playfully. He had been very full-on this week and even though she was enjoying it, it was a little strange; as though he were trying to distract himself. The thought tore her insides.

"Hey, you want a drink?" She nodded her head and Zack made for the punch bowel while she turned to talk with Yuffie and the other girls.

Zack reached into his pocket and fingered the flask there. It was a school function so obviously there was no alcohol. He had a remedy for that- like fuck he wasn't getting drunk tonight. He shook his head and took the scowl off his face. He was going to have fun. His girlfriend was a stunner- especially in the long silk number she was wearing that night, he was young, healthy, handsome and with friends. Everything else could just go away for now.

He picked up the ladle and was pouring one of the drinks when he spotted Vossler across the room. Smirking, he decided to say hello to his _classmate._

Zack made his way through the crowd of people, smiling the whole way.

_Oh, you are a jerk._

"Vossler!" He said, with perhaps too much enthusiasm. Said brunette turned at the mention of his name and raised a brow.

"Zack." He said, turning and rubbing his hands together. "What's up?"

Zack shook his head, still smiling. His jawbone was starting to hurt.

"Oh nothing really, just said I'd say hi to my best buddies _date_." He looked around. "And where is the little chocobo-head?"

"Oh," the smile fell from Vossler's face, "you didn't her?" He looked at Zack strangely. Zack felt his heart skip a beat at the words.

"What? Something's wrong with Cloud?" He asked calmly, but with a hint of urgency. Vossler leaned closer to him and talked lowly.

"He called me earlier, his mother had to be rushed to hospital this just a few hours ago and he went with her. I offered to go with him but I think that made him uncomfortable. He told me to come here and explain his absence. Didn't want to ruin my night I suppose." Vossler explained, his stoic features taking on a look of sorrow.

Zack felt sick. Like guilt was visibly manifesting itself in his stomach and planning to escape through his throat. Why didn't he know this? Why didn't Cloud call him? He told Vossler? This was all wrong. Why was he just thinking of himself? Cloud was alone and terrified and…Gaia. He had been such a dick.

"Zack?" Vossler questioned the dazed boy, shaking his shoulder. He looked at him for a moment before running a hand over his face.

"Eh sorry bot that. Thanks for telling me man." He said sincerely, patting the other boy on the arm.

"Well I should go tell Yuffie about this but are you…?" Vossler asked, letting his sentence go unfinished. Zack nodded his head before making his way back to Tifa who was now at the punch bowl.

"Hey." She said when she saw him. "Where were you?"

"With Vossler." Zack breathed, "Tif," he sighed, "I have to leave."

"What? Why?" She questioned in astonishment. Zack grimaced but continued.

"It's Cloud." He stated and noticed how her face strangely twisted. "His mom got taken into hospital again and he's alone and I just think I should go see him." He said. She closed her mouth and looked away. Zack could see that she was trying to hold in her anger.

"Tif-"

"You should go to him then." She said, her voice edging on shrill.

"You sure?" He asked. She closed her eyes and nodded. He didn't really think she was sure but at that time the words were all he needed.

"Okay Tif, I'm so sorry but you know everyone else here so I think you can manage without my sparkling presence for a while, right?" She just nodded again and gave a small smile. Zack kissed her cheek and headed for the door.

"You need to go to him." She said quietly, watching his silhouette getting smaller.

* * *

The beeping of the heart monitor was contradictory. It was comforting to hear that the heart of your loved one was still beating but it was such a horrible sound. Beep, beep, beep. Like a timer counting down life. It could stop any minute.

It would stop eventually.

Cloud ran his thumb over his mother's bony hand. Trying to avoid looking at her corpse-like sleeping face. He felt a lump rise in his throat. Trying to hold in the tears in his eyes, he bent down and kissed her hand before standing up and walking out of the hospital room.

He needed to get out of there.

Walking down the corridor, Cloud felt himself almost become inebriating on the smell of disinfectant. He hated that smell. That's what Hell would smell like. The teen tried to cheer himself up by looking at the pictures on the wall. All painted by previous patients. He knew those pictures inside out by now.

He entered the main guest lobby and took a seat on one of the benches by the wall. The place was vacant now; just the pitter-patter of nurse's footsteps could be heard in the distance.  
Bringing his hands up towards his knees, he exhaled shakily. He was in shock. When he had entered that bedroom and saw his mother's prone form, hanging halfway off the bed, he was sure she was dead. His world just went dark for a minute and he couldn't breathe. He gathered himself together enough to check her pulse and could have sworn Shiva herself had come to his aid when he had found one. He wasted no time in calling for an ambulance and his mother was brought to hospital where she was quickly stabilised.

The Geostigma in her system had polluted some nerves in her brain, causing her to lose consciousness and weakened her breathing. She may have died if Cloud hadn't gotten there on time.

He felt terrible.

There he was, worrying about a stupid fucking dance when his mom was suffering like that. How could he be so selfish? He had more important things in his life, he just couldn't act like other kids his age and he needed to accept that.

He didn't care if he was ever happy again and would gladly trade his happiness for his moms health. No questions asked.

Sniffing, he wiped at his face with his shirt, burying it in his hands.

"Cloud?" The blond youth jumped when he heard a voice. Looking up with wide glossy eyes, he was surprised to see Zack standing there. Humble, with his arms hanging loosely by his side. Cloud didn't say anything, just swallowed and continued to look at him.

"Hey." Zack said, walking over to him. Cloud gave a small smile.

"Hey," he replied softly. His voice was blocked with phlegm and he had to clear it before he spoke again." What are you doing here?"

Zack sighed and sat down beside him on the bench, not touching him. "Vossler told me. Is she…"

"She's fine." Cloud said, and then he chuckled dryly, "just a scare, the doctor said." Zack made an 'ah' sound, throwing his head back.

"Oh well then what's the problem then? If it was 'just a scare'." He mocked the doctor's voice and Cloud snorted in agreement.

Every time his mother got very ill the doctors would fix her up and express happily to Cloud that it was 'just a scare', like it was a good thing. It soon annoyed the blond and he confided this to Zack. It had been a dark joke between them since then.

"It makes my day actually." Cloud said sardonically. Zack made a huh sound and then there was silence.

After a few minutes, Zack moved closer to the blond and nudged him.

"Sorry feather-head." He said sincerely. "I've been a bit of an ass these last few days. Well a big one actually but that's not really the point. Just… think I was man pms-ing or something." He let his shoulders fall.

"It's okay Zack. You were right anyway." Cloud sighed, leaning his chin on his knees. Zack furrowed his brows.

"Right?"

"Yeah," Cloud confirmed, he could feel his throat getting tighter "I cause trouble. I'm selfish. I caused what happened to Seifer and now this…" He broke his words off, leaning forward and taking a long breath, rubbing his fingers across his forehead.

"Oh, hey," Zack whispered, grabbing the boy's shoulders and pulling him back, "Cloud. If there was one person in this whole city who could honestly say they weren't selfish it would be you. Seriously." Cloud just let out a sarcastic snort. "Oh don't do that Cloudy. I didn't mean what I said that day. Definitely not like that anyway. And… even if you wanted to have fun sometimes. It's not a crime… if it was the rest of us would be off seriously fucked." But Cloud only stayed silent, shaking his head. Zack pulled him closer and placed a hand on his head. Cloud let him.

"I was scared." Cloud mumbled, wrapping his arms around himself and letting his head fall back. "It was horrible. She really looked dead this time… that's what she's going to look like when..." Zack silenced him before he could finish.

"No point thinking that now, okay. There bad thoughts." He whispered back, running a hand through the distraught boy's hair. "And don't think I'm not mad at you for not calling. You have to call me blondie, even if we're fighting. You can't be alone when things like this happen, okay?" Cloud nodded, chuckling a bit.

"Alright then. Anything else you wanna tell me?" Zack muttered softly.

"No."

* * *

_The laptop screen illuminated his pale features, making his teeth shine eerily as he opened his mouth and smiled._

_Sephiroth couldn't hide the mirth in his usually emotionless eyes as he scanned the screen in front of him. This was perfect, just as he had planned it._

_In front of him was an email he had received earlier, three simple words that held so much promise._

'**_Who are you?'_**

_Let the games begin._


	9. IX

**Disclaimer: Dont own Final Fantasy or any other Square Enix character.**

* * *

_Humans weren't patient. No, they just wanted everything done swiftly and without hesitation. That was probably why everything in the world was so sloppy. The only thing impressive about the planet was its natural organization; something humans had no control over._

_Sephiroth had always been fascinated with the science of the world, the way everything, even the smallest worm, had a niche; a role to play in order to preserve life on the planet. It was all so intricately balanced and meticulous. He appreciated that._

_It was a waste, he thought, to see the way the vermin that were the human race used and abused the planet. Rushing and consuming and poisoning and polluting. They were going to destroy themselves eventually. It was in their nature, they could avoid it like a fish could avoid swimming._  
_Sephiroth was so much better than everyone else- truly a god among men. He was patient. The last three days had been a tribute to that._

_He hadn't been sure if Cloud would try to contact his alias through the email address he had supplied the boy with and when he did Sephiroth realized the enormity of the opportunity he had been given. He didn't want to waste it and so since then he had been working tirelessly to answer that golden question, who was Cloud Strife's father?_

_It was a surprisingly difficult task, even with his connections._

_He hadn't slept in several days and his eyes were sensitive from reading documents and staring at computer screens for hours on end. It had been worth it though, as he managed to painstakingly piece together the information he required. What interesting information it was too._

_Shinra had many secrets, some that even the average employees didn't know. Sephiroth wasn't an average employee. He knew that the company had a secret surveillance of the city. Every big bar, restaurant and club was monitored in case of terrorist or anti-Shinra behaviour. From bits of conversations he had overheard while following the boy, Sephiroth had gathered that the boy had been the product of a drunken night out and so the General had spent days looking the footage from different places during the week in which Cloud had been conceived, hoping to find out who Sky had slept with. It was tedious and frustrating and had he been a normal man he would have quit after the first fifteen hours. However, he was not a normal man and did not succumb to pathetic human weaknesses. He persevered and his work had paid off when he had finally caught sight of Sky, much to his surprise, in a bar in sector 7._

**_7th Heaven_**

_That was where his angel had been conceived. It was perfect. Cloud was truly an angel sent from the heavens. For him._

_He had watched as Sky, rather beautiful in her youth, had been socializing with friends at the bar when a blonde man had entered through the front door and took a seat in the corner. _

_Over the night, the girl had become inebriated with vodka and she and the strange man, who seemed to be in quite a stupor himself, had begun talking. A few hours later they both exited into one of the rooms provided by the pub where they had clearly copulated. It wasn't romantic, in fact it was filthy and demeaning behaviour, but it had produced perfection. How ironic._

_He used a tracking device on a Shinra computer to name the mysterious, yet oddly familiar man. The information he had found was interesting… and fortunate._

_Basch Von Ronsenburg was the name given to Cloud Strife's father. The man was famous in Shinra, but for all the wrong reasons. He used to be a SOLDIER, a head one at that, until around thirteen years earlier when he was accused and found guilty of the murder of the Dalmascan King and sentenced to death. The records of all these events were destroyed by the authorities so that no one would ever know where the man went or how he died. This was done for two reason; the first being that Shinra did not want the public to know that a SOLDIER member was responsible for the death of a king and secondly because there was a lot of suspicion around the event. There had even been rumours that the SOLDIER was framed._

_Sephiroth didn't care for the truth. He was ecstatic with what he found. Cloud wouldn't be able to find out if Basch was alive or not and this would make the youth more vulnerable to believe him. The boy was too innocent to really comprehend the thought that he was being lied to. He would look up information about his father and find that he was real, he was a Shinra member and perhaps that he had been in Midgar fifteen years ago. The rest was a mind game. He was good at mind games._

_He smirked and picked up the photograph on his nightstand. He brought it closer to his face, studying it intimately._

_So he had his bait. Time to lure the prey._

* * *

"Okay. Anything else?" Cloud asked as he placed the cup on the nightstand beside her bed. Sky had just arrived home from hospital and Cloud was working his hardest to make her comfortable. She smiled and shook her head.

"You sure?" He pushed, "I can make soup, or cut up some apple slices. I know you like that after the medicine, I-"

"Cloud." Sky snapped hoarsely. His eyes widened he shut his mouth instantly. He fiddled with the sleeve of his shirt, looking down apologetically. She closed her mouth and exhaled. "Honey, I'm just tired now, okay? I'm just going to sleep for a while." She rasped with a small smile.

Truth was, she was feeling a great amount of guilt herself. She knew Cloud had been going to that dance with a boy he liked as he had told her about it the night he asked him. She remembered seeing the light in his eyes as he talked. He looked so young then, carefree, like a fifteen year old should be. Then her damn sickness had gone and ruined everything for him.

Sky had come to terms with her illness a long time ago, she knew it would eventually take her and she had accepted that. She was tired, her body was weak and it was wearing down. A part of her wanted nothing more than to close her eyes and raise a white flag to her sickness, surrendering from the pain. She couldn't do that though, not yet. Cloud wasn't ready for her to go. She could see it in him, his longing for her was still too strong and if she left now it would be like leaving a lamb in a storm and watching it struggle to survive. He would be ready eventually, and when she knew he was going to be okay, that's when she would leave. When her child was alright.

"Okay. Shout if you want anything." Cloud said softly. She nodded, closing her eyes, and he made his way towards the door, shutting the light off on his way out.

Cloud allowed a few tears to slip out of his eyes as he walked the short distance to his room. Sniffling, he walked inside and dropped down on his bed. He had stayed in the hospital for most of last few nights which resulted in him not getting much sleep. He hadn't realised how tired he was until now. His eyes became heavy with lethargy and he slowly slipped into the first stages of sleep.

* * *

_The keys clanging on the coffee table broke the quiescent atmosphere of the apartment. Sephiroth pushed his hair out of his face as he made his way towards his bedroom. He had been at work all day and the leather of his suit was tight and damp from his perspiration._

_Once in the bedroom, he discarded the outfit and made his way into the bathroom. He turned on the shower, watching as a rush of high pressure water fell from the nozzle. He could hardly suppress a moan as the hot liquid fell in rivulets over his body. It felt like all the tension from the last few days was washing down the drain._

_Standing there, simply enjoying the flow of water over his muscles, his thoughts soon turned to Cloud. He missed him. He had spent the last ten days either working or researching the boy's father so he hadn't gotten to see him at all. It was a disturbing feeling, one that he wouldn't grow accustom to._

_Once he was satisfactorily clean, the silver haired man shut the shower off, roughly dried himself with a white towel and threw on a grey bathrobe._

_He sauntered out to his couch and turned on his television, the evening news was on and he half listened to it as he picked up his laptop. He switched the computer on and once it was loaded he went straight to the live-feed camera, scowling when he was met with a blank screen._

_The laptop he had so kindly supplied Cloud with had a rather sinister trait. It was mostly used by Turks in order to supply a visual of a certain place or target during a mission. The unnoticeable camera on left hand corner of the screen could be connected to another Shinra laptop and whenever the live feed was activated, one could see what was in front of the connected laptop. It could be one way or two way connection, whichever was set up. Sephiroth had set up a one way connection which meant that whenever Clouds laptop was on, he could see him without the boy knowing about it._

_The problem was that the boy never turned it on._

_He set the laptop down on the coffee table, keeping it open as he had done all the previous nights. The television droned on as he lay back against the leather of his couch, hoping the goddess would bless him that night._

* * *

The world was blurry when Cloud first opened his eyes, he blinked a couple of times to get the sleep out of his them and clear his vision. The blond sat up on his bed, wincing when he realized his arm had gone dead from the position he slept in. He rubbed it harshly as he looked at the clock on his dressing table.

"One fifteen." He mumbled, running a hand across his face. He hadn't meant to fall asleep so early and now he knew he wouldn't fall asleep again for a few hours. Great. He had school tomorrow which meant he was going to be half asleep all day long.

Feeling a pressure on his bladder, the blond got up off the bed and made his way to the bathroom to relieve himself. He tip-toed down the hall, listening to hear if his mother was up. He didn't hear the TV or anyone walking around the kitchen so he presumed she was still asleep. He felt a small bit of sickness emerge from the pit of his stomach as he contemplated checking on her.

He decided to continue towards the bathroom. It was only one in the morning which meant she had only been asleep for five hours; not a worrying amount of time. He tried to make as little noise as possible as he opened the door to the bathroom and did his business.

While he was in there he had decided to take a quick shower and change into a loose T-shirt and boxers he kept in the towel closet. He returned to his room feeling fresh and unfortunately wide awake. The teen sat on his bed and looked around his room mindlessly for something to do. He was contemplating reading the next chapter of the book he had been reading before his eyes caught sight of something more... interesting.

Despite his better judgment, Cloud had sent an email to the mysterious address he had been given a couple of weeks prior. It was a potentially insidious decision but there was no way he could have avoided it. He had spent the best part of a week deliberating over what he would do with the address, weighing the good and bad aspects of what making contact with this person might be.  
This…person was pretending to be his father. Why? How? For what reason?

Cloud couldn't comprehend why there would be someone out there who was pretending to be his father. The idea was ludicrous. He didn't have any enemies; he had never done anything to deserve one. The idea that it was someone he knew messing with him was even more upsetting.  
Then again, the idea that this could really be his father was just unrealistic. His father wanted to know him now? What would that mean? He went over all the questions a thousand times, until his head hurt and his mind became archaic. This whole situation made his brain ache, it was mind boggling. He still hadn't used any of the things he had received, save the laptop, and he wouldn't until he knew the truth about this person.

He had initially decided against doing anything with the email he had received, rationalizing that nothing good would come from it. He had stuck with that decision for a few days until one morning; he just woke up and decided against his erstwhile decision. In order to allay his curiosity, he had sent a message to the stranger, enquiring simply as to who they were.

Cloud bit his lip as he got up from the bed. He walked over and crouched down in front of the laptop, sucking his lip under his teeth as he contemplated it. He had been preoccupied with the dance and his mom for the past few weeks and had never gotten a chance to check to see if he had received a reply from the stranger. The teen felt butterflies emerge in his stomach as he lifted the computer and set it on his dressing table. He felt the tension in his body culminating when he leaned his knee against the seat and pressed the button to turn the screen on. His stomach lurched at the sound of the machine whirring to life. It only took a few minutes for the computer to start up-Shinra computers were pretty efficient- and all Cloud had to do was check his email in order to solve this bounding problem.

"Probably no reply," he mumbled as he stroked the keyboard. He shook his head, sitting down fully on his seat and logged into his account. His stomach felt like it was in his throat as he waited for his page to load. He tried to will away the impudent excitement he was feeling by telling himself that the inbox would be empty. The screen clicked to life and Cloud tried to remain sanguine as the screen portrayed that he had received a reply from YSM.

"Gaia!" He whispered. He stared at the screen until it started to blur, contemplating what to do.  
He eventually decided that there was no point in stalling, he had to read this message; for his own edification if nothing else. He clicked on the message and waited for the words to appear on screen**.**

**_I know that this is probably the wrong way to make myself known to you and I am genuinely sorry for any pain or disorientation I am causing. I am no more than I have already stated; your father. I don't expect you to trust me and I would not take it badly if decided to halt any further contact with me. However, if this is to be my last message to you then I feel there are some things I need to say, perhaps for purely selfish reasons._**

**_I am your father. I have known this for quite some time. There are reasons we can't be introduced in person, reasons you just can't be aware of yet. If I could have it any other way I would, you must believe that. I do love you. You can doubt everything else I say but you cannot deny my love for you. I don't want to scare you but you should know that I have watched you from time to time and I am proud of the young man you have become. I know you are going through a tough time with your mother and I apologize for not being there for you and I hope the paraphernalia I gave you will help your life in some way. There is not much left for me to say but if you want to know more, then just ask. I'll understand if you don't reply and I will not make any further contact if it is against your wished._**

**_Goodbye Cloud_**

Cloud wiped at his eyes, coughing softly. He ran a hand across his forehead before sinking it into his hair. He leaned his elbow on the table and re-read the message. This was too much. Was this actually his father? He seemed so genuine; sorry. Could he be a fraud?

Cloud inhaled harshly and leaned his head into his folded arms on the dresser. This was all so damn confusing.

* * *

_The beeping coming from his computer brought Sephiroth out of his trance. He placed his glass of scotch down on the table in front of him before leaning forward to look at the laptop. His eyes widened as he stared at the screen in front of him. Cloud was turning on the computer? Finally. He had waited for this for over two weeks._

_He smirked as the screen in front of him turned to static before eventually clearing. Two blue eyes stared back through the lens, not directly at the camera as it was situated on the top corner of the laptop but they still seemed to stare through him._

_Beautiful boy_

_Sephiroth smiled adoringly as he raked his eyes over the form on screen, studying the glowing skin and wide eyes._

_Innocent eyes._

_Cloud was standing up which meant that Sephiroth was given a good view of the slim torso. The boy leaned against a chair and brought his stomach intimately closer to the camera. He felt so close that Sephiroth imagined he could feel the heat beneath his fingers as he ran them across the screen. _

_Clouds stomach was lost beneath the loose shirt but that only turned Sephiroth on even more. It was like a challenge. He liked challenges._

_He watched curiously as Cloud shifted around a bit before pulling out the seat and sitting on it. The General could see the tension in Clouds face as he stared worriedly at the screen. He loved how his expressions were so expressive, like the boy couldn't hide what he was feeling if he tried. He noticed the teen looked sad, his eyes were dull and watery and he felt a pang in his chest. His boy shouldn't be so sad. It was probably that whore of a mother: ruining the boy's life again._

_He watched on curiously as Cloud typed something quickly, looking nervous as he did. 'He must only be looking at his email now' Sephiroth realized with excitement. He had thought the boy had already seen it and gotten too scared to reply. He mimicked Cloud's expressions as the boy read the screen in front of him. Cloud eyes widened and his lips parted. He felt his groin stiffen at the emerging emotions appearing on the boy's face. All because of him. The blond began to breathe heavier and his brows furrowed in sadness. Sephiroth leaned back and got comfortable as he watched the boy become flustered and agitated. He didn't feel sorry for him this time though, it would all be for the teen's own good eventually._

_After taking a few minutes to compose himself, the blond pulled his head up and shifted in his seat. Sephiroth took in the boy in his distressed state. Ruffled hair, puffy eyes and a deep frown on his lips. He looked like a cherub in the portraits of angels in hell; wrong but beautiful all the same. He felt his temper flare when Cloud made a motion to close the laptop. He couldn't end it now; he didn't have enough of him yet. He waited with baited breath as Cloud's hand hovered over the camera. He could see the indecisiveness in the boy's face and willed him to change his mind._

_It worked._

_Cloud stood up quickly and walked over to his window. He was wearing boxers so his youthful legs were exposed. The blonde's legs were short but finely muscled, probably from the running he did almost every day. Sephiroth thought they were perfect, especially when the boxers rode up on one leg and exposed the curve of Clouds ass cheek. It looked so soft and pale and virginal, he felt his mouth water at the thought of running his finger through the area where the boy's leg and ass met. There were so much special places on Clouds body that he longed to touch; he would have fun exploring them when the time was right._

_The blond boy stood by the window for a moment and Sephiroth found it fascinating that he was standing by the spot he himself had been so many times before. They were connected now, but it was only the beginning._

* * *

'Just turn it off Cloud' was the phrase Cloud kept repeating to himself. He looked out through the glass of his window, scanning all the buildings he could see. It was strange to think that his father was in one of those buildings, maybe not in Midgar but somewhere in the world. He didn't believe it. It was too unreal.

The glare of the computer on his dresser taunted him, and he walked back over to it quickly. He read that damn email again and then again. He sat back down on his seat, wiping some dust from the table as he thought. The email seemed really sincere. Was this actually his father? It was starting to seem like the only explanation, he felt flutters emerge in his stomach at the thought.

What should he do?

The blond thought over it for at least twenty minutes until he finally decided what to do. His chest expanded as he took in a mouthful of air and sat up straight, manoeuvring the screen so the shine from the light bulb didn't glint off it so much. He ran his tongue along his teeth as he typed.

* * *

_Sephiroth's heart pounded as he watched Cloud type something into his laptop. He was ecstatic that he didn't shut him off and now it seemed that the boy was going to write something. He watched as Cloud stopped typing and closed his eyes before pressing a button quickly. He stared at Cloud for a minute, noticing how attractive he looked in his complexity, with his lips tight and his glossy eyes shut. It reminded him of-_

_The icon flashing on the side of his screen forced him to turn his attention away from the boy. He widened his eyes as he opened the message box which told him that he had one new email._  
_"Good boy." He murmured. The email Cloud sent was short and simple._

**_Why should I believe you?_**

_Sephiroth was not deterred by this, it was predictable. Humans were predictable and Cloud was predictable because he was human. He quickly typed a reply but stopped himself just before he pressed the send button. He couldn't reply too fast, that would make him seem suspect. He growled lightly as he sat back against the couch, watching Cloud through the screen and feeling like he was being denied the right to communicate with him. It wouldn't always be like this, he reminded himself; one day there would be nothing between him and his cherub._

_He stared at Cloud as the boy stared back at the screen. He would be content watching Cloud for a while but there was a danger that the teen would turn the computer off and he would be left alone in longing. Realizing his choices were few, he moved the laptop to his lap and shifted on the couch to get more comfortable._

_Cloud continued to sit by the screen, looking like a lost puppy and Sephiroth continued to study every physical feature available to him._

* * *

Cloud sighed as he waited for a reply, knowing full well that he wouldn't receive one tonight. He still felt a compulsion to wait and see for a while, and so that's what he did. He fiddled with the laptop, realising that he had never really looked at it before. He clicked on the internet button and when the MOOGLE search engine appeared on screen he typed in an online library site he knew. He scanned the new releases and when he found a book of interest he decided to read it for a while...just to see.

His back felt stiff so he decided to get the computer charger and lie on his bed while he read.

* * *

_Sephiroth was enjoying the privilege of watching the creature on the screen until he saw Cloud push his chair out and stand up. His stomach churned at the thought of not being able to watch Cloud for the rest of the night. He couldn't be teased like this. He calmed down when he saw the boy come back into view with a black wire in his hand. The screen went out of focus and when it cleared again Sephiroth could see that Cloud was simply moving onto the bed._

_"Good boy." He smiled. The screen went blurry again as Cloud placed the item on his lap and fixed a pillow behind himself. He pressed his head back against the pillow and Sephiroth reckoned he really did look like an angel then, with his hair spread out against the pillow; like a halo. The big blue eyes were set on the screen and Sephiroth guessed he was reading something._

_He watched for an hour as Clouds facial expressions changed and warped as he read. It was amusing and Sephiroth didn't even feel the time passing, literally getting lost in the other's eyes. He started to notice Clouds eye-lids getting heavier and realised that the boy would shut off the connection soon in order to sleep._

_He wouldn't let that happen._

_Pulling the sleeve of his dressing gown back, Sephiroth placed his fingers over the keypad and pressed the send button for the message he had written earlier. He watched with satisfaction as Cloud became more animated when he received the email._

* * *

The beeping of his computer startled Cloud and he felt his heart rise to his mouth when he realised that he had received an email. He willed himself to be more sanguine as he reached out a hand to open the mail box.

**_YSM: have no way to answer that. I can only hope that you choose to trust me but I have no intention of forcing you. I am your father Cloud._**

Cloud ignored the ever rising lump in his throat as he quickly typed back a reply.

**_Why did you choose now to make contact with me?_**

It was bad to indulge in this when he knew so little but he couldn't help it, it was the only way he could stop the torment his mind had been going through ever since this situation emerged. He widened his eyes when he received another reply.

**_YSM: That is hard to answer. I believe I finally just decided that you should know who I am and that I know who you are. No boy should grow up without his father and I suppose I wanted to try to fix that for you in a small way. It may also be because of my own selfishness._**  
Cloud sniffed and placed a hand under his nose, feeling his eyes become watery again. What was wrong with him lately; he wasn't a girl! He sat up straight on the bed and re-read the message. He had imagined his father saying this so much when he was a kid and now that it was happening it all just felt like a dream. He could barely see the screen as he typed a reply.

**_you didn't have to send me all that stuff. Why didn't you just call or something? it makes it hard to trust you when you are so secretive._**

A few more seconds, another reply. Cloud couldn't believe this was actually happening.

**_YSM: There are some factors you cannot be aware of yet, but they make contacting you harder than it needs to be. I also thought that sending you those gifts would make me seem less of a threat. I see that that may have backfired on me. I apologise for frightening you._**

Cloud bit his lip; this all seemed a little edgy. Factors? What did that mean? This guy was talking like someone out of the movies. He seemed genuine at the same time. Cloud was confused.

**_okay, im sorry but I need more time to think this through. Can I ask you your name._**

He almost regretted sending that message and felt nervous as he waited for a reply. He got one a few minutes later.

**_YSM: Basch Von Ronsenburg. Goodnight Cloud._**

Cloud mouthed the name, not believing that he had been given one so easily. He decided that he -would find out about this name-if it was real- and then decide what to do about this situation.

* * *

_Sephiroth smiled as the screen went blank._

_"Good night, love." He whispered. Cloud would look up the name and find that Basch was real and very little else. That small bit of evidence would be enough to have Cloud trusting in his false persona and he would play right into Sephiroth's hands._

_The General didn't really know why he was doing this; he could easily just take the youth whenever he wanted. It was just so amusing, watching the blond struggle with issues that were rooted so deep in himself and releasing the emotions as a result. Such strong emotions, all for him; caused by him, directed at him...him. Cloud belonged to him. His body and his mind belonged to Sephiroth now and he would never give them back._

_Sephiroth laughed as he pressed the replay button on his laptop, dragging his hand down towards his crotch as the screen lit up in blue and yellow._

_Cloud was his._


	10. X

**Disclaimer: Don't own Final Fantasy or any other square Enix character!**

* * *

Cloud leaned his head heavily on the table, completely oblivious to the lesson being thought at the top of the classroom. He was tired, having had only four hours of sleep the night before, and the patter of heavy rain against the window didn't help the abysmal atmosphere at all.

The blond let himself drift off until he was shoved back into full consciousness by the ringing of the bell, indicating the end of the school day. Cloud sighed, the day had gone on for way too long and he had some important stuff to do after school. He packed away his books and shouldered his bag before making his way out of the room and through the corridor.

Walking through a crowded school hallway is not a fun thing to do, especially when your mind is preoccupied and you're half asleep, it can lead to embarrassing moments like letting out a girlish yelp when a large hand is placed on your shoulder.  
"Gaia." Cloud muttered, his eyes closing to hide his fright. Zack let out a chuckle, retracting his hand.

"Are you a zombie now?" He asked, arching an eyebrow in question, Cloud shook his head, cheeks tinting red.

"No," he sighed, "Just tired." Zack tilted his head and Cloud frowned when he saw the concerned look on the older teens face.

"Tired? Hmm that doesn't sound good. Everything okay?" The dark haired boy asked, moving closer to Cloud. Cloud felt goose bumps emerge on his skin when he caught the scent of the others aftershave; it had always been the same brand since Zack was thirteen and Cloud found it strangely comforting... familiar. He looked at the other and smiled a little.

"Everything's fine, I was just restless last night." He explained. Zack cocked a brow.

"Restless?" He questioned again. Cloud felt himself become irritated but tried to hide it with a small shrug.

"Don't really know why." He mumbled.

"You're an odd one chocobo-head. Sooo anyway, weirdness aside what are you doing now? Not running in that I hope." Zack stepped back and looked towards the window, observing the heavy rain. Cloud followed his eyes.

"No," he said dryly "think I'll skip that today. I might blow away." Zack laughed at the image before turning back to the smaller boy.

"Well it's your lucky day coz I'm not training either. You need a lift?" He questioned, shaking the keys wrapped around his thumb. Cloud sighed.

"Is there any point in saying no?" He drawled and Zack smirked, shaking his head. The raven haired boy swung around and placed his arm around the boy's shoulders.

"Ah, you really are smart yellow head. Of course you can't say no. You might really blow away y'know and I can't let that happen because your mom would beat my ass and I have a really nice ass so that would be a tragedy." His face twisted in mock pain as he wrapped his arm around the smaller boy's neck and pulled him along the corridor. Cloud felt his insides warm at the feeling of the others muscles against his neck and he smiled shyly as Zack began to loudly hum a tune to his favourite song, oblivious to the stares he was receiving from other students.

* * *

"Uh, seriously I'm so full I think my ears are gonna explode." Zack groaned, leaning back in his chair and patting his stomach loudly. Cloud nodded, although he didn't feel overly full. Then again, he never stuffed himself like Zack did.

The two had arrived at Clouds house an hour ago to find that Sky was in bed, much to Clouds disappointment. They decided to make some pizza and fries for dinner and eat in Clouds bedroom.

Zack looked at Cloud from his seat by the dressing table. The boy seemed spacey today and Zack didn't think it was just from tiredness. He figured that it may have something to do with Sky so he didn't ask too much questions, it was worrying him though; he just wished Cloud could be happy for a while.

He shifted his gaze around the room and raised a brow when he saw the laptop beside Clouds bed, plugged into the charger.

"I thought you said you weren't going to use any of that stuff?" Clouds eyes widened at the others sudden statement. He was about to ask what he was talking about when he remembered the laptop currently on his floor. He put his plate down beside him on the bed.

"Yeah," he said slowly, "couldn't resist I guess. Don't think it matters anyway."

"I guess not. Did that person ever try to contact you again?" Zack asked, eyeing the computer. He knew saying 'person' was harsh but he would not believe that they were really Clouds father, not without proof anyway.

Cloud shook his head. "No." He hadn't told the other about the email address he had gotten or about the conversation he had had with the stranger the night before. He felt bad for lying but he knew that Zack would freak out if he found out what he was doing and at the moment he really didn't need that distraction while he was trying to sort the situation out.

"Oh." Zack muttered; the blonde's answer didn't allay his curiosity though. Cloud was way too quiet and abrupt, something was up and Zack hoped the boy wasn't doing anything intractable. He didn't question any further though, knowing he was in a crotchety mood.

"Hm, so is it any good then?" He decided to brighten the subject. Cloud shrugged his shoulders.

"It has internet access and it's really fast, I've only really read books on it so far though." Zack made a face at the blonde's words.

"Ooooh, you're so boring Cloud," he shook his head in weary resignation, clasping his hands in front of himself. "I mean really… that's not what it's for."

"Oh, I guess I could stop doing something I enjoy doing and do something I don't enjoy doing under the guise of enjoying it?" He raised a blond brow. Zack clicked his tongue.

"Okay, way too many words for me there Cloudy. You're making me feel dumb. If you keep reading like that you'll become an old bald bookworm that nobody likes. You wouldn't want that, would you? Well, you might have too much hair to go bald but that's not the point." He babbled while looking away. Cloud let out a laugh and Zack smiled, aware of the immaturity of his statement.

Rain splashed heavily against the window, causing them both to look towards it.

"Uh, that's miserable." Zack commented, his face falling as though it were melting. "I should be going now. Angeal will kill me if I don't come home tonight. Prisoner warden." He sighed while looking back towards the boy on the bed. Cloud sat up more, giving the other a worried look.

"Do you think you'll be okay driving?" He asked, indicating towards the window, "It's bad out there."

"Don't worry chocobo, a Midgar motorist knows how to deal with the unpredictable weather." Zack stated smugly while standing up and putting on his leather jacket. His statement didn't reassure Cloud much but he still nodded while standing up too.

"Well okay...text me when you get home though." Cloud said while opening the door and waiting for the other to exit. Zack gave him a smile and walked over to the door; he reached out a hand and ruffled Clouds wafting locks.

"Oh you're such a cutie, worried about me." He snickered as he headed out of the room.

"I just don't want to get in trouble for sending you to your doom." Cloud mumbled, folding his arms and closing his eyes nonchalantly.

"Uh, I'm just going to pretend you didn't say that. Mean, mean boy." Zack grumbled. He made his way to the front door and opened it. Both the boys winced as the pounding of the rain and wind filled the apartment.

"You sure-"

"I'll be fine." Zack interrupted the blond; he gave the boy a small wave before making his way out the door. Cloud watched as the front door was pulled shut by Zack and then turned to close his own.

The blond sighed, running a hand through his hair. He felt bad because even though he was worried about Zack travelling in such weather he was also anxious for the older boy to leave. Now he could get on with what he had been waiting to do all day.

The blond went over to the laptop on the floor and picked it up. He sat down against the headboard and opened the computer, once he turned it on he had to wait while it loaded, the seconds felt like hours for the anxious teen. When the screen finally did load he wasted no time in connecting to the internet and typing in the name he had received the night before. He didn't even have to check the spelling; the name had been running through his head all day long.

His eyes widened slightly as the first website to come up on the list was a Shinra site. He already had a feeling that his father was a Shinra member, a lot of the kids in Midgar were products of SOLDIER's one night stands and his mom had hinted at it on the rare occasions she had spoken about his father. He clicked on the screen and read the information.

That site and all the rest of the sights he had spent the next two hours researching gave him the same frustratingly small piece of information on Basch: He was a commanding SOLDIER thirteen years ago until he left Shinra for unknown reasons, no further information has been found on him since. It was annoying but at least he knew Basch was real. The most important thing he found was an old headshot of the man. Cloud couldn't deny that they shared the same features. The similarities were so obvious yet hard to pick out but their skin and mouths were definitely the same and Cloud already knew he had his mother's eyes and hair. He could definitely be a mix of the two.

Basch von Ronsenburg was his father.

Cloud sighed and sunk down into his pillow. He closed his eyes and tried to clear his mind a bit. So Basch really was his father? He felt excited but tried to calm himself, rationalising that there was no proof that the man contacting him was really Basch at all. Then again, who else would they be?  
He pondered over it for a while, idly flicking the keys on his laptop as he contemplated his next move.

* * *

_Sephiroth was angry today. It was raining heavily which made the small assignment he had gone on a slow and tedious task that left him wishing death upon those imbeciles he refused to call colleagues. His patience had been tried all day long and to top it all off his journey home had taken an hour longer due to the storm enhanced traffic._

_Yes, Sephiroth had had a bad day, but the reason for his particularly foul mood that evening wasn't the weather; he was used to that. No, he was angry because when he did finally return home and switched on his laptop he was greeted with the sight of his boy on the screen. This would have pleased him if it were not for the digits on the corner of the screen telling him that Cloud had been on the connection for forty three minutes already._

_He was furious; the smashed fruit bowl on the ground was tribute to that._

_How dare the pathetic misgivings of his life prevent him from spending every possible minute he could with his angel? So many nights he had spent looking at a blank screen, hoping his angel would make any sort of appearance, only to miss it when it happens? He would not stand for it. Every day his longing for Cloud grew stronger and more desperate. He believed that he had wanted the boy at first but now...he needed him._

_It was strange, to need someone so much, especially when they had no idea, but Sephiroth didn't care. He knew Cloud. He knew Cloud more than the boy knew himself. Cloud wanted to be rescued, he wanted someone to come and take him away from that place, from that woman and that poverty. Cloud was never really happy, Sephiroth could see it in the way his eyes were always glossy with unshed tears and his lips were moulded to look natural in a frown. The only time the boy ever seemed to come alive was when he was with that other boy, something Sephiroth tried to ignore._

_He understood Cloud. He knew all about the dullness and unhappiness his boy was feeling because he had felt it too. The blond had saved him from that, given him a reason to live. He would return the favour._

_He had forced himself to calm down and to sit where he was now, on the couch watching his boy on the screen. He hadn't taken a shower or changed from his work attire, despite being dirty and drenched through from the rain. For the first time in his life he didn't care about being immaculate; he just wanted to see Cloud._

_The drops sliding down his chest and coat were a memory now. He had been watching his boy for over three hours. Studying him. Cloud went from reading to thinking to typing, looking perplexed all the time. He looked so young, in a white shirt two buttons open and no tie, revealing the shiny skin of his chest._

_It was during the third hour, when Cloud had spent most of his time looking away from his laptop in thought, that Sephiroth received an instant message email. He knew it was from Cloud and so with no small amount of excitement he opened it. Once he saw the message he let his lips form a brilliant smile, revealing his perfect teeth. It might have been frightening, if anyone were to see; reminiscent of a hunting jaguar._

**_ I think I believe you._**

_"Of course you do." He whispered patronisingly. Cloud was acting just as he predicted, fear turned to curiosity turned to vulnerability. Cloud was so...human. He was an easy target; young and innocent. He was falling right into Sephiroth's hands._

_Not bothering to wait as he did the night before, Sephiroth took the risk of replying to the boys email right away._

_It was hard for the General, never an emotional man, to come up with words that would come from an estranged father to his lost son. He made an effort to keep things slightly formal for now and when the boy trusted him more he could be freer with words._

* * *

Cloud felt those damn butterflies return to his stomach the minute he sent the email. He believed he was right in what he said but it was still scary. Inhaling sharply, he sat up straight and willed the person to reply. His eyes widened in surprise when after two minutes he did get an answer. He wasn't expecting that.

**_YSM: That is not what I expected to hear. I had my doubts about you contacting me again. I take it you did some research on my name?_**

He thought for a moment before replying.

**_: It's not really what I expected to say either but I think it's the truth. I did research your name but there's not very much information on you. Why is that?_**

It felt weird to be talking so casually with someone who could potentially be dangerous and he knew if his friends, especially Zack, found out they would go berserk. It didn't feel wrong though, and he had to follow his instinct for now.

The screen beeped again. Another message.

**_YSM: That is part of the reason I couldn't reveal myself in person to you. Shinra is a dark place Cloud. Everyone there, including me, has secrets. Maybe one day I can share them with you but for now it is best not to speak of such things._**

Cloud blinked a couple of times. That was...cryptic. It seemed to be a sensitive topic so he decided not to linger on it for now. He thought for a minute before replying.

**_: That seems fair. I'm sorry for prying. this is all just really fast._**

Several more minute, another reply.

**_YSM: It is I who should be apologising. This is not the way I would have you know me Cloud, and any questions you have, no matter how personal, you should ask. I am just happy to have this opportunity to speak with you at all._**

Cloud couldn't help the smile that spread across his face at those words. He felt stupid but the words were flattering. This man, his father, wanted him? His hands shook as he typed another message.

**_: I feel the same._**

**_YSM: It's good to hear that._**

Cloud bit his lip and smiled again. He made clicking sounds with his tongue as he leaned forward and typed.

**_: So, what happens now?_**

**_YSM: Let's just talk._**

* * *

They did talk, that night and almost every night after for the next three weeks. They talked about Cloud; Basch wanted to know all about him, they talked about Cloud's mother and Basch told Cloud all about the night they spent together, they talked about Shinra and Midgar and SOLDIER and anything else in their lives, they talked about everything and nothing, because all that mattered was that they were talking.

To Cloud, it was no longer dangerous or suspicious. He was so confident this was really his father that he could no longer see any possibility that this person was lying. His talks with his father became the thing he thought about when he woke up and looked forward to all day long. He wasn't stupid though, he knew he may be getting too involved too fast but...he didn't care. Why would he? This was his father; he could feel it.

_Silly boy._

He thought about all of this as he sat at the counter at Dilly Dallies, watching the clock tick by slowly. It was almost seven and he was finished at eight. He sighed and leaned his head on his hand; he was tired, he had stayed up late the night before emailing Basch and then he had had to get up early for school, which was followed by a four hour shift where he was now.

The door opening caused him to straighten up and he turned his head to see who entered. His eyes widened in surprise when caught sight of the person.

"Hey." He said, albeit a little awkwardly. Vossler smiled.

"Hey there blondie." The brunet made his way over to the counter and stood in front of him.

They hadn't really talked since before the dance so the situation was...awkward. "Haven't seen you in a while."

"Yeah, I've been kind of busy." Cloud explained, looking down at the counter. He looked up when Vossler shifted and picked out a chocolate bar from the rack beside him. He gave a small smile when the other smirked cheekily.

"I love these." Vossler stated and the blond nodded, watching the older boy open the wrapper and take a bite with the side of his mouth while leaning his arm on the counter. "Listen," he started, "I just wanted to let you know that I'm not mad or anything about the dance."

Cloud looked down again and sighed, "Yeah I'm really..."

Vossler held up his hand to stop the boy, "No, It wasn't your fault. I know you wouldn't have bailed for any other reason. So no guilt?" He looked at Cloud intensely and the blond eventually gave in and nodded.

"Okay." He mumbled and Vossler smiled.

"Good, so we're friends?" He asked.

"We were never not friends. I've just been doing some thinking lately, trying to figure out my priorities and stuff so I have been a little distant, from everyone." Cloud explained with a frown. "I'm sorry if it looked like I was avoiding you."

"That's fair. So there's no problems between us then. " Vossler stated.

"No." Cloud agreed.

"Alright. Good to have that sorted. Now, do you know where I can find the mako enhancers? Damn light bulb's gone out in my apartment again." Cloud nodded, pointing to the third isle.

* * *

_Everything was so much better when one was happy. Food tasted better, material felt softer, days passed faster and so on so forth._

_Sephiroth had never known life to be so blissful before. For the first time he was seeing past the misery and futility of the world and was embracing the good things in life. Namely one; Cloud Strife._

_He had spent the last three weeks conversing with the boy. Talking with him. It felt unexplainably incredible to be actually talking with Cloud, to be connected with him. It didn't matter that the boy thought he was someone else because that was just temporary; he would learn the truth eventually._

_For now he was just enjoying spending time with Cloud, learning about his thoughts and views directly from him. Cloud was intelligent and innocent and his words reflected that. Sephiroth had fallen even more desperately in love with the boy these past few weeks._

_To see him through a screen and talk to him electronically every night only made him crave the real thing more. His body throbbed with need every time he saw those eyes and lips and anything else exposed to him. He wanted to hear Clouds voice, not read his words. He was happy now but it was only a mere tease of what could be if he actually had the boy with him, in his arms._

_He had been thinking lately; he all but had had the boy twisted around his little finger now. He could easily come up with a plan to bring Cloud right to him._

_Yes, why wait? Why torture himself any longer? It had been nice getting to know Cloud but it was now time to **get** Cloud…_

_No one could stop him._

_Cloud was his._


	11. XI

**Disclaimer: Don't own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

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"Uhhhhh, for Shiva's sake, Cloud." Yuffie groaned as she dropped her head onto the table in front of her with a low bang. Cloud only sighed, rolling his eyes and taking another sip of his drink.

It was a boring Saturday afternoon so Cloud, Yuffie, Tifa, Zack and Reno had decided to meet at Migelo's Place for something to eat. Tifa had to babysit her adoptive brother that night, Zack and Reno had a match the next morning and Cloud was low on funds so they had all decided to just hang out for a while instead of going out that night.

"But he's like super, super-hot. Reeeeeeeeally cute. Why do you do these awful things to meeeeee?" The small bundle of annoyance that was Yuffie continued. Cloud narrowed his eyes while looking at her in exasperation.

"You? What did I do to you?" He demanded, looking to the others for support. Reno and Zack just shrugged and Tifa laughed. Yuffie sat up quickly and poked the blond.

"You," she started, pointing her finger menacingly at him, "have to go out with him, y'know give him some of that pretty boy bum love. Then he would have to hang out with us and that would mean he would probably bring some of his super-hot and super senior friends along with him which would lead to us partying with a bunch of hot seniors who would see how seriously cool and talented I am and that would eventually lead to me having a hot senior boyfriend and truly being the coolest girl in the school!" She stated, holding out her arms as if what she had said was the most obvious thing in the world. Everyone at the table just stared at her, occasionally blinking.

"Oh…kay," Cloud started slowly, "I'm sorry for not going out with Vossler and giving you an opportunity to date a senior." There was a tinge of sarcasm in his voice but he knew Yuffie would ignore it.

"Hm, well you should be. Selfish blondie head." The small girl growled, but you could hear the lightness in her voice. Cloud nudged her and she nudged him back, trying to contain a laugh.

"You're in a good mood these days, Blondie. You sure you aint getting any anywhere?" Reno spoke up, throwing the blond a suggestive look. Cloud rubbed his forehead and looked down at the table.

"You know, I never ask about your love, or in Reno's case sex, lives so why don't you all return the favour?" He said, giving Yuffie and Reno a pointed look. Reno snorted.

"As if tha's gonna happen." He smirked at Yuffie who nodded her head.

"Ohhhh…kay… As much as I love talking about Cloud and, what did you call it Yuffie? Pretty boy bum love. Let's just change the subject he kills us all with that straw in his hand, nah?" Zack interrupted, giving Cloud a bright smile.

The blond returned the gesture with a smile of his own. He really did want the conversation to end, mostly because his friends were right; he was happy. For over a month now everything had been going well, his mom was on new medication for the last three weeks and since then her energy and immune levels had been high. The thing that was really the cause of his new found happiness wasn't his home or school life though. It was his new found relationship with his father.

They still spoke on-line every night and for around two weeks now the conversation had been getting much deeper and emotional, on both sides. It was strange to be so close to someone you've never even met but Cloud didn't care, he felt like he could tell Basch anything and that the other felt the same. Basch was intelligent and seemed like an admirable person, he had never asked anything of Cloud only to speak with him. Cloud felt flattered that this man, his father, was pleased by such a simple thing from him. He was contented with how things were progressing for now but couldn't help feeling excited about what the future might hold for them. They might get to really meet each other one day. He knew if that happened he would have to be careful, but just the possibility of it was thrilling.

It felt like there was only one thing missing from his life at the moment...

"Zack?"

Tifa's voice brought Cloud out of his musing. He looked over and ignored the happiness he felt when he saw Tifa gathering her things, indicating she was leaving soon. "I have to get going; Denzel's training is finished at six." The brunette beauty informed, giving them all a small smile.

"Awe, little brothers are so annoying." Zack grumbled, standing up and letting his girlfriend out of the booth. "Well I'll walk you out. Gotta make sure no weirdoes are snooping around the parking lot, waiting to jump pretty girlies." He placed his arm around her shoulders and they headed for the exit. Cloud let his gaze linger on the two before turning back to Reno and Yuffie.

"Don't think those two're gonna last." Reno commented, chewing on his straw. Cloud and Yuffie gave him puzzled looks and he sighed. "Aint been gett'n on too well. I hear…"

"What? I thought they were getting on great?" Cloud asked, looking out the window at the two.

"Yeah well all I know is Tifa's been starting on Zack about flirting with other...people and she's been trying to get him to stop goin out with his buddies and shit. Aint no way Zacks gonna deal with that crap for too long! Even said himself he's sick of havin to answer to someone bout every'tin he does." Reno explained, raising his brows in a severe manner. Cloud pressed his lips together.

"Maybe it's just a phase." He mumbled. It was hard for him to ignore the fact that every part of him hoped he was wrong.

"I never thought they suited together anyway. There just...boring together. Like, all gooey and stuff but with no paaaaassion. Y'know?" Yuffie spoke up and placed the straw in her mouth, slurping her soda loudly.

"He's coming back." Cloud whispered upon seeing Zack make his way back towards the door. The three went back to sipping there drinks inconspicuously.

"Hey, what did I miss then?" Zack asked, sitting back down.

"Not much." Cloud answered. "Bitching about you mostly." He made a face at the raven haired boy and Zack clicked his tongue and threw a cold fry at him.

"Uh, that old perve Migelo is kind of looking at us. He's so gross. But I guess we have been here for like, four hours now." Yuffie whispered, giggling. Zack looked over to see that she was right and winced.

"Yeah, he is staring. Creepy guy, makes me feel all goose-bumpy when he does that. We should probably leave soon." He confirmed.

They all stayed there for ten more minutes before paying and leaving. Reno was giving Yuffie a lift to her house-much to his annoyance- so it was just Zack and Cloud left in outside the diner.

Cloud licked his lips, looking away for a minute. He turned back to Zack and smiled lightly.

"Um... Zack, do you want to come over to my house? I have something to show you." He said. Zack gave him a questioning look and Cloud just shook his head.

"I'll show you at home." He explained and Zack gave him another confused look.

"Hmm, I hope you're not planning on doing anything weird to me. Drugging me and trying me up so you can get at my ass." Cloud huffed in annoyance, clenching his fists at his sides. Zack caught the movement and raised his arms in the air. "Okay, okay. Don't hit me or anything coz I don't want to bruise. Let's just go. Bully."

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"Come into my room." Cloud ushered.

"Well, you didn't buy me a drink but..." Zack joked as he made his way to the boy's bedroom. Cloud laughed and shut the door once they were both inside.

"Where's Sky?" Zack asked, taking a seat on the bed.

"Oh, she and Shera went to town today. Mom said she was sick of staying in and I think they were going to buy flowers from that strange girl or something." The blond replied idly. Zack smiled.

"That's great." He said softly, giving his friend an honest smile. It wasn't often Sky was well enough to venture outside. Cloud nodded before standing in front of the boy and fidgeting. The older teen leaned back on the bed and looked up at him.

"Heh, you're making me nervous chocobo." He said. "I was only kidding about the drug rape thing but now I kinda feel like I should run for the door."

"Um," Cloud started, ignoring him. "I have been lying to you." He looked down; suddenly feeling like there was a bag of sand in his stomach.

"What do you mean?" Zack asked, racking his brain for what the blond might be referring to. Cloud took a deep breath.

"Uh, I told you that I never made contact with the person who sent the computer and stuff but that was...kind of a lie." The blond opened his mouth to say more but decided to see how his friend was digesting what he said so far. He looked at Zack and noticed that he was oddly calm but his jawbone was tense. Bad omen.

"Kind of?" Zack asked softly once he saw that the boy wasn't going to continue.

"Um, no. A lot." Cloud admitted and ignored the way Zack snorted. "I've actually been talking to him for over a month now."

If only anger had known it had a rival in Zack Fair at that moment… Cloud had had some reserves about telling Zack, but now he was completely regretting the idea. Zack didn't shout or insult or even stand up. He just placed his hands up to his face and hissed whether the blond was "fucking kidding him" or not.

Cloud felt his insides bubble nervously and walked over to the other, kneeling down in front of him.

"Zack," he said, "don't be mad. It's a good thing, I swear." He grabbed the others tanned hands and pulled them away from his face so he could make contact with the violet orbs. They were smouldering and threatened a gulp from Clouds throat.

"Oh, a good thing? Hmm, so you're telling me that you making contact with a potential psycho is a good thing? I really must be dumb because I can't see that logic at all." The boy replied incredulously. Cloud sat back on his heels.

"Don't say it like that Zack." He said softly. "You have to listen to me. He's not a psycho, he really is my father." At this Zack narrowed his eyes.

"I have proof," Cloud bit out, feeling his own temper flare. Zack was looking at him like he was an idiot.

"Proof?" The other questioned and Cloud nodded. "Show me." He knew he was being flippant and maybe that was not the best way to deal with this situation but he was so...mad. Why would Cloud put himself in danger like this? Why didn't he tell him?

"Okay, he uh, gave me a name. And I looked it up and it was real, he was a SOLDIER, the dates all match. He was in Midgar the year I was born. I have a picture too." Cloud said, picking up his laptop and turning it on. Zack looked down.

"A name? Is that the only proof you have?" He questioned, anger turning into concern. The blond was breathing heavily and his eyes were wide with determination. He didn't look fully sane.

"Well the name and the dates and the picture. I've been taking to this man for a while now and I can just tell that he's telling the truth." He muttered quickly. Once he found what he was looking for he turned the laptop and shoved it in Zack's face.

Zack's purple eyes scanned the picture in front of him and found himself awe struck. This man was so similar to Cloud, their features were so alike. He wasn't expecting to be convinced about the man but seeing this photo...He looked at Cloud and noticed that the blonde's eyes were wavering, like he was desperate to find that someone else saw the resemblance. Zack sighed and placed his hand on top of the laptop to lower it.

"Okay yeah, he looks like you Cloud." He admitted. "How have you been talking to him, phone?"

"No, online." Cloud replied, turning the computer to face him and scanning his eyes over the picture, smiling softly. Zack frowned.

"You've never heard his voice?" He asked. Cloud shook his head and he sighed, bringing up one hand to rub at his face. "Gaia Cloudy! How do you know there even the same person? It's just a picture."

"I just know Zack," Cloud snapped. "We've been taking for so long now I feel like I know him...It's just...He is." He whispered the last part softly.

Zack took in the blonde's appearance; eyes wide and desperate, he was practically shaking. He felt a small twinge of dread in his stomach.

"Cloud," he whispered, raising a hand to place on the boys head, "I'm not trying to argue with you buddy, but you have to see the danger in this right?" Cloud ducked his head.

"I know that Zack, I'm not an idiot. This just feels right. You know?" Zack wasn't convinced but he could see that there was no point in fighting with the boy right now. The truth was that Cloud was worrying him. The usually quiet and rational boy was acting just the opposite of that.

"Okay then chocobo-head, why don't you show me a little more about this guy." He forced a smile which was eagerly returned by his friend. "Try to convince me you're not talking to some sort of loony bin."

"Okay." Cloud agreed and sat up beside Zack on the bed on order to show him more. He was happy that Zack believed him; it made his belief in the truth stronger to know that someone else saw the truth too.

A snake of worry continued to slither in Zack's stomach but he tried to hide it behind false smiles and nods of agreement.

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_Unfortunately for the boys, there had been another member involved in their conversation; emerald eyes following their every move and word. _

_The owner of those eyes was currently standing on the second floor of the Shinra building, peering down at the crowd below, a plan formulating in his mind. It was only an hour since he heard what Cloud had done but he knew he had to act quickly._

_Sephiroth hadn't been angry when he saw what Cloud did; in fact he was quite pleased that he had gotten a front seat to the whole thing. He had been watching Cloud closely over the last month, both on screen and in person, to see whether he was using any outside sources to find out more about his false persona or to see whether he had told anyone. _

_He knew that Cloud telling Zack was the end of his game, the raven-haired pest would not be as easy to fool as his boy, he would go snooping around for more proof and that could cause trouble for him. Especially considering who his uncle was._

_No, the game had to end now, and he knew exactly how to end it._

_His mouth spread into an empty smile as he made his way down the stairs and approached skinny figure dressed in an ill fitted white shirt and black pants._

_"Mr Fitzgerald." He stated and the man in question turned._

_"S-Sephiroth," he smirked when he saw the grey eyes light up in obvious admiration and awe. There was something else there too._

_Perfect._

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Zack sighed as he let himself into his apartment. He dropped his keys on the table beside him before walking down the hall and into the living area.

"Angeal?" He called, "you home?" After his conversation with Cloud he couldn't wait until the morning to get some answers.

"Angeal?" He tried again, becoming frustrated with the lack of reply. He opened his mouth to shout once more when a voice to his left startled him.

"Zackary! What on the planet are you doing shouting like that?" His uncle questioned in an angry tone. Zack turned to take in his uncles appearance; T-shirt, plain pants and ruffled hair.

"Eh, you sleeping?" He questioned, fully aware of the answer. Angeal offered him a withering look.

"Was there something you needed?" He asked his nephew in a flat voice. Zack frowned and looked away for a minute.

"Yeah," he said, reaching an arm to scratch at the back of his head. "This is kinda random but d'you remembers anyone who used to work in Shinra, called Basch Von Ronsenburg?" Angeal looked slightly startled at this. Clearly taken by surprise.

"Why?" The tall man asked, folding his arms. It wasn't in his nature to lose his footing so his composure was intact. Zack felt a little hope; it wasn't a completely negative answer.

"Just," he exhaled, "I can't really say that now but I need to know if you knew him." Angeal narrowed his eyes before sighing and walking past Zack, into the kitchen. Zack turned to follow him, like a trailing puppy.

"I knew Basch." Angeal said softly while filling up a glass of water. Zack perked up and waited for the other to say more. "He was a head SOLDIER around fifteen years ago. Why would you be asking about him Zackary?" Angeal turned and gave him a piercing stare; the same one which had been used on him since he was seven. Zack stopped for a minute. He had promised Cloud he wouldn't tell anyone about the emails, but this may be a case of protecting the boy from himself.

"I need to know where Basch is now. Do you have any clue at all?" He decided to keep the secret for as long as he could. Angeal seemed to mull over something for a minute and Zack thought he looked like he was deciding whether or not to tell the truth.

"I don't." The tall man finally said, "He left Shinra around fourteen years ago and I never heard from him again." Zack nodded. That is what Cloud had told him, and that meant that the person speaking with Cloud could indeed be Basch. He felt his stomach lighten a bit.

"Oh, okay then… good." Zack gave his uncle a small smile before walking over to the fridge. He was just about to open it when a large hand slammed it back shut.

"Zackary. Is there a reason as to why you're inquiring about a man I am certain has nothing to do with you?" Angeal smirked in an eerie way that made Zack laugh nervously.

"Eh…S-school project." He stuttered.

"No." Angeal stated firmly, turning serious again.

"Yeah it is I..." Zack started to argue but one more glare from Angeal shut him up. It was a ridiculous excuse anyway, school project? What was he thinking?

"Okay, fine. You're like a drill sergeant or something you know. I have rights to my privacy but you just ignooooore that." Zack sighed; he pushed his hair back from his face and looked back up at his uncle. "This Basch person is Clouds father." And again Angeal was blindsided.

"What makes you say that?" He asked in genuine curiosity. Zack licked his lips, figuring he may as well break the rest of his promise now.

"Well, that's the thing. Um, Cloud only told me tonight which I wasn't very pleased about by the way. He found it all out a while ago. I've seen the picture and they do look alike." Angeal nodded his head and took another drink. He hadn't thought about Basch for a long time, his face was foggy in his mind so examining the similarities between the two would be futile without a picture. He looked back at his nephew to see two purple eyes staring at him, waiting for anything he had to say.

"That is interesting. I'm sure Cloud is overwhelmed by the news. Tell me, how did he come about this information?" He asked. He was sure all information concerning Basch and the incident had been hidden by Shinra? The fact that Zack was enquiring about the man's whereabouts today was enough to insure that they didn't know the full story. Maybe that was for the better...

"Well that's the even bigger thing," Zack laughed nervously, "Basch told him himself." He looked up at Angeal, waiting for another puzzled look. His stomach did a triple flip when he saw the expression of utter disbelief cross his uncle's face.

"What does that mean?" Angeal asked in a deep and inpatient voice.

"Uh, well, Basch made contact with Cloud a while back. They've been talking for over a month now, online, and I thought it was dangerous but now I'm not sure. The pieces are all fitting together."

"It's not possible." Angeal cut in quickly. Zack stopped talking, feeling his throat choke in nervousness.

"Why not?" He asked; almost afraid of the answer. Angeal rubbed the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes again. Telling Zack the truth would violate Shinra's rules. However if what Zack was saying was true then someone was fooling Cloud and Angeal could only guess what their intentions would be…

"Ang-"

"Basch Ronsenburg is most certainly, and assuredly dead." Angeal bit out. Zack blinked, not properly understanding the words at first.

"Gaia. Are you sure Angeal?" Zack asked after a short silence. He brought his eyes up to meet the taller mans. Uncertain, suspicious.

"Oh, I am positive. I was highly involved in the incident concerning his execution and I will not tell you anymore only that without a doubt, Basch Von Ronsenburg died twelve years ago." He stopped talking when he saw Zack turn quickly away and head out of the kitchen.

"Zack." He called out; grabbing the boy's shoulder and turning him back around. Zack's face was pinched with tension as he bared his teeth.

"I knew it. I fucking knew it. It was too creepy to be true. I told Cloud to be careful but he wouldn't listen. He's so fucking stubborn y'know. He didn't even tell me until tonight." Zack hissed as he slapped his uncle's hand away. "I have to go over and tell him. He could be talking to that creep, whoever it is, right now."

"It's too late to go over there now. Wait until the morning; nothing's going to happen tonight. You can go and explain everything tomorrow and then I'll help you figure out what to do. There's no point in telling him tonight. Anyway, I'll not allow you to drive like this." Angeal leaned forward to catch Zack's wandering gaze, conveying his seriousness through his eyes. Zack shook his head.

"What? No I can't, I have-"

"No, there's no point. All you can do tonight is worry. We'll figure this out tomorrow." He stated firmly. Zack looked like he was going to argue but then his eyes softened.

"Uh, I suppose you're right. There's nothing we can do now. I could call him but I don't think it would be right to tell him something like that over the phone. Kid's pretty excited about this an it's gonna kill him. First thing tomorrow." He shook Angeal's hands off him and closed his eyes. "Poor Cloudy. Really gets the bad stuff thrown at him." He sighed out, rubbing his hands against his sides. Angeal nodded.

"One of the main duties of a friend is to be a light in dark times. Do you understand?" Zack thought the words over. A light in dark times? He felt he would lag under such a burden.

"Okay…" He blew out a breath of air. "I get ya. I'm gonna go to bed now. Will you be here in the morning?" He asked.

"I should be here until ten." Angeal said. Zack gave another nod and headed to his room solemnly.

"He sure gets the bad stuff thrown at him."

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Zack took a sleeping potion to make himself sleep that night, knowing he wouldn't have caught a wink otherwise. The result of forced sleep is that it takes a while for one to get rid of the grogginess once awake.

Zack didn't have time for that. He had woken up and the moment his brain turned on it informed him of what happened the night before.

Sitting up quickly, he jumped out of bed and with blurry eyes proceeded to put on anything he could find that would pass as clothing. He didn't see the corner of the bed or the wooden box by the wall which resulted in him having to ignore two injuries as he headed out the door and into the living area.

He gulped down a glass of water and then headed for the apartments exit. He bent down to retrieve his keys on the table by the door and his eyes caught sight of a white piece of paper beside his keys. Arching a brow, he picked up the note and read it.

It was Angeal informing him that he had had to leave for an emergency in work. He didn't think much of it as this was a regular occurrence; he had forgotten Angeal was supposed to be home anyway.

He crumpled up the note and picked up his keys before heading outsider.

It took him fifteen minutes to get to Cloud's apartment building on his bike and when he did he was surprised when he saw a very familiar black car in the parking lot. Why would Angeal be here without telling him?

Feeling anger and nervousness course through him, he got off his bike and hurriedly made his way up to Clouds home. He knocked on the door and stepped back when instead of Cloud or Sky, Angeal answered the door.

"What are you doing here?" He asked with no small amount of accusation in his voice. His uncle looked behind him before stepping outside and closing the door.

"A Shinra employee was found dead in his home at five this morning." The tall man started before his nephew could say anything. Zack looked up at Angeal, confusion and impatience written on his face.

"He was discovered by his neighbour when she saw that his door was left unlocked. Suicide. They found him hanging above his couch. I was called in immediately, as this man was reasonably high up in the company." Zack shook his head.

"Okay, uh, why are you telling me this and why are you here?" He demanded, voice raising an octave.

"Silence." Angeal hissed. He glared at the other for a minute before calming down, "The man's apartment was littered with a number of artefacts which is the reason why I'm here. Pictures, letters and items, all addressed to and concerning one person," Zack didn't think he wanted to hear the rest, "Cloud Strife." The taller man watched as his nephews face broke into a canvas of shock, disgust and anger.

"Oh, Gaia." Zack stated numbly. "He was the one?" He looked up at Angeal who crossed his arms and nodded firmly.

"He lived a couple of streets away from here, no spouse or close friends. He must have seen the boy and developed an obsession with him some time ago. He was high up in the Shinra ladder which meant he had special access concerning Basch and also to Shinra equipment. We found all the emails addressed to Cloud as well as pictures of him and letters about him." The SOLDIER took a breath. "I'm sorry Zack. He is quite upset in there. You should go to him."

"Okay." Zack felt like puking. This was so sick. Unreal, that was the only word. Things like this didn't happen in real life. First Seifer, now this? It just wasn't normal.

Angeal gave him a nod and turned to leave. "Angeal?" He shouted before the other could walk away.

"Yes?"

"What was his name?" Angeal clicked his tongue.

"Clarence FitzGerald."


	12. XII

**Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy or any other Square Enix characters.**

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"Cloud."

"No."

"It's going to b-"

"No."

Zack felt at a loss for words as he took in the form curled up on the bed. Cloud was lying with his back to him, knees pressed to his chest. He took a breath to say something but then decided to just step fully into the room and close the door behind him. He stood there awkwardly for a minute.

"I don't really know what to say," he started, licking his dry lips that weren't actually that dry, "I'm sorry buddy."

"Are you mad?" His voice was so soft and raw that Zack had to look towards the wall in order to distract himself. He squeezed his mouth shut and exhaled through his nostrils.

"Not at you."

"_I'm_ mad at me." The boy said lowly, "How on Gaia did I let him trick me like that? Fuck…"

Zack walked forward and sat down beside the boy on the bed. "Don't think about that now."

"I can't _stop_ thinking about it."

"He was a fucking freak. A smart fucking freak. He just…knew how to get to you. Anyone could have fallen for it." He trailed off, rubbing Cloud's arm. The blond sighed loudly and turned around to face his friend. Zack frowned as he took in the too pale face and chapped lips.

"Can you imagine it?" Cloud whispered, eyes widening dazedly. It seemed to take him a lot of effort to get on to his knees. "I can't. It's hard to think that he was… looking at me all of that time." The sadness in his blue eyes morphed into anger as Cloud grit his teeth. "A camera on the top of the thing. It's crazy…"

Zack said nothing, just nodded and gave the boy a sympathetic smile. "It's not normal." A bitter laugh escaped Clouds throat as he shook his head. "I mean…when does this stuff really happen? Its… ."

"Yeah well he's dead now so it doesn't really matter what he saw, nothing else is gonna happen, you can move on." Cloud swallowed and shook his head, his lips pressed firmly together.

"No," he straightened up and placed his hands on the older boy's wrists, "It's not over. I'll have to do an interview with the police this week and then it's all going to be on the news probably. Everyone's going to know. They're going to know how stupid I am. That's what they're going to say." His eyes widened and he swallowed the saliva filling his mouth. "I know what it's gonna look like." His face screwed up like he had bitten a lemon.

Zack bit the inside of his cheek and shrugged. What could he say? He felt the same… Cloud was right, this was such a fucked up mess, and it was going to get a lot worse before it got better. He forced a smile on his face anyway.

"It will be a rough few weeks, but it'll blow over and then everything will be back to normal. I know it doesn't feel like that now, but it will. There's gonna be like a hundred more crimes in the city by the months end, yours will look pretty uninteresting compare to some of them." He brought his forehead forward to touch Cloud's; feeling the heat radiating from the boy.

"That's not all though. I don't even really care about that now, not really." Cloud said, sitting back and wiping at his face for the hundredth time that morning. Zack gave him a coaxing look and he closed his eyes. "He's gone."

"Huh, Clarence?" Zack asked in confusion, squinting his eyes. Cloud shook his head.

"…Basch." He mumbled lowly, like he didn't really want to say it. The boy let out another bitter chuckle. "My _dad_."

"Uh… he wasn-"

"I know." The blond interrupted his friend briskly, giving him a look. Zack pressed his lips together and Cloud sighed. "I know," he repeated, softer this time. "It felt real though. You know? I ...I know it was fake but it felt like… kind of exciting or something. Now it feels like I actually lost someone. It's stupid really… "

Zack sighed and placed a hand on his shoulders.

"I get it."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Why does it feel like the start of something bad?" Cloud asked solemnly after a while, laying his head back on the pillow and tapping his fingers against his chest.

"Na, you're just being negative as usual. Moody boy." Zack answered, copying the boys' actions and joining him on the pillow. "It will get better."

It was strange, the way he didn't believe his own words.

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You would never guess just how effective those lights are. Lines and lines of illuminating bulbs just blur into one fog of nothingness as you listen to the sounds around you. Shoes scraping off the ground, leather squeaking, pages turning, air filtering through hair.

He just kept looking at the lights.

"When did he first contact you?" A voice now, cold and indifferent, but with a tinge of sincerity. Not for him, for mankind in general.

"Four months ago." Was that his voice?

"How?" One word questions, was that good or bad?

"He sent me stuff," he stopped to clear his throat, "a box of stuff. Um, the laptop and stuff. And a letter." The light was really bright now, would he be able to see when it went away.

"What happened after that?" I spiralled into hell.

"I didn't do anything at first but then I received a letter with an email address." He was startled when his voice got caught in his throat.

"Take a drink Cloud." He did as he was told, not taking his eyes away from the light as his fingers sought out the plastic cup, feeling its sides cave as he applied pressure and picked it up.

"Did you contact him with this email address?" Obviously.

"Yes." Weren't one word sentences the order of the day? He heard the man take an impatient breath. It almost tempted him to take his eyes away from the lights. He didn't.

"I contacted him. Then he contacted me. Then we began talking." Seems so simple when it's said like that.

"Did you suspect this person was lying to you?" The light flickered, or was that just his mind?

"I didn't care." Don't care, don't care.

"You're a smart boy Cloud. Surely you know about online predators?" Ah, there it was; the lecture. Why did you do it Cloud? Did you not see the danger Cloud? Poor little boy. Stupid little child. He closed his eyes sharply when the green tinged light seemed to grow brighter.

"I know." He said, placing his hands around his stomach to contain the sudden sickness that had risen in it. "I'm sorry." I'm sorry.

"Okay." The deep voice was accompanied by a loud exhale. He opened his eyes, now framed with water, and looked back towards the light. He had no desire to see anything else right now.

The questions continued, but he paid no attention anymore.

The light grew brighter, occasionally blurring, as the questions went on, from the man or in his head? He honestly didn't know.

When?

How?

Who?

What?

Why?

**Why?**

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"So you're going to Modeoheim?" A voice behind him brought Sephiroth out of his musing. He turned away from the view in front of him to address the speaker. His long-time friend; Angeal Hawley.

"Yes." He said, scanning the other for a reaction. Angeal nodded, looking out past Sephiroth. The two were standing on one of the large pipes belonging to the Midgar damn; one could see the entire span of the city from there. With the setting sun casting a golden-orange glow over the place, you would never guess how dark it truly was.

"I never imagined you'd do it." The raven haired man chuckled, walking up to his friend. Sephiroth let a smirk form on his face.

"You know I'm not one to waste conversation if it is meaningless." He said, closing his eyes only to open them when the dark-haired man spoke again.

"You've been here since you were a child. You're so stuck in your routines. I never imagined you would break them." The words were spoken calmly, no attempt to make them anything else.

"You make me sound pathetic." Sephiroth said dryly, his eyes sliding to the other man as he arched a brow. Angeal shook his head.

"No," he said, "just like you." The General cricked his neck, not denying the statement.

"Well, perhaps it's time for a change."

"Yes. It might be good for you. This city is becoming more decrepit by the day." Something dark wormed its way into the man's voice as his eyes narrowed, the city's tallest buildings reflecting in them

"I'm impatient to leave." Sephiroth admitted. "I tire of the pace."

"Well, Modeoheim is about as far from a city as you could get." Angeal let out a breath of laughter. Sephiroth shrugged.

"That's why I chose it."

"When are you leaving?" The raven-haired man asked, turning to face him fully.

"Two weeks." He answered, clenching his fists at his sides. Two weeks…

"And they are not angry at you for leaving?" Angeal was referring to the authorities of Shinra, the president and his minions.

"I'm sure they are. However, the war is over and I am under no obligation to them any longer. I have agreed to lend a hand at the Modeoheim branch and they wouldn't dare push me any further, lest they alienate me altogether." He crossed his arms in front of him and looked down at the ground.

"Well, I suppose I will have to handle things alone from now on." A pang of guilt shot through Sephiroth's chest.

"No news from Genesis then." He questioned. Angeal stayed silent and shook his head.

"I'm sure he will return in his own time." Sephiroth mumbled, though he wasn't sure if he really believed his own words.

"Perhaps… I have some business to attend to now. I'm sure I will see you before you leave?" With a nod from Sephiroth, the SOLDIER made his way over the pipe and onto the roof of the large reservoir it was attached to.

Sephiroth listened to the sound of the man's fading footsteps and then a metal door screeching shut.

He closed his eyes.

Time for a change?

His new life was starting now. He had taken all the first steps.

He had sold his apartment.

He had bought a house; a mansion in fact, situated deep within the Modeoheim Mountains. The kind of place one would go for undisturbed solitude.

He had been transferred to the much smaller Modeoheim Shinra branch, a position which would allow him plenty of free time to do as he pleased. He wasn't Shinar's puppet any longer. The war was over now; there was no need for the Great General Sephiroth anymore.

He would leave in two weeks, but his life wouldn't begin then. No, he had some work to do first.

There was a large basement in his new home. It was a damp, cold space which had previously been used for the storage of crockery and wine. However, with a few months of renovation, it would suit his needs perfectly.

It was the reason he had chosen that house over all others.

He smiled to himself, the anticipation of what was to come coursing through his veins. Feeling restless; he crouched down. He scraped the dust beneath his fingers and without hesitation, lunged from the pipe. Jumping into the air like a creature rising from the lifestream.

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"You ready."

Cloud sighed, looking up at the other as he shifted his bag on his back.

"No."

"It's going to be-"

"Awkward."

Zack sighed, looking at the smaller boy a bit helplessly. Two weeks had passed since what they were calling the 'Clarence incident' and now Cloud was finally forced to face school again. It appeared that fourteen days was enough time to get over one of the most devastating and creepy experiences of your life.

"Does everyone…know?"

"N-" Cloud gave him a flat look.

"Well, Yeah. Except that Wutian boy who doesn't speak English…unless someone translated it for him"

"Oh good. No explaining needed then." Cloud muttered crankily.

"Not sure I'm liking sarcastic Cloudy." Zack stuck out his tongue. Cloud shrugged and jerked his head towards the door.

"It's nearly nine." He said, utterly resigned to his faith.

"If you don't want to go in you don't have to. We could ditch…" Zack's eyes widened and he held out his hands. "Ah, we could go get a bunch of junk food and head to the park." Cloud laughed and closed his eyes.

"Tempting. But all that's going to do is delay all this one day. Plus, you don't need any more junk food." The older boy narrowed his eyes.

"What are you trying to-"

"Yo."

The two boys turned to see Reno and Axel heading up the school steps. Zack looked to Cloud for a minute, who was looking down towards the ground. Besides Yuffie, Zack was the only one of his friends Cloud had seen since everything had happened.

"Hi." He said, waiting for the two to get to the top.

"Hey." Reno said, and Axel soon after. Zack felt like sighing when he saw the two turn to the smaller boy awkwardly.

"Cloudy…" Reno began, trying and failing to hide his nervousness behind a usual careless demeanour.

"Hey." Cloud said, not quite meeting his eyes. "How are you?"

"Yeah. Good. Good…" Reno nodded his head as Axel mirrored his reply. The four stayed quiet for a few minutes and not able to take it, Zack cleared his throat loudly.

"So…" He began, searching his currently fuzz-ball mind for something to say.

"I was stalked." If he had anything in his mouth he would have spat it out, and Zack turned to look at the boy incuriously. Cloud shrugged. "Well, we could have been here all day."

He heard a hoarse bark of laughter behind him.

"Yeah," Reno drawled, stepping closer to the other. "Hate that tip-toeing shit."

"You probably know everything already." Cloud said, fingering the strap of his bag.

"Yeah... Heard the freak offed himself. Good endin;"

"Reno." Axel hissed but Cloud just nodded.

"We're sorry about the whole thing Cloud… It's insane…" Axel shook his head in bewilderment.

"Thanks."

"You know though." Reno began, a mischievous smirk spreading across his face. "There is sumtin good bout all this…"

"Reno…" Zack began warily.

"What?" Cloud was genuinely curious, obviously not getting the tense vibe the other two boys were giving off.

"At least now ya know what ya are."

"What's that?" Cloud asked again. He looked at Zack who just shook his head.

"One bonafide piece of ass… seriously." The redhead held out his arms and looked at all three heads for encouragement. "It's fucking flattering. Come on… Someone offs themselves just fer ya-"

"I have to go to class." Cloud mumbled flatly.

"Yeah." Zack agreed.

"I'm coming with you two." Alex slapped Reno on the shoulder, hard, and then adjusted his bag as he followed the other two to the door.

"I'm not being a dick…It's good for self-esteem. That's IMPORTANT for teenagers."

The redhead spat and pulled the cigarette from behind his left ear, looking around to make sure no teachers were watching. Not that he really cared either way.

"Least ya know ya meant sometin ta someone," he mumbled into the butt.

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**Six months later**

Cloud closed the book, happy to be finally finished the essay he had been working on for the past three hours. His hand felt cramped so he stretched out his fingers as he made his way over to his bed.

He sat down and looked around, not realising how dark it had gotten.

Six months had passed since the nightmare involving his stalker had accoured. Everyone had told Cloud that after a while things would get better; that the whole event would just flow to the back of his mind. He had tried to believe them at first, when the sickness was so strong and it felt like the only way to abate it.

He wasn't so sure now. So much time had passed and it still felt like a shadow was following him around. He felt so many things at once and he couldn't stop them from colliding into one big disaster; his Dad was gone, someone was so obsessed with him they killed themselves, Seifer died because of him, and his mom would die soon...

It was too much.

He hyperventilated for a few minutes, trying to think of something positive. He found it was easier to get rid of the sickness now than it had been at first, maybe because he had practice doing it every night, but he was so tired of having to do it.

The police had recommended a psychiatrist after the event with Clarence, but he had adamantly refused, horrified at the thought. Sky had been furious with him but he didn't care; he wasn't going to sit in a room and spill his secrets to a complete stranger. He had never believed in that kind of 'medicine'.

It probably wasn't the best way to deal with it but Cloud had taken solitude as his aid. He wouldn't talk to anyone about the situation anymore, not even his Mom or Zack. He had quit his job at Dilly Dallies, reasoning that he wouldn't be doing anything to need the money for a long time.

The blond had stayed out of school for the first two weeks and only Zack's coaxing got him to go back then. The first few days were awful, with every student, even his friends, treating him like an odd vase which would break any minute. He hated their looks of sympathy and whispers and still tried to stay out of crowded areas as much as possible.

His only source of comfort in the place had been Zack, and he was more thankful than ever that he was in his life.

Eventually his life had become the routine it was in now. Go to school, go home, do homework, go to bed. Go to school; go home...and so on. He didn't even talk to his mom as much anymore, feeling like he had somehow betrayed her.

He only really used full sentences when Zack came to visit him, mostly because the raven haired boy would call him names and poke him if he didn't.

Cloud Strife had changed.

He sat up straight and blew some hair out of his face; it was getting long, he should probably get it cut this weekend. Pushing it out of his eyes, he got up from the bed and headed out of his room and into the living area. He was surprised to see his mom sitting on the couch, watching TV.

"Hey mom." Sky turned around and smiled brightly at him.

"Hey sweetie! I thought you were gone to bed." She turned herself fully on the sofa to look at him. He raised a brow and looked at the clock.

"It's only seven thirty..." He stated flatly. Sky looked at the clock and shrugged.

"I never see you after six anymore." She smiled at him sadly. Cloud frowned, his chest becoming heavy with guilt.

"I guess." He agreed. The two were silent for a minute before Cloud looked up and nodded towards the television.

"What are you watching?" He questioned; voice too enthusiastic to be natural.

"Who wants to be a Gillionaire." She laughed, "These people know less than a five year old. Come on over and watch it with me for a while." She waved her hand to the spot next to her. Her son nodded, walking over and taking a seat beside her.

They watched for a little while, neither saying anything, until Sky sighed.

"I remember he was handsome." She said softly, eyes closed. Cloud looked at her with a confused expression.

"What?" He asked.

"You remind me of him sometimes." She continued, ignoring his question. "I loved him you know. Even if it was only one night. It broke my heart that I never got to see him again. I never even found out his name." Cloud looked away, worrying his bottom lip. Sky opened her eyes and looked at her son.

"Cloud." She said, reaching out a hand to place on his shoulder. "He didn't know about you. I think if he did he would be here now. He had a good soul." When Cloud shook his head she ran her hand through his hair. "Listen. I never saw him again, I never even looked. He couldn't know about you."

"His name was Basch." Cloud said softly, not taking his eyes away from his lap. Sky looked away for a minute and then smiled again.

"Basch? Yes, that sounds like him." She chuckled. She looked at Cloud again and saw that he was blinking away tears.

"Sweetie, you have to move on now. Not every parent gets to be part of their child's life, but their always happy to know that their child does have one. That's the greatest gift a child can give, you know?" She moved closer to her son and placed her frail arm around his shoulders.

"It's just hard," Cloud mumbled.

"I know." She agreed.

I know.

"Can we not talk about this anymore?" Cloud asked sheepishly, tensing his shoulders. His mother nodded.

"Okay sweetie. There only getting to the good questions now anyway." She smiled, withdrawing her arm. Cloud looked at her fondly for a minute, appreciating her. He really did love her.

They stayed watching the TV for two more hours until Sky yawned and informed Cloud she was going to bed. Cloud decided to stay up for a while longer, not feeling the least bit tired.

He was some of the way into a quiz show when a sudden knock at the front door almost made him jump out of his skin.

Eyes wide, the teen slowly stood up. He stared at the door as though it were a living enemy.

"W-who is it?" His voice came out a lot raspier than he meant it. He waited with baited breath for the person to answer.

"Cloud?" It's me, Zack." Relief literally coursed through him like he had been injected with it. He swallowed, realising how dry his throat had become.

Yes, paranoia was another side effect of being stalked.

"Zack?" He asked, walking over to the door and unlocking it. The door opened to reveal a scruffy looking Zack Fair.

"Hi." The boy said meekly. Cloud tilted his head.

"Hi…?" He said back slowly, carefully.

"Can I come in?" Cloud nodded and stood out of the way to let his friend in. The other walked into the apartment, saying nothing.

"Is everything okay?" The younger inquired, taking in Zack's haggard form.

"Yeah, why?" The answer was lame. Cloud licked his lips.

"It's uh, ten o'clock Zack." He said with a nervous chuckle. Zack looked at the clock, pursing his lips.

"Oh." He muttered, the blond was about to say something else when Zack spoke again. "So uh, Tifa and I broke up." He said, calmly. Very calmly.

Cloud inhaled deeply.

"Oh," he said softly, trying to look more sincere than he felt and feeling awful about it, "that's really bad Zack. I'm sorry." Cloud placed his hand on his shoulder.

"It's actually okay." The boy said and Cloud scoffed. "It is."

"Why don't we sit?" Cloud offered, gesturing towards the couch. The other boy nodded and they both sat down. Cloud clicked the television off and folded his legs, turning to face his friend. "What happened?" he asked, trying to make his voice sound more dull and still feeling awful that he had to try.

"Uh nothing. I don't even really know. It was kind of the way we broke up that's bothering me." The older teen answered, staring down at his hands. Cloud nodded.

"Was she mad?" He took a guess. Zack shook his head.

"No, she just… it was bad for the both of us." The blond nodded, licking his lips.

"Well I'm sorry. Tifa's nice." He sat down and picked up a cushion to place it on his lap.

"Yeah, she is nice. She's a good girlie." Zack clicked his tongue. "I was an asshole to her."

"No." Cloud shook his head, his fingers playing with some loose threads on the cushion.

"Yeah." Zack chuckled bitterly. "I was. Big Mog-head."

"You'll probably be back together tomorrow."

Zack clicked his tongue.

"Don't think so." He sighed heavily. "Was pretty bad…"

The younger teen nodded and flapped his lips together. He felt terrible because the others words were making him… happy. What kind of person was he? His best friend was telling him that he had broken up with a girl he liked, and the more serious it sounded; the happier he felt. He was a bad friend.

"Um…"

Something clicked in the kitchen and the darker haired boy looked towards it. In the space of about six seconds, Cloud took the time to trace his eyes along the strong structure of his tanned jawbone. It was…attractive. The way his ponytail hung loosely over his collar, black shiny hair brushing against his cheek.

All he could think of is how much of a fool Tifa was.

Zack turned back to him and he forced his strange thoughts away.

"Anyway, I'm not even bothered about working it out. To be honest."

Cloud rose a blond eyebrow and stared at him in an 'are you serious' manner. Zack dropped his leather covered shoulders and glowered.

"I'm a stuffed mog."

"Maybe…"

"That's not supportive chocobo-head."

Cloud shrugged. He was worried that his happiness would show on his face so he pressed the cushion beneath his nose, and brought his eyes to meet the other boy's.

"Well you said you aren't… wait why aren't you bothered?" He blurted.

"What?"

"Why aren't you bothered about getting back together? I thought you were really into her."

Zack rubbed his lower lip with his thumb before widening his eyes.

"I'm just… not interested in her anymore. That's what it's all about. She knew."

Cloud felt his heartbeat speed up.

"Well you're strange... How did she know?"

"Dunno."

"Were you… did she catch you with someone else?"

"No,"

"Then how? Is there… someone else?"

It was strange the way Zack's entire demeanour rapidly changed. His limbs became straight and tight, his shoulders straightened and his face looked strained. He flexed his fingers against his knees and tutted a few times.

"That's what she seems to think." He all but sang.

Cloud should have been pleased that he had a genuine reason to frown. But he wasn't.

"Well is it true?" His tone was slightly scathing. Zack didn't seem to notice.

"I don't… could be."

The blond felt like tugging at his hair, why did it seem like his friend had lost his brain?

"Zack."

"I am after someone else. I just don't know what to do about it."

Cloud felt his chest twinge tightly.

"Who?" He questioned softly.

"…" Zack smiled softly, pushing his hair back from his face and revealing his bright eyes. Cloud lowered the cushion from his mouth and looked at him with a furrowed brow.

"I'm gonna go now."

Cloud shook his head and blinked in statement as the weirdo got to his feet.

"What, why?" He questioned in a high-pitched tone. Zack stretched his arms above his head and chuckled.

"It's late…"

"But you have to tell me who…"

Zack bent down, and placed his hand on the top of the boys head.

"See you at school tomorrow, na Cloudy?" He ruffled the boy's hair, causing him to blush and bat his hand away.

"You're a freak."

The older boy winked and stood up.

"See you tomorrow." He chuckled again and headed for the exit.

Once the door clicked shut Cloud let the cushion fall from his lap. Something felt strange, and he didn't know why he felt so…light.

Excitement tingled in his veins, and he didn't have the effort to feel disgusted by the ridiculous grin on his face.

It stayed there for the rest of the night, although he would never admit it.

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;;

The day seemed brighter that morning. Brighter than it had felt in a long time. Cloud enjoyed the coolness of the air as he made his way to school. He was excited; he didn't know what was actually going to happen once he got to school.

He smiled to himself as he crossed the empty street with ease. He hadn't forgotten about Clarence or Seifer but for once he was able to ignore it. To focus on the present. It was nice.

He had never felt so happy to see the roof of the school building a couple of blocks ahead of him. For the first time in months it wasn't a dawning sight.

The sight disappeared completely when he felt something press against his face, blocking his eyes. Confused, he started to panic when he felt something encircle him and then he was being pulled backwards, his vision becoming even darker. Opening his mouth to shout, it quickly turned into a loud gasp when he felt something sting his hip.

"Nnnn," he tried to form a word but it was muffled by the thing covering his face. He started hyperventilating, shifting and jolting to get out of the suffocating hold. He opened his mouth to try and shout again when a strange tingling feeling spread through his face, making it numb. His eyes widened when he realised his whole body felt the same. His legs started to sag and his arms wouldn't move.

Everything was distant after that. His body was lifted into the air and his face was uncovered. It didn't help, he couldn't get his eyelids to open and his head lolled back uselessly. There was someone moaning. He didn't know who.

A blast of pink in front of his eyes was the last thing he saw before everything dissipated and he was forced into nothingness.

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**So there it is. The revised edition. The big change is obviously that Cloud and Zack didn't kiss. I'm sorry for those who liked the original scene but personally I found it rushed and a tad corny and it didn't suit what I have in mind for the rest of the story well. Thanks for re-reading. Look forward to hearing what you think of my new chapter.**


	13. XIII

**Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy or Square Enix.**

* * *

"That's it then?" Sephiroth nodded at the man's words, handing him the envelope. The man took the offering but as he went to pull his hand back he was startled to find his wrist caught in a strong grip.

"I expect there's no need to remind you of the consequences of your indiscretion?" The words were spoken calmly but with an underlying menace that made the man's voice catch in his throat.

"O-of course," he started shakily, "you know I'm too far gone for that to be a threat now." He felt the hand around his wrist tighten and looked up to see two smoldering green eyes scanning him. A few tense seconds followed, his breath was baited and sweat started to pour down his neck.

"Good." With that, his wrist was released and he closed his eyes. When he opened them again the General had already turned away and was making his way back to the huge house, in all his demonic grace.

"Fuck." He muttered, making his own way back to his helicopter.

Sephiroth waited until he was back in the house and the door was closed to allow himself a small chuckle. Pushing himself from the door he was leaning on, he made his way through the large hall and into his new living room.

This house was so quite, every little hum or squeak was echoed as it travelled up the grand stone walls. Some may have found it eerie but Sephiroth found it soothing. Especially as he stood there, deathly still, and the sound of soft even breathing filled the room. He closed his eyes and listened as his own heartbeat and the breathing joined together in harmony.

They were together now.

He walked over to the couch and brought his eyes down towards the form resting peacefully on it. He couldn't connect it, that the object of all his previous frustration and desire was the small person laid vulnerably before him.

It was surreal; he took in the boys gorgeous features and tried to remind himself that he wasn't looking through a screen, that if he reached forward, soft skin not hard plastic or air would greet his hand. He ran his fingers along the top of the couch, smiling with narrowed eyes at the boy.

Clouds face was flushed with heavy sleep, the drug he had been given was highly potent and even after seven hours it was only half way through draining from his system. He felt a thrill run through his body when he thought about how he had drugged him. It was so quick and violent; he was sure it had terrorized Cloud half to death. He didn't feel guilty for doing it though, not when he got to take the beautiful boy into his arms, not when he got to carry him to the helicopter. Not when, for six hours, he got to cradle him in his arms as the world flowed beneath them.

Cloud was as light as a chocobo feather, especially for a man with the strength Sephiroth possessed, but everywhere the boy touched him he felt crushed. His legs, chest, shoulder…there was a tingling pressure at every point of contact. He couldn't believe the extent to which Cloud affected him, physically and emotionally.

He shook his head, realizing that he didn't have to think about it anymore. Cloud was with him now. He would be with him forever.

He walked around to the front of the couch and crouched down. Clouds face was turned away from him. That wouldn't do. He reached out and cupped Clouds cheek, turning his face towards him.

He was fucking beautiful.

Moving his hair back from his face, Sephiroth leaned in until his nose almost touched Clouds cheek. He ran his thumb from the boy's nose to his cheek bone, realizing that light freckles dotted that area. He never noticed that. A rush of excitement thrummed in his chest; there was so much more about this boy to explore, both mind and body, and he had all the time in the world to do it.

Cloud let out a soft moan and he was brought back from the musing he didn't realize he had begun.

He moved the hand resting on the boys face around to the back of his shoulders and placed his other beneath his slightly bent knees. With no amount of effort at all, he stood up. Clouds head fell backwards and his legs swung back and forth as he carried him out of the room and through a long hallway. His boots collided noisily against the expensive marble floor until they stopped in front of an expensive Iifa tree wood cabinet.

He left Clouds legs down, tightening his arms around his shoulders in order to support him. Cloud's head fell forward to his chest and he couldn't help burying his face in that soft yellow hair for a short moment. He nudged the boys head back and stepped closer towards the cabinet.

Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a silver key. The side of the cabinet, as is standard with the type, had consecutive designs running up and down its length. One would never notice the small keyhole hidden within one of those repetitive swirls lined up and down the wood. Unless they had put it there. Sephiroth had to lean down in order to put the key in and once that was done and it was unlocked, he pulled the cabinet from the wall, revealing its true nature; a secret door.

He left the key in the lock and picked Cloud up properly again. He maneuvered the teens head to lean on his chest so he wouldn't get hurt as he got through the hole previously covered by the cabinet.

In a sincere state of bliss, Sephiroth made his way down a short staircase, feeling like it was symbolic of his decent into a new life. Once he got to the bottom his hand sought out a switch and he flicked on the light.

Once the bulb illuminated it, the room they were in was revealed to be a large, minimally decorated space. The walls were painted a soft blue with a spotless cream carpet covering the floor. A large pine closet, a 55 inch plasma television, a locker and a bed were the only items that occupied the room and it made the large area look rather plain and impersonal. A fully stocked bathroom was also attached to the room.

There was no window.

He carried his perfect bundle over to the king-sized bed and put him down gently. Cloud immediately sunk into the soft mattress, his body was probably happy to be able to lie down properly for the first time since it was forced into slumber.

Sephiroth leaned his elbow on the bed and ran his other hand from Clouds neck to his hair, moving his face closer to the boys. He stroked those incredibly soft locks and closed his eyes so he could feel the boy's breath on his face. He couldn't believe it; the boy, his boy, was with him, breathing the same air as him. They were sharing air. Cloud was exhaling and he was inhaling that. It was so intimate that the silver haired demi-god gave in and leaned down to press his lips against the boy's soft cheek.

He made a sound half between a sigh and a moan at the taste of his boy. Skin always had a salty kind of taste and he wasn't going to exaggerate it with false similes, but the fact that it was Clouds skin just made it seem delicious. He kissed the boys cheek a few times, and then moved to his nose before travelling with his lips and planting a small kiss on his eye lid, smiling when it caused the boy to twitch.

Reluctantly pulling himself away, he sat up straight and breathed heavily. He pulled at the leather sticking to his chest, trying to get air onto the covered skin. His blood felt like it was boiling and his skin was hot. Just from some baby kisses?

No, it wasn't just from the kisses. It was the whole thing. It was just over ten months since he had first discovered this special person. Ten months of frustration and planning and scheming and longing, all leading to where he was now. It was indescribable. If someone were to tell him that one trip to a grocery store would lead him to where he as now, living in a new house in a new place with a new life, he would have scoffed. He had only been a statue before then, living but not being alive. This…child had done this to him, and now his soul belonged to him.

That was the price for waking the dead.

He held his hair back and looked down at the boys clothes. Cloud was dressed unusually nice today; Sephiroth had only seen those types of clothes on the teen when he was going to a party or club of some sort.

He knew exactly why too. They would address that later.

Remembering that Cloud needed undisturbed sleep in order to wear the drug from his system, he decided to get on with what he had to do. He took off the leather gloves he was wearing and then slipped his hand beneath the boy's waist, applying pressure and lifting him into a sloppy sitting position. He loved the feeling of supporting the teen; it made him seem so vulnerable. He was vulnerable.

He tugged off the leather jacket first, reasoning that Cloud would be a lot more comfortable in his T-shirt. The boy's torso was placed back down and Sephiroth proceeded to remove his shoes and socks. He contemplated taking off the heavy jeans but thought better of it. He didn't want to do anything to make Cloud any more scared than he was bound to be when he woke up.

Next he rummaged through the teens pants pockets, taking particular delight in the back ones. He wasn't touching him inappropriately; he just had to apply a little pressure in order to get his hand in. Well, what the boy didn't know…

There was nothing much in the pockets; five Gil, keys and of course the cell phone. He had heard the phone ring a few times during the ride there but ignored it. Probably that insolent Zackary Fair.

He chuckled; that pup shouldn't bother him anymore. He would have Cloud forever while Zack could only dream of him from now on. He let a sadistic smile spread across his face at the thought of just how torn apart that boy would be. Oh, how he wished he would be there to see it.

He pocketed the phone and pulled the blanket rolled at the end of the bed up to cover the boy's small form. Cloud let out a soft moan and turned on his side, nuzzling his face into the pillow. Sephiroth felt a twinge, almost painful, at the sight. He was his. He belonged to him now.

He gave the boy one last, slow, kiss on his forehead, patting the white blanket in further, before standing up and making his way out of the room. Only looking back once to say.

"Welcome home, Cloud."

* * *

Zack pushed the school doors aside, not noticing that it had almost hit off someone. He was distracted; nervousness and confusion coursing through his veins.

Cloud hadn't shown up for school that day. He had said he was going to the night before but he hadn't showed or sent a message or anything. He always sent a message, well except for that one time but that was different. Zack couldn't help but think that…he had freaked him out or something. He was a bit flustered the night before, and couldn't really remember what he had said or what way he had acted at Cloud's apartment. He might have come across as a bit of a loon actually. Cloud might have caught onto something and got freaked out.

The boy cringed, thinking back, he had acted cryptically and maybe a bit creepy.

"Oh, Gaia." He muttered, speeding up his pace. The end of school couldn't have come slower; he had even been tempted to just leave at lunch but then decided against it. He might be reading too much into this. He hadn't even said anything to the boy, and rushing over there like that with no real reason would have been pretty embarrassing. Especially if the boy had no idea what he was talking about. So he had waited.

He approached the parking lot and once he got to his bike he jumped on without his helmet.

Gripping the handle bars tightly, he let out a sigh. Would he be pushing it by going over to see the boy now? No, he had to find out what Cloud was doing. If the boy had caught onto what he had been saying then they needed to talk about it, no matter how extremely and horribly awkward it would be. Zack could accept that the boy didn't want him that way; he honestly hadn't expected anything to happen, not yet anyway. He just didn't want everything to be ruined. They were friends first, he couldn't lose that.

He just needed to know.

Shaking his head and letting out a huff of breath, he kicked off the brake and started the engine. The ride to Cloud's only took ten minutes, probably because he was faster than usual-actually getting honked at and called unpleasant names a few times by the other drivers but oh well- and once he got there he hastily parked and then…stopped.

Lifting his purple eyes up towards Clouds apartment, he re-thought his actions. What was he going to do? He didn't even know if Cloud had any idea what he was talking about the night before. He could just be sick or something. Though he usually messaged him when he was... Uh, why was he such a mog-head? Why did he go over there at all when his own thoughts were so messed up? He should have waited. Patience, as Angeal said, was the key.

Licking his bottom lip, Zack finally made himself jog through the parking lot and up the stairs. He stopped outside the apartment door. Lifting his hand, he opened and closed it a few times, trying to ease some tension.

"Hmm," He growled. He ran the hand through his hair before clenching it and bringing it down to bang against the door.

After a few seconds he heard someone approach from the inside and his stomach became heavy with nervousness. There was a jingling of keys and Zack was surprised when the door was opened and Sky's smiling face greeted him. Cloud usually answered. Was he mad? The dark-haired teen didn't know if had done anything to make him that mad. He hadn't done anything yet at all! Not fair.

"Zack?" Sky said opening the door wider, "why are you knocking? Did Cloud loose his keys?" All Zack's nervousness disappeared at that, replaced by a strong confusion.

"What?" He asked, tilting his head. She gave him a strange look.

"Aren't you here with Cloud?" She looked out past his shoulder, probably looking for her son. He didn't want to insult her, so he calmly said.

"Um, Cloud didn't come to school today. Isn't he here?" He felt his breath hitch when he saw her pale eyes widen.

"Cloud's went to school today, he shouted into me when he was leaving. He brought his lunch with him." She brought a skinny hand to her chest and looked at him questioningly. Zack shook his head, putting an expression of denial on his face.

"He didn't. I was waiting at the front gates for him." For a lot more reasons than you know. Or he knows, maybe.

"Oh, well…come in Zack." Sky motioned him inside; her eyes were wide as they danced around the room in thought. Zack was just as worried but tried to remain logical.

"He must have skipped." He said, not believing his own words. Cloud never would have ditched. He wasn't that type of person. Thinking about it, he started to become more frantic. He walked up towards the boy's room, just making sure, and the woman trailed behind him.

The room was empty. His bed was dressed and there was no sign of his bag.

"This is strange."

He turned and placed his hand on Sky's bony shoulder, feeling her trembling from this unexpected surprise. He gave her a small, strained smile.

"Sky," he said calmly, "I'm going to go out and look for him. Maybe he did ditch." He sighed. "I'll call if I find him." He gave her one last smile which she didn't return and he didn't feel, then headed out the door.

It was strange, a moment ago his worst fear was that Cloud was avoiding him, now if that was the reason the boy was missing, it would be the best news possible.

Away from sight, his face portrayed all the worry and foreboding he felt.

* * *

The dark sky was a beautiful contrast to the stainless snow covered earth. Modeoheim may have been a deserted death valley, but one could not ignore the beauty of the place. Did one always have to go to the depths of the earth to find true beauty?

Sephiroth brought his gaze away from the window when the phone in his hand began to vibrate. He smirked as the name 'Zack' came up on the screen. That was the thirty-sixth call the phone had received during the course of the evening. Most were from Zackary although there was a lot from 'Mom' too. It gave him pleasure to imagine those people as they realized that the special person they had always taken for granted was gone from their lives forever.

Handsome, cheery Zackary would transform into a lifeless, problematic young man with his bright future erased. Sephiroth believed Zack really did love his boy and he hoped he was right, because the wound would be so much worse if it penetrated deep. As for that diseased widow? With any luck the grief would put her out of her misery once and for all.

He placed the phone on the windowsill and turned to make his way towards the kitchen. Once in the room, he strolled past the lush marble countertops and white ceramic tiles to the large silver fridge at the end of the room. It, like all the other kitchen equipment, was the latest in Tuesti technology. He gripped the silver handle and pulled it open. The fridge had been stocked to the last with food he himself wouldn't touch but he was sure Cloud would; yoghurt, chocobo meat, peanut butter and other foods he thought were popular amongst young people.

He reached into the drawer and took out a small green bottle with the word Potion written on the label. It was cool in his hand, and if he were a normal human he would have had to move it from one to the other in order to avoid discomfort.

He grabbed a bottle of water then closed the fridge with his elbow and looked up at the clock. Yes, he smirked, it was time.

His pace was languid as he walked out of the kitchen and down to into the room where his caged cherub was sleeping, blissfully unaware of how much his life was to change once he awoke. He couldn't get over the feeling of walking into the same room as Cloud. A room he was providing for him. Everything Cloud had now, his food, his clothes, his home; it was all given to him by Sephiroth. The thought sent jolts of pleasure to his groin; Cloud was under his control.

He walked over to the bed and his breath got caught in his throat, as it always did, at the sight of his boy. Cloud looked so comfortable, his small body was engulfed in the thick blankets and only his closed eyes and mass of yellow hair were visible in the mess. He was breathing deeply and one of his hands was resting at the edge of the mattress.

He sat on the edge of the bed and placed his hand over Clouds visible one. It was warm, like he had put his hand on a heater, and soft, he ran his thumb affectionately over the small but masculine fingers.

He stayed like that for a while, content with just being close to his boy, until eventually the blond started moving more, moaning slightly. Sephiroth sat back and watched as Cloud began twisting and turning, tossing his head from side to side. The drug made waking up disorientating and difficult.

He leaned down and cupped the teen's cheek in order to stop his moving. Cloud let out a soft moan, his eyes still closed. Sephiroth felt his heart beat with excitement, this was the first time Cloud would see him. They had met before, on that faithful night and once after, but this was different. He had worn a mask back then. Now Cloud would get to see him for who he really was. He was the only person allowed that privilege.

Excitement thrummed in his chest as Cloud became more and more conscious.

"Shhhh." He whispered, Cloud moaned louder. "Shhhhh." He ran a circle around the boy's cheek with his thumb, feeling like it was something he wanted to do. "Cloud?" He called softly, loving the sound of it on his tongue.

"Humm," Cloud made a noise that caused Sephiroth to smile at its cuteness.

"Cloud. Wake up." He whispered again in a soft tone no one had ever heard him use before. He narrowed his eyes when Clouds eyelids finally twitched and squinted open. Sephiroth watched as the boy blinked away the grogginess and when he was mostly awake, he popped the cap off the potion and cupped Clouds chin, steadying his face so he could bring the small bottle to his mouth.

"Drink." He coaxed. Cloud wasn't fully awake so his body responded to the command without thought. The drug he had been injected with would dehydrate the boy's body, leaving his throat dry and sore, Sephiroth figured the potion would help with that as well as making the teen feel generally more comfortable.

"Good. Good boy." Cloud continued sucking until he drained the last of the small bottle. It was strange but he was reminded of a mother nursing her child. The child would love its mother more than anyone else and would depend on her for everything it needed.

The parallels were clear.

Once Cloud finished the potion he slumped back down against the pillow, breathing heavily. Sephiroth sat back and watched as he woke up fully.

As his vision cleared, Cloud was confused to see a vast white ceiling. He moved his eyes to the right and noticed the walls were painted a soft blue. The walls in his room were cream and his ceiling was not as large or spotlessly white. Where was he? His mind wouldn't work; he couldn't form a proper thought. Feeling frustration and fear rise in his stomach, he opened his mouth. "Wha-" that was when he realized how dry and sore his throat felt, he broke into a fit of coughs and tears started to sting his eyes. It hurt, like sand paper was scraping his throat.

Something was pressed against his lips and went to jerk away, that was until he felt the cool liquid touch his tongue and his body instinctively began to drink what it realized to be water. Once he was full and the bottle was taken away he opened his mouth to speak again, softer this time.

"Where am I?" He hadn't turned his head to the side yet, he didn't know why but something was telling him not to.

"You're in my home." A voice to his left informed him. It was deep and smooth and he was sure it was familiar. From where? He closed his eyes, trying hard to remember.

He coughed again. Had he been in an accident? Was this a hospital? No, they said it was a home? He took a breath, clearing his throat, "Why?"

Sephiroth smiled; this was the moment. Things were going to get very real for Cloud now. He knew the boy's reaction was going to be bad and he didn't mind. He would allow Cloud his fear at first, he was only a child really, and this was bound to be scary for him.

"I brought you here." He said it emotionlessly, as if it were a fact and not a Gaia-shattering statement that would send the boy spiraling into a realm of despair and confusion.

"How?"

"You don't remember?"

Clouds eyes widened as the words triggered his brain back into working. Flashbacks started to assault his mind without him having any control over them.

_Briste Street._

_Traffic lights. _

_School rooftop._

_Darkness. _

_Hands._

_Pulling._

_Stinging. _

_Moaning. Screaming. _

_Darkness._

He gasped as it dawned on him; he had been attacked. His heart was beating in his ears and he could feel his bones shaking. He blinked away tears and slowly, as if he were paralyzed, he turned his head to face the owner of the voice.

Sephiroth smiled as Clouds terror filled gaze slowly, ever so slowly, made its way to him. His heartbeat sped up and he tried to keep his expression as genuine as possible, a difficult task for someone who had been schooling his emotions to reveal only what he wanted since he was five.

Cloud expected to be horrified, terrified at the sight of the person who had 'brought him here' but he didn't expect to feel…shock. Deep, Gaia-shattering shock. He knew this man, everyone did. Those catlike emerald eyes and flowing silver hair couldn't be mistaken.

"Sephiroth." He whispered, eyes widening in wonder. The man smiled and leaned forward, making him tense.

"It's good to see you, Cloud." He started hyperventilating, grabbing for the blankets and slowly pulling himself into a sitting position. He didn't know how to handle this. A stranger, he would deal with, it would be terrible, but a fat demented stranger would be easier to understand than this. Why would he be in Sephiroth's, the most powerful SOLDIER in the world, hero and idol to millions, house? Perhaps he had interpreted the situation wrong.

There was something about this man though, something wasn't right. Like he wasn't human.

"W-why am I h-here?" He couldn't stop stuttering, he felt sick. "I was at…did you save me?" Sephiroth was a hero right? There had to be a logical reason he was here. He almost scoffed at himself for panicking. He felt sick.

Sephiroth laughed at that. He _had _saved the boy, but in a different way. Still, he felt flattered that his presence had affected the boy so. That was good; Cloud would come to know him as the most important figure in his life; his master and lover and god.

"We can talk about that later. How are you feeling?" Cloud was getting too worked up, he didn't need to hear anything too important right now.

Cloud pushed himself forward, taking the blankets off his legs. Sephiroth didn't stop him; in fact, he stood up and allowed Cloud to stand up on his weak legs.

"I'm okay." Cloud said, his bottom lip shaking as he sniffled. "I just need to go home and rest." He had over-reacted. Sephiroth wasn't going to keep him here. Why would he?

Sephiroth gave a sympathetic smile, tilting his head. He really did feel pity at the look of raw desperation on the boys face. He wasn't leaving; they both knew it.

"Cloud," he sighed, still smiling, "you won't be going home. Ever." Was that too harsh?

Cloud took a sharp intake of breath. "But-" his words got caught in his throat as his eyes flooded with tears. What was this? What was this? This was a dream, he had been under a lot of pressure lately and it was causing him to hallucinate. Yes, it was so fake. Sephiroth kidnapping him? It was crazy, there was no way it was real.

W-what was happening? Why was he here?

He felt a sudden pressure in the back of his throat. "I'm gonna be sick." Sephiroth stepped forward quickly and led the retching boy to the bathroom. He was sure that if Cloud weren't distracted he would have protested against the hand on his shoulder but as it were the boy barely had time to get to the toilet bowl before he was throwing up his entire breakfast.

Cloud winced, his already sore throat burning as the acidic vomit was forced through it. He leaned heavily against the toilet bowl and continued coughing and dry heaving for a few more minutes. From the corner of his eye he could see the man, Sephiroth, leaning against the wall with his arms folded. He knew it was stupid but he felt humiliated at how pathetic he must have seemed, especially to such a man.

Sephiroth regarded the sobbing teen on the floor with an emotionless gaze. He didn't enjoy seeing Cloud in such a state, not entirely anyway, but he had expected it. Even though it was pathetic, Cloud seemed to enjoy his old life. He may have been miserable but he loved his home and the people there. The change would, without a doubt, be upsetting for him.

He picked up a white face cloth from the porcelain sink and approached Cloud cautiously, extending his arm to offer it to him. He couldn't help but smile when the boy jerked away and wiped his mouth with his bare wrist.

Cloud cringed at the taste on his tongue and swallowed a few times to get rid of it. He placed his hand on the wall and pulled himself upwards, trying to be as defensive as he could. He kept his face away from the silver haired man and stared at the wall in front of him.

His head was spinning, what was happening? Why was he here? Was it a dream? This morning he had been walking to school and now he was…here? He didn't understand. What did this man want?

"Do you feel better now Cloud?" Sephiroth asked with a tilt of his head. He knew he was being smart with the boy, but he genuinely wasn't used to comforting people. It wasn't in his nature; Angeal and Genesis were the only people he had ever really spoken informally to and that certainly wasn't emotional or comforting dialogue. Cloud would get used to his ways eventually.

Cloud felt a shiver run through his spine when the man said his name. How did he know it? He didn't care, he just wanted to leave.

"I-I need to go home." He said softly, working up the courage to face the man. Sephiroth looked back at him with a cold gaze that made him shiver. He was afraid. Terrified. This was real and this man had him at his mercy. What did he want? Would he be killed?

The thought sent a sob through his chest and he had to look away again. He looked back sharply with wide eyes as the man began approaching him.

"Sto-" but Sephiroth only went as far as the toilet bowl and, keeping eye contact with him, flushed it. Cloud jumped at the sound, breathing heavily. Sephiroth smirked.

"Why don't we go back into the room, hmm?" He motioned towards the door. Cloud ran his eyes over him, Sephiroth was literally the embodiment of masculinity; everything about him screamed power and respect. Cloud had always admired him, as had every other boy his age; he was the General of the Shinra army and most powerful SOLDIER on the planet after all.

Now though, everything he used to admire about the man; his strength, his skill, his intelligence, it all turned into more reasons to be afraid. He was afraid.

"Come on." Sephiroth opened the door wider and looked at the teen expectantly. Cloud only sniffed and moved further into the wall. He couldn't help but feel slightly satisfied at the state of the boy, but he didn't want him to suffer too much. Feeling impatient, he moved towards Cloud and went to grab his arm gently, "Clo-"

"No." He was cut off when Cloud jerked his arm away from him and with a withering look, the blond made his way out of the bathroom. He followed on, amusement evident on his face.

He still couldn't believe Cloud was with him. He thought that once the boy woke up and they were interacting it would hit him but it still felt like everything was happening from a distance. It was just strange…fast. One minute he was admiring him through dreams and glass and the next he… owned him?

Cloud walked straight over to the far wall and only turned around when he was almost touching it. He kept his eyes lowered and folded his arms tightly to himself. He couldn't believe he was in this situation, it wasn't real. Who was this person? Well he knew _who_ he was but not what kind of person he was.

It didn't feel like he was going home.

He didn't understand what was happening, all he knew was that he had been attacked, possibly drugged and was now in a room with a man who had just said he would never go home.

Never go home? Oh Gaia, he was going to die. Why else would he be here? He was going to die.

"When will I be going home? " He bit out again, wiping a tear that was sliding down his cheek. It was hard to look firm when you were crying like a toddler. Sephiroth smiled again, staring at him intently, making his insides squirm.

"I've already answered that." The man said calmly. Cloud closed his eyes.

"Why? W-what do you want?" He pressed himself closer to the wall, feeling his chin tremble as he tried to hold in a sob.

It was hard for Sephiroth to keep in a laugh at that question. What did he want? The foolish boy had no idea as to the extent of what he had asked. He pulled his hair out of his face and looked towards the ceiling, thinking on what the right thing to say would be. When he looked back down he realized just how small his boy looked. Standing in front of the plain blue wall, he really did look like a cherub; all shiny and vulnerable. The wall even looked like a sky behind him. All that was missing were the clouds. Ironic?

"We have plenty of time to talk about that Cl-"

"No," Cloud shouted suddenly, he took a deep breath and coughed a little, "I'd like to know why it is I am to be kept here against my will, please." He finished in a clipped tone, trying to stand straight and be as brave as he could. He inwardly cringed; that was not the best way to talk to a kidnapper but…he had to stand up for himself, right?

Wrong, he decided when he caught the man's smoldering gaze. He let his shoulders fall and backed into the wall again, courage dissipating.

Sephiroth didn't like being interrupted, he didn't like people saying no to him and he certainly didn't like people getting an attitude with him. Cloud had done all three. He let the fury shine in his eyes as he approached the trembling youth.

Cloud felt all his courage melt away and he started to panic as the most intimidating man he had ever encountered towered over him with an eerie look in his eyes. He wanted to move but found his bones grinding off each other when he tried. He was literally frozen in place.

Sephiroth stopped in front of the boy who was now shaking like a leaf. He looked at Cloud and only then did he realize how pale the blond was, and how frail he looked.

Closing his eyes, he clenched his jawbone and took a deep breath, exhaling heavily through his nose.

He had to control himself. Cloud's body was still under the effects of the drug and that, combined with the shock of the situation, was hard enough on the teen without him terrorizing him as well.

He opened his eyes again and noticed that Cloud was looking up at him with wide, scared eyes. He gave the boy a genuine smile, his fondness for him shining through.

"We'll talk about that at a different time," He said softly, Cloud looked like he was going to say something but then shut his mouth and looked down. "You need to relax for a while Cloud. This is your room now, the television has any channel you want, you've already seen the bathroom," Cloud cringed at that, "there are some clothes for you in the closet, you might find them more comfortable. I'll bring you some food later." Sephiroth stood back and watched the boy for a reaction.

Cloud was in despair. He felt sick. His room? Clothes in the closet? What was going on? Had the man planned this? Or was he one of the many victims who had occupied this room before him? That idea caused his heart rate to speed up. He shuddered, wrapping his arms around his stomach. He was going to die. He was going to die alone in this place with this man. He would never see his Mom or Zack or Yuffie or anyone ever again. He began hyperventilating. He couldn't handle this.

Sephiroth decided to leave the teen alone with his thoughts. As much as he would have liked to stay with his new charge, he thought it best to leave him alone to gather himself and wear off the drug completely.

With no more words between them, Sephiroth turned and made his way up the stairs and out of the room.

Once he was outside and the door was closed he sighed heavily, bringing his hands up to look at them. His body was burning; that boy had no idea just how much he had affected him. Sephiroth hadn't even known until now. He had known owning his boy would make anything he had done before; stalking Cloud or pretending to be Basch, look miniscule. He had no idea, however, that such small contact with the boy would make every inch of his skin come alive with sensation, every hair on his body stand straight, he didn't know it would make his blood rush and boil in every part of his body. He was a vessel of need, a need he was so close to fulfilling.

He lifted the hand which had touched the boy's perfect shoulder and brought it towards his face, sniffing the palm and groaning. Oh yes, he would enjoy this.

* * *

Sky sat up straight when she heard someone approaching her door. She wiped at her eyes but made no attempt to hide the worry that was so deeply edged on her face.

The person began to open the door and she couldn't help but hope it was her little boy, coming back from where ever he was hiding.

Her stomach dropped when raven, not golden, spikes came into her view.

Zack opened the door wide, standing stoically in the doorway. He looked tired, his hair was messed, and his face was pale and flushed. What scared her most though, were his eyes. They were wide and dazed, looking at her with a hopelessness she had never seen in them before.

"Anything?" She asked, fully aware of the answer. Zack raised his brows, shaking his head.

"No," he said, his lips were shaking. "He's gone."

_He's gone._

* * *

**Poor…everybody! Well, except Seph! I told you it was gonna get darker and it still is!**

**Thank you for the reviews, I'm glad you like how I portray the emotions of the characters! Especially Seph, you all seem to like creepy Seph? Kind of?**

**Please, if you like the chapter, review!**


	14. XIV

**Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

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Breathe in.

Breathe out.

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

Just breathe.

Just breathe, that's what Cloud had been doing for...how long now? He didn't know. He didn't care. It was all he could do to keep himself in control.

He had tried to think at first. After that...man had left him alone. He tried to make sense of the situation; figure out how he could approach it. He soon found that impossible. He just didn't understand. What was happening? The last thing he could remember was walking to school. He had almost been there when...

He shuddered, bringing his chin down so it rubbed against his chest. He brought his knees in closer and curled his arms around them, trying to be as small as he could in this place. Where was this place anyway? How long had he been asleep?

Was he still asleep?

Feeling sickness rise in his stomach again, he shifted and breathed deeply, closing his eyes.

The movement made him realise how numb his lower body had become; he hadn't moved from where he was since Sephiroth had left him alone. He didn't think he could even if he wanted to. His legs felt like jelly and his torso felt heavy; like it was full of sand. He was stuck.

Opening his eyes and turning his head towards the ceiling, Cloud breathed again, trying to get the sickness to go away. It was impossible; there was just too much to be afraid of.

Why was he here? He tried to convince himself that Sephiroth had brought him here for a reason; that he would be able to leave soon. He wasn't a fool though; he couldn't just disregard the man's earlier words.

"_This is your room now_."

"_You won't be going home. Ever."_

No, he wouldn't be leaving. Not by this man's rule anyway.

The teen swallowed heavily, wincing as it jarred his dry and sore throat. He moved his gaze lazily over to the bottle of water resting on the bed. It would be a relief now; the cold liquid, but he couldn't bring himself to want it enough to move. He never felt like moving again, because moving in this place would mean he was acknowledging its existence, and that was something he wasn't ready to do; not yet.

He rolled his head forward, staring blankly at the blue wall before him.

He wanted to leave now. He wanted to go home. Whatever this was, he wanted it to end. This man had attacked him, drugged him and now he was here. That's all he knew.

What would happen to him? Everything dark he had ever heard flashed through his head.

Kidnappers, psychos, rapists, sadists, bodies found decapitated, burned, tortured, ripped apart, missing organs. Every possible bad thing. He thought of all the times he had heard a terrible piece of news and gave a half-hearted thought towards it; interested and emphatic. Now he realised how ignorant he had truly been. Like the whole thing with that flower girl. He knew her, and though she was strange she was kind and good. He didn't even think about what she must have gone through. He was so selfish.

Those people had gone through the same thing he was feeling now; all the fear and anxiety and confusion. Then they had been killed in the most terrible and cruellest of ways. Would that be him? Would some kid thousands of miles away hear about his death and say 'oh, that's horrible' before going back to living their lives? He felt a lump form in his throat and his bottom lip began to shake. He didn't want to die.

Coughing a little, he let his thoughts drift to the reason he was here.

Sephiroth had always been a hero. He was the symbol of good in the world. He had defended everyone against the Wutians during the war and was the General of the Shinra army. His job was to preserve life, not take it away. That couldn't be the same man as he had seen moments ago. The cold, demonic-like person who gave no sympathy or answers to him. Who had said with no remorse that he wouldn't be going home? That wasn't a hero; it was a monster. Sephiroth wasn't a monster.

Then again, no one was perfect. Everyone had dark secrets hidden beneath. Sephiroth had such a good image, such a perfect shell, maybe it made sense that only something truly horrible could be lurking beneath. Maybe this was his...hobby. Cloud gulped. Maybe he brought people down here, played with them in whatever sick way he wanted, and then got rid of them. Maybe h-

"No." Shaking his head, the blond began rocking a little, trying to distract his brain. He had to stop thinking. Thinking was bad now. He just had to breathe.

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

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The sound of clinking ice and swishing liquor filled the room, making pleasant bell-like sounds as the frozen water crashed against the expensive crystal. Sephiroth sighed, swirling the glass in his hand and looking at the clock hanging above the kitchen door.

He knew he had to leave his new charge stew for a while; to gain a weak grasp on the situation he was now in. Cloud had reacted just as he predicted, albeit the vomiting was a bit of a surprise but not unfathomable considering the strength of the drug and shock of the awakening. He knew Cloud would be scared, why wouldn't he be? Humans are creatures of habit and when taken out of their comfort zones they tend to panic, to look for things familiar and deal with it through that. That's why Cloud was alone now; Sephiroth wanted him to have a clearer mind the next time he made his appearance.

Demon-like eyes shone with glee; there was still no way the beauty wasn't going to be just as terrified the next time he saw him.

He took a sip of his scotch, turning away from the damnable clock. He knew he had to leave Cloud alone, but that didn't mean that every cell in his body wasn't craving to rush back down to that blue room and hold his boy, kiss him, feel him, squeeze him, taste him and breath him in.

Just breath.

Cracking his neck, Sephiroth decided to exit the kitchen and look for a distraction, lest his baser instincts get the better of him. He strolled, like a ghost, through the white hall and ascended up the carpeted marble staircase, every step as elegant as the one before it. His fingers made soft scraping sounds as they dragged up the mahogany rail. Everything was blissful, everything felt like foreplay. His body was aroused, but not frustrated like it was an hour ago, when the boys touch was fresh on his being; now it was in a sensual, pleasant state.

Because it knew that it would be sated eventually.

Sephiroth was a man of control.

He walked past numerous rooms, unnecessarily there since the house would always have only two inhabitants, and when he reached a particularly grand looking set of mahogany doors he pushed the left one open, noticing gladly that it didn't make a sound. He hated when things didn't work correctly.

The room he now stood in was, as he liked, sparsely decorated. However, the few items that did occupy the room were the best of their kind. The Dalmascan marble bed, for example set him back a few thousand Gil, and the brown fur bedspread from Quelb was not an inexpensive afterthought.

Placing his scotch down on the dark wood locker, he brought his hands up and began removing every scrap of leather clothing from his body. Once nude, he pulled back the thick blanket and slipped himself into the bed.

The muscles of his back seemed to groan with satisfaction as they melted into the soft mattress. Sephiroth then realised that this was the first time he'd relaxed them in four days.

Even a Mako-made God tired eventually.

His hand sought out the glass beside his bed and when he felt the coolness against his fingers he applied pressure and brought the crystal-Bought from Icicle village- to his mouth, finishing the drink in one gulp.

He put the glass back and closed his eyes, sinking down further into the pillow. He didn't know how long he'd laid like that, relaxed but not asleep, until eventually the blue eyes got blurry and the creamy skin turned black. All the colours mixed into one. And the General was asleep.

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Throbbing; everything was throbbing. His brain, his heart, his blood. Panic in its purest form. Violent, sickening panic. Everything was dark and distant now.

Zack brought his shaking hands towards his hair and clasped them into his scalp. He lowered his head until his elbows were touching his knees, exhaling through his nose. The old couch creaked when he shifted his restless legs.

It was four in the morning, twenty hours since anyone had seen Cloud. Zack had just returned from his third attempt at finding the boy, driving all over the city, searching every place he could think Cloud would be, and then every place he knew Cloud would never be. He had found nothing, no clues, no signs, no...Cloud.

No Cloud.

He wanted to see Cloud. Gaia, he wanted to see him. Zack felt a lump form in his throat and swallowed heavily, struggling to calm his racing mind.

Just breathe.

He inhaled until it hurt, trying to control pace of his rising chest. He felt sick; so many thoughts were running through his mind.

Where was Cloud? Where was he? Something had to have happened; there was no way Cloud would have done this on purpose. Run away? There was no way. Cloud cared too much about everyone to do something like that. Even though the last few months had been though on the teen, he would never leave his mom. He would never leave _him_.

_Would he?_

Then, where was he? He didn't want to think about it but things like this weren't unusual in Midgar; the authorities were just as corrupt as the low-life's on the street and no one, of any age was truly safe. Every single day the news was filled with horror stories of murders, kidnappings, rapists, psychopaths. The entire city was a tribute to how dark humanity could be.

"Fuck." Zack whispered, feeling his eyes sting. Cloud wasn't one of them. Cloud wasn't a body on the road, a 'missing' poster left to rot long after hope was forgotten.

Cloud wasn't gone.

"Zack." His purple eyes opened and he straightened up, turning his head to meet a pair of faded eyes. Sky's hunched form stood by the window, her pale hand clutched towards her chest. She looked like a ghost; her skin was impossibly whiter than he'd ever seen it, her hair, which was usually kept in a neat bun, was flowing loose over her shoulders, reaching to the end of her back. She was shaking, her eyes wide and glazed and watery.

He felt his heart break then.

"He's here." She spoke, looking back towards the window. Zack cringed at the words, wishing they were referring to something else; someone else.

He sniffed heavily, not bothering to force a smile. "Okay."

There was a knock on the door a few minutes later and Zack opened it, coming face to face with the one person he could trust to help them.

Angeal looked down at the wide eyes of his nephew, startled by the youth within them. He felt like he was back in time; Zack looked at him like child he once was, awed and trusting in his strength.

"Hey." Zack muttered glumly, moving aside to let him in. Angeal stepped into the apartment, walking over to Sky and putting a hand on her shoulder. She closed her eyes, letting some tears fall down her cheek. Angeal looked over to Zack.

"Something's wrong Angeal." He whispered, hating the sound of his words. "This isn't right."

"You last saw him this morning?" The SOLDIER spoke softly to Sky.

"Yes. He took his breakfast and left at eight. Shiva, I don't know where he could be. I can't..."

She stopped talking, rubbing her hand against her heart. Zack grimaced.

"And he didn't seem strange the night before?"

"He seemed...fine." The dark-haired boy answered softly.

"You haven't contacted the _authorities_?" There was something slightly scornful in the way Angeal said the last word. Zack scoffed.

"They said call back tomorrow morning. Fucking crap! Anythin-"He shut his mouth, nostrils flaring with anger. Sky put her hand up towards his forehead.

Angeal nodded. "Well then, Zack, you stay here with Sky, I'm going to go out and see what I can find out." Zack's eyes widened his mouth opening in anger.

"I want to go with you. I'd-" Angeal raised his hand, silencing him.

"No, you too need to stay here in case something happens. I won't be long." He gave Zack a stern look before turning to look at Sky.

"You need to sit down, rest a bit." Sky shook her head and laughed bitterly.

"Rest? What else have I been doing but resting for half my life. I've rested so much that the one thing worth being awake for is gone. I won't rest again until he's back." Zack was shocked; he had never heard the woman speak in anything but a pleasant tone. He looked to Angeal who, to his surprise, seemed unaffected.

"I understand." The tall man looked at Zack before turning and exiting the apartment.

Zack stared after him for a moment before turning to Sky. The blond woman wiped at her face and gave him a soft smile, walking towards the couch. "Sit with me Zack." She whispered.

Zack did, because at that moment she was the only person in the world he could stand to be with. She was just as miserable as he, and misery loves company.

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The sound of wood scraping off stone jolted Cloud out of his sleep-like trance. His eyes widened and sickness began accumulating in his abdominal area at a fast pace. He shifted his legs, ignoring the cramping of his stiff muscles, and sat up straight, trying to swallow the lump forming in his throat.

The strong footsteps making their way towards him were like metallic bells, ringing in his fate.

This was it; whatever was going to happen was going to happen now. The thought was so terrifying that Cloud felt a hot sensation spread up his back and behind his ears, sweat began to form under his hairline and he could feel his palms become moist as they clasped together in front of his legs. He shook his head, trying to tell himself to calm down. It didn't work.

Was this the end? Would he be killed now? He didn't want to die. He had never realised before how much he wanted to live, how valuable his life was. Why did it take death to make one appreciate life? It didn't matter. He was going to die now and there was nothing he could do about it. He would try to fight but it would do no good. He was weak and Sephiroth was the most powerful man in the world.

Maybe he wouldn't die. This was General Sephiroth. Not a psychopath or a murderer. He was a hero. He wouldn't kill him. He had him here for a different reason, Cloud was just over reacting.

He was going to die.

The shaking blond didn't look up when his form was shadowed by the fully leather-clad man in front of him.

Sephiroth smirked, loving how small and terrified the beauty below him looked. Poor Cloud, what was he expecting to happen? He was sure his naive mind was filled with horror stories and worst case scenarios. That was good, fear was good. It suited Cloud.

The boy didn't look up at him so he decided to crouch down to his level, pressing one knee into the white carpet and leaning his hand loosely on the other. Cloud kept his head down, something he found endearing.

"Cloud?" He said with a smile, his lip twitched upwards when the boy took a breath but didn't answer. "Do you not want to talk to me? I'm sure you have some questions." He kept his tone soft, almost like he was talking to an infant; not that he had ever done that.

Cloud felt his stomach coil. He did have questions, so many questions, but he wasn't sure if he would be able to ask them, or to handle the answers. He took another breath and brought his face up; ignoring the fact that gravity itself was opposing the action.

"Why am I here?" His voice sounded pathetic, humiliatingly so. He shivered when those legendary cat-like eyes met his. They were unreal, like the eyes of the Demons he had seen so often in films. But at the same time, they weren't like that at all. They were so much more...real. Beautiful and horrible, cold and smouldering. They were mesmerising and he felt himself become paralysed. He couldn't breathe.

Sephiroth kept his expression soft, as much as he could, and stared into the stunned blue orbs he had seen so often in his dreams. His chest felt like it was going to burst with merriment.

"Why don't we move to the bed? It would be far more comfortable." Clouds eyes widened and he opened his mouth to reject the idea but was cut off by the deep chuckle Sephiroth let out at his reaction. "I don't intend to do anything but talk Cloud, we can't have a conversation with me crouched over like this. You must feel stiff; you've been sitting there for hours."

"I'm fine here." Cloud said softly, moving his gaze to the side. He squirmed when Sephiroth kept staring at him. The General then let out a light sigh and stood up.

"Then perhaps another few hours by yourself will make you more...eager for some answers." He turned briskly, making his way back towards the stairs.

Cloud was torn. A part of him wanted nothing more than to be left alone, away from this strange man, but...he couldn't be left to think for another few hours, that would drive him crazy. He needed to know what would happen to him, it had to be better than thinking about it.

"Wait." He said, not loudly. "I-I want to...talk." He pressed his hand against the wall and pulled his aching body to its feet. A wave of dizziness overcame him but he shook it off and focused on the broad back of the other man. All of that silver hair covering it.

Sephiroth kept his smirk hidden from Cloud. That was risky, he chided himself, but Cloud had to learn that things would take place on his ground from now on. Cloud was his, not the other way around. He softened his expression and turned, pleased to see that the blond was standing awkwardly and waiting for his next move.

"Very well." He conceded, walking past the boy, who backed away from him in fright, and taking a seat on the end of the bed. Cloud turned and looked at him with wary eyes, his hands hanging awkwardly at his sides.

"Sit." He ushered, indicating towards the place beside him.

Cloud looked behind him; the door was open, Sephiroth probably saw no reason to close it. Why would he? The blond would never get up and out fast enough. Not with this SOLDIER preventing him. He sighed in dejection and slowly, carefully walked towards the bed, keeping his eyes on the man. He felt self-conscious, and hyper aware of his movements. Every step he took pounded into his brain and he desperately wanted to turn and run.

He sat at the top of the bed, as far away from the man as he could be while still following his orders. He moved his hair out of his face and looked towards Sephiroth. The man was staring at him, really staring. A shiver ran up his spine.

"I take it you're wondering just why your here." Sephiroth spoke after a moment of silence, his monotone voice echoing in Clouds ears. The teen nodded timidly, preparing himself for the answer.

Sephiroth tsked, looking towards the ceiling. How could he go about putting this into words? He had never shared his feelings or thoughts about Cloud with anyone, obviously, and now that he had to it seemed as though his language was not accommodating enough. How could he tell the boy that for months now he had stalked him he, he had lied to him, he had toyed with him, he had killed for him... he fallen in love with him.

"I brought you here." Cloud didn't like that answer. Was he being played with? That wasn't fair; he couldn't take mind games now.

"I know that." He said, trying not to sound crotchety-best keep everyone's tempers cool-. "Why?"

Sephiroth tilted his head to the side, trying to catch the boy's jittery. "I intend to keep you here." Ah, Cloud looked up at him then, with big sad eyes. Beautiful.

"Why?" Cloud felt his throat tighten. He didn't understand how the other could say something like that without shame or consideration for its emanations. He was so confused; he didn't understand. Breathing heavily, he looked at the other imploringly.

"I've been watching you Cloud." Cloud couldn't explain just how scary those words sounded; he let out in involuntary gasp and moved further back. Sephiroth gave him another eerie smile. "Don't be frightened. I don't mean to scare you Cloud but you wanted answers so I'll give them to you."

"W-watching me? What does that mean?" Cloud questioned, trying to control the hoarseness of his voice. His throat hurt.

"It means that for the past few months a large quantity of my time has been dedicated to observing you. Stalking you, as one would say." Sephiroth was about to say more but Cloud stood up suddenly, shaking his head and looking like he was approaching the first stage of hysteria.

Cloud felt sick. He felt sick, he felt scare and he felt confused. What was this ... Psycho saying? He couldn't be hearing him correctly. He felt sick.

"I don't understand." He felt himself become dizzy. He was so confused. What was happening? This wasn't real, things like this didn't happen.

No something like this had happened. Clarence… what?

"I understand you're confused. This must be a lot to take in but you wanted to know the truth. And it's better to get the past out in the open so we can move on with our future."

Cloud's mind was whirring '_Our future',_ what on Gaia did that mean? Was he missing something? He didn't understand. He was scared. He took another step back, fiddling his fingers in front of him and staring at the man warily.

"What are you talking about?" He asked, looking at the other with increasingly hysterical eyes. Sephiroth noticed but remained seated.

"If you will just sit and listen I'll-" but he didn't get to finish because with impressive speed for a human, Cloud turned and bolted towards the stairs.

Cloud wasn't thinking, every fibre of his being was dedicated to getting as far away from that man as possible. That man was insane if he thought he was just going to sit there and listen to him talk about such ridiculous things. His eyes were blurry with panic, but he felt adrenaline pulse through his veins as he reached the stairs. He just needed to get out. He had to get away from this man. He wasn't sane. No sane person could say such things. He needed to get out and get help.

He didn't even feel the hands around his waist as he reached the third step, not until he felt the wind get knocked out of him as he was hauled backwards. Panic controlled his actions and he began struggling frantically, kicking and shouting for all he was worth.

"No." It was like he was being restrained by iron; he couldn't get those damn arms to even budge and the further he was dragged back the more incensed he became. Sephiroth kept his arms pinned to his side and dragged him backwards "Stop. Stop. Let… me go. Gaia…. Let go. Help. Help me." He repeated over and over again, digging his feet into the carpet. Sephiroth said nothing, just continued pulling him, moving one of his arms to circle his neck, making him gag.

"HELP." Cloud felt suffocated, he couldn't breathe. His heartbeat was ringing in his ears. "Please, let me go." He shouted, tears beginning to sting his eyes as he whimpered and grunted, trying to free his body. "Stop. Please, I can't breathe." He moved one of his arms under Sephiroth's, trying uselessly to push it away. He couldn't stand the man's touch. It was overpowering. He couldn't believe this was happening.

The adrenaline faded from his body and gave way to fear as he was finally forced onto the bed face first, Sephiroth's impossibly heavy personage falling on top of him. His struggles turned into soft squirming as he pressed his face into the quilt. "Please." He whispered over and over again. "Please let me go." He couldn't think; the situation was too bad. Being pinned on a bed by a man twice his size, ten times his strength. He couldn't breathe.

"Shhhhh." Sephiroth whispered, bringing up the hand that was pinned beneath Cloud's waist and moving some hair behind the teens left ear. He placed his mouth close to it and felt the boy shudder and shake uncontrollably.

He was aroused.

"Shhhh. Stop, stop that." He moved his hips so they were pinning the squirming boy more securely.

Cloud couldn't move. He felt claustrophobic. This man was too strong. He was too big. Every inch of his body was restrained with such little effort and it terrified him. He was so helpless. He shouted, feeling the others breath on the side of his face.

"I know that you're afraid, Cloud. I don't blame you, but the sooner you get used to the truth the better. You won't be leaving here. Escape is impossible; I've made sure of that. Hush, I'm not going to harm you." Sephiroth was almost touching the boy's face as he whispered intimately. Cloud continued shouting and kicking; trying to move his head away but the hand in his hair prevented it.

Sephiroth was in ecstasy. Every movement the boy made rubbed against his groin, stimulating him to the point of madness. He buried his face in Clouds hair, trying to be subtle and holding in a groan. Cloud was perfect, and Cloud was his. He allowed himself one more inhale and then, achingly, moved away.

"I don't want to stay here." The blond whispered, his words slightly muffled by the quilt. He felt Sephiroth sigh, the hand beneath his neck sliding out from underneath him and move somewhere he didn't know.

"I'm unfortunately aware of that." The General said. Cloud could hear leather shuffling behind him but ignored it, focusing on what was being said. "Nothing would please me more than your co-operation Cloud but I know that that will take a while." Cloud lifted his face up, breathing heavily.

"Co-operate with wha- I won't co-operate." Sephiroth pushed his head back down, hissing lowly.

"You will learn to do as I say." The hand was then removed from his hair but he kept his face in the blankets, breathing heavily.

Sephiroth sat up, still pinning the boy's legs with his own. He pulled out something from beneath his coat and when Cloud identified them as leather straps he began to struggle again. Sephiroth quickly caught one of his arms. The teen tried to pull it away, hissing and squirming, but the man put one of the straps in his own mouth and put the other around the boy's slim wrist, letting it go once it was secured with a buckle, similar to what would be on a belt. He could feel Cloud begin to fight more and made quick work of the other wrist, letting it go once the strap was in place.

"W-what are you d-doing?" Cloud asked in horror as he brought his wrists up to study them. His heart was beating so fast he could barely breath. The straps had pieces hanging off them with more buckles, indicating they could be attached to something.

Sephiroth gave him no time to act as he quickly lifted himself up and forced the teen onto his back, ignoring the way he struggled and yelled out desperately beneath him. It was sad, the way Cloud tried to hide his hands behind his back. Did he really think he could stop Sephiroth from doing something he wanted?

"I'm not going to harm you Cloud, but I can't leave you free now, not when you're so upset. Just calm yourself." He felt like rolling his eyes when Cloud attempted to kick his leg and when that failed, tried to plead with him.

"Please. Don't do this. Just let me go. I don't know what you want." Sephiroth grabbed the pleading teen's right hand and forcefully pulled it towards the headboard. Cloud fought the whole time, trying to kick at him and pulling at his arm with his free hand.

"You can't do this." He yelled, trying desperately to get him to see sense. Sephiroth didn't respond. Just fastened the strap to the rail and then went to grab Clouds other hand. It really was a shame he had to bind him, but he wasn't comfortable with leaving the hysterical teen free to hurt himself or damage anything. He had known that Cloud would react this way, and so he was prepared.

Cloud tried to hide his remaining hand behind his back, determined to keep it away from Sephiroth. He couldn't understand what was happening. How could someone do this to him, any of this? Why was this happening? He was scared, he was terrified, and he wanted to go...No, he couldn't think of that now. He just couldn't let Sephiroth grab his other hand or he would be completely vulnerable to whatever this man intended to do.

Sephiroth growled and pulled his wrist, earning himself a shriek from the boy. "STOP." Cloud shouted, moving his head back to watch him tie his hand. "Please don't do this. I-I'll listen to you… Please." But it was no use, with a final snap both his hands were restrained to the headboard. It was over. He was going to die. He was going to be tortured and killed. Would it be slow? Yes, why else would he be tied? He was so scared. He had never felt so vulnerable in his life, laid out like a meal to be consumed. He was going to die.

Sephiroth pushed his hair back from his view as he sat on his heels, looking down at the now heavily breathing teenager. Cloud looked gorgeous. He had seen him upset so often before, and always thought it was attractive, but now that he was so close it was so much more...real. Even with his face flushed and his eyes pale and wide he was so beautiful. His boy was so vulnerable, he could do anything he wanted, for as long as he wanted, and there was nothing anyone could do to stop him.

"Please don't kill me." Cloud caught his eye as he spoke, swallowing as he tried to keep from shaking.

Sephiroth frowned. Cloud was a beautiful creature yes, but he was also a child. A scared, confused child. He couldn't let his lust control him; he had to have some empathy. Even if he would enjoy the boys fear, he also wanted to take care of him. It was not his intention to terrify him to the point where he became nothing but a mindless, glass-eyes doll. They both had some learning to do.

He reached out a hand and wiped at Clouds cheeks with his palm, rubbing away the sweat accumulating along his temple. "Cloud?" He whispered, bending down closer, his hair falling around them like a waterfall. The blond turned his face to the side, refusing to look at him. He ran his eyes over the boy's attractive features and stroked his hair, noticing how Clouds breath hitched. The slight body beneath him was as tense as a rock.

"I do not intend to end your life." Cloud shook his head, swallowing loudly.

"Then what do you want?" He whispered, frustration leaking into his voice. Sephiroth clicked his tongue.

"You're tired Cloud. You need to sleep."

"You can't do this to someone. What are you doing? I'm tied up, ho- how can I sleep when you're saying these things to me? What do you mean you were watching me? We… we don't even know… each other." He turned to his captor, eyes wide in exasperation. Sephiroth smiled at him, moving his hand from his hair to his cheekbone and walking two fingers along it.

"That's where you're wrong Cloud." Cloud jerked his head away from the intrusive fingers, narrowing his eyes.

"Don't touch m-"

"Shhhh." Sephiroth cooed, trying to hide the fact that his temper was again raising at the boys disrespectful words. Cloud would have to learn to hold his tongue. "Don't get worked up Cloud. You need some rest."

"Please, I don't want to be here. I feel sick." But Sephiroth just sighed and got off of the bed. Cloud was glad for that, he couldn't handle him so close, touching him, but he didn't want to be left like that, tied down like a criminal or animal. It was the most terrible feeling in the world, to just have your free will take like that. "Please?" He whispered. His eyes filling with water as he looked up at the man, all the terror and sadness he felt evident on his face.

Sephiroth felt his groin twitch at the look. Gaia, he was gorgeous. So fucking gorgeous. He wanted him so much. He cleared his throat and reached for the blanket that had been kicked to the end of the bed in their scuffle.

"I'm sorry but I cannot comply. I've put a lot of effort into getting you here with me and petty pleading and snivelling is not going to change my mind." Was that too harsh? Sephiroth brushed it off and pulled the blanket up to the boy's neck, tucking it in to the sides of the mattress so it wouldn't be kicked off easily. He smirked when he saw Clouds legs do just that.

"Why are you doing this? I don't understand." Cloud began pulling his hands, trying to free them. Sephiroth knew it was futile, those were the restraints Shinra used when interrogating criminals. They wouldn't break. He brought his hand out and, to the boy's terror, placed it on his sweaty forehead, holding Clouds head straight.

"I'll return once you are rested. Don't worry Cloud. Everything's fine, I'll take care of you." He looked at the boys desperate face once more then removed his hand slowly, turning and walking away.

"You can't... don't do this..." Cloud said softly, closing his eyes inhaling loudly. He listened as Sephiroth's footsteps got further away until they were out of the room. The door to his new prison was shut and he was left alone.

All alone.


	15. XV

**For those who didn't read the revised edition of chapter 12, I just want to inform you that the Cloud and Zack kiss never happened. **

**Enjoy the chapter. I'm so happy to be writing this again.**

**This chapter may contain NCS activity, abuse, upsetting and dark themes.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

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Tifa dropped her shoulders, contemplating her reflection warily. She looked terrible. No amount of makeup could cover the fact that she had spent the last two days crying. Her skin was pasty and her eyes were red with dark bags beneath them. She wasn't a girl that cared too much about her appearance, contrary to what people believed, but she didn't want to go out looking like a meteor-dust addict either.

Sniffing, she picked up her concealer and applied it generously beneath her eyes. She also put on foundation and blush but forwent any eye makeup; her eyes were too sore, plus she would probably spend the day trying to avoid black streaks running down her face.

"Tifa, come have some breakfast." Denzel knocked on her door before running noisily down the stairs. She inhaled, pulling her fingers through her high ponytail; it was too greasy to leave down that day.

She grabbed her bag from beside the bed and headed out of her room, walking slowly down the swirling stairs and through the shiny hall, stopping at her kitchen door. Denzel and her mother were sitting at the table, going through their morning routine.

"Oh Hun, you look terrible. Couldn't you have found something more… flattering?" Her mother frowned at the loose jeans and T-shirt adorning her daughter, her painted lips squeezing together. Tifa ignored her, looking out the window. Her mother tutted, running her manicured nails through her styled bangs. "You've gotta get over that boy hun, what was he worth anyway? You need a man who'll take care of you, like I did with your father."

"Okay mom." Tifa answered absently, making a face at Denzel causing him to giggle. Her mother gave her a look before turning back to her magazine.

"Jade prepared you some breakfast." She pointed a red tipped finger towards the plate beside Denzel. Tifa looked at the food dispassionately, pursing her lips.

"No, I'm just going to head to school now." She waved goodbye to Denzel and was just turning when her mother called after her.

"Breakfast is the only meal I don't recommend skipping; that's a quick way to gain weight. You should watch that Tifa. With your height you'll pile it on easily."

"Okay mom."

She left the house and got in to her black Porsche. Once the door was closed the brunette leaned her head against the steering wheel, exhaling heavily. Tears started to spill from her eyes, although she didn't sob. She let them fall for a few minutes before sitting up, wiping her face and starting the car.

She reached the school in fifteen minutes and parked in the furthest space from the entrance. Checking her reflection to make sure no evidence of her tears was left on her face, Tifa sighed and closed her eyes; scolding her weakness.

She was not that girl.

She rubbed her forehead and opened the car door, stepping out into the sun. It was a warm day, making her glad she didn't opt for the polo-neck she was going to wear. Pulling her bag out, the girl made her way towards the building, ignoring the looks she was receiving from some of the more erotically charged members of the school. She was almost at the top step when she heard her name being called. Closing her eyes, the brunette forced a smile on her face and turned to meet the concerned eyes of Yuna.

"Hey Tif." Yuna said, catching up to her.

"Hi." She replied. Yuna looked at her sadly.

"I heard about you and Zack. I was going to call over but you weren't in school yesterday so I didn't want to intrude." A part of Tifa felt annoyed at the girl for bringing the subject up but she just smiled and nodded.

"I just needed some time to myself. Was he, uh, here?" Gaia, she seemed pathetic to be asking that.

"Yeah he was..." Tifa nodded again.

"How did he seem?" Yeah; really pathetic. Yuna clicked her tongue. The other girl looked a bit tired herself, she noticed. Paler than normal.

"He was really quiet actually; he looked like he was distracted or something." Tifa felt a sort of contentment at that. She had hoped that the break-up would affect Zack in some way; that he wouldn't just go back to being the way he was once he escaped from her.

She felt worthless. Someone to be escaped from?

"Oh, well we should head to class."

Reno, Leon and Axel were already in the classroom once they arrived so they sat with them. She was relieved to see that Zack wasn't there yet.

"Hey." She said to the three, trying not to frown when they all looked uncomfortable. Let the pity party commence.

"Hi Tif. Glad to see ya back." Reno said, leaning back in his chair.

"Thanks Reno."

"So," the redhead started. She narrowed her eyes, knowing what the look on his face meant.

"Yes?" She answered with a raised brow.

"I hear yer single again."

"Reno!" Yuna hissed while the others groaned. Tifa just chuckled; glad the subject was being addressed early.

"You're retarded." Axel muttered, flicking his pencil at his cousin's head.

"Jeeze Axel. Just because yer screwing that boy doesn't mean everyone is satisfied." Reno grumbled, rubbing his head and scowling at Axel who suddenly went very stiff. Tifa looked at him in askance.

"What boy?" She tilted her head.

"Yes," she heard Leon say lowly, "What boy Axel?" Axel eyes rounded as the brunet regarded him.

"Uh, you wouldn't know him." Reno snickered as Axel looked uncomfortable. Tifa was about to comment when she heard a new voice enter the room. She turned around; expecting Yuffies usual excited face but was surprised when the girl ran into the room, white as a ghost and looking like someone had burnt her candy stash.

"Yuf?" She heard Yuna ask before she could.

"What's wrong?"

Tifa was shocked when she saw the genuine tears in her friend's eyes red eyes. Yuffie opened her mouth, bottom lip shaking.

"Cloud's missing."

She felt her heat skip.

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The mattress squeaked as his body fell back against it, the leather now smouldering against his wrists. He closed his mouth, swallowing the salty taste from the lack of hydration. His throat burned, his arms burned, everything was too hot. The room was too hot. He had kicked the blanket off himself a while ago but it did little to help the burning all over his skin. He could feel the sweat soaking his clothes and the bed; he could see it drenching his chest as it heaved. He mouth formed an 'o' and he began breathing steadily, reminiscent of a woman in labour.

Cloud was in hell.

The heat, the pain, the thirst, the never ending, mind numbing fear. It was hell. He couldn't believe this was happening to him. He was becoming delirious, he couldn't comprehend anything now. Was he really here? Tied to a bed? Being kept prisoner by the General of the Shinra army?

It was…ridiculous. So positively ludicrous that it just had to be a dream.

Cloud screamed hoarsely into the air, arching his body completely off the roasting mattress. He let himself fall back a few minutes later, feeling like he was going to be sick.

"I've been watching you."

Gaia, what did that mean? Did he really say that? No, there was no way Sephiroth had said that? Cloud let out a hysterical half groan half laugh. How did he think Sephiroth had said that? That was Clarence…Clarence had stalked him, not Sephiroth. He was mixing everything up in his head from the stress of it all. He wanted to press a hand to his forehead, thinking that perhaps he was sick…

But he hadn't imagined it though, the proof was the marks on his body where the man had restrained him, and the pain in his wrists beneath the leather. Sephiroth had really said and done all of this.

Cloud shook his head, jerking his hands sharply. He heard him. He said that he had been watching him, stalking him. Cloud felt his skin prickle at the thought. What did that mean? How and when had the man been watching him? Surly he would have known if he was being watched.

Well, he didn't when Clarence had stalked him but that was…different. Two people could not have been stalking him at the same time, especially if one of them was the General of the Shinra army. Wouldn't that be a bit noticeable? It's not like he could just walk around the streets following him without being noticed.

He head throbbed; none of this made sense.

He decided that thinking about it wasn't doing him any good; it was tantamount to panic really. So he just stopped squirming and relaxed his body, the verb relax being used to its minimum.

Twisting his left hand in order to ease the cramp in his elbow, the blond looked around the large room. It was so pristine, everything was spotlessly clean. The paint on the walls was glossy and fresh looking and the ceiling was blindingly white, even the bedspreads felt unused and there was a certain smell of paint and new wood, like the time he and Zack helped an old woman from his building fix up her apartment when he was younger.

Zack.

Shaking the boy's name out of his mind, he clenched his teeth and looked around the room again. Yes, it was definitely newly done. Why though? If Sephiroth was a serial killer or something of the sort, then why wasn't the room dark and dirty with things like metal tables and bloody instruments? This room seemed too normal, perfect even.

Well, it wasn't perfect. Even if it was about five times larger, cleaner, newer and more expensively decorated than his old room, there was still something about it that seemed wrong. There was no natural light because there was no window and it made everything seem dull and artificial. Everything was so clean and unused and large; it had no personality.

He wanted his old room. He missed his golden walls, he didn't care if they weren't flawless and shiny like the ones he was surrounded by now, and he didn't care if his bed wasn't as large or well made. He liked his old room; he had turned the little space into one of the only places he could feel at home on the planet. He had spent so many hours making the wall hangers, and mirages and dream catchers to decorate it, collecting strange little materials to use. Over the years the walls had been decorated with odd little things like bottle caps and food packaging. He even had a catcher made out of used Down-Feathers.

He closed his mouth tightly. He had to stop thinking. Thinking would hurt him now. He just had to concentrate on the situation and find a way to deal with it.

He felt a lump form in his throat. He couldn't deal with this. It was too much. How was he here? There was no way this could really be happening to him. He really didn't want to die. He couldn't believe his life was going to end like this. No matter what Sephiroth said, his actions were louder. He was going to kill him and whatever happened beforehand was just a terrifying prelude.

Hours and hours passed but Cloud's mind continued to wander through the depths of his terror, until eventually his body gave up and he fell into an unsettled sleep. The marks around his wrists turning a deep crimson as the night moved on.

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"Okay, I'll be there in a bit." Zack muttered and snapped his phone closed. Sky looked at him questioningly, the morning light enhancing her sickly appearance. Her shoulders fell when he looked at her glumly.

"The, uh, police are starting to look for him now." He couldn't believe he was saying those words. Everything was spiralling beyond his contemplation. One minute he was waiting for Cloud to enter the library, the next he was preparing to meet the police and help them search for the boy. Gaia, he felt like he was going to be sick. His head was fuzzy and everything seemed ultra-bright; dirty. It was like anything that was good had drained out of the planet, leaving only science and motion in its wake.

"Shiva." Sky cupped her hands in front of her mouth, shaking her head. Zack swallowed and nodded, walking over to get his jacket.

"I'm going to meet Angeal down at the cross and we're going to look around for..." What was he looking for? Clues? Evidence?

A body?

"Fuck." He hissed, kicking the couch. Sky took in a startled breath and he didn't even care enough to feel bad. He whispered a soft 'sorry' before rubbing his head.

"I'll call you if we find anything okay. You should... yeah." He gave a small salute as he walked towards the door. He knew it was selfish but he was glad to be getting out of there. He felt useless just sitting around and the woman's worries were only making him feel worse. It soothed his nerves to be out trying to find the boy and it gave him something to concentrate on.

He decided to walk towards the meeting point, figuring it wouldn't hurt to keep his eyes open on the way. He walked down the road he had often taken with the boy before, in his pre-bike years. It was odd to see how something as insignificant as a pathway was capable of tearing him apart at that moment.

He cleared his throat and looked forward, but his chest tightened painfully as he spotted the small wall ahead. The low wall Cloud had always insisted on walking on when he was younger.

_"Ohhh, Cloud, you're kind of ruining my image here. That stops being cool after you turn two." Zack teased, walking alongside the blonde, keeping his hand out in case he fell off the narrow wall._

_"I can't __**not**__ do it. Seriously, it's like a compulsion disorder. If I don't do it I'll think about it all day." Cloud laughed, keeping his hands out to balance himself._

_"Gaia, you're really a weirdo." Zack mumbled, smiling at two girls who passed and giggled at them. "See, even the chickies think you look funny."_

_"I think they were laughing at you're new hairstyle." Cloud answered with a smug look. Zack scoffed, tugging at his sprouting ponytail with narrowed eyes._

_"I look gooood." He muttered. "You're just jealous because you've a chocobo's ass on your head."_

_The blond just jumped down off the end of the wall and held his hands up in a 'whatever you say' manner._

"Fuck." He hissed, clenching his lids shut and grinding his teeth, like he was in actual physical pain. This was worse than anything physical though. Much worse.

He resumed walking again, scanning the area for anything that could give him a clue as to where Cloud was.

He looked up ahead and took a breath when he spotted Angeal standing amongst a group of green and silver clad police men.

'This is really happening' is all that kept running through his mind as he walked towards them.

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Sephiroth steadied the bowl and its contents between his right arm and hip bone as he used his other hand to pull the bulky door open. He entered the room discreetly and walked down the stairs with an inhuman silence any Turk would envy. Once at the bottom, he let his eyes focus on the small form sleeping on the bed. He smiled.

It really was a shame to have to tie Cloud up, but he was glad that it had eventually forced the boy into a sleep which wouldn't have been achieved if the boy were free to panic and lash out.

The air in the room was hot, he noticed as he made his way over to the bed. Making a mental note to adjust the thermostat on the way out, he moved the basin in front of him and once he reached the bed he placed it on the locker, taking out the two bottles and letting them stand beside it.

He sighed, feeling his body instantly react to the sight of the teen. Cloud was truly a beautiful boy. Sephiroth had honestly never seen anyone like him in his lifetime; none of the celebrity or models he had met or slept with could even stand beside him without covering their faces in shame. And it wasn't just because of his looks; there was something surrounding this teen. An aura. It was the reason people were drawn to him. Sephiroth had watched on as the sheer beauty and innocence the boy unwittingly possessed drove everyone to stare at him for that moment longer, to smile when they talked to him and to show that little extra interest in what he had to say.

It really was miraculous that Cloud still possessed his virtue in the wake of such eagerness.

He chuckled, leaning down more towards the boy's face and bringing a hand forward to boldly rub the flushed cheek. He saw the sweat stain his leather fingertips and frowned. The room was too hot.

He pushed back his hair as he kneeled down fully and decided it was time to wake the teen, although he probably should have left him sleep.

He had waited for Cloud to acknowledge him long enough.

"Cloud." He whispered, patting the boy's temple with his gloved hand. "Cloud, wake up." Cloud groaned; twitching his eye as Sephiroth's fingers drew near it. The silver-haired man smiled, clearing his throat. "Come on Cloud. Just wake for me." It took a few more minutes of encouraging words but eventually the boy's eyes fluttered open. He sat back and watched as the blond gathered his bearings.

Cloud's groggy mind had trouble focusing. His eyes were blurry but he didn't understand why, when he tried to rub them, a sharp pain in his wrists stopped him. He creased his brow, breathing slowly. When he did open his eyes he was confused by the colour surrounding him.

Blue

Blue room

Sephiroth

He was being kept prisoner in a Blue room by Sephiroth.

He tugged his hands in their bindings, not caring that it burned like Ifrit's fire, and let out small, sharp sounds from his throat as everything rushed back to his mind.

Sephiroth watched his ward, fascinated by the way his face went from relaxed to confuse and then contorting dramatically as panic set in. Cloud jerked his hands particularly hard and he frowned when he sighted the red marks on the exposed skin. He grasped the teens shoulder.

"Stop that."

Cloud felt his blood freeze at the sight of the demonically man. Sephiroth, General Sephiroth, was touching him, staring at him. He wasn't the person he appeared to be. He had done this to him. He had kidnapped him and tied him up. He wanted to hurt him.

Sephiroth was his captor.

"Please." Cloud whispered but Sephiroth raised a hand to his own lips, much like a teacher would do to a petulant child.

Teacher.

School.

Home.

Cloud swallowed thickly, feeling his throat burn.

"I don't want to hear any begging now Cloud. It's a waste of time for both of us." He felt hope easing out of his body at the others smooth words. How could he say such a thing so easily? Cloud pursed his lips, involuntary following the command.

Sephiroth smiled; glad to have gotten the boys distraught attention. Cloud was looking at him, focusing on him. Out of all the things there were on the planet and beyond, Cloud was looking at him. Sephiroth was the core of his world now, and Cloud was his.

"Excellent." He said, watching the boy's face become pinched in anger. "Now, we started a conversation last night. Do you remember?" Cloud swallowed and nodded.

"Of course I remember."

Sephiroth clicked his tongue, placing one of his hands on the edge of the mattress, making Cloud go stiff as it was quite near to his ribs.

"I was not lying in what I said. I have been watching you for some time now Cloud." Sephiroth paused when Cloud shook his head and looked towards the top wall.

"Why are you saying this?" He whispered in exasperation, clenching and unclenching his fingers.

"Do you not want the truth?" Sephiroth tilted his head to the left, his silver tendrils falling over his shoulder.

"I _want _you to let me go." The teen tugged hard on his hands, gritting his teeth. Sephiroth chuckled.

"That's not going to happen."

"Wh-"

"Silence."

Cloud felt his insides twist at the cold expression on his captors face. He stared at the other, waiting for him to say horrible and creepy things that would terrify him. And when he was done talking, he would kill him in the most horrible way.

"I want you to know that I do not intend to harm you." The silver-haired man ignored Clouds disbelieving exhale. "And I am sorry that my actions and words have, and more than likely will, unsettle you."

"Why…were you watching me?" Clouds voice was hoarse and hesitant. Sephiroth reached out to touch his bicep.

"I was interested in you."

Cloud visibly clenched his stomach in order to remain calm. He couldn't over react, one motion would tip him over the edge to paroxysm and he couldn't let that happen. He swallowed the sickness he felt and opened his mouth. "Why are you saying that?"

Sephiroth smiled, "Because it's true, Cloud."

Cloud waited for him to continue but then realised that he was expected to ask something else. He moved his shoulders to ease the tension and searched his mind for the right question to ask.

"H-how long have you been…watching?" He didn't want to know. He didn't want to know. He just wanted to leave this place. He couldn't stay here. He felt like crying when a happy expression rose onto Sephiroth's face. He looked like he was pleased with Cloud for asking the correct question, it made the blond nervous.

"Well do you remember that day? Several months ago, when I entered that store you used to work at?" Sephiroth waited for Cloud to nod, pleased when he did so quickly, then continued. "Yes I realised that night, the moment I met you, how special you are Cloud Strife." Sephiroth paused, relishing in Clouds reaction.

Cloud felt pressure between his eyes and knew he wouldn't be able to hold back his tears soon. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. That was so long… all those months ago, he remembered when Sephiroth came into the shop. It was a big moment for him, meeting his childhood hero, but he never in his wildest dreams considered that he had made any impression on the man besides a nameless worker. He wouldn't believe it.

"I don't...What do you mean?"

Sephiroth leaned closer to the boy, causing him to edge away shakily which in turn caused the man to smirk.

"Just what it sounds like. I took an interest in you that night and I began watching you since then, making sure you were safe." Oh, Clouds eyes were so gorgeous when they filled with fear. He wanted them. They belonged to him.

"Safe?" Cloud asked, beginning to breathe heavily. He felt like his heart was trying to break out of his chest. His stomach hurt.

"Yes," Sephiroth said in what came out as a hiss, he moved his hand to Clouds arm, just leaving it there. Clouds terror multiplied tenfold at the action and he tried unsuccessfully to jerk the bound limb.

"I used my connections at Shinra to find the information I needed about you. I learned where you lived, where you went to school, anything I could. Then I went to your home and to your school and I watched you." Sephiroth's eyes widened, they were glazed, as though he was placing himself back in that time.

Cloud just kept shaking his head, swallowing and pulling at his hands. This man, he wasn't sane. He was mad, completely and utterly mad. What was he talking about? Was he telling the truth?

"You don't…"

Sephiroth seemed to snap out of his trance then, and looked back down at him.

"I do." He assured, his hand moving to rub along the boys arm. He stretched forward so Cloud's face, which was turned away from him, was directly below him. "I watched you. You like to read Cloud, don't you? You spent so long in your room reading. I was there with you, did you know? Could you feel me?"

Cloud's eyes opened sharply, turning to face his captor in absolute disgust, his fear momentarily overshadowed. "No." He shouted, shaking his arms in the bindings and feeling them burn, "I didn't, and that was wrong. It was p-private." He kicked his feet in frustration.

Sephiroth just watched Cloud throw his little fit, not bothering to intervene. Cloud needed to release tension; he was a teenager after all. Prone to dramatic outbursts and strops.

"Cloud," he sighed, moving to lean an inch closer to his boy, "Nothing between us is private anymore. We are together now and I desire to know everything I can about you. In return you are free to ask me anything you would like to know about me. We can't have any secrets between us."

Cloud couldn't believe what he was hearing. This wasn't a joke; this psycho was sincere in everything he said and it terrified him. He had never felt so useless in his whole life; he hated the feeling of knowing that this man could do anything he wanted to him. He was so helpless, tied like this with his whole body exposed. The feeling was indescribable.

"I don't want to hear this." He whispered more to himself but Sephiroth heard it too. How could he not; the room was so quite one could hear the footsteps of a spider on the walls.

Sephiroth felt drawn between annoyance and endearment at Clouds refusal to grasp the situation. He wasn't angry but he couldn't wait for this introductory phase to conclude, so that they could get on with their future lives. It made him feel wonderfully impatient.

"You'll understand soon," he said, sitting straight again and turning his attention towards the items on the locker. "Is there anything else you would like to ask me?" He murmured, not taking his eyes off the basin and its contents.

Cloud pressed his cheek into the pillow, keeping his eyes on the wall. He didn't feel like talking to this man anymore. He remained silent.

When the boy didn't say anything Sephiroth shifted his gaze to him again, letting out a breath of amusement. "Are you sure?" He arched his brow, bringing a gloved hand up to rub a small shoulder as he smiled at the solemn teenager.

Cloud knew the man was mocking him, everything he did was just a joke to the man and he couldn't stand how helpless and insignificant it made him feel. If he wasn't allowed to leave then he at least hoped Sephiroth would go, just for now at least. He bristled as the larger man shifted, fearing he was going to touch him again. A cold sweat broke out on his skin but he relaxed when the other stood up, hoping this meant that he was going to leave the room.

Sephiroth muttered something before pulling his hair back from his face and bending down to pick up the basin from the locker. He saw Cloud watching him from the corner of his eye and fell his chest flutter, glad to have the cherub's attention on him. Him and no one else. Ever again.

Cloud was confused when Sephiroth didn't head towards the door as he had expected, instead the tall man walked in the direction of the bathroom with something in his hands. A bowl? He felt his stomach drop. What was he doing? Why wasn't he leaving? His heart started beating, fast and irregular. He twisted his wrists in the leather bonds, becoming more frantic in his attempt to release himself. This was it; he knew something like this was going to happen. He heard Sephiroth moving around in the bathroom. What was he doing? Gaia, he was preparing the items he would use to kill him. Did he have a knife or was he going to use something else? He heard the sound of water hitting plastic and began to feel light headed again, he couldn't breathe. He couldn't catch his breath. He kicked his legs, feeling his temples pulse and his chest vibrate. He didn't want to die. He was going to die now. Why was this happening to him? He closed his eyes and mouth, trying to block out reality.

Sephiroth twisted the silver tap to a halt once the basin was adequately full. He picked up the two sponges he had brought along with him, holding the basin carefully in front of him, made his way out to his boy again.

He was surprised to see Cloud in the state of panic he was in, breathing heavily and kicking his legs and pulling his arms so hard the headboard jerked. His cheeks were rather more red and sweaty than before as well. He narrowed his eyes in askance until he saw Cloud turn to look at him with big wide eyes.

"Please, don't do it." The boy whispered; weariness and horror evident in his voice. He seemed resigned; as though he knew there was nothing that he could do to stop what he thought would happen.

Sephiroth sighed, smiling softly. He had to be more careful with his actions now that Cloud was with him. The boy was not stupid, he knew what happened to most people who found themselves in situations similar to this one and it wasn't a comforting thought. Sephiroth had spent so long dreaming of this, planning it and building this room that it was hard for him to fathom that it was all a complete shock to Cloud. Cloud didn't know of his infatuation, how could he possibly know that he truly did not intend to harm him? He would learn eventually that Sephiroth had his best interests at heart but until then Sephiroth had to explain why and what he was doing when it involved the blond. He wasn't used to having someone with him all the time.

"Cloud," he started, placing the basin on the bedside locker again, a small bit of liquid spilling over the edge and dripping down to absorb in the carpet. "I am sincere when I say that I will not harm you. Not unless you force me anyway." He wanted to comfort him but he also needed to engrave respect into the boys head.

Cloud sighed, feeling lethargic. He turned his head around to look at bowl, noticing that it was full of water. Why did such a simple thing look so daunting now?

"Then what are…you doing?" He cleared his throat when his voice cracked. He had formed ideas in his head that the water was for cleaning his blood, drowning him, scalding him, reviving him, dropping bloody knives into…

Sephiroth held up one of the sponges, his facial expression indicating that it should be obvious. Cloud just stared back at him with wary eyes.

"You must be uncomfortable Cloud. It's quite warm in here and the drug I gave you can cause a slight blood fever. You would feel better if you were cooler." He dropped his hand and ran his thumb along the edge of the soft yellow foamy fabric. Cloud lowered his eyes, seeming to think over what he had said.

"Are you going to…untie me?" He asked timidly, twitching his hands for emphases. Sephiroth kept his expression neutral.

"Not yet." Cloud pursed his lips.

"But…" He began to get a sick feeling in his stomach again. Sephiroth wanted to… touch him? Suddenly the idea hit him and his heartbeat sped up again. It was just as scary as his earlier thoughts, but in a whole different way. He wasn't going to be killed now maybe, but that didn't mean that horrible things wouldn't happen to him. He didn't want this man to touch him, he couldn't handle it.

"Please," he licked his lips, watching the man dip the sponge into the water again. "I'm okay, I-I'm not uncomfortable." His voice shook as he became more desperate.

"You seem uncomfortable." Sephiroth countered, "your clothing is saturated. I'm just going to cool you down a bit." It was true, Clouds t-shirt was dark with perspiration down the front and under his arms, Sephiroth's enhanced sense of smell easily picked up the odor, and strangely he found it more arousing than revolting, perhaps because he knew that that would be the scent in the air the first time he and the boy consummated their love.

"Well untie me then. I can do it myself." Cloud couldn't believe he was having this conversation. With General Sephiroth.

"Shhh" Sephiroth moved closer to the teen, the dripping sponge atypically menacing in his hand. Cloud tried to edge as far away as he could but the bindings only let him move so far. He tensed every part of his body and closed his eyes, only to open them in surprise when the cold foam touched his jaw bone.

Sephiroth watched, feeling his pulse quicken as he dragged the sponge along Clouds pale skin, the liquid leaving a shiny trail behind it. Clouds muscles twitched and jolted as the boy tried to remain as calm and still as possible. His face was pinched and he was breathing as though there was a knife to his throat.

"I'm not hurting you Cloud." He reminded offhandedly, dragging the sponge down to the teen's shoulder. He felt Cloud shudder when large fingers pulled the collar of his top down. "I don't want to cause you any unhappiness." Cloud scoffed, jerking his arms and knocking Sephiroth's hand from his shoulder.

"Then why am I tied to a bed. You can't just tie someone up and expect them to…to trust you." Cloud felt like shouting, screaming, when the silver-haired man just gave him another patronizing smile.

"It's only temporary Cloud. I'll untie you soon enough. Now, don't panic, but I'm going to lift your shirt a small bit." Cloud's eyes widened when he said this.

"No," he started to shout but closed his mouth, breathing through his nose, "No, don't do that. I don't want you to do anything else." He tried again, calmer.

Sephiroth was glad to see that Cloud was regaining some of his spirit. Though the boy seemed to be going from anger to fear randomly, it was good to see some of Cloud's personality shine through his victim persona.

"I'm sorry you feel that way but it's alright. I have more clothing that you can change into later but for now this will do." He smiled to himself darkly for a minute before lifting the hem of the T-shirt and pushing the sponge underneath, onto Cloud's flat stomach.

Cloud winced at the coldness against his naval area. He tried sinking himself further into the mattress, feeling anger and indignity spark through his mind. This was his body. How dare this man think he was entitled to do as he liked with it. But there was nothing he could do but lie there and take it. The cords were too damned tight.

It was hard for Sephiroth to refrain from moving further upwards with the sponge, confining himself to just this small bit of contact. His hands shook as he reluctantly retracted his hand and dropped the thin material of his T-shirt. He watched Clouds chest rise and fall for a minute, feeling his groin tighten. He had to take a few composing breaths in order to gather his mind enough to pick up the sponge and resume his task.

The next ten minutes were silent as Sephiroth wiped the tense boys face, his cheeks and forehead mostly. Cloud clearly wasn't happy about the whole thing but remained quiet and still as he worked.

Once he was finished Sephiroth dropped the sponge back into the basin with a splash and then looked at the two bottles he had left standing beside it. The smaller green one was a Potion and the taller was a plain bottle of water.

"Now," he said, lifting up the low-level Potion. "I'm sure you're thirsty."

"…" The teen said nothing but the tensing of his face and instinctive told Sephiroth that he was right.

"I have water here for you. But you only get it if you behave and drink this."

"I'm not a child," Cloud snapped, his face becoming red. Sephiroth shrugged.

"That's debatable," he murmured, "and irrelevant. You'll drink this or you'll go without liquid for another few hours. I don't think you want to experience the dregs of dehydration."

Clouds eyes moved over and back repeatedly as he tried to think of a way out of this. He didn't want to comply to this monster's wishes. But he was thirsty… and he would be made drink the portion either way.

"What's it for?" He asked, giving a sideways look at the green vial.

"Just to insure your body recuperates fully from the injection." Sephiroth explained, tapping his fingernails against the green glass.

"I feel fine." Cloud said briskly, lifting his elbows over his head. His captor breathed in a long breath and clicked his tongue.

"You're being obstinate." He said carelessly, moving closer. "Drink the potion or I will have to force you. That won't be pleasant." The way he said the words one would swear he was conversing about mild weather.

The bottle was pressed against the teen's tightly closed lips. Cloud moved his head but it followed. When it was pushed harder against his mouth, making his lips squash against his teeth, he sighed and opened his mouth.

The noise of him swallowing the tangy liquid was loud in the silent room, embarrassing him. Sephiroth tilted the bottle until it was completely empty and then pulled away, wiping his thumb against the side of Cloud's lip as he went. Cloud winced and shook the fingers away.

"Good boy. Now you can drink."

The water was blissful against his sandy throat, but the feeling was overshadowed by the sound of his swallowing and the fact that he was being _fed _the water by a demented psycho as though he were an invalid.

Once the bottle was pulled away from his lips his kidnapper stood up, his height intimidating him, and picked up the basin before making his way back to the bathroom.

He emptied the basin and rinsed out the sponge, leaving them under the sin. He went back out and walking over to his boy again. His body was hot, stimulated from the task he had just performed, and he knew he could not stay here too much longer, lest the temptation get the best of him.

Cloud was lying still on the bed, his eyes were open but his head was turned towards the inside wall, staring blankly at it. He looked devastated, like someone had done the most terrible things to him.

"I'll be back in a few hours." He informed. As expected, Cloud ignored him and although it annoyed him he would put up with it for the time being because he knew the boy was simply afraid.

"Alright then. Try to get some more rest."

Cloud didn't even flinch when the man left; he just kept his eyes on the blue wall. The water slowly drying on his skin.

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**R&R**


	16. XVI

**This chapter may contain NCS activity, abuse, upsetting and dark themes.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

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**Chapter 16**

"Get up Reno."

Reno groaned, pushing his face into the pillow beneath him and huffing into the fabric.

"Reno!"

He gritted his teeth and jerked himself up, bracing his weight on his elbows and glaring at the door as if _it _was making him get up. His hair was a complete mess around his head, blocking a good portion of his view.

"Alright," he snarled, getting onto his knees and then sitting back on his heels, the green blanket sliding off his bare back and falling onto the mattress in a heap. The cool but not too cold air felt good on his skin as he stretched noisily. He then got off the bed, making his way towards his closet, clad only in his boxers.

Scratching the juncture between his thigh and groin, the redhead looked at the closet, wringing one of his hands in his loose hair; trying to work out some of the knots with his fingers. It was always like this; hurt like a bitch to brush out.

His closet barley warranted the name; it was more like a wooden structure buried beneath a pile of clothing which were not only strewn over the top, but hanging from the open doors and peeking out from the stuffed drawers as though they were literally trying to escape. He did tidy it…it was just hard to keep it that way... Okay, he didn't tidy it.

He shook his head and noncommittally picked out a black sweater and a pair of dark jeans from the mess. They were wrinkled and untidy looking, but he didn't really give a shit.

He dressed quickly before making his way to the bathroom across the hall, noticing that Axel must already be downstairs since the boy's room was empty. He went into the bathroom and locked the door behind him.

After relieving himself he picked up the hairbrush from the window-sill and stood in front of the small mirror hanging above the sink, it's edges were chipped and the glass was stained but it was still usable.

He became slightly dazed as he watched the reflection of himself brush through the long red strands, snagging at the numerous knots and letting out curses when he did.

"_Reno baby, don't look"._

"_It's okay, just go into the other room."_

"_The dolls with the red hair are the rarest."_

"_You like money?"_

"_Reno run."_

"_I'll kill you."_

He coughed lightly, bringing his hands to rub at his temple for a minute before groaning and grabbing the hair gel-Axel's gel since his was empty- making quick work of styling and tying his hair back, before brushing his teeth and taking his pills.

"Would he have to?"

He heard Axel talking to his mother as he made his way to the kitchen. He pushed open the door and noticed how his aunt, Egnis, jumped slightly. He cocked a brow at her.

"Will who have ta what?" He asked, sinking down on the stool beside Axel and grabbing a piece of toast from the counter.

"Uh, just a thing about my boss. Not important love." His aunt muttered, smiling at him before turning towards the window. Reno liked the kitchen; it was his favorite part of the house. Even though it was small, the large window always seemed to be full of sunshine and it gave the space a pantry-like feel, it was quite different from the rest of the council flat. The only place with a bit of color.

Axel sighed as he fiddled with the piece of toast he was supposed to be eating.

"The fuck s'wrong with you?" Reno muttered, spreading some dumb-apple jam on his own slice.

"I'm tired." The other grumbled, glaring at his mother's back. Egnis seemed to have noticed his unhappy attention and sighed dramatically.

"My dear son thinks he is entitled to miss out on his education because he stays out late with his boyfriend." Reno narrowed his eyes and snickered.

"Oh, got lucky last night did ya?" He nudged his cousin suggestively. Axel sat up and elbowed him back.

"Shut up man." He whispered, jerking his head towards the woman. Reno laughed and sat back, shaking his head.

"Okay boys, I'm off to work my shift. Have a good day. Axel, perk up." Egnis kissed them both on their cheeks before grabbing her jacket and leaving the house.

"So, did ya bone last night then?" Reno snickered after a few more minutes of silence. Axel clicked his tongue and shook his head.

"None of your business Ren."

"No, s'not my business," Reno grinned. He wrapped his arm around his cousin's shoulder and leaned in close, "might be someone else's business though. Does Leon know yer screwing around with his baby bro bro yet?" He laughed when he felt Axel tense up.

"Haven't got around to that yet. Anyway isn't that Sora's job? He's not _my_ big brother." His cousin shrugged his arm off and got up from his stool. Reno let out a bark of laughter.

"Sora's not the one s'gonna get his ass kicked. Fuckers a psychopath."

The older redhead picked at his hair, making Reno want to make fun of his vanity. Though it would be rather hypocritical.

"Ready to go?"

Reno nodded and stuffed the last bit of bread into his mouth.

They took Reno's car to school that morning because Axel's father didn't allow them to take both cars at the same time, waste of mako and all that.

They greeted a couple of people as they made their way through the mundane corridors of their school and into their homeroom. Reno couldn't help but snicker when he saw who was there, waiting for them. This shit would be entertaining.

"Morning." Leon smiled, it seemed slightly dark though. Reno heard Axel clear his throat beside him.

"Hey man, what's up?" Axel's voice sounded a little forced and Reno had to bite the inside of his cheek as he targeted the desk beside Leon and sat down. Axel followed suit, just a bit slower.

"What's new?" Reno asked after a minute of awkward silence. Leon shrugged, turning his attention towards the older redhead.

"You look tired Ax, late night?" Reno nearly fell out of his seat. Leon just raised a dark eyebrow; not taking his eyes from the nervous teen. Oh Gaia, Reno though, his cousin was a dead man.

"Yeah," he heard Axel inhale, "I was out late. Friends..." Reno felt like kicking Axel; being a bit obvious there cuz.

"And that new boyfriend of yours?"

"Yeah…uh-"

"Hmmm, what was that one's name again?" Reno was going to die, he couldn't hold in the laughter much longer. He saw Axel chuckle nervously, scratching the back of his neck.

"You wouldn't know him…"

"Try me." Even Reno felt cold at the ice in the brunet's voice.

"Uh…" Axel started. This was getting a bit tense

"Did ya hear about Zack an Tif?" Reno decided to be a good cousin and help Axel out. He didn't want to get blamed for his death anyway. It wouldn't be very cousinly. He heard Leon sigh and direct his attention towards him. The brunet hadn't been school the day before so he probably didn't know about Zack and Tifa. Not that he'd give even an ounce of shit about it but it did the job. He couldn't act too eager to return to the other topic without compromising his advantage.

"What about them?"

"They broke up." Zack had told him about that the day before. He hadn't been that surprised; they seemed to be having more bad times than good lately. It was obvious Zack wanted Cloud anyway. Well, that was obvious since they were about eight. And they couldn't even get hard-ons back then.

"Oh, well I'm not overly surprised." Leon sat back and crossed his arms over his chest.

Axel shot Reno a quick grateful look and Reno smirked.

"Neither was I." He commented lightly. "Tifa's got the tits but Zack aint-"

"Reno." He heard Axel grunt. He narrowed his eyes at the others interruption but then looked towards the door to see 'tits' in question enter. Eh, typical.

"Hey." Tifa said as she sat down, Yuna doing the same. Leon and Axel both hummed a greeting. Reno felt like rolling his eyes at their awkwardness

"Hi Tif. Glad to see ya back." He decided to break the tension. It was better than being weird and quite in his book.

"Thanks Reno." He kind of felt bad for what he was about to say about her; she looked sad. Uncomfortable with the emotion, he smirked at the girl.

"So," the redhead started. He saw her narrow her eyes and felt like gulping; the girl was bad ass; she knew Karate or some shit and he'd experienced her anger more than once in the past.

"Yes?" She answered with a raised brow. He leaned forward.

"I hear yer single again."

"Reno!" The all scoffed and abused him, but he didn't mind when he saw her chuckling.

"You're retarded." Axel muttered, flicking his pencil him. Oh, he would pay for that. He was going to be a good cousin and help him out but… not after that.

"Jeeze Axel. Just 'cause yer screwing that boy doesn't mean everyone's satisfied." He sneered; staring challengingly at the boy who he was sure was ready to kill him.

"What boy?" Tifa asked and he tilted his head in mock curiosity, widening his eyes and smiling when he heard Leon speak.

"Yes." Silence. "What boy. Axel?" His cousin's eyes rounded as the brunet regarded him.

"Uh, it's eh." Reno snickered as Axel looked uncomfortable. He leaned back and watched with amusement as the boy tried to come up with an excuse, his mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. But his fun was interrupted when someone called out a name beside him. He looked over to the classroom door to see the small girl, Yuffie, come through in a flustered state. Someone stole her candy?

"Yuf?"

"What's wrong?" Axel asked. Probably more than delighted by the interruption.

Reno waited for girl to say something characteristically immature so they could blow it off and resume the real entertainment.

"Cloud's gone missing."

Oh… shit.

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Sephiroth brushed the snow from his shoulders, closing the door behind him with his foot. There were some difficulties about living where he did; mainly the weather. At the best of times Modeoheim was cold, but usually it was inhumanly freezing, windy and blindingly snowy. Without his enhanced sight, strength and tolerance to the elements Sephiroth may not have survived the journey to his new work place at this time of year.

He un-wrapped the black hood and cloak from his face, hanging the now dripping garment on the wall-hook, the snowflakes quickly turned into liquid as they dripped onto the tiled floor.

He lifted his hair from his back as he made his way towards the kitchen. It was six o' clock in the evening, eight hours since he had last seen his boy. He smiled to himself; loving the feeling of returning home from work and not being alone. It was so…'exciting' was supposedly the correct word though he would have preferred not to use it. To have something to look forward to when returning home. To have someone there, the only person who he could be with on this planet, it was surreal. He felt the urge to see the boy straight away, to make sure it hadn't all been an illusion in his mind.

The soft lights gave the kitchen a yellowish glow as they flickered to illumination. Even though it was early in the evening the world outside the windows was almost pitch black, giving the house a more homely feeling than the ice mansion it was during the day.

He walked over to the fridge and opened it, scanning the contents there. Cloud hadn't eaten since he had brought him here; almost two days ago. The drug and the potion were all that staved off the hunger and he had only consumed the minimal amount of liquid so by now he would be in need of proper nourishment. Getting the boy to eat it would be difficulty but he wouldn't be allowed refuse for long.

He took off his gloves as he scanned through the items that packed the shelves. What would his boy feel like now? Nothing too heavy as it would make him sick after the short fast. He decided on Dhalmel soup.

As he started preparing the dish-it was the packaged kind, he was no cook- he was again struck with a feeling of elation. He could not fathom that he was preparing food for Cloud Strife; his Cloud strife. His core. The boy he had watched and longed after for so long was now in the same house as him. Waiting for him to come and decide his faith. His name, and his words would be running through the boys mind over and over again. Him, only him and no one else from now on.

He put the saucepan of water on the hob and went about mixing the soup powder in a bowl with milk, stirring until it was a fine paste. It was his job to ensure that Clouds health remained intact; his food would have to be nutritious and low fat. The thought struck him that he should probably get his charge a Vitamin D elixir, as he would be exposed to very little sunshine for some time.

Once the water was boiling he emptied the paste in and stirred until it was cooked into an attractively scented soup. He then poured the liquid into a deep plastic bowel he had gotten from beneath the sink, and covered it with the attached lid. Remembering to bring a spoon and a napkin, the General exited the kitchen and made his way to the room that contained the most important thing on the planet.

Cloud was turned away from him, lying still on the bed. He could tell the boy was awake because his breathing was rapid and uneven and his neck was stiff against the pillow. Sephiroth smiled and put the food down on the locker, out of the way for the time being.

"Cloud." He moved over to the bed, kneeling down beside it. Closing his eyes, he allowed the smell of the teenager to assault him, absorb into him. It was nirvana; the promised land. Cloud created all pleasure; he was its catalyst.

Sephiroth opened his eyes to see the boy still facing away from him, his lips pursed and browed knitted, as if he were trying desperately to control himself. He lifted his hand and placed it on the boy's hot cheek.

Cloud jolted at the feeling of the other's cold skin on him, it felt like he was being stung repeatedly. He moved to look at the man, hating how composed and calm he looked. Not a bit stressed, or nervous. It was as though that this was all normal. Tying someone to a bed, threatening them, touching them against their will? It was a total invasion of privacy and yet Sephiroth didn't care. How often had he done this for it to be so common-place?

His skin felt dirty. No, that sounded false; people always say that and it didn't even nearly do justice to how he felt at that moment. It couldn't explain how he literally wanted to shred his flesh from his bones, tear off everything that this…demon had stained.

He had never experienced anything as bad as the wipe-down he had endured that morning. It seemed like such a small thing but…it just made him sick. The way the man looked at him, touched his fingers against his flesh as he cleaned him. To just lie there and have someone do that to you, as if you were some kind of invalid, or child. It was disgusting and it turned his stomach because there was nothing he could do about it.

"Do you want to be untied Cloud?" Sephiroth withdrew his hand and looked at him as if he was genuinely curious about the answer. Cloud felt like shouting. What was wrong with this man?

He swallowed and nodded his head, almost afraid of the sound of his hair brushing against the pillow. He didn't know what to do around his kidnapper, whether a sound or a movement he made would trigger something bad in the others mind.

Sephiroth softened his expression and gently rubbed the boys shoulder, running his hand up his neck, stopping beneath his collarbone.

"Hush, don't get upset now. I'll untie you, but first you'll have to do something for me. Understand?" Cloud brought his gaze away. He needed to be untied, his arms were aching and numb and he had to use the bathroom badly. What would be the cost though? What would he have to pay for such a small bit of freedom?

"What?" And so he asked, but he didn't look at Sephiroth because he knew that that infuriating, evil smile would be on his face. He had to be evil; no one good would do this to him and be able so smile so calmly.

"I want you to promise me that you will do as I say once you are untied." Sephiroth watched the boy become uneasy again, twitching and jerking in his bonds. He grabbed his chin and turned his face towards him. Cloud stopped moving and looked at him again.

"What d'you want me t-." He started to say but Sephiroth shook his head.

"If you do not answer I will leave. I'm sure you don't want to remain this way for another night?"

"It's your fault I'm this way." Cloud gritted his teeth, jerking his hands. Sephiroth brought his finger to his lips, his eyes shadowing. Cloud felt his stomach knot.

"Do you want to be untied or not?" His kidnappers tone was impatient and Cloud had no doubt that he would leave him here for another night. His anger again faded to despair and he sighed. He couldn't stay here any longer, he would definitely wet the bed and that would be beyond humiliating.

"Y-yes. I'll do what you want."

"Very well, but be aware that I will not hesitate to retie you if you become troublesome." Sephiroth gave him a stern glare which caused him to flinch. He wanted to object to being treated like a child but it seemed so unimportant at that moment.

Sephiroth leaned forward, ignoring how Cloud almost stopped breathing as his much larger chest brushed against him, his hair falling around his face. He undid the catch on the leather binding around one small wrist, releasing his arm but leaving the restraint hanging from the headboard.

"Ah," Cloud hissed as the burning leather was pealed from his raw skin.

"I'll bring you something to help that later." The silver haired man muttered, examining the painful looking lines on the wrist for a minute before it was eagerly pulled away.

He did the same to Clouds left hand and then sat back. Cloud timidly brought his wrists to his chest, rubbing them and cringing at the pain. It felt like he had been burned with a brand and the marks were a deep red and bleeding in some places. Sephiroth stood up and walked over to the closet as the teen slowly sat up.

Clouds bones were tight as moved, crossing his legs and moaning slightly as all the stiff muscles from his back to his thighs were moved from the lengthily position they had been in. The stinging in his wrists caused his eyes to water more and he kept his face lowered as he watched the man across the room. Sephiroth opened the press door and quickly took something out of it before walking back to him.

Cloud looked at clothing draped over the man's arm. He could tell there were two items but be couldn't see their shape, only that they were both a light cream color, the larger one almost looked like a night shirt. He looked up as Sephiroth walked towards him and held out his arm, offering the clothing to him.

He gave a hesitant glance towards the others face and then, moving reluctantly he took the offering, trying to avoid any bodily contact.

His expression wilted as he studied the clothes, dread and confusion seeping into his stomach. It was pajamas really; a long cream linen shirt and a mid-thigh length pair of shorts to go under it, made of the same material. It almost looked like something they wore in old films. He couldn't imagine himself wearing this; it was humiliating and just…strange. He didn't understand why Sephiroth would want him to wear such a thing.

"I-I can't wear this." He held the clothes back to the taller man, looking down so he wouldn't have to see his expression.

Sephiroth studied the boy, loving how small and vulnerable he looked on the large bed. The blonde's eyes were covered by his hair but he knew they would be watery and big as he tried to convince himself that he wouldn't have to wear what Sephiroth wanted him to. That he didn't have to do what Sephiroth wanted him to.

They both knew otherwise.

He knelt down on one knee, reaching out and touching the boy's face, following it when Cloud tried to move away. As usual Cloud went tense beneath his touch, but it hardly mattered because the softness of the boy's cheek against his uncovered hand was more pleasurable than anything Sephiroth had experienced that day. He ignored Clouds attempts to shake his hand off and only chuckled when the teen hissed angrily and moved his body away towards the far wall. Slowly getting to his knees, he easily followed and trapped the petit form against the corner. In one swift movement he caught the boys chin, grasping it firmly and earning himself and annoyed grunt.

"It's rude to reject gifts Cloud." The blond tried to look away but he couldn't get his chin out of the hold.

"But they're…I can't wear those. They're…weird." He jumped when the other let out a loud laugh.

"Don't be so childish Cloud," Sephiroth said with real amusement, shaking his head incredulously. He laughed again and then looked down at the clothes in Clouds hand. "They're for boys your age, I selected them myself. They're just a bit different from what you're used to." He felt his blood heat up; Cloud was so innocent.

"Well," Cloud started, feeling weak and foolish at the other's mockery, "I still don't want to wear them. C-cant I just keep my old clothes?" He looked at Sephiroth pleadingly.

Sephiroth really did hate to disappoint such a pretty face but the thought of Cloud dressed in those clothes was just too much to resist. Cloud was his angel, his innocent little cherub and that would be all the more obvious when the boy was dressed like one. The blond was gorgeous in anything but Sephiroth wanted him separated from the outside world. Normal young people's attire wouldn't suit his boy; he wasn't a normal after all. He had to wear something that exposed his pureness and something he would be comfortable in. This outfit was perfect, and seven more of its identical copies lay folded in the closet.

"Your clothes are dirty. There is no discussion here Cloud. You will wear this," He stopped talking and gave the boy a severe look, his thumb dragging against across the boys plump bottom lip, and then inclined his head in the direction of the headboard. "Or you will be tied again."

Cloud sighed heavily, closing his eyes. He knew there was no way he was going to get out of this; Sephiroth was not lying about anything he said; why would he? It's not like Cloud could do anything to stop him now, even unrestrained he was little more than an insect to this man. He could be crushed any moment.

He couldn't believe this was happening. It really wasn't a dream…

"Alright." He said softly but couldn't help giving the other a hateful look. Sephiroth narrowed his eyes slightly but retracted his hand and stood up from the bed.

"Good boy." He said and Cloud grit his teeth.

"I'm not a child." He meant to say it with more force but he couldn't gather it.

"Indeed." His kidnapper replied idly as he made to turn in the direction of the bathroom, "Follow me. I'll show you how to work the shower."

"I don't want to-"

"I will not repeat myself again."

Cloud felt his heart speed up as he stared into his kidnapper's green eyes, feeling the urge to tell him off but... those eyes; they weren't human eyes. They belonged to a beast; a monster. And now they were filled with a dangerous anger, which was directed at him. It made him nervous.

"Follow. Me."

He didn't want to follow him, the thought of being in such a small space with the strange man was horrific but…he had no choice, and his bladder was beginning to hurt.

Sephiroth was standing by the sink when Cloud slowly walked in, holding the new clothes with both hands pressed to his chest, making them bunch under his chin. He looked like a child holding a teddy-bear tightly to himself after waking up from a nightmare and seeking a parent to comfort him. Sephiroth doubted the boy would find any comfort in him at the moment, and that made him genuinely unhappy. The blond looked up at him with sad eyes.

"You just turn the knob right if you want hot water and left if you want it cold, then pull it out until you hear it click. Understand." Cloud felt like rolling his eyes at the tone being used with him.

"I don't want to do that here." He tried, but Sephiroth cut him off.

"You'll feel better. There's nothing to be afraid of. I won't invade you're privacy." Again Cloud wanted to contradict the man. Invade his privacy. They were a bit past that already. But he knew it was futile to argue, and he would eventually have to do as he was told. He just wanted to be left alone now.

"Okay." He said softly, nodding his head and keeping his eyes down. Sephiroth looked at him for a moment, causing him to cast a quick glance up at him in uncertainty.

"I have food for you when you're finished, take as long as you need." The tall man walked past the boy who kept his eyes averted and his body as far away as he could. He sighed.

"I'm really not the monster you think I am Cloud."

He closed the door.

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The water felt like slime running down his esophagus, and he swallowed it with a tight throat as he stared blankly ahead.

Two days.

Two days and not even a sign of his friend. He couldn't believe it. Sky was positive Cloud had left for school that morning, but he had never made it there and so the authorities were certain that if he had been abducted or attacked it had happened along that route. But they couldn't find anything there; not one thing that could even give them a clue as to what happened that morning. All they could do was guess; it was all a big guessing game.

In the last two days the teen had searched every single alleyway, crossroad and side lane in the area, about twenty times each. It was no use though; there was nothing. It was as if the boy had just vanished.

Angeal had taken a team to search the more…desolate areas of the city, places known for trafficking and criminal behavior, but so far nothing useful had been discovered. His uncle hadn't allowed Zack to accompany them either, stating that it would only upset him more.

He didn't think that was possible.

"Fuck." He pulled at his black bangs, leaning his head forward onto his knees. How could this be happening? He couldn't believe this was real.

When he was out during the day, searching and avoiding the Gaia-damned reporters who were accumulating by the hour, his mind almost forgot the situation. It went into a sort of status which allowed his body to become controlled by physical motions and adrenaline. He knew Cloud was missing, and that he desperately had to find him, but it was all external, the reality of the situation was hidden behind the sensationalism and panic.

It was when he was alone, forced by the others to 'rest', that he really fell apart. At those moments the reality of the situation hit him. Cloud was gone. His Cloud. It just… he had never even considered something like this happening. Not really. His mind was tortured with the idea that he had woken up that morning, happy and hopeful as he always was, and by that night everything, absolutely everything had changed. It was so fucking unreal it made him feel dizzy every time he thought about it. How had he been so…careless? Why was he so arrogant and naive to the world? He should have known somehow. And now Cloud was just gone and there didn't seem to be anything he could do about it.

Tears stung his eyes as the boy's face flashed through his mind. He couldn't think of it. Two days now, Gaia knows what would happen to him in that amount of time. He wasn't weak or a wimp by any means but he was so…small. What were they doing to him? Were they hurting him, torturing him, mocking him? Why were they doing it? He didn't deserve it. He just wanted them to stop. Stop, stop, stop. He needed him back.

There was no moving beyond it, he didn't care what anyone said to him. He wouldn't move past this, ever. Not until he found him. There was nothing now, no taste, no smell, no happiness. Everything was dull and grey and sickening. He couldn't even remember a time when it wasn't this way. There was no way he had ever been happy; it was impossible.

He threw the empty bottle on the carpet, letting it bounce off the coffee table first. He stared at it with red rimmed eyes.

His phone screeched loudly in his pocket and he jumped, instantly fumbling for the device.

"Yeah, yea- what? Hello." He fell over his words, slamming the hard plastic against his ear.

"_Zack."_ Angeal's voice.

"Yeah, well did you find anything?"

"_No, no I'm just calling to see if you went home." _

He gritted his teeth to deal with the pain in his stomach from the disappointment, and then sighed.

"I'm home." He answered. "But I'm not staying long."

"_Wait until I come back. I'm on the way."_

"Alright. See you then." He mumbled, closing his phone and letting it fall onto the couch.

Where are you Cloud?

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Once alone, Cloud breathed a sigh of relief, letting his shoulders slump. Gaia, he couldn't stand being near that man. It was all confusing; it was just too…civil. He expected to be abused, tortured, starved killed or whatever else went on in situations where people were kidnapped. Not this. Being given clothes, asked to shower. It wasn't what he expected.

He left the clothes down on the sink and then looked around. This was an expensive room; he didn't think he had ever been anywhere so…shiny. He ran his hand along the edge of the sink, feeling the smoothness of the marble. The room was really fancy, the walls were all white tile with emerald cracks in them, the sink and toilet bowl matched the walls while everything else was just plain white. It was so much different to his bathroom at home.

He shook his head, rubbing his scalp thought his hair. He tried to keep his mind blank as he walked over to the door, surprised to see that he could lock it. That was comforting; even though he knew his kidnapper in particular could probably break down the entire thing with minimal effort.

There was nothing in the room he could use as a weapon, the mirror was engraved into the wall and couldn't be pulled out. Besides the few toiletries supplied, there wasn't anything that even resembled a weapon.

He sighed and reluctantly walked over to the daunting structure of the shower, taking a breath and turning it on while noticing that even the taps were sterling silver and not a bit rusted; definitely new. The water came on at a steady flow, startling him with the pressure. His ears rang with the noise as he slowly took off his T-shirt. He kept his eyes on the door, expecting it to open any moment as he stripped off the rest of his clothes. When it came time to pull his boxers down he stopped and had to take a few breaths before he could do it.

Hyperconscious of his nudity, he swiftly relieved himself and then stepped in under the water, wincing at the heat. He stood under the stream for a few minutes, letting it roll down his face and chest. Cloud was the kind of person who usually liked taking a shower, the warm water relaxed him and he had often found relief from his…teenage hormones within the secluded environment. This was completely different though, he was tense and jittery and his movements were stiff because of how uncomfortable he felt doing it in a strange place he didn't know.

He picked up the shower cream and poured it into his hand, lathering it into his torso, paying particular attention to his shoulders and neck; they seemed to be the dirtiest part of him. The soap smelt of peaches, and when he used the shampoo he found it had a similar scent. It was pretty girly; he usually used store brand stuff that smelt muskier and less like fruit or flowers.

About fifteen minutes later the newly washed blond stood in front the mirror, staring at his reflection with growing despair. He tugged at the sleeve of his new attire, clenching his jaw. He looked ridiculous. If he felt vulnerable before it was nothing compared to what he felt now. He didn't want to go out to Sephiroth dressed like this, it was mortifying and he couldn't fathom why the man wanted wearing such unusual clothes that made him look like he was in a hospital or something. The shirt reached a few inches above his knees, exposing some of his thighs and his calves which made him uncomfortable.

His stomach cramped, making him bend forward and wince, curling his arm around his waist. He let out a soft moan, waiting the cramp out before standing upright again. He fisted his hand in his damp hair, clenching his eyes shut.

He couldn't stand this, the fear was killing him and he couldn't take it for much longer. He needed to know why he was really here, what Sephiroth really wanted. Even though he was terrified of the answer, he needed it.

Another cramp seized his abdomen and he gasped, gritting his teeth. He wanted to leave. He was going to die here.

"Cloud?" His eyes snapped open when he heard the man knock on the door. Sephiroth was waiting for him; he knew he had finished his shower and now he had to leave that small bit of freedom behind him again. He stood up, giving one last glance towards his pitiful reflection before turning and unlocking the door.

Once he appeared, Sephiroth let his eyes run over the boys form. Perfect. He had imagined Cloud like this so often in the last few months that it was hard for him to believe that the vision before him wasn't just another fantasy. At the same time it was so obvious this was real. Cloud was so much more vivid standing in front of him like this; his bright hair and pale skin, the equally pale fabric touching against his flesh and teasing out the body hidden beneath it. He was all pale, except for the two bright eyes shimmering in blue from his face and that odd mass of yellow hair.

He walked over to stand in front his boy, looking down at him while feeling smug. He had won. Cloud was here with him now, dressed as he wanted him. He was all his.

"You look perfect Cloud." The boy just crossed his arms and looked down.

"I have some food for you. I don't want any protests now, just eat it or you'll be tied up again." The tall man pointed towards the covered dish on the locker. Cloud looked it, realizing that eating was probably the last thing he wanted to do now.

"I'm not hungry."

"I told you I didn't want any protests."

"I _said _I'm not hungry." Sephiroth licked along the inside of his jaw, his top lift twisting into a semi-sneer.

"What you say," he slammed his hand down on Clouds shoulder, making the boy wince and try to shrug away, "does not matter. You listen to me."

"Let go." But Sephiroth forcefully pulled the boy towards the bed, ignoring his grunts and attempts to pull back, and then pushed him down onto the mattress. Cloud let out an annoyed huff and quickly turned his body around to face him again. He watched the demon-like man throw his hair back from his face before picking up the container.

"Eat." Sephiroth offered the container to him, his eyes hard and unmoving. Cloud dug his nails into the quilt underneath his left hand.

"No,"

"No?"

"I-I'm not hungry…"

"Do you want to be tied up again? I can promise you you'll be left there longer the next time."

The thought made Cloud shudder, but he still couldn't bring himself to accept the man's food. It would be giving in. When he didn't say anything but simply stared down at his lap with flaming cheeks, Sephiroth growled and made to put the dish back on the locker.

"No don't," he said quickly before he could stop himself. He what the action meant. His kidnapper cocked a silver brow.

"You'll eat?"

Cloud sighed, trying to think of a way around this but falling short. He very reluctantly accepted the offer in the end.

"Good." Sephiroth said in a pleased tone, making Cloud more indignant and almost refuse again.

"I don't feel like eating." The blond grumbled, holding his head downwards as he took the warm dish. "I just want to know what you want. Why am I here?"

"We'll talk about that later." Cloud shook his head; there was no sense to any of this. He turned his attention to the container in his hand, slowly clicking the lid open. The smell of the soup filled his nostrils while he was handed a spoon wrapped in a small napkin. He felt a bit sick as he watched the metallic item sink into the brown liquid.

"Um…"

Sephiroth tilted his head, looking at him squarely.

"Well?" He said in his deep voice. Cloud bit the inside of his cheek and sat straighter.

"Can you leave? I don't like when people watch me eating." This made the man smile, as everything else he did seemed to do.

"I've watched you eating before Cloud, many times." Cloud felt a shiver run through his spine at that sentence; he didn't want to hear that. It was seriously creepy.

"Still I-"

"Eat, Cloud." Sephiroth didn't change his expression. The teen looked at him again, his mouth forming a straight line. He exhaled and turned back towards the dish.

Picking up the spoon, he scooped a bit of the liquid and brought it to his mouth. Trying not to spill, and to make as little noise as possible, he parted his lips and took the first taste. It may have been pleasant, but he was far too sick to appreciate it. He swallowed several more awkward spoonfuls before pausing, letting his stomach settle a bit.

"I don't understand why you took me here." He mumbled lowly, his eyes darting up to the man.

"I've explained enough for now." Sephiroth replied just as soft. He was so surreal standing there. His height, his body, his hair, his face. He wasn't like any person the teen had ever seen before. It was overwhelming to be so close to him, especially when he was doing these things to him.

"I don't want to stay." He countered, trying to keep his expression stony. The man didn't even blink.

"I'm aware of that."

Cloud was going to open his mouth again but just shook his head, picking up his spoon and resuming eating. More hungry now that he had started.

They didn't speak for the rest of the meal, but Sephiroth didn't mind. He was happy to just watch the boy and be with him. Cloud was awkward and nervous as he ate, his eyes sneaking up to him every few seconds like a jittery chocobo.

Cloud put his spoon down eventually, there was still some liquid left in the bowl, and he looked at Sephiroth.

"I'm full." He said, and it seemed as though he was worried that he would be forced to finish the rest. Sephiroth just nodded and took the bowl from him.

"Alright. I'm going to leave you alone for the rest of the night. I've left water for you. You can watch television if you're bored. Don't sleep until your hair is dry or you'll get a sore neck." Cloud nodded despondently and crossed his legs in front of him. He bristled when he felt Sephiroth place his hand on his head, ruffling his damp hair.

"You behaved well. If you continue to do so you'll find that being here is not the terrible thing you are imagining it to be." Sephiroth clicked his tongue and then moved back. Cloud rubbed at his forehead and shook his head, leaving out a breath.

"I don't know what to do here. Can't you understand that?" He asked; exasperation and weariness in his voice.

"I do." Sephiroth replied honestly, holding his hand out in front of him. "And If I could change that I would. But for the moment I just hope you'll be at ease with the knowledge that nothing will harm you here."

"You don't understand then" Cloud murmured, looking down at the bedspread. Sephiroth pressed his lips together and contemplated him for a minute, then decided that there was nothing to say. The boy would learn in time.

The last thing he did was retrieve Cloud's old clothing from the bathroom before making his way up the stairs again.

"Have a good night, Cloud."

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**I'd like to say thank you to everyone who welcomed me back and I'm glad this story hasn't been completely forgotten after the long break. I'm also really happy to see that I have some new readers so hello there and I hope you enjoyed this chapter.**

**I really hope everyone will take the time to review this chapter because I love to hear what you all think and any criticism or advice that could help me improve future chapters is more than welcome. I update faster when I know people are interested and enjoy what's going on.**

**See you next chapter!**


	17. XVII

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

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He stood in the doorway, folding his arms and glaring. The younger brunet tried to ignore him as he swished about the room, gathering the different items he would need for the day.

"Want to tell me where you were last night?"

"Its none of your business Leon. Dad doesn't care so why should you?" He uncrossed his arms and gave the small boy a withering look.

"What's this attitude about? Why the secrecy?" His brother sighed, his brow furrowing in anger.

"I just want to keep this to myself for a while. Anyway, you'd just overreact if I tell you." This made him narrow his eyes.

"What would I overreact to?" He smirked when he saw the blond become flustered, almost dropping the notebook in his hand.

"Leave me alone." Sora spats childishly and then pushed past him roughly. Leon watched him stomp down the hall, contemplated following him and hounding him for a while longer, but then just sighed; perhaps he would have more luck with the other suspect.

He shook his hair out of his eyes and looked down towards opposite end of the hall, eyes focusing on the last door to the left. His expression darkened and he licked the inside of his teeth. He clenched his jaws as he started walking towards the door, trying to control his anger.

The door vibrated as his fist banged against the wood, and he shook his head when he heard the grumble from inside. Not waiting to be invited, he opened the door. The stench of alcohol mixed with stale breath almost made him gag and he had to breath outwards for a minute.

Disgusting.

"Are you going to work?" He asked in a low voice, glaring at the form beneath the blankets. Said form mumbled something before answering.

"Not today. Sick as a Mog." Leon felt his blood boil.

"Whiskey will do that to you…"

"Fer fuck sakes Leon, just leave it for today. Yeah?" His father hoarse voice showed exasperation and a deep kind of weariness. Leon chuckled dryly.

"And yesterday, and tomorrow, and the day aft-."

"Leon-"

"You're pitiful. No wonder she left."

"Get the fuck out." The teen wanted to say more but he just scoffed and slammed the door closed with a bang. He stormed down hall and into the kitchen, leaning against the counter heavily.

"Is the hung-over bad today?" Sora's soft voice spoke up from the corner of the kitchen and Leon worried his top lip, rolling his eyes towards the ceiling.

"Yeah," he answered and listened to the deep sigh from the voice which had not quite broken fully.

"Well," his brother said, "maybe tomorrow." Leon was about to say something sarcastic back when he turned and saw the grin on the small boy's face. He felt himself lighten a bit.

"Idiot." He ruffled the younger boy's spiky hair and then went to grab his school bag. "You ready?" Sora nodded and they headed outside to his jeep.

On the way to school he noticed that Sora was almost asleep against the window. He frowned.

"If you stay out that late again I'll beat the shit out of you." Sora scowled but kept his eyes ahead.

"Your such a control freak Leon. Leave it alone for now, okay?" Leon chuckled which caused the younger boy to get more annoyed.

"I mean it, leave it."

"Sure…"

"Leon."

"I said sure."

"Huhhhhhh"

Once they arrived, they said quick goodbyes to each other and headed to begin their separate days. Leon walked through the mostly empty corridor, his leather boots banging heavily against the ground. He stopped at his locker and opened it. While he was grabbing his Geography book he glanced at the row of lockers beside his and smirked; Seifer would have hated the pretentious plaque left in his memory.

His smile turned downwards and he lowered his eyes for a minute in contemplation.

Shaking his head, he selected what he needed before slamming his locker shut and heading to his classroom. There was no one else there when he walked in the door; he was glad for that.

He sat down and placed his books on the desk before leaning back and sighing, closing his eyes. Fifteen minutes of silence followed before a few of his classmates entered the room and began conversing loudly. It annoyed him as usual. Couldn't they just shut the fuck up?

He perked up and felt his lips twitch into a smirk when the exact person he wanted to see entered the room. He sat up straighter.

"Hey." He smiled, not hiding the lack of sincerity. He licked his back wisdom tooth as he watched Axel clumsily get to his seat without looking at him.

"Hey man, what's up?" Oh, so he was playing it innocent. Leon could appreciate that.

"What's new?" Reno asked him but he just shrugged away the distraction, focusing his attention on his target.

"You look tired Ax, late night?" He saw Reno try not to laugh out of the corner of his eye and Axel's nervousness didn't evade his notice.

"Yeah," the older cousin inhaled, "I was out late. Friends..."

"And that new boyfriend of yours..." If Axel was trying to appear causal, he was failing miserably as he squirmed and made some strange noises with his throat.

"Uh…yeah."

"Hmmm, what was that boys name again?" His attempt to keep his tone light may have failed.

"You wouldn't know him…" Oh, don't go there Axel.

"Try me."

"Uh…" He leaned in, feeling like he had finally caught the boy out. He wanted to hear it from his mouth.

"Did ya hear about Zack an Tif?" Damn Reno, Leon felt like roaring at the other to shut his mouth, instead he just clenched his jaw and replied.

"What about them?"

"They broke up." He didn't really care; it was inevitable. Tifa Lockheart and Zack Fair were no more suited together than his own parents were. He didn't really know if any two people were.

"Oh, well I'm not overly surprised."

"Neither was I." Reno irritatingly kept speaking. "Tifa's got the tits but Zack's just ain't-"

"Reno!"

He was trying to find a way to change the subject back to Sora when he saw that Tifa and Yuna had appeared at the door.

"Hey." Tifa said and he mumbled a hello.

"Hi Tif. Glad to see ya back." He heard Reno say. Of course the redhead didn't know the word subtlety.

As he normally did when he was uninterested, the brunet spaced out of the conversation until a comment worthy of mortifying a mog brought him back to reality.

"I hear you're single again." Gaia, that redhead had guts. He would never, ever, be able to say something like that. He strangely admired Reno for it. Things were bad if he was admiring Reno.

"You're retarded." Axel muttered, which brought his attention back to the object of his current interest.

"Jeeze Axel. Just because you're screwing that boy doesn't mean everyone is satisfied." Oh thank you Reno. He sat up straight again.

"What boy?" Tifa asked and he smirked.

"Yes," he said lowly, "What boy Axel?" He kept his eyes even with Axel's rounded ones.

"Uh, you wouldn't know him." He felt like snorting when the redhead resorted to that again. He sat up to correct the little prick when everyone tuned their heads to the classroom door.

He looked over to spot a very frantic looking Yuffie at the door. He felt his eyes narrow because that kind of expression didn't suit her.

"What's wrong?" He heard one of the others ask.

"Clouds gone missing."

Everything is bad.

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Sephiroth pulled the damp hair out from beneath his robe, letting it fall heavily against his back. He set the copy he had in has hands down by his side on the bed before reaching forward to the open book-bag that lay beside his legs.

He took out another notebook, flipping open the hard cover and scanning through the inside contents. This was a chemistry notebook, and Cloud clearly had no interest in Chemistry. Sephiroth smiled at the cartoon-like characters littered across the edges of the pages. He couldn't quite picture the side of Cloud Strife that would create a caption of a cat standing on a stick figure titled Yuffie's head.

He leaned back against the headboard and scanned over the words on the pages, just relishing in the fact that they were all written by Cloud. Humans spent thousands of Gil and hours visiting museums and historical sights; just the have the opportunity to view something that was created by their ancestors, whom most of them admired. This was similar, Sephiroth mused, he was relishing in the fact that he was able to view something created by someone he admired, someone he loved. It brought them closer together.

He had watched Cloud for so long, studied everything that he could about him and he felt that he knew Cloud intimately because of it. He had been with Cloud in some of his most personal moments, moments where the boy thought he was alone and therefore felt free to be himself. Sephiroth saw that Cloud put on a different persona to the outside world, that he was much more effected by his mothers illness than he let on, and it was this secret vulnerability which was one of the reasons he was so in love with him. He loved the stronger side of Clouds character too, he liked that the boy had a spirit, that he would stand up for himself. He liked that even though he had a lot of very mature qualities, Cloud was still a child and acted like that a lot of the time.

However, Sephiroth still felt like he was an outsider to Cloud's world. He wanted to know everything about Cloud. Absolutely everything. He wanted to know what the boy thought and what he felt in all different situations. Cloud wasn't just a body, he was a soul. Sephiroth knew that he could watch the boy for as long as he wanted, but that still wouldn't give him the access he desired. It frustrated him to the point of hysteria, and he often found himself having to find different ways of venting his frustrations. He had had to substitute his lust for the boy with his lust for death, going to the lower levels of the city and killing any monster that crossed his path.

His expression darkened; he hadn't only killed monsters down there.

It relaxed him to know that having Cloud with him now had already filled a part of that gap. The fact that he was physically close to the boy was enough to calm his temper. He had never felt so connected with someone before, Genesis and the rest of his bed partners were all merely practice for the ultimate thing.

He gave a quick glance to Cloud's bag before looking back at the page in front of him. The end pages were always the most interesting because they were even more vandalized with pictures and seemed to contain notes from one of his friends. Sephiroth found the conversations quit humorous, mostly because he was trying to re-create Cloud's facial expression as he wrote.

_Cloud I'm in luuuuuuuuv_

Unusual. Who this time?

_Reeve (sigh)_

**Professor?**

_Yeah! hes seriously hot._

**old**

_no mature! I think he likes me to_

**Really (sarcastic)**

_im gonna ask him outttt!_

**He's looking at us.**

Although they were insignificant little dabbles that were probably forgotten by the blond once the pages were turned, they were all important to Sephiroth and helped him learn more about his boy, about his temperament and humor. He enjoyed the exploration.

Though there was a dull sense of misery lingering at the back of his mind.

Cloud had a life. And he had nothing to do with it. That had to change. It _had_ to change.

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"Zack, hey Zack."

The teen sighed, his temples pounding. He turned slowly and didn't bother to reply as he saw Yuffie running over to him. He noticed dispassionately that she looked terrible; her skin was pale and her hair flat and greasy. None of her normal style was present as she walked towards him in a black T-shirt and denim shorts.

"Hi," she said in a lethargic voice.

"Hi." He mumbled in return. Someone in the background let out a shout and they both looked over quickly. It was just one of the men calling another over to him.

"They haven't found anything at all." She clicked her tongue. "It's freaking ridiculous."

Even though he was thinking the _exact_ same thing, something inside him jarred at her words. He was irritated at her for being negative and he didn't want to hear anything like that now.

"Its only been three days." He answered halfheartedly. She nodded, looking out into the street.

"It just…" She sighed, scraping her left foot against the ground. He stared at her in dull askance. "It's strange."

"Yeah it's unbelievable-" he started but she shook her head.

"No, well yeah about all that but its just… the thing with Clarence was just a few months ago, and now this?" She looked at him with squinted eyes, her short hair blowing in her face. "Is it just a co-incidence? Its really weird. Like…mega weird"

He clicked his tongue; that was also exactly what he had been thinking. He asked Angeal about it, and his uncle had just said that they would concentrate on the search for the moment, but if this went beyond that then that would certainly be taken into consideration. Zack had then asked his uncle what his personal opinion was, and Angeal had reluctantly replied that the co-incidence was strong, but also said that the media coverage Cloud had suffered through may have made him a target to someone. The idea made Zack sick to his stomach, and he swore to fucking Gaia that if anything like that was the cause of this, he would hunt down every single reporter who had hassled the boy, and he would kill them.

"It could be." Was all he said to the girl. "I dunno. I just want to find him first, before asking questions."

"It's been two days," Yuffie's voice was high and she threw out her arms. "They haven't found a thing. We need to start-"

"Gaia Yuffie, just stop. They know more than you about this." His patience had run thin, and he didn't have the effort to feel bad for his words.

The girl seemed to wilt a bit at his chastisement and her cheeks flushed.

"I know." She said softly, "but they don't care like we do. There just stuffy men in suits who want to go home and drink beer and whatever else they like."

He felt his throat tighten at the words, and he though he may have been sick.

_They didn't care._

They didn't care. She was absolutely right. They may have been professional and they may have been genuinely working hard to find his friend, but at the end of the day when they returned home it would make no real difference to them whether Cloud was found or not. He hated them for that, even though it was unreasonable. He just wanted them all to realize what was at stake, he wanted them to know how important it was that Cloud was found. The planet couldn't continue without him. Everything had to stop. That's how it was.

"I know." He rubbed his forehead with his knuckles and sniffed heavily. "They don't care like us. But what can we do?"

"I don't know. But I'm looking all day today, and so are the others. We need people searching who care about Cloud. It's the only way. We're smarter than them mog-heads anyway."

"Gaia knows where he could be now though."

"Zack." She shouted in frustration, startling him. Her face was screwed up in distress as she stomped her foot on the ground. "Just…don't say things…Gaia."

He watched the small girl become upset with a morbid kind of satisfaction filling him up. That's what he wanted. He wanted her unhappy, he wanted her and everyone else to suffer as he was suffering. He didn't feel guilty, why the fuck should he? She had to be upset, everyone did. They would look harder if they knew what was at stake.

"Where's Angeal now?" She rubbed her nose with the palm of her hand and blinked the water from her eyes.

"He's at Shinra. Had to sort something out with work. He doesn't normally work on missing person like this. It's not military priority."

"Alright. It's good that he's helping though. We need someone like him. He's big and smart and really strong." He only just noticed how different the girl seemed, her clothes were plain, her face had no makeup on but it was her voice. Her voice was different. It was so much lower than it had ever been before.

"You seem different." He though aloud.

"Yeah, well so do you."

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Cloud dragged his hand across the carpet, feeling the fibers slide between his fingers. He shifted his bare knees beneath him, scratching them against the soft fabric. Sighing, he looked up at the door.

After his captor had left the night before he had made himself get up from the bed in order to explore the room he was evidently imprisoned in. He examined the walls, feeling their devastating hardness, he searched for a covered window, an air vent, anything that would link him to the outside world.

He found nothing.

This room was an inescapably box, and it gave Cloud the terrifying feeling of claustrophobia. There was only one way out of the room and that was the door. When he gathered up the courage to climb the stairs, he had ran his hands over the wood, realizing that it was just as sturdy as the blue walls. He pushed it, it didn't even shift indicating that it wasn't a regular house door, that it was several inches thick. He remembered the tears of frustration that gathered in his eyes as he pushed harder on the unwavering wood, he remembered the rapid beating of his heart as he paced around the room for almost an hour, examining every corner over and over again. It was no use though; he was trapped.

Finally he had let out an angry shout and collapsed onto the ground, he had wrapped his arms around his legs and sat there, just repeating the same mantra over and over again.

'He was going to be okay. He would be saved. He wasn't going to get killed. He was going to be okay.'

Eventually his eyes had grown heavy and he had laid down on his side, rocking himself on the carpet as he slowly drifted into a strange, dreamless sleep.

Opening his eyes that morning-if it was morning- was one of the most horrible experiences he had ever endured. Unlike the last two times he had woken up in this room, he was not confused by the color of the walls, nor the soft carpet. He knew exactly where he was and it scared him; he didn't want to know anything about this place, he wanted to at least have that small moment in the morning where he forgot where he was. Not having that depressed him and made him feel like he was accepting the situation, and that was something he_ never_ wanted to do.

He sighed and took his hands off the floor, placing them on his lap instead, resenting the feeling of the crisp linen. Pins and needles started to tickle his feet so he grabbed the wall and raised himself into a standing position. The blond gave a dull look up at the door before shaking his head and turning to the bathroom.

He tried to avoid the mirror as he turned on the tap and cupped his hands under it. He splashed the cold liquid on his face, wincing when some slid down his neck. He kept his eyes closed and grabbed a wash cloth from the rack beside him, covering his face with the fluffy fabric. He stayed still for a moment, keeping the material pressed to his face and breathing heavily. He wasn't crying, but he felt like it.

Eventually he decided to leave the small space, but his heart almost stopped because he walked out the door and instead of being greeted with blue and white, he saw black and silver and green. Sephiroth stood a few feet away from him, staring creepily and holding a tray containing a dish in his hands. As his surprise faded Cloud wondered briefly why he hadn't heard the other come in. It wasn't thought on for long as he watched Sephiroth look behind himself at the bed and then back to him.

He felt that dizzy, sick feeling every time he looked at the man. His mind couldn't comprehend the fact that General Sephiroth was holding him hostage. How could he believe it? It was ludicrous. He felt even more confused when he realized there was no other possible explanation, short of a nervous breakdown, for this whole situation.

"You didn't sleep in your bed?" The General stated in a questioning sort of way. Cloud shrugged and stared at him through lowered eyelids.

"It's not my bed." He replied back softly. Sephiroth's eyes narrowed for a moment before his usual smirk made it's first appearance.

"Cloud," he drawled out the name as though he had to speak slowly in order for him to understand, "everything in this room is yours. I've given it to you." The teen frowned as his kidnapper moved and placed the tray on the bed. He took the moment while the other's back was turned to look at the door, noticing with despondency that it was closed. How long did he intend to stay? He glanced back at the silver-haired man when he spoke again.

"I thought you might like some breakfast, Cloud." Sephiroth was acting as though he was speaking to a child. It angered him.

He had decided that morning, when he was trying to block out the depression that assaulted his mind, that he would attempt to stand up for himself more. It was hard; the other's presence was the epitome of intimidation, but he couldn't just cry and plead his way out of this. His captor didn't possess mercy apparently.

"I'm not hungry." He crossed his arms and looked to the side, trying to seem as together as he could on the outside, even though his insides were like jelly.

Sephiroth regarded the boy; noticing the little act he was trying to put on. It was endearing, really, that the boy wanted to fight him. Sephiroth had all the power here, there was nothing this child could do to get his own way so the whole thing was more amusing than annoying.

"You have to eat breakfast Cloud. It's the most important meal of the day." The mocking got him the desired reaction when Cloud turned sharply towards him and glared.

"S-Stop talking to me like that." The blond's hands were fisted and shaking.

"Like what?" He stayed calm which only annoyed the boy more.

"Like I'm five years old." Cloud took a breath after his outburst, he bit his lip when man began to approach him again in long, soundless steps. He tried not to back away as the large form shadowed him.

He felt all his anger fade away at the mans proximity, he wished he hadn't said anything, but at the same time he knew he had to act stronger.

He felt sick, he felt sick, he felt sick.

"I'm treating you the way you are behaving. Refusal to eat is a common trait of a five year old." Cloud made to move away but Sephiroth quickly placed his hand down on his shoulder, the force of impact making Cloud wince.

"Now," Sephiroth stared into his eyes, "will you eat?"

Cloud felt his face heat up at the others bullying, he felt humiliated and angry and he wanted nothing more than to scream at his captor. He had never been good with confrontation, and this was ten times worse than any playground bully or pervert he had ever had to deal with. Perhaps because he wasn't alone then.

Zack.

Tears welled up in his eyes and he looked down, his lip was shaking.

"N-no." He wouldn't give in to the others intimidation. He felt Sephiroth's hand tighten around him and closed his eyes tightly. It hurt.

Sephiroth grit his teeth, he didn't mind a little resistance but he found himself becoming furious at the refusal. Cloud wasn't allowed to deny him anything. Ever. He placed his other hand on the boys free shoulder, tightening both hands so they were close to that so very slim neck. His boy kept his eyes shut.

"Look at me." He ordered. Cloud ignored him so he growled, jerking his hands. "Open them." He repeated but Cloud still refused. He pressed his fingers in further, feeling the pulse.

"OPEN THEM." Cloud jumped in fright, opening his eyes and meeting with blazing green. He imagined what Sephiroth was like in battle then, lusting for blood. He must have seemed like a demon to his enemies. He wasn't a hero at all. It was all a massive deception.

Sephiroth calmed slightly when the blue orbs were revealed to him, he didn't mind that they were full of terror, because terror meant respect and Cloud would respect him. Always. He loosened his hold which was now more on the boys neck than his shoulders, but didn't remove his hands altogether. They seemed to remind the boy of his place.

"Now," he began in a much more controlled tone, "I don't want have to harm you Cloud, but I do not tolerate insolence. You will mind me." His stern voice silenced any objections the teen may have had and Cloud stayed silent and still, looking very shaken.

He stepped away from Cloud who just moved back a step, curling an arm around himself. Sephiroth knew the resistance was gone out of the boy for now. He grabbed Cloud's arm by the elbow and led him towards the bed. His bicep was thin, it actually took him aback for moment. He was so frail. Delicate. He loved him.

Cloud allowed himself to be dragged across the room and shook the others hand off before he sat down on the edge of the mattress. He looked down at the covered plate and then at Sephiroth as the other man sat across from him. The tray shifted slightly as the bed dipped beneath the muscular man's weight. Sephiroth held out his hand.

"Eat," he instructed. Cloud sighed and uncovered his plate, not saying a word to the man he increasingly loathed. The smell of eggs and meat wafted through the air and he looked to see that Sephiroth had made scrambled eggs and bacon for him. It was depressing that such a normal thing could exist in such an abnormal place. He felt a lump form in his throat at the familiarity of the dish. How often had he eaten this?

He tried to stop his mind-frame by looking at Sephiroth, but the man was turned away from him now.

"Have you used the television yet?" His captor asked as Cloud picked up his fork. He shook his head.

Sephiroth got up from the bed and walked over to the large television, turning it on once he reached it. Once the screen clicked to life he resumed his position on the bed, giving the boy a strange look.

Cloud had turned away from the television as he ate, he heard Sephiroth flick through some channels until he stopped on what sounded like Midgar news. Did that mean they were still in Midgar somewhere? He continued eating with his head lowered, not a bit hungry but afraid of what would happen if he stopped. It tasted like paint in his mouth.

Cloud had just finished his last bit of bacon when he saw Sephiroth look towards him and smile cryptically. He was about to question him when he heard his someone utter his name. It took him a few seconds to realize it was coming from the television. Eyes widening, the teen turned around and was stunned to see a picture of himself on the left hand corner of the screen where a newswoman was talking. The bacon fell out of his hand as he focused on what the woman was saying.

"_The search has commenced for missing teenager Cloud Strife. Authorities say that the fifteen year old boy was last seen by his mother before he left for school three days ago. The boy evidently never made it to school and hasn't been seen since."_

Clouds mouth opened without him knowing it. He barely noticed that his kidnapper stood up again and walked to stand beside him. He continued to watch as a map of his school route came up on screen before it switched to a close up picture of him. He remembered that picture, it had been taken the year before at a music festival he and his friends had gone to. He couldn't believe how happy he looked in it, now he couldn't believe he had ever felt happy at all.

"_There has been no word on the details of the boys disappearance. Authorities are urging anyone who may have any information to come forward. Riona Heartilly will be on location tomorrow night. _

He felt like he was going to pass out, his vision was funny and he couldn't think straight. Was that just a news broadcast about him? How could that be real? How could someone be sitting on a bed watching strangers talk about their kidnapping? Was this what it was like for other victims? He had watched so much stories like that one, how had he never thought about the fact that the victim might be watching them too? How had he been so naive and ignorant? It was too much; he couldn't breath. Was that him? Oh Gaia...

Sephiroth noticed the boys breathing become heavier, he clicked the television off and moved onto to the bed, his chest touching Cloud's back. Cloud was too distraught to notice the contact but when he wrapped his arms around him the blond became extremely tense.

Cloud snapped back to reality when he felt the others arms circle him. This was all his fault. This demon was keeping him here, keeping him prisoner. It wasn't fair! He had done noting to deserve this. How could this monster just decide to invade his life like this? He was a monster. He had no right to do this.

"Get off me." He screamed suddenly. The arms around him tightened as he began to move his torso in an attempt to get out of their grip. He pushed his elbows back, trying to wind the man but only succeeding in getting himself pulled back tighter. Feeling claustrophobic, he struggled harder, kicking his legs and twisting back and forth. But it was no good; Sephiroth was too strong. No matter what he did he just couldn't get him to move.

"I don't want to stay here. I don't…please, I don't understand what you want? What do I have to do?" He moaned, trying to free his arms by pulling them forward.

The struggling went on for almost ten minutes and by the end Cloud was exhausted, his face was flushed and he was covered in sweat, his chest rising and falling rapidly. Sephiroth, on the other hand, looked as though he didn't have a hair out of place as he held onto the boy, who was leaning as far away from him as he could.

Once he felt Cloud had lost enough energy, Sephiroth removed one of his arms from around the boy and placed it on Cloud's forehead. The boy struggled weakly, bringing up his free hand to try dislodge the invading limb, but was easily batted away. Sephiroth pulled the boys head back against his shoulder and began smoothing his hair back from his forehead in a horribly tender way that made Cloud's stomach twist. Cloud widened his eyes, not understanding and completely sickened with the ministrations. His skin broke out in goose bumps as the demon's hand smoothed over his scalp. He was completely uncomfortable with this, and had no idea how to deal with it, so he stayed completely still. To tense to even breath properly.

"You shouldn't get so worked up, Cloud." Sephiroth brought his lips close to the boys ear, feeling him trying to move his head away.

"How could I not?" Cloud whispered, taking a deep breath and trying to shift away again. He couldn't breath properly, this was too much. Too much, too much, too much.

"Please let me go, I-I wont tell anyone and…they're going to catch you anyway. Its best if…you do the right thing now." He had heard people on TV talk like that in these situations, it was the only thing he could think of to say. He felt like crying again when the man just chuckled. Always laughing at him. As if he were just an insignificant puppet.

"It really is best you accept the fact that you will _never_ leave." A certain viciousness entered Sephiroth's voice, as though he was saying the words for more than just Cloud's benefit. He squeezed the boy to himself tighter, ignoring Cloud's gasps of pain as he was half crushed by his inhuman strength. He buried his nose in the blond mass of hair hair, making him go stoic still. The smell, it drove him to madness.

Gaia, Cloud felt bile rise in his throat and swallowed thickly. What was the man doing? He was… touching him. He couldn't touch him like this. It was perverted. His mind couldn't catch up with the physicality of the moment, so it wasn't comprehending the other's actions properly.

"You will be mine forever," Sephiroth inhaled, his groin twitching at the scent. "You can watch the news every day, watch as they get further and further away from finding you." He chuckled, tucking a golden strand back behind his ear. "And then one day they'll just give up. You know they will. It is Midgar after all, how many sweet little children like you go missing every day?" He stopped talking so he could just bury his face fully in the spiky mass; it was glorious, he opened his mouth to take in more of Clouds scent, forgetting himself for a moment. He pulled him in tighter, desperate and carnal and so ridiculously satisfied that he had him with him.

Cloud didn't struggle as the other molested him. His mind was running over the words. He didn't want to hear them, believe them, but it was impossible not to do either. He felt a sadness creep into his being. A different sadness to what he had felt before, before it had been all about anger and fear and confusion, now he was starting to understand the hell he had plummeted into. He was trapped here, there was no way out of this. The other spoke the truth; children that went missing in Midgar were rarely found again, definitely not alive. Was that him?

With much effort Sephiroth finally pulled his face away from the blond, his eyes were slightly red and his mouth remained open as he caught his breath. He looked down at his boy and realized he was shaking severely, his eyes closed tightly. He sighed, thinking that perhaps he had gotten too bold again-he really didn't know himself to be so uncontrolled. He unwound his arms from the boy and moved until he was kneeling in front of him on the ground. Cloud looked down him emptily and he smiled back at him, taking a slack hand in his.

"I don't mean to upset you." He watched Cloud's brows furrow, "I just want you to know that you wont be leaving. Don't be unhappy now, it's a good thing. I know what your old life was like and I promise you that your new one will be much better." His words only upset Cloud more so he sighed and brought a pale hand to his lips, placing a kiss on the smooth fingers. The teen grimaced.

"I don't- Why do I have to stay here though?" Cloud pressed, having an idea of the answer but asking anyway.

"Because your mine. And I want you here." Sephiroth retorted simply, raising his voice an octave. Cloud huffed in frustration, pulling his hand back and holding it to his chest. Sephiroth could see the red mar around his wrist and reminded himself to bring some soothing cream for them.

Cloud wiped at his face and turned away.

"I don't belong to you. What does that even mean?" He muttered. Without another word his captor stood up. He gathered the tray in his hands and the plate that had fallen on the ground before looking at the boy who was pointedly facing away . He smiled lightly, realizing that this seemed to be the way all of his visits ended. He should probably attempt to change that constant.

"I'll be back with dinner. Understand this Cloud, what's happening to you now is good, not bad. You will see that eventually." He gave the solemn boy one last look before turning and leaving him alone.

Once the door slammed shut with its eerie finality, Cloud dug his hands into his hair, he tightened his grip until it hurt and he clenched his eyes shut. The teen pressed his face into his knees and let out a loud scream, not caring if his captor heard him or not. He didn't know what to do now, how would he get out of this? He felt so vulnerable, and useless and fucking pathetic. He screamed again into his knees, feeling slightly comforted at the release of pressure from his body.

"_Your mine"_

He screamed.

"_Your never leaving."_

He pulled his hair.

_Hands in his hair, smelling him. Molesting him._

He screamed again.

"_I love you."_

He pushed himself off the bed and onto the floor, landing with a thump. He continued to shout and scream as he pressed his forehead into the floor, tucking his knees tightly under him and keeping his hands caught in his hair. He felt so angry, so fucking angry that he was going to burst if he didn't get it out of him. How dare someone do this to him, and how could he just let it happen? What was wrong with him? Why wasn't he fighting back?

He was in a nightmare.

The hours passed, one, two, three, four, but he didn't move. He just lay there and hoped that he could wake up and be away from this hell soon.

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**Oh, all very tense and unhappy in this chapter. Poor everybody. **

**Sorry this update took so long, but I tried to get it out as fast as possible. My time is just taken up with college work and stuff so I do the best I can. Also, I'm not using a good document manager for this chapter because my old one expired, so if anyone notices some spelling and grammar problems I apologize for that. **

**You're reviews mean so much to me, and I LOVE hearing your comments and opinions so please leave one if you have the time. It's like my crack... seriously!**

**Thanks for reading, until next chapter...**


	18. XVIII

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

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Yuna got up that morning, put on her robe, walked to the bathroom and vomited.

She held her hand over her mouth as her body shook with the force of her retching. After ten minutes of trying to get herself under control she stood up straight again and looked in the small, rounded mirror. She looked exhausted; the paleness of her skin was testimony to the fact that she hadn't slept in over three days. She began wiping at her eyes but suddenly felt a pressure at the back of her throat once again. Moving quickly she lunged down and managed to reach the toilet bowl before the remaining contents of her stomach were forcefully brought up her esophagus.

She coughed and heaved for a few minutes until she felt secure enough to stand up again. The physical sickness faded from her stomach as she brushed her teeth and washed her face, the emotional sickness stayed on strong though. Would that ever leave?

Once she had washed up she returned to her room and dressed herself. It made her sad to slip on the tight white top and denim shorts because she wasn't sure how much longer would they fit her. Could she ever wear them again? She had always liked her body, and worked hard for it, now it was being taken away from her.

Her bottom lip shook as she tied off her shoes and walked over to her closet to take out her dancing stuff, thinking about the fact that thirteen years of training had all been for nothing. No one ever heard of a pregnant girl performing the Sending. It was impossible.

Utterly depressed, she packed up her shoes, furisode and ribbons.

She took a breath as she walked downstairs, stopping in front of the mirror to make sure her eyes weren't red and puffy. She always wore light makeup because she could see how awful it looked on some other girls in the daylight and wasn't sure how to apply it to herself without looking the same. She'd sweat so much during dance practice that it would just run off anyway.

She forced a smile on her face as she walked through her kitchen doors; her mother and father were seated at the table having breakfast.

"Hey sweetie, your breakfast is on the counter." Her mom said, picking up a teacup and taking a drink. She nodded and grabbed her plate, sitting down beside her father.

"You need a lift to school today?" He asked, seeming to be texting someone on his phone.

"Yes." Yuna answered softly. Her father looked at her and all but sniggered.

"Finally dump that Tie-dye?"

"Braska!" Her mother hissed, shooting her husband a chastising look. Yuna laughed and shook her head.

"No, he had training." She replied, mirroring her mother's disapproving expression. Her father closed his eyes.

"One can dream." He said dramatically.

"That's nice."

They ate their breakfast, talking about this and that, before Yuna and her dad had to leave for school and work. Braska kissed his wife on the cheek then followed his daughter out the front door.

Yuna felt a little put out by the fact that she would have to spend another day faking smiles and acting as though nothing was wrong. She stared out the window as she contemplated her situation. When would she tell Tidus? How would he take it? Would he dump her? What would everyone else think? Her parents…

She felt trapped.

"You're quiet." Her father stated, waking her from her daze. Yuna sat up and looked over at him, shrugging.

"I'm tired." She lied. She was sick of lying. Her father gave her a soft look before turning his eyes towards the road.

"Competitions are coming up soon aren't they? You shouldn't stress yourself over them. There are other more important things in life." Yuna felt like laughing at that. Oh, how she wished that dancing competitions were her only problem. More important things in life? Yeah, she got that now.

"I know." She answered softly. Braska looked at her again but then turned his attention towards the road for the rest of the journey.

Once her father dropped her off she made her way to the school door. She was so caught up in her thoughts that she only barely noticed the person in front of her. Tifa.

"Tifa." She called; secretly glad to have a distraction from her thoughts. She felt horrible about the fact that she was happy to talk to someone else who was miserable, and guilty that she founds her friends problem completely shallow in comparison to hers.

"Hey Tif." Yuna said, once she caught up to the girl.

"Hi." The other replied, Yuna saw that Tifa looked upset so she gave her a sympathetic smile.

"I heard about you and Zack. I was going to call over but you weren't in school yesterday so I didn't want to intrude." That was a lie, she spent the previous day locked in her bedroom crying and obsessing over her situation. She had hardly made it through school, so there was no way she would have been able to see anyone afterwards.

"I just needed some time to myself. Was he, uh, here?" Yuna focused on the other again, scolding herself for her lack of attention, she nodded.

"Yeah he was..." Tifa nodded back at her.

"How did he seem?" Feeling a little awkward, she clicked her tongue and thought of the best words to use.

"He was really quite actually; he looked like he was distracted or something." She pursed her lips as she looked at the others expression. Not for the first time she noted with jealousy how beautiful the girl looked, even in her sadness. It was a strange thing to be focusing on then but she couldn't help it. She was always jealous of Tifa's looks and that would only grow as her own diminished in the next nine months. Her stomach twisted.

"Oh, well we should head to class." She was glad for the suggestion, not comfortable with her mind-frame anymore.

Reno, Leon and Axel were already in the classroom once they arrived so they sat with them. The moment she sat down Yuna began sinking into her head again.

When would she tell Tidus? Should she do it soon or, maybe wait a while until she knew what she was going to do with the baby. She had already ruled out abortion; there was no way she could live with herself for doing that. Adoption maybe? She needed to talk to someone. That scared her even more; saying it out loud made it real.

"So," she idly heard Reno drawl in that menacing way of his, she didn't pay attention to anything else until…

"I hear you're single again."

"Reno!" She hissed. Insensitive idiot. She looked to Tifa but was entirely confused when she saw her give a genuine laugh, her eyes brightening up with mirth that wasn't there moments ago.

What did that mean? Were things easier to deal with once they were out in the open?

She looked at her friends. The earlier tension was completely gone now, Reno and Axel were bickering as usual and Tifa was smiling. It was like addressing the issue had dissolved it.

Would that work for her? Would everything seem easier and better outside of her head? Was the anxiety of keeping it hidden the only thing she was focusing on? Was there a positive side to all of this… her child? Could sh-

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sudden appearance of Yuffie at the classroom door.

"Yuf?" She asked, puzzled by the look of horror on the girls face. It looked so real, so sincere. Had she been diagnosed with diabetes?

"What's wrong?" Axel asked.

"Clouds gone missing."

Yuna's eyes widened.

It was out in the open. But it wasn't better.

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Cloud lowered himself to sit on the third step leading to the doorway. He sighed and stretched his two hands outwards, scratching his nails on the polished wood. He leaned back, his nerves alive with restlessness.

He had been here for six days now, six long, terrifying, confusing and depressing days in hell. He couldn't believe that in one more day he would have spent a week in this place, and he tried not to wonder how many more weeks he would have to be there. It was horrible. Everything was horrible. It was horrible how he refused to sleep in the horrible bed and instead spent horrible nights lying awake on the ground. It was horrible how even through all the fear and terror and horrible sadness he spent his days in extreme boredom, refusing to turn on the television; he would not participate in the situation he was forced into. It was horrible how his mind refused to clear, how he had to keep distracting himself from thinking about his life. However, all of it was nothing compared to the most horrible thing of all in this place.

Sephiroth.

The man, if that's what he was, visited him three times a day usually, each time with a plate of food and something to drink. He would offer Cloud the food and knowing that it was futile to resist, Cloud would grudgingly take it. Sitting himself against the far wall or on the bed and eating quietly and quickly, never tasting anything. Sephiroth would either stand or sit on his bed, watching him as he ate. Always watching. The longest the man had stayed with him was an hour, but even that was too long. Cloud would always try to calm himself but there was something about Sephiroth's presence that just unsettled his very being. Fortunately, nothing like the first few days happened again, Sephiroth had not touched him at all and usually just spoke to him for a while, Cloud giving only short and curt replies; he would have ignored him completely if he weren't so afraid of his dangerous temper. The man hadn't done or said anything else to harm or scare him, but it didn't matter because Cloud knew better than to trust the fake persona the obviously deranged man was using.

Sephiroth hadn't done anything to harm him physically, it was true, but every minute Cloud spent with the man the sickness in his stomach grew more violent. The way his kidnapper looked at him was terrifying, it was almost incomprehensible. There were no metaphors he could use for it because he had never heard or experienced anything to describe it. It was like he was trying to see into his mind, like he was trying to literally get into his body. It scared him; it made feel as though his very soul could be taken away at any moment.

It also scared him that this man was obviously not _just _interested in his mind. The way he had been forced to dress was proof enough that the man had some odd idea about keeping him vulnerable, but there was also the way he had behaved those first two days, holding and smelling his hair, trying to touch him any way he could. It was too terrifying to comprehend and Cloud felt like throwing up every time he saw the man run his eyes over his body, a distant, mad look in them. He was dreading the day his captor would act out his perverted desires. Gaia knew what it entailed, but the idea loomed over him like a vulture, perched in the corner of this room.

He no longer tried to convince himself that this was a nightmare or a figment of his imagination; he had accepted that he was really here, wherever _here _was, and that Sephiroth, the famous leader of the Shinra army and victor of the Wutian war, had kidnapped him. He didn't understand why or how it happened. Sephiroth had repeatedly divulged that he had been watching him prior to his abduction but Cloud didn't know if that was a ploy to scare him or if it was the truth. Every day it seemed clearer that his captor had been telling the truth, in those moments when they did talk Sephiroth mentioned things from his life that one couldn't possibly know. How would he know these personal things if he hadn't been watching him? The logical explanation was that he had in fact been stalked, but the idea shook Cloud so much that he was willing to hold on to any small bit of evidence that it wasn't true.

Then two days ago a horrible thought struck his mind. Cloud _had_ been stalked lately. Not by Sephiroth but by Clarence FitzGerald. The man who had contacted him under the guise of being his father, who had gained and betrayed his trust so devastatingly that it had become hard to live for a while. The man who had stalked him and obsessed over him, eventually killing himself because of him. Was it possible that he had had two stalkers at one time? Or was there something he didn't know about? It was all so unrealistic that he couldn't bring himself to even try and make sense of it properly. He was Cloud. He was a kid who went to school, hung out with his friends and hoped to go to College in a few years. These things didn't happen to people like him. It wasn't the way it happened.

He shook his head, yes, it was all just too unrealistic. He was becoming paranoid; isolation was getting the better of him.

He stood up and walked over to the bed, sitting on the end of it and fisting his hands on his knees. He couldn't stand it anymore, he needed more answers. It probably wouldn't change anything that had happened or would happen, but it might help sooth his mind.

One small comfort in a world of torment would be gladly appreciated.

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"FUCK OFF."

Zack slammed the door with a loud bang, not caring if it hit the reporter on the other side. Actually he did care; he hoped it got him right in the face. He scowled and walked further into the apartment where his uncle was waiting with Sky, who looked like she was one step away from a corpse at this stage.

"Sorry." He sighed, walking in and dropping himself into a chair. His muscles ached from lethargy and his head was pounding. Angeal cleared his throat and crossed his arms.

"Unfortunately there is nothing we can do about the rabble." He gave Sky a sympathetic look, waiving his hand towards the door. "I'm going to arrange for a guard to be stationed he-"

"Oh, there's no need for that. It's been decided that I'm going to be staying with Shera for a while." Sky interrupted with a weak smile, bringing her bony hand to her equally thin chest. "She insisted."

"That's good." Zack muttered. "You shouldn't be on your own." The pale woman nodded, giving him another tired smile. Angeal walked to the center of the room.

"I have gotten word." He began as they both looked at him with equally jaded expressions. "That a more internal investigation will commence in the morning." Zack just closed his tired eyes, nodding his head.

"I though so." He murmured. "What happens now?"

"Smaller teams will continue searching but the officials will begin an investigation into Cloud's background and other leads."

"Where would they even start?" Sky rubbed at her forehead, leaving a red mark there.

"They'll be focusing on the people around Cloud, and whether anything had occurred in the last few months which could give us a clue as to what had happened." Angeal answered patiently.

"Some of the reporters were asking… if there was a chance Cloud ran away. Will that be an angle?" Zack looked at his uncle with a raised brow. Angeal clicked his tongue, his features becoming tenser.

"Giving the circumstances it will b-"

"That's crap." Zack stood up quickly, holding his arms out in exasperation. "He didn't run away. You know Cloud wouldn't do that… They'll just be wasting time."

"They will be doing all they can to find him." Angeal said, giving his nephew a stern but not angry look. He was never angry at him anymore. "_I_ will make sure of it."

"You don't even work with the department... Really." Zack argued. Angeal tilted his head.

"There is very little a SOLDIER is not involved in." He said lowly. Zack just shrugged, looking down.

"You look terrible pet." Sky commented after a few minutes, he looked at her and felt irritated by her comment. Of course he looked terrible. Why wouldn't he?

"Have you eaten?" His uncle inquired.

"Yeah I had…something."

"A neighbor dropped in a cobbler earlier this morning. Thoughtful of her. Heat up a piece for yourself." Sky pointed to the fridge and gave him a coaxing look.

"I'm not hungry." He tried. She raised a brow and it killed him because she looked so much like her son with that expression.

"I won't hear any refusal Zachary." She said with a short huff. "There is no point in you getting sick. You're my biggest hope."

He obeyed her, not because he was hungry but because he didn't feel like getting emotional in front of them or saying something he would regret later.

As he opened the door to the fridge he began to indulge in the new and slightly morbid habit he had acquired. He took out different items and then checked their use by date so he could see whether they had been bought before Cloud disappeared or after. He didn't know why he did it, he guessed his mind was just overblown with the thought that when something as simple as a carton of milk was purchased, something so huge and life changing could happen before it was used up. It seemed so surreal. Everything he thought about was the same. He didn't know Cloud would be missing by the time a certain movie came out, or the next episode of something was on, or when he had to do the next class test. He was just there one minute and gone the next.

It was everything; everything reminded him of the boy, and that was why there was no getting past it. He had to find Cloud, because there was simply no other option.

"It's on the top shelf Zack."

He snapped out of his thoughts and retrieved the tin-foil covered dish. As it heated up in the microwave and the sickening smell assaulted his nostrils, he walked over to the kitchen window and looked out into the rainy city. His eyes narrowed when he spotted the group of reporters gathered in the parking lot. Vultures. They didn't care; they just wanted to make money. He wished they were dead.

The machine eventually beeped and he reluctantly looked away from the despicable sight, preparing himself to choke down the sickening food, as he pretended to be alive.

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Sephiroth slammed the paper bag down on the counter, licking his bottom lip and clenching his jaw. He looked towards the kitchen clock and practically growled, eyes narrowing in annoyance.

Idiots.

It seemed that no matter where he went he would be surrounded by incompetent insubordinates. How was it that every small, routine assignment was turned into a chaotic mess the _he _would always have to clean up? If they weren't mixing up the numbers, they were assigning the wrong people to the posts, or sending clearly unskilled fucking _children _to assist him. It was infuriating. Why was he even working with these people? He should just teach them a lesson and walk away. Oh, what would those Marlboro do then? Slither beneath him? Beg? That would be satisfying.

They didn't deserve this planet.

It was because of their impudence that he was only arriving home now, at one thirty in the morning. It wouldn't normally annoy him, but he hadn't given Cloud dinner or lunch so by now he would be starving. How dare they cause his boy to suffer? They should be worshipping Cloud, worshipping _him. _

He opened the bag harshly, taking out the Wutian food he had collected on his way home. The hot container didn't burn him as it would others when he carried it over to the next counter. He was abnormally loud as he took out plates and cutlery and transferred the hot food from its plastic containers into the deep wooden bowl.

He took a moment to remove his gloves and shake the snow from his hair before gathering the dish and heading for the boy's room. He had contemplated just leaving his charge for the night and giving him an early breakfast, but was worried that it was too long for him to go with nothing in his stomach. He was so small…

He felt some of the tension ease out of his body as he walked into the familiar warm, scented air. After almost a week, this room was starting to personify its owner, its colors and smell reminded him of Cloud. The room was Cloud.

He still felt small shivers of amazement when he thought about how long the boy had been with him. The past few days were the best he'd ever experienced. Even though he hadn't spent as much time with the boy as he would have liked, the thought that he had his little bird safe and locked away in its cage, kept away from everything else on the planet, was enough to make up for it.

His irritation returned when he turned on the light and saw the boy sit up quickly from where he had been lying by the wall. Cloud had seemingly taken to not sleeping in his bed, probably as a futile attempt at defiance. He hadn't commented on it yet, wanting his charge to get more used to the place in his own way and knowing that the room was warm enough to prevent him from getting sick. However, he now felt a pang of annoyance at the childish behavior.

"Foolish child, do you think that sleeping on the floor will do anything to help you?" He didn't bother to keep the disdain from his voice. The teen sat up straighter, and Sephiroth could see the tired eyes gaze at him warily. Cloud had been asleep.

He walked over to the locker and put the dish down. "I'm sorry for my tardiness." He mumbled, annoyed that he was forced to apologize for something that wasn't his fault. "I had to work late." Cloud didn't answer him, which was not unusual but irritating all the same. He turned to the boy and was surprised to see that he was standing up, staring at him with an oddly determined look set on his face. He narrowed his eyes in interest.

Cloud felt his heartbeat begin to speed up and he tried to get his voice to work. He had been waiting all day for the man to arrive, and had grown anxious and less brave as the hours passed. He continued to wait all day, surprised that the other didn't show with his food. Eventually he must have grown tired and let himself drift off to sleep on the floor.

Sephiroth was here now though, and he had to ask him. He had to find out. He took a breath, willing himself to be brave, and opened his mouth.

"I-I wanted to ask." He fiddled his fingers in front of him, keeping his eyes on the others face. "I- you said you were watching me. B-before this."

"Yes, haven't we been through this Cloud?" Sephiroth interrupted him, his eyes pinched at the corners.

"I know," Cloud answered, getting nervous. Sephiroth seemed different today. More angry. His face was hard and his eyes seemed to be glowing extra bright. "I just-before I…came here I was stalked by someone." He felt his cheeks flush at his inability to speak properly. He inhaled again. "Clarence..."

Sephiroth smiled. No…he grinned. He had wondered when Cloud would begin to piece things together.

Clever boy.

"I just…were you…involved?" Cloud was looking down when he said this, thinking about what he was saying and realizing how idiotic it sounded. There was no way the two incidents were connected. "I don't know if-" he was physically forced to stop talking as his heart jumped into his neck when he looked up to see Sephiroth smiling at him. It wasn't a normal smile though; it was a scary, evil smile that made his skin prickle. The man's eyes were wide and distant.

"Yes." Sephiroth said in a soft, eerie voice that floated through the room until it reached Cloud, sending goose bumps into his skin.

"Yes?" Cloud repeated shakily, not wanting to hear what he already knew. Why did he ask? Gaia, why did he ask?

"I was involved." Sephiroth replied. He thought back to the incident, pleasure pulsing through his blood. Was this his reward for going through such a terrible day? Would he be able to share his story with his boy so soon? He was pleased; Cloud was such a clever boy. He wanted to take him into his arms that moment so, so much.

Everything that Sephiroth was feeling, Cloud was feeling the exact opposite. Pleasure, happiness and excitement for pain, fear and dread. Sephiroth was involved. How involved? What did all this mean?

"How did you know Clarence?" He managed to ask, placing his hands restlessly against the wall behind him, not knowing why exactly he was doing it.

"Oh yes… Clarence. I didn't really know him. He was just an," he smiled at his boy. His love. His angel. "Unfortunate casualty."

_Unfortunate Casualty, _the word echoed inside Cloud's head. He furrowed his brows, biting the inside of his cheek. Clarence was…a bad man. A predator. Why would his captor make him seem like a victim of something? A victim of what? Everything was turned backwards in this place, heroes were villains, evil men were victims, and lives were nothing.

"What do you mean?" His need for the truth overrode his fear for a moment.

"I didn't enjoy killing him. But one has to make sacrifices in order to get what they want out of life." Cloud closed his eyes, feeling his body weaken. He didn't know what to do. Clarence had…killed himself. That's what the police had said. This was all jumbled. He didn't understand.

"You were watching me too?" He whispered, taking one of his hands off of the wall and putting it on his forehead.

"Too?" Sephiroth let out a laugh. "No Cloud. Clarence never even knew your name. It was just me." There was a savage need inside of him; he had to make sure the boy knew about what he had done. He couldn't stand the thought of him not comprehending how utterly, completely and obsessively in love he was with him.

He took a step forward.

Clouds eyes widened, he fisted his hands in his hair as he went through what he was hearing. Clarence never knew his name? No, that was wrong. Clarence had stalked him. Put him through hell.

"They found pictures in his house." He argued, feeling his vision become spotted.

"I put them there."

"And videos. Basch…"

"It was all me."

No.

No, no no,no,no, no. He couldn't breathe.

"I was the one who was watching. I was there, so many nights outside your window. I was at your school, at the park. I followed you everywhere for months and you let me. You welcomed me. You asked for this Cloud." As he drew closer the blond became more and more hysteric. Cloud looked as though he would fall over if the wall weren't supporting him.

"I didn't. I didn't want this. I didn't ask for any of this. I hate it here." Cloud kept his eyes shut, whispering more to himself than the man. He covered his face with his arm.

"You did Cloud. You hated that poverty. That life of sickness and scrounging. You wanted to leave. I'm answering your prayer."

"This is a nightmare." Cloud ignored the others sick words as best he could. It was hard. It was hard to have to keep defending himself from the man's hurtful words. He tried to open his eyes but there were white spots dotting his vision.

"No one loved you back there. They didn't appreciate you. That's why you cried wasn't it. Almost every night." Cloud shook his head, tears trying to make their way past his shut eyelids. He pressed himself into the wall when his captor stopped beside him.

"No." He whispered.

"Yes," Sephiroth drawled, "I know Cloud. You don't have to hide from me. I want to take care of you." Cloud clearly wasn't in his right mind, because when Sephiroth placed a hand slowly on his shoulder he didn't move or tense, he just kept his eyes closed and mumbled to himself. Sephiroth was pleased at the lack of resistance. He clutched the shoulder more tightly.

"If you just give in we can both be happy. Don't you want to be happy Cloud?" Cloud opened his eyes lazily. Did he want to be happy? Yes, that's all anyone wanted. Of course he wanted to be happy. Ever since he was a child he felt like there was always something stopping him from being happy. It would be so nice for that to stop. He just wanted to be happy.

Sephiroth turned the boy around and leaned down to his level, Cloud's blue eyes were open now but they were foggy and distant, he wasn't fully aware anymore. Perfect.

"I love you Cloud." He whispered, so close now that his breath tickled the white skin.

Clouds thoughts were hazy, he tried to comprehend the other's words. Love? Nobody loved him though. He was a burden. That's why he always felt lonely, that's why Zack choose Tifa, that's why his father left.

Zack. His father.

Clouds mind snapped back to reality a fraction of a second before he felt something against his lips. His eyes widened.

Sephiroth was kissing him.

He made a noise somewhere between a whimper and a scream in his throat as he tried to pull his head back. Sephiroth wasn't having any of his resistance though and he clapped a hand on the back of his head, using the other to hold him in place. The teen began shaking his head from side to side when he felt the man trying to pry his lips open with his own.

This was wrong. Kisses weren't supposed to feel like this. They were supposed to be pleasant and arousing, not sickening and claustrophobic. Sephiroth didn't love him; he wasn't able to love anyone. He wasn't saving him he was killing him. His lips felt cold and uncomfortable against him.

Sephiroth was not alive anymore. He had transcended to a new world. A world of pleasure and perfection. There was no way on Gaia the feelings he was experiencing at that moment could exist on such a miserable planet. Cloud lips were so soft, smooth. They didn't taste like anything else on earth; they tasted like Cloud. He felt his mouth water as he tried to get more of it.

He wanted more.

Cloud was screeching and shouting now, moving his head violently from side to side as he kept his eyes _and mouth _firmly shut. His stomach was churning and his eyes were shut so tight they were hurting. He couldn't breathe properly. It was disgusting. Sephiroth was disgusting. What was he doing? Why was he doing this? He fisted his hands and began to hit the others sides, lifting his legs and trying to knee the offender. He needed to get away. He couldn't breathe. He was terrified, he didn't want this. He knew what it would lead to. He was going to be sick. He couldn't believe it was happening.

If you had asked Cloud he would have said hours, but in reality it was less than a minute before Sephiroth allowed him to pull back and jerk out of his hold. Cloud had not expected to be let go so he ended up sprawled on the floor, his elbows supporting him as stared at the other in abject horror.

Sephiroth moaned softly as he licked his bottom lip, desperate for the taste to remain in his mouth. He smirked as he looked down at his boy. Shiva, he wanted him. Cloud looked so tempting, laid out before him, his hair ruffled and pretty lips swollen and red, the shirt clumped around his waist, revealing his thighs. The blond wasn't crying but his eyes were glossy and wide, staring at him with undisguised terror. He had never wanted anything more.

"Perfect." He drawled. He knew he was goading the boy but he couldn't help it, his reactions were so addictive. Everything about Cloud was addictive.

"G-get away from me." Cloud grit his teeth, he was shaking with fear and anger. His breathing was labored. "Pervert." He hissed, sitting up and wiping his lips harshly with his left hand. He felt his blood boil when the man just laughed at his words.

"You wanted me to do that." Sephiroth's voice was high pitched and sarcastic, as though he was speaking obvious truth and trying to explain it to him. Cloud shook his head, cheeks becoming red at his captors implications. He hadn't let him do that, he had surprised him. No, he had been confused, he was in shock. He didn't know what the other was saying or doing. That's why he didn't object. He was just confused.

"Get out." He said, trying vainly to sound stern. He closed his mouth and breathed heavily through his nose as he stared at his tormenter, ready to move if the he attempted anything like that again.

Sephiroth felt a spark of anger at the order. Was Cloud trying to tell him what to do? Did he think this room didn't belong to him as much as anything else in the house? It was laughable, so much so he didn't bother to object. He thought it was best to leave now anyway, he hadn't expected things to get so heated and knew that they both needed some time to calm down. His body was thrumming with want and it was dangerous for him to stay with the cause of this feeling any longer.

"Very well." He conceded, tilting his head slightly. Cloud looked away angrily, still wiping his lips and he smirked,

"It would be easier if you just gave in now Cloud." He was about to walk out the door when Cloud spoke.

"I will never give in to you." Always the same words. So empty.

"Oh," he muttered, "Wont you?" He left the room and locked the door behind him.

Once he was gone Cloud wasted no time in running to the bathroom and washing out his mouth with his toothbrush. Again, and again and again until his gums bled.

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**Hmm, slightly shorter chapter this time but hopefully you all liked it. Loved the reviews I got from you all last month and I really appreciate all of your kind words and support. I'm also noticing that a lot of you are really into how evil Sephiroth is in this fic and I have to say it's a little scary... but I totally understand. Dark characters are always the most interesting. **

**As always its the reviews that inspire me to write so please drop me one if you liked the chapter or if you want to offer me some constructive criticism. **

**See you next month!**


	19. XIX

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

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"_Open your eyes coz another day is dawning_."

She sighed, blearily forcing her lids upwards. The harsh light made them fall back down again as she rubbed her nose.

"_Children of the night can you hear the-"_

"Yuffie, turn that stupid thing off!"

She snapped into a sitting position and made a face at her sister Sasame, who was invisible beneath the large pile of red bed-covers. She widened her eyes mockingly and slowly hit the stop button on her alarm radio, raising her hands and wobbling her head once the music had ceased.

"Have to get up anywayyyy!" She cooed, pushing the bed-covers back and hopping up off the mattress. She wasn't tired anymore. She shivered a little when the cold air blew around her bare legs and arms.

"Huhhhhh, so cold." She groaned, pouting. The now energized girl skipped out of her room and down to the bathroom she shared with her sisters, glad to see it was empty. For a change. She allwaaaaaaaaays had to wait the longest.

She did her morning business, showered, dressed and brushed her sparkling white teeth. Once that was done she reached under the sink and took out a pink, spotted makeup bag.

She scowled at the almost empty container of blush. Stupid Sera must have used her own one up again. Concealer came first, followed by foundation and then eye shadow. She applied liberal amounts of eyeliner to her eyelids before taking out sugary lip-gloss and smothering a large amount on her lips. Yum, tasted like a lollipop. She wanted a lollypop.

She smiled at her reflection, thinking she looked quite cute. Not pretty like Tifa or Yuna, but…cute. Her smile faltered a little but then she reminded herself that she was soooooo much cooler and better at being an awesome ninja than Tifa or Yuna.

"Yuffie get out!" She narrowed her eyes at the insistent banging on the bathroom door. Why did they all have to share? It was so annoying and…unhygienic. Like really, it was unhygienic wasn't it? All the creepies and bacteria.

"Yuffie."

"Okay, okay!" She shouted back, huffing and stomping towards the door. She pulled it open forcefully and glowered at her older sister, Sera.

"Oh nice makeup." Her sister sneered, giggling. Yuffie ignored the twinge of embarrassment rolling up from her chin and walked past the other girl.

"Nice boob job." She giggled, puffing her chest out and laughing. Her sister just raised a brow.

"At least _I_ don't look like a prepubescent boy." That stopped her laughing and she huffed again, not saying anything else as she made her way down to the kitchen.

Her mom and dad were busy putting things on the table for breakfast as she sat down sulkily in her chair. Stupid Sera and stupid bathroom.

"You could help." Her mother pointed out as she balanced three plates in her hands. Yuffie puffed her cheeks and pointedly folded her hands. Her mother scowled at her.

"What's wrong with you now?" Yuffie sighed.

"Sera called me a prepub- something boy." Her father let out a laugh.

"Godo!" Her mother hissed and then she smiled warmly at her daughter. Yuffie smiled back for a moment.

"Don't listen to her Yuf, she likes to-"

"Mom," Yuffie's smile disappeared as her mother stopped talking to look towards the kitchen door. Sasame stood there, half dressed and holding a shoe in her hand.

"Have you seen my other trainer?" Sasame annoyed Yuffie when she used her baby voice to get her way with her parents. They always coddled her because she was the runt of the family. Uh, she wasn't even cute. Annoying brat.

"Okay, let's go find it then." Her mother cooed, going all googely eyed. "Yuffie can you finish setting up here?" The small girl moaned, causing her mother to frown.

"Alriiiiight." She conceded, lifting herself up slowly and gathering the rest of the plates from the counter before setting them down the table. She walked back beside her dad and opened the drawer to take out the cutlery.

"Are we still not talking?" Godo asked, nudging his daughter.

"Are you still gonna do it?" She countered, shaking her shoulders. Her father sighed.

"Yuffie, the house will make a lot to us as a tourist attraction. Your grandmother doesn't mind."

"I mind." Yuffie snapped, turning away from her father and setting the cutlery harshly on the table.

"Don't take that tone with me miss." The robust man said sternly. She stuck out her tongue, making a face at him behind his back.

"Father I need some Gil for the club today. The girls and I are going for lunch." Sera strutted into the kitchen, as though it were a red carpet and she a famous celebrity. Yuffie rolled her eyes at her. All boobs and no brain.

"Why don't you and the _gurls_ get a job?" She mimicked her sister's haughty tone. It was ridiculous; there was no way she would live at home at twenty-seven years of age. Uh, she was out of here the minute she was eighteen, off to become the worlds best ninja.

"Why don't you get a girlfriend?" Her sister snipped back.

"Girls." Their father warned. Yuffie could hear her sister smiling saccharinely. She felt like gagging.

"Sorry father." Sera drawled.

"Alright here's a few hundred Gil." Godo, as usual, conceded to his eldest daughters demands. Yuffie would usually complain about the unfairness but she wasn't talking to him anymore. Ever, ever again.

A half an hour later the whole family was sitting down for breakfast, including Yuffie's grandmother who had moved in with them lately due to health issues, forcing Sasame to have to move into Yuffie's room. She loved her grandmother but that was still so annoying.

"So do you have training today?" Yuffie's grandmother, who had been one of the first females in her country to train in Kendo, questioned.

"Yeah," the girl beamed, stuffing a piece of fish into her mouth. Her grandmother's proud smile warmed her insides.

"Obian tells me you're the best in the class." She opened her mouth to reply.

"Ugh, so what, It's not like she's ever going to need that in her life." Sera commented, cutting her off short.

"Keep your comments to yourself." Kisamu muttered to her eldest daughter. Sera narrowed her eyes.

"_She_ never does." She pointed to Yuffie.

"That's because I'm always right." She grinned and stuck out her tongue. Kisamu sighed.

"You guys are silly." Sasame cooed, smiling at them smugly. Yuffie scrunched up her nose.

"So are you." She smirked. Her sister laughed.

"You just admitted you're an idiot. Ha ha!" Yuffie felt her cheeks flush. Damn, caught in a trap.

"At least you were right about something."

"Sera!"

"Shut up."

"Yuffie!"

"Can you two ever stop fighting?"

"She's a retard."

"She has no life"

"Girls." Godo silenced them all with his booming voice.

The rest of the meal passed with Yuffie and Sera sneaking dirty looks at one another, while Sasame smiled at them mockingly.

After she was done she went upstairs to get her school bag. Once in her room she closed the door and got on her knees. Stretching a hand underneath her bed, she caught hold of the handle of the trunk and pulled it out.

It was her treasure box! Piles and piles of candy greeted her when she opened it, sweets, lollipops, chocolate, sherbet whips and everything yummy. It was also where she stored her other, more secret treasure.

With narrowed eyes the girl pushed aside the plastic wrapped treats and revealed the white cloth they were resting on. She pulled the corner of the material back, gently so as not to disturb what lay beneath. There they were, all gleaming in a multitude of transparent colors; cerulean, emerald, amber, scarlet, baby-blue and so on, all sitting quietly beside one another like a nest of fairy eggs. Their shine, not even spurred by the magic they possessed at that moment but still as luminescent as the sun, reflected on her; on her skin, in her eyes, in her chest, in her heart, in every part of her small body. It made an unexplainable rush of pleasure course through her and she smiled, reaching out a shaky hand to follow the curve of one of the orbs gently, as though it really were a cloud. She had over thirty balls in this chest now, and almost every type. But she needed more.

When her mother called her name from downstairs she quickly pulled out a handful of candy and stuffed it into her schoolbag before closing the trunk and locking it with her secret code.

She didn't feel bad for taking it though, those people didn't even want it. And it cost soooo much in the shops. They deserved to have it stolen!

Yuffie walked the fifteen minute journey to school with her younger sister and once they arrived they went their separate ways, mumbling quick goodbyes to each other. Yuffie made her way to her classroom, saying hello to everyone she passed. She was so popular!

She smiled at a cute boy who passed while waiting for her phone to turn on fully. Her face scrunched up in confusion when she saw eight missed calls from Zack, all at crazy hours of the night.

She took out a lollipop from her bag and was un-wrapping it with one hand while she held the phone to her ear with the other, waiting for Zack to pick up.

The phone rang about seven times and just when she was about to hang up she heard the line connect and Zack's voice come through.

"Zack. What's with all the calls huh?" She questioned, sinking into an empty classroom in order to hear the other better. "You finally realize you loooooooove me?"

"Yuffie…" Zack's voice sounded jaded and dull. He was so hung-over.

"Um,"

"You haven't heard from Cloud, have you?" Zack's voice really, really low. She furrowed her brows. Why would he ask that?

"No, Zack what's going on?" She felt her heartbeat begin to speed up; something was wrong.

"I can't…We can't find Cloud." Her eyes widened and she let the lollipop fall from her mouth to land on the ground, the hard candy smashing to pieces against the tile. They couldn't…find Cloud?

"What do you mean? Where…" She didn't know what to say, it was…strange.

"He's gone, since yesterday morning I think. The police and Angeal are looking for him. It's bad Yuffie." Her stomach dropped as goose bumps broke out on her skin. She felt cold. Cloud was missing?

"What…"

"I have to go Yuffie. I'm helping to look for him." Zack hung up without another word and Yuffie was left standing with an empty line buzzing in her ear. She nodded and lowered her phone, feeling tears pool in her eyes.

Cloud was missing. That wasn't possible. He was her friend. One of her best friends. People who went missing in Midgar were never found again, Cloud wasn't missing.

She let out a sob and put her hand to her mouth. Was this a joke? It had better be a joke. But…Zack wouldn't joke about that. Cloud was important to him. She needed more information.

She calmed herself down and wiped her eyes, not caring that the eyeliner was smudging across her temple. She had to leave, she had to help them. She grabbed her bag and was just about to head for the exit when she thought of her friends. They would probably want to know, and for some reason she wanted to tell them. Share the sadness. She walked rapidly through the halls until she reached the older year's homeroom. She stopped at the door to take a breath and saw that Tifa, Reno, Axel, Leon and Yuna were in there.

"Yuf?" She heard one of them say.

"What's wrong?" Axel or someone said. She took a breath, not wanting to have to say it.

"Cloud's gone missing."

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"Cloud, this is…" Sephiroth rubbed his eyes with his thumb and index finger, bringing them in to meet at the bridge of his nose. He laughed softly, frustrated but amused by the situation.

Cloud pursed his lips, tucking his knees more firmly under his chin. The small movement jolted his numb lower half but he didn't care to make himself more comfortable. The moment the man left the night before he had barricaded himself in the small bathroom, comforted by the fact that it was lockable. Even though it was a meager defense it was the only comfort he could find in the impossibly claustrophobic space he was confined to. The bathroom was cold and white and hard. His thoughts had bounced off the sterile walls for the whole night, combining with un-satiated lethargy to effectively drive him mad. He didn't care though, because as bad as this place was, it was a lot better than being out there with that… man.

The blond closed his eyes as images of the night before assaulted his mind, he had to swallow the sickness in his stomach, and will his thoughts away by sheer mental force. He hated that man, hated him with all of his heart, and he didn't want him to touch him, let alone…kiss him. He cringed. His worst fears were confirmed last night, this man's interest in him was definitely sexual, and a simple kiss, as awful as it was, was only the beginning. Someone wouldn't stalk, murder, kidnap and _kill _for just a kiss. No, Cloud was not new to sexually aggressive people and he knew the look in his captors eyes the previous night, he wanted sex. He wanted sex with him.

Cloud covered his eyes with his hands, grinding his teeth. There was nothing on Gaia he could do to stop Sephiroth from getting what he wanted. Honestly, he was just a boy, a child, and Sephiroth was…Sephiroth.

He wouldn't give in without a fight though; there was no way he could willingly participate with anything this man wanted from him. This monster…who had deceived him in the most terrible of ways. Who had hurt him. Who had gained his trust. Who had betrayed him. When he thought of what his captor had done to him, pretending to be his father, raising his hope like that, it was just so mortifying. How could he…it was too horrible to even think of. If there was one small, small comfort in the whole thing with Clarence it was the fact that the man who had deceived him had died, bringing everything he had told him with him. Now he knew that it was Sephiroth he had told those things to, and he was humiliated. How could he have been so stupid? Why had he opened himself up to someone he wasn't even sure was his father?

He hated Sephiroth so much.

Sephiroth blew some hair out of his eyes as he tapped his fingers along his risen knee which was bent towards his chest. His left leg was stretched out in front of him as he leaned his back against the bathroom door his cherub was currently hiding behind. It was honestly too endearing to be angry at, Cloud was like a scared child, cowering beneath his blankets as if it would save him from the monster in his room. Well, as Sephiroth had learned when he himself was young, one couldn't hide from their fears but would eventually have to face them.

"Why don't you come out here and talk. Just talk, I promise." He sighed when he was offered no answer, pitching his head backwards to knock against the painted wood. Well, he was lying anyway, after the night before there was no way he would be content with just oral communication anymore. He hadn't meant for the kiss to happen so soon but he was glad that it had. Now, he and Cloud could move further into a relationship as lovers. Sephiroth knew the boy was afraid of him, but he would just have to teach him not to be. He would teach him to love his touches and kisses. Then they could really be together. He knew what the boy was feeling; he himself had been quite skeptical of such acts, before Genesis had shown him how enjoyable they were.

He looked up at the ceiling and laughed lightly. Perhaps Cloud did have good cause to be scared. His own experience was intimidating enough, but they were the same age and what could be called acquaintances so there was a familiarity to the whole ordeal, whereas Sephiroth was much superior to Cloud in both age and life experience, and still a stranger in many ways.

"Alright," he conceded, "I've left food on the bed for you and if it is not eaten when I return tomorrow I'll take it as a punishable offence." He got to his feet and knocked on the door twice, "Understand?" No reply, but he was sure he heard hitching breath. He chuckled again at the ridiculousness of the situation before turning and heading up the stairs.

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The flickering above him made Zack tilt his head upwards to where the green street lamp was going through its last few hours of life before the Mako supply was cut off and the bulb would have to be replaced.

The dark haired teen sighed, letting his gaze fall forward again to look at the gloomy spectacle of an abandoned street painted in shades of sickly green and grey. It was late, probably after one in the morning, and Angeal had already called several times telling him to return home. He had long since shut off his phone, simply unable to face the return journey to his empty apartment. Empty, empty, empty.

He inhaled, feeling an ache grow behind his eyes that made him want to dig his fingers into his sockets to get at it. Instead he just rubbed at his forehead and let out a soft growl. How was he going to do this? He just couldn't stand it any more. It was bearing down on him more and more every day and he was starting to stagger under the strain.

He inhaled deeply and, with a force of strength one might apply to the task of pushing a boulder uphill, he made himself move on, his hands tucked in his pockets as he walked the glum streets, his eyes were weary but alert as he scanned every nook and cranny for what he knew by now wouldn't be there. In order to distract himself his mind wandered back into his memories of happier times, times before everything seemed to fall apart before his eyes like crumbling ash.

"_Zack!"_

_The teen raised a brow in question when upon entering the house he was instantly greeted with a very flustered looking Yuna. _

"_Yeah?" He replied, looking at her in confusion. _

"_It's Reno's fault. I had no control." The girl said, pushing some of her waist length mousy hair over her shoulder and holding her hands up in front of her. He was about to ask her to explain when a shout coming from a different room in the house cut him off._

"_Yeeeeeeeeah… that's how ya do it."_

"_Aw, is everyone having fun without me?" He questioned, placing his hands on his hips._

"_Definitely," she replied dryly, turning and waving a hand for him to follow as she walked through the main hall and then past the kitchen. A few of them had decided to meet at Yuna's house for a small get together, celebrating nothing other than the fact that her parents had gone on a trip out of the city and for the first time ever had left her alone for the weekend, only arranging that her aunt would visit during the day. Everyone had already been here a good three hours, but Zack was arriving late because he had had to go by Shinra headquarters to drop a file into Angeal and then ended up spending longer there than he meant to. He couldn't bring himself to regret it though, because he had gotten to witness a rare training session with Angeal, Sephiroth and some grunts. It was pretty impressive; he was only sorry that Cloud hadn't been there too. He could imagine the boy's reaction to watching his hero in action. He'd probably melt into the ground, and then Zack would have to clean him up. _

_His thoughts cut short; Zack was torn between screeching in horror and erupting in a fit of laughter at the sight that greeted him upon entering the main living room of the house. _

_All of his gang was there, plus one or two people he didn't know too well and they were sat around the room on the couches which had been arranged into a sort of semi-circle. Everyone had a bottle or plastic cup in their hand, and everyone's attention was directed towards the scene in the center of the circle._

"_Cloudy!" Zack exclaimed; his eyes rounding and his bottom lip falling open in a gesture that was only partly contrived. The blond didn't even look up from where he was sitting cross-legged on the floor with a line of small shot glasses standing at attention before him on the low coffee table, one of their comrades clutched in his hand as he emptied it into his mouth. A snickering redhead looked up from his place beside the blond and when his glazed eyes caught sight of Zack his grin almost split his face in half. _

"_Fair!" He shouted and Cloud, alerted by the word, looked up and set his bubbly eyes on him as well. "Yer little boys just become a man tonight, ya should be proud." Reno continued. Zack wasn't really listening to him though, his gaze was fixed instead on the blond smiling in a very un-Cloud like manner at him. The blonde's eyes looked like puddles of rain water half hidden behind heavy lids and his lips were slack and partly open. He had one hand placed on the table in front of him and seemed to be resting a good portion of his weight on the limb. _

"_Zack," he said slowly, as though the words were all trying to get out at once and he had to make an effort to arrange them properly. "You're… very late."_

"_It seems so, Cloudy… but ya haven't missed me too much, huh?" He said, and the blond shook his head vehemently in response, holding a finger up in the air. The glass fell out of his hand and onto the carpet. _

"_I did," he said loudly, and then he lowered his voice to a normal level. "I did but then Reno and…or… gave me a green drink called um… what was it…" He turned slowly to the redhead who grinned and patted him on the shoulder._

"_Cloudys a fuck'n tank." He said, seemingly ignoring the question. "The kids been shoot'n it down all night. An you said he aint no drinker." His multi-hued eyes quickly narrowed in mistrust. The redhead was a volatile drunk. _

"_Well he wasn't before tonight but I see that that's," Zack scratched his head, walking further into the space, "changed."_

"_He's gonna be sick if he keeps this up. He's mixing too many drinks." Yuna informed him from where she had taken a seat beside a blond boy whose name escaped Zack. He nodded._

"_Why were you so late? Like… the whole night late." Cloud held his arms out in front of him, seemingly to show the distance. His eyes were round in a way that Zack couldn't help but find funny._

"_Sorry kiddo, got held up at home." He explained, crouching down beside the center table._

"_Not a kid," Cloud mumbled, his attention drawn down at the table and its contents. "See," he waved his arm lazily, his head looking floppy like a ragdoll's. "Reno?"_

"_Nah, ya aint a kid now," the redhead agreed and then reached to pick up one of the small glasses filled with something blue. "Another!" He declared._

_Before Cloud could imitate him Zack reached forward and caught his slim wrist, pulling it backwards, a safe distance from the table. It took a few seconds for the younger boy to realize what had happened, and once he did he snapped his head around to glare at him. The anger was marred by the slackness of his features though._

"_Hey!" He said, pulling his arm. "Stoooop Zack. We have to do five in a row or I'll loose. Don't wanna lose." He said, shaking his arm._

"_Oh Cloudy, you're about to lose a whole lot more than a game." Zack muttered, looking around at the others and shaking his head. They all gave him sheepish looks in return, clearly unable to hide their amusement at the spectacle._

"_Huh?" Cloud was perplexed. "no its okay, they're really really nice, you should have one too. Not two, one toooooo. Like, aswell. As me."He looked back at the table again, his mouth moving in silent speech. A moment later he started laughing, looking back at him in delight. "One two. One two. Ha, ha." _

"_Uh…" Zack scratched at the back of his scalp. "Well, why don't we go for a walk instead…?" The blond stopped laughing and looked at him, confused again._

"_Why were you sooooo late Zack?" He questioned._

"_Come on, I'll tell ya on the way." He said cheerfully, reaching out his hand. The blond contemplated it for a long few seconds, looking like a mouse skittering around a trap, unsure whether to take the risk. Eventually he smiled and caught the limb with his own smaller digits._

_It took a clumsy few minutes to get the blond safely on his feet, and even then Zack took on most of his weight in order to stop him from diving forward. He frowned a bit, looking down at the empty glasses and bottles on the floor and wondering how much of their contents now rested in his friend's stomach. He wasn't being over-protective; this was Cloud's first time to drink alcohol and his body wouldn't know how to handle too much of it. Plus, the boy was almost comatose at this stage while the rest of the small group, sans Reno, was relatively sober. _

"_You should have cut him off earlier," he said to them, shifting Cloud's weight a bit and maneuvering them to face the door._

"_We didn't know," Leon murmured behind him, "Reno had him out in the back porch and when they came back he was like that. He's in for a rough night."_

"_Oh great, Cloudy puke's gonna get on my T-shirt isn't it?" The raven haired teen pouted, looking down at his torso in mock-mourning. _

"_As long as it doesn't get on the carpets and quilts," Yuna intoned saccharinely, giving him an apologetic but meaningful look. "You can take the room at the bottom of the hall."_

"_Okay," Zack nodded._

"_Why are ya tak'n him," Reno whined, scowling at the group. "He's the only one a ya that's any good."_

"_Don't worry Reno, I'm gonna kick you're ass for this tomorrow. When you can really feel it. Night all." Zack said in an upbeat tone, giving them a small wave._

"_Aren't you going to come back down? When he's asleep?" A soft voice spoke up and he looked over his shoulder to where the dark haired beauty that was Tifa Lockhart stared back at him with a slightly hesitant look, as though she wasn't sure if she should have spoken. He smiled kindly._

"_Nah, I think I'm gonna stay up in case he gets sick and like… chokes on himself," he grimaced, shifting the very slack blond again, "Huh Cloudy, the things I do for cute blondies." He murmured, a small smile spreading across his face. _

"_Blondieeeeeee," the boy slurred, reaching up to his face but then letting the hand fall back down a second later._

_Within a half of an hour Zack managed to get the boy up to the en-suite guest bedroom they would be occupying for the night, out of his trainers, navy sweater and denim baggy jeans and tucked in between the silken sheets of the large bed. _

_He sighed; looking down at the sleeping boy who seemed all of five years old huddled up in the huge bed, and then began to remove his own boots and jacket. He hesitated for a moment, wondering if it would seem weird to the others that he chose to stay up here with his unconscious friend instead of joining them downstairs, but when Cloud shifted a bit, bringing his hand up close to his forehead on the pillow, he decided that he really didn't care._

"_Well buddy, you're in for a spanking tomorrow I'll tell you that," he muttered as he rolled onto the bed, making the whole thing shake loudly. He looked at the boy as he pulled himself in between the sheets. "Well, I guess I'd be a hypocrite to be too mad. So maybe I'll forgive you, just this once."_

_He smiled, bringing his hands to rest behind his head as he stared at the ceiling. _

"_In fact, I'll be extra nice and show you all the secret hangover cures. You're gonna need them. It consists mostly of really greasy, meaty food, about five potions and pizza. Oh yeah, we're gonna get Pizza with like everything on top. And a whole day of crap TV. It'll be fun." _

_He looked over at the boy and chuckled, reaching out to ruffle his feathery hair. _

_A half an hour later Cloud woke up and with little warning purged his stomach out onto the carpeted floor. Zack got him to the bathroom as quickly as possible, and for the next two hours stayed with the miserable boy as he raved on about random stuff between bouts of retching. _

_Eventually they did get to sleep, and woke up late the next morning. Cloud was as sick as everyone predicted but that took second place to the mortification he suffered because of his actions. It took Zack almost a full hour, in which he received several death glares and two dead arms, to convince him to leave the bedroom and face his friends and when he did he could hardly keep his head up. He apologized to Yuna for the carpet and though she was stressed she was pretty decent about it. They had breakfast and left, as per Cloud's wish, as quickly as possible. Not before Zack gave a very ill Reno a couple of good punches._

_True to his word, Zack spent the whole day with Cloud at his apartment, binging on junk food and watching movie marathons. The blond perked up after a while, seeming to come to terms with the fact that his ordeal was something everyone went through once in a while. It was a good day, and even though Cloud made it a mission to never drink like that again, it was one they repeated several times in the following year and a half, where usually Zack would be the one in dire strife. _

He didn't realize he was smiling, but once he did the expression fell from his face as water began to sting his eyes. He inhaled deeply, stopping and looking around himself. The place was still empty, not a soul around. He looked up at the sky, where the moon was mostly hidden behind a cloud of smog.

Cloud had been just fourteen then, a young age to start drinking but older than he himself was. Midgar children were creatures of the city, they didn't grow up the way other children did and Cloud was no exception, though Zack often tried to make him one. There was a feeling in the city that if one didn't act quickly they wouldn't live long enough to experience everything they could, a pessimistic thought, but one that Zack now found to be proved bitterly true.

It really was late now, he would have to go home soon; it wasn't really fair on Angeal to stress him out. Even as he thought that though, he realized how dispassionate and devoid of guilt he felt. It was like he wasn't capable of feeling anything anymore except sadness and sickness, as if he'd been hollowed out. He could remember what it was like to feel things, happiness, joy…but they were just memories.

Were memories all he had now?

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Cloud jolted awake at the sound of something banging. He blinked, trying to clear his fuzzy vision but unable to. Confused, he made to open his mouth only to realize his tongue was heavy and felt like cotton wool.

"Wha…" He lifted his head from what he gathered was the carpet. Strange; he didn't remember going to sleep. His heartbeat sped up when his head dropped back down to the floor. He couldn't lift himself. He felt too weak. Nausea gripped him as he began to panic. Why did he feel so weak? What was wrong with him? The teen began hyperventilating, moving his hand and legs uselessly, reminiscent of a fish out of water.

"It's alright." He widened his eyes and looked up to see a black, fuzzy silhouette standing beside him. Sephiroth.

"Wh-" he became frustrated when his tongue wouldn't work and began to make noises with his throat, fisting his hands weakly on the carpeted floor in an attempt to gain leverage. The room was dark, clearly the lights had been turned off, and all he could see was the shadow of the man, with his glowing hair and eyes.

Sephiroth regarded the squirming figure on the ground; he didn't smile or smirk, just stared with a plain expression. He didn't like to have to drug his boy, but it was the easiest way to get him out of the bathroom without having to resort to violence.

"Relax," he said softly, slowly kneeling down so he could see the boy's face more clearly. Cloud's slightly foggy gaze moved to him, wide and full of fear. The blond was moving his mouth, trying to say something. His face was pale and his lashes were like bruises against his cheeks.

"In a few minutes the drug will clear enough that you'll be able to speak again," He explained softly.

Cloud knew his kidnapper was talking but he couldn't make out what he was saying; it sounded like he was under water, his ears felt blocked. His breath got even more rapid as fear and claustrophobia gripped him.

Sephiroth kneeled back and waited for the blond to regain his senses, fiddling with a loose nail as he did so. It had broken during a fight with a Guard Scorpion earlier.

After another few minutes Cloud's eyes began to clear more and his mouth started to feel normal, much to his relief. He moved his head against the carpet, glad to see that his ears were becoming less blocked. His breathing slowed as the claustrophobic feeling left but he was nowhere near relaxed because his body still felt as weak as newborn's. He waited a few more minutes but his arms and legs remained heavy. His breathing sped up again.

"Wha-t did you do?" He asked desperately, trying to lift his arms. He looked around the dark room, and his stomach coiled much more at the strange miasma lingering in the air. Sephiroth leaned forward.

"Just a harmless drug, I put it in your food." Cloud felt like screaming at the man's nonchalant tone. Just a drug? He had drugged him, and he didn't think anything of it? Why? Why did he do it?

"Why?" He realized he was slightly begging, and he felt strangely hysterical, as though he had no control over his emotions.

"Perhaps I wanted to spend some time with you without a door between us." Sephiroth smiled at his joke, Cloud just closed his eyes and clenched his jaw.

He snapped them open again when he felt himself being rolled onto his back, looking up into the man's face. He tried to turn his head but Sephiroth cupped his cheek, making him feel even more afraid than before. He hated when the man touched him, it made him sick. Goosebumps broke out on his skin at the feeling of that large, cold hand, and the way he was being looked at.

Not again.

"Please, I d-don't like this. I feel weird."

"I'm not doing anything to dislike Cloud." Sephiroth whispered, tucking a piece of blond hair behind Cloud's ear, leaving a thumb trailing along his cheekbone, just under his eye. He ran his gaze over the finely featured face adoringly, loving the flushed tinge to the pale skin which he could make out even in the dark room. He gave the boy a smile. "I just want to be close to you for a while." He leaned his head in, his hair spilling around them both, like a silver curtain.

"Just… move back and… I can't," Cloud was becoming flustered, trying vainly to move his heads to the side. He couldn't believe this was going to happen again, how did he let himself get into this situation? Close to him… what on Gaia did that mean? Why would Sephiroth want to be close to him? He was just…Cloud. He was so normal, why did this man hold such an infatuation with him? Was this the way he acted with his previous victims as well, and what it a prelude to? He was going to die soon wasn't he? That's what this meant. Oh Gaia… he was afraid.

"You're simply afraid of what you do not know." Sephiroth decided that that sounded rather patronizing, but he didn't care at that moment. All he could think about was getting another taste of his boy. It was all he could focus on now. He had never imagined that someone could literally be drawn to another person as he was to Cloud. It was pure addiction, the same as any addict suffered in the slums. But entirely different at the same time, more meaningful because there was real emotion fueling his desire.

He leaned in one inch closer, feeling the boy's warm breath touch his face, but as soon as their lips almost touched, a hairsbreadth away, he pulled himself back again, watching Cloud's expression change to a confused surprise as he pushed his long hair back behind his shoulders.

Cloud let out a long breath, bringing his eyes up to his captor and watching to see what he was going to do. His heart was pounding manically in his chest and sweat was running down his temples but the fear took precedence over everything else.

"This isn't right…" Sephiroth looked down at him with a thoughtful expression. Cloud stared at him soundlessly. The words surprised him and he was wary of what his captor meant. Was Sephiroth actually admitting what he was doing was wrong? Would he leave him alone now? Was he showing him mercy?

"No, it isn't." He said slowly, trying not to seem too hopeful. He was definitely wary of Sephiroth intentions.

Sephiroth raised a brow at the reply, not expecting one. He looked down at his boy and saw the strained calmness on his face.

"We should move to the bed."

Cloud felt his stomach drop. His expression became horrified as he mouthed the word. Bed? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. That wasn't fair. Not the bed… that meant. Oh Gaia, he knew what would happen there. He couldn't go through that now. He would die. He had actually thought for a minute… how could he have been so stupid? This man was evil and cruel and he would hurt him in so many ways. He shouldn't think otherwise, it would only lead to further sadness.

He felt his skin prickle when Sephiroth leaned down again and slid his arms underneath him, not understanding what the he was trying to do, he began to struggle as much as his useless body would allow.

"Stop…"

Sephiroth ignored the boy's protests, slipping his arms easily under his shoulders and knees. Cloud shook his head and was obviously trying his best to move his lethargic limbs, only succeeding in kicking uselessly as he was lifted towards the tall mans chest.

Clouds head spun at the sensation of being lifted from the ground, and he had to swallow the bile that came up his throat.

"Put m-e down," he ordered hoarsely, pushing his hand up to Sephiroth's face and trying to scratch him, but the man just moved his head away.

Sephiroth heard something snap and looked down to see that he had stood on the half full plate he had brought to Cloud earlier. The blond clearly hadn't enough time to finish it before the drug had taken effect. He would clean it up later

"Hush," he muttered as he placed the whimpering boy softly down on the bed. Cloud tried to roll off it but the man simply stopped him with a well placed arm.

Cloud felt despair as his captor joined him completely on the bed, climbing over him and lying on his right side, making the bed shake and then dip. The silver haired demon leaned his head on his hand and looked down at his boys face, using the hand that wasn't supporting him to caress Cloud's cheek gently, subtly ensuring he wouldn't turn away. Cloud looked up at him fearfully but he just smiled.

Cloud felt hopeless. What could he do? He was too weak to fight against Sephiroth and being drugged and dressed this way only heightened his vulnerability against a warrior clad in battle leather.

"Don't be frightened Cloud," Sephiroth honestly felt sorry for his boy. Cloud was only fifteen, a child, he had to remember that. The boy represented so much for Sephiroth, he was the sole focus of his existence now but he was still but an infant in the scheme of all things. It was difficult to keep that fact in mind.

"I just want to go asleep now," Cloud pleaded sadly, his stomach starting to knot so much it felt sore. "I'll even sleep in the bed. Please just leave me alone."

Sephiroth laughed lightly, amused and endeared at the boys attempted bargaining. He loved him.

"I won't harm you," he said to him, leaning more over the boy, pushing his hair back so it wouldn't get in the way. He stared at those rheumy blue eyes, feeling his groin tighten

Cloud opened his mouth to reply but Sephiroth quickly leaned forward and covered his lips with his own. Clouds eyes widened and he shook his head. He couldn't believe this was happening again, why did he have to go through this again? Why did he have to go through this at all? It wasn't fair. The feeling of the other's lips was so much worse than he remembered. The heat and the taste. He had never kissed anyone before this, so he wasn't used to it. He felt sick to his stomach. So violated and just…scared.

The blond tried to struggle for a few more minutes as Sephiroth kept their lips together, barley separating for breath. However, just those movements caused his energy to drain away and soon all he could do was lie there, his lips pursed as tightly as they could, while the disgusting, horrible man molested him.

Sephiroth was pleased to see the resistance die out of the boy. Although his lips remained shut they had slackened slightly and allowed him to enjoy them more. His tongue snaked out to seek entrance into that sacred mouth but Cloud clenched his teeth together, seeming to be still defiant. He smirked, leaning up a bit and snaking his hand from Clouds cheek all the way down his torso and to his bare thigh, where he pinched strongly.

"Ah,"

Cloud gasped at the unexpected pain and Sephiroth took the opportunity to deepen the kiss. He leaned in heavily and ran his tongue along the roof and walls of the others mouth, feeling his sex harden to almost fullness. He moaned softly and closed his eyes, just reviling in the taste and feelings he was experiencing.

Clouds surprise faded and he didn't even think before he brought his teeth down hard on the invading tongue. He widened his eyes in shock as his captor growled and pulled back. He was sure he was going to vomit at the metallic taste left in his mouth. He let it dribble down his chin, unable to lift a limb to wipe it away. Expecting anger, he was extremely surprised when he saw a smile on Sephiroth's face above him.

"Tut tut." Sephiroth chuckled, wiping the back of his hand against his mouth; he pulled it away and was stunned to see blood on his hand. No one had made him bleed in over thirteen years. He felt an ache form at bottom of his chest, as though a hole had been drilled there. His blood was red… it looked so normal, so…human? He furrowed his brows. It was red.

Cloud stayed still, barley breathing as he watched his kidnapper. Sephiroth was just staring at his hand, his expression blank and his pupils slit in a way that no human eyes should be. What would this mean for him? The blond took a breath, just praying that he could be anywhere but here. He shouldn't have done that. It was a stupid thing to do when he was in this position, but he couldn't have stopped himself. It was just an instinctive reaction. Self-defense.

Sephiroth glared at his boy, his amusement quickly morphing into anger. He put his hand on Cloud's chest.

"You do not fight me." He hissed into the teen's flinching face.

"You were-"

"Silence."

Sephiroth sneered down at him, leaning in and placing an angry kiss on his cheek. Cloud gasped and turned his head away when the man kept his mouth on his face, placing small kisses all along his cheek and temple. Everywhere those lips touched became hypersensitive, and he had to block out the noises he was making. Sephiroth was breathing loudly and Cloud knew he was aroused. He shut his eyes tightly, trying to will himself out of that place, if not in body then at least in mind.

"I don't," Sephiroth started in a breathless voice, "take disrespect well." He moved down to the boys jawbone and latched his mouth there, lightly, relishing in Cloud's cry of surprise. His hair was streaming about them both again, sliding across Clouds forehead and onto the pillow. "You will show me respect." He placed another hard kiss on the boy's cheek, trying to emphasize his point by pressing against the bone. "If you ever attempt to physically harm me again, as pathetic as it is, you will be punished." He stopped talking then, too overcome with pleasurable feelings to form a thought. His lips found the boys neck, feeling the pulse. Cloud was alive. Cloud was his.

Cloud honestly felt unwell as he tried vainly to block out the ministrations. It was too much; he couldn't handle any of it. There were no words to describe the feeling of someone you hate, someone you're terrified of, kissing you and taking leisure with your body, as if your mind didn't matter. It was hell… pure and simple. His stomach clenched painfully when he felt the man open his mouth against his neck. Had his body not been so weak, he would have rolled his shoulders in a natural reflex to someone touching the area.

"No!"

Cloud shouted out and tried to sit up when he felt a hand run up to the top of his thigh, going under his shorts, stopping just beneath the hem. Sephiroth pushed him back down but he tried to get up again, kicking his legs as much as he could. His adrenaline seemed to be overriding the drug, although his resistance was still useless because at his very strongest Sephiroth was superior to him by a thousand milestones.

"Stop." He attempted to be stern but he knew his voice was too weak to be threatening. He tried not to cry out as he was forcefully pushed back down by a hand on his chest. He tilted his head backwards and attempted dislodge the man from his neck. "STOP." He shouted, frustrated and extremely panicked. He couldn't let this happen. It couldn't happen to him. He couldn't do such a thing…not with Sephiroth. It would be so humiliating, and painful. Gaia, he couldn't do it.

"_You_ stop." Sephiroth hissed, pressing hard on his chest making him gasp. His bones actually groaned beneath the pressure. "You'll do as I say. Stay still."

"No." Cloud struggled back again, eyes wide, "I won't let you r-"

"And what are you going to do?" Sephiroth caught his chin in a painfully hard grip and pulled him up from the pillows, until their noses almost touched. His face was tight with tension, the deep lines around his lips and eyes emphasized by the darkness. There was some blood on his bottom lip. "What could you do to stop me?"

"I don't want it." Clouds answered through gritted teeth. He looked up at the evil man with his best defiant expression, dying a little inside when he was simply smiled at.

"What?" Sephiroth cooed as the anger seeped into a calmer, wide eyed expression. He let the boy back down and rubbing his thumb over the soft, sweaty cheek. "You don't like it when I do this?" He pinched the thigh his hand was still gripping, relishing in Clouds sudden yelp. "Or this?" He ran his hand up further on the leg.

"Stop." Cloud whispered. He tried to twist away again but Sephiroth only pressed on him harder.

"Or this?" Sephiroth took his hand off the boys face and slipped it in between two buttons of the shirt covering Clouds sternum. The teen tried to lift a hand but could only raise it a few inches off the bed. He moaned again as he felt Sephiroth's cold hand encroach on the skin of his chest. He slowed his breathing, trying to get rid of the awful contact.

"Please," he moaned, weary and upset.

"Or maybe this?" His captor smiled and leaned down towards his lips again. Cloud clamped his mouth shut, clinching his lips tightly together until they turned white but Sephiroth ignored it and covered the unwilling mouth with his own. He slid out his long tongue and licked the crease between Cloud lips, making the blond scrunch his face in disgust.

"Trust me." Sephiroth whispered suddenly, Cloud shook his head. Sephiroth began to run his hand more roughly on the smooth, finely haired thigh, pinching and gathering flesh making Cloud very uncomfortable and himself so aroused he wasn't sure how he would muster the will to stop.

The hand on the boy's chest became more noticeable, running between the boy's pecs and almost grazing a nipple at one stage, which had made Cloud jump. The boy wasn't aroused, Sephiroth noticed with a small bit of frustration. He wasn't really expecting him to be though. Cloud was too scared.

"Please, please, please stop." Cloud repeated mindlessly as his captor became more rough and violating. He couldn't stand it, he couldn't stand his touch. He never wanted to be touched again. It was horrible. Sex wasn't a good thing, it was painful and humiliating and disgusting. Cloud didn't want to have sex. He hated sex.

He hated Sephiroth.

This man had done such horrible things to him. He had stalked him, pretended to be his father, drugged him, and kidnapped him. He couldn't have him. He wasn't allowed to use his body like this. It was so tired; he just wanted to go to sleep now.

Cloud began to struggle again, shaking his head violently and shouting. He couldn't really move his legs but he tried his best. As Cloud's struggles became more determined so did Sephiroth's restraint. He tried to silence his victim, grabbing his hands and legs while pressing his chest into him. The struggle lasted a couple of minutes, Cloud's hysterical screams and shouts filling the room, until suddenly Sephiroth stilled and rolled off the boy.

Cloud was breathing heavily now, and once the man moved off him he used all his strength to turn himself onto his side, forcing his face into the pillow and curling his knees up.

Sephiroth didn't say or do anything but just watched his angel attempt to calm himself. He raised his own hand and saw that it was shaking, and that his whole body was in a similar state. He exhaled, looking again at Cloud and then down at himself. He had gotten carried away? He hadn't meant for things to get this far with the boy yet but it seemed that whenever he was near Cloud, whenever he could smell or see or feel him his self restraint just wasn't up to its normal standard. That was problematic, and he felt slightly disgusted with himself for what he perceived as weakness. His strength, which he had prided himself on throughout his life, could now be his ruin. He could hurt Cloud, and that realization settled like a lump of stone at the bottom of his stomach.

He had only wanted to spend some time with the boy where he wouldn't be fought against, just touch and kiss him for a while to show him that such actions were not painful or anything to be feared. Cloud was young and he understood that he would be frightened of him, but his intention had been to slowly get him used to the contact and develop it between them day by day. That was all he had meant to do, but instead…

Cloud barley noticed Sephiroth placing his hand back in his hair, his mind was whirring and he felt light headed. He could feel his body loosing energy rapidly, and decided to just let it happen. He didn't want to feel anything; he just wanted it all to go away. He let his thoughts become nonsensical and very quickly found himself drifting off into a heavy sleep.

Sephiroth stayed still and quite as he watched the boy journey into slumber. Once he was certain that he was asleep, he lowered himself down onto the mattress, and very slowly slid his arm around Clouds waist. He moaned when the small back brushed against his groin, which was harder than it had ever been in his life. But sexual frustration could not ruin the feeling of being able to lie beside his boy, to hold him against him as he slept. Protecting him from everything that could harm him, keeping him comfortable and warm. He lay down more fully on the pillow and pulled the boy until he could breathe into his hair.

Cloud was beautiful with his face relaxed in sleep, pressed to the pillow as he breathed softly. His little body was so warm; Sephiroth pressed closer to him and sighed contently. This was okay for now. He hadn't done anything too severe and would try harder the next day to be more patient with the boy. He wasn't an animal ruled on impulse and hormones, and he would prove that to his jittery lover. He just needed to hold the boy to himself for a while, to have him pressed against him. He could still taste his own blood in his mouth, but it didn't bring about the feelings of rage as it had moments ago. He could forgive his boy, his life mate. He was what kept Sephiroth alive now. If the boy went away then he would just be a ghost, and would drift from the planet into the lifestream like a passing shadow.

He stayed like that all night, not sleeping but merely basking in the moment. It was his first time spending the night with his cherub, and it was so much better than he ever thought it could be.

He felt complete.

They were together.

But he could still taste the blood.

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**Thank you for all of the kind reviews I received for the last chapter, they were so funny and sweet. You people crack me up with some of the things you write and you're encouragement and advice are what inspire me to keep writing so if you enjoyed this chapter or have anything to comment on please leave a review. I'd also like to thank anyone who has added this story to their alert or favorite list.**

**Special hello to AyaseFanGirl, thank you for your messages!**

**I hope everybody had a great Christmas and want to wish everyone a Happy New Year. Have a good one. :)**


	20. XX

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

**This fan fiction contains dark, upsetting psychological and sexual themes so if you are not comfortable with the that kind of thing then please don't read because I don't want to upset anyone.**

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Axel moaned as his body slammed onto the floor with a thud. He squeezed his eyes shut and gasped while clutching his stomach. Really, he was getting sick of this.

He let himself be overdramatic for a while longer, groaning and sighing miserably on the ground, before he took a deep breath and forced himself to his feet. As he closed the window his gaze lingered over to his bed. His beautiful, warm, comfortable bed. What time was it? Maybe he could get in it for a few minutes. Just one second of-

"Axel!"

The knocking on the door made him wince, closing his eyes and clenching his teeth in discomfort as his veins joined in with the rhythm.

"Get dressed and come down for breakfast. I'm not going to say it again!"

"I'll be down, just getting dressed." He shouted back, his voice hoarse and raspy. His mother seemed to be content with this, because she didn't say anything else and he heard her footsteps travel back down the hall.

He ran both hands through his knotted, gel set hair as he got himself to his feet, glancing over at his radio clock to see that it was already seven forty five. Close. Too close. Need to be out of there sooner. Got it memorized?

Quick work was made of finding something to wear in his closet of black and grey, and pulling them on mindlessly. Before he shrugged on his leather waist knee length jacket he had a quick sniff of his armpit and grimaced; he could use a shower. Oh well, couldn't be helped.

Once dressed he rubbed at his face to try and circulate the blood there, then made his way to the only bathroom in the small council flat. As he passed his cousin's door he banged the back of his knuckles against it. His rings hardening the sound.

"Get up Reno," he called, elongating his words. "School time."

He left it at that and then went into the bathroom, locking the door behind him. The redhead had to his brush his teeth twice in order to satisfactorily rid himself of the smoky and other unsavory remnants affecting his breath, then he went about fixing his hair into his its usual spikes using mass amounts of hair Gel over stuff already dried there from the day before. It was a miserable thing to do but again, couldn't be helped.

"Gaia," he muttered in exasperation as he saw the tub was almost empty. He sighed and put it back down, then he criticized his reflection in the mirror. He liked the tattoo's; teardrops under his eyes.

"Heh," he chuckled, fingering one of the patterns lazily. They were symbolic, those tears, people thought he was trying to make a statement, or being pretentious, but that was their systematic minds trying to deal with something new. He didn't care. They didn't understand the darkness in this world. Sora was right. That's why they had such a true connection; they understood each other's darkness's, their flaws. They didn't pretend.

Finally he left the bathroom and when he saw that Reno's door was still closed he growled and knocked again.

"Get up. Reno."

Nothing.

"Reno!"

The redhead was gearing himself to go in and wake his cousin manually but then he heard the muffled, agitated 'alright' coming from inside. He nodded, satisfied that he had annoyed his cousin and made him as miserable as he was that morning, and then went to join his mother in the kitchen.

She was bustling around in her demeaning waitress outfit, buttering some slices of toast and putting them on a plate.

"Good morning." She said cheerily, making him glower.

"I think I'll stay home today. Feel sick." He explained, rubbing circles on his stomach. He heard her leave out a sarcastic laugh.

"Right," she drawled, slamming the plate on the counter making him wince. He blew out some air and sat up to take a slice of bread, nibbling on it unenthusiastically. His mother walked to the press beside the fridge and got something out of it, he couldn't see what it was though. Didn't care.

"Hm," she made a soft, displeased sound. Her back still turned to him. He lifted a brow in question.

"What?"

She turned around, her bleached curls swinging around her head as she held a letter in her hand protectively.

"It's that bloody lowlife again," She shook her head and rubbed at the bridge of her nose.

"What now?" His blood began to boil in a split second, the bread cracked within his grip.

"Oh, same as I told you last week really. He'll be out by the end of the year and wants to set up visitations until then."

Axel leaned back and shook his head in exasperation.

"Visitations or conjugals." He spat, but immediately felt sick for it, more so when she gave him a disbelieving, dark stare.

"Sorry, I just can't believe he's even asking that. Let alone that he's actually getting out so soon. It's fucked up as Ifrit. This system's a joke."

"Well there's nothing we can do about that except hope that he goes his own way once he's out. Until then I'll just keep denying these requests." The woman replied; her face heavily lined with stress. Makeup crumbling on her nose. The skin of someone who's seen too much of this city.

"Can you keep doing that or eventually would he have to?"

"Will who have ta what?"

They both went dead silent and Axel saw his mother quickly put the letter in behind her apron as she spoke.

"Uh, just a thing about my boss. Not important love." She muttered, smiling tersely at him before turning towards the window

Trying not to act obvious, he played with the hard bread in his hands and resumed his previous ill-humor. Though it felt somewhat juvenile now.

"The fucks wrong with you?" Reno muttered, sitting down beside him and getting his own breakfast.

"I'm tired." He grumbled, giving his mother a dirty look. She didn't seem to care though.

"My dear son thinks he is entitled to miss out on his education because he stays out late with his boyfriend."

"Oh, got lucky last night did ya?" He was embarrassed-and guilty-at the other redhead's words in front of his mother and tried to get him to shut up by elbowing him in the ribs.

"Shut up man." He whispered, giving a look towards the woman. Reno just sniggered at him, his eyes alight with mischief. Uh, he was too tired for this shit today.

"Okay boys, I'm off to work my shift. Have a good day. Axel, perk up." Yeah, perk up. Hadn't managed that since he was about five but whatever she wanted to believe...

"So, did ya bone last night then?" Reno was always crude, and never subtle.

"None of your business Ren." He replied, as he did every time the boy asked about Sora. Reno was like this with everyone. He didn't mean anything by it really, he just liked riling people.

"No, s'not my business," Reno grinned. He wrapped his arm around his shoulder and leaned in close, "might be someone else's business though. Does Leon know yer screwing around with his baby bro bro yet?"

Well, that did hit a nerve. Dealing with the relations of one's lover is never fun; especially brothers. But Leon Leonhart was a different story entirely; Axel actually had a theory that he was a psychopath. The symptoms were there, he was quiet and stoic, violent on occasion, moody and always seemed to be watching everyone with those narrowed eyes of his. It was pretty obvious the guy knew about he and Sora already, but like the psycho he was he was waiting them out, waiting for them to crack. Creep.

"Haven't got around to that yet. Anyway isn't that Sora's job? He's not my brother." He said, realizing the statement sounded extremely petulant. He shrugged out from the others hold and stood up, Reno's laughter following him across the kitchen.

"Sora's not the one s'gonna get his ass kicked. Fuckers a psychopath." He wasn't alone then. How many people would he have to agree before the guy was locked up? He'd gladly start rallying.

**Sign this petition to get Leon Leonhart off the streets for good. **

He looked at his faint reflection in the kitchen window and noticed that some of his spikes were out of shape so he obsessively went about fixing them.

"Ready to go?" He asked once he was done, turning to look at his cousin who was stuffing the last bit of crust into his mouth.

After a brief argument over whose car to bring, they took Reno's crappy thing and made their way to the conformist hell that was the education system.

They received many stares as they made their way from the school parking lot and into the building. Red hair wasn't common in Midgar, and they were the only two with the color in their school. When standing side by side, it made people give them a second glance. He was aware of it, and found it extremely pathetic.

Finally they reached their classroom, but the bottom literally fell out of his stomach when he saw who was there.

"Morning." Fucking Leon Leonhart, the one damn person he didn't want to see. He was waiting for them too. P. S. Y. C. H. O.

"Hey man, what's up?" He greeted his voice not as strong as he would have hoped. He followed Reno's lead as they both took a seat beside the brunet.

There was an awkward few minutes of silence before Reno spoke up.

"What's new?"

However, Leon ignored his cousin and turned straight towards him. He looked him up and down for a minute, Axel theorizing that he was thinking of the best ways to kill him, and then cleared his throat.

"You look tired Ax, late night?" Oh, he knew alright. But what exactly did he know?

"Yeah," he said with a breath, "I was out late. Friends..." Well, all night actually, but he didn't need to know that.

"And that new boyfriend of yours?" He looked at the classroom door. How far could he get before being tackled to the ground?

"Yeah…uh-"

"Hmmm, what was that one's name again?" Leon wasn't giving him a chance to come up with the excuses and it was making him extremely flustered. He let out a strange chuckle and scratched at the back of his head.

"You wouldn't't know him…"

"Try me." Okay, that was hard. Should he outright lie or try to change the direction of the conversation? Leon wasn't looking too happy.

"Uh…" he attempted.

"Did ya hear about Zack an Tif?" Oh, thank Gaia for everything that had happened in his cousin's life to lead him here at this moment. That was probably a horrible thing to be thankful for, but when Leon averted his gaze to the other redhead he couldn't bring himself to take it back.

"What about them?"

"They broke up." Axel looked at Leon, who was clearly uninterested in the topic and looking for a way to change it back.

"Oh, well I'm not overly surprised." He sat back and crossed his arms over his chest, his hard features relaxing.

He took the time to give Reno an grateful look.

"Neither was I." Reno looked back at the other boy. "Tifa's got the tits but Zack aint-" Just then he saw the owner of the 'tit's' in question walked through the door.

"Reno." He hissed quickly. Reno looked at him in annoyance but then saw the girl enter along with Yuna.

"Hey." Tifa said and Leon and Axel mumbled a greeting.

"Hi Tif. Glad to see ya back." Reno called to her. She nodded and sat down, Yuna following suit.

"Thanks Reno." She replied.

"So," the redhead started. He rolled his eyes, knowing Reno's tone.

"Yes?" She kind of smirked back at him, clearly expecting something as well.

"I hear yer single again."

"Reno!" He groaned, along with the others. He was a prick sometimes. It was strange because he wasn't stupid in any way, but he just continued to say the wrong thing all time. He didn't care…

"You're retarded." Axel said, picking up a pencil and flicking it at the other. He hit Reno in the face and the boy growled, giving him a dirty look.

"Jeeze Axel. Just cause you're screwing that boy doesn't mean everyone's satisfied." Shit. He went still, biting his tongue.

"What boy?" Tifa asked and he winced. Friends are bad.

"Yes." That was Leon. "What boy. Axel?" He looked at him, feeling very put on the spot by all the eyes on him. They all knew already.

"Uh, it's eh-" but he was cut off when Yuna called out something. He looked to the door and saw Yuffie running in, her face a mask of distress.

"What's wrong?" Axel only asked to continue the distraction, not particularly worried about whatever shallow problem the girl had. Someone stole her candy?

But as she got closer he could see the tears on her face, real tears.

"Cloud's gone missing."

Tears, tears, tears. None of them inverted.

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Cloud held the blanket against his mouth as he hiccupped uncontrollably, the whole left side of his face was saturated along with a large portion of the pillow beneath him, but the tears just continued to flow freely from his sore eyes.

"_**It's been eleven days since teenager Cloud Strife disappeared on his way to school. The police are doing everything they can, but a source close to the case has informed us that there are still no strong leads."**_

"I'm here." He whispered, sniffing heavily and gritting his teeth. He turned his face into the pillow and let himself sob into it, not caring that his pride and dignity had gone out the window. He didn't care anymore. What was the point? He was never leaving this place. He would be hurt, he would be raped and then he would be killed. That's what the future held for him so why not cry?

"_**Sky Strife has been advised by doctors to remain away from the press due to her fragile condition so we have not been able to acquire any statements from her. She is currently staying with family friends, Cid and Shera Highwind, but reporters have been prevented from attempting to approach her."**_

He turned his face towards the television again when he heard them say her name. His mom. He missed her so much. His eyes widened when the screen flickered and an enlarged still shot of his mother filled the screen. His body shook with a new batch of sobs as he studied the picture, he knew that photograph, it was several years old and one of the last taken before she had caught Geostigma. He had always liked that picture because of how…happy she looked in it; carefree. Whenever he used to pretend that she wasn't sick, and they were living a different life, that was the expression he would imagine her with. Now it was associated with this nightmare, it didn't seem right. He inhaled and wiped his eyes with the back of his hand; he missed her. He couldn't deny it anymore, he couldn't not think about her. She was his mom and he wasn't allowed to see her anymore. Why couldn't he be with her?

He coughed, breathing in through his blocked nose and keeping his blurry eyes set on the screen, happy to be able to at least look at her, even if it hurt his heart. She was his mom, she was familiar to him. He loved her so much, had he told her that? No, he hadn't, he had only considered her a burden hadn't he? How had he been so evil? How had he not shown her how much he loved her when he knew how sick and afraid she was? He should have told her every day. He closed his eyes and sighed as the picture disappeared from the screen, replaced by the plastic, makeup covered face of the impassionate news broadcaster. Gone. She was gone. He was never going to see her again, he would never get to talk to her, or hear her laugh, or tell her how much he loved her. She would always be a photograph to him now, an object. A memory. She was gone forever and it was so hard to think about that he felt physically sick,

"_**The boy attended Midgar High and it's clear to see that his disappearance has shocked and saddened both pupils and the teachers alike**_."

He watched the screen flick onto an image of his school, and then the camera passed numerous faces of his old classmates, some he recognized some he didn't. It was strange to think of his school as something from the past. He still had a few years left there, exam processes and graduation. It was all supposed to be in his future, but now it was his past. The life he had and the life he should have had. It hadn't finished it yet but it was over all the same. A living death.

The camera soon stopped on people he definitely knew; Yuffie, Tidus and Yuna. He focused his attention on Yuffie because he had been far closer to her than the others. She looked so different; serious and sad. He had never seen her like that before, it was like looking at an entirely different person and it made him feel awful. He didn't want anything else in his life to change but it seemed to be all that was happening. She wasn't supposed to look like that. Everything was backwards now. He had no idea where he was.

He couldn't believe how much he missed that girl. She was always so…Yuffie. She was one of his closest friends and he just took her for granted, he realized that now. He took all of his friends for granted, ignoring them and judging them, thinking that they knew less than him because his life was so messed up. How had he been so selfish? How had he never considered their problems or thoughts? He just thought that it didn't matter… that they would always be there. He felt guilt coil in his stomach as he watched the girl cry over him, and if he had been able he would have chuckled at how she attempted to high-kick the camera trying to get close to her. She shouldn't be upset over him, he didn't deserve it. She should just forget him. They all should. He was just a shadow now.

He pulled the remote from beneath the pillow and shut off the television. He instantly forgot about the object in his hand and it fell to the floor with a soft thump as he turned his body towards the wall, not caring that his clothes and the blankets; Sephiroth's clothes and blankets, were becoming twisted. He kept his face close to the pillow and cried quietly but steadily.

He just wanted to go home. He missed everything so much. His Mother, his friends, his teachers, his school, his room. Every little thing he had taken for granted was gone now and he felt like he was in a different world. A horrible, sad, scary strange world where Sephiroth ruled like a terrible shadow cast from the white ceiling that was the sky. He couldn't stand it. He couldn't stand only being able to see his loved ones on a screen, like they were fictional characters and his whole life had been a show which was over now. They were his friends, Yuffie, Reno, Tifa, and his mother, she was his mother. It wasn't fair! He could see them if he wanted. Sephiroth couldn't keep them from him. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair. It wasn't…

Fair.

Zack Fair.

He ran his fingers up and down the pillow, watching them with a glum expression. Why was Zack so much harder to think about than anyone else? Even his mother. Zack was different. He was his friend but he now realized that he had always been so much more than that. He loved him. He had always loved him. He should have known that the reason he had always hated to see Zack with other boys and girls, that he had so often stole glances at the other's body when he wasn't looking, that those rare occasions when he had pleasured himself with the other's face in his mind, was because he loved him, he wanted to be with him. Zack was always supposed to be there with him. His friends would move away, school would finish, and eventually his mom would succumb to her illness. But Zack was a constant… Zack was always there. That's what he had thought anyway and now wasn't prepared for the separation.

He closed his eyes and fisted his hand beside his head, trying to fight off the wave of sickness that came with the memories. He didn't want to link these things; that's why he had tried so hard to leave any thought about his home out of his mind. He didn't want to bring the two worlds together.

The last few months of his previous life hadn't been the best, bad things kept happening to him, things he now knew to be orchestrated by his kidnapper, but that night he really thought things were getting better, Zack had broken up with Tifa and everything would be easier because of that. How wrong he had been. Everything beforehand had been nothing compared to the nightmare he was now in. The loneliness, isolation and constant terror he was experiencing threatened to suffocate him at any moment and it was hard to handle. He wanted to go home.

Hot tears started to rain heavily from his eyes after the brief intermission and for the rest of the night the only sound in the eerily silent room was sobs, and then heavy breathing from an exhausted slumber.

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_Cloud was smiling._

_His fingers pulled the leaf they were grasping, ripping it in half as he watched his boy. It was a warm day and Cloud and his peers were sitting out on the grass in front of the school, apparently enjoying their break from the stuffy classrooms._

_Sephiroth smiled lightly as he ran his eyes over his boy's form; Cloud looked endearing; sitting there with his legs crossed and smiling in his bashful way at that small black-haired girl. Cloud seemed to be close with that one. It was only superficial though, he was just striving for company._

_It was pleasant to be able to just relax and enjoy his time with the boy. He didn't get to do it enough; his hectic schedule prevented it and though he tried not to let that bother him on days like this, he was increasingly becoming aware that eventually he would have to change something. He was getting more and more eager to be with his boy; every morning, when he woke up he wished that his love was in the bed beside him. He wished he could kiss him. Touch him. Own him. Watching the boy through a window, or a screen, or from a distance was becoming less satisfying. It wasn't real. He needed to touch him, he needed to make sure he was real._

_He let the leaf fall in pieces from his hand, flowing towards the grass with an unnoticeable jingle. Unnoticeable. That was what he was. Cloud didn't notice him. He didn't know of his love, of his longing. He didn't know how he had already been with him for almost six months. He didn't know that he was the one who was speaking with him every night, sharing secrets and dreams. He didn't know him, and that was why Sephiroth was not happy. Cloud was all he cared about; he would do anything for the boy, protect him from anyone who would harm him. He was his life. There was no reason for Sephiroth to live anymore without Cloud. He was his heart. And he didn't even know it._

_He scratched his nails against the bark of the branch, trying to will his body to cool down. He had to control himself. Cloud would know him eventually. He would belong to him and no one else. Then, Sephiroth wouldn't have to watch him interact with lesser beings, watch him pretend to love them, while he could do nothing but silently observe him. Eventually all Cloud would have would be him._

_He turned his eyes back to the blond, scolding himself for getting distracted. He narrowed his eyes when he saw that the red-head, a boy whom he frequently saw amongst the group of friends, had his arm slung over Cloud's shoulder. Perhaps it was casual, a friendly gesture, but it still angered him to the point of fury. How could some commoner think to touch Cloud in such a way, treat him like a normal person, like they were equal. Could they not see? He was a God compared to those peons. They were lucky to be in the presence of such beauty. They were not allowed to touch him. If he could sit beside his boy like that, if he could show everyone that the cherub belonged to him, if he could make him smile. Then he would be complete. _

_He **would **be complete._

_He felt proud of his boy when he saw how he scoffed and elbowed the fiend away, who in turn sighed dramatically before going off to annoy someone else. Cloud then began talking with another of his friends, Sephiroth didn't notice who, he was too intent on watching his boys expressions as he spoke, and the way he kept picking little pieces of grass and twisting them between his fingers. Everything the gorgeous boy did was absurdly fascinating to him._

_He tried to pretend that Cloud wasn't really interested in what the other's had to say, that he didn't really care for his companions and only used them to feel more normal and social, and that he was deeply unhappy underneath the fake smiles and laughs, but he could not deny the fondness that shone in the boys eyes, the sincere emotion he expressed when dealing with them. Cloud really believed he loved these people, and that drove Sephiroth mad. How could his special boy be content to mingle with such undeserving life forms? How could he find true happiness in what they had to say? Cloud was better than them. He couldn't like them. He couldn't love them. Couldn't he see that?_

_He sighed and leaned against the branch in front of him more heavily, drumming his fingers on it. No Cloud wasn't content, not really. He just believed he deserved nothing better. Of course Cloud didn't know how special he was. No one ever told him. In fact they did the opposite. They piled there own problems onto the sensitive boy until he was suffocated in them. They made sure he wasn't happy. They wanted him miserable. They didn't really care for him, they were only concerned with themselves, and they hated to see such an obviously superior person happy. Someone who clearly stood above them._

_They were human._

_When he had his boy with him he would show him what it felt like to be loved. He would show him how special he was and how much he had affected him. Cloud would belong to him in every way, and Sephiroth would take on the responsibility of making sure he was well and happy. _

_He pressed his chin against the bark; he couldn't wait for the day they became one._

_Sephiroth winced when the chime of the school bell echoed in his enhanced ears, scratching his ear drums. The man frowned when he saw Cloud pack up his stuff and stand up, preparing to go back into the greedy building swallowing them all up. _

_He watched Clouds small form disappear into the crowd of hormones and flesh, only recognizable by the shock of yellow hair that was a shade brighter than all of his peers. He tried to console himself with the knowledge of what would eventually come to pass as Cloud disappeared completely from his view for the next three hours._

_The leaves were lulled with the same wind that spread through the grass below them, whispering a soft comfort to him._

_Yours, Yours, Yours_

"_Mine."_

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"_These are nice."_

"_Hmm."_

"_Oh, these are lovely."_

"_Sure are."_

"_I like eggs."_

"_Yeah- what?" _

"_Oh you could at least pretend to care what I say!"_

_Sephiroth smiled as he watched his boy get chastised by his mother. It was a Sunday afternoon and it was one of those rare occasions where Clouds mother ventured outside the apartment. She looked like a ghost, Sephiroth mused, as he watched the pale woman walk through the rows of flowers and plants, smiling and laughing with her arm clinging to his boy. Cloud didn't seem embarrassed to be seen with his mother like this; in fact he looked quite happy to be out with her. It was a foreign concept to hi, because he had never had anything close to a mother himself, so his opinion of the whole scene was admittedly absent the appropriate research. _

_He stood within the doors of the warehouse behind the small flower shop, his dark clothes blending him into the shadows. The occasional person who did pass by paid him little attention; not approaching or questioning him. He was invisible to them now, but if lowered his hood they would have been swarming around him like flies to a decaying corpse._

"_Are you getting tired?" He loved the sound of his boy's voice, it was so soft and low, masculine but childish. _

"_Not at all, I feel better than I have in years. Shiva bless modern medicine." Sky's annoying laughter rang in his ears, hitting off every nerve in his head. He hated that bitch. She was the reason his boy was so unhappy. She had destroyed his childhood._

"_Yeah. It's good though." Cloud replied noncommittally but Sephiroth could see the delight on his face. Silly boy. He should just come to terms with the fact that his mother was never going to be well. He had to give up his childish fantasies, and face reality._

_He watched the two for another half an hour as Sky picked out several plants and pots, making Cloud carry them. Cloud pretended to scoff at that, rolling his eyes and sighing dramatically as he pretended to struggle with the weight. His lip twitched at the behavior, Cloud whole demeanor seemed to lose years when he was around his mother, and he acted like a normal fifteen year old. Sephiroth couldn't decide whether it was an act for his mother's sake or genuine but it did offer him a glimpse into what sort of person he might have been if his circumstances were different. _

"_It's good to see you out and about Miss Strife." _

_Sephiroth looked at figure behind the counter, lured by the odd, eerie tone of the voice. He ran his eyes over the form of a young girl smiling at Cloud and his mother, his hairs standing up on his skin. She was nice looking, beautiful in fact, and dressed in unusual clothing for the city; a long pink dress with a short jacket wrapped around her slim shoulders. Her long brown hair framed her face and even tied into a ponytail it touched her lower back. She was attractive, but that's not what interested him. There was something about her that was causing a reaction within him. It was odd, and powerful. A force was surrounding her, magic he was sure, but of a different kind than what he had ever been in contact with before. He could feel its tendrils surrounding the place; he could feel it in his skin, penetrating him. It made him shiver. He realized that he had felt cold from the moment he'd stepped into this place and his for his enhanced senses that was not a common phenomenon. _

_He looked dazedly back towards his boy, watching him talk with the girl while Sky went to examine something at the back of the store. _

"_Haven't seen you in a while Cloud." He heard her say in a voice that sounded echoed, almost like it wasn't coming from her lips._

"_I know, I've been busy."_

"_I understand. It's still nice to see you when you visit." He watched Cloud frown slightly, as though he was confused about something. His demeanor seemed uncomfortable and he kept turning to look back at his mother, scraping his boot off the ground and fidgeting his fingers on the counter._

"_Yes well…I might be back next week, if Mom feels up to it." Sephiroth knew Clouds voice by now and he knew that he was lying. He didn't want to come back next week. Why?_

_Sky walked back over to them, one small pot held in her hands._

"_They really are beautiful." She said. He watched the brunette look down at the plant, and again his insides turned at how her eyes held such knowing fondness for such an insignificant thing. As if it were her living child._

"_They are."_

"_That's all then." Sky hummed, as she moved aside to let her son gather the paper bags from the counter. Sephiroth felt an urge to walk up and help the boy, but he couldn't of course.. _

"_Well, bye." Cloud mumbled, clearing his throat and shifting the bags in his grip, all the while keeping his head down._

"_Bye Cloud." Sephiroth narrowed his eyes when the blond stiffened for a fraction of a moment before nodding and turning towards the exit._

"_Goodbye Aerith. Tell you're mother to give me a call, we haven't spoken in a while." Sky walked up to the counter again, placing her hand on top of the girl's, before nodding and following her son out the door._

_Sephiroth watched the door close before glancing at the strange girl once more. He took a step backwards, his hands automatically shifting to where his masamune would normally be. She was looking at him. She could see him. He widened his eyes as he stared into hers. They weren't human. They were almost like…his, only paler. Haunted eyes, not those that belonged to a young girl. Who was she?_

"_Would you like to purchase a flower?" He was sure her mouth wasn't moving, but the words were soft and clear. He did nothing to reply, just continued to stare._

"_Oh," She turned away from him, her face held down as she nodded, making her bangs ruffle against her pink cheeks._

_Eventually she looked back at him, her eyes wide and full of liquid. She pressed her hands into the counter and leaned forward._

"_You should leave it grow."_

_His ears began to ring, and he felt his heart thrum in his chest._

_Leave it grow._

_He didn't know why, but he nodded and took a step back. Her eyes were burning into him, and he could hear it around her. Life. Life was surrounding her; it was pulsing in this place. And it was rejecting him._

_He walked back, step by step, as she looked on._

_Eventually he escaped into the darkness, but his skin continued to crawl until he felt like ripping it from his bones. _

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"Please."

Sephiroth sighed, stroking the very tense back more firmly to loosen the knots. He shifted his position on the edge of the bed before replying.

"Cloud, it's not going to happen." The boy let out a frustrated moan and rubbed his forehead against the pillow. Sephiroth smiled, finding his behavior endearing and moved his hand so it gripped the upset boy's shoulder.

"Come on, sit up and have some food. You've been in bed for almost three days now." He was getting more than fed-up at the boys self-pitying behavior. Ever since the night he had drugged him, Cloud had gone into a state of depression, lying in the bed, crying and sleeping, not eating and only drinking when forced. He had taken things a step too far too soon perhaps, but the boy really was exaggerating.

"No," Cloud rolled his shoulders, trying vainly to dislodge the large hand from it. His kidnapper didn't allow it. "I don't want to eat, I want to go home." The last part was growled out and annoyed Sephiroth with its impudence.

"It will never happen." He answered in a calm voice, chuckling at the end. "You belong to me."

"I don't."

"You don't?" He imitated him condescendingly, not able to quell the enjoyment he got in flustering his charge. He heard his boy sigh again.

"Do you like tormenting me?" Sephiroth face lost its smile as he considered the softly spoken question. Did he enjoy it? He did take pleasure in getting reactions from his boy, in hearing the little frustrated noises he made and watching his face scrunch up in anger? Yes, a part of him honestly did but that didn't mean that he was sadistic as the boy often implied. He didn't Cloud to be angry with him always, he just wanted him to return his affections, and see how much better his life could be.

"You torment _yourself _Cloud." He answered, moving his arm from the blonde's shoulder to his arm, running his fingers up and down its length. "I have done nothing but try my best to make you comfortable." Cloud suddenly sat up straight and turned to face him, his face flushed and wet.

"Do you honestly believe that?" His eyes were wide in exasperation as he stared at him. So angry and unhappy that it was making him a bit maniacal.

"I do."

"Then- then you think that stalking, m-murdering, drugging… kidnapping or molestation are forms of comfort?" Cloud couldn't stop the emotion overcoming him and he had to seal his lips shut to avoid any sounds escaping. His entire body was trembling. His eyes were red and swollen.

"They were necessary means." Sephiroth reached out towards Cloud's hair but the boy jerked back quickly, the mattress bouncing underneath him.

"To what end?"

"To have you here with me, as you are now."

"I don't fucking _want_ to be here."

The sound of skin hitting skin drowned out the echoes of Cloud's risen voice. The blond widened his eyes, confused at the direction he now faced. His face felt numbingly cold as he brought a hand up towards it. No, it wasn't cold. It was hot. Very hot. He closed his eyes as the feeling began to return, wincing at the prickly sensation reaching from he ear to his chin which worsened when he pressed on the area.

Sephiroth exhaled and lowered his arm, watching the boy hold his face and curl away from him in an attempt to protect and hide his body. His hand tingled and he opened and closed it several times to relieve the sensation. He almost regretted the action, but tried to tell himself that the boy deserved it. Raising his voice to him was bad enough, but cursing? That was unacceptable, and a perfect example of the pollution his previous life in the city had caused. One of his goals now was transforming Cloud into his ideal lover, ridding him of any filthy habits from his past and training him to be worthy of his own flesh.

"You will not shout at me." All he got was a heavy breath in return. He leaned forward and placed two fingers beneath the boys chin. Cloud shook his head and moved back in order to dislodge the grip but Sephiroth wouldn't concede and eventually managed in forcing the boy to face him.

Clouds face was pale as he stared at him with a severe mixture of anger, shock and fear. His hand was still pressed heavily against his face but Sephiroth could see the harsh red glow of the exposed skin and ear beneath it. He hadn't used all his strength, but it had been a heavy blow that would certainly leave a mark.

"Do you understand?" Cloud lowered his watery eyes, trying to lift his chin again. "You will not be disrespectful towards me. You will not shout, insult, assault or speak in such a disgusting way. You aren't in Midgar anymore Cloud, you belong to me now and you will not be allowed to behave in any unsuitable way." He could feel the blond shaking beneath his fingers.

"I'm n-not a toddler." Came the exasperated, weary response.

"No, but you are young." He moved his hand from the boy's chin to blanket the one pressed to his face, sighing softly. "It's not you're fault though, I understand that. You never had anyone to discipline you, to protect you. The world is such a horrible place isn't it? A boy with no one to care for him could not do well." This only made the blond more upset, he began breathing quickly and pursing his lips.

"People did care for me." He couldn't believe what his captor was saying. Sephiroth was making him out to be some homeless orphan. Some defenseless weakling who needed to be sheltered from the world. He did have people to care for him, he wasn't alone. He had his friends, his Mom, Zack. He was never alone.

Until now.

"No they didn't Cloud." The leather-clad man clicked his tongue, his demeanor making it seem as though he was resigned to arguing with a simple, stubborn patient. He pulled the boys hand away from his skin with a warning look when Cloud made to press it back. A bruise was already forming along the skin there, it would be a nasty mark He had to remember his superior strength, he could have easily broken the cheekbone and that would be highly unpleasant for both of them. "Think about it, what have any of them ever done to help you? The just used you. Even your own mother."

"My Mom didn't use me." Cloud almost yelled again, but the pain in his face stopped him. And the fear, but he wouldn't admit that. "What's wrong with you? She was my Mother for Gaia's sake."

"She wasn't much of a mother." Sephiroth scoffed, tilting Cloud's face to examine the mark further. Cloud pulled his hand out of his grip and brought it towards his face when he felt the tears well in his eyes. Why was his captor being so horrible? He couldn't take it now, he was too tired.

"She was sick." He whispered, swallowing heavily and his throat making an odd noise with the action.

"Dying." Sephiroth corrected bluntly and Cloud closed his eyes as if he'd been hit again, the blow being much worse. He took a breath and pleaded with himself to keep the tears back for just a short while longer. He had never heard anyone talk about an ill person in such an unsympathetic way. It devastated him to think that everything he and his mom had been through was nothing to his kidnapper. Just a tool to injure him further.

"I want to see her again." He said it to himself but Sephiroth heard and leaned in forward, placing a small, unwelcome kiss on his forehead.

"You will never see her again." Cloud brought both his hands towards his face and covered his eyes, not crying but a hairsbreadth away from it.

"Stop." He breathed out, "You have no right to decide that. You don't have a clue." Sephiroth clicked his tongue and moved to lean back against the wall. He looked towards the ceiling in thought.

"Life's not always fair Cloud. You can't always get everything you want." He murmured, thinking of the words professor Hojo had once said to him in his youth, when he had questioned why he couldn't attend a normal school with children his own age.

"Freedom isn't much to ask for." Cloud countered, bringing his hands down looking at him with an expression one could only define as traumatized. Was he doing it again, playing a sadistic game with a target who wasn't able to compete.

"You're wrong, it's the most sought after thing on this planet." Sephiroth bit the inside of his lip, thinking over his words. Freedom, what did that word mean? Was freedom a physical idea, freedom of body as Cloud was speaking of, or was it a much more complicated concept? Had he ever been free? He knew what it was like to not have the freedom to do and go as you like, his whole childhood had been spent that way, confined to laboratories and routines and walls. He had no freedom back then, but once he had grown up and moved out into the world, allowing no one but himself to dictate his actions, then had he gained freedom? Or was he still trapped? He had always felt like something was preventing him from being happy, from enjoying the pleasures of life, he had never felt liberated from the planets burdens nor the people's expectations and had lived a life of discipline and isolation. He wasn't free then, not mentally. Not until one ordinary evening when he had looked up from the counter of a normal Grocery shop and stared straight into the eyes of his salvation.

What was freedom?

Cloud was freedom.

He could only be free when his boy was with him, and that meant that Cloud could never be free again. One of them had to give up their freedom and he had made the decision that it would be the boy. Why? Because Cloud couldn't do anything to stop him. That's how life worked.

"Please let me go," Goosebumps broke out on his back as the boy's voice penetrated his mind. He snapped his head over to the other and looked at his pleading expression. Poor Cloud, didn't he know yet that he wouldn't be shown pity?

"I miss my mom and my friends."

_Beautiful boy._

"And you're little boyfriend I suppose?"

Clouds throat instantly tightened, and he snapped his eyes back to the man; wary.

"I-I don-"

"Zachary Fair?" Sephiroth watched as the boy look down. In guilt?

"He's not…that." Cloud kept his head down, worry seeping into his stomach. Sephiroth knew Zack? Of course he did, he had been stalking him so he obviously saw them together. But why was he insinuating that they were more than just close friends. They hadn't done anything to give him that idea. Sephiroth seemed angry; furious actually. That was dangerous. He wouldn't like to see this man take issue with anyone he cared for. Not when he had no qualms with taking life.

The teen was about to say something else when he was suddenly pushed back against the headboard of the bed as eager lips muffled his surprised gasp. He widened his eyes and groaned when his captor roughly kissed him, forcefully pushing his tongue through his resisting lips. The muscle soon gained entry and Cloud could nothing but lie still and sick until the other was finished, he didn't dare bite. He was cowed now by what he had felt to be a threat to Zack. His stomach churned at the taste of Sephiroth and he tried not to hear the revolting sounds of pleasure the man was making. They were the hardest to block out for some reason, they were just so intimate and irritating. He hated him.

Sephiroth closed his eyes and relished in the taste and texture of the orifice he was invading, surprised by how satisfying kissing could be with the right person. He wondered, then, how pleasurable it would feel when they finally consummated their love. He couldn't wait for that night, and it was fast approaching. He allowed himself a few more minutes of Cloud's mouth before he pulled back and stared at his love. His taste still on his tongue.

"You're mine."

The burn on his palm matched the one on Cloud's face, yet another thing connecting them together.

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**Oi, long chapter. Several things going on as the story progresses.**

**I'm sorry for missing my January chapter and so to compensate I'm going to try to get another out this month. As always I'm really interested in hearing what you all have to say so please, please review because it inspires me to write.**

**Again, sorry for wait and hope you enjoyed this chapter.**


	21. XXI

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

**This fan fiction contains dark, upsetting psychological and sexual themes so if you are not comfortable with that kind of thing then please don't read because I don't want to upset anyone.**

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"_Activating combat mode."_

_He lifted his head towards the speaker, cursing the robotic voice silently. His biceps ached as he held up the twin swords and snapped, with decreasing vigor, into the stance that had been drilled into his mind until it was as reflexive as blinking. Head high, shoulders straightened and apart, knees spread with the left leg forward, and weapons held inconspicuously at his sides._

_He didn__'__t let the discomfort show on his face, only regarded the twenty simulated opponents with a deadly glare that probably didn__'__t suit the face of an eleven year old child. The first__'__enemy__'__stepped forward and the boy__'__s expression didn__'__t change as he made quick work of it. The rest that came after were disposed of with similar ease._

_He lowered his swords when the last of the opponents fell, watching them dissolve, just as the hundreds before them had, into nothing. They were nothing, and any real enemy he fought would be the same. He couldn__'__t show mercy, or sympathy, the enemy was insignificant and he was a hero._

_His breathing was heavy as he looked towards the monitor, waiting to hear the next batch announced. He was confused when the red light at the end of the room switched to green and the doors to the training room slid open. Finished so soon?_

"_The professor wants to see you." He sh__oulders sank at the information; he should have known. He let his blades fall to the floor with a heavy clank, knowing they would be taken care of by someone less important, and walked calmly towards the exit, not giving the Shinra recruit that had spoken a single glance. He wasn__'__t allowed, and it was beneath him._

_He was handed a towel on his way to the dressing room and used it to wipe down his bare torso, which was already hardening up. His shoulders were broader than they had been two months as well.. He__'__d measured them with tape. He threw the towel into a laundry basket and headed for the shower._

_He was washed and dressed within fifteen minutes and was tying up his mid-back length hair while studying his appearance in the mirror. He squinted, running his fingers over his scalp, shifting closer to study the silver roots shining through the otherwise dark strand at the crease. There was more today… What was happening to him? He felt worry seep into his stomach but tried to shrug it off as he turned away from the mirror and made his way out of the room. Maybe he would ask the professor… he probably wouldn__'__t take something like that seriously though._

_The labs were located at the very bottom floor of the Shinra facility so it took him almost twenty minutes to get there, considering he had insisted on taking the stairs. He was__**not**__procrastinating._

_An eerie chill ran through his spine as the mechanical doors closed behind him, trapping him in this man-made hell. He avoided looking to his left or right and walked with purpose towards the small door at the end of the room._

"_Ah come in my boy," he bristled at the endearment but obeyed the command none the less. That'__s what it was, a command, not the pleasant greeting it sounded like. He kept his expression calm as he looked at the horrible hunched man._

"_Take a seat," the professor murmured, turning away from him and fiddling with something on the overcrowded counter. Sephiroth bit the inside of__his cheek and walked to a chrome stool, sitting down rigidly._

"_I had the '__honor__'__of watching you train yesterday," The professor began, not turning around yet. Sephiroth didn__'__t respond. "It was less than average. You__'__d think with all the privileges you__'__ve been given, and the years of training, you would be able to endure more than five hours of light combat without gasping and squelching like a whore." Sephiroth wanted to ask what exactly a whore was but decided to just leave it and let the insults continue._

"_I give you everything you need and you continue to disappoint me. You'__re too soft, just like you__'__re mother." This made the stoic boy turn his head, eyes searching the man__'__s back, as if an answer were written there. He had rarely heard the man mention the woman before, and had always been too afraid to ask, but now his curiosity was getting the better of his childish mind._

"_My Mother?"_

_The professor seemed surprised to hear his voice. He stiffened, as if he was in some sort of pain._

"_What was her name?" He kept his eyes on the jar of liquid Hojo was holding, feeling his stomach become tight. He hated that__stuff more than anything else on the planet; it always made him feel sick._

"_I'__ve told you before that its not important." The man__'__s voice, always shrill, was strained with exasperation and contempt. Sephiroth pursed his lips._

"_But…you knew her?" He looked on hope__fully as the professor stopped whatever he was doing for a moment and clicked his tongue._

"_I did."__He rasped…and then said nothing else._

_Sephiroth opened his mouth to ask more but then the other scoffed and slammed his hand down on the counter, knocking over a test tube. It splashed onto the ground, the glass shattering into hundreds of insignificant pieces. Red liquid spilling over the floor._

"_A fool," he spat, "too soft and sentimental for greatness. Gave up everything for nothing. A fool. Like her son."_

_He ignored the jibe and sat forward as Hojo turned towards him, the long needle glistening in his hand, causing the boy to gulp. He didn__'__t know why thirty men charging towards him armed with every kind of dangerous weapon barely made him bat an eyelid whereas one glance at the professors instruments made him want to run away. They hurt him so much more than anything else._

"_W-where is she now?" He licked his lips and tensed up as Hojo took his arm and rolled up his sleeve. The man scoffed and made a cackling sound in his throat, as though he had tasted something unpleasant._

"_Dead."_

_He barley noticed the needle penetrating his skin, nor the sting as the green fluid, he didn__'__t know what it was, entered his veins. He mulled over the word in his head. Dead. His mother was dead. There was a strange comfort in that. She hadn__'__t left him, or abandoned him, or disliked him. She had died, but if she were sill alive she would love him and not let the professor hurt his arms with needles or make him sick._

_He tried not to sound too sad when he asked how she died._

_Hojo looked up at him while he deposited the needle in the bin, he smirked._

"_She died giving birth to you." The sadistic man cackled as he watched the__boy__'__s eyes widen. He snorted and waved his hand as though he were batting a fly._

"_You may go now, return to your room for the night." Sephiroth nodded dumbly and stood up. He felt his hands and legs shake as he walked slowly out of the lab and made his way to his room. They always tingled like this after a shot. He felt horrible._

_Back at the room, he had barley enough time to close the metal door before his legs gave out and he fell to the floor with an high pitched roar. He slapped his hands onto face and screamed again, and again and again after that. He screamed until his throat was hoarse._

_When he brought his hands down he was startled to see they were wet. He studied the liquid with a mixture of shock and exhilaration. Was he…? He brought a finger towards his cheek and traced the wetness up to his eye. He was crying. But…it didn__'__t feel wrong, or shameful._

_Killed her. He had killed her. His own mother, the one person who could have loved him, who could have protected him from Hojo, he had murdered her. He was right all along, he wasn__'__t human, he wasn__'__t meant to be loved by anyone, he saw to that himself. Hojo was right to mock him, to call him names. He was a failure, a plague._

_He curled his arms around his stomach and lay on the floor, bringing his knees up towards his chin and sobbing into them. He was so weak, he was so pathetic. Crying like a baby on the floor. Why was he so unhappy? He shouldn__'__t be surprised. The professor had always said he was alone, that he would be worthless unless he could prove himself. He shouldn__'__t be surprised._

_So why was he crying?_

_He rocked himself back and forth on the floor, feeling his vision become blurry from the after effect of the injection he had been given. His arm throbbed and the constant hiccups were making him nauseous. He shut his eyes tightly, willing all his emotions away as he tried to find peace._

_Some day he would be strong, he would be adored by the world. People would fall over each other trying to get him to simply notice them, to look at them. He wouldn__'__t be worthless then, he wouldn__'__t be an embarrassment. He would be a God._

_Everyone would love Sephiroth._

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_He chuckled bitterly at the memory, that night had changed his life. It was when he had stopped doing what everyone told him simply because he had to, and began doing them so he would achieve his own goal._

_He sighed; some goal. He had achieved what he wanted; he became the most powerful, man in the world. A living legend, leader of the Shinra army, scourge of Wutia, a God among men. Everyone loved him, adored him, and wanted to be him._

_But he wasn__'__t a child anymore, and he knew now that all of that would never be enough. It didn__'__t matter if everyone and __everything__ on the planet loved him. It wasn__'__t real. It wasn__'__t enough. What good was all this respect and adoration when every person he encountered was a sniveling, bumbling insect not worthy of his consideration? Angeal and… Genesis were the only real people in his life, but they just weren__'__t enough. _

_That didn__'__t matter anymore anyway. Only one person mattered to him now; one blue-eyed boy. His special boy._

_He smiled as images of his blond drifted through his mind, masking the ugliness of the place he now walked through. Midgar really was a disgusting city, the decrepit, vacant areas were full of drugs, disease, crime, monsters…sex. He would kill his boy if he ever caught him in such a place as this. Not literally of course._

_He had been sent here to terminate a Moth-slasher who had been causing trouble for the people living in the estates nearby. The beast was long dead, and now he was just slaking his bloodlust with any creature he could find._

_A Pteryx suddenly jumped in front of him and he brought his Katana forward in order to block it. He could have easily killed the creature but he let it attack him a few more times, dodging and flicking about until he grew bored and cut it in half, savoring the hiss of its body dematerializing. He couldn__'__t help but envision a pair of violet eyes as the sound diminished._

"_Does that make you happy?" He turned quickly, his Katana held ready to offer a devastating blow. He lowered it when he saw the person standing, unafraid, in front of him. "Sephiroth?"_

_The girl__'__s eyes were just as eerily transparent as they had been in the flower shop, but they seemed to glow even brighter in the darkness. He ran his eyes over her form, noticing how she was still dressed in the pink dress, making her look so obviously out of place in the dull, green surroundings._

"_How much more are you going to kill?" The girl tilted her head, looking at him with such a sincere sort of sadness he felt his stomach clench uncomfortably._

"_As much as I have to." He answered back softly, looking down at his weapon now leaning on the ground. He could feel her nodding._

"_You__won__'__t find happiness Sephiroth, not that way." She took a step towards him but stopped when he turned and walked a few feet away from her, keeping his eyes set ahead of him._

"_You ar__e not__ a normal human." He stated, purposefully ignoring her statement. "Where do you come from?"_

"_I come from where you come from, where everyone comes from. It'__s not important where we come from Sephiroth; it__'__s where we go that matters." The girl soft voice was musical and floated through the air, carrying her message gently to his ears. He didn__'__t want the words to affect him, he didn__'__t want to listen, but he couldn__'__t help it. That force. There was a force around this girl that penetrated him._

_It only matters where we go…_

_This girl had no idea the lengths he would go to build the future he desired._

"_You are quite brave, girl, to wander down here alone." He turned towards her, his__Masamune raised slightly from the ground. He brought his eyes up to hers and was impressed to see her unwavering gaze._

"_I do not fear__death; this planet is just one of the soul__'__s destinations." She answered, bringing her hands up to her chest. She looked at him imploringly._

"_Please don'__t harm Cloud." He took a step forward, eyes glowing with anger and stopped less than a few feet from her._

"_You thread dange__rous water. You__'__re interest in my affairs will end now." He brought his hand out and touched the end of one of her bangs, satisfied when he drew a small gasp from her._

_And then he was gone before she could catch her breath._

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"Uh…we aint got much at the moment." Reno muttered as he opened the fridge door and peered inside.

"It's okay. Whatever's fine." Zack shrugged, pulling out a stool and letting himself fall heavily onto it. Reno nodded, his eyes still scanning the shelves.

"Well lemme see then…" The redhead clicked his tongue repeatedly as he bent down to open the freezer door.

"Aha!" He exclaimed seconds later, ascending from his search with a frost sprinkled box in his hand. "This'll do." Zack looked at the pizza with a frown.

"Will it take long?" He questioned as the other brought it over to the counter and began to open it, first removing it from the box and then pulling the plastic wrapping off of it in an untidy, boorish manner, letting the rubbish fall on the ground.

"Couple a minutes." Reno replied as he bent to open the oven door and then put the Pizza in without a tray. Zack would have used a tray to stop the cheese from melting down on the grill but he didn't voice his thoughts, he wanted this over with as soon as possible so he could go back out and resume his searching. He couldn't stand just sitting idly, though it seemed to be what everyone expected of him.

"So," Reno muttered as he turned and leaned back against the wall counter, the light from the window shining behind him and making his hair flicker in gold and orange; like fire. Zack could tell that he was trying to act casual but his body language and expression gave away the fact that he was clearly uncomfortable. He didn't blame him; he had been prone to snapping at people lately.

"They didn't get anything from the people they questioned about Clarence." He said, deciding that there was no point in having awkward conversations revolving around the avoidance of the topic at hand. He wasn't interested in anything else and Reno knew that. "They had his parents in, and his co-workers. None of them had any idea about anything when this first came out, and they're even less helpful now."

"Yeah?" Reno asked, narrowing his eyes in thought. "Didn't the guy have any friends or some'tin? Ex's? They'd tell ya a shit load more than his parents could. They'd know what kind of shit he was really inta."

"I don't think it matters." Zack said, and sighed afterwards. "Clarence is dead. So what good would any of that information be?"

"Well," the redhead looked towards the ceiling in thought. "Could be… Maybe someone wanted revenge. Y'know? Blamed Cloud for him offing himself." He looked at Zack and raised his eyebrows.

"Well," Zack rubbed his thumb against his chin as he considered the idea. He had already thought of that himself and asked his uncle about it. "According to Angeal Clarence didn't have any friends in Midgar. Let alone lovers. So there's no lead there unless something comes out. Guy was a lab rat, he just seem to have worked and then went home. Every night." He finished his sentence with a scoff. "And we know what he did there."

"Fucked up freak." Reno agreed, tapping his foot against the ground in a quick beat. "Hm, well I just dunno then." He sighed.

"Another theory is that the media coverage made Cloud a target. Someone saw him, liked what he saw…" Zack ground his teeth together and pressed his hand into the surface of the island counter. "If that's true. I swear…" He shook his head, his body tingling with frustration at not having a vent for the constant anger he was feeling.

"Wh-" Reno was cut off when the oven dinged behind him. He pushed himself away from the counter and sought the badly stained oven gloves hanging on the edge of the sink. Zack watched him go about taking the pizza out and preparing it. His mind instantly went back to all the times he and Cloud had hung out like this, at either of their apartments, eating food and just relaxing. It was so hard to think that it had all been leading up to this. If he had known…

The boy rubbed at the bridge of his nose and took a few deep breaths. Don't lose it. Don't lose it.

"Here we are…" Reno drawled as he placed one plate in front of him and the other in his own place. "S'hot." He warned as he took a seat on a stool across from the dark haired boy.

There were a few minutes of silence in which both boys took tentative bites of their slices and got wrapped up in their own thoughts. Reno was the first to break it.

"Uh, the police…" he started and Zack looked up at him in askance. "They're chek'n the slums, yeah?"

"Obviously." Zack replied with narrowed eyes, "why wouldn't they?" Reno waved his pizza slice in front of him and shook his head.

"No I know they are… Did ya ever hear em say an'tin 'bout a shit called Corneo. Don Corneo?" Zack scanned his head for the name, finding it only distantly familiar.

"Don Corneo?" He muttered under his breath, "He's… some drug gang lord or something?"

"Kind'a." The redhead nodded, "he's a crime lord. Big, big name in the slums. Big provider of dust, pharmaceuticals and other crap to the shithole. Not much different from the other scumbags down there 'sept fer one thing." He paused and tapped his fingers against the countertop.

"What's that?" Zack asked, his pizza forgotten on his plate as he listened to the other boy. Any information he could get relating to Cloud's disappearance was valuable to him. Even if it came from Reno. Though Zack had always suspected the guy to be more than he let on.

"Supposidly Corneo's real claim to fame comes from his more debauched business. S'called HoneyBees or some shit like that. A sex trafficking industry that specializes in providing boys an' girls for the pleasure of the patron. An' from what I hear, some rough shit goes on in those holes." Reno gave Zack a dark look. He tilted his head a bit.

"Rough shit?" He repeated, although he had a fairly good idea what he meant. Reno nodded.

"Immigration, kidnapping, drugs and that. Said as well tha some of the clients can make requests and the Don will fulfill them."

"Sick bastards." Zack spat in disgust, his stomach churning at the though. Just the idea of Cloud… Gaia, he couldn't handle that. "Well," he said, trying to distract himself. "If this is so well known, why wouldn't the police shut it down?" At this, Reno snorted.

"Aint that well known in this part of the city. An the police… Shinra police. From what I hear the 'authorities' benefit more with the place open. In a number of ways." Another dark look and then the boy sat back and picked up his food again. Zack took in the words for a few seconds, thinking them over. Eventually he looked up at Reno and gave him a narrow-eyed look.

"How do you know so much about this, exactly? If it's not well known?" At this, a slight smirk slipped across the other boy's face.

"Got ma ways." He said ominously. His interest piqued, Zack was going to ask more questions but he was interrupted by his phone ringing. He quickly pulled it out of his pocket, almost dropping it in his haste, and when he saw that the person calling was Angeal he practically slammed it against his ear.

"H-Hello," he said, perhaps too loudly. Reno watched on with wide eyes but both boys slumped a bit when Zack sighed.

"Yeah." He said, "Pizza. Any ne- what? Why? But I want to keep looking around for… Uh I'll just ring them tomorrow or. No. No. Okay. Okay alright. Yeah, bye." The short conversation was concluded with him slamming the phone down onto the table.

"Trouble?" Reno questioned, watching the boy make a series of angry faces as he thought over something. Zack shrugged.

"My 'parents' want to video call me tonight. I've to be home at seven. Gaia…"He ran a hand through his hair and leaned on the counter. "That's the last thing I need now."

They were both quiet for a few minutes, but eventually Reno broke it by sucking in a breath and muttering.

"…Least you have parents." Zack looked at him and he gave a sheepish grin. "Just say'n."

"They barely warrant the title." Zack retorted. "They call every few months to check in. That's it. It's usually just to lecture me about this and that as well."

"Well a bit of advice buddy," the redhead said. "I'd have a shower, fix myself up a bit. Else they're gonna be call'n a lot more ta make sure ya aint keeled over."

"Yeah," Zack nodded, lifting some of the greasy hair from his forehead. He just had it all slicked back in a ponytail now. He honestly couldn't remember the last time he'd showered. He didn't care either. It was far from the list of his priorities. In fact, there was no list. There was only one thing written on a blank piece of paper.

Find Cloud.

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"_**And that'**__**s all for tonight, from myself and the rest of the**__**'**__**Midgar News Team**__**'**__**Goodnight."**_

Cloud shut the television off, feeling frustrated and despondent at the information it supplied him. He was never going to be found; they weren't even close. The police and detectives dealing with his case seemed to have taken the angle that his kidnapping had been one of many by some crime gangs around the city and Cloud knew that no one had any idea otherwise. The reporter had mentioned that the situation with Clarence had been taken into consideration but it seemed as though the authorities thought that the media attention he had received from that case may have made him a target for trafficking gangs. He felt like screaming; how could they be so stupid? He should just admit it was hopeless now; after all, how many times had he watched a report about a case like his and actually believed the person would be retrieved and live happily ever after? Never.

He sighed and uncrossed his legs, feeling goose bumps prickle his skin. He was a bit cold, probably because his hair was still damp from the shower he had taken a while ago and he only had the thin, pale garments to cover him. He was tempted to crawl back under the covers of the bed but decided not to; he couldn't spend another second lying down, it was making him too depressed, not that he could go anywhere in this room that wouldn't make him depressed but he felt more alive sitting up and doing normal things like showering and changing clothes, even if he would still have to stay in his prison and wear it's uniform.

The creaking of the door brought him out of his musing and he turned his head quickly towards the stairs, feeling his stomach tighten as it always did when the man visited him. He sat up straight and made sure that as much of his skin was covered as possible while Sephiroth made his way, languidly, down the steps. Cloud noticed there was no plate in his hand, which meant he was visiting for a different reason. That made him even more nervous.

Sephiroth stepped soundlessly onto the carpet and then raked his eyes over his boys form.

"You're looking much better today love. I had feared you would go a whole week without washing." Cloud pursed his lips and looked away, angry at the others pleasure. He didn't want to make his captor happy, he wanted to make him feel all the sadness and anxiety he forced on him.

"Not talking today then?" Sephiroth walked over to him, bending down once he reached where he was sitting on the floor. He placed a non-gloved hand on top of his head and left it there, lightly feeling the damp spikes. Cloud stiffened but kept his face lowered.

"I think you're sick of this room, would you like to get out of it for a few hours?" He pulled his hand back when Cloud's head snapped up, staring at him with a startled and slightly untrusting expression.

"What?"

"Would you like to leave the room for a while?"

"Wh- where would I go?" Cloud didn't know what Sephiroth was up to. Leave the room? The prison he had been confined to for almost two weeks? It didn't make sense.

Sephiroth chuckled, holding his hand out towards the door.

"Upstairs, I'll show you some of our house. Then we can see about some food for you." He dropped his hand and smiled at the boy. "What do you think?"

Cloud shivered at the world 'our'. This wasn't his home, this was just a place he was trapped in, he had a room already and he would still be there if it weren't for this monster. But… he really was enticed by the offer, the thought of getting out, even for a while would be blissful, plus he could gather more of his surroundings, maybe even form a plan to escape. He was still cautious though; his captor wasn't going to give him something for nothing.

"I…okay." He stretched out his legs and ascended to his feet.

"Yes?" Sephiroth smiled, holding out his hand to help him up. Cloud ignored him and stoodup with the aid of the wall, taking a few steps away from the man who in return just looked amused.

Cloud waited for him to move and when he didn't he shook his head, annoyed.

"What?" He tried to sound firm but the fear he was feeling made his voice soft and desperate.

"After you," Sephiroth said with a mocking grand gesture. He watched the boy frown, probably wanting him to go first. He eventually conceded, crossing his arms and moving in front of him. Sephiroth kept two paces back from the boy, secretly enjoying the view as the boy walked tensely up the stairs.

Cloud stopped when he reached the door, feeling terribly afraid all of a sudden. Why was Sephiroth taking him out here? Did he have something horrible planned? Was this the moment of his murder? His heart rose to his chest quickly, making him feel nauseous. He couldn't trust anything here.

Sephiroth saw the boy become pale and then start to shake; he bent forward and put his hand on his shoulders.

"It's okay," he said, but Cloud opened his mouth, looking like he couldn't catch his breath. He leaned forward and placed his lips next to the boy's ear, the scent of his shampoo strong in his newly washed hair. "Nothing here is going to harm you." He kissed the boys temple and then urged him forward.

Cloud let himself be pushed, until he stood against the door. He brought his hand up and was going to shove the door open but Sephiroth's strong arm brushed against his cheek and bet him to it. He waited for the man to pull back his hand before swallowing and taking a step through the threshold.

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Sky flicked her thumb against her top teeth as she stared at the wall. The tea Shera had left for her was cooling on the coffee table, the steam rising and swirling above the china cup, ignored.

Her pale eyes moved back and forth as the thoughts ran through her head. Where was her boy? He was out there somewhere, she could feel it. But where? She needed to know. There was nothing like this feeling. This painful emptiness in her soul.

She was no stranger to pain or fear, years of living and waiting for death while her body was torn apart and withered by an agonizing illness had made sure of that. She had accepted she would die, but she had still been terrified.

Now though, now she truly understood that death was nothing to fear. It was ridiculous. Why fear such a thing as death, when life could be so much worse? To lose her child, for him to be taken away from her and kept hidden from her sight. There was nothing like it. It was just too painful to describe.

Every morning she woke up to the same feeling of yearning. She literally ached to see her son again. For him to just walk in the door and talk to her. She needed his voice, it was all she wanted to hear. Her baby. Her little blond boy, who she had been with every day of his life. He was her baby, always was and always would be.

Did she appreciate him enough, had she spent enough time with him? This fear she felt for his loss, was that what he had been feeling for her all these years? Had she comforted him enough? Explained her thoughts and shared her fears with him so he wouldn't feel alone? Was he being taken from her as punishment? She had been self-centered with her illness, never fully paying attention to how it was affecting him. She'd been given one chance at motherhood, and failed so miserably at the challenge that it almost seemed poetic for the planet to take him back.

Her whole face tensed up as tears spilled from her eyes, she wiped at her nose with the back of her wrist, grinding her teeth to stop the sobs.

The doorbell rang suddenly, and she contemplated ignoring it for a few minutes before deciding to pull herself together and just answer it. It could be someone with news.

As she painfully got to her feet she wiped at her eyes and smoothed her hair, which was tied into a bun, back against her scalp.

"Just a minute." She called out as she slowly made her way to the door, clutching the shawl around her shoulders. Her bones were hurting, perhaps more than they ever had before. She was starting to fade.

"Elmyra."

Her eyes widened in surprise once she pulled the door open. The woman in question smiled softly, her dark blue eyes showing a sincere kind of sadness that very few possessed.

"Sky." Her hoarse voice all but whispered. Sky swallowed thickly and moved aside to let the woman enter.

"These are for you." As she passed, Elmyra handed her a bouquet of yellow flowers tied off with a strip of pink ribbon. "They are… among the last patch."

Elmyra was of a similar age to Sky, although one mightn't have believed it if they were to compare the two. While Sky's skin had become thin and lined with sickness, pale to an extent that it was almost grey, Elmyra's was smooth and vibrant and tough from the story of her life. Her blue eyes were large and bright with only some very small lines of age at the side which appeared to have deepened in the last few months. Sky's own eyes had deep crow's feet surrounding them as well as dark bags beneath. They were both slender, but Sky's was an emaciated kind of frailty which revealed the structure of her bones beneath her skin and made her hunch over, while Elmyra possessed the curves of a well-built woman .

"They're beautiful." Sky answered, bringing the plants to her nose and inhaling. She was surprised by the way the scent ran through her body; soothing her aches and making her feel a bit more comfortable. She took them away from her face moments later and opened her eyes.

"Please, sit." Her thin hand extended towards the patched sofa. Elmyra nodded and made her way over, smoothing her green dress over her knees as she took a seat. Her ash-blond hair tied was tied back in a smooth bun.

Sky joined her a moment later, placing the flowers down on the table.

"I don't know where Shera keeps the vases, she'll be back soon." Elmyra shook her head and brushed off the others concerns.

"It's no problem, they'll keep." She explained, giving a strange, proud look at the plants.

"They are beautiful." Sky said again.

"They are." The other agreed, smiling softly. Sky looked down at her lap for a minute, before moving to cover the others hand with her own. The difference in them was startlingly obvious.

"Elmyra." She began; her voice urgent and strained. "I did not comfort you as I should have. All those months ago. It is only now that I truly understand what you went through. And I feel terrible that it took this to make me see-"

"Hush." Elmyra gave her a stern look, moving her hands so she was holding the blonde's. "Do not think about that now. You have no reason to feel guilty. You were a great friend to me at that time. But I couldn't have bared anyone then. I felt that I was the only one on this planet in so much grief. That no such thing as comfort existed."

"Such terrible things happen, and we are unaware." Sky closed her eyes, tears running down her hollowed cheeks. "I cannot bear the thought."

"But you must understand." Elmyra started. "How lucky you are." Sky opened her eyes.

"Lucky?" She questioned, looking at the woman with a hysterical kind of disbelief. Elmyra's slightly wrinkled eyes squinted together as she nodded.

"You still have hope. I did not." She began, squeezing her hands around the other's fingers. They were callous and warm and comfortable. "When they found my Aerith…" She closed her eyes for a minute, as though waiting for a headache to fade away. "When they found her like that. There was nothing I could do. She was simply gone. In one second it was over."

Sky pressed her lips together and nodded.

"I wouldn't have survived that." She whispered. Elmyra chuckled, although it had a bitter rasp to it.

"I almost didn't." Her eyes opened again and she looked at the blond with determined eyes. "But understand, you do have hope. They have not found him yet. He may come back to you."

"And he may not." Sky's voice dead toned, lowering a few octaves. "And for the rest of my life, I will wonder about him. I will wonder what he has suffered, what he has been forced to…"

"You think that I don't wonder the same." Elmyra released her hands and stood up, her green dress falling below her knees. She walked over to the mantelpiece, idly looking over the framed photos. Her eyes seeing something else.

"Who did it? Why did they do it? Was she afraid? Was she in pain for long? Alone on the ground? What was her last thought? But…" Her eyes were half closed and dazed as she spoke, a strange, weary smile on her face. "Although she wasn't my blood, we shared a deep connection. And I still feel that now. She doesn't want me to suffer, and so I try not to."

Sky listened, her chapped lips pressed together in a thoughtful expression.

"A terrible thing has befallen us both." She said, slowly standing up herself. "It is the way of this world that we must suffer."

Elmyra turned to her, her hands still placed on the mantelpiece. Her eyes were wet.

"And I fear… that I will not be around to see the end of this." The sickly woman pressed an open hand to her chest, above her breast. "I grow weaker every day, and it's getting harder to catch my breath. Do you think I should look forward to death? Will he be there?"

"…" Elmyra smoothed her hair back again and walked over to her, her eyes open and unblinking. "I wouldn't know." She admitted, her fingers twisting in the edges of her sleeves.

"No," Sky murmured, nodding.

"But if you do leave this world. You will be with my daughter. I hope you'll find company in one another."

More tears slid down Sky's face as she heard the words.

"But who?" She started through sobs, "will he find company with." Her shoulders shook as the ash-haired woman hurried over to her and placed her arms around them. Sky began to sob heavily, holding her hands to her face.

"My son. My boy. My son. All alone somewhere. I can't bear it." She moaned, shaking her head. She was walked over to the couch by the other woman and coaxed to sit down.

Elmyra stayed with her until Shera returned, listening to her sobs and moans and offering nothing only her silent company. Her own tears were spilling down her cheeks, almost like ribbons against her flesh.

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Cherubs.

Things that could only be seen in dreams drifted across his eyes, as real as his own skin. They were carrying strumpets and frankincense across the sky, their small little wings fluttering cheerily on their backs as they floated. The smiled at him, their pudgy child-adult faces telling him that it was okay, that they would protect him. Angels of happiness. There was music playing in his head and he looked across to see a woman with long crimson hair stretching out at her sides in curls. She was sitting on a purple apple, playing a strange golden harp that hardly covered her nude body. That was the source of it, her thin fingers plucking deftly on the strings. She was crying though, and the odd looking people at her side were laughing dementedly.

There was a crowd of them, all naked, groping and pulling at each other's flesh and baring themselves to their pleasure. The frenzied looks on their faces as they enjoyed their sins, the small cherubs flying around them; such a contrast. It was a euphoria he didn't know of. The sky behind them was as blue as it ever could be, but there were so many tumbling clouds' covering it that it was only really teased at. They all used the clouds as cushions and seats, molding them into different shapes and covering them with scarlet and mauve throws and golden chains. Cornucopias', goblets and crystal dishes of fruit were strung around them and held in their hands. The food and drink just another source of pleasure.

He could hear the crying woman playing the harp, and wondered if she wept because of the ugly beauty of it all, or because she knew she didn't belong there. She was forced to be there, to play at their whim for all eternity.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" The music stopped and he jerked his head towards his captor again, the fuzziness diminishing from his mind like residing static.

"Yes." He whispered, forgetting for a moment who he was talking to.

Sephiroth smiled and walked up to him.

"Good. I'm glad you approve." He quickly reached down and grabbed they boy's hand, holding it in his. Cloud became flustered and tried to pull the limb back, something Sephiroth was not allowing.

"Don't..," but Sephiroth grabbed it more firmly and began walking, forcing Cloud to follow or be dragged.

The place… felt like a different world. He continued to look around as he was pulled forward, running his eyes over the tall walls. Their immaculate white sheen mixed with the golden glow from the wall lamps, making them look blindingly surreal. He mouth lay open as he brought his eyes down to see that even the floor he stood on was as pristine as ivory beneath his bare feet. It was beautiful; he had never been in a place like this before, it was like a palace from a book; an ice castle. He dragged his eyes back to the wall, noticing the pattern of the tiles which had just led him up to the ceiling like a path.

They passed through another beautiful hallway, decorated with more white tiles and a golden border through the middle; he looked to the left and saw a huge, winding staircase with gleaming tiled steps and a dark banister. This wasn't a just house; it was a mansion.

Sephiroth relished in the feeling of the small fingers between his, he squeezed lightly and smiled back at the boy who had apparently been distracted by the glamour of the place since the moment he'd stepped out of his room. He himself had gotten used to fine living and his homes were always the very best, so it was hard for him to appreciate the house the way people like Cloud would. It pleased him to see that the boy was impressed by something he owned. He looked particularly young in his wonder, his eyes as wide as materia orbs and his lips parted in astonishment.

However, when they stopped in front of a large closed door Cloud became nervous again. He tried to pull his hand, which was now damp with sweat, from the grip but his captor still wouldn't' budge so he just let it go limp and kept his eyes on the door.

Sephiroth turned to him and crouched down so he could look him in the eye. His hair spilled down over his face, shadowing it in that menacing way.

"I thought it would be best for us to just relax tonight, forget all of this…drama. I've gotten some films to watch, and some food. I don't want any theatrics Cloud." He gave the boy a pointed look which received a slight glare in return. "We are going to spend a pleasant evening together."

Cloud wanted to tell him where to shove his pleasant evening but he didn't have the nerve and just remained sickened and silent as the other kissed his hand once, his lips lingering on his fingers for a second too long, before standing up and opening the doors.

Cloud tried to remain impassive as he was led into another amazing room; a living room this time. He figured that the smallest item in this room probably cost more than his whole apartment had, everything from the rich, red couch to the thirty-two inch plasma screen television was the best of the best, he could tell. He looked across the coffee table to see a huge mahogany fireplace and a fire roasting away within its center. This room was warm, not just the temperature but the theme, and it was totally different from the other parts of the house he had seen so far. He looked to his left and spotted a tall set of thick brown curtains drawn together.

A sense of dizziness swept over him as he considered the fact that behind those curtains there was a window. And behind the window there was the outside. It was so close… it was just… there.

Sephiroth led his charge to the couch, urging him to sit down. Cloud did as he was told; sitting stiffly and wringing his hands on his lap once they were both free. He looked at the dark-wood coffee-table in front of him, running his eyes over the few dishes laid out on it. Celery sticks with dips, chocobo fillets, and other snack food. He felt like shaking his head at his kidnapper's effort. Snacks and a movie wouldn't't change anything.

Sephiroth walked over to the television, feeling slightly uncomfortable. He normally didn't indulge in such common activities as television-viewing but he needed to find a way to interact with Cloud at his level. He was not sure what kind of films teenagers liked to watch and what foods they considered 'snack' foods. It was all completely alien to him, and he felt somewhat foolish for his ignorance. He had to try, however, Cloud had given up a lot for him so he could at least risk a bit of his own dignity in return. Plus, sitting close to Cloud for a few hours could never be a bad thing.

He picked up three boxes and studied the covers before bringing them over to the boy.

"Which one do you like?" Cloud gave a half-hearted glance at the selections before shrugging. Sephiroth frowned, his own self-consciousness irritating him. "Choose."

Cloud felt his heart-rate rise and then fear sweep through him again, not that it had ever really left. He moved his hand and pointed a finger towards the first DVD, not actually looking to see what it was. Sephiroth either ignored his lack of enthusiasm or didn't notice it as he smiled and kissed the boy on the cheek, chuckling when he leaned back sharply.

"Alright." The tall man said well humoredly, standing up and going to the television again.

Once the DVD was inserted Sephiroth looked back at Cloud. He frowned at how miserable the teen looked; as unhappy as he sat there like a frightened little animal on the patterned cushions. He wanted to show the boy that not everything had to be bad and dramatic with him, that they could simply spend a night together watching a film, like a normal couple. But Cloud was just so determined to hate everything at the moment. It was more difficult than he had anticipated.

He walked around to the back of the couch, until he was directly behind the blond, and then lent forward, bracing his weight on the cushioned back. Cloud didn't look at him but he could he could see him square his shoulders.

"Cloud," he whispered, "you don't have to be frightened. I don't want to harm you, I want the opposite. I want to ensure nothing ever causes you pain again. Please don't try to ignore me." He ran his fingers along the boy's cheek, feeling the bones twitch. He sighed, kissed the top of Cloud's blond head and then stood up.

"I know you don't like coffee or tea so I've made some hot chocolate for you. It's not that cheap stuff I've seen you buy before either, it's real chocolate. Imported from Mideel." As he spoke he made his way over to a small corner table where the contents resided. The sound of thick liquid spilling from expensive steel filled the room, only joined by the cackling of the fire.

Cloud blew out a breath as his captor approached him again, holding a steaming mug in his hands. Sephiroth sat beside him and coaxed the mug into his grasp. Cloud winced a little at the heat emanating from the china.

"Careful." Sephiroth warned, pulling his hands back when he thought the boy had grasped the cup correctly. He sat back and gave what he hoped to be a comforting look.

"Doesn't't this feel as it should?" He placed one arm along the back of the seat and left the other limply on his lap as he spoke. "Here." He felt atypically emotional so he took a deep breath to calm himself. It was just so…perfect. This night, this room, his young lover warmed by the orange hue of the blazing fire, the snow falling silently outside them. It was everything he had wanted. _Almost_ everything anyway.

Cloud grew wary of the other's intense attention and brought his eyes down to the cup he had lowered to his lap. He couldn't't stop his mouth from watering at the sight and smell of the beverage. Hot chocolate had always been a weakness for him, and despite what Sephiroth thought he actually loved the store bought stuff. His mother used to make that for him all the time and he never seemed to be able to make it quite as nice as she did, even though he copied her _every_ move.

He forgot himself for a second and smiled at the memory.

Sephiroth didn't catch the expression, attention set on the television as it was. He pressed the play button and the room went silent for a moment as the film began. He heard Cloud take a sip from the cup and smiled to himself. Encouraged, he reached forward, grabbing a plate of celery sticks and placed it between them on the sofa.

However, after ten minutes he became annoyed and slightly embarrassed when the food wasn't touched. He halted the film, growing more agitated when he realized that Cloud didn't even notice; he was looking off to the side somewhere. Ignoring him, ignoring his efforts.

"Are you not hungry, Cloud?"

The teen looked at him, startled, before shaking his head. "You're lying." He smirked when his boy let out a loud breath.

"I don't feel like eating." Cloud bit out, Sephiroth noticed his hands, which clutched the mug tightly, were shaking again.

"It's very rude to refuse food that has been prepared for you." The older man kept his voice light, adding to the chilling effect of his words, Cloud swallowed down the fear as he answered.

"I didn't ask you to prepare anything."

"Behave yourself Cloud." Sephiroth's voice dropped an octave. Cloud swallowed but refused to give in.

"I…" his captor cut him off by moving forward swiftly and trapping him against the arm of the couch; he took the cup out of the boy's hands and placed it down on the table. Cloud held his breath as a long finger was pressed against his lips.

"Hush," Sephiroth drawled, he moved his digit over the shut lips and looked into the wide blue eyes. "I don't want to argue tonight, we are going to have a peaceful night together and you are not ruining it. Understand?" Cloud just looked at him glumly.

"Understand?" He repeated with more force, squeezing a thin bicep.

"Okay." Cloud winced at the pressure on his arm. He sighed when the man released him.

"Good boy." Sephiroth's volatile mood changed again as he smiled and brushed his hand through the boy's fringe, patting them out of his eyes. He turned but didn't move away from him as he picked the remote up and started the film again.

Cloud regretted his decision to leave 'his' room, he had thought that a change of scenery would make him feel better but it didn't, it almost made him feel worse to see that his new hell extended beyond just one room. He looked to his left, at the curtain he knew would conceal a window. It was strange for him to think that the outside world was so close to him, less than a couple of feet, and there was no way he could get to it. Especially when a powerful arm slid around his neck, fingers brushing against his cheek. He was trapped, a hairsbreadth and a mile from freedom all in one.

Sephiroth watched the boy as he looked at back him, confused and annoyed.

"Relax," he whispered, "don't think about anything. You're upsetting yourself."

Cloud wanted to laugh at that. As if he could just turn his mind off and 'enjoy' himself when he wanted. Did this man really think his problems were so fickle? He could scream from frustration. He felt fingers on his cheek and his face was turned to the right. He didn't have time to take a breath as his lips were captured by the man again. He hated when Sephiroth did this to him. He was taking liberties with a body that couldn't't defend itself. It wasn't fair. The kiss only lasted a few seconds and Cloud kept his mouth and eyes shut until it was over. He couldn't't stand this. The feeling and the taste. It made him extremely uncomfortable.

Sephiroth pulled the reluctant boy closer to his side, making him grunt, and turned back towards the film playing.

With nothing else to do Cloud turned his attention to the television while keeping as much weight off Sephiroth as he could in order to reduce the contact. It felt odd to be watching something that wasn't the news, something that wasn't about his situation. It depressed him to think that the world was still moving on without him, that every single person on the planet wasn't trying their hardest to find him. It was a silly thought, he knew, but he didn't want to know how insignificant he really was.

The movie was a strange, alternate universe one about the planet as it was but without any magic at all. No lifestream or crystals or sky pirates. Cloud thought it was horrible, who would want to live in a world with no materia, or Moogle's, or magical creatures? Just humans living in a miserable, corporate world where money and material wealth were the epitome of happiness. In the movie the existence of the jaded people was coming to an end as the women had become infertile. Cloud tried to think of a world without children, imagining how bad it would be, but then he realized that he may never hear a child's laughter again anyway, or experience any of the magic he so loved. He felt his stomach sink, from his thoughts, or was it because the man beside him began to softly run his hand up and down the side of his arm? He didn't know.

He tried to block out his depressing thoughts and actually managed to get into the plot of the film. He was just at the part where the jaded hero was hiding out in an elderly couples house, the man was quite funny and quirky and was taking care of his wife, a very sick woman who-

Sephiroth sat up in confusion when he heard Cloud let out a choked gasp. He pulled back as the boy quickly leaned forward and covered his face with his hand, a most awful wheezing sound beginning to emanate from him His chest and stomach started to move in and out at an alarmingly rapid speed, as if he was struggling to get air .

"Cloud?" Worried, he put his hand on the trembling back but it only made the boy more hysterical. He lurched forward and heaved loudly, high pitched choking sounds coming from his throat. Sephiroth grimaced and caught his shoulders. "Come here." he pulled the boy up but Cloud struggled with him, shaking his head and keeping his eyes covered.

"Stop it. Cloud. Take a breath." He ordered, taking a firm hold on his arms and restraining him as best he could. The boy's body flailed in his grip as he continued to gasp and struggle for air, his skin turning a dark shade of red. "Listen to me. Take a breath."

"Ica-." Cloud gasped, his hands scratching at the collar of his shirt and his chest. "I cant- I ca-nt bre-ath."

"Listen. Take a breath. Relax yourself." But again he was ignored and Cloud became even more hysterical. He clenched his teeth together and bent the boy forward, his own worry making him impatient. "You're panicking. Just slow your breathing."

"No. I ca-nt. I need-" the teen couldn't't talk, he couldn't catch a breath. Tears were streaming down his flushed cheeks as he struggled with an invisible noose. He could feel his lungs burning with the effort and his vision was crowded with white and red speckles. Something was really wrong with him, he couldn't breathe. Something was making him choke. The man had done something. He'd drugged his drink. It had been poisoned. He was trying to kill him now. That's why he brought him out. And he would bury him somewhere that no one would ever find. Or feed him to monsters. This was it. He was dying now. He was dying. His head was getting light.

"Take a breath." Sephiroth repeated loudly. He pushed the boy forward until he was entirely bent over, his forehead at his knees. "Relax. Breath."

"N- hosp-ital." Cloud shook his head, clutching at his hair. He didn't know why Sephiroth was shouting at him. He couldn't hear what he was trying to say. He needed a doctor or he was going to die. He was already dying. He would never see anyone again. Everything was over.

"Breath. Cloud. Slow you're breathing."

What? Why was he saying that? He couldn't breathe. He couldn't slow down. He was suffocating. He couldn't get any air.

But he did as he was asked, desperate to try anything to get rid of this feeling. He closed his mouth and took in a breath through his blocked nose. It… helped. He did it again, opening his mouth this time and finding with relief that he was able to get some air into his lungs. The dizziness began to fade slowly, the pressure flowing from his brain.

As the boy eventually started to calm down, Sephiroth rubbed at his back and murmured words of comfort, coaching him on how to gain his breath back. About fifteen minutes later, the boy was out of danger, though his attack had been replaced by loud sobbing. He rested his head against his knees as he cried. Really crying.

"I want to go home." He said. Sephiroth clicked his tongue.

"Hush."

"I wa-nt to leave here." The teen's voice was hoarse and muffled but the desperation was clear. "Please."

"Shhhh," Sephiroth didn't bother answering, trying instead to calm the youth down. He circled his arms around Cloud, glad that the boy was too upset to resist, and clasped his fingers together against the heaving stomach.

"I miss my mom." Cloud moaned, sniffing heavily, "I want to go home. It's not fair." One of his hands buried into his hair while the other rubbed his eyes repeatedly.

Sephiroth didn't say anything, honestly not knowing what to say, so he just let the boy bleed his feelings out.

"I didn't ha-te my old life. I do-n't want it to be over yet. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"You don't need to-"

"I'm afraid." Cloud finally muttered, swallowing in an attempt to stifle his hiccups.

"You have no reason to be afraid." Sephiroth pressed the boy against him when he chuckled bitterly and shook his head. "You don't."

"I'm afraid I'll never see my mom again. Or my friends. Or anyone." Cloud leaned his head forward. "I'm afraid I'll be stuck here for the rest of my life."

Sephiroth didn't like this conversation; he didn't like hearing just how much Cloud hated living with him. It…hurt. Strangely it actually caused him to feel a sinking sadness in his stomach, something he had never really experienced, as far as he could remember.

"You are staying here." He couldn't't help the bitterness that crept into his voice. Cloud started crying loudly again.

"I know." He whispered in despair, Sephiroth let him go and he leaned against the large arm of the couch, burying his face into it to hide his humiliation.

The General stared at him for a long few minutes before exhaling and shutting off the television completely, feeling despondent that his evening had taken such a disastrous turn.

He decided to leave Cloud wallow and began clearing up the table, bringing all the uneaten food into the kitchen and throwing it in the bin, even though he could have kept it in the fridge. He honestly didn't care. It was all just a waste. He leaned against the counter, grinding his teeth until he thought they would crack as he fisted his hands on the marble and tried to will himself to relax. Why was everything in his life always so…difficult? Yes, he had abducted the teen, but since then he had done nothing but try to make him comfortable, he had made him food, gotten movies, lit a fire. He hadn't done anything bad or harmful; he couldn't understand why the boy was so unhappy as to fall into such a state. What was he doing wrong? What could others do that he couldn't?

Why did Cloud hate him?

He closed his eyes, feeling a small pain behind them. Things had to change; they couldn't go on like this. Cloud was feeling sorry for himself and Sephiroth had been patient, but it had to stop eventually. They couldn't be together like this.

He stood up and pushed his hair out of his face wearily.

Cloud watched the fire's flames lick at the wood, consuming it and turning it to ash. He didn't blink when the salty tears continued to fall from his eyes, they stung slightly but it was nothing compared to the other pain he was feeling. He just felt dead. Like everything good and happy had been taken out of the world and all that was left was fear and pain and sickness. It was like old age, he figured, and he was as depressed and broken as any person awaiting death. His lungs and chest hurt, and the memory of that suffocating feeling terrorized him. He didn't know what that was, why it happened. But it was the most horrible feeling he ever experienced.

He heard Sephiroth entering the room, but he didn't react. He just followed the man with his eyes until came and kneeled in front of him. He didn't move when he reached out and stroked his arm.

"Feeling better?" Sephiroth's voice was smooth but there was something raspy in it. It sounded odd. And his eyes almost looked wet…

He tried not to cry again and shook his head. Gaia, he couldn't stop now.

"Hmm, well just stay here for a while then. I don't think you need to return to your room yet." Sephiroth gave him a strange look, he couldn't decipher its meaning, it was almost angry…but wasn't?

He did as he was told, too weary for anything else. He didn't even protest when Sephiroth sat beside him a lifted his legs so they were draping over his own thighs. The hand on Clouds bare calf both sickened him and reminded him that moving wasn't an option. Even if it didn't look like it, he was still being held prisoner. Nothing Sephiroth could do would change that. He was the monster who had grabbed him and was waiting to eat him up.

The two stayed like that for a long time, not talking and barley moving. White light eventually began to shine through the cracks in the thick curtain but still the two remained there, Cloud kept his gaze towards the fire, watching as the mighty flames died into flickering tendrils and then into small sparks.

In the end all that was left of the attractive spectacle was ash and soot, waiting to be blown into oblivion by the smallest touch or the weakest breath. Nothing stayed strong forever, everything eventually turned weak and soft and vulnerable to manipulation.

Nothing lasted forever.

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**And… I faint.**

**This has been one of the more difficult chapters to write for me. I really want to try and capture the emotional turmoil a situation like this would cause for everyone involved but it's difficult as I haven't experienced anything like this in my own life (Thank God). I hope that the result comes across well, and I hope it was an enjoyable read for all of you. **

**Uhh, I feel so awkward for Sephiroth in this chapter. I was seriously cringing at the thought of him trying to have 'movie night' with Cloud. It so doesn't suit his character and it was…interesting to portray.**

**Anyway, thanks for all the feedback for the last chapter. It makes me feel good to know that you all like the story so far. **

**As usual, please leave a review if you can. I always want to hear what you all have to say.**

**Till next month ;)**


	22. XXII

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

**This fan fiction contains dark, upsetting psychological and sexual themes so if you are not comfortable with that kind of thing then please don't read because I don't want to upset anyone.**

**I didnt have time to edit this chapter so I the grammer might not be the best. Sorry.**

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_Sephiroth tilted his head back, checking the dark area behind him for any sign of life. He smirked when he detected nothing but the expression rapidly morphed into a more disarming smile when the pale coloured door in front of him clicked open._

"_S-Sephiroth, I'm surprised you actually came..." A nervous voice filled the air as its owner looked at him with an almost pity-worthy desperation. Pity. _

"_You thought I would stand you up?" He watched the man practically squirm before him, reviling in his worship. Oh, Clarence. _

_Poor simple Clarence._

"_No, no of course not I just find it strange that… Uh, never mind." The man's pale cheeks dotted with colour as he finally lost the nerve to keep eye contact._

"_I was joking," Sephiroth demurred, giving a small, forced chuckle. Clarence attempted his own smile. His teeth were yellowish and out of alignment. _

"_I see." _

_There was a short few moments of silence before Sephiroth shifted his feet and cleared his throat. The small action got the desired result when Clarence took on an abashed expression and stood back from the doorway._

"_Please," he urged nervously, "come in." The General gave the man a patient smile and did as instructed._

_The hall he stepped into was a small, expensively decorated room. It was minimal in its design, just a glass hall-table and a modern style painting hanging above it. Modern meaning nonsensical. He was urged to walk forward and saw that the rest of the apartment had a similar design. Everything was clean. Extremely clean._

_It seemed his visit had been agonised over._

"_Uh, take a seat. I… Would you like a drink?" He nodded as he walked over to and sat on the small leather sofa, his own attire creaking against it as if greeting a long departed relative. ._

"_Scotch." He mumbled. Clarence nodded and muttered something like 'I'll be a minute' before heading out of the room._

_Sephiroth placed his bag on the ground and took moment to look around the room. The small window was covered by a light grey curtain, which was currently closed. That made him smile. He wanted privacy. He scoped the walls and ceiling for cameras and as he expected there were none, but it was always important to be certain. His eyes dragged along lazily until they stopped on something that caught their interest. He studied the out-of-place brown cabinet in the corner of the room with rising curiosity. Its shabby and cluttered appearance didn't fit in with the otherwise Spartan décor. _

_His leather clothes creaked again as he stood up and walked the small distance across the room. Various framed photographs stood on the shelves, most of them featured a much younger, brighter looking Clarence, in one photo he held an alcoholic beverage in his hand as he stood with a group of equally young people, all smiling at the camera. Another was a more formal still, featuring a young Clarence standing in between an older man and woman, who looked haggard but bright, certainly not from the city. There were many other pictures, and his emerald eyes studied them all as he brushed his fingers against the dusty wood. Besides the pictures there were also several little knick-knacks littering the shelves; souvenirs and small decorated cases. Insignificant little things, really._

"_Oh, I've been meaning to move that into my room." He didn't turn at the other's comment._

"_This is your family?" He murmured._

"_Yeah, yes." He could hear the embarrassment in his victim's voice._

"_Where are you from?" He questioned, though he didn't know why. General curiosity probably. _

"_Junon." He nodded and then turned to regard the man clutching two glasses in his hands._

"_Do you miss it?" Clarence seemed surprised by the question and looked down for a moment._

"_Well, I… Midgar isn't what I expected. But working for Shinra is an honour. Don't you think?" Clarence walked forward and handed him the half full glass. Sephiroth sniffed bitterly._

"_I had no choice." Clarence's' brown eyes squinted, his skin pressing into deep lines above his nose. . _

"_I don't understand." He said. Sephiroth took a quick sip of his drink and then sighed._

"_I don't have a home town, or a family. I never had the choice of working for Shinra like you did." He walked past the man, his eyes fixed on a point on the wall._

"_But where do you come from?" The other asked._

"_Where do I come from?" He whispered. He inhaled and turned towards the man with a perfect smile on his face._

"_Are you nervous?" _

_Clarence seemed startled by the change in mood but then his cheeks tinged as the question sunk in._

"_I, Um… I don't know." He looked towards the floor, the blush spreading to his neck._

"_You don't know?" Sephiroth coaxed. He took a step forward._

"_Honestly…I don't know why you are here." Clarence looked up and saw the amused expression on the man's face and became even more flustered. "I mean I do know…shit." He rubbed his sweaty scalp._

"_I'm here because," Sephiroth walked forward, keeping eye contact with the man. His hand digging into his coat. "I saw someone special. Someone I soon decided I need to know. Someone who doesn't know how unique they are." He took the glass from the man's trembling hand, placing the two on the coffee table. Clarence didn't looked away from him, his eyes were wide and mesmerised. Sweat beaded on his brow._

"_I can't believe that." A whispered confession. Full of hope. Sephiroth smirked and brought a fisted hand up towards his face._

"_Clarence," he cooed. Leather knuckles feathering against his jawbone. _

"_Y-yes? Yes." The man breathed._

"_Sleep."_

_The materia lit up the whole room for less than three seconds and when it diminished Sephiroth was left holding the unconscious man lightly in his arms. _

_He pocketed the materia and then laid the form gently on the ground; it wouldn't do to bruise the body, before heading for the backpack._

_It took over an hour but Sephiroth finally had everything in place, there were several pictures of his boy dotted with Clarence's fingerprints in the man's drawers and under his pillow. Evidence of the purchase of the gifts given to the boy were hidden at the bottom of the closet. The laptop was sitting open on the bed with a playing video of the boy. It was a particular attractive recording, in which Cloud was smiling shyly, wearing a red and grey sweater which he was tucking his chin into. Sephiroth was very nearly distracted._

_He now stood above the unconscious form, flexing his hand as he studied the pale, plain features in their slumber._

"_It really is a shame," he whispered, bending down until his knees touched the carpeted floor. Clarence let out a fast exhale before turning his head to the right. His gloved hand was like a snake as it made its way slowly to the mans abdominal area and pressing lightly. Clarence didn't move as he slid the hand further until it was brushing the hem of the obviously new jeans._

"_You should take comfort to know," he muttered as he opened the button and then pulled the zipper, exposing the top of the white boxers beneath. He felt a touch of nausea at the sight of the too-thin hipbone sticking out of the fabric. "That your insignificant life is going to have meaning." The man shifted slightly when his underwear was pulled down and his penis was hit with the cold air. The slightly hard shaft was covered in a thick bush of curly black hair. Sephiroth felt no pleasure at the sight, just a wish that the curls were golden._

_He took Clarence's hand in his. _

"_You're sacrificing yourself for me."_

_He manoeuvred the slack hand until it was wrapped around the man's shaft and began slow movements up and down the length. He looked towards the ceiling and allowed himself to distance himself from the decidedly tasteless act. The penis became harder and the man, though still asleep, began to breath faster. Sephiroth closed his eyes and imagined that the breathing belonged to someone else, that he was doing this to someone else. His movements became faster and harsher as he brought the man closer to oblivious completion, imagining what Cloud would sound like, caught in the throes of pleasure. He let out a moan as his own groin tightened._

"_Nugh," He eyes snapped open when the other let out a yelp. He looked down and every bit of heat dispersed from his body. This wasn't Cloud, this wasn't anything like him. It was just another fleshy mould of decadence. It was disgusting to even have to touch him._

_He scoffed as he brought his seamen coated hand towards his face, his stomach coiling at the smell._

_He grabbed a few of the photographs he had left on the coffee table and wiped his hand in them, mentally apologising to Cloud for the disrespecting act before scattered them on the floor._

_There was only one thing left to do now._

_He fingered the rope with his gloved hands while he stood up and walked to the furthest wall. The curtain rail was thick and secure, and a good distance from the ground. He didn't smile as he threw the rope over the bar and tied a strong knot in it. Leaving the noose hanging from the end._

_Clarence still slept peacefully on the ground, clearly unaware of what was about to happen. He stared down at the plain face for a moment, thinking that he really did feel remorse at what he had to do. Not deeply affected, but more sympathetic…_

"_You shouldn't have come here." He whispered. He took a few more minutes to contemplate the pictures on the brown mantelpiece before sighing heavily and placing his arms under the thin shoulders, lifting the floppy body upright. _

_The man weighed nothing as he carried him to the wall and the General used one hand to hold the body in place and the other to pull the noose over the mans drooping head._

_He had to hold the body about a foot above the ground as he fixed the rope._

_Once done, Sephiroth's strong arms wrapped firmly around Clarence's waist and he sucked in a breath through his teeth. His eyes kept trying to move to the left but he stubbornly suppressed the desire._

_Clarence made a small moaning sound and Sephiroth swore it was his sole desperately seeking mercy. He closed his eyes slowly._

"_Goodbye."_

_The crack that followed was almost satisfying to Sephiroth, it meant the man was truly dead and wouldn't be lingering at the threshold for any length of time. The rope squeaked as its burden swung over and back, mesmerising him as he watched all the life drain from the form, until there was nothing left but meat and memories._

_He left one photo of Cloud on that mantle piece, leaning against a picture of the Fitzgerald family on the left and the man himself, smiling happily in his youth, on the right._

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"Nothing is more important than you."

Cloud pulled his face back, feeling smothered and hot. He pursed his lips and tried to avoid touching his tongue off of them. He couldn't stand the taste.

"I've gone through so much to get you. I don't regret any of it. You're worth it. You're worth everything." Sephiroth leaned in for another kiss, smiling when the blond let his lips fall open. He could taste the reluctance.

The two lay on Cloud's bed, both on their sides facing each other. Sephiroth had his arm draped over the boys waist, keeping him pressed close to his body.

The older man dug his fingers into the boys back, trying to feel even more of the softness and heat. He couldn't get enough of it; holding Cloud like this, smelling him, feeling him. It was so close, so intimate…there was no greater pleasure on the planet. It was euphoria.

Cloud felt sick.

He could smell the other's breath as it blew again and again in his face, making him hot and uncomfortable, as did the arm wrapped around his waist, restraining him, keeping him still and helpless. He was so helpless. There was nothing he could do to stop the other from touching him. He was terrified to try now.

He had already felt the brunt of his anger.

….

_Two weeks earlier. ._

"Good evening love, I'm sorry I'm late this evening."

Cloud didn't look up or acknowledge his captors greeting, he just leaned his hands on his knees and kept his eyes on the carpet. He couldn't speak. If he spoke then he would have to open his mouth and if he opened his mouth then he would start crying. He was too tired to cry.

The night before had opened his mind to a whole new form of depression. He had been unhappy before, sad and terrified, but amazingly his mind had only now grasped the extent of the situation he was in.

He had been kidnapped.

By General Sephiroth.

He had been kept prisoner for almost ten days.

He had been…touched.

He had been stalked.

He would never see his loved ones again.

He was going to die.

How could anyone get past that? How could anything seem good or hopeful when that was their reality? It was too much to take in. It was smothering him, tearing at his insides and pulling at his mind until there was nothing left to do but cry and scream and pray for release. He had screamed. He had screamed and shouted and now his throat was sore, like the first few days he had been in this nightmare. There was nothing he could do. He was going to be hurt and raped and killed.

"Still feeling upset? Hmm?" He barley had the energy to flinch when Sephiroth knelt down and put his hand on his cheek, stroking his thumb along the corner of his mouth. He clenched his stomach until it cramped.

"Are you hungry? We could go upstairs and…" But Cloud reacted quickly to the suggestion, shaking his head and widening his eyes at the previous night's memory.

Sephiroth laughed lightly, as though he had done something amusing. It sounded more shrill than normal though; strained.

"Alright… later then."

Cloud hoped that that meant the other intended to leave but of course that was wishful thinking because Sephiroth moved to sit beside him against the wall, boldly draping an arm around his hunched shoulders.

There was an odd silence for several moments after that, the only noise coming from his kidnapper's finger which slid up and down Clouds arm.

Eventually Sephiroth sighed and turned towards him.

"I thought we had moved past this phase Cloud." He mumbled, tightening his arm a small bit. Cloud felt frustration rise at the words. Move past what? Oh, he was only allowed a few days of unhappiness and then he would get on with all the horrors this place had to offer without complaint? He pressed his lips into a line.

Sephiroth clicked his tongue and pulled his arm back before turning to face him. His face was devoid of emotion, and his eyes looked odd. Wide and a bit glazed. It made him nervous.

He darted away from the man when he leaned in to kiss him. He threw his hands out in front of him and landed on all fours on the carpet, taking deep breaths and closing his eyes.

"Cloud." He felt the man tug at his arms and let out a sound in his throat. He couldn't handle this now. He couldn't bear to feel the other touch him, take advantage of his body. Not now, it would kill him. He tore his hand away and crawled forward, his heart thudding in his chest.

All he heard was a low growl before he was almost knocked out by a vicious tug at his scalp which wrenched him backwards with brutal force. His neck exploded in pain, his heard jolted in his chest and he let out a loud cry. His ears rang with the shock and he began to breathe heavily as he was pulled back further against his captor's chest. He wasn't used to this…violence, and he hadn't expected it. The man was normally calmer about his attempts to stop contact.

He sucked in a breath through his teeth when his chin was grabbed and his head forced back against Sephiroth's heaving shoulder.

"You do not turn away from me," the man hissed, jerking his chin further back which strained his neck. Cloud closed his eyes and tried to calm his breathing, swallowing repeatedly. "How dare you attempt it? You do not deny me anything Cloud. You belong to me. Never forget that."

Cloud didn't want to let the words in but they were too close to the thoughts running through his mind. They weren't lies or fables made up to scare him. Sephiroth had the power to make everything he said come true. He was much more physical than anyone the boy had ever encountered. He could get anything he wanted by sheer force.

"I'm s…sorry." He hissed when his hair was pulled tighter.

"Oh," Sephiroth whispered lowly, "always sorry. But you keep doing the same thing over and over. Disobeying me, talking back, denying me." Sephiroth lips were touching the boy's left cheek by the end of the sentence and he placed an open mouthed kiss on it.

"I…I'm just…afraid. I don't…" His rambling was cut short when his hair was again tugged sharply, his scalp now burning.

"No, you just don't understand." Sephiroth said, "I've been too lenient. I've let you get away with far too much. You need to be punished Cloud." Cloud felt panic flare at the statement.

"What does that…No. I….Please don't do anything to me." He felt tears sting his eyes as his breathing got shallower. Punish him? Gaia only knew what this man would consider a punishment. What could be worse? But that was a stupid question. There could be hundreds more unimaginable, horrible things in store for him. Sephiroth could do anything he wanted to him. There was no limit, no one to stop it. He knew this would happen eventually. He would be tortured like those people on the news; burnt and cut up and killed. Eventually found in a plastic bag in some landfill, or left to rot at the bottom of the ocean, or consumed by monsters. Oh Gaia… It could last weeks. Sephiroth would be slow and merciless. He wasn't human. He was a trained killer.

Sephiroth let go of his hair and pushed him forward again. Cloud was busy getting control of himself and didn't realise the man had stood up until he was half way across the room.

"What are you doing?" He kneeled up, hoping desperately for mercy. "Are you not… are you leaving?"

Sephiroth looked back and gave him a strange smile. Cloud felt the blood drain out of his face at the expression. The skin around his kidnapper's eyes was hollow and black, like he hadn't slept in months. His face was ghastly white and the shadows beneath his cheekbones looked like deep smudges curling into his face. His gleaming hair was obscuring most of his left eye, but its comrade was shining eerily bright at him, the iris more off-colour and glazed than before. The look was… empty and full all at once. Empty of humanity or compassion or anything that separated humans from beasts. Full of something sinister and disturbed that had made its home in the man's mind.

"I'll return momentarily."

He turned and made his way like a wraith to the door.

Clouds eyes widened in terror at the words and he scrambled to his feet.

"N-No. Please Sephiroth. I didn't do anything. Sephiroth. Please." But it was no use, by the time he even reached the stairs the man was gone and the door slammed shut.

"No," he whispered. He began to hyperventilate and brought his hands to his hair, fisting them in it as he looked around the room in a frenzy of fear and panic. He felt unbelievably sick to his stomach. He had nowhere to run. He felt dizzy. What had happened? He hadn't even done anything! He hadn't done _anything._

The blond let out a sob as he spun around. He considered hiding under the bed first, crawling to the very corner and pressing himself against the wall to at least make it difficult for the man to pull him out. But that wouldn't work. His eyes then locked on to the bathroom door and he took a few steps towards it before stopping and wrapping his arms around his waist. Sephiroth would just break down the door, and that would make him even angrier. He didn't need that. Then again, nothing mattered. He hadn't done anything to cause this, Sephiroth _wanted_ to do it. This was the reason he was here. To satisfy the man's sadistic urges. It didn't matter what he did or didn't do.

He couldn't breathe, his chest hurt. He was trapped. Trapped. Trapped. He was going to be tortured now. Oh, Gaia, how was he going to be tortured?

He began to really cry as he walked over to the bed and sat on it, but energy failed him and he soon found himself lying face down as he waited for the fateful creak of door as it allowed agony and fear into the room. It wasn't fair, he hadn't done anything. Why was this happening to him? All of this.

It was the longest few minutes of his life but Cloud realised it was still to short when he heard the familiar noise of his captor returning. He pursed his lips and inhaled until his lungs hurt, trying to control the unfathomable amount of fear he was feeling. His felt sick to his stomach.

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_Sephiroth needed a minute._

_He let himself lean back against the wall, clutching tightly to the box as its contents clattered against the metallic sides before settling in the center again. His head fell back, eyes scanning the elaborately painted ceiling of the house's main hall. He saw nothing there. Just an array of patterns and still forms made to look aesthetically pleasing. He had no mind for that sort of thing. Particularly not at that moment._

_He could feel the blood pulsing in his veins. Burning and throbbing uncontrollably, making his heart pound at a dangerously rapid pace. It was anger; rage, he could feel it in every inch of his body and he didn't know how to get rid of it. He was just so frustrated. So completely, irrevocably angry with Cloud's continual refusals to even acknowledge his concern. His love. Ten days of the same thing now. Of the crying and pleading and then apologizing. It was irritating. He hadn't prepared himself well enough for it, for the sting of this beautiful person's distain. It hurt. _

_And as always with Sephiroth, pain led to anger. Anger to a need to cause harm. _

_He had come to the conclusion that he had been too lax with the boy. If there was one thing Sephiroth could be sure of, it was that fear earned respect. And respect led to admiration. Admiration was a form of love was it not? So that's what he needed to do. He needed to prove to the boy that he was something to fear._

_He sighed, truly unsure if this was not too extreme. It had only been eleven day after all. Cloud was still adjusting._

_Ah, but that was just it; he wasn't adjusting. That was the problem. He wasn't accepting his new life one bit and how would that change if things continued as they were? Cloud would merely continue to deny him and retreat into his own mind and his stubbornness would grow when he saw that there were no consequences for it. It was simple psychology really, Cloud needed to see him as an authority figure who was to be minded, respected and eventually trusted. _

_Yes. He had to do this. It was severe, but necessary. _

_If anyone could attest to the importance of pain and fear in ones life, it was Sephiroth. His own young life had not been pleasant. Far from it. His early years were a continual cycle of pain, loneliness, strain, disappointment and sickness. No one coddled him or comforted him in his doubt. No one had been kind. And that was for the best in the end. He wouldn't be what he was today otherwise. _

_He stood up, taking a tighter hold on the box, jaw set. He wouldn't enjoy this; he would take no pleasure from it. But he loved Cloud and he was willing to do what he had to in order to ensure their relationship developed into that which he had dreamed for so long now._

_He would take no pleasure from it…_

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Sephiroth stared at him ominously, his green eyes shining in the darkness of the room, but Cloud wasn't paying attention to that, his attention was glued to the man's hands, to what he was holding. Though it was a fairly innocuous item within itself, a shiny black box about six inches in width and height with a silver rim and catch, it was enough that the sickness reached his throat and choked him. It was the most important thing in his world at that moment, holding within its solid walls all of his pain and torment.

"Cloud, come here." He gasped softly, pressing himself further into the mattress.

"Please," he whispered.

"Come here," Sephiroth repeated, ignoring his words. He stood in the center of the room, near the bottom of the stairs.

"W-what are you going to do?" His voice was heavy with desperation but he couldn't help it. He was terrified. He winced when the man glowered at him, his eyes narrowing severly.

"Come here. NOW."

The teen's body automatically snapped into a sitting position at the command, his muscles and neurons championing his fear. He bit the inside of his cheek and swallowed the bile rising at the back of his throat.

"Cloud." Sephiroth said softly, holding out his hand. Cloud looked at him pleadingly one more time, not masking the fear on his face, but when he got no reaction he forced himself to stand on unsteady legs. His hands came together in front of him as he stood under the scrutiny of his captor's gaze.

"I'm sorry-" He started but Sephiroth held up his hand.

"Do you know why I'm doing this?" He questioned in the tone a teacher would take; calm but accusing, making sure he knew this situation was Cloud's own fault and he was simply forced to act. The teen searched his mind for the right words.

"I misbehaved." He hated the way the words made him feel like a child but Sephiroth nodded which was in some way a relief.

"Yes. But not only that. You have been disrespectful towards me. You have insulted and scorned me from the moment I brought you here. I let it pass unchecked because I knew that you had to adjust to your new life but you took it too far. I have no choice here. The only way you will learn is with proper discipline." Cloud closed his eyes at the words, his stomach sinking.

"But I'll try to b-" His tried to speak but was cut off when Sephiroth took two steps towards him and placed a hand on his neck. He jumped, his body becoming so still a breeze might have broken it in half.

"Be quite." He hissed, shaking Cloud roughly. He gave him a firm look and then slid his hand down to clutch the boy's thin arm. The blond didn't try to pull away and remained deathly silent as he was pulled towards the bed, even though every speck of colour had washed from his face.

What was going to happen to him? What was going to happen to him? He didn't want to be here. How did he get here? What had happened in his life to lead him to such a situation? He felt sick. He felt sick. He felt sick.

Sephiroth pushed him down once they reached the bed. Cloud scrambled up on the mattress and turned sharply, wrapping his arms around himself and trying to control his breathing as he watched the mad man place the box on the bedside locker beside his half empty bottle of water. He didn't know what was going to happen. He couldn't breath.

He looked on as Sephiroth clicked open the box, letting the lid fall backwards. The man's eyes were set resolutely on the contents inside. Cloud couldn't see what it was. He didn't want to. His heart felt like it was stopping and starting repeatedly and a cold sweat had broken out on his back as watched with frightened eyes.

Then the man turned to face him, leaving the box untouched for now. He dragged his eyes, still glazed and distant, over him slowly; leisurely. Then indicated sharply towards the top of the bed.

"Lie down."

"No!" Cloud shook his head furiously, wrapping his arms tighter around himself. He slid along the wall, trying to get as far away from his captor as possible. Sephiroth exhaled a quick breath.

"Do not make me force you." The words fought their way out through the rage, each holding more venom than a Serpent's viper breath. The teen took them in seriously, fully understanding the threat. However, he was still unable to follow the order. It would be like holding his neck out for the sword and his body simply refused such submission.

"Please," he moaned instead, staring into the man's demonic eyes. "Please Sephiroth."

Sephiroth seemed to stiffen for a minute, the anger falling away from his features leaving them slack and void. It lasted only a moment before he tilted his head and gave the teen a very strange look.

"You deserve this." He assured both of them. "And once it's over perhaps you shall have learned the value of respect."

"I do," Cloud cried, leaning forward. "I understand. Honestly. I just…Please don't hurt me. I thought you didn't want to hurt me? That's what you said." His sentences were poorly formed because his mind was too scrambled to follow any single train of thought.

"I don't _want_ to." Was the hissed response before his arm was caught and he was pulled away from the wall. He tried to twist the limb free but as usual it was a vain effort.

"No. No." The teen screamed, kicking and writhing as he was maneuvered roughly onto his back. The horribly familiar feeling of his kidnapper moving over him and pinning him down sent his mind into hysteria. He kicked and screamed, moving his head from side to side and trying to lift his arms with all of his strenght.

"Stop. Stop. Please. Help. Help me someone. Ple-ease. Help." He shouted at the top of his lungs, arching up from the mattress and looking towards the door, unable to conceive the impossibility of someone coming through it. Of them running down the stairs, getting this evil being away from him and bringing him home. He couldn't acknowledge how hopeless that fantasy was, not when his reality was so terrifying.

Sephiroth didn't react to any of this. Silently, he used his knees and hands to keep his captive still while he sought out the leather straps still attached to the headboard from when they were last used.

Cloud's head spun and by the time his senses cleared he was startled to find that both his hands were now securely fastened to the headboard and that Sephiroth was once again standing straight above him. His chest rose and fell rapidly as he stared up at the man, clenching and unclenching his fingers as he tried to loosen the bindings.

"What are you go-ing to do?" He could barely speak, completely wracked with nervousness and fear. It was like waiting to get a needle or a tooth extraction; that awful moment on the uncomfortable chair when the specialist hovers about the room looking for the right equipment, picking up sharp metallic things that make your stomach flip. Only this was a thousand times worse because the pain wouldn't be over in a second, it would go on and on until he died.

Sephiroth nodded to himself as he looked at his secured prisoner, then he finally turned back towards the box. Cloud lifted his head to get a better view as the man reached in and gently pulled out what looked to be a few glass balls. Materia. He furrowed his brow, caught off guard.

"What's that for?" He breathed out, wringing his hands in the bindings as his kidnapper stood over him with his arm held outwards. The delicate orbs clinked against one another musically as Sephiroth opened his fingers to look at them with mad, inhuman eyes. Cloud swallowed thickly.

"Sephiroth?"

Once again the use of his name brought Sephiroth out of his daze as he snapped his eyes down at him. His perfectly arched lips twitched downwards and he sighed.

"It really is a shame that we have come to this. If you hadn't been so stubborn…"

"Are you se-" Cloud began but shut himself up quickly. Arguing or insulting his captor would only worsen this situation. He had to try to reason with the man, convince him that this wasn't the right thing to do. He took a breath, licking his lips as he started again.

"I'm sorry." His voice was shaky but he tried to control it. "I will try to be better. Please just give me another chance." In the back of his mind he knew his own words were probably a lie. He would never be able to submit to everything this crazed person wanted without question. It wasn't his nature and it wasn't right that it should be asked of him. But at that moment he would use anything he could to escape this situation alive.

Sephiroth wasn't moved though because he shrugged a let out a sardonic chuckle.

"Yes. I hope you will try better in future. I'd hate to have to repeat this." Then he seemed to become angry again because his eyes narrowed and he leaned down closer to the teen's face, his hair sliding over his shoulders at both sides like snakes. "But I will." He hissed, running his thumbnail along Clouds heated cheek and following the digit with his eyes. "I will repeat this as many times as it takes for you to learn the lesson. Remember that."

And with that he straightened back up and as Cloud looked on, anxious and petrified, he selected one materia from the group and within a second the sphere ignited into a ball of orange and yellow light between his index finger and thumb. Fire materia. Cloud began to feel very, very sick.

"I take it you know what I hold here," Sephiroth eyes didn't move from the materia, his voice was airy and drawling. The teen nodded. "But what most don't know is that during the war this magic was one of the most effective forms of…interrogation used on the Wutian Prisoners."

"No," Cloud whispered, shaking his head and pulling frantically at his bindings.

"Yesss,"

"It wi-ll k-kill me. Y-ou cant use it on people."

Sephiroth looked at him, one eyebrow arched as he nodded.

"Yes," he agreed, "it could. But not if used correctly. At low level, carefully controlled."

"StOp" Cloud yelped when Sephiroth reached down to his chest and, without preamble began to open the first button of his shirt with the fingers not clutching the materia. He could feel the heat emanating from the orb, the coolness of the leather gloves. Ice and Fire; Sephiroth.

In a matter of seconds he had the first four buttons of the garment opened and Cloud's sternum exposed. Uncomfortable and weak with fright, the teen tried to turn onto his side. Sephiroth prevented this however, when he moved to lean one knee on the mattress and placed his hand, still holding the materia, on Cloud's chest. The orb pressed in between his ribcage, warm but not intensely ho as he struggled to breath beneath it all.

"Gaia… please Sephiroth. Please don't do this. It will kill me. You can't use them on p-"

"Hush," Sephiroth chided, clicking his tongue. His attention was focused on his captive's chest and his eyes burned at an intensity rivaling the magic-fuelled sphere. It was a familiar look to the teen, one which told of insanity and pleasure. "I promise you it will not harm you permanently. Though it will be a pain you've never experienced."

"Then why…"

"Because I must." Sephiroth said, and there was finality to his tone. Cloud knew then that nothing he said or did could stop this madness. He simple had to endure it.

"Now," the silver haired man said after a long silence in which Cloud had turned his face to the wall and squeezed his eyes closed. "Turn around."

He did.

"Open your eyes."

He did. The eerie visage of his captor greeted him.

"You understand why I'm doing this?" The man whispered. He leant forward, throwing his face into shadows beneath his hair. The orb pressed more persistently against his skin.

"Please don-"

"Do you?"

"…Yes."

"Good boy. Fire."

His world became white a second later and Cloud didn't have time to comprehend what happened. Searing fire seemed to spread through every sinew and pore in his body, scalding his skin and making his blood boil. He arched up from the bed, not realizing that he was screaming at the top of his lungs as he fought to expel this invader from his skin. The pain wouldn't end. The burning only seemed to increase in intensity as he was held in the throes of agony. He kicked his legs, threw his head from side to side and made numerous more demented attempts to escape it. But he couldn't. He was being burned alive.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh."

He screamed, lifting himself up higher from the mattress and throwing his head back so that his forehead was pressed against the headboard. He tried to take in choked gulps of air between the screams but it was becoming more and more difficult every time.

"Ughhhhh, nghh. Stop. Stopstopstopstop."

And it did. A moment later. The teen fell back onto the mattress like a sack of flour, his skin tingling numbly as the fire faded. He stared up at the ceiling, afraid to move even one iota in fear that he'd set off the spell again. Slowly, carefully he tried to regain his breath.

Sephiroth lifted his hand, bringing the fiendish magical weapon with him. Cloud watched him through wide, unblinking eyes and he began to whimper and moan unashamedly when the man quenched the fire materia and instead of putting them all back in the black box, replaced it with a newly glowing orb of bright yellow.

"Oh no, no. Pleas-"

But Sephiroth was merciless, and he didn't even change his expression as he lowered the newly ignited materia to where it's predecessor had sat.

"Thundara."

"No…Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh."

This pain was completely different. More horrible. Electricity shot through his limbs filling them with an indescribable, unfathomable sensation that made his bones rattle against each other. His body writhed on the bed in spastic motions that he had no means of controlling.

"Mmmmmmph."

His lips had unconsciously been pressed together, muffling his throaty moans and gurgling. He began to see dark and brigt patches in front of his eyes and everything besides the pain became hazy and unreal.

He only came fully back when it left him. He once again fell back on the bed, and this time he shook himself and twitched as he fought to rid himself of the lingering tingling. He hadn't noriced that he was crying, but he felt the tears slip steadly from his eyes as he looked up at his torturer.

"Ple ple, ssst…" he gargled. The pain was like nothing he had ever felt. It was incomprehensible. He couldn't breath. His skin was on fire and his bones were shaking. He couldn't breath. And something else. He felt wet. He began to cry harder, openly sobbing.

"Let m-me u-p."

"Not yet," Sephiroth whispered. He looked so calm above him, as if he was completely unaffected by what was happening to the boy. Was that possible, could someone actually feel nothing in the wake of this kind of suffering?

Then to his absolute horror his kidnapper chose another globe and it ignited in numerous different shades of blue. Ice.

"Please…stop." He cried, puling fiercely at his hands. He shook his head when the it was once again placed on his sternum where the skin was beginning to feel sensitive and raw. This materia gave of a cold air, making him wince and jump as it made contact with his damp, burning flesh.

He swallowed the bile and braced himself for the onslaught.

Nothing could have prepared him.

"Ngh."

…..

…..

He lost himself for a minute. Disappeared into the blinding whiteness as his whole body lost feeling. The cold rushed over him in an instant, numbing every last nerve until he could no longer feel his skin. It was a strange sensation.

But he soon came down from the shock, and that was when the pain set in. He'd once heard of freezing water being compared to cold knives sticking into your chest and that comparison didn't even breach this feeling. His body began to suffer darts of nerve pains, up and down his legs, across his stomach and over his face. It grew worse and worse until regained his voice and began to scream again. He kicked his legs and flung himself around but once again it did no good.

"Stop. Oh Ga-ia…s-stop…"

Bile quickly gathered at the back of his throat and he quickly turned his head to cough it out. That was when this new and most awful pain ended.

"Uhhhh, ngh." He coughed and spluttered against the pillow, utterly sick and miserable. His body ached so severely he thought he might collapse but the tingling would allow that. Something metallic-tasting assaulted his mouth and he realized he had bitten into his lip and split it open. The blood was mixing with the other wastes on the crisp white pillow.

"En- ough." He managed to rasp out after a while. "Please. Please..."

"We used to use that, in Wutia." Sephiroth ignored his question. He had the materia held in front of his face and rolled it back and fourth as he spoke. His voice was soft and drawling, dragging out the vowels in a feline manner. Mad. He was mad.

"We'd give them a choice. To pick one to start with. They'd almost always choose ice. Understandably." He shook his head and lowered the globe so he could look down at the boy. "Would you?"

"Nno." Cloud shook his head, sniffing. He was saying no to everything the world had to offer. He couldn't handle the pain.

Sephiroth didn't agree however because despite the boy's weak state, and despite the screaming, shouting and pleading that followed, he once again selected the fire materia.

Twice more he repeated it with each materia. By the end Cloud was half mad, raving and pleading incoherently. He had lost control of all of his bodily functions throughout the ordeal and passed out, miserable and filthy when it finally over.

Hours later Sephiroth held the sobbing boy on the bathroom floor. Cloud's eyes were closed as he hiccupped and sniffed, not being able to stop his chest from jumping. He was traumatized, he realized later, and still finding it difficult to breathe. His body was wracked with cramps and darts of pain whenever he tried to move it and his chest, where the materia had made contact with his skin, was bruised and burnt.

Sephiroth wrapped his arms solid around him, tightening them until he moaned. Cloud didn't resist, he could barley form a coherent thought let alone order his muscles into action. He felt numb. He felt like he was a different person; that this was a completely alternate situation and somewhere in a different dimension he was still just a normal kid going to school and hanging out with his friends. Normal. This wasn't normal.

"Do you understand now Cloud." His captor whispered lowly. He swallowed and shut his eyes." Sephiroth pulled back some damp hair from his face.

"Things are going to change now," the man said, " no longer will you deny me. No longer will you insult me. You will behave as I want you to." He felt the man kiss the top of his head but he couldn't hear what he was saying properly.

"You are mine Cloud. You will obey me. You will act as a you should and respect me." He was confused when Sephiroth clutched him tighter and then began to stand up, pulling his body up with him. He just wanted to stay on the ground, to rest and to sleep.

"Ow," he hissed when his ribes were jolted. He leaned his hip against the porcelain sink.

"Remember the pain Cloud. Remember what the consequences of disobedience are." Sephiroth turned him fully towards the mirror, wrapping one hand around his waist and the other around his shoulders. Cloud kept his eyes down.

"Look at yourself. Look at us." Sephiroth commanded. Cloud hesitated, more out of weariness than defiance but Sephiroth took hold of his chin and forced his face up.

"Ahhh," Cloud shouted. His captor truly was sadistic for touching him when he knew how much his skin burnt. He gritted his teeth and looked towards the tear stained face that was his reflection. He was caught off guard by what he saw. His face looked pale and skinny, his cheekbones prominent and the skin beneath his eyes black. He looked ill and starved. Which he was in many ways. His eyes were blurry so he could barely make out how Sephiroth smiled behind him, his face close to his, a tendril of silver hair sliding over his shoulder. They looked strange to Cloud. They looked like something unrealistic and distant. It was hard to think that that broken thing was him. It was depressing.

He was losing himself.

"We belong together." Sephiroth whispered, kissing his earlobe afterwards. A tear slid down his cheek but its journey was cut off when it was lapped up by a long tongue. Cloud felt goose bumps erupt in his neck at the sensation. He thought he was going to be sick again.

"Will you promise to behave from now on?"

"…Yes."

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Cloud closed his eyes at the memory. He had never felt pain like that. He couldn't even remember vividly how bad it was but he knew that he never wanted to feel it again. He had to obey Sephiroth.

It had been two weeks since that horrible night. Something had changed, the dynamic had been altered. Sephiroth still acted friendly and saccharine towards him, comforting him and making sure he was physically alright. But he had become less tolerant of any resistance towards his actions or orders, snapping and threatening if Cloud got the least bit disorderly. He was no longer allowed to say no or complain about anything he didn't like, nor was he allowed to talk back or physically harm his captor. It was literally hell. Being the single target of a man who placed far too many expectations upon him. He realized that Sephiroth wanted him to be perfect. He wanted him to be innocent, quiet, clean and obedient.

A puppet.

And so, for the most part that was what he became.

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Sephiroth smiled at his boy, rubbing his finger over his temple. Cloud was so good now. That unpleasant little session had been just what they needed.

He brought his hand over to run along the bandages covering the boy's left hand, which was resting loosely below the pillow. Cloud shifted a bit but remained mostly still and silent. He didn't regret punishing the boy all those nights ago. It was just what Cloud needed. He was so good now; quiet and sweet and angelic, like he should be. He let him kiss him and hold him, he ate his food and slept in his bed. He had even started watching television shows that weren't the news. He was accepting his new life, as Sephiroth knew he would.

Feeling blissful happiness overwhelm him again, Sephiroth crushed the boy towards him, taking his lips in a dominating, long kiss that took both of their breaths away. He moaned into his lovers mouth, dragging his hand firmly from the boys neck to his waist, feeling the curve of his perfectly shaped back.

"I love you," he whispered before kissing him again. Cloud closed his eyes, and Sephiroth knew he was trying to keep in tears because he was terrified of punishment. But Sephiroth wouldn't punish him if he cried.

Angels cry sometimes.

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**Okay so I am the worst updater ever. I'm so sorry about the wait guys, seriously. I've had exams until last Saturday and my brother is getting married in Malta this week so I've been getting ready for that. **

**I'm going to have another update by the end of this month and then hopefully I'll be able to continue at a regular pace. Life does tend to get in the way though. Damn life…**

**I'm not sure if this chapter is going to be overly popular because I know some of you were hoping for a sweeter and more understanding Sephiroth but it just wouldn't work that way for me in my head. This is a dark fic and I want to portray the horror of a situation like this as realistically as possible. Hope that doesn't alienate anyone. **

**Anyway, see you before the end of the month. To Malta I go…**


	23. Special Episode of Reno

**So this chapter was suppose to be a part of the next chapter but I kind of got carried away with this sub-plot and decided to post it as a separate chapter. There is no Sephiroth/Cloud here, so that's why I'm posting it along with the next chapter. I don't want to disappoint anyone because after all, this is a Seph/Cloud fan fiction. **

**This was just an idea that was nagging at me and so I decided to write it in order to give my story more scope. Secondary characters are important and I like to develop their individual stories as much as possible. I especially love Reno, he is one of the more interesting and complex characters in the game to me so I wanted to give him a little spotlight. I hope that doesn't annoy anyone too much.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

**This fan fiction contains dark, upsetting psychological and sexual themes so if you are not comfortable with that kind of thing then please don't read because I don't want to upset anyone.**

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"This is insane."

"…Yeah"

"We're gonna die."

"Could be the _best_ case scenario."

The two looked at one another, the same expression of dubiety showing on each of their faces. Zack was the first to turn away; he walked to the edge of the wall and peered out past it.

"I just wish I could go in." He murmured quietly, eyes catching sight of a moderately sized building located a small distance away. Compared to other edifices in the slums, this one was in relatively good shape; its walls were painted a deep and slightly faded green and all of its windows seemed to be intact. There were a few shops around it, selling items such as snack, junk and fast food, cigarettes, newspapers, condoms and so on but it was clear that the reason so many people littered the area that evening was due to the presence of that one building. Bright yellow letters attached to its front wall identified it as 'The Honeybee Inn'.

"We've been through this shit. Yer too identifiable." Reno said lowly, joining Zack at the corner of the building's wall they were concealing themselves behind. Zack looked at him with a glum expression and the redhead just held up his hands in a surrendering gesture.

"S'not my fault yer uncle is the big shit in Shinra. An anyway." He lowered his arms and smirked a bit. "You aint got the drawl like us slum rats. They'd sniff ya out ina second. Now, how do a' look?"

Zack rolled his eyes but then conceded; reasoning yet again that the boy was right on all accounts. He mumbled an 'alright' and then stood back to scrutinize the other's appearance critically.

Reno had dressed for the occasion. The black jeans were the ones he wore on a regular basis, but he sleazed them up by adding a silver chain belt around his waist and adorning his feet with shin-high, silver buckled brown boots-they were Axel's. He was wearing a coat at the moment, both because it was cold and he couldn't walk around Midgar proper with the flimsy green, ripped up tank-top he was wearing underneath. Some chains, bracelets and rings were added to his fingers and arms to enhance the look. His hair was in its usual unkempt ponytail, if a bit more dischevelled, and overall the visage was quiet convincing. He looked like a slum boy out sniffing for tricks.

"You look fine… well. Not fine but…y'know..." Zack scratched at his scalp and pointed a thumb back over his shoulder. Reno walked over to him and patted his arm.

"S'what I'm going for," Reno blew some air out through his teeth and kicked idly at a rock on the ground. Zack crossed his arms in front of his chest and leaned back against the wall.

"Waiting around again," he murmured to himself, eyebrows drawing together. "It's all I've been doing for a month now. Sick of it, y'know?"

"A month?" Reno said with a small frown. "Sounds long when ya say it like that…" He considered something silently for a moment, letting his hand drop and looking towards the ground. A second later he perked up and shook his head as if he were shaking water out of his hair.

"Anyway, we only got one shot at this and ya aint gonna waste it, are ya?" Zack looked at him as though he was going to disparage his words, but then seemed to change his mind.

"No." He conceded, kicking the heel of his black boot against the ground. He was wearing all dark clothes that night, to help him blend in better with the shadows. His own kind.

"Alright." Reno echoed, bringing his hand up to the collar of his coat. "I aint gonna stay long." He explained, pulling the zip downwards, "Just go in, ask some questions and try not ta get noticed."

"It's well guarded." Zack cut in skeptically, stealing a glance out at the building again.

"I'll get ma'self in." Reno smirked, pulling the jacket down his arms. Zack watched as the pale skin was exposed, and his eyes widened.

"Holy!" He exclaimed, "what happened to you?" Reno gave him a confused look for a moment before it clicked in his mind what he was referring to.

"Oh," he said, looking down at the limbs. "Relax man. I did it myself. Y'know they aint gonna buy it if I aint got no marks."

On both of Reno's forearms several small cuts could be seen, mostly around the cubical fossa where they gathered in a group of dots and small gashes that stood out vividly against his white skin. There were more scrapes running down the inside of his forearm and some were visible beneath the bracelets he was wearing. Wherever the cuts gathered large bruises surrounded them; visible even in the dim light due again to the white pallor of Reno's skin. Zack ran his eyes along the marks, his stomach churning.

"Alright there buddy," Reno muttered, knitting his brows together as he looked at him with a slightly amused expression.

"Did it hurt?" Zack asked, grimacing at the thought.

"Nah," Reno shrugged, running his left index finger along his right forearm. "The bruises are fake, I used some makeup, Axel's by the way, and other shit. The rest'r just pinpricks. Now," he stated handing his jacket to Zack. "It's time ta get going."

"Yeah okay." Zack took the coat and then gave Reno's form another once over. "You look… like one of them."

"Shit, thanks." Reno muttered, chuckling sardonically. "Alright. Just in an out. Eh… hopefully won't die. Or end up on ma knees sucking some junkie dick with a gun to the head."

"Just alert me if anything goes wrong. I'll come help. Or get help." Zack said, holding up a small silver crystal to emphasize his point. The small rock was a common communication device bought at most materia stores. They came in a pair and one simply had to touch the surface of one and say 'veni' and it's twin would light up in a reddish-orange glow for several seconds. They could only be used once and turned to black stone afterwards.

"Yeah alright" the redhead said offhandedly. His crystal had been secured to the back of his own belt, hidden behind the shining silver chinks.

"Alright." Zack repeated, puffing his cheeks up and letting the air go out through his partly closed lips. He shrugged at Reno, who straightened his shoulders and mussed the top of his hair with his hand.

"Off I go then…"

"Good luck."

"Yeah…"

Zack nodded and with that Reno left their hiding place and commenced his short walk towards 'The Honeybee Inn'. He was mildly impressed by the way the red-head immediately took on an exaggerated but natural looking swagger. However, his mind was more focused on the feelings of guilt and worry he was experiencing. He shouldn't really allow this; Reno was walking into one of the most dangerous places in the slums on his own. They were just kids; they hadn't a clue of what went on in a place like 'The Honeybee Inn'. It was partly the other boy's plan, but Zack knew that he was the one pushing it. Even now, though he was feeling guilty, he still couldn't bring himself to call Reno back.

It had been a month.

An entire month since his friend had been seen. There was just nothing. No evidence, no suspects, no motives, no anything. He just disappeared one morning without a single trace and no one could find him. Not even one thing to give them a clue as to where he could be found. If there was just one thing then at least his mind would have something to focus on and he wouldn't be feeling so useless all the time. It was getting harder every day to go around the city, searching every building and showing Cloud's picture to people in hopes that a spark of realization would light up their features.

The media had been pretty bad at first; following those involved to the extent that it could be called stalking; crowding around Sky's home, the school, Sera's apartment and anywhere else they though they might stumble upon something juicy. It had made Zack extremely mad, and he had snapped at an idiotic reporter more than once. The reporters weren't the only thing either. He began to realize the extent of human ignorance when he saw people, people who lived in the same building as Cloud or students who went to the same school, talk to the reporters. They didn't even know the boy, several had never even spoken to him but yet they took this chance to get attention for themselves, spewing lies and false emotion at the cameras just so they could be seen as someone important for five seconds. It made him sick, and he had said it to several of them. He called them out, making them blush with embarrassment and perhaps a bit of shame. However, he knew they didn't really care about what they had done. The idea had made him depressed, so he tried to ignore it.

Considering all of this, he found himself surprised when instead of being relieved that the media circus had died down by the third week, it made him feel worse. They were moving on to the next big story, leaving this one behind. Leaving Cloud behind. It would be in the news for several more weeks, but the sensationalism had disappeared because after a month people start to loose hope and there is no suspense left. It was just horrible to think of, and Zack refused to. Cloud wouldn't become a thing of the past, not as long as he was alive. Everyone could give up if they wanted, he wouldn't.

He saw that Reno was approaching the buildings front door now, standing amongst the crowd waiting to get in. He wished he was over there, not solely because he worried for the other boy's safety but also so he could be doing something other than watching and waiting.

But there was nothing he could do about that now. He just had to be ready if things went bad.

Knowing Reno, they probably would.

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Reno felt like his body was incapable of containing the amount of energy in his system. He tried to expel some of it by keeping his limbs active; tapping his foot against the ground, rubbing his hands together, rolling his shoulders and so on, but it didn't much help.

"Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaacck Huuuuuuuuugh"

He looked to the side and his face twisted in disgust at the sight of something that might have once resembled a man but now looked like some sort of sewer creature, coughing and sputtering while vomiting a yellow vicious substance onto the ground. He stared at him for a moment and then brought his eyes over to where a couple was standing against a wall, completely oblivious to the sickly creature as they all but ate each others faces. They were both so decrepit looking, him fat and almost bald and her as thin as a lat with stringy black hair and yellowish skin. He could see their loose flesh jiggle and flab like putty as they roamed their hands all over each other. It made him sick.

Everyone down here was damaged.

He could have spent the night staring at the people around him, marveling at the fact that every time he thought he had seen the lowest level of opprobrium a living person could sink to, he was proved wrong by yet another revolting spectacle. However, the group in front of him soon gained access to the building and as they cleared away he was left standing in front of three very rough looking body guards. Henchmen epitomized.

_Showtime._

His heart was beating a thousand beats per minute, his mind spinning as sweat formed rapidly along his back and neck, but he managed to keep a cool façade and gave the three an awkward smile. He was tall -not overly so but he wasn't small- yet these three beasts made him feel like a little five year old at his first day of school. Two of them were white skinned, and one black. They all had large beefy bodies which were adorned with the same grey pants and tight black T-shirt that had the Honeybee slogan stitched onto the left breast.

"Ya lookin for the playground milksop?" The tallest of them sneered; he looked like he should have been an army commander or something along that vein, with his blond crew-cut hair and a scarred, weathered face. Reno inwardly gulped but didn't change his expression.

"Yeah…" He said, awkwardly putting a small smirk on his face. "I'm lookin ta play." The man raised a brow, taking a step forward.

"This aint prom lily," he said, running his eyes over the teen's form in an obviously demeaning manner, but Reno could also see the glint of seriousness there. The man was looking for something on him, weapons or something else that could hurt their boss in any way. He wasn't just a brainless thug, and that made him extremely dangerous.

"I know." He said, his mouth going a bit dry as he looked into the steely blue eyes. There was something odd about them, like they were glazed over with ice. And wide, very wide. Madness.

"Yeah," the dark man at the door spoke up, his voice hoarse and gravely. "Him's be look'in for cock I say. He have the look of em faggot's" He snorted in disgust, looking at Reno like he was the lowliest thing on the planet. It wasn't a new concept for him.

"It aint cock he's after." The red-head almost jumped out of his skin when his right arm was caught and jerked roughly forward. It was the blond man again; he was holding his arm out straight and studying it.

"A' heard." He started lowly as the mans eyes flicked to his, "that this is the place ta-"

"Where d'you hear that boy?" The man tightened the grip on his wrist, pulling him closer. They assessed each other for a long moment, and then Reno shook his head.

"Just heard is all." He said defensively, raising his eyebrows to convey a look of innocence. The man clicked his jaw, pulling back a bit.

"We don't take kindly ta spys. You don't want to cause trouble with us." He warned, dropping his hand. Reno inhaled and then shook his head.

"I aint look'n for trouble. I just want what I want." He explained, running his hand through his hair in an exaggerated manner as though he were restless; craving.

"It aint cheap either."

"I got Gil," Reno stated quickly, running his eyes over the three. They all laughed a bit.

"Hear that boys? He's got money." The blond looked back at his co-workers and shared a short chuckle, then turned back to him with the amused expression still on his face. "And how does a milksop like you have that kinda money?"

"I got my ways." Reno replied calmly, purposely scratching at his right arm as though it were unconsciously done. The black man let out a loud snort again.

"Them twink's know hows ta be getting 'em Gil. Down on thems knees tak'in it in both ends." He made a lewd gesture with his hand and the man beside him laughed. The blond in front of him cocked an eyebrow.

"That true. You play tricks?" He asked. He was trying to act nonchalant, as though he were having fun with him. But again Reno could see that this man had purpose in his eyes. This wasn't a joke, it was an interrogation.

"I do what I need ta." He said flatly, giving the man a meaningful look. There was a tense moment where he felt that all three of them were looking right through him, before crew-cut straightened his shoulders and let out a huff of air.

"ID?" He asked. Reno mentally congratulated himself for not being cast aside yet, and fished into his back pocked for the card in question. He handed it to the man with a steady hand. The bouncer read the details of the card, his eyes flickering up to him several times and then he sighed and handed it back.

"You understand that we like discretion here Mr Leradine. No tricks or you'll be one sorry piece of shit." Reno nodded, scratching his arm again.

"I won't cause trouble," he repeated. "I just need to…unwind."

"Yous let'in the puff in G?" The dark man asked, his eyes fixed on Reno. He looked surprised, which made the red-head suspicious.

"Yeah." The man replied, giving Reno a dark smile. "Got a soft spot for pretty things." He finished by looking back at his comrades and waving his hand which must have meant open the doors because that's what they did.

"Go on. Drake." He ushered the teen with a wide smile.

For Reno it felt like the longest few steps of his life. He kept expecting one of them to pull him back at the last minute or to feel something like a knife or bullet to pierce his skull. None of that happened though, and when he walked through the heavy doors and the boom of the music and a cloud of smoke hit him, he felt immense relief.

He walked in a bit further and took a few calming breaths of the putrid air, wiping at his forehead and holding his chest. Fuck, that had been stressful.

The smoke caused his eyes to tear and he could barely make out the walls of the corridor as he walked blindly through. He had been in clubs before, a lot of clubs, but they were never this… polluted. He felt like he was breathing in the breath of the soulless and hoped it wasn't infectious.

"Fuck! Shit hole." He hissed under his breath as he almost went foot first into a dark puddle of vomit not yet soaked into the carpeted floor. He sidestepped it and continued down the dimly lit hallway, the music getting louder the further he went.

It was strange, the music was booming through the walls, a strong and quick dance beat that would be playing at any establishment such as this, but there was nothing else. He couldn't hear anyone talking, or dancing or doing what they normally did at clubs. It was as though the music were playing in an empty room. Confusing, considering the reputation this place had.

He finally reached a large door at the end of the hall, it was made of metal which seemed to be badly scratched and dented, as though an explosion had taken place against it. He flexed his fingers a few times and then with a preparing breath, pressed the horizontal bar downwards and pushed the door open.

If the smoke out in the hall was bad, it had to be ten times worse in here. He actually gagged when the smell hit him too fast, and was tempted to recoil back into the hallway. It wasn't anything he'd ever smelled before; it was acidic and heavy and burned his face. Slightly similar to meteor dust, but much more potent perhaps. That, mixed with the scent of alcohol, human sweat and Gaia knew what else made for a disgusting emission.

He cleared his throat and pressed his lips together as he walked into the room, letting the door shut softly behind him. His eyes scanned over the place, making out what they could in the foggy environment. There were people here, if they could be called people.

They weren't talking or dancing, as he assumed they would be. They were all lying on the numerous couches and settees scattered about the room, up against the walls and strung across the centre of the floor. The people lay amongst the cushions; either in the process of injecting themselves, snorting something, smoking something else, or too baked already to do anything but lie back and stare at the ceiling with lidded eyes. It was an unsettling spectacle when repeated over fifty times, like he was in a room full of scattered dolls. And what was he?

"Hey, bubba. Ya looking for a seat. I can shaaaaaaaaare." He almost jumped out of his skin when a cold sweaty palm grabbed onto his elbow. He gritted his teeth together and pulled away, trying his very hardest not to turn around and smash the piece of shit's teeth in. That was the second time someone had grabbed his arm in the last half an hour and he wasn't fucking happy about it. He didn't like people touching him without his explicit fucking permission.

He walked a bit faster now, trying to look as casual as possible and avoiding eye contact at all costs. The music was pounding into his skull, and he thought it unnecessary since everyone here was just lying around, oblivious to the world, let alone a catchy beat.

He walked until he reached the far end of the room then stopped, momentarily stumped. He wasn't going to find anything out here, that was for sure. Even if these people were alert enough to give information, he didn't think they would know anything useful. He turned and leaned against the wall, looking around through lowered lids. He then saw that there was a door at either side of him and knew he would have to go through one. It was just a matter of choosing…

Just then the door to his left opened quickly and he watched as a woman came through carrying a tray of multicolored cocktails. She was a voluptuous number, with a large chest, rounded hips and thick meaty thighs. Her black dress barely reached end of her ass, exposing bare legs which were adorned with shin length black boots and a frilly garter around her right thigh. She had left the laces at the front of the dress open, exposing her cleavage in an obscene way which gave the illusion that her breasts would fall out if she moved too much. He couldn't make out her face in the dim light, only her hair which was tied high on her head in a mess of black curls. He ran his eyes over her with a bit of interest, watching as she walked over to a table near him and set some glasses down on it, giving the patrons a half-hearted smile with rouged lips.

She was a waitress, or something near to it.

"Hey," he called as she made her way back to the door. She didn't hear him so he rushed forward and caught her shoulder lightly.

"No fucking handsies." She shouted suddenly, making him jump back instartlement. She turned to him with a snarl on her face and he held his hand in the air in a surrendering motion.

"What the fuck you want?" She spat in a thick accent, her eyes running over him slowly. The sneer soon fell from her face though and she gave a small smirk.

"Sorry," he drawled, lowering his arms and giving her a wide eyed look. "Didn't mean ta be sneaky there, tuts." She narrower her eyes but it was more in amusement than anger.

"Never be too sure." She countered. "Lots a freaks about."

"No kidden." He gave a low chuckle.

"Ya need something bab." She questioned, shifting the tray in her hands.

"Yeah," he leaned in closer to her. "I was told ta talk ta one of the Bee's. Bout getting some…stuff."

"Stuff?" She repeated, her heavily lined eyes crinkling at the corners. "We got stuff out here,"

_Shit_

"Not that shit," he said quickly, "real stuff." He waited for her to ask what the hell that meant, but to his immense fucking relief she looked him up and down once more and asked.

"You sure bout that baby?"

"You aint got no idea."

"Alriiiiiight…The bee's are through there." She pointed at the door across from them. "Prep'n for something now so customer's aint really allowed in, but I think you'll be let off."

"Alright… thanks." He said, and then made to turn. She caught hold of his arm.

"Don't go ask'n the wrong questions in there boy. Get in, get you're stuff and then get out. Ya don't wanna get noticed. Piece like you." She ran her eyes over him again and then winked and went back the way she came.

He couldn't help but let his eye follow her as she walked away with a trained swagger that made her large hips swing. If he wasn't busy…

He shook his head and looked over at the door.

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Zack tapped his foot repeatedly against the ground as he stared up at the starry sky. His whole body was buzzing with impatience and he felt like he was going to out of his mind.

"Come on Reno." He whispered, clicking his tongue several times in succession. The longer he waited the more he was starting to feel that this had all been a bad, bad idea. He wished he had been able to go in. The suspense was worse than anything else. His heart had literally tried to jump out of his throat as he watched the red-head get interrogated by the security at the front door. He didn't think Reno would pull it off, the teen was a bit of a maniac when it came to people getting in his face and Zack was sure he'd end up in an ill-favored brawl with the three giants. To his surprise, and relief, his friend had actually gotten in. He'd pulled it off.

He had been in there a while now. Zack was dying to know what was happening. Had he found anything? Was Clouds disappearance actually connected to all of this? If it was, was there something there that could help them find the boy? They could find Cloud and everything could go back to the way it was. Well, not exactly because Gaia knew what the boy had been put through, but he would be back and they could work from there.

He pushed himself away from the wall and stretched his arms above his head to release some tension.

Hurry up Reno…

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Reno's eyes widened as he looked around the room. So this was where the living people were?

There had to be over thirty girls in here, all fluttering and skittering around in skimpy white garments that barely passed for socially acceptable clothing. They ran about the room, laughing and chatting as they collected items of clothing, makeup and Gaia knew what else. Some of them sat at the numerous dressing tables lined against the walls, prettifying their faces or having it done by someone else. It reminded him of the time his school had put on a ridiculous school play, and they all had to get into their costumes in the small room behind the stage. He was an Ochu. Wasn't fair; Axel got to be a Chimera.

It took him a while to notice that there were also some boys in here; probably because the term 'boy' was used very loosely on the slim, fluttery creatures that skirted and danced around the room along with the girls.

He scratched the back of his head and stared around himself with a lost expression on his face. To say the spectacle didn't have an effect on him would be a lie, it was straight out of a wet dream.

_Focus Reno._

He shook his head and rubbed his palms together. Where should he start?

"Uh," he took a few steps and tried to get a girl's attention in front of him. She turned to look at him, her attractive heart shaped face flushed as she held some pieces of material in her hand, and a small red bag.

"Yes?" She asked in a breathless voice, blowing a brown curl out of her eyes.

"Uh," he said, "I was told ta come in here ta see if I could get some-"

She interrupted him by waving her hand and then pointing to the end of the room. "Go see Lorraine in the back. I don't have time for this." And with that she fluttered off, like a busy little honeybee.

He pressed his lips into a line and shrugged. Go see Lorraine… Okay.

He walked through the crowd, banging into a people several times and receiving glares. He didn't really have the decency to apologize. Eventually he got through and spotted who he thought was Lorraine sitting in the corner at a lit-up dressing table.

She looked like she belonged in some sort of old painting. Her large form was swathed in several layers of material, all different shades of wine and golden. The only flesh besides her head which was showing was her red tipped hands which stuck out from beneath the fabric as though they were attached to her torso, absent arms. Her plump fingers were adorned with golden bracelets and diamond rings the size of his eye. Her face had been painted white; too white to be natural, and her eyes and lips featured colorful makeup that wouldn't be amiss on a clown. That, tipped off with the plastic looking set of reddish brown curls on her head, made her appear as some sort of Parody of a queen. A regal jester.

She saw him as he approached, her big painted eyes fixing on him and following his stride until he stopped in front of her. She looked away then, and down to the counter where a small bronzed case lay beside a pink bottle of nail polish remover. He watched as she picked it up and clicked it open with the small nub on the side, revealing a set of perfectly aligned cigarettes strapped to the soft inner encasing by a golden band. She plucked one out with her index finger and thumb, and he marveled at the length of her obviously fake nail. They just weren't practical.

"Hey," he started but was quickly cut off when she held up a silencing finger. She pointed at the small stool across from her and by the time he had pulled it over and seated himself, the woman was already puffing away at the lit cigarette.

"We hove uh show tonoight young mon." Her voice was deep and drawling, emphasizing the vowels and dragging the end of each word.

"Yeah, uh, I just need ta ask ya some'tin." He said, leaning forward. She raised an extremely thin brow and took another long puff as she waited. "Yer in charge of the Bee's yeah?"

"I om." She nodded, her jugular fat giggling with the movement.

"An ya see a lot a who comes in an out of here?" Another nod. "Alright… Well I think… one a' ma buddies might a came down here. Couple a' weeks back."

"Oh, uh lot of young people come down here." She said, waving her hand out towards the crowd behind them.

"Yeah, I know." He said quickly, pushing some hair back that was falling into his eyes "Listen, the boy I'm talk'n bout. He's younger than me, has big blue eyes an a shit load a blond hair on his head." He placed his hands on top of his own head for emphasis. "All up in these weird fuck'n spikes."

He stopped talking and watched as she seemed to think over something, her eyes trained on him. There was very little chance the old weirdo would actually tell him the truth, especially if Cloud had been taken here by force, but her face would betray something. He was good at reading people, had to be. His stomach flipped when he saw her open her mouth and nod her head.

"There wos a boy here." She said, lifting her thumb to rub at her chin. "He was one of moy bee's. Smoll ond blond but his eyes wore green I thonk. You sure you're boy had blue." He felt like slapping his hand against his forehead.

"Yeah. M'sure." He said testily.

"Hmmm, this boy wos working for us for over two yeors though." She blew out some smoke and looked at him. Her eyes were empty.

Reno inwardly sighed. Two years. That wasn't Cloud then. Fuck.

"Don't look so down bubba." Lorraine said, noticing his despondent expression. She shrugged her colossal shoulders. "Thot boy went off with someone a few months ago ond never came bock. Huh." She gave the most insincere look of regret he had ever seen in his life and then flicked the ashes onto a tray on the table, where they floated down to join the already sizable pile of their siblings.

"Yeah?" He said with only half interest, bored of her now that she was no longer useful. "You're sure there aint no one else?" He questioned, staring at her intently.

"No, ond I would know." Just then the chorus of humming and chattering behind him decreased in volume and soon disappeared altogether. He spun around to see that everyone was looking at the far side of the room, opposite him and Lorraine. He looked over to see a small group of men emerging from a formerly sealed door. The group seemed to consist mostly of bodyguards, two goons that looked similar to the ones he had met at the door, and two others dressed in more formal looking grey suits. The four were standing silently at each side of two men, their employers presumably, who were busy shaking hands and greeting one another.

If there were ever a definition of what opposition meant, it wouldn't do as good a job as the picture these two men presented. One of them was a short blond man with an unhealthy milky pallor to his skin that touched on deathly. He had a rounded form, with a potbelly, chubby small legs and too many chins to count. He was dressed in a tacky red leather coat with leopard print fur around the collar and sleeves. That was bad enough, but Reno really felt like rolling his eyes at the amount of jewelry hung around the implied neck and hands. He guessed that this must have been Don Corneo, from what he had heard of his description.

In complete contrast, the other man was tall, slim and dark skinned. He was extremely attractive with chiseled Wutian features and long dark hair that looked that took in the light of the golden lamps scattered about the room. As he stood there in a long well cut coat which ran to his knees, his body language and manner of holding himself spoke of high class and wealth more than a truckload of jewelry over could.

Reno felt his eyes linger on the man, drawn in by something more than his looks. It was his air. Cool confidence tinged with a casual kind of alertness, nothing like he'd expect down here. If Lorraine was a parody of regality, then this man could have been the real thing.

He finally took his eyes away from the two-or one- when he felt the large woman beside him pull herself noisily to her feet, taking a few breaths once it was achieved, and then waddle across the room to the two men.

As they talked amongst themselves Reno moved his attention towards the door they had come out of. These two men had being doing some kind of business back there, so he guessed _that_ was where he needed to be.

Across the room Lorraine let out a loud laugh, which was echoed by Corneo but not the other man. Then she waved her arm outwards and the three of them began walking towards another door to the left, the bodyguards going with them.

He picked at the cuticle of his index finger as he waited for them to leave entirely, and then for the rest of the group to resume their fast paced dressing routine.

The red-head stood up slowly, keeping his eyes alert for anyone who might be watching him, and then started towards the door.

He actually managed to get over and in without a problem, which made him wonder at the security of the place. Seriously, this shit had been too easy. The small room he was in now had but one door which he walked over to. Again it wasn't locked. He turned the handle and pushed it open, expecting someone to jump out at him any minute.

Nothing happened, and he found himself in an averagely sized room that, judging from the desk and numerous file cabinets, was an office.

"Shit." He murmured to himself with a light chuckle. He had actually gotten in here without having to sneak or avoid anyone. Maybe this place wasn't as dangerous as he'd been led to believe. It was all just a group of slum-rats and wasters with some money in their hands. Too up their own asses to suspect that anyone could actually be trying to pull one on them. Fucking shit-eaters.

He went over to the desks, which was a slightly scratched but still handsome looking piece of furniture made of dark oak wood with golden trimmings around the edge. It didn't look right in this room, with the crumbling green walls, filthy carpet and metallic file cabinets surrounding it.

There was nothing on the desk to help him, just numerous sheets of papers containing billing for orders of Gaia knew what and an ashtray overflowing with burnt tobacco and crumpled buds. He checked the inside drawers, his hands shaky from the rush, but again all he found was more paper and forms dealing with the Don's elicit business. If he was a cop he was sure there would be enough on this desk alone to put the man away for a while, but that wasn't his prerogative.

The place had been left unattended for too long so he didn't waste any time in running over to the file cabinets and looking through the drawers quickly, his heart going crazy in his chest.

"C'mon, c'mon, c'mon." He whispered, looking over at the door as his fingers flicked through the files. More forms and orders, nothing useful. He moved from cabinet to cabinet, every second making him more anxious.

On the third cabinet, second drawer, he finally found something of note. It was a heavy blue folder with no label and as he pulled it out a small piece of paper slipped through and onto the ground. He put the folder under his arm and bent down to pick it up.

It was a photograph, depicting an attractive young woman possibly only sixteen. She was looking at the camera with dull brown eyes, her face pale and dark hair loose around her head. He turned the photo around and saw that there was a number written on it, and nothing else.

The folder contained several more pictures, all of girls and all looking at the camera with different expressions of fear, sadness and numbness. He shifted through them, momentarily forgetting about his rush.

That was one bad fucking move.

"Well well."

The voice hit Reno like a giant needle to the centre of his spine. He snapped up straight and looked towards the door with wide, stunned eyes. The only thing that ran through his mind as he stared at the familiar form of the blond bouncer standing within the frame of the door was…

_Fuck._

He'd been unforgivably stupid. He'd taken too long in here. He should have just had a look and then left. Now there was a good chance that he would be dead within the hour. Fuck that, within the minute.

"Aint no drugs in here sop." The man said in his low, gravely voice. Reno was able to get a better look at his face now, the scars dotting his cheeks, the line across his chin, the veined eyes. Damaged like the others, but his hurts ran deeper.

"Heh," he inwardly cringed at the pitch of his voice, reminding himself to at least act like his balls had dropped. "I was just-"

"I know what you were doin, rat." The man cut him off, walking fully into the room which seemed to become very, very small. "Knew from the minute I saw ya. You aint no pissin' junkie."

Reno thought this over. Was the man just saying that now that he had been caught? Or had that been the reason he'd been aloud in in the first place; to prove something already guessed. It had been easy to get in here, too fucking easy. But the latter idea was a bit of a blow to his self-made ego.

"Question is. What the fuck is a rat like you look'n for here?" The man moved forward and Reno took a step back, keeping his eyes on his assailant's face in case he tried anything too quick. "Who ya working for? Hah?"

"Wha?" Reno questioned, slowly, slowly bringing his hand around his back. Slowly so as not to alert this fucker to anything. "I aint working for anyone." His fingers found the device, attached to his underwear underneath the rum of his pants.

"No?"

"No. _Veni_" He pressed the button.

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Zack's eyes shot open the moment he felt the tingling vibration. He sat up straight and hastily pulled the small crystal out of his pocket. It was glowing the promised colors between his fingers, only giving off a small, tickling warmth.

So Reno was in trouble. His eyes darted back and forth as he tried to think. The crystal system was a good idea; fast and easy. Only, they hadn't exactly worked through what would happen after Zack got the signal. Should he call for help and wait? But that meant Reno would be left to fend for himself for Gaia knows how long.

He scratched at his head and looked at the two bouncers standing outside the building's door. He could probably take them, maybe, but that would cause a ruckus and then there'd surely be about twenty more of the same on him. He didn't think he could fight twenty men, he was no SOLDIER. And they most likely had weapons. He had a knife and some materia.

"Ah, okay…" He pulled his hair straight up from his head and took a few steps forward, and then back. He had to think of something. Reno could be in real trouble in there. He didn't need to lose another friend.

His hand reached down and he fingered the cell phone in his pocket for a moment, his stomach tightening into a knot. Oh Gaia, he had no choice.

He pulled the device out, dialed the number, brought it to his ear and listened to it ringing. His eyes peered out at the building again, as if its exterior visage might offer him an insight to what was happening within its body.

"_Zack?"_

"Hey Angeal…"

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"Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck."

Reno's head flew to the side, blood projecting from his gashed lip and onto the wall beside him. He took in a few deep gulps of air, not bothering to turn his head back. His hands twisted in the cuffs, vainly trying to loosen something.

"C'mon red. Tell us some'tin ya know." He looked back at the man, who had identified himself as Gau while he had wrestled him into a chair and tied his hands behind his back. The bastard was stronger than he'd expected. Madness trumped muscle.

"Uh," Reno grunted, spitting some blood onto the floor beside him. "Alright…. Shit…I know-"

"Yeah." Gau leaned in close to him, his bitter breath reaching his nostrils. Reno turned his head and sneered at him.

"That yer a son of a bitch Malboro fucker."

Slap.

"Hm, mh," Reno pressed his lips tightly together so he wouldn't scream, even though his face was stinging like holy hell. He gritted his teeth when he felt a hand going around his neck, pressing tightly.

"Ack, ck hn." He gagged, the fingers pressing into his esophagus, taking his air away. The man turned his head to face him, a cruel glint of sadism shinning his eyes.

"Ya got a pretty face boy. Maybe we should decorate it? That make ya talk? Hah?" With that he let go, almost pushing him backwards as he did. Reno took in several loud lungful of air and watched through his lashes as the bastard exited the room.

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Zack drummed his fingers against the wall, looking around himself impatiently. Nothing. This was taking too long. Reno could be dead by the time his uncle came. He couldn't let that happen now. He couldn't just wait around while another friend disappeared.

He bit his bottom lip and walked over to the edge of the wall, looking at the building in thought. They wouldn't recognize him straight away, would they? They wouldn't know he was Angeal's nephew. If he went in and found Reno he might be able to help him, or at least postpone whatever was going to happen until help arrived. He had to do something. He couldn't just wait here while Reno got hurt or Gaia knows what else.

"I'm going." He whispered to himself, nodding to affirm it.

And so he went. The walk to the inn wasn't long, nor was it pretty. Everywhere he looked there were malnourished, filthy people smoking or lying on the ground or engaging in other antisocial behavior. He ignored them and rushed to the entrance of the inn, gearing himself up for what was going to happen.

A couple in front of him got turned away, mumbling obscenities as they went. Zack rubbed his hands together and looked at the two bouncers, one pale and one dark as soot.

"Hey," he said. They remained silent so he raised a brow. "Uh…"

"No one else is allowed in tonight." The pale one said, and his tone implied that there was no room for argument. He cleared his throat and scuffed his shoe against the ground.

"Oh. Uh you see I-"

"Ya 'ear 'im bitch?" The black man cut him off with a growl, taking a giant step forward. Zack stepped back and looked up at his face. "It closed. Go fin' somewhere else ta stick i' dickwad."

Zack tilted his head, considering what had been, rather rudely, conveyed to him.

"Alright." He said after a few minutes, holding his hands out and giving them a wide eyed look. "Didn't mean any harm fellas. But…"

"No bu's bitch. Get yo ass outta ma fuck'n sight fore I brain ya."

"Okay, okay," Zack snapped his head down to the ground for a minute. He looked up and tried to put on his best, innocent expression. "It's just that group over there-"

Both of their eyes followed where he was pointing, and without a moments hesitation he lunged forward and darted between them.

Their combined shouts of surprise followed a second later but he was already at the door by then. He hastily pulled it open and managed to slip in, barley getting his arm in before it was grabbed.

His body was shaking as he slammed the door harshly behind him and then sped away from it quickly. He couldn't see a thing with the darkness and thick smoke but he still hurried down what he thought was a hall. It was only a few seconds before he heard the door behind him being pulled open and loud footsteps banging against the carpeted floor.

He picked up speed and raced through the corridor, biting his tongue from the pressure. He was immensely relieved when he saw a large metallic door and all but slammed into it as he pushed the bar down and let himself in.

"Ack, uh." He chocked as he inhaled a good lungful of the most revolting smoke he had ever tasted. He squeezed his eyes shut and hurried aimlessly through the dark space, not having a clue where he was going. It took him a few seconds to recall his senses and when he did he berated himself for not being quicker, especially when the door behind him opened again.

"You're dead." One of them roared behind him so he took off running again, blearily noticing that there were several people in the room and not one of them had looked up with interest but just laid around, half dead on the couches and tables.

He hurried forward, darting between tables and chairs and eventually he could make out the far wall. He couldn't see a door though.

"Crap!" He whispered, but then he looked to his left and saw a door there. He was just thanking Gaia for that when an intense pain in his back knocked the wind out of him. He gasped and lunged away from where one of the men was attempting to catch his hair.

"Piece a shi'" the goon roared, throwing himself forward and clamping a hand down on Zack's shoulder. The other was coming around to help him and when he was in front of Zack, the teen jumped up and kicked his legs into his chest, sending him stumbling backwards. A few people around them had gotten up now, and were looking at the scene with confused eyes.

The man behind him attempted to get his hand around his neck but Zack ducked and then threw his elbow back, feeling the pain as it collided with fairly hard muscle.

The man grunted and released his hold for just one second which allowed Zack to get free and make a charge for the door. He managed to get to it and without thinking or even looking properly, he opened it and went through, slamming it behind him again.

Of course, he probably should have looked where he was going. If he had then he might not have found himself where he was at that moment, standing against the door of a brightly lit room, staring like an idiot at the numerous faces who stared back at him with varying degrees of interest, confusion and anger.

"Uh… um." He tried to say but then shut his mouth when the door behind him pushed open and threw him forward. He stumbled a bit as his pursuers passed clumsily into the room.

He looked at them, then at the four other men walking towards him with blank expressions on their faces. More bodyguards.

"What's going on here?" A loud, nasal voice broke through all the other sounds and Zack snapped his head over to see a small and extremely ugly fat man stand up from his chair, where he had been sitting watching the scantily clad people do Holy knew what on the stage in front of him. The dancers were all still now, looking at the scene as they huddled together like spooked chocobos.

"This _boy _got in." One of his bouncers answered, taking a few steps towards Zack, who was trying to calculate a way out of this mess. This was pretty bad, and he couldn't see Reno anywhere. That wasn't good.

"You let a whelp get past you. Oh ho, what imbeciles do I have working for me?" There was a comedic air about the man, the way he moved and the sound of his high nasal voice in exaggerated despair. He turned to another man still sitting down beside him, the only other in the room that didn't look like a bodyguard. "Good muscle is hard to find. Ho…" Then he turned back to the bouncers and waved his fat little arm.

"Get him out a here." He answered. Zack braced himself for a fight as with leering smirks the men began to close in on him. He had aimed to kick the closest one somewhere that hurt and try to create a gap for himself, when they were all caught off guard by a new voice.

"Wait." It was the man beside the fat man. Zack watched as he stood from his chair, revealing his tall slim build and giving him a better look at his face, which was composed of the best features the Wutian heritage had to offer; oval eyes with dark lashes and eyebrows, a chiseled slim jawbone, small nose and thin lips, topped off with soot black hair that fell in dead straight rivulets behind his back. He shouldn't have seemed imposing, considering the size of the men around him, but Zack knew for some reason that he was the one you wouldn't want to cross. There was something in his air…

"Is something wrong, Tius?" The fat one asked, looking up at his companion in confusion.

"Yes." The man said, stepping away from his seat and walking towards the group. His movements were very straight, almost to the point of being mechanic. His bright brown eyes locked on Zack. "I know this boy."

Zack inwardly winced but kept his face blank.

"You do, oh ho. Who is it?" The blond man crooned, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Zackary Fair." Zack pressed his lips together in a line as the man kept eye contact. "The nephew of Angeal Hewely."

The whole room broke out in a chorus of surprised grunts and whispers. The fat man's face lost all of its humor and he looked at the Wutian with a frown.

"Are ya sure, ho?" He questioned, walking over to them. Tius nodded, crossing his arms over his chest. "Fuck fuck fuckady." He stomped his pudgy legs against the ground and threw his fists in the air. "Oh ho, I hate those military apes."

"So wha?" The black man, who was now standing right beside Zack, said loudly, slamming his fist down on his shoulder. "I' was 'im tha' tried ta break in ere'. We aint afraid of no SOLDIER scum." Zack rolled his shoulder as the large fingers dug into his bones.

"Oh, why did ya break in here boy. You a spy?" That was the blond man again; he was peering at Zack through narrowed eyes.

"No," he said defensively, jerking his shoulder to try to get it free. "My friend… came in earlier and I was just looking for him." Honesty was the best policy here, mostly. "He was just trying to get some stuff but he hasn't come out."

"Friend. Ho… no friends in here." The man cooed, holding his arms out.

"He is. He has long red, red hair." Zack spoke slowly, looking from face to face inquisitively. "Lanky…" He stopped talking when he saw the sly smiles the bouncers from outside passed to one another. He looked at them both, raising a brow.

"Where is he?" He asked, giving them a mildly threatening look. They both looked at the fat man, who was clearly their boss.

"This 'friend' was caught poking around in our business Don. G's questioning him now." Zack took the words in, his stomach clenching with tension. So that man was Don Corneo, well that wasn't good. And they were questioning Reno? Gaia only knew what their method of extracting information was.

"Ho, really." The man, Don Corneo, crooned, clasping his hands together in front of him. "So we have little spies here hah? Ho, well that's not going to work. No, no."

"Perhaps," the Wutian man cut in, uncrossing his arms and putting them at his side, "we should go see this other boy. This isn't the place for this." He motioned towards the group still standing on the stage, looking nervous and afraid.

"Oh ho!" Corneo exclaimed, shaking his head. "The goon's will take care of this. You can stay and enjoy the lovelys." He chuckled, sounding completely deranged, and pointed at the stage.

"No," the other man shook his head. "I would sooner watch how you're business deals with this sort of thing."

The small man's whole demeanor changed at this. He stopped moving and narrowed his eyes until they were but slits as he regarded the other,

"Alright then." He said, and then nodded at the goons who closed in on Zack and caught his arms. "Off we go."

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The first thing Zack saw when they opened the door to the room was blood. It drew his eyes in instantly; there may as well have been nothing else there. He let out a shout and threw himself forward, only to be held back by several pairs of large hands.

He stared in horror as the huge man stood away from his friend, the bloody instrument held in his hand like some sort of trophy. Reno's head was being held back painfully by a strange looking woman, and that the red-head was panting heavily in his seat.

Blood was literally covering most of his face, streaming down from his eyes. In a moment of intense sickness and panic Zack had actually thought they had done something to the red-heads eyes, but was mildly relieved when the woman let the boy go and he was able to see that both orbs were still there. _Thank Gaia_.

Reno panted, letting his head fall against his chest, large amounts of blood spilled down past his chin to stain his shirt.

"What the fuck d'you do?" He shouted, struggling in the many grips. He looked at the man holding the knife, who gazed back at him with a sick, cruel smile.

"You know this sop," he asked, jerking his head in Reno's direction. Zack nodded.

"He didn't do anything." He argued, shaking his head.

"He wos poking oround." That was the woman, a strange, grotesque thing with a body the shape of a boulder swathed in different fabrics. He looked at her pudgy hands, noticing the blood there.

"Knew from the second I saw him." The torturer said again, and then he turned and looked at someone behind Zack. "Told Lorraine ta tell me if he was up to anything suspicious. Asking about a boy he was, and poking around your office."

Fuck, Zack inwardly exclaimed. He looked at his friend, who seemed to be breathing better now, although his head was still hanging down on his chest. His hair was covering a good portion of his face, but what skin Zack could see was covered in blood.

"Oh ho, two little Shinra spies." Corneo croaked, clapping his hands together. "They send boys. Ho ho!"

"Shinra?" The man said, "didn't know that. Haven't been able to get a word outta this one. Gave him some nice marks though. Think they'll suit him."

"Heh heh," the man beside Zack chuckled, leaning down closer to him. "G's a real artis'. Cuts em up good.'"

"Ffff," Some mumbled sounds came from Reno's direction as he tried to lift his head. "Fuck'n…peon'sss."

Zack watched tensely as the blond man walked back over to the red-head and grabbed his hair, pulling his head upwards.

"Think he needs a few more..." He whispered, staring down at the teen with a strange kind of eagerness that made Zack worry for his friend's flesh.

"Why… doncha try ta make em hurt…this time." Zack wanted to tell Reno to shut up and keep from provoking them further, but he didn't get the chance when a deep voice spoke up behind them.

"May I ask," it was the Wutian man again, "If you are here. Who is manning the door?"

"Oh ho, yes." Corneo agreed, and Zack saw him wag his arms about as though he were a orchestral conductor. "You and you, back to them doors. We can take care of this here, oh yes."

The men didn't seem too happy about this, especially the black man holding Zack's shoulder. He let out a loud grumble and Zack was expecting him to stomp his foot on the floor and shout 'it's not fair', but he didn't. He and the other man walked out with a few heavy breaths, leaving Zack to be held by another two goons.

"So," the Wutian started, crossing the room with almost soundless footsteps and stopping a few feet away from where Reno was sitting. "I think it's best if you leave mam. This is no place for a woman such as yourself." This was directed at the obese woman, who stood close to Reno's chair, her large left hip jutting as she leaned to the side a bit.

"Oh honey, I'm tougher thon you think. Hm," Zack watched as the man looked at her with an emotionless face, certainly not interested in her attempts at flirting. How could he be?

"Please," his tone was low and firm and she seemed to understand that because she sighed dramatically.

"Alrighty, I'll leave you boys to play thon." She gave him a wink and then waddled on. As she passed Zack she smiled at him, a sadistic smile that made her face wrinkle and her eyes narrow into black slits. He felt like he was glimpsing her true persona behind the comic mask, and it was as dark and cruel as a Behemoth's core. Who was she?

"Can we get this over with, got some girls to show ya, ho ho." Don Corneo walked over to the large oak desk in the centre of the room. The man who had been torturing Reno nodded.

"Cant get anything outta him. Only started though, I'll have 'im blabbering soon." He smiled down at Reno, who grunted and sneered at him, the blood dripping over his lips.

"Ya couldn't get… water outta a tap." The red-head spat, blood splattering with the saliva. Zack jumped when his friend received a very harsh back-hand across his face for his comment.

The Wutian cleared his throat.

"Well," he said, walking over to stand beside Reno's assaulter. Zack watched them tensely, preparing himself for the worst. "Which of you intends to fill us in on what two _boys," _he dragged out the word, looking at them both in turn, "are doing sneaking around a place such as this."

The two teens looked at each other, and then at the man, remaining silent. He raised a thin brow.

"Gau will have them talking. Hah," Corneo piped in, shaking his shoulders excitedly.

"No," Tius said briskly, waving his hand as if to swat away an insect. Which, in Zack's opinion, Corneo was. But what about this man? He was the dangerous one. Cold and calculating and not a bit phased by the whole situation.

"We weren't spying." Zack said quickly, trying to get the man to look at him. It worked and soon he was at the center of attention once again. Reno shot him a look, as if to say 'what the fuck are you doing'.

"No, then why was lily here asking Lorraine about our business." The tall man, Gau, asked with a threatening tone to his voice. Reno sighed and shook his head, the blood was still wet on his skin but had dried enough for the two gashes beneath his eyes were visible. They looked brutal and deep. Scarring.

"He wasn't," he said before his friend could say something to earn more punishment. "We were just, uh… our friend went missing and we thought-"

"We don't give a shit bout yer friend." Gau hissed, holding the knife in front of him. Zack felt a flash of intense anger go through his entire body, heating his blood and making his thoughts turn to ash.

"Well I do," he hissed, leveling the man with a stare. "I give a shit. And I want to find him."

"What was his name," the Wutian asked, his eyes moving back and forth as though he were thinking about something .

"Cloud." He was surprised to feel his throat tightening and had to stop for a second to clear it. "Cloud Strife."

"Cloud Strife. Uh…no no. No boys here called Cloud!" Corneo said, smacking his chapped lips together and shaking his head. Zack looked at him, trying to read whether he was lying or not. He honestly couldn't tell though, the guy was a loon with a capital L and they were the hardest to read.

"He has blond hair. Big shock of it on his head. Blue eyes." But the man just continued to shake his head and he sighed in defeat. "Whatever then."

"Don't fancy boys me. Only girls. Hmmm."

"Still not the point," Gau said, pointing the small knife at Zack's face. "These shits were snooping around, that ai-"

Zack barely had time to register what had happened. In the blink of an eye the huge man went from standing and roaring his words, to letting out a long drawn gasp and slowly collapsing to the ground like a pile of bricks.

He jumped back to avoid the man hitting his legs and then brought his bewildered eyes up to where the dark man, this Tius, was standing with a glowing ball of orange materia in his hand.

"Wha-" Coreno's cry of confusion was cut off when a loud ruckus erupted behind the dark-haired teen. He was released and took a few steps forward until he was standing at the side of the desk. As he turned he saw both of Corneo's bodyguards get taken down by the two that belonged to Tius. Their falls shook the room, actually causing a bit of dust to loosen from the ceiling, and Zack watched the two men move to the door, halting Corneo in his attempts to skitter away.

"Oh, what is this?" The small man cried in anger and fear, looking at Tius in utter disbelief. There was actually water in his eyes.

"Nothing personal." The man said coolly, tucking the instrument somewhere inside his jacket.

Zack's mind was spinning. He hadn't a clue what had just happened, but he wasn't complaining.

"Knew…it."

Oh, Reno. He turned and looked at the red-head, who was looking up at the Wutian with an-amazingly enough- smug smile on his bloodied face.

"Reno," Zack said, walking over to him and kneeling down. He looked up at Tuis, questioning him with his eyes.

"I assume the keys are somewhere on this man's person." Was all he was given, and he did as advised. Crawling over to the comatose Gau and checking his pockets for the keys. He found them in the right one, along with a few Gil notes, a faded packet of chewing gum and a small piece of paper that he didn't read.

He quickly unlocked the cuffs holding Reno's hands behind his back and then helped him get to his feet.

"Gaia Reno," he said as he studied his face. The gashes under his eyes were two long lines that followed the curve of his cheekbone. It was hard to make out their shape with all the blood but they looked big.

"Son of a bitch," the red-head spat, bringing his hands to his face. "Cut my fuck'n face. Piece of shit." Zack moved aside as Reno let out a strong kick that caught the thug directly in center of his stomach. His nostrils were flaring and he wiped his arm across his nose, smearing the blood.

"Where's the bitch. Gonna fuck that pig up." He grumbled, clenching his fists at his side.

"Calm down." Zack warned, motioning towards Tuis who was looking at Don Corneo with a stony expression.

"You'e a betrayer." Corneo shouted, sounding like a little child instead of a crime lord. "We done business together. Ho. Good business."

"Sleep him as well," and with that one of Tius's men raised the materia and the cowering man was out like a baby.

"I'm confused." Zack said flatly, scratching the back of his head. He looked at the Wutian, who smirked a bit.

"You've gotten yourselves into a bit of trouble." He remarked, fixing the end of his coat so it wasn't folded back.

"Uh… are you good. Or just gonna kill us in a different way." He asked with a nervous chuckle. The man looked at him, his face devoid of humor but not unkind.

"I work for Shinra. With you're uncle. I can assume he doesn't know you're here."

"He does actually. On his way." Zack replied, giving Reno a sheepish look when he stared at him curiously. "I didn't know what else to do?" He said defensively.

"May as well be dead then," the redhead hummed, touching one of his ruined cheeks with his fingers. "Fuck. Shit stings like hell."

"I have no potions with me unfortunately." The Wutian cut in, running his eyes over Reno's wounds. "I hadn't expected my mission to be interrupted in this manner." He did sound a bit moody.

"Knew there was some'tin bout you." The red-head said. "Ya aint in this buiz. Could tell the minute ah saw ya." He clicked his tongue when he was done. The dark man smiled a small bit and lowered his eyes to the ground.

"Could you…"

"Zack."

All three looked over to the door where Angeal stood; his eyes alight with an anger rarely shown. Zack lowered his head guiltily and stared at him.

"I want to thank you Tseng." The raven haired SOLDIER said, eyes still on his nephew. "And to apologize for this disruption."

"Yes well," Tius, no Tseng, folded his arms. "These things cannot always run as predicted."

"Indeed." Angeal said, and Zack thought he might have been talking about much more than a mission.

"Well, I'll take my leave. I must see to our felons. The young man is in need of medical aid, I shall have that arranged." With that, Tseng left the room.

"He's hurt." Zack mumbled, holding up a flagging Reno. Angeal walked over silently and caught the red-head by his chin, examining his wounds.

"Hm," his face creased, deep lines forming around his eyes and mouth. He stepped to the side and caught hold of the boys arm, slinging it around his shoulders which were so high and broad that Reno was practically lifted from the ground. Zack's support was rendered obsolete.

"Fuck." Reno mumbled tiredly.

"Come on. We'll bring him outside." Angeal said and so they did. Zack took off his jacket and allowed Reno to press it to his face to slow the bleeding. The cuts were deep.

The rooms had all been emptied out by then and so as they walked their footsteps echoed loudly throughout the spaces. There was a tense atmosphere surrounding Zack which was both thicker and more stifling than the malodorous smoke this club seemed to specialize in.

When they got outside there was a scene of controlled chaos happening as Corneo, the fat woman and the unconscious goons were loaded into small black hover vans and driven away from the club. A small crowd had gathered to watch the spectacle, and they scattered like flyaway sparks when another vehicle drove into the scene. It was a black Gelnika model. It pulled up just outside the door, near to where Zack and Reno were standing. Angeal had gone over to converse with some official looking men.

"This vehicle will take your friend to the nearest hospital."

Tseng slid up behind them, without one hint of a sound. He sidestepped the two and went to open the car's door, revealing the neat leather interior.

Zack moved forward to help Reno get in and once the boy was sprawled ungracefully across the backseat he made to get in himself.

"No Zachary." Tseng placed a palm on his shoulder to halt his movement.

"…but."

"Your uncle insisted."

Zack glanced briefly over at Angeal, who was still occupied with the other officials, and sighed.

"Alright." He conceded, holding up his arms and shaking his head. Then he turned and leaned into the car.

"I'll see you later Reno. At the hospital or at home. Whichever." Reno was slipping into unconsciousness, so he didn't respond. Zack bit his lip for a moment.

"…Thanks Reno. You're a real friend. And I'm sorry."

And so he stood back and allowed the door to be closed and the car to pull away from the scene.

Tseng left shortly after, he didn't know where he went. Zack sat down on the pavement waiting for Angeal to finish up. As he sat there, amidst the worst filth of the slums, he felt his spirit fall to a new level of despair. They hadn't found Cloud. They hadn't found one single clue to suggest he was involved with any of this. He realised now how much he had been clinging to this hope, how it had allowed him to avoid any thoughts of a future without… without him.

He bent forward and rested his head in his hands, pulling his hair at the roots. How could he do this? How could he face the possibility that Cloud wouldn't be found? Oh, he couldn't even think about it. Wouldn't think about it. It just wasn't a possibility. So this was a dead end, that didn't mean it was over. It wasn't over. Reno had been hurt and he was sorry for that, but he was going to be okay. They could recover from this and keep looking. He would keep looking.

"Zack,"

He looked up at his uncle, feeling drained and so utterly weary. But he didn't want to sleep. He was in limbo.

"Hey... I'm really sorry Angeal. It was just… I dunno."

Angeal gave him a long look; perplexity and contemplation clear on his face. Zack braced himself for a torrent of anger, and he was extremely surprised when the taller man eventually just sighed softly and then held out his hand.

"Let's go home." He said. Zack stared at him.

"…okay."

He took his uncles hand.

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Reno groaned, scratching at his arm where the Gaia damned needle was shoved into his skin. He gritted his teeth and fell back against the pillows with a huff, bored and agitated and not. Fucking. Tired. He was in a private room, obviously courtesy of his Shinra buddies because if he'd been in on his own he'd be home by now even if his bloody arm had been taken off. The lights were turned out because it was around four in the morning and the television in the corner of the room was switched off. He couldn't be bothered getting up to turn it on.

He lifted his fingers to run along the smooth bandages covering the cuts on his face. A twinge of worry sickened him as he pondered how they'd look. Would he become a monster? A physical reminder of who he had spawned from?

He dropped his hand and looked around the room, remembering now how much he hated fucking hospitals. Hated the Gaia damned memories.

His cheeks were stinging badly, as well as the numerous other bruises and cuts he'd received. The doctor had left two potions on his bedside locker in case of the very thing. He didn't think he really needed one yet though, he wasn't a pussy who couldn't handle a bit of pain.

About a half hour passed, and Reno was finally about to give in to taking a damn potion because his cheeks were burning like holy hell. However, before he made a move for the night stand a clicking sound at the door averted his attention.

He watched as the door opened, expecting some white coat to walk through for a nightly check. However, when he glimpsed the charcoal suit and equally ink-black hair his stomach did a strange flip and he felt moisture accumulate at the back of his neck. He automatically hoisted himself up in the bed, feeling a need to look as composed as possible in the presence of this elegant, impressive man.

He watched as the other approached his bed, so blended in with the darkness it seemed he was a part of it, only his face and hands visible as though the whole room were his body. A creature of the shadows. Deception is strength.

"Hello Reno." He stopped at the foot of the bed. Poised and tall.

"…Uh, hi." Reno muttered back, baffled by the situation. He hadn't exactly expected a night-time visitor. Certainly not this person.

"I expected you to be asleep." Tseng murmured, looking about the room.

"Uh… but ya still came here anyway?" He chuckled awkwardly, twisting the edge of the sheet in his hands. "…Most people'd wait till morn'in." Tseng nodded, as though he'd made a good point.

"Yes. Well, I only came to leave this with you." And with that he moved forward and stretched out his arm, revealing a small white piece of paper tucked between his dark fingers. Reno cocked a brow as he took the offering.

"Wha's it?" He mumbled, looking at what appeared to be a phone number printed in black ink. He turned it back and forth in his hands but there was nothing else to see.

"You're actions tonight were quite commendable. For someone of your age, breaching the heart of a criminal base of that scale shows impressive cunning and innovation. You displayed an ability to deceive and to withstand pain and intimidation under stressful circumstances. Though you _did _ultimately fail," he stopped then, as though to ensure Reno had taken in that last point. He barely had, his mind was still chewing over everything else being said. "I feel that with proper training and conditioning, you could prove to a very useful addition."

"To what?" He narrowed his eyes in confusion.

The man leaned down so that his face was just barely lit up by the green light of the drip monitor. There was no emotion of his face, but it wasn't black. Just… hard.

"Our organization. You might have heard of them. There known to most as the Turks."

The boy felt something click inside his mind at the word, and he didn't understand it. Stunned, he could only watch as his mysterious visitor straightened again.

"Anyway, I'll leave you to mull this invitation over. If you reach a decision, use that number." Reno nodded dumbly as the dark man turned to leave. He had questions, a lot of fucking questions, but he couldn't ask them now. His tongue was gone comatose in his mouth.

Before Tseng went out the door he gave one last look back at him. "Keep in mind, Reno, that this is a very rare invitation and one that will not be offered twice. I would think very carefully about your answer. If you're out, you're out forever. If you're in, you're in forever. Understand that."

And so he was gone, Reno was left alone in the room again. He looked down at the card on his lap, partly illuminated by the weak green light. The idea was bizarre to him and he couldn't be sure it was actually real. He'd taken a lot of meds; they could be fucking with his brain. Yeah, that sounded right. A lot more right than the alternative.

That he, Reno, could be a Turk?

Reno the Turk.

Yeah, that just sounded fucking weird.


	24. XXIV

**And now we're back to the main story...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

**This fan fiction contains dark, upsetting psychological and sexual themes so if you are not comfortable with that kind of thing then please don't read because I don't want to upset anyone.**

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"_Well done Sephiroth."_

"_That was outstanding Sephiroth."_

"_You're an inspiration to us all."_

_Sephiroth nodded, not bothering to give a smile or even make eye contact with any of the insects crowding the hallways as he made his way to his quarters. The seventeen year old loved the excitement of missions, the adrenaline and the release of tension, but he hated this part. The novelty of adoring fans had long worn off and now the compliments and worship were just an irritating noise that left him frustrated and agitated. As if their praise meant anything to him; humans rejoiced over the littlest of things._

"_Never have I seen one SOLDIER take out so many tr-"_

_He sighed and leaned against the closed door, relishing in the peace privacy brought. His room was dark and still, offering a safe retreat for the night. Safe from what, he didn't know, what could he possibly need safety from? _

"_**You were loved by the Goddess and shared none of her blessings. Even as heroes the world hates."**_

_Within three seconds Sephiroth had covered the span of the room and was stood with his Masamune held against the intruder's throat, threatening to end life with one small gesture. His murky eyes drifted over the shadowed form, covered by the black and grey darkness._

"_Who are you?" He demanded, very seriously. This was an uncommon happening. Who would dare break into his room?_

"_**Will you be taking flight towards the planet that hates us**?"_

_The silver haired boy narrowed his eyes and tightened his fingers on the friendly grip of his weapon._

"_I won't ask again." A threat from Sephiroth was no small matter, but he could feel only amusement rolling off the stranger. _

"_**For you it becomes quite usual to lose your dreams and pride. The Goddess herself has already let go of the arrow from her bow**."_

_He growled and moved, perhaps prepared to strike a wounding blow. He would not be ignored._

"_So you are the great child hero." _

_He stopped. The voice that seemed so mature and eerie one moment ago now sounded boyish and almosy haughty, the vowels in each word unatturally emphasised and elongated. The voice of the upper class._

_The figure chuckled in a sniding manner and walked past him, moving towards the light switch and flicking it. With the room now illuminated Sephiroth was able to take in the form as it turned towards him. Ear length hazel hair framed a triangular face, striking crimson eyes peared out from the porclain skin to regard him. The figure was dressed in a black leather coat with golden cufflings and similar coloured buttons surrounding the collar. He was attractive, with a youthful face that held a strange kind of effemanacy. _

"_I'm Genesis Rhaspodos." The boy smirked, flicking a bang away from his eye in a way that showed he was aware of his appealing looks. Sephiroth raised a brow, his guard lowering._

"_Sephiroth." He replied briskly._

"_Oh I know. The great Sephiroth, hero of our people. Destined for greatness." He couldn't tell if the other was being complementary or mocking, so he reacted to neither. He suspected the latter though. _

"_**When will the beasts of this world bring their fight to an end? From the dark sky, the Goddess comes whirling down."** _

_Sephiroth frowned, not understanding this odd recital of what seemed to be poetry. Why was he doing that?_

"_Why do you talk like that?" He realized the question sounded quite childish but the answer was more important to him at the moment. Who was this person and why on the planet would he risk sneaking into his room, only to babble nonsense to him?_

"_Why do **you** talk like that?" The stranger, Genesis, mirrored. He crinkled his forehead._

"_I...Answer the question." He ordered, shaking his head. He was not flustered._

"_Answer mine."_

_The silver haired SOLDIER growled angrily and turned away from the boy, refusing to play such futile games._

"_Please leave my room." He said as he placed his weapon against the wall. This boy was strange but he was no threat._

"_Anger, like a demon. Sadness like an angel." The boy whispered. "I knew you would be like this." Sephiroth turned then, and regarded him._

"_Like what?"He asked, needing to know the answer more than he'd like to admit. Genesis brought his eyes over to his left, as thought he were thinking about something._

"_Broken." _

_Sephiroth stomach dropped, a chilling coldness washing over him. His skin broke out in goose bumps and he tensed his shoulders. He didn't understand the reaction. He didn't understand the word. Broken? What did that mean? He was not broken. He was powerful, strong, intelligent… a hero. _

"_You are wrong."_

_Genesis smiled and clicked his tongue._

"_**When will the beasts of this world bring their fight to an end**?"_

"_I am no beast." He took a step towards the boy._

"_No," Genesis smiled brightly, taking a copying step towards him. "You are a hero."_

"_I am." He replied evenly. Again unable to decipher the other's intent. _

"_But who says beasts aren't heroes?" The strange answers and learned riddles were starting to grate on his tired mind but he couldn't help wanting more of the conversation. It interested him, and that didn't happen often._

"_Why did you say I was broken?" Sephiroth tried to look firm but a strange self-conciseness had kicked in, making him feel flustered and uncomfortable. No one had spoke to him like this before. It was both intriguing and infuriating. _

"_Because you are like me." There was no hint of anything on the boys face to betray the emotions behind the words._

"_You would insult yourself like that?" He bit the inside of his cheek when Genesis suddenly smiled brightly and laughed out loud. His heart began beating fast. Was he being made fun of?He wouldnt stand for that._

"_**My soul corrupted by vengeance**." Genesis breathed out between laughs. He leaned his hands on his knees and took a loud breath. Once he got himself under control he stood up and smiled at Sephiroth._

"_You are beautiful." Sephiroth was about to bite out a reply when a loud knocking on the door inturuppted them. Genesis smirked._

"_**Healer of worlds**," he whispered as Sephiroth went to answer it. Two visitors in one night was beyond normality. _

_Being prepared to brush off some Shinra official, Sephiroth was startled to be met with a young man, a few years older than himself. He had never seen this person before; the strongly boned face, with deep grey eyes and jet black hair, was not one he would forget. _

"_May I help you?" He asked when the stranger didn't say anything. The boy nodded and there was anger apparent on his face, which lined his lips and forehead. _

"_I'm looking for my friend. You may have seen him. Hazel hair, looks like a little girl, talking a lot of nonsensical poetic tripe." Sephiroth opened his mouth to reply, but then he felt Genesis brush against his back._

"_Angeal!" The strange boy clicked his tonge,"how did you know I was here?" Sephiroth caught the sarcasm. He looked to see the new one gazing sternly at his supposed friend._

"_Well," the dark haired boy started "I knew you wanted to meet Sephiroth and I just thought of the most dishonorable way you would go about doing it." He smirked, "here we are."_

_Sephiroth felt awkward standing in the middle of a conversation he didn't feel privy to. The new person must have noticed this, as he turned his attention back to him and held out his hand._

"_Angela Hewley," he said as Sephiroth took the offered limb and shook it. He was well used to that form of social interaction at least. _

"_Sephiroth."Though the boy already knew his name, it was still proper to give it himself. _

_The dark man stood back and crossed his arms. There was something about his face, or his posture or hi sway of speaking, which Sephiroth liked. He posessed a good mind, an attribute not common with most of the Malboro walking the halls of Shinra. _

"_You're new here. Where is it you come from?" He questioned, throwing a look over his shoulder at the smirking hazel-head._

"_My companion and I trained at a Shinra branch in Mideel. We have been accepted here on an honorary role." There was pride in Angeal's voice as he explained that part. _

"_I suppose that is a good thing?" Sephiroth didn't think entering this world was anything to be glad about. Angeal kept a neutral expression and shrugged._

"_I suppose." He replied with a nod. He took in Sephiroth's appearance. "It seems you are in need of a rest, come on Genesis, we will get to see more of Sephiroth in training." He looked at Sephiroth while he said it, as though wanting to see a reaction._

"_Of course, we will spend many years together." Genesis smiled as he passed him, conveying some sort of hidden message in his eyes. "Best friends."_

"_Sorry about his behavior," Angeal placed a hand on Genesis' shoulder, squeezing until he made the smaller boy wince. "Have a good night."_

"_And you," Sephiroth answered, nodding at him. He brought his eyes towards Genesis' ever smirking face. "Goodnight… Genesis."_

"_**Hero of the dawn, Healer of worlds. Dreams of the morrow hath the shattered soul**." Genesis replied as he made his way down the corridor, his smooth voice brushing off the walls._

_Sephiroth stared after the two, an odd sense of… something lingering in his blood._

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"I want it all done by the time I come home."

Cloud nodded; keeping his eyes on the items he had been given. Sephiroth had informed him that he would have to clean his room today, and once a week from now on. He had given him a vacuum and a bucket of cleaning supplies, though he had no idea what he'd use most of them on. There wasn't really anything in this room. It was just a bare, empty space.

"Is that clear?" Sephiroth pressed. Cloud flinched.

"Yes," he answered softly.

Sephiroth took two steps until he was in front of the boy and wrapped his arms around his waist, lifting him up just a bit. As always, he relished in the warmth of Cloud's body, and the feeling of their skin pressing together. It was bliss. Everything with Cloud was bliss.

Utterly content, he kissed his boy's forehead and then moved down to his lips, tasting the mouth slowly. He ignored the sharp intake of breath, the tensing of muscles against him and lack of reciprocation. Small steps first.

"Good boy." He pulled back to look at the blond again. He looked tired, haven been woken up a short while ago by the General. His eyes were slightly red and his cheeks flushed from lethargy, making Sephiroth guilty at being the cause for any ounce of discomfort the boy endured. Well, it really wasnt that much of an issue, Cloud had more than enough oppurtunity to catch up on missed sleep. "Eat your breakfast first. I may be late this evening but we can have dinner together when I come back. Is there anything you feel like?"

"I-I don't mind." That was Cloud's usual response to any question that couldn't be answered with a yes or a no.

"I'll think of something," he kissed Cloud on the tip of his nose, chuckling at the way he scrunched his face up and almost, if he dared, hissed in frustration. He pressed the boy against him once more before releasing him completely. Cloud seemed to visibly relax at the loss of contact. That irked.

Small steps.

"Have a good day Cloud."

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"Sephiroth, I'm glad you're here. A new situation has arisen." He barely had time to shake the snow from his hair before Gale, the director of the Modeoheim branch, was on him with instructions.

"What is it?" He asked, taking the brown file holder from her hands and opening it. Gale kept her eyes on the paper as she talked.

"The Mako reactor on the mountain has been breached and the troops sent to invistigate it killed." The woman's grey eyes barley flickered as she recalled the deaths of the young men. She pushed her black hair from her eyes and continued.

"Radio coverage was lost, as well as all satellite visuals and the surveillance cameras have been deactivated." She gave him a grim smile. "Basically we have no idea what the holy hell is in there. It could be a monster or a terrorist group; I personally think it's the latter."

"The conditions wouldn't suit a group." Sephiroth mumbled. "And it would be an odd target, considering its location and insignificance." Gale nodded, but her lips were pursed.

"It is also unusual in that they haven't demanded anything yet. Usually a terrorist plot would include an ultimatum or a threat of action."

"I'll go up there."

She licked her bottom lip.

"You are the only person I would have confidence in sending. I'll dispatch a group to accompany you an-"

"That won't be necessary." He interrupted the woman. She gave him a confused look.

"But you may need backup."

"I'll bring a _radio_."

Gale looked like she wanted to argue more but she just slumped her shoulders and sighed.

"Alright." She conceded, "who would I be to argue with you?"

"Exactly," he muttered. "I'll be ready to leave within the hour, have a helicopter prepared for me."

"Right."

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The wind was absolutely deafening, blowing and whistling around his head. At this height, the snow that pounded against his exposed skin would have shredded it were he normal man. It was irritating; the noise and the snow and the fact that his unrestrained hair flew about his head, blocking his vision and whipping against his leather coat.

Sephiroth squinted and let his enhanced vision settle on the snow covered building just around a hundred yards ahead of him. He started walking again, taking larger steps as his feet kept sinking into the snow, until he stood in front of a pair of rusted metal doors.

The creak echoed loudly in the metallic warehouse as the door was pushed open, Sephiroth held his sword low and made his way silently into the large area, his eyes flicking back and forth for any sign of movement. There was none. This place was dead; nothing drew breath to exist. He was not naive enough to think that that meant there was no threat around. It was simply not visible yet. He thought now that it might be a monster attack after all, a group of terrorists would never be as suicidal as to confine themselves to such a disadvantageous location.

In complete contrast to outside, the warehouse was eerily silent. So silent in fact, that one could hear the melting snow as it slid down his leather coat and dropped onto the ground. He walked through the bleak area until he arrived at the staircase which he knew lead to the Core.

At that moment a strange feeling passed through his chest. The stairs reminded him of the ones in Cloud's room. Cloud. Cloud Strife was waiting for him right now. He was in his blue room, all soft and clean and warm. He was there waiting for him to return, and Sephiroth had to make sure he completed this assignment as quickly as possible. Cloud needed him. He would die down in that place without him.

Impatient now to finish this quickly, the General made his way briskly up the stairs and into the new room.

The Core was covered in shields of thick metal, with snake like pipes swirling around it, their heads lodged within the tank to seek out the fluid. He could hear the vile liquid pounding away within its confinements, escaping through the tiny pipes in order to spread its treacherous influence among the weak life forms of the planet. He could smell the poison.

He scoffed lightly and circled the structure, dragging his Masamune across it.

**S...Sephiroth. C...Come in Sephiroth.**

He raised his eyebrow and looked down at the radio attached to his waist.

**A...Anything to confirm. **

Rolling his eyes at the theatrics, he picked it up and held it loosely against his mouth.

"No." He muttered.

**O..Okay...K...Keep us posted.**

He clipped the item back in place. The Core let out a thumping sound so he walked closer to inspect the machine. It wasn't damaged at all. It was running perfectly.

The tall man walked out of the room and found himself in a huge round area; he was standing on a bridge that led across to another door. Above and below him hundreds more identical bridges crisscrossed from one wall to another, all leading to different doors or elevators.

He was just about to make his way to the other door across from him when something caught his eye. His nerves lit up as he spun to his side, fast enough to see the flash of red disappear into one of the doors beneath him. Without a second thought he grabbed the rail and flung himself over the side of the bridge, falling through the air and landing on his target with ease, even though it was a forty foot drop. His ears picked up the shuffling sound ahead and he wasted no time in breaking into a run and following the fast target.

The next three minutes were filled with twists and turns around pipes, jumps down tunnels and races through several rooms until eventually Sephiroth seemed to have the upper hand as the figure stopped when he had no where left to run. He sighed softly and shook his head.

"Genesis."

"_Infinite in mystery is the gift of the goddess. We seek it thus, and take to the sky_."

"Ripples form on the water's surface. The wandering soul knows no rest."

Genesis smirked.

"You remembered." His melodic voice brushed against the walls. Sephiroth gave a smirk of his own.

"How could I forget, when you've… beaten it into my head?" He tapped his temple in emphasis and this made the man laugh loudly. Sephiroth smile faded as he ran his eyes over the other's haggard appearance.

"You've been gone for three years." He said, not giving anything away with his voice. Genesis looked towards the floor.

"_The wandering soul knows no rest_." He whispered.

Sephiroth cleared his throat, indicating his refusal to be ignored.

"I've been searching." Genesis muttered, hesitantly.

"Searching?" Sephiroth placed his Masamune back against the wall and took a step towards what he once would have called a friend.

"Searching." The hazel-haired man mirrored. He sighed.

"For?" He drawled, stretching his fingers outwards.

"Answers." Genesis said. The man lowered his lashes and Sephiroth took the time to study the sickly appearance of his grey skin, and the deep purple bags beneath his eyes. He looked tired. And his hair was not the brilliant hazel it once was. In fact, it looked as though someone had washed the color out of Genesis' body and left him as a faded replica of the original. Even his coat looked worn.

"I've always felt, that there was more to my…our existence." Genesis brought his hand up towards his face and rubbed his fingers against one another, his eyes watching as though it were the most fascinating thing in the world. "We are heroes. There has to be a reason for us to exist."

"There is no reason." Sephiroth said flatly."We have life, and do what we can to preserve it. That's all." He spoke the words that he had believed all his life, that he had lived by, and was stunned to find that they no longer made sense to him. Now, he knew that they were nothing but lies spun to him by an impotent, bitter old man who had no notion of what it felt to connect with another human being. To love.

It wasn't all pointless anymore. He had Cloud. Cloud made everything worthwhile. But the other man couldn't know this.

"No," Genesis, oblivious to his inner musings, turned on his heel, eyes flashing with deadly passion. "I refuse to believe that. There has to be a reason. We can't just be leaves, falling from an indifferent tree to provide beauty for a short while before death. There has to be more." Genesis hissed every word, but cut them off when he saw a tired smile rise on Sephiroth's lips. "What?" He demanded, and in that high-pitched indignant question his philosophical persona fell away to reveal the spoilt Banora boy he once was.

"Always so poetic Genesis." Sephiroth clicked his tongue and looked towards the roof of the large red room they were standing in."Never willing to accept things as they are."

Genesis' eyes narrowed into dangerous slits and the leather of his clothing made creaking noises as he stomped over to the General. He stopped when their faces were but inches from touching.

"_My soul corrupted by vengeance_." He drawled as his eyes slid upwards to meet his slightly taller friend's. "I cannot rest. I cannot eat. I cannot think. I need to know who made me like this?" He let out a heavy breath. "A failure."

Sephiroth stepped back and regarded his friend. He looked so different. It made his stomach churn to see the degeneration. What was causing it? But Genesis was still beautiful. Faded as he was, he was still the person who had drawn Sephiroth all that time ago. Different to Cloud, but it was a pleasant comparison.

"You are a hero." He lifted his hand and placed in on the man's shoulder. The leather was soft under his fingertips because of a loss of muscle mass.

"No," Genesis stood back and again that perfectly formed smirk was on his face. Sephiroth felt a tingle in his body at the look, perhaps a remembrance. "You are a hero." He grunted flatly and then walked over to one of the many polls that acted as support beams for structure of the building, gripping it and leaning backwards.

"That's what you think." Sephiroth nodded to himself. "That's why you left."

Genesis hummed and leaned backwards until he was looking at his friend from an upside-down angle. "_She guides us to bliss, her gift everlasting_." He smiled when Sephiroth furrowed his brows.

"Genesis," the silver haired man said firmly. "This is madness. You're ill. You need to return to Midgar."

"It's too late. _The arrow has left the bow of the goddess_."

"And what of Angeal?"

That made the man go quite, and he soon pulled himself up straight and wrapped his arms around the poll. He leaned his head to the side and closed his eyes. "Healer of worlds." He sighed.

"Do you not care?"

Anger flashed across Genesis' face and his body moved as if he were going to lunge. He caught himself though, and with a painful sounding sigh, shook his head.

"I do care. I care."

"Then go back." Sephiroth pressed, taking a few steps forward until he was close enough to read the man better.

Genesis frowned and pressed his forehead against the metal. "_Pride is lost_."

The General brought his fingers up to rub at the bridge of his nose and let out a low growl in his throat.

"Such nonsense."

Neither of them spoke for a while, but eventually something clicked in Sephiroth's mind.

"Why did you come here?" He asked. Genesis blew some hair out of his eyes.

"I wanted to talk to you."

Sephiroth let out an exasperated laugh.

"And this was the only way to get my attention?"

"Probably not."

"And the men you killed?"

"…"

"Genesis…"

"Well you are the hero of Wutia. Your attention is a sought after by everyone on this planet. You can't blame me for being dramatic. _Hero of the dawn_. " All of Sephiroth's good humour left with the bitter breath from Genesis' lungs.

"I wont help you with this. It's madness." He said.

"I know." Genesis pushed off the poll and walked back towards the General, his eyes studying the man intensely.

"You sho-"

"I came here to ask you just that. To come with me. But now I see you wont. You look different."

Sephiroth felt a cold wave of dread flow over his body as the man leaned forward and stared at him with wide, dazed eyes. What ever Genesis was, his skills of perception were deadly. There was nothing Sephiroth could do, no bodily control he could muster to prevent this man from noticing the change in him. He just had to hope that the he was too focused on his current woes to pursue the issue.

"You're brighter." Genesis placed a hand on his arm, making him tense up.

"I think it's being free of that city." He cleared his throat and shook head, "Midgar is... restricting. I'm glad to be out of the place." Half the truth?

"Indeed." Genesis smiled and moved away, a tendril of Sephiroth's hair sliding through his fingers until it fell back into place against the black leather.

Sephiroth kept his cool eyes trained on the other man, his guard heightened. Genesis was a threat now.

"I must take my leave." The man smiled warmly.

"Where are you going?" Sephiroth still couldn't stop the sadness seeping into him, not for himself so much as for his memories. Genesis was a large part of his history, his life.

The man in question pulled a glowing orb from beneath his jacket. A transport materia.

"To where it all began." He said as the small orb lit up.

Sephiroth didn't't say anything as Genesis gazed at him, his smile loosing its pull.

"_Dreams of morrow hath the shattered soul_." He whispered. He gave a short chuckle then stood up straight, bringing the materia into the air.

"But, _Even if the morrow is barren of promises, nothing shall forestall my return_."

A flash of orange and he was gone.

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Zack scratched his thumbnail along the crisp white corner of the page, leaving it fall further onto his lap. He let his head slump against the thick cushion of the couch and closed his eyes.

_Dear Mr. Zackary Fair_

He shook his head and scoffed. He wasn't Zackary Fair anymore. He didn't know who he was. Everything he had though, believed, about the planet had been turned upside down. He didn't know what was right, wrong, good or evil. It was all just one big mess. He had always lived by the code that if you do good, avoid being cruel and stand up for what's right then you could make something out of yourself. Even become a hero; like his uncle was. He wasn't naive, he knew bad things happened to good people all the time…he just never really _knew _it properly.

The planet didn't make sense to him anymore, so how could he create his own identity within it.

_We understand that this has been a difficult time for you,_

They understood. Yeah sure. They, the cabalistic _them. _Who were they? He honestly wanted to find these people who claimed so easily that they understood what he was going through. How could they understand? How could anyone? Because their shops were still open, and the schools, bars and ever other Gaia-damned establishment in the city was still functioning. The cars were still driving, the busses and trains were still working, people were still going to work and coming home and doing their normal everyday activities. Obviously then, none of them neither understood nor cared what he was going through.

_And for many others involved, including members of this school and its staff._

That had to be a joke. Many? He'd say that the percentage of people in that school who actually gave a shit about what had happened was well below five, including the staff. They didn't care at all. The school had taken two days off, had a little prayer ceremony which he didn't attend, and then went back to its normal routine, sans Cloud.

The fact that they could even write something like that showed how little thought they put into any of this. Gaia, he really hated them now.

At the end of the day though, that was just a school. Another part of that brainwashing social system conspiracy theorists were always ranting about. It was all mechanics, with no real heart or insights. For that reason, he could just about forgive them.

What was worse was watching his friends, Cloud's friends, slowly drift away day by day. They didn't mean to, and they tried to pretend that they weren't. But he could see the hope fade from them, and the resignation setting in. The 'kind of's' were the first to go. People who Cloud kind of knew, kind of talked to now and then, kind of hung out with every so often. They were the first to lose interest, if they had any in the first place besides the excitement of the whole ordeal. Then the police and detectives and even Angeal had started giving up, on the grounds that there was simply no evidence whatsoever. The word runaway had even been brought up, which made the teen too mad to think about, so he didn't.

He finally came to grips with the fact that there was no one looking anymore, not really. It was just him, and he would continue to do so.

But all that, he expected; authority and pretenders were predictable. But watching the people closest to Cloud move on, that hurt. It hurt like a poisonous arrow to the chest, like an anvil to the spine. It wasn't that they didn't care, or didn't want the boy to come back. It was just that they were accepting he was gone and embracing the fact that they would have to move on. Zack didn't understand that, and it pissed him off royally. It just couldn't end like this. Cloud… his Cloud. What was possibly the nicest boy on the planet was gone just like that. It wasn't right. He couldn't accept that.

_But it is our duty to inform you that you're absence from this school for such a period will make it difficult for you to graduate._

The period of time was currently one month, three weeks and three days. That was how long he'd been absent from school, how long he'd been living in hell. How long Cloud had been left alone to endure torture and pain and whatever those who took him decided to do. Three months. How could one strange phone call turn into this?

He hadn't gone back to school since; he just couldn't stand the idea. It would have been too hard. The place was haunted; he would see reminders of the boy sitting in every classroom, walking the corridors, running on the field, sitting under the trees, waiting at the gates… It would be too hard. His parents had been on to him about it a lot; especially his father who was a spokesman for 'education equals success'. Angeal had been pestering him about it too but Zack could tell there wasn't much passion to his words. He knew why Zack didn't want to go back, and understood it. That he was thankful for at least.

Yes, Tifa, Leon, Axel, Reno, Yuna, Riki and even Yuffie had gone back to school eventually, seemingly not willing to risk their precious futures. How they could even think of things so trivial was beyond the dark-haired teenager, and he surmised that deep down they just didn't care enough.

They even started visiting him and talking about things completely unrelated to Cloud. School gossip, teachers and other trivial things he didn't care much about in the first place. The started trying to convince him to return to school for his exams, and even invited him to a few different parties. He answered them by acting like a prick until they left. He found that he was acting like a prick often lately, and didn't really have the decency to care.

_If you do take the final examinations, and acquire acceptable grades you may graduate. Otherwise there are several different options available to you, including a summer course or repeating the second semester in the following term._

Summer. Second term. He really hoped that by either time the most important thing on his mind would be graduating school. Wouldn't it be great if Cloud was found sometime before then? And the two of them could work on fixing up their education together. Cloud wouldn't be graduating for three years yet, but he'd be behind in his own work. And knowing him he'd do whatever possible to catch up. Brain Box. Yeah, they could both go to summer school, goofing and complaining about the unfairness of it. Then they could just hang out like they did every year. Just the two of them. Best friends…

It wasn't going to happen though. It was a complete dream. Zack found it mind-boggling that the though of just being with Cloud was a dream now. Cloud, his best friend since they were children. The person he had always watched out for, protected and wanted to see happy. How could he be gone like this? How could Zack have let it happen? He was a failure. He had let it happen, and he couldn't help him now. When he needed it most. He was nothing like Angeal. He wasn't anything. He was just a miserable person who was going to spend the rest of his life like this. Hoping, wishing, and waiting for his dream to come true.

He wouldn't be happy again, not until he was with Cloud. Wherever that was.

_Thank you for taking the time to read this, Mr Fair. We hope to be in contact with you soon. _

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"You did very well." Sephiroth complimented as he studied the room, noting that aside from a brighter looking carpet, it appeared much the same. But Cloud had done as he was told, and for that he would be praised. He turned back to his boy with a pleasant smile on his face.

Cloud nodded, standing awkwardly near him, his arms were wrapped around his midsection, his hands hidden away.

"Did it take you long?" Sephiroth walked over to him, and placed a hand on top of his head. The blond's shoulders slumped a small bit as he looked towards the floor.

"No, only around an h-hour." The answer was given in a strained and fearful voice, making it seem as though it had come from a small child not a young adult. He seemed to be stuttering more lately, and Sephiroth wondered if that wasn't an after-effect of the Thundara materia. It was more than likely just a nervous habit though; the teen had been through a difficult transition.

"Excellent, well you must be hungry then." Sephiroth's voice was drawling and higher than normal; patronizing. But aside from a twitch of his lips, Cloud didn't react to it.

The General pulled on the boy's shoulders to bring him closer, and then bent down to kiss him. He closed his eyes, so he wouldn't have to acknowledge the disgust, horror and terror that the boy still displayed during this act.

Sephiroth dragged the kiss on for a few minutes until finally he pulled away and smirked at the breathless boy. Did Cloud have tears in his eyes again?

"Come." He whispered brushing some yellow bangs aside. He stared at the despondent face; so sad but so painfully attractive, and his groin tightened. But he had to ignore that need for now, and so he grasped the boy's hand in his and led the way up the stairs and out of the room.

Once they reached the dining room that contained the smaller the house's two tables, he pulled out a chair and instructed his young beauty to sit.

"I'll be back in one moment." He mumbled, ruffling the boy's hair affectionately.

To think that just over a year and a half ago he hadn't known Cloud. It was un fathomable. How had he ever existed without his boy? How had he survived one mundane day after another without returning to this?

He hadn't. He had been dead all along. He had been a corpse. Floating through the motions of life without any inclination of what it was like to live. Cloud was his reason for existence. His core.

He sighed as he removed the roast from the oven, taking a fork in order to check its tenderness.

He pitied Genesis. The man must be living through that still. He had no Cloud; he had no love in his life, no reason for existing. He was on a pilgrimage to find absolution but he wouldn't find it. In the end his failure would drive him mad.

Sephiroth was aware that it could easily have been him. If he had not found his saviour he may very well be on the path to destruction with his old friend. He may have even believed his affection for that friend to be the extent of human intimacy.

He spent a few minutes preparing the food on the two plates, the smell of potatoes and meat enticing his senses, until finally he was ready to return to his boy.

Everything really _was _so perfect, but then why...

"I'm sorry for making you wait love." He said as he walked back into the dining room. Cloud looked up, dazed as though he had been deep in thought.

"S'okay." He answered softly as he gripped his fork in his fist, staring down at his food bleakly. "This looks...nice." The complement was awkward and clearly forced, but Cloud had learned what ungratefulness would lead to.

"Thank you Cloud." Sephiroth practically preened, smiling very intensly at his companion.

Cloud cleared his throat and turned his attention to his food, as he normally did when in this situation. Sephiroth allowed it and began eating his own meal. He kept his eyes on Cloud though, who pointedly avoided them in return.

"I've noticed that they haven't mentioned you once on the news this past week." Sephiroth eventually said as he lifted a glass of Mideel red wine to his lips. It wasn't his usual drink but he did enjoy it with food. He didn't give any to Cloud. He was far too young; it would be inappropriate.

Cloud's fork made a screeching sound against his plate, his face turning a deep shade of red.

"It seems they giving up." Sephiroth continued as though he were talking about the weather. "I told you Cloud. None of them cared about you. You were fortunate that I found you. I would never give up on you so easily."

"No." Cloud whispered. Sephiroth tilted his head.

"No?" He drawled. The blond took a breath and put down his fork.

"J-just because they stopped t-talking about it on the news, it...doesn't mean they've given up." Sephiroth was surprised at that; it was the most Cloud had spoken in over three weeks.

"Perhaps not yet, but they will. The world forgets everyone Cloud." He ran his finger around the edge of his glass as he talked. Cloud shook his head.

"That's not true." He countered. "My mom wouldn't forget me. She wouldn't. Or Za... m-my friends"

"Or Zack?" Sephiroth hissed, leaning forward and slapping his hand down on the table top, making everything quake. Cloud shrunk back in his seat, his fingers clasping in front of him.

"No. I..." He couldn't form the proper words for an argument. Sephiroth smiled; a nasty smug smile.

"It doesn't matter anyway. They will never find you. Not your mother, not your friends. Not even your little... crush." The silver-haired man smirked at the crest-fallen look on his charge's face. He was so easy to hurt, and he looked so attractive when frowning.

They both resumed eating, although Cloud only took a few more small bites until he put down his fork altogether.

"Can I go back to my room?" He asked, letting out a tired sigh. Sephiroth licked the corner of his mouth.

"I'm not finished." He stated, holding out his wine glass in indication.

"Okay." Cloud mumbled, sitting back against his seat and looking off to the side.

He took his time finishing his drink, not feeling that he had any obligation to rush on account of someone he had done so much for. Eventually he did finish and led the cream-clad boy back down to his bedroom.

"Go and brush your teeth." Sephiroth instructed as he let go of his arm. Cloud nodded glumly and did as told.

While the boy was in the bathroom Sephiroth walked over to his bed and pulled the covers back, as he did some nights when he was home early enough to see the boy to bed.

While he waited for Cloud's re-emergence, Sephiroth's mind drifted back to the events of the day. Genesis had presented himself as a problem today, and his instincts told him that it was not the last he'd see of the man. It was bad to think that way; to want to be rid of the presence of someone who had played an important part in his life. But things had changed now; Sephiroth had a life to protect. Genesis may pose a problem in future, and for that he could not be tolerated.

The sound of the bathroom door opening brought him out of his thoughts and he smiled a bit as he watched Cloud awkwardly walk over to him. One would think that he would have been used to his presence by now. He stood up and let his boy lie down on the bed. Cloud seemed tired, his body falling heavily onto the soft surface.

Sephiroth pulled the quilt up until it was just below the boy's chin. Cloud really was a work of art. His features were so structured; they were the epitome of perfection, what millions of men and women paid to try and replicate. But they never could. No one could. Because it wasn't his features or his body that made Cloud so beautiful, it was what was behind them. Cloud had a soul. He thought and he empathized and he felt. He didn't care about how he looked; he didn't't care about material things, or things kids his age would normally concern themselves with. He wasn't conceited or selfish. He was good, and that's what made him Cloud. That's why Sephiroth was drawn to him.

Feeling compelled, Sephiroth leant down and kissed Cloud. His lips were slack and unmoving, more so than usual, but he didn't care. He didn't care about anything when he was kissing Cloud strife.

He pulled away a while later and placed his hand on the boy's cheek. Cloud's eyes were watery and his lips tilting downwards.

"So sad Cloud?" He whispered, brushing his thumb beneath the boy's left eye.

Cloud swallowed and brought his hand up from beneath the blanket to rub at his eye. Sephiroth pulled back and watched him.

"You know why." Cloud mumbled. Sephiroth sucked in a breath through his teeth.

"Yes, I do. And I understand it, but you have to get over it Cloud. You have to move on from your old life."

"But I miss them." Clouds voice cracked and his face became flushed. .

"I understand."

"No, you don't." The teen's eyes were completely full of water now and he sniffed. "You just think I'm being a child but I'm not. Anyone would act the way I do. It's not fair."

"Perhaps I don't understand." Sephiroth began, "I had a different life to you Cloud. I never had anyone close to me as a child."

Cloud remained silent, sniffing occasionally.

"But I never let that deter me from achieving what I wanted to achieve, and I won't let it deter you."

"What am I suppose to achieve locked down all the time?"

Sephiroth frowned; not liking the fact that the boy had a fair argument. Cloud had a point in what he said, Sephiroth knew. He just...didn't care. As far as he was concerned Cloud was someone for him to keep and protect. He didn't need an education, or a purpose or dreams, he just needed Sephiroth.

"A-ah."

Confused, Sephiroth looked down to see his own hand entwined tightly within the boy's hair, pulling the scalp. He loosened his grip immediately; feeling ashamed at his lack of attention.

"You seem tired," he muttered as he stroked the spot in apology, "so I'll take my leave early tonight." He almost felt spiteful when he saw the relief the boy displayed at hearing this. Cloud should be happy to be with him. He shouldn't want him to go.

He licked the inside of his teeth and pushed himself up into a standing position. He looked down at the boy one more time, trying to solidify in his mind the image.

Cloud was his.

_The Gift of the Goddess_

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For Cloud, the next few weeks were filled with endless sadness, depression and boredom. He had never felt so dead in all his life. There was just...nothing. Nothing to get out of the bed for, nothing to look forward to, no reason to even live. It was hell. He was in hell, and there was nothing he could do about it. He had to go along with everything that was happening to him, he had to act polite and calm towards his tormenter, nod when he wanted to refuse, remain quite when he wanted to scream, obey when he wanted to object. It was frustrating; frustrating to the point that he sometimes felt his stomach tightening and his chest cramp. He found himself taking showers every day, when he thought his captor was gone, and screaming, screaming at the top of his lungs, until his body ached and he felt better. It never lasted though, it was only a temporary release, and once his mind started working he would be back to square one.

The fear was terrible; there was no way to describe how bad it was. It ate him, gnawed at his mind and made sure he could never find an ounce of true peace. He did try, he tried to keep himself calm, he shut his mind off, he curled up in his blankets and turned on the television. He still watched the news but usually that made him feel worse more-so than better, so he began watching other programs, movies and comedies; nothing dark or deep. He needed to focus on something light in his life, even if it was from behind a screen and acted out by falsely smiling actors and actresses. It helped a little; the worry and fear and depression actually dissipated at these times, but never for long and it was always brought back, maybe by a comment from an actor, the ending of a movie, or worst of all; the arrival of Sephiroth.

He hated that man. Truly hated him. He was so evil, so bad. He knew everything he was doing to him was wrong and just didn't care. He tried to act as though everything was normal, as if they were a couple. Cloud couldn't stand it. It was just so morbid. He would act so friendly, so nice and concerned and then the moment Cloud made any kind of objection or mistake his real character would shine through. That was the real Sephiroth, that evil, nasty, threatening creature was the one who had ended so many lives. Cloud had had it all wrong before; there was no honor in Sephiroth, he was not a hero. He was a trained killing machine whose psychopathic tendencies were allowed to flourish under the banner of war. Everyone had been fooled.

But Sephiroth didn't want to kill him; not yet anyway. No, what he wanted was equally as bad. He wanted sex. Cloud had never been comfortable with the topic, he was a teenage boy and his hormones were definitely working but he could just never picture himself…doing it. It was embarrassing. He would have to be naked and… did he want to do it with a boy or girl? He actually couldn't imagine doing it with a girl, but a boy would be so… what if their body was better than his…or they were bigger? There were just too many questions and he didn't like to think about it. He had just hoped it would get better eventually. That one day it would just happen, when he was drunk or something.

That was gone now though. He would have to face the problem sooner than he thought because Sephiroth wanted it and he had no way to refuse him. Every day he woke up with the fear, the horrible thought that it was the day. The day he would be forced to have sex with his captor. He couldn't stand it. He just…Gaia, he couldn't even imagine it. With Sephiroth? It would be awful. He would be rough and cruel and he would pay no mind to his reluctance or fear, just like when he kissed him, hungry and groping without any consideration for him. He hated it, he didn't want to be touched or kissed, and he just wanted to be left alone. He didn't want anyone to touch him ever again.

He didn't want to be raped.

Just the thought of it. Sephiroth was always so mocking and patronizing, and to be naked in front of him and face that kind of criticism would just be terrible. He was young; he was only fifteen so his body wasn't properly developed yet. He knew he was thin and small and hoped that he would build up muscle as he grew and that he would gain more confidence in himself. He was going to save up for a gym membership and maybe some classes. He'd often fantasized about the bulkier version of himself that he one day hoped to be, and it made him feel better about himself.

Now he had to be in front of Sephiroth, who was tall and built like a mythical god, and have his puny body scrutinized. Could someone die of humiliation? And that was only part of it. There was the actual…penetration. How much would it hurt and how would it be? He couldn't wrap his mind around the thought of it. It made him sick to his stomach and he had actually thrown up several times in the past few weeks from nerves and worry. It was his body; he didn't want it taken from him as well. Would even that be taken? Wasn't it enough?

But he shouldn't think about things like that. All he could do was deal with every day as it came because he had no control over his destiny from now on. The future held no promise, no brightness and if one spent two long peering into a black hole they would eventually get sucked in. He wasn't prepared to let that happen yet. Maybe one day he would let the oblivion take him. But there was still something holding him back from that, though he had no notion what it was.

Yes, Cloud spent his days avoiding any thought of the morrow, because at the moment it was barren of promises. That was the only way to survive in his situation.

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**1 month later.**

Cloud's finger twitched as the bandages were unwrapped from around them, he winced, half expecting the cuts to still be open. A few days before he'd been upstairs and had tripped with a glass in his hand. The glass had smashed and two large pieces had lodged in his index and middle fingers. It hurt badly.

Sephiroth smiled as the last of the white material was taken away, he let it fall to the floor and then gently lifted the small hand, his eyes studying the scabbing gashes. He was pleased with what he saw.

"Good." He muttered, looking up at the boy who had his eyes tilted downward, a small frown on his lips. Cloud didn't like to be reminded of the incident. He'd been embarrassed and hurt.

"I'm glad that you won't have to wear the bandages tomorrow." He said, smiling at the thought.

Cloud looked up, curiosity edging his expression.

"Why?"

Sephiroth gave him a chilling, mysterious smile. It made his skin prickle.

"Don't you remember love?" Sephiroth tilted his head while he stroked his thumb over the top of the hand.

Cloud honestly didn't know what his kidnapper was talking about. Had he forgotten something? What was it?

Unable to remember, he furrowed his brows and stared at Sephiroth, wanting an answer.

"Tomorrow you turn sixteen, and to commemorate that milestone, we will finally be together as one."

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**Uh oh… that's all I'm saying.**

**As always I hope everyone enjoyed the new chapters and I look forward to hearing what you guys have to say, be it bad or good or just plain perverted ;) I really loved how everyone responded to chapter 22, the reviews were so detailed and encouraging so thank you all. **

**Some of you were wondering if I have an ending planned for this story yet and the answer is that I do but there are still several chapters left until I reach that point. However, the pace of the plot should pick up from here on out and I apologies if again this chapter felt slow and repetitive. **

**I'm literally too tired to say anymore so I'll see you all next chapter.**


	25. XXV

**And now we're back to the main story...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

**This fan fiction contains dark, upsetting psychological and sexual themes so if you are not comfortable with that kind of thing then please don't read because I don't want to upset anyone.**

**This is a very adult chapter so if you're not comfortable with anything mentioned above then I would advise you not to read this. Seriously.**

**Also everyone, especially TheFalling, watch out for the *******

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Cloud stared at the pile of folded clothes sitting untouched on the bed, his teeth unconsciously chewing his bottom lip as he did. He looked towards the door his captor has departed from several minutes ago, as if it would vivaciously give him some answers.

In front of him was the clothing that Sephiroth insisted he wear tonight. His stomach knotted and coiled as he wondered what exactly would be happening that would warrant a change in his normal dress. He felt sick with nerves and didn't know what to do with himself to handle the fear. Sephiroth's smile had been too…big.

This was one of the worst days yet; from the moment Cloud had woken he'd been swarmed with sickness and depression that pushed into every part of his body until it could hold no more. Today was his birthday… his birthday. He was sixteen today. How had he not remembered? It was probably because this place he was in felt separated from the rest of the planet, and therefore he found it hard to grasp the concept of time within it. From the second he'd opened his eyes in this blue room to when he stood there at that very moment, it seemed as if it had been one long, unmoving stream of consciousness. He couldn't think in days or weeks, not as he had thought of them before. The fact that he himself was still growing and changing was even harder to grasp. He didn't want to grow here; he didn't want this to be any part of his journey. But he knew now that it would be.

It would be the end.

It wasn't that birthdays had ever been important to him. He had never been a birthday person, preferring to keep the event quite and maybe have some food with friends or dinner with his mom. Yuffie, the self proclaimed events planner of the group, would always make a big deal out of her friend's parties and announce to the whole school that there would be a party but Cloud had actually managed to get away with it so far. However, Yuffie had promised him that his 'sweet' sixteenth was gonna be the big one. He'd been dreading it.

Irony was cruel.

The memory made his chest hurt. Who would have thought that this is how he would be spending his next birthday? Alone, afraid, locked in a room and waiting for General Sephiroth to come down ad introduce him to a new form of torment.

Feeling his throat tighten, Cloud swallowed and made his way towards the bathroom, fearful of what Sephiroth would do if he did not "shower and dress".

He locked the door behind him and tried to close off his mind as he unbuttoned his shirt and then slipped off the matching shorts. He kicked them to the corner, a little more harshly than normal, and then turned on the shower before stepping in, not caring that the water was too hot.

He was beginning to really panic now. Sephiroth was so excited about tonight, it…couldn't mean anything good. What was he planning? In the back of his mind he knew the answer and the tension of trying to deny it was making him feel light ill.

He immersed his face under the steaming waterfall, his breath hitching as he closed his mouth too late and his throat was flooded with the water. Coughing, he rubbed up and down his arms, trying to work the cold feeling from them. It never really went fully though. There was no real warmth to contend with it.

He didn't want to be here. He didn't want to be here. He couldn't be here. It wasn't fair. He-he wouldn't survive this. He hated Sephiroth. Hated, hated, hated.

"Fuck." He slammed his hand against the tiled wall, clenching his teeth until he thought they would break. The shower was the only place he'd expressed his anger and frustration these past few weeks. Sephiroth couldn't hear him here.

The shower was turned off ten minutes later as he stepped out and wrapped a towel around his waist. He hated the feeling of the towel and he hated using this bathroom. It wasn't his. He didn't fit here and he never wanted to.

He wanted to go home.

Furiously rubbing at his eyes, he made his way out of the room and towards the bed where the clothing was laid out. He had half a mind to fling it away and put on his usual outfit, shove it in Sephiroth's face that he couldn't force him to do what ever he wanted. It was just a thought though. It wouldn't really happen because he knew if tried to protest Sephiroth would just force him to do as he'd been told and probably hurt him afterwards.

The word that described the feeling Cloud got when he saw what Sephiroth wanted him to wear was 'uncanny'. Cloud had once done a school project on a psychoanalyst who wrote that the feeling of the uncanny is brought on not by experiencing something foreign and strange but by the exact opposite. He believed that the uncanny came about when something from ones past reappears under unusual and strange circumstances in the present and its familiarity causes distress in the subject's mind.

That was definitely what Cloud was feeling as he looked at the clothes, _his _clothes on the bed. These were the clothes he had worn on the last day of his old life. The clothes he had been kidnapped in. Why, after months of being forced to wear the same thing, did Sephiroth now want him to wear these? It seemed so…final. As if the gesture was symbolic of the fact that something was going to happen on that day which would change Cloud's life forever.

The teen had to bite his cheek in order to stave off the urge to vomit. Would he die today? Despite everything that had happened, the thought was still terrifying to him.

Taking a breath, Cloud gently picked up the folded T-shirt and let it hang from his hands. It had been washed and pressed and after months of wearing the same white outfit, the black stood out vividly in his eyes. He slowly pulled it onto himself, his skin forming goose bumps at its coolness and tingling at the contrast of the soft cotton with the sterile linen of his normal attire. These clothes felt like foreign entities on his skin; odd.

As his finished dressing in the dark jeans, socks and dark leather jacket, the teen couldn't stop his mind from flashing back to the last time he had put these clothes on. Had that been real? Had his life ever been anything but this room with all its fear and misery? He didn't think so. There had never been a time where he had worn these clothes and felt happiness at the coming day. It was impossible.

Once he was fully dressed he walked back to the bathroom, morbidly curious about his appearance. The mirror was clearing up, fog just lingering on the edges, so he was able to get a clear view of himself.

He looked like himself. Or a tired version of that person.

His old life flew through his mind and he had to squeeze his eyes closed and take deep breaths in order to keep himself from getting a panic attack.

Mom.

Zack.

The blond ruffled his wet hair and went back into 'his' bedroom, sitting down on the bed and waiting with increasing sickness for his captor to come back.

Fourty-two minutes later said tormenter did arrive.

Cloud tried to swallow his fear and stood up, fisting his suddenly sweaty hands tightly at his sides.

At the first look of his boy Sephiroth felt his heart stop, his blood turn hot and the muscles in his groin tighten. Cloud looked…unbelievable. He liked the innocent Cloud, dressed in simple cream, all pale and pure like the angel he was, but this was different. This was what Cloud used to look like, when he had first fallen in love with him. The dark colors contrasted with his pastel features, making his blue eyes and yellow hair stand out all the more dramatically.

"Cloud." He hummed, walking towards the stiff teen. The colour seemed to drain from Cloud's face when he stopped in front of him and placed both of his hands on his neck, his fingers curling under his jawbone. Did he know what was going to happen tonight?

.

"Happy birthday." He lifted the boy's face towards his own, giving a smile when those glossy orbs rose to him. Unhappy boy.

He wanted Cloud to be happy that day. He wanted him to smile and enjoy himself but he knew that wouldn't happen. Cloud was so stubborn and constantly refused to see what was in front of him. All Sephiroth could hope for was that Cloud would at least be pleasant in the evening, and that he himself could make the ordeal as non-threatening for his boy as possible. This was something they had to do in order to truly be together. He and Cloud would share something tonight that no one from the boy's past or future would ever be a part of. Cloud belonged to him, and it was time to make it so.

Possessiveness swarmed in his chest and he found himself wrapping his arms around the blond and then bringing their lips to meet in the first kiss of the day.

Cloud tried to remain still and calm as the man let out a muffled moan, the large hands tightening against his back almost painfully. He clenched his eyes shut as he felt the horrible, uncomfortable feeling of the tongue exploring the walls of his mouth. His nerves were on alert that day so everything seemed to feel even more…real. Everything was vivid. The silver hair brushing against his cheek, the fingers squeezing his back, the lips against his, the wetness of the man's tongue, the hardness of his teeth against his bottom lip, the skin against his chin. It was too much. He couldn't stop his breathing from speeding up. He couldn't breath. He couldn't breath. He had to get away. It was too hot.

He tensely brought his hands up to push lightly against Sephritoh's large chest.

Sephiroth didn't realise how long he had let the kiss go on for until he felt gentle pressure against his sternum. His eyes opened slowly to meet with Cloud's wide ones. He pulled back, a string of saliva following his lips for a moment before it broke off and fell against Cloud's chin.

The blond continued to breathe heavily as he wiped his chin with the back of his hand, grimacing at the wetness. He stared at his captor who was also regaining his breath. He felt ill again, and the thought that he wasn't going to be left alone only heightened it.

Sephiroth was so hard he was tempted to just skip everything he had planned and take the boy on the bed right now.

"This is a special night Cloud." He said, lifting his hand to play with a blond lock resting on the boys shoulder, his hair was getting rather long. "Turning sixteen is an important time in a man's life. It's when they discard the relics of childhood and embrace the future. This is just the first step, I'm going to be there with you and I'm going to watch you become the man I know you will be. I will watch over you and guide you. Tonight I will show you one of the most important, and enjoyable, parts of adulthood." He smiled when Cloud sucked in a breath.

"It's not a big deal." Cloud clasped his hands together, twining his fingers tightly; his expression was stony and stiff. "It's just a birthday I never really cared about them."

Sephiroth gave the boy a fond look.

"I understand." He said, "You think that way because that is what you've been taught. No one from your old life ever bothered to show you how important you are, and how much this day should be celebrated."

Cloud remained mute.

"Come." Sephiroth held out his hand for him to take. Cloud wanted to slap it away but the look on Sephiroth's face warned him against it. He bit the inside of his cheek and placed his hand on top of the other's, glad that Sephiroth was wearing gloves.

The short walk felt like a dream to Cloud, and before he knew it he was standing outside a closed door, Sephiroth looking at him with a piercing gaze. His stomach was knotting up but he tried to keep himself calm.

"Happy birthday, love."

With that the door was opened and Cloud was led inside with a hand on his shoulder.

Sephiroth watched with satisfaction as Cloud looked around the room with surprise. He led the silent boy further into the area, filled with pride at what he had achieved. He had spent a good portion of the day preparing for Clouds birthday celebration and was glad to see his work hadn't been in vain.

The lights in the room had been turned off so the only illumination came from the small materia candles littered around the large space. Materia candles were different to normal ones because the worked with magic instead of fire and that meant that instead of just an orangey-yellow hue the room flickered in red, blue, yellow and primarily green. This gave the room an otherworldly effect, the colors shone and mirrored off the gleaming walls, creating patterns and beams across the area. He imagined it was how it would be if one were standing in the depths of the life-stream, and that was appropriate in so many ways.

Sephiroth watched Cloud look around the area, his eyes no longer blue but twinkling with the different colours they took in. Once he had closed the door closed he squeezed his love's hand, breaking him out of his daze. Sephiroth brought the hand to his mouth and kissed it.

Cloud felt like he was in a different world, he had never seen anything like this room. It didn't even look like a room actually; it looked like an endless abyss with colors and shapes dancing within the darkness. He could make out the statues and pictures decorating the tall walls but even they seemed magical and almost alive because of the flickering motion of the candles. For a short moment his mind forgot his fear and replaced it with curiosity. That ended, however, when he felt Sephiroth tug at his hand and then kiss it. Everything he hated was contained in that action; the control, the molestation, the illusion of romanticism and normality. He hated that man, and he hated everything in this place. Pretty lights couldn't fix that.

He bit his lip as Sephiroth began walking him towards a table. This table was larger than the one they normally ate at and seemed to be made of a thick crystal which mirrored the different colors coming from the candles and lost its true form. Several silver dishes containing a number of different foods were arranged in an eye-pleasing and attractive manner on its surface with two more candles in the center. The looked like they were floating. The aroma coming from the different foods might have been mouth-watering if Cloud were not too sick with worry to appreciate it.

Sephiroth pulled out a chair for the boy, as he always did, before walking around and taking a seat himself. It was hard for his mind to comprehend the fact that this was actually real, that this night had finally come. When he first decided he was going to take the boy he had made up his mind that he would not sleep with him until his birthday. It had been hard, extremely hard. Having the boy with him, at his mercy, kissing him and touching him but always having to stop himself from going too far. It had been a challenge, and a credit to his control that he had not succumbed to his lesser urges, which a weaker man would have. But he loved Cloud, and he wanted to make his night romantic and something he would remember.

He reached for the glass to his left, holding it in the air and smiling at the nervous teen.

"To you, Cloud."

Cloud watched the other for a moment before he realised that Sephiroth was waiting for something. He looked to his left and saw a glass containing something there. Feeling uncomfortable at the attention, he picked up the glass and held it awkwardly. Sephiroth smiled and took a drink. Cloud brought his own glass to his mouth, sniffing it first. It was some sort of alcohol. He took a small sip, finding that the taste wasn't bad. He placed the glass back down on the table.

"Do you like it?" Sephiroth asked. Cloud licked bottom lip.

"You would let me drink alcohol?" He questioned instead. Sephiroth laughed under his breath.

"You already drink _alcohol_ Cloud." Cloud winced at the reminder of his invaded privacy.

"But most adults wouldn't encourage it." He didn't look up from his plate as he said that.

Sephiroth wasn't impressed with the referral to there age gap, but instead of becoming angry he just kept a neutral expression and replied.

"Perhaps, but I'm not most people, and I'll be here to mind you if you do get too drunk. It's not going to happen often anyway, and I will decide when and how much you are allowed."

Cloud felt frustration and indignity swell up within him, he wanted to shout at the other that he wasn't a child. But it would do him no good, what was the point in getting in trouble? He just cleared his throat and kept his gaze downward.

"Eat." Sephiroth instructed after a few seconds silence. Cloud nodded and began putting some food on his plate, not actually caring what it was. He was just glad to have something to do with his hands.

"I have a gift for you," Sephiroth began, scooping some onto his plate. Cloud looked at him, his fork held in mid air. He furrowed his brows.

Sephiroth laughed, leaning back in his seat.

"You didn't think I wouldn't get you something did you?" He drawled, cutting into a piece of meat on his plate. "Well, it's not surprising I suppose, none of those vermin you call 'loved ones' ever fussed about you did they."

"That's not true." Cloud felt his cheeks flush a bit. "Mom always celebrated my birthdays, and my friends But I never really cared. It's just another day..." He twirled his fork in his hand while he spoke, feeling childish as he always did.

"They would have you thinking that way," Sephiroth said with a sigh. "Anyway that's all in the past now and we wont discuss it further. As I was saying, I got you a present. Unfortunately the weather conditions here make walking or out door activities difficult, especially for someone like you."

Cloud heard the unspoken word. Someone _weak_ like you.

"But since you are going to be staying with me its not healthy for you to get no exercise so next week a thread-mill will be delivered here. I know how much you like to run so I thought you would be pleased with it."

Cloud honestly didn't know what to say. He wasn't expecting this. An exercise machine? It was so…normal. He thought perhaps he would be given jewelry, or a knife to the heart. It was hard to know.

The conversation was mostly one sided for the rest of the meal, Cloud focused on eating the food that he couldn't enjoy. He tried to be as slow as possible because he knew that Sephiroth had more planned than just dinner and it wasn't something he wanted to think about.

His stomach was in knots by the time they had both eaten their fill. Cloud swallowed the lump in his throat while he watched his captor get up from his seat and walk around to him.

"How are you feeling?" Sephiroth questioned in a sing-song voice. He knelt down and leaned his arm on the boy's legs.

"I-" the food felt like a lump of clay at the bottom of his stomach. "I'm tired." He hoped against all hope that he would be allowed to return to his room and just go to bed.

"Hmm," Sephiroth mumbled, standing up again. He knew what Cloud was trying to do, but it wouldn't work. The night was just beginning. He ruffled his charges hair before turning and walking across the room.

"I never considered music an important part of life," Sephiroth said idly as he removed a record from a worn-put cover. "But there are a few works that have caught my attention over the years. This, for example." He slipped the disc into place and then set it up. Within moments the room was filled with the soft hum of strings and notes.

Sephiroth walked back to Cloud and held out his hand.

Cloud's eyes widened as he grasped what the action meant.

"No, I-I don't dan-"

"Neither do I. But I think we should both make an exception hmm?" Sephiroth nodded his head.

"Please I-"

"Don't be rude Cloud."

Closing his eyes for a moment, Cloud chewed on his tongue and then took a breath. His hand rose slowly and was soon surrounded by the other's larger one. He let himself be pulled from the chair, as if he was merely a puppet on strings, and soon he felt the awful, familiar feeling of the mans arms around him.

Sephiroth pressed the warm body closer to his own, relishing in the feeling. Clouds body fit perfectly into his, as though they had been made for each other. He knew they had been. He pushed Cloud's reluctant head to lean on his chest and left his hand resting loosely on the boy's neck.

"Wrap your arms around me." He instructed in a harsh tone, satisfied when the boy slowly complied, his smaller hands curling around his broad back,

To be honest, Sephiroth was not entirely comfortable doing this. Dancing was not something he had ever practiced before. Why would he? His body was mechanic and his movements always swift and precise, so the slow drawling motions required for this activity didn't suit him. However, he wanted to try it with Cloud that night, just to see how it felt. It wasn't so bad, just for the simple fact that blond was pressed so close to his body.

"I love you." He whispered into the side of the boys head. He closed his eyes and let himself relax, just being there with his lover. He ignored the fact the body pressed against him was anything but relaxed, or that every time his lower arm rubbed along the boys spine, strong shudders followed in its wake.

He ignored it.

Cloud honestly thought he was going to pass out. This was all just too much. How had he gotten here? Kidnapped, held hostage by a madman who pretended to dote and shower affection on him when in the same breath he would do the most terrible things to him. How could he do this? How could he live through this? He was so tired. Tired of the fear, the uncertainty. It was too much. His stomach churned with every movement he was forced to make, with the way the other caressed him, kissed him, smelt him obsessively. He couldn't do this. He was going to die.

"Are you enjoying your birthday?" He heard Sephiroth whisper. Knowing that a response was in order, he cleared his tight throat and nodded his head against the man's shoulder. He heard the other breath contently, and he could imagine the self satisfied smile on his face. It made him so mad. Why didn't he do anything about it? Why didn't he try to fight or refuse the man? Was he such a coward that he would let all this happen to him without a word of protest?

"I knew you would." Sephiroth buried his fingers into the blond hair, stretching them out to caress the scalp. After a few minutes he applied light pressure and pulled Cloud's head back so he could look him in the eyes. They were dancing far more enthusiastically than his body was.

"Tonight is not over though, you know that?" He kept his eyes locked firmly with Cloud's and jerked him when he tried to look away.

"Please." Cloud whispered and Sephiroth felt like rolling his eyes. Always that same word.

"Please?" He mimicked, playing along.

"I don't want to…" Cloud's lower lip was trembling, he really did look terrified.

"You don't want to…?"

"You know." Cloud pulled back his hands from around him and then pressed them against his chest lightly pushing on Sephiroth's stomach. He looked so small then; like an innocent and helpless little child trying to protect himself from a monster. Something inside Sephiroth began to ache then, but he suppressed it; pushed it back into that dark hole inside of him. He wasn't doing anything wrong here. He loved Cloud, they needed to be together.

He sighed and squeezed the boy tight again.

"Don't be afraid love. I would never hurt you. I'll take care of you." He kissed the top of the boy's head and rocked him until the music came to its highest peak, and then simmered down to an ending. He felt something sting behind his eyes and at the same time his throat became tight. He breathed deeply, closing his eyes tightly and kissing the boy's hair with force.

The song ended, and like the sound that remained, Clouds mind became static. He couldn't think, he could barely breathe. He was just…there. Like a ghost in this strange world of red and green.

He was there when Sephiroth kissed him on the lips, he was there when he was led out of the room and back into the brightly lit hallway that blinded his eyes, he was there when for the very first time he was led up the stairs, he was there when he was led through a long, carpeted hallway and he was there when he was led through the door.

His body was there. But his mind wasn't.

He realized that when he stepped into the room; a large expensively furnished room clouded in shadows, and like a gust of wind his senses returned to him, startling him out of his trance.

No, n-no. No. He couldn't be here. He couldn't be in this room. This was a bad place. It was a dangerous place that wanted to hurt him, to ruin him. He couldn't be here.

He heard his heart pound in his ears and felt a cold sweat break out on his back. With a quick movement he jerked his hand from his captor's grasp and began moving backwards. Sephiroth turned with eyes wide in something like irritated surprise as he watched him move back. But he didn't care. What could the man do to him that would be worse than this? He would take anything else. Materia, knives, guns… nothing was more terrifying than what was going to happen in this room.

His legs felt heavy as he moved himself backwards, not daring to turn his back on a trained killer. Those cat-like eyes narrowed at him but he didn't care; he was almost out the door. The threshold was beneath his toes.

He made to turn and run but had barely taken three steps in the hallway before his arm was caught and he was forced back into the room and shoved forward with irresistible force. He lost his footing and fell onto the hard ground, biting his bottom lip in the process. He caught himself before his face hit the floor and stayed there, braced on his hands and knees as the door was closed and locked.

Sephiroth placed the key on top of the doorframe; knowing Cloud wouldn't be able to reach it and then turning to regard the teen sprawled pitifully on the ground. He walked around to face him and narrowed his eyes when he saw the blood dripping down his chin. That angered him. He wanted Cloud to be perfect tonight. Now he was marred.

"Foolish boy." He hissed as he knelt down. Cloud got up on his knees, one hand timidly pressed against his bleeding lip.

"I don't want to be here." Cloud said in a pleading voice. Sephiroth smiled.

"Don't be afraid."

Cloud closed his eyes and sighed miserably.

"Please..." He whispered.

Sephiroth licked at his top teeth and stared at the unhappy youth intensely. After about two minutes he crawled forward and caught Cloud's hand, pulling it away from his face. The wound wasn't bleeding heavily, but there was quite a large split on his lip and the rest of the blood was smudged across his chin. He fingered the cut lightly, pulling back when Cloud hissed.

Sephiroth sighed and got to his feet gracefully again. He used the hand he still held to pull Cloud up with him.

Cloud didn't know what to do. He just felt hopeless. Empty. He wasn't going to get out of this. He was going to be…raped. What was the point in even fighting it anymore? He just couldn't fight Sephiroth.

"Don't look so sad Cloud. It's not like I'm going to beat you." Sephiroth rubbed up and down Clouds' arm in what he thought to be a comforting manner.

"I'm not ready." Cloud felt pathetic saying such a girly thing but he couldn't help it, it was what he felt. He wasn't ready for sex. He would never be ready for sex with Sephiroth. It was too horrible to imagine. And it was happening now.

"You just frightened, and I understand. It's my job as your lover to help you through this." Sephiroth slowly circled the boy and when he was behind him he wrapped an arm around his waist, pulling him flush against him as he so often did. But now it felt different and he had to try extremely hard to suppress a gasp as his erection was stimulated by the relatively meager contact. "I'll show you how your body can feel, which parts give the most pleasure."

Cloud felt himself being pushed forward a few feet until they were standing in front ofthe large bay window. It was dark in the room, Sephiroth having left the light off, so Cloud could see the landscape perfectly clearly. It was beautiful, exactly like a fairytale winter wonderland with snow, trees and stars stretched for miles and miles. It made him all the more depressed though, because he would never be a part of it. He was trapped here; from now on he was merely an observer to the outside world.

"I love you."

That sentence. That disgusting, false, ingrained sentence. He hated it, hated hearing it come from that evil mouth. It was hypocrisy of the highest order. A monster in love?

"Don't say that." He said in a monotone voice, his eyes never leaving the snowy scene.

"I'll never stop saying it." Sephiroth answered lightly, his fingers running along the zip of Cloud's open jacket.

"It doesn't mean anything."

"It means everything."

"Not to me." Cloud shifted a bit, feeling uncomfortable when Sephiroth started to pull the jacket over his shoulder. His pulled his arms forward in an attempt to prevent the actions.

"Don't push me Cloud, you remember the punishment for disobedience." Sephiroth placed a kiss on his earlobe when he finished talking.

"What could be worse than rap-"

Clouds words cut off abruptly and were replaced by a grunting sound when a large palm closed around his throat. He held his breath and kept still, his heart literally trying to jump out of his chest.

"Don't you dare say that _word_."

Cloud wanted to tell the man how ridiculous he was and how hypocritical his words were. But he couldn't, he wasn't brave enough. Like a coward, all he did was remain quiet.

"Hmmm. Say you're sorry." Sephiroth sighed, his anger seemingly gone. Cloud swallowed loudly.

"Cloud." The warning in his tone was clear. The teen felt tears sting his eyes so he closed them.

"Now."

"…"

Twitch of the hand against his jugular.

"S-orry." He bit out.

Sephiroth's hand immediately loosened but stayed in place.

"Don't taint what we are about to do like that Cloud. There's nothing wrong with what we're doing. We are going to be one tonight. I'm going to show you how much I love you." Sephiroth sounded genuine, which depressed Cloud all the more. This man really believed he wasn't doing anything wrong. He wouldn't be convinced otherwise. It was hopeless.

Sephiroth brought his mouth down from the boy's ear to his neck. He opened his lips and then sucked the skin directly over the boy's pulse, leaving a small red mark there once he was done. The skin tasted delicious, salty and pure, but one taste wasn't enough so he continued his ministrations, ignoring the way the receiver squirmed.

As his mouth worked on the pale neck his hands were busy pulling the jacket from Cloud's shoulders. The boy struggled and tightened his arms but eventually Sephiroth got it off and threw it to the floor before wrapping his arms back around the blonde's waist.

Cloud tried to place himself somewhere else; he wanted to get as far away from reality as possible. But it wouldn't work, the feeling of the others tongue against his skin, his teeth, the sucking, it was sickening and so much more intimate than anything he had done before.

Sephiroth entire groin pulsed against the leather and he fought to remain calm as he ran his tongue along the area behind Cloud's ear, pushing the boy's head further to the side.

Clouds neck and shoulder ached from the position, his eyes staring blankly out the window. White snow. White snow.

Eventually Sephiroth pulled away and took a minute to catch his breath. He spun the boy to face him, grasping his upper arms so he couldn't turn away. Cloud's breathing was fast and even in the dim light it was clear that his face had turned deathly white. White skin. White skin.

"Cloud." The boy brought his hesitant eyes up towards him; they were glistening with unshed tears. Sephiroth pursed his lips. The boy really was terrified of doing this. Such a virgin.

"I'm not going to hurt you." He said seriously, shaking the boy lightly for emphasis.

"Please don't do this to me." Cloud was so desperate Sephiroth was sure that if he were a weaker man he would have given into those big eyes.

He didn't say anything else, instead he grasped both of the small hands in his and started walking backwards.

Towards the bed.

The fear flared up again and the blond began to struggle, trying to pull his arms free.

"Sephiroth please. I'm not even asking to be let go. I just want to go back to my room. T-the one you gave me. Please Sephiroth. I can't do this. Not now." He dug his feet into the floor to halt their progress.

The General found Cloud's attempts at bargaining endearing; tying to suck up to him and flattering him. He was a clever boy; he knew what he was doing. But Sephiroth was not so gullible.

He continued to pull the boy with ease and once they reached the bed Sephiroth switched positions so the back of Cloud's knees were touching the large mattress. He then went to push the boy down but Cloud quickly caught his shoulders.

"No, Sephiroth please. Please, please, please. I d-don't want to." It was becoming hard to catch his breath and he dug his fingers into the tall man's coat. Sephiroth tried to push him again but he fought to remain standing by clutching to the thick leather with the tenacity of ivy.

The silver haired man was actually enjoying the feeling of being held so tightly, but he didn't have the patience to let it last too long. He pried the boy's small fingers from his coat and then pushed him down to sit on the bed and as caught himself, Sephiroth ruffled his hair and then sat down beside him.

Cloud clasped his hands in together and fiddled his fingers in front of him. His breathing was slightly labored and he was trying to calm it. It didn't help that Sephiroth was stroking the side of his face. He tried to get to his feet but Sephiroth stopped him with an arm across his chest.

"I really do love you." Sephiroth whispered, leaning in closer to him. Cloud shifted away but couldn't really get far.

"Are you ready?" Sephiroth whispered. Cloud took a breath and shook his head. "It's okay. We will go slow."

"I don't want to."

"I know." Sephiroth moved his hand to Cloud's chest and then, to the teen's absolute horror, began fiddling with the front of his T-shirt. He brought his hands up to push the invading fingers away, moving back on the bed. This annoyed Sephiroth who growled lowly and grabbed him by the collar, pulling him forward. He heard the fabric protest.

"Stop." Cloud shouted, twisting his body away. His captor kept his hold.

"Don't touch me." He screamed, his emotions getting the better of him. Sephiroth's gaze snapped up to him and he narrowed his eyes.

"Calm down." He ordered. The blond shook his head and tried to move back more but Sephiroth was faster and within minutes he was on his back, his kidnapper straddling his hips. He hated this familiar position, and stared up at the man with unrestrained terror.

"Get off me." His voice cracked. Sephiroth leaned down and kissed him.

"I love you." He said again.

"Stop."

"No."

Cloud tried to bring his legs up to kick at the man but Sephiroth easily held them down with his own. Both of Cloud's hands were held above his head by one of Sephiroth while the man looked down on him.

"Why are you doing this to me?" Cloud let out a long breath and let his body sink into the mattress. "I've never done anything to you."

"I'm not doing this to punish you Cloud."

"But you know that I don't want to. You're not supposed to force someone."

"You don't know what you want Cloud. You just don't understand yet."

"I-"

"Hush."

Cloud grunted when he was suddenly pulled into a sitting position again. Sephiroth studied him for a second and then brought his eyes down towards the T-shirt. Clouds eyes widened.

"No."

What followed was around five minutes of struggling and screaming as Sephiroth worked the T-shirt off Cloud's body. Cloud tried his hardest to stop him but in the end the slightly ripped article lay on the floor and Cloud was left with his torso exposed.

Sephiroth's body came to a complete stop at that moment. It was as though all of his vital organs had shut down and the only thing keeping him breathing was the absolute euphoria running through his veins. He had seen it so many times, both in reality and in his dreams, but it was nothing compared to how it looked now. Cloud's body was so pale and just… flawless. His skin was as white as the snow outside the window, but it wasn't cold. For the first time, Sephiroth could touch the bare skin and feel the warmth, the breath. His eyes ran over the flat, lithely muscled stomach, then up towards his chest. His cock twitched strongly and he was sure it was leaking pre-cum when he caught sight of the boy's pink, pert nipples, already hardened from the cool air. His mouth watered in craving; he wanted to taste them, he wanted to suck on them and make them hard and sensitive. Cloud would love it, even if he pretended not to.

He looked up towards Cloud's face to see his eyes shut and his mouth moving softly to control his breathing. The boy's attempts at psychological escape irritated him.

"Cloud." He said, hooking his arms around the boy's back and pulling him tighter against him.

Cloud really felt unwell. He couldn't believe this was real, his body was hypersensitive to everything the other did and the feeling of his chest brushing against Sephiroth semi-exposed one sent shockwaves down his spine. Sephiroth released his arms and he wrapped them around himself self-consciously. It was ridiculous but he felt so miserable and puny compared to the man and he wasn't comfortable showing his body to him. It was something he had never really been comfortable with since he was a child and bullies had teased him that he looked like a girl.

The General saw Cloud's attempts at modesty and it made him smile fondly. Cloud was so humble and modest, even though he should be more than proud of himself. He blamed the lack of confidence on the people in the boy's old life, not one had bothered to tell the teen how beautiful he was, how precious he was. He raised a gloved hand to the blonds chin, wiping away the blood from his cut. Cloud curled in on himself further.

"Don't do that." He whispered. "You should be proud of yourself, you have a beautiful body. It's perfect." Cloud just swallowed loudly and shook his head, tightening his arms. Feeling possessive, Sephiroth circled his own arms around the teen and pressed him close to him.

"Don't be scared." He whispered. Cloud sighed and leaned against him in defeat. After a couple of peaceful moment Sephiroth moved, not letting go of the boy. He shifted until Cloud was sitting at the top of the bed, his lower back resting on the pillow.

Cloud was so tired he almost fell forward when his captor suddenly moved away from him and left him holding himself up. His heart thrummed in his chest as he watched the other get up and off of the bed.

Cloud looked on quietly as Sephiroth moved over to a dresser and opened a drawer, he couldn't see what he was doing as the large back blocked the view but he knew it wasn't anything good. He couldn't help but sneak a glance at the door.

Sephiroth walked back to him and put the items he was carrying down on the locker beside the bed. He looked at his boy who was staring at the items with big, wide eyes.

Cloud gasped, eyes running over the two leather straps and a jar of something he couldn't make out.

"You have a choice here Cloud." Sephiroth said as he reached out to finger one of the leather straps. "You can comply with everything I say, and listen to me as we make love. Or I can tie you up and take you as I wish."

Cloud sighed and fisted a hand in his hair. He shook his head and brought his knees up towards his chest. What kind of choice was that, to be raped or to be raped?

Sephiroth stared at the boy for a few minutes before his patience ran out. He was in pain at this point.

"Make the choice." He ordered.

"There is no choice." Was Cloud's muffled response. Sephiroth was too worked up to deal with this now, and the sight of Cloud in only his jeans wasn't helping. He picked up the bindings.

"Alright I'll choose for you then." He said lightly and waked towards the teen. Cloud's head shot up and his eyes focused on the straps.

"Oh, no. No please don't. I don't want to be tied up."

"Then you'll do as I ask?" Sephiroth raised a brow and held the straps up with the same menace as he held the Masamune. It was dangerous; it could kill him.

"I can't." Cloud moaned in misery.

"Well then." Placing a knee on the mattress, Sephiroth went to grab his hand but it was moved away.

"Don't." Cloud said briskly.

"I'm becoming impatient Cloud." He warned in a low tone. Cloud's eyes moved around the room and Sephiroth knew he was trying to think of a solution.

Cloud couldn't believe what was about to happen, he didn't think he would survive it, but to be tied up while it happened. To have no defense whatsoever? He couldn't do that. He couldn't comply either. Gaia, what could he do?

"I-I'll try." He stuttered over the words, knowing that they weren't right to say. Sephiroth seemed satisfied.

"Good boy." He put the straps back down and then kneeled up fully on the bed.

"I think we've dallied long enough, don't you?" He drawled as he leaned down towards the boy's face. He gave a soft smile before leaning down and claiming those lips. Cloud was good and allowed his mouth to be invaded, he was used to this; this he could handle.

It was when Sephiroth's attention started to drift downwards that the panicky feeling started to flare again. The huge man positioned himself more absolutely on top of the teen and trailed kissed down his chin, along his jawbone and then his neck. Cloud had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep himself quiet.

Sephiroth was enjoying the taste of the boy; he kissed the skin of his neck softly, his tongue snaking out to lick along the small Adams apple which made the boy tense. Then, to his own excitement he moved on to the exposed, hairless chest.

Cloud placed a hand over his eyes, not liking the new sensations he was receiving. Sephiroth's mouth was hot and wet against his skin, his hair falling around his face and tickling Cloud's chest and sides as it moved. He wanted to push the head away, to kick and hit and curl up but it was impossible, and it would do no good. He was trapped.

He gasped suddenly.

Sephiroth let out a long moan when his lips finally found the boys left nipple and closed around it. Cloud's body jolted underneath him, his knees brushing against his erection for a second. He hissed and began to suck on the nub, feeling it become hard in his mouth. He felt the chest beneath him heave, he heard the little gasps. He was doing this to Cloud. He was making him feel these things, no one else. He was introducing Cloud to the world of carnal pleasure. This was only the start too; they had years ahead of them to explore their sexuality together.

His forehead matted with sweat as he really started to get into the act, sucking on the bud until it was red and swollen. The sight was so erotic that if his stamina had not been up to par he would have finished right there. Fortunately he was of stronger will and could…endure Cloud.

The blond gasped when he felt the man move to his other nipple. The sensations were unpleasant, the cold air was biting his abandoned areole and Sephiroth was sucking the other so hard it was hurting him. Still, he strangely felt his groin area become stiff, not hard but just…awake. How could that be happening? What was wrong with him? He bit his lip when he felt the man's teeth tug with the sensitive flesh.

"Don't." He hissed. Sephiroth removed his mouth and then looked up at his him. He looked like a beast; his vivid eyes were burning brighter that normal and his breathing was loud and deep. His hair fell around his head, curtaining his face sinisterly.

He was a monster.

"You are enjoying it." Sephiroth smirked, moving upwards and kissing his lips again. Cloud jerked away shook his head.

"I'm not."

Sephiroth tilted his head, moving some hair out of Cloud's eyes and taking in the beauty of his boy at that moment. He looked so crestfallen, his glossy eyes shining with sadness and his pretty lips tilted downwards, all framed by his yellow hair. He was so gorgeous, so perfect. What man wouldn't want to fuck him?

"You will." He kissed the boys soft cheek and then went back down to his torso again. He trailed kisses down the boys sternum and then onto his stomach. His belly-button was quite large and Sephiroth couldn't resist sticking his tongue into it. When he did this Cloud's hips started to buck and he had to clamp his hands on the boy's sides to hold him steady.

Sephiroth found it very endearing that Clouds stomach wasn't completely toned but was soft and smooth, unlike his own which was rock solid. He kissed his way down until he was met with material instead of skin. The waistband of Clouds pants. He licked his bottom lip and glanced up at the boy, who still had his eyes shut. He brought up both his hands and placed his fingers on the material.

Immediately Cloud jerked upright, leaning on his elbows. He moved himself upwards on the bed and stared at Sephiroth in abject horror.

"Isn't this enough?" He asked. Sephiroth tilted his head in question; his eyes were quite serious though.

Cloud wiped the sweat from his forehead and took a breath. "I thought maybe we could stop here tonight, go…slowly."

"It wouldn't work." Sephiroth replied, his voice low and throaty. "You would never be ready." He placed his hand on Clouds knee and stared into his eyes.

"Then why are you forcing me."

"I am NOT forcing you." Cloud's words got caught in his throat at the volume of the man's voice. He pursed his lips and kept silent.

"This has to happen Cloud. It will complete us." In an instant Sephiroth was calm and smooth again, rubbing his leg through the light pants.

"Lie down." He instructed coolly.

Cloud felt his breath quicken, his heart beat sped up and he his skin became clammy, but he tried to bite back the fear, to stand up for once in his life.

"No." He muttered, swallowing instantly afterwards. To his dismay Sephiroth only smiled.

"No?" He mimicked. Cloud's chin shook as he nodded. The older man chuckled.

"Lie down. Cloud." Again Cloud refused so Sephiroth pushed back his hair and snarled.

"As you wish."

Cloud yelped when he was suddenly tackled onto his back. He struggled and screamed as Sephiroth caught both of his arms and pulled then up over his head, keeping them there with one hand while he sought with the other.

"No. No. Stop. No. Ngggh." Cloud screamed, trying to kick at the man. His feet were trapped under the other's unbelievable weight so he only succeeded in wriggling like a worm on the bed. Helpless and pathetic. Tears began to sting his eyes.

"Stop." He shouted, jerking his shoulders. "I said stop!"

Sephiroth paid him no heed as he got the two straps in his grip and, like that first day he had his boy with him, he secured the boys arms to opposite sides of the marble headboard.

There was a moment of calm, as the two set of lungs worked double-time to reimburse the bodies with oxygen.

Once he had caught his breath, Sephiroth kneeled up and looked down at the boy. He looked the same as he had all those weeks ago, terrified, sad and confused, searching him for an ounce of mercy.

"Sephiroth." Cloud started, tears rolling down his cheeks,"please don't do this to me."

"Shhhh," Sephiroth clicked his tongue and began to work on the top button of Cloud's pants, his own thighs keeping the blonds legs still.

"No. Gaia please…" Cloud shook his head, pushing it back into the pillow and letting out a moaning sound. He couldn't believe this was happening. How could he stop this? Wasn't this the part where the police barged in and saved him? Who was going to save him? He had to be saved. This couldn't happen. This couldn't happen.

But it was happening, and the soft click of a button opening confirmed it.

Sephiroth took a breath, not believing this time had finally come. It wasn't a dream. It had better not be a dream. No, it wasn't a dream, it was so much more.

Taking a breath, he hooked his fingers under both the waistband of the jeans and boxers and pulled them down his legs

He heard Cloud's choked gasp as he discarded the last article of Cloud's modesty. He turned back towards the figure on the bed.

Clouds face was bright red with humiliation; he crossed his legs together and folded them slightly in a weak attempt to cover himself. It didn't work though, because Sephiroth could still see more than enough of that perfect body. He moved forward and pushed Cloud's knees down with his hand and then lowered his eyes, aware that he was humiliating the boy. Cloud would have to get over that. Genitals were genitals, they were all the same really and there was no need to be embarrassed. Cloud wasn't very big, but he wasn't small and he hadn't finished growing. Sephiroth found the light blond curls dusting the blond's member very attractive.

Cloud was mortified. Humiliated. This was the worst thing that could ever happen to him. Tied naked to a bed with a man. No, not a man, Sephiroth; the General of the Shinra mansion was about to rape him. He wanted to die. Yes, he just wished he could die and go to the lifestream. Somewhere he wouldn't have to feel like this anymore. He just wanted to stop being scared all the time. He let out a soft sob.

"There's no reason to cry Cloud." Sephiroth stroked Cloud's cheek, smiling at him 'kindly'. Cloud shook his head.

"Look at how beautiful you are, love. You're perfect. Don't be ashamed." The silver haired man placed a hand on Cloud's thigh, a few inches from his groin area. Cloud tried to kick his leg but it was useless. He jerked his hands and sobbed.

"I can't do this." He moaned.

"You can. I'll help you." Sephiroth moved forward and braced himself on his arms, his clothed form shadowing the boy's lower body beneath him completely. His hair fell around his head and brushed Cloud's thighs, one strand following the curve of his hip. As he did this he was also slowly pulling the leather gloves from his fingers.

Cloud bit his tongue, looking towards the ceiling with blurry eyes. He was humiliated, hyper aware of his body at that moment. He couldn't stand the feeling of the mans face so close to that part of his body, it made him feel more self conscious than he ever had before. Was he clean? Did he look strange? Did he smell bad? It was weird to think of things like that at that moment but he couldn't help it.

Sephiroth then slithered upwards until his face was directly above Cloud's and his hair fell around them both like a curtain so all Cloud could see was his glowing eyes. He was so focused on them, in fact, that he nearly jumped out of his skin when he felt the man's fingers brush against his member.

"Don't..." Cloud pulled his wrists so hard he was sure they had to be bleeding. He bucked his hips and tried to kick at his tormenter.

"Shhhh." Sephiroth gave him a sinister smile as his bare fingers circled his limp flesh. Cloud shifted his hips but Sephiroth kept his light grip.

"S-Stop it." Clouds breath hitched again when the fingers began to move in short motions. This was the first sexual touch he had ever received from another and it was horrible. He hated that the fingers belonged to someone who had done such horrible things to him, who had kidnapped him, taken him away from everyone he loved and hurt him in so many ways.

He felt the fingers settle more on his skin and he tried to ignore it. He could feel himself loosing control of his emotions, his eyes were spilling water and his body was shaking. He bit back a sob when Sephiroth lifted his sex upwards.

Sephiroth found himself more nervous than he expected now that the time was actually here, he was about to give his boy his first taste of sexual pleasure and so he had to make it amazing. He took a breath and secured his hand more firmly around the flaccid organ. Cloud, like most Midgar boys, was circumcised, this meant stimulation would be easier. He heard Cloud choke back a sob but ignored it. He was crying for no reason.

He extended his middle finger until it rested just below the head of the boy's cock, directly over the little bundle of nerves residing there. He began moving his finger in quick motions over the spot, running his other hand up and down the quivering thigh. All through this his eyes remained on the boy's face, studying every expression and sound.

Cloud gasped at the strange feeling he was receiving, his skin broke out in goose bumps and the fact that he couldn't even bring his arms down was making him feel extremely uncomfortable.

"Can- can you untie my hands?" He grunted, jumping at a strange shock that pulsed through his lower body.

"I gave you that chance already." Sephiroth answered calmly, his attention focused on his ministrations.

Cloud threw his head back and tried to purse his lips to keep from crying out.

By now Sephiroth was becoming more confident in his movements. He continued stroking the spot beneath the head of the boy's shaft and now placed his other hand underneath the boy testicles, stopping to feel them for a second which made Cloud hiss loudly, and then pressing into the skin underneath them. Cloud's back arched, making him smile contently. Why had he been nervous? The inexperienced body had no chance against him.

He fondled the boy for another few minutes, stroking and pressing in all the spots he knew would bring the most pleasure. Eventually Cloud's member became semi-erect and Sephiroth was ready to move on to the next part.

He kept one hand stroking up and down Cloud's sex and moved back so he could get a better view of his face. The teen was hyperventilating now, his eyes red and puffy and his face flushed. He wiped the boy's cheek, tracing his thumb under his eye.

"Don't cry Cloud." Cloud opened his eyes, blinking a few times in order to clear them. He jaw twitched when Sephiroth squeezed him again. He could feel himself becoming hard, it was different than any time he had masturbated though; more intense, almost painful. But there was pleasure aswell. He was confused.

"Can w-e stop now Sephiroth?" He looked at the man imploringly, trying to convey all his horror and fear into his eyes. Sephiroth's green eyes shone in the dark room, but there was no mercy in them.

Sephiroth tutted and kissed the boy on his nose, smiling at the way Cloud scrunched his face up.

"Your body likes this, see. You're excited. I'll make you feel even better, love." One quick kiss to the lips and Sephiroth's hand started moving again, faster this time. His left hand smoothed its way up his torso, stopping over his nipples to tweak them, and running down until it was grasping his hip yet again.

"No." Cloud inhaled deeply, his back arching off the bed. He tried again to kick his legs but they were still being held down.

"You are enjoying this Cloud." Sephiroth's voice was breathy and his mouth lay open, imitating every breath Cloud took.

"STOP."

"Hush, good boy. That's good." Cloud was completely hard by now and Sephiroth's fingers were working relentlessly on him. Making him jump and hiss and arch. Every movement was watched by his captor.

"That's it. Good." Sephiroth coaxed the boy, running his fingers along his jawbone.

Cloud was finding it hard to breath; his body was overwhelmed with sensations. He couldn't believe what Sephiroth was doing, he was making him…it was disgusting. Why was he reacting? For Gaia's sake was he that weak? He didn't want it but his sex was harder than it had ever been before, it was tingling and he could feel every movement of the others fingers on it. He let out a moan, trying weakly to kick his legs. His face was hot and sweat was pooling under him.

"Keep going." Sephiroth instructed, tightening his grip.

"Nngh." Cloud groaned and tried to stop his body moving.

"Are you getting close?" Sephiroth rose a silver brow at him.

"N-no."

"Liar."

"Stop it."

"You don't want me to stop Cloud. Not when you're so close."

"Gaia…"

Clouds body wasn't able to control the new sensations. When Sephiroth felt Clouds hips buck and his penis twitch within his fingers, he drew his fingers upwards and then squeezed the root of his organ

Cloud didn't know much about sex, but he knew what was happening and tried desperately to hold his orgasm back. His whole body tensed and he shut his eyes tightly, clenching his teeth and fingers. He couldn't do this. He couldn't get pleasure from this.

One strategic movement of Sephiroth's hand on his perineum destroyed him and with a groan he let himself release.

Cloud fell back against the mattress, sweating profusely and trying to regain his breath between heavy sobs. It took a few minutes for his daze to clear and when it did it all hit him like a bolt of lightening. Had he just…in Sephiroth's hands. How had he let that happen? How could he be so disgusting as to find pleasure in anything this man did?

Sephiroth lifted his hand to study the white milky substance splashed across his fingers. He brought it to his nose and inhaled, talking pleasure in what he had just done. He could make Cloud feel pleasure, the boy practically melted to his touch. He wiped his hand on the boy's stomach after a moment and then moved to lie beside him.

Cloud felt him move beside him and turned his face away, sniffing heavily as his chest heaved.

Sephiroth looked at the Cloud who appeared to be in quite a state. He leaned on one arm and used the other to wipe the hair from Clouds' forehead, which was heavy and damp with sweat. His skin was burning.

"How was that?" He whispered, lying down on the pillow and pressing their faces close together. Cloud inhaled but remained silent. "It is overwhelming I know." He muttered, reaching up and fiddling with the bound fingers.

"Before we move on to the next part, I'm going to offer you the chance to be untied. I don't want to tie you up Cloud. So if you promise to behave, I'll unbind you. Will you promise to behave?"

Cloud let out a whimpering sound, shaking his head.

"I can't do anymore. Please don't do any more." He cried.

"It's almost over now love. Just one more thing to do." Sephiroth felt that antagonizing the teen any longer would be unfair, so he sat up and began un-strapping Cloud's arms and inspecting his wrists. He hadn't promised anything but he deserved some lenience.

Having his hands released was a great relief to the blond. He wrapped one around his waist and used the other to rub his eyes. He really felt strange, like his body hadn't comprehended what happened to him yet. He just felt numb and empty, and maybe that was for the better.

There was a scraping sound and he looked to his left to see Sephiroth picking up the jar he had brought over earlier and opening it. His heart started beating fast again as fear quickly overtook him. He had an idea what was about to happen.

"No. Sephiroth please don't do this now." His voice was smaller than he would have liked but he didn't have the energy to put any force into it.

Sephiroth ignored the pleas and placed the jar of lubricant back on the locker, open and ready. He moved to stand beside the bed, then, watching the big blue eyes widen to their limit, he began undoing the leather clasps of his coat.

Cloud felt bile rise in his throat as he watched the man reveal his huge, muscled torso. He would have felt overwhelming jealousy at the sight if it were any other situation. Now though, it only intimidated him more, because that strength could and was being used against him. His fear increased tenfold when he saw the other begin to unzip his pants. He looked away, his cheeks turning a deep red. He had never seen another man naked before, at least not in real life. Reno _had_ made him watch a few disturbing video clips at different times.

His thoughts were interrupted when Sephiroth walked closer to him, fully nude and not a bit ashamed.

Sephiroth found it adorable that the boy was afraid to look at him. He was so innocent that even looking at another scared him? He was truly an angel. He wanted the boy to look at him however; he was proud of his body and wanted to share it with Cloud.

"Look at me." He instructed softly. Cloud tensed but didn't move. "Now." He said in a dangerous tone.

Cloud bristled and then brought his teary eyes towards the man, trying to look up towards his face as much as possible, but when his eyes caught sight of the massive organ hanging between the mans strong thighs, they refused to move. Sephiroth was big. Cloud didn't know much about it really but he knew this man was above average, at least nine inches in its erect state, and thick. Strange feelings of insecurity and embarrassment passed his mind before a much more horrible realization dawned on him.

"Sephiroth…I cant…" He backed up on the bed as the smirking demon approached him and leaned forward with a knee on the mattress.

"Don't be afraid Cloud. The pleasure outweighs the pain." Sephiroth dug his fingers into the boy's hair and pulled his head back, watching as he started crying heavily.

Clouds whole body broke out in goose bumps at the contact of the bare skin against his. It was just so raw and intimate; it was making him feel sick to his stomach. He tried to shift away but the man was like a leach and stayed pressed against him, some his hair falling on his shoulder like a silk snake.

Sephiroth was at the end of his limit and decided that there had been enough foreplay. He straddled the boy again, pushing him down against the pillow and once he was securely on top of him he reached for the jar on the locker. Cloud continued to cry, struggling and pushing against him. He ignored him and dipped two of his fingers into the transparent liquid.

Cloud watched through watery frames, his mind having a hard time working out what was happening. He felt sick and cold and dizzy and could do nothing but cry miserably as the man put down the jar and looked at him intensely. He shifted his legs but froze when they brushed off the man's lower body.

"This is the most painful part." Sephiroth explained, moving his body slightly. He placed his clean hand under Cloud's left leg and lifted it up to bend at the knee. Cloud immediately began to fight this, twisting and kicking harshly, but Sephiroth merely used brute strength to hold the boy in place. He grasped both of Clouds hands in one of his and held his leg down with his own, loving how every movement made their bare skin touch.

"Get off me." Cloud cried desperately, struggling his hardest now. His frustration began to rise when he found himself being easily contained. He stood no chance against the General of the Shinra army.

"Cloud." Sephiroth said. The blond shook his head, trying to pull back his hands. "Cloud," was said again, more firmly.

"No." He bit out, his eyes were shut as he continued to try to twist away.

"I'll tie you up again." Sephiroth threatened. The threat shook Cloud but he refused to give in. He had to fight, he had to-

"Ow." The blond yelped when he felt the Generals long fingers dig into his thigh, pressing into the bone. He clenched his teeth together and tried to wait out the pain. It didn't work though because the man just applied more pressure until he couldn't take it.

" Stop…Stop." He hissed, his struggles dimming down. Sephiroth immediately reduced pressure but kept his hand in place.

Once he saw that Cloud had given up, Sephiroth laid down fully on top of him, letting go of his arms. He had managed to keep the two lubricated fingers from rubbing against anything during the little struggle and they were now moving downward slowly.

"I love you." He breathed, leaning down to kiss the boy softly and deeply. Cloud was crying into the kiss but he didn't mind, he didn't mind anything when he was kissing Cloud. He moved his face up so that their noses were touching, smiling at the terrified teen. "Don't cry, Cloud." He cooed before running his tongue up the boy's cheek. He began covering the wet face in small kisses, as he often did, stopping occasionally to give the unwilling mouth a long, passionate one.

While his mouth was busy lavishing attention on the boy, his fingers were moving slowly into position. Cloud was too distracted to notice that he had moved his leg up more and then out. Cloud did notice, however, when one of his chilled fingers positioned themselves outside his entrance.

"Ple-ase." Cloud moaned kicking uselessly; he stared up at the other through his tears. "Please don't Sephiroth."

"I have to prepare you love. This may feel uncomfortable first, but eventually you'll get used to it." With that he claimed the boy's lips as his finger pushed forward.

Cloud gasped, pulling away from the mans mouth and pressing his head back into the pillow. He could feel the digit make its way deeper into his body, brushing against his inner walls painfully. It was horrible, the feeling of violation that came with the act, he now understood the meaning of the word. Sephiroth was violating him, breaking into his very skin, taking what he wanted from it. He bit his lip to muffle his groan.

Cloud had tensed up so much it was difficult for Sephiroth to push his finger in all the way; he moved it slowly careful not to scrape the inner lining, until his entire finger was surrounded by the moist heat. His cock jerked, a glob of pre-cum spilling out of it and landing on Cloud's hipbone. It knew that in just moments it would be surrounded by that same heat. He would finally be inside Cloud Strife. It was a fantasy made gloriously real. Encouraged by the thought, he began moving his finger out of the boy again, electing another groan from the unhappy teen. He kissed the boys chin and then pushed his finger upwards again. Cloud's toes curled and his eyes were as wide as they could possibly be.

The silver-haired man kept himself busy kissing and suckling the teen's neck, while his finger was sawing in and out of the unwilling orifice. Cloud was letting out a number of different sounds; sobs, hiccups, gasps, moans and whimpers, and Sephiroth had a feeling he wasn't fully there anymore. He didn't seem to notice when he added the second finger.

The fingering continued for over ten minutes, Sephiroth sucking and playing with the boy's chest, paying particular attention to the rosy nipples which were apparently extremely sensitive judging by the way Cloud gasped and strained as they were touched. To his surprise, and delight, Clouds member had began to stiffen again, probably due to the stimulation to his prostate. Sephiroth would explore that more intricately at a later date, for now it was time to move on to the main event.

He made sure the boy's entrance was well lubricated, dipping his fingers a second time to be sure and also preparing himself, before he took them out and positioned himself more comfortably on top of the lithe body.

Cloud didn't know if he had been half asleep or just in a trance, but he was sorry it had to end when he felt something larger than a finger pressing at his entrance. With a gasp his tried to sit up and clench his legs together, but a hand on his chest held him tightly while another pushed his legs back apart.

"Please don't do this to me." He whispered useless, both hands grabbing at the one on his chest and trying with all their might to budge it. He became even more upset and flustered when he couldn't get the man to move at all, and in one last desperate attempt he threw his arm out, his uncut nails scraping the mans right cheek.

Everything was quite for a second and then he heard Sephiroth growl, the man grasped both of his arms and used his much larger legs to keep his apart. He leant down so his breath was hot against Clouds chin.

"Are you ready?" Sephiroth whispered. Cloud just continued to cry, his breathing shallow and erratic now.

"I love you Cloud Strife."

At last those words had meaning as he drove his hips forward, engulfing the head of his cock in that silky heat. He groaned lowly as the boys' inside gripped him harder than any ever before. It was magnificent. He eased himself in slowly after the first thrust, until all of his member was inside the boy and their hips were pressed togother. Cloud was screaming loudly, his head thrown back and his eyes closed tightly. He was in real pain, but Sephiroth couldn't bring himself to focus on that. His body was in total euphoria and every cell was tingling with the pleasure emanating from his groin. He was inside Cloud Strife, finally. The though heightened the pleasure ten-fold. He gave it a few minutes before he moved again, making the boy cry out loudly. He eased himself out slowly and then back forward. Picking up memento as he did. It was hard to control himself, he wanted to ravage the boy, drive in deep and harshly. But he loved Cloud too much to do that now.

For Cloud, the experience was very different to what Sephiroth was feeling. He was sure he was going to die; no one could live through this agony and survive. He felt like he was being stabbed, Sephiroth's member speared too deep and stretched his body to the point where he was sure it would tear. He tried to stop himself screaming but it was impossible when that first thrust literally forced it out of him. The pain was intense, it was like his insides were being burned alive, and as Sephiroth withdrew it was doubled, again when he drove forward for a second time. He stopped being able to differentiate the trusts, the whole of his lower body becoming one large mass of a thousand different sensations, all painful and all unrelenting. He couldn't catch his breath and found himself gasping and choking on his sobs. He tried to pull his hands over his face but Sephiroth had them pressed tightly against the pillow at either side of his head.

Sephiroth breaths were long and deep, synchronizing with his movements in and out of the boy. Wanting to feel even more of the teen, he leaned down and began kissing and sucking on his neck again, not realizing he was drawing blood with some of his bites. He heard Cloud's pained whimpers and gasps but they were only adding to the eroticism of the moment. He was inside Cloud, he was finally taking him and it was every bit as blissful as he'd imagined. The feeling was beyond anything he had ever strived to achieve. He didn't want it to end, how would he come down from such a high? Cloud's skin was perfect; soft, hot and damp. Very sexy. It was a new, hidden side to the teen.

"I love y-you." He breathed, claiming Cloud's lips and shoving his tongue deeper than he ever had before.

Cloud was crying heavily, his whole body in pain. His neck was stinging and the man kept biting it cruelly, forcing yelps and hiccups from his throat. After a quick kiss that made him gag, the man moved down and to his horror focused his attention on his nipples again, biting and pulling them much harder than before. It was painful, but nothing compared to the movements down below. His entrance had to be raw by now; every time the man moved within him it felt like sandpaper scraping against them.

"Sto-o-o-p" He groaned, pressing his head back into the white pillow beneath him. His entire body was saturated with sweat, sticking to the blankets annoyingly.

Sephiroth dug his teeth into the soft nub, sucking on the blood that flooded his mouth. He didn't comprehend that he was hurting the boy because his entire body was functioning from below his waist. His hair felt hot against his back and he shook his head to dislodge some of it. He felt his cock become tight and more sensitive, and not wanting to reach his peek so soon, he slowed his hip's movements, bracing himself on his arms and looking down at his boy.

Cloud had his eyes shut tightly, this annoyed him.

"Open your eyes." He growled. Cloud did as told after he jerked his hips painfully in emphasis. The puffy lids slid open to reveal big glossy orbs that shone and blinked in the dimness. He smiled at the boy, his movements excruciatingly slow at this point.

"It really hurts." The distraught boy whispered.

"It will get better eventually." He replied, his movements almost stopping. "I want you to do something for me." He whispered, leaning down to kiss the damp forehead. Cloud eyes fluttered, the only sigh that he had heard him.

"Move your legs, and wrap them around me." He instructed; the mere words making his something clench deep inside him.

Cloud looked at him in disbelief; was he serious? Was it not enough that he was doing this to him?

"I can't." He cried. "It's too sore."

"You can and will." Sephiroth replied evenly, his sex enjoying the trembling of its host's body.

"Please. Please just leave me alone." He begged, shaking his head back and forth and tugging at his hands.

"I'm not going to move until you do it Cloud." Cloud didn't know what to do. He couldn't comply; the pain would kill him, but he couldn't stand the feeling of the other inside him for much longer. He knew Sephiroth didn't make idle threats. He had no choice.

"Ow." He whimpered as he moved his legs upwards. He dropped them after a second, the pain overwhelming him. "I c- can't. Please."

"Come on. You can do it." Sephiroth encouraged. Cloud huffed, knowing he wasn't going to receive any mercy. He took a breath and tried again.

The pain almost made him pass out, but eventually he got both his legs up and resting on the back of Sephiroth's thighs, lying back on the bed in exhaustion.

Sephiroth didn't wait a second longer before resumed his pace. He moved one of his hands to hold Clouds leg up, finding he was able to penetrate even deeper and easier now. Cloud's hands were free now and he pulled one over his eyes and was crying into it. He allowed it, as a reward for complying with his demand. His mind stopped working after that and he let his body be consumed by the pleasure again.

Several long minutes passed, filled with groans and whimpers and moans and sighs, until finally Sephiroth felt himself approaching orgasm once more. This time he'd allow it.

"Say you love me." He bit out between thrusts. Cloud grit his teeth as the thrusts became more urgent, not really hearing the demand.

"Say you love me." Sephiroth shouted breathily. Cloud widened his eyes.

"…"

"SAY IT." His voice reverberated off the walls.

Cloud felt dizzy and light headed; he barely knew what was being asked of him. But like he wasn't controlling it, he felt his mouth form the words.

"S-Sephiroth I love you."

A mighty groan followed and Cloud felt the uncomfortable feeling of something hot and liquid erupting inside of him. He didn't have time to think on it though, as his vision became spotty and white, blackness started engulf him and his breathing became shallow and short.

Sephiroth rested his body on top of the boy's, breathing heavily as he came down from his high. He pushed the hair off his back to let the air cool it.

After a few seconds he rolled off Cloud, his flaccid sex slipping out of the bleeding entrance like a snake.

"Happy birthday, love."

But Cloud had already passed out and so, smiling fondly, the sated General pulled the small body closer to himself and dragged up the fur blanket from the beneath the bed, sloppily covering them both with it.

He rested his lovers head in the crook of his arm, which was spread outwards as he tried to regulate his body temperature. Cloud was like a lifeless puppet, very much worn out by the evening's activities. The idea made him smirk

He felt complete there, with Cloud asleep in his arms, his seed still inside his body. He pulled the boy even closer and as the hours passed he found that sleep evaded him, and he just stared at the boy, fascinated by the simple act of breathing. The act quickly became like a distant, euphoric memory in his mind. Something that he was very much intent on re-living. Again and again.

And so Sephiroth laid there in his bed as he had so many months before with that one sentence ringing through his mind. But everything had changed now, and that sweet voice was no longer one of frustration and denial. It was now a part of him, and he of it.

_Sephiroth I love you._

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…

**So that was…tough. I actually found it hard to finish the whole thing because it was very intense and psychological. Also, this was my first time writing a sex scene and of course I was writing about two men which reeeeally makes it all the more difficult description-wise So, I'd love to hear what you all thought of this chapter; good or bad.**

**I apologize if this was too upsetting for anyone, I did try to warn you **

**Just want to say, yet again, thank you for all the kind and wonderful reviews for the last chapter. They're so detailed and complementary **

**That's it until the next chapter. See you then**

**By the way, writing about Sephiroth trying to dance was… awkward.**


	26. XXVI

**I'm not even going to make any excuses. I suck... but I'm determined to finish this fic, and I am conscious of how many people want to see an end to this story (if they even remember it at this point). So hopefully this will be the start of a whole new batch of updates until Elysium reaches it crescendo...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

**This fan fiction contains dark, upsetting psychological and sexual themes so if you are not comfortable with that kind of thing then please don't read because I don't want to upset anyone.**

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_Sephiroth scraped his gloved finger against the crumbling paint, digging his nail in until the chunk fell off and rolled to the ground in a shower of smaller fragments. He wore a plain expression as he regarded the scene in front of him with cool annoyance._

_Cloud was lying on his bed, one hand holding the pillow beneath his head, his fingers laced through his hair, and the other hand resting close by. A grim expression marred his face as he stared dully at the wall in front of him._

_It didn't annoy him to see Cloud unhappy, he was rarely in a good mood since the ordeal with Clarence, but it did annoy him when he saw which of the boy's 'friends' had come to comfort him for yet another evening._

"_So you don't feel like going out tonight?" The annoying voice of Zackary Fair bellowed in his ears, causing him to stiffen in annoyance._

"_No," his angel replied, "you can though. I'm probably just going to go to sleep early." _

_Sephiroth smiled at the suggestion. Yes, leave him alone._

"_Nah, I'll just stay here a while then," the reply wasn't unexpected enough to warrant a full glower, just a downward twitch of his lips. This __**pest**__. Zackary Fair couldn't fool him, he saw him for the hormonally driven teenager that he was. He knew why he was always sniffing around his boy, why he was always striving to place himself upon the saddle of the white night's beast, where trust would be bared to him as vulnerably as a tight fleshed gullet. _

"_I'm fine Zack." Cloud's throat bobbed over the edge of the knife, taunting it to action. _

"_I know, but I miss you sometimes, y'know?" _

_He didn't like the way Cloud reddened at the comment, smiling softly and ducking his head. He hated the way his boy saved special smiles for Zack, smiles that showed love and comfort and sometimes even lust._

_Yes, Sephiroth could see the way his boy stared at his friend; he wasn't so naive that he couldn't see how blinded he was by the sinister glamor, whose illusion was enhanced by the hormones in his young system. It infuriated him to hysteria, this crude wantonness, but he constantly soothed his soul with reminders that his boy would not be allowed to touch anyone but Sephiroth for as long as they both lived. If he ever did catch the boy doing anything of the sort then he would not stop himself from barging in and interrupting the act, no matter the time or place. He didn't care. Planning aside, Clouds virginity was his._

"_Fine," his boy sighed dramatically, falsely, sitting up and raising his brow at the other, "you can stay." _

_Sephiroth for his part just sighed heavily as he condemned himself to spending another night having to watch his cherub love someone else and ignore him. No, not even ignore him, because one had to be aware of the existence of something in order to ignore it._

_Cloud wasn't aware of him at all. He was as irrelevant standing out here as the cold blades of grass beneath his feet. Crunching, swaying, shivering, crying and reaching to deaf ears and numb hands._

_**For now**__, he reminded himself, __**for now.**_

_The night continued on with little variation as the two boys talked about nothing and everything in the bedroom, content to remain in each other's company as the hours passed. Sephiroth was angry that the few precious nights he took away from Modeoheim, where the days were spent in renovation and snowy missions, were almost constantly interrupted by the other boy's presence._

"_The reporters have stopped?" The dark haired boy's question interrupted his thoughts, and he listened with raised interest to the answer._

"_Yeah, finally," Cloud answered._

_Since the incident with Clarence, the one which he, to his admitted guilt, had orchestrated, the local media had been persistent in their pursuit of his boy, reveling in the sensationalism of the case. The police had issued a car to take the boy to and from school and otherwise he didn't seem to hold much interest in leaving the house. This public attention clearly upset and embarrassed Cloud, who was a shy creature by nature, and Sephiroth was genuinely sorry for causing him so much grief. It all only made him more anxious to complete the basement and get his boy away from all this misery and **shit.** _

"_It will be over soon." _

_A scoff answered Fair's comment as its creator fiddled with the hem of his T-shirt and looked out towards the window, spurring Sephiroth to boost the invisibility materia in his hand, more out of reflex than worry._

"_I can't stop thinking about it. He died. I…just... it's weird..."_

"_It wasn't your fault Cloud. Come on, you're going to make yourself sick thinking like that." Sephiroth wanted to tell the idiot to be silent, that he was nothing but a privileged child who had no concerns in his life beyond his schoolwork and a social life. He couldn't understand the complexity of Cloud's unhappiness and so the thought of him trying to give advice on the subject was laughable. Was this all Cloud had had for his whole life? This was his source of sanity? It was a dismal concept._

"_I know," _

_The object of his thoughts sighed, leaning his forehead on his hand, making Sephiroth uncomfortable. "I want to. I'm going to try."_

_Zack ruffled the boy's hair. He just leaned over and did it, as naturally as taking air into his own lungs._

_As naturally as he, in his mind, would stop him from ever doing so again._

"_That's all you can do I suppose."_

_The two boys were silent for a few minutes and Sephiroth had to watch with unease as Cloud allowed the boy to keep a hand on his shoulder until he eventually spoke again, turning to look his friend fully in the face._

"_Do you want to go out?" He asked. _

_Sephiroth pursed his lips, rolling his eyes up to the black sky as he willed the notion to simmer away. He didn't like Cloud attending those teenage parties, they were full of sex and drugs and every manner of obscenities. Surely Cloud knew the danger of them, his mind was not so fickle as to forget what had happened just a few short months ago. Why was he making such a treacherous request?_

"_Not really actually."_

_He looked back at the scene, his left brow arching up in surprised pleasure. And Zachary was the cause?_

"_Zack-"_

"_No seriously, I was just asking because I thought you might have wanted to. To be honest I have training and stuff tomorrow so it would be better if I left it. Plus…"_

"_What?"_

"_Well Angeal did threaten to take away my bike and put me into Shinra's training camp if I went out on a weekday again. Heh…"_

"_Ha," Cloud let out a bark of laughter as he stared at the boy incredulously while shaking his head. Zack gave a sheepish shrug and chuckled a bit._

"_You do realize he's going to act on those threats someday."_

"_Yeah probably."_

"_Alright well," Cloud sat up straight and rubbed at his hair a bit. Sephiroth thought he might have been trying to tidy it, which was a ridiculous and impossible feat. Cloud's hair was anything but tidy. Beautiful, silky, bright, but not tidy. "There are a couple of movies on tonight. Wanna go out there to watch something for a while?"_

"_Yeah okay. That sounds like a safer option. " _

_And so he watched his boy walk out from beneath his wing with a sinking feeling of despair that he wasn't able to block from his psyche. It was ridiculous to feel thus, knowing that within two months at the most Cloud would be with him thousands of miles away from anyone who could take him back, but every time he watched the boy with these people, watched how they were able to touch him and talk to him and make him smile, he grew angry and frustrated, and depressed. He knew Cloud wasn't in love with Zackary, they were just teenagers after all and the most Cloud was feeling for the boy was a vague inclination, but he worried that these feelings would be acted upon and that he would lose what rightfully belonged to him to a hormone induced impulse on either boy's part. That was why he had to return as soon as possible and finish his work. The sooner Cloud was with him the better._

_But he wasn't going back until the morning, and for now he needed something to override the blackness coiling in his core._

_He fell back from the wall in long steps, his back arched into a curve as he looked at the crumbling rooftop above his head. One of his many companions in this dying adventure._

_Once he was far back enough, his boots caged by the longer grass of the neglected patch, he fell into a crouch, his gloved fingers pressing into the soft ground as if seeking a pulse, and then letting it all fall away, the wind screaming in his ears as he ascended above its control._

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"_So why'd ya pick me?"_

_Sephiroth brought his eyes lazily upwards, smirking lightly at the smug look on the hustler's face. He could have been a handsome boy, if life and drug abuse hadn't dulled his features, sucked the rose from his cheeks, hollowed out his eyes and fused his bones with thin skin._

"_Does there have to be a reason?" He asked softly, running his eyes up and down the unbelievably narrow form. The boy's ribs poked out of his tight green vest and he could see the hipbones clearly due to the low riding skin-tight jeans. He was malnourished, but he wasn't the worst out here._

_The boy raised a pale brow and clicked his tongue._

"_N'really," he drawled, spinning on his heal in an attempt to be sexy, "just figured someone like you had a specific taste. The rich dogs usually do n'all."_

_Sephiroth chuckled as he watched the form wander around the space, the backroom of an abandoned warehouse a few miles outside the city, in feminine movements not suited to a male physique. He swayed and sauntered within the orange walls, dragging his fingers over the cracks that revealed the blue-white plaster underneath._

"_Well," Sephiroth started, taking a breath tainted with the damp scent of mold and dead construction, "I like blondes."_

_The kid let out a laugh._

"_Who don't?" He snorted wryly, giving him a genuinely amused grin, "Ya must like em young too." He gave the man a meaningful look. Sephiroth returned it evenly._

"_Yes. You're sixteen, am I correct?"_

"_Not accord'n ta the feds," was the quick answer as he placed a too curved hand on his skinny hip. _

"_I see," Sephiroth agreed, _"_I like blue eyes as well," he said after a minutes silence._

"_Hnn, comes with the blond," retorted the prostitute, pushing his greasy hair back from his face. "So… tell me," _

"_Yes," he coaxed, pushing himself off of the wall he was leaning against._

"_Why does the General of da Shinra army need to go looken for someone ta screw. __Woulda thought you'd have a line of eager cunts willing ta wet ya," the cheeky look on the boy's face was quite endearing._

_It was a shame what the world did to some people._

"_Oh I do" Sephiroth answered playfully, feeling titillated as he walked languidly towards the short boy, who in turn looked up at him, impressively unafraid. "I just find that…adoration is a turn off."_

"_How d'ya know __**I**__ don't adore ya?" The boy challenged, studying his form. Sephiroth let out a laugh and fingered a strand of the greasy blond bangs._

"_You wouldn't know what adoration means. People like you don't adore, you hate the planet, you want to see it corrupted and destroyed. You have nothing to worship." _

_The boy swallowed heavily, he backed off a bit and scratched his head._

"_Yeesh, way'ta make a guy feel like crap," he muttered, turning away from him slightly._

"_I apologize if I have offended you," he said flatly, not conveying any sign that he was truly sorry for his words._

"_Been called worse," the teen shrugged, giving him another wry grin as if nothing else had ever been present on that particular mouth. His left eye kept twitching._

"_Indeed." _

"_So, we gonna keep talking for the night or are we gonna get ta business? My guy don't like it when I spend too long on one client," Sephiroth tilted his head._

"_Does he know where you are?" His voice showed disinterest, idleness, but the question was vital._

"_Nah, he just counts the Gil the next day an can always tell if I haven't done enough. No one knows m'here," the poor creature answered unwittingly. Sephiroth smiled; pleased._

"_That's quite dangerous," he mused. The boy shrugged again._

"_It's a dangerous lot."_

_Sephiroth kept his gaze on the young hustler and he could see it was unnerving him. The boy scratched his arm, where awful bruises darkened the skin on the inside of his elbow, and blew his hair out of his eyes._

"_So, we gonna…" he cut himself off, giving the man what he thought was a suggestive look. But his eye wouldn't stop twitching._

"_All right then, it is getting late," Sephiroth agreed. He stepped back from the light, leaving the teenager standing alone in it._

"_Wha'cha want me ta do?" The boy asked, clearly confused by his actions._

"_Strip."_

_The boy smirked, not the least bit abashed by the command._

_He watched on then as the hustler began pulling his top over his head, moving in slow, angled movements that were meant to entice. He pulled the skimpy article completely off and let it hang from his thumb for a minute while he struck a formulated pose and stared at the General in askance._

"_Like what ya see?" He queried smugly, a tilt to his lips._

_Sephiroth stared at the pale torso, studying the bony chest and the mapped abdomen. Another image flashed through his mind; someone else's torso. It was lean, but not skinny like this boy, and it didn't have any of the bruises or marks like the one in front of him. And the skin was lighter and more- he brought his eyes towards the others face._

"_Continue," he ordered briskly. _

_The boy mistook his annoyance for eagerness and with a self-satisfied smile began running his hands down his stomach following the lines of his pelvis and then looping them together in the golden zipper of his tight pants. He pulled the zipper downwards and then began to slowly slide the pants down his thighs. Sephiroth studied the red marks across the hips and above the legs from the tight pants as they were removed._

_The boy stepped out of the jeans gracefully, which was not an easy feat considering their size, and then stood up unashamed of his nudity._

_Flashes began to cross through Sephiroth's mind, the body in front of him changing from malnourished and scrawny, to healthy and lithe, gray skin turned alabaster and smugness turned to modesty. An angel, not trash, stood before him then._

"_Turn around," he commanded in a deep voice, his body beginning to catch up to his mind._

_The hustler rose a brow but did as he was told, flattered by the man's intensity. General Sephiroth was quite a catch of course._

_The man in question studied the back before him, the curve of the visible spine and the pear shaped buttocks._

"_No tattoos?" He questioned lowly._

"_Nah," the boy laughed, "not into that shit."_

"_Usually different pimps demand it, don't they?" Sephiroth asked, his mind morphing the image in front of him to suit his demands._

"_Not my guy." _

"_Hmm." Sephiroth began walking forward, approaching the form. The boy turned towards him, his eyes becoming clouded with lust. He was clearly into exhibitionism, because he was already hard against his concaved stomach._

_Sephiroth stopped and smirked down at him. It wasn't a teenage prostitute in front of him anymore, the hair rose to spikes that tickled his chin as he leaned down, the skin plumped and glowed, the eyes became bright and large._

_A tentative hand rose towards his chest where the buckles exposed his hard skin and he allowed it, shivering at the contact of the bony fingers._

"_So strong," the boy drawled, mesmerized. "Ye're like a god. As real as any I've ever fucking touched."_

_Sephiroth clicked his tongue, wrapping an arm around the small waist and jerking the boy tightly against his body, earning himself a grunt from the younger mouth._

"_I am a god."_

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_I'm your god Cloud._

_Cloud._

_Cloud_

Cloud opened his eyes, closing them again when a bright light threatened to torch his irises into permanent ash. As he waited for them to adjust he became aware of how strange the rest of his body felt. His ears were ringing loudly and his limbs felt like the bones and muscles had been boiled to rubber beneath his skin. His mind was still fuzzy from lethargy so he couldn't properly make sense of anything aside from the notion that he was lying on a bed that was too hot, in a room that was too bright.

"Nnngh,"

A jolt of burning pain woke him up completely, everything else forgotten, and his eyes widened as he attempted to move his legs again.

"Ah-"

He twisted in the sheets, wincing as the movement jolted his body, which felt like it had been trampled by a Behemoth. He pushed the blankets away from his face, feeling suffocated and hot.

"Uh," he grunted when he tried to move again, the pain in his lower body becoming more horrific. It was burning him, actually scorching him like a live flame licking its way inside any entryway it could find. His chest hurt too, and his shoulders, and his neck. Every part of him, and he felt sick and dizzy.

_Rape._

Yes, he knew exactly what had happened, why he felt this way. It was clawing at the back of his mind, live demons with sharp claws tearing away at the meat of his psyche and pushing forward to his conscious, woken mind.

He swallowed, wincing at the pain in his chest again. He felt terrible. This wasn't how he was supposed to feel after losing his virginity. He never wanted to be penetrated that way, that's not what his body was built for, and if he was it was supposed to be with someone he loved and trusted. Someone who could make it worth the pain.

No, he didn't feel good at all. He felt filthy, violated, used, cheep… disgusting. He wanted to scream, he wanted to cry, he wanted to beg for it not to be true. But all he could do was lie there, ignoring the flaky feeling between his legs, the agony, and try to breathe normally.

In out Inout I-n, o-out in in out.

He felt a movement beside him and his entire body went as still as a fragment of crystal.

"Hmmm, good morning love," Sephiroth's lethargic voice reminded him of a Dual Horn's growl, low and rumbling, but threatening a much worse bite. A searing arm made its way around his waist and he gasped at the feeling of their bare skin touching.

The nights events came flooding back into his head, the physicality of the ordeal. Everything; the sounds, the feelings, the fear, the silence, the pain. It was overwhelming him and he closed his eyes tightly in an attempt to will the memories away.

"Shhh, it's alright."

He hadn't realized he was making noise until his captor began silencing him, combing fingers through his hair and stroking his face. He tried to block out the caresses, he couldn't bear them now. Not after…

He wouldn't open his eyes. If he didn't open them to this new day, then he didn't have to be in it.

This was the start of the most perfect day Sephiroth would live.

He never wanted to wake up any other way but this again. Everything was so perfect, so comfortable; the feeling of Cloud's warm body against his, the soft blankets around them, the light shining through the large window, the smell of their love making still lingering in the air. It was something out of a dream, and yet it was reality. A reality he had created. He felt himself become hard, not an unusual reaction to having Cloud Strife naked beside him he supposed.

Not satisfied with having to stare at the back of the boy's head, he placed a hand on his shoulder and slowly turned him around, noticing the reluctance clear on his face. Cloud was the most beautiful creature he had ever beheld, it was obvious at that moment, his pretty face glowing in the morning light, a tear running across his lightly freckled nose, his big eyes pressed closed. He was perfect.

"It's alright," he whispered, running his hand up and down the length of Cloud's arm, feeling the goose bumps there.

Cloud thought that he would have preferred being anywhere, absolutely anywhere, than where he was at that moment. In a bed with the man who had… raped him. Having to put up with his false words and actions, too afraid to protest to either. It was hell, the very definition. He moved his legs as the pain between them flared up again. Sephiroth noticed the reaction.

"Are you sore?" He questioned. Cloud's cheeks tinged red as he remained silent.

"I understand, it will get better soon enough though, and eventually it won't hurt. You'll get used to it."

His eyes finally opened then, widened until he imagined his lids tearing away from each other as he grasped what had been said. It should have been obvious that Sephiroth would want to do it again, rape him again, but at that moment Cloud couldn't fathom hearing anything worse. It pulled him further into the darkness and despair.

His fingers dug into his own palms and he was surprised at how week they felt. Sephiroth pulled him in closer until they were lying on the same pillow, their noses almost touching.

"You're not used to it yet Cloud," he whispered, his eyes following the finger still running through the blond spikes. "It will get easier, I promise you that."

"…" Cloud had no time to respond as he found his lips captured in the first kiss of the day. He chocked a bit in his throat but otherwise let it happen, his stomach doing flip-flops while he tried to keep still.

The fact that the boy's mouth felt dry and he had yet to brush his teeth didn't take away from the pleasantness of the kiss for Sephiroth. This is the way he wanted it to be, he wanted to be able to wake up beside his boy and be able to kiss those delectable lips first thing in the morning. He was finally able to do that now and was in no way under appreciative of the fact.

In a surge of energy he grabbed the blond with both arms and rolled over so the boy was on top of him, the blankets twisted about both of their legs. Cloud was startled at the sudden action and it showed on his face as he stared down at him, along with the pain the movement caused.

"My apologies," he drawled, looking at the boy fondly. Cloud lowered his eyes to the hands braced against the man's chest, awkwardly trying to avoid his nipples. The effort of keeping his head up was unusually difficult and the feeling of their skin pressed so awkwardly together was making him nervous and ill. "We are as we were meant to be now, do you understand?"

Cloud just frowned.

"Don't look so sad love..." Sephiroth squeezed the teen to himself, almost trying to meld their bodies into one. He let the boy up after a few minutes, taking the time to study the red marks dotting his neck and chest. He smile faltered at the look of some of the bites; he had gotten carried away, but he was mostly proud to see his claim upon the young skin. He traced a finger over the juncture of Cloud's neck and shoulder, shifting in order to hide his arousal.

They stayed like that for over an hour, Sephiroth petting and complementing his young lover, who in turn remained silent and eventually let his head fall onto the strong chest, partly from exhaustion and partly because he didn't want the man to see his sadness, the only sounds escaping his lips being gasps or whimpers of pain when his body was forced to move. Eventually Sephiroth decided that it was time for breakfast, which they would have together.

He eased the boy back against the mattress as softly as he could before getting out of the bed.

Cloud moved himself so he was sitting up slightly while clutching the blankets tight to his neck. He closed his eyes because the morning light was hurting and because he was not comfortable with his captor's nakedness; he didn't want anything to trigger anymore memories from the night before. He sighed in relief when Sephiroth walked into the adjoining bathroom.

Sephiroth took a few minutes to relieve his bladder and splash his face with cold water before he grabbed the black robe hanging from the wall hook and put it on. He walked back into his bedroom moments later to see Cloud still sitting as he was, his fingers laced in the blankets on his knees. He looked a little pale and sweaty but Sephiroth assumed it was due to the trauma. He walked over to his dresser and pulled a out blue linen shirt.

Cloud watched the man approach him, realizing this was the first time he had ever seen Sephiroth in something other than his leather outfit. It was…strange. It made him look different. More human, but also more predatory. Sephiroth dressed in his armor was General Sephiroth, and despite all the bad things he had done to him there was still a heroic aura around the title, something familiar perhaps. Now he looked just like the stranger he really was, and that made him almost more terrifying.

"Here," his kidnapper said, handing him the blue material he was holding, "I have no extra robes. I don't think they'd fit you very well even if I did. " Cloud cautiously took the article, biting his lip as he held it on his lap.

"Do you need help getting it o-"

He shook his head quickly, his eyes dropping down to look at the pale blue fabric more closely. It looked unhappy and breathless, sprawled across his lap like the aftermath of a murder.

Sephiroth shrugged and walked over to the window, gazing out at the snowy plain. The white light turned him, his skin and his hair, white, but Cloud knew that wasn't his true color. It was a joke played by the heavens, more torment for him to withstand.

He bit his lip as he sat up straighter, his chest and lower body burning with exertion. He slowly pulled the material around himself, his hands finding the sleeves and pulling into them, they barely came halfway through. He rolled the material back off his forearms and then proceeded to tie the buttons down his chest, his shaking numb fingers not able to entertain his mind's wish for haste. Once the shirt was closed he smoothed it out and saw that it reached almost to his knees which he was glad for, but then he saw something which made his body turn cold.

Blood.

There was blood all over the sheets around him. It was scattered in dark brown and light red blotches, clotted and wiped into the linen.

He slid himself over to the left and looked at the extent of the stains. It was awful...

Was he bleeding? Was that normal? It was his… Gaia. He began breathing faster, pulling up the shirt and looking at more of the discolored stains all over his thighs.

He was going to be sick.

"It's alright," he brought his desperate eyes towards Sephiroth who was looking down at the stained sheet. He quickly covered his legs again, keeping his eyes on the man.

"It happens the first few times, it's just caused by the friction. It stopped quickly so there's nothing to worry about. I wouldn't put you in danger."

Cloud had to swallow the emotions welling up in his throat, his heart thrumming loudly. Sephiroth smirked and ruffled his hair.

"Shall we?" He asked. He just continued to watch the man, his eyes stinging at the corners.

_I wouldn't put you in danger._

_"I'll tie you up again." _

_"Say you love me."_

_"SAY IT."_

The blond grit his teeth as he sat upright, slowly twisting himself around, then moving his legs outwards and placing them on the ground.

"A-ah."

A burning pain shot up his spine and he lent forward in order to alleviate it. "I ca- I cant." He breathed, trying to sit up again.

Sephiroth was surprised at the amount of pain the boy was in, he moved over to the side of the bed where the boy was currently breathing as if he had taken a shock materia to the gut.

"What are you…?" Cloud looked around in confusion when he suddenly felt himself been lifted into the air, Sephiroth holding him beneath his knees and shoulders. He gripped the man's shoulder out of instinct and looked down towards the floor.

Sephiroth smirked, pressing the boy against his chest. He knew his pain was nothing to be concerned with as he'd already checked the boy for damages while he slept, but he didn't want to make things any more miserable for the poor creature. Even if every wince he made excited him...

"Let's go."

At any other time Cloud knew he would have kicked and screamed and writhed under such indignity, fighting until he was free of the hold, but that morning he couldn't find it in him to do more than close his eyes and count the steps as Sephiroth carried him out of the room, down through the hall and then the carpeted staircase. Every jolt of his body hurt, and every sway made his stomach churn, but otherwise he felt strangely numb to the whole thing, some tingling layer of mist coating his skin, cutting off perception to the stimuli around him. He thought it might be what a ghost felt, present in the bridge of time but not able to make contact with anything within it, perhaps too traumatized by their own death to try...

_"Say you love me."_

So cut off he felt, that when Sephiroth finally let him down onto the thick cushions of the larger sitting room couch, he let out a gasp of surprise at the feeling of the cold material and his own pain. It felt like he'd been dropped through ice, the pain first as the hardness cracked and split on impact, and then the jolt of the freezing liquid beneath.

"Wait here. Relax. I'll bring you some food..." Sephiroth's voice pushed through it all with grating sharpness, because the demons of hell were never drowned out by the fires they lit, or the screaming they tore from the lungs of the damned.

Cloud didn't answer him. How could he? If he opened his mouth he'd scream, and never stop doing so until he tore his throat to bloody carnage and dislodged his broken heart from its bony coffin. He couldn't speak anymore. He couldn't acknowledge it.

Sephiroth took an audible breath above him, and Cloud flinched severely, a white jolt of fright running up his whole body, as the man reached down towards him.

He took a breath, curling back into the cushions behind him as far as he could, and waiting for the next horror in this never ending wave of terror.

"Cloud,"

But Sephiroth's voice was calm and a convincing imitation of kindness, his fingers running lightly under his chin and moving his face up to look at him. His eyes blazed in the bright morning, and Cloud could barely hear what he was saying, so enraptured and caged by the green.

"I won't let you act like a victim anymore Cloud. Even you can't deny the importance of last night. How perfect it was. So _don't _try to ruin it."

The words were blurred and low, and all he could do was stare back at their creator until his chin was released again and he could look away. Sephiroth fiddled around beside him for a few seconds then, searching for what turned out to be the remote control for the huge flat-screen television fixed into the white wall directly across from them.

The black screen came to life in a dissipation of static and crackling of mechanics, Cloud watched the images materialize in dull disinterest, a red and white metallic studio with a well groomed man and attractive woman speaking to the camera from behind the desk. The National News.

"I'll be back soon. Here."

The cold plastic was pressed into his hands, the soft rubber buttons digging harmlessly into his crackling skin. He didn't take it in, didn't welcome it within his grasp, but just let it and his hand lay dead on his lap as Sephiroth ran one more brisk hand through his hair and walked out of the room.

And there he was left, in this cold foreign room, wrapped in cold foreign material, sitting on a cold foreign couch and thinking with a cold foreign mind. But at the same time he felt hot, like there was a fire lit inside of him that wouldn't allow him to cool down no matter how much he shifted or pulled the collar away from his neck. He felt a damp line of sweat beneath his chin as he ran his fingers under it, and could feel more perspiration gathering along his hairline.

But what did it matter now really? What did it matter if he was too hot, or too cold, or warm, or cool? What difference did it make now? Did anyone ever stop to consider what the temperature of a coffin would be once closed and buried, whether the satin, wood and soil would combine to cook with the efficiency of an incinerator whatever had been laid to rest inside? Did they anguish over whether the frosted ground would seep in through the porous materials of its makeup and turn everything within the casket to ice and damp mold?

No one thought of these things, because they didn't need to. Because the only one who would suffer the results of this neglect would be the lifeless dead remnants of a creature gone, the meat of living souls. The dead couldn't feel cold, couldn't be scorched, they didn't shiver and they didn't sweat.

So it didn't matter that he felt like his skin was boiling away from his bones. He was dead as well now.

Cloud Strife, Dead?

He blinked, the white stodgy lettering so clear to his mind's eye that he could see it perfectly in front of him. Even when he blinked and opened his eyes again it was there, the symbols of the fact.

Cloud Strife, Dead?

And a picture of a long worm-like bag beneath, at the bottom left corner of the image. It was moving, carried over grass and stone by nameless hands while streams of writing zipped all around like a demented version of a Wutian music video.

This wasn't his mind. It was the screen in front of him. The big flat screen which Sephiroth had turned on, blaring the reflection of his own thoughts back at him like a giant bloodshot eye.

His heart sped up and he clamored with the remote control in his hands for several seconds before he was able to press down on the volume button and listen as the woman's faux voice became audible to his ringing ears.

"**A body has been found in the rock-lands east of Midgar City in the early hours of this morning. The body, which is believed to have been badly decomposed and perhaps incinerated, was found by a traveling merchant on his way to the city, who contacted the authorities immediately upon the sighting. Though there is very little information available at this current time, it has been suggested that this might be the remains of the missing teenager, Cloud Strife. We will follow this story throughout the day, so stay tuned to this station, which always breaks the news before anyone else!"**

Cloud's breath evacuated him, no longer willing to remain in a vessel that had no wish for its sustenance. His eyes flickered back and forth across the flashing screen, white foam beginning to seep in all around like oncoming frost on a windshield. The long black bag, the shape of a deadened cocoon, and his face, younger, smiling and still beside it.

The floating words.

Cloud Strife, Dead?

Missing teenager found.

Body uncovered.

Cloud Strife, Dead?

Cloud Strife. Dead.

The last thing he was aware of was the remote slipping out of his hand, sliding over the edge of the couch cushions, and into the thick fibers of the sheep-wool carpet below,

and himself following after it.

Sephiroth heard the bang and rushed in to find his boy in a heap on the floor in front of the couch, unconscious and flushed red.

As it turned out, his charge had a mild fever with joint symptoms of nausea and headaches, not in any real danger but ill all the same for the following days.

He had had to get medicine and extra potions from the branch on the mountain and monitor his patient for the whole of the first night, but by early the next morning his temperature had returned to normal and his color was bettering. Still uncomfortable however, the boy was lethargic and stayed in bed, Sephiroth's bed, for most of the next two days, only getting up to relieve himself in the small bathroom or ease the stiffness in his body by pacing the room. He was quiet and solemn and pale throughout his recovery and only managed to consume a few spoonfuls of peppered broth.

By the fourth day he was healthy again, but only physically.

Sephiroth was used to Cloud ignoring him, and flinching every time he came close. However his boy's new behavior was… unsettling.

He was calm, he did what he was asked to do, he took his medicine and what food he could manage without complaint, he acted without argument and he was generally well behaved. But it wasn't real. His eyes were glazed and unfocused and there was no life to his movements. As though he had turned into a puppet willed by the master's stringed fingers. It was disconcerting to the man, who had hoped that this distance would be bridged by what had happened between them, not elongated.

He wasn't a fool, he knew Cloud wouldn't be thrilled about what occurred and had expected the silent treatment and nervous behavior for some time, but this was something different. He didn't know how to handle this... ghostliness.

So, in true form to a problem he had no solution to, he'd brushed it to the side and focused on healing the boy's body for the time being, hoping the rest would follow eventually. Hoping...

Then on the fifth day after the boy's birthday something happened which caused this dynamic to change.

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"Where is she?"

If Zack wasn't sweating half his body weight out of his pores, and about to puke up a month full of food all over the speckled ground, he might have felt sheer embarrassment at the fact that his very loud and very dramatic shout was met with the startled but jaded eyes of everyone in the hospital reception area.

It wasn't busy in there, so the staff had more than likely just been lounging around the front desk passing time, and the few people sitting in the waiting chairs didn't't seem to be in any dire straits. Making his outburst all the more out of place.

He cleared his throat, scuffing the heel of his boot on the ground before walking forward, letting the door swing closed behind him.

"Hi," he said once he reached the front desk. He ran a shaky hand through his hair and breathed out slowly, still struggling to catch his breath from his hectic run up here. "Uh, Sky Strife was brought in here during the night… I didn't't know or I'd have come earlier but I … uh anyway where is she? Which room?"

The nurse gave him a small smile, her tired face wrinkling into heavy lines all around her eyes and lips. She mumbled something that sounded like 'one moment' and then started tapping on the computer's keyboard in front of her.

His own fingers started to drum on the counter top as he waited, idly looking around at the medical fliers and posters tapped to the light blue walls.

**Get the life back in your stream.**

**Dealing with the stigma.**

**Green with envy or acute Mako poisoning?**

"Okay," he turned back to the woman when she spoke again, her eyes still on the screen beneath him. "Are you her son?"

That struck him like a vat of hot oil over the head. He closed his eyes and willed himself to keep composure.

"No," he said softly, pressing his tongue flat against the bottom of his mouth. "No, I'm not. I'm a close friend."

"Alright," the nurse said, seemingly unaware of the impact of her question. "Well she hasn't had any family visit yet so if you get in contac-"

"That's not possible at the moment," he interrupted firmly, struggling to keep his voice even. Did this woman live in a rock? He would have thought that everyone in the city knew who Sky Strife was by now.

"Alright. Well she's in room 445. Down the hall, to the left. She was brought in due to a severe seizure, most likely caused by the high levels of toxins in her blood, and is stable now. The doctor can inform you of the details if you'd like to speak with him later." She gave him another soft smile but he just nodded back with his lip's closed shut.

"Thanks," he said, and then turned away from the desk to go as directed.

As he walked through the claustrophobic corridors with their modern paintings and antiseptic air systems, he thought over what the woman had said. High levels of toxins in her blood. No, that's not what had happened here. It was her heart that was failing, halted by the devastating news he was himself trying to block out. The possibility that this was all coming to an end in the worst way imaginable.

"It's not confirmed", the words had been running through his mind for hours now, a single raft in a black, stormy ocean, "it has to be confirmed first. I have to make her understand that."

The door was closed when he reached it, turquoise blue with a heavy steel handle, and instead of opening it right away he leaned his head against its cool surface and took in a breath. He felt sick to his stomach since the moment he had heard that the woman had collapsed and was rushed into hospital during the night, since Angeal had woken him up before that with the halting news.

He had thought she was looking worse these days, but figured that was bound to happen all things considered. Now she had to deal with this, and she might… he wasn't able to even consider any more bad news, but he had to, and he just felt overwhelmed with everything.

"Stop feeling sorry for yourself," he whispered softly, squeezing his eyes shut. "This isn't about you." And with that he shook his head and stood up straight, ruffling the hair that had fallen around his face and grabbed the door handle. He had to be strong. With Cloud not around he had to be there for Sky, and she had to know he was there.

The second he opened the door his ears picked up the horribly familiar sounds of heart monitors beeping and oxygen machines gasping. He stepped into the darkly lit room and closed the door behind him with a gentle click.

"Oh Zackary," that was Shera Highwind. Zack was surprised to find someone else in the room, and stood there awkwardly as the thin woman got up from where she had been sitting beside the bed and smiled at him. A shy smile full of small teeth and big gums.

"Hi," he whispered, glancing at the bed where a desperately thin Sky was lying, numerous tubes and wires running like exterior veins from her body. The sight wasn't unusual, for he had been to visit Sky with Cloud often when she was ill, but he hated it every time. "How is she?"

"Not very well. She suffered a m-mild heart attack, caused by bad bacteria clogging the… caused by the fright… it happened during a seizure that put her body under pressure." Zack took in the words with prolonged dread. Heart attack? That hadn't happened before.

"An…now?" He mumbled. The woman lowered her head to her right shoulder as she looked back at the slumbering patient.

"I don't…the doctor seemed very negative to me. He wasn't saying anything but I could tell by him. She h-hasn't woken up yet, and they don't know when she will…" She pressed her thin lips together and shook her head. "it was the fright. It was the last thing she needed. How could people be so inconsiderate as to broadcast something like that before the people concerned have even had a chance to take it in? They did this to her." Zack definitely agreed with that, they were guilty.

"Zackary, I'm glad you're here. I have to get home and run a few errands so I was hoping someone would stay here in case she wakes. Are you in a-"

"No, no I can stay," the dark haired teen answered, nodding his head up and down while keeping his eyes on the bed. "Take your time; I'll just sit here for a while."

"Okay." Shera went over to the chair where a light pink coat and similar colored hand-bag were sitting. She didn't't put on the coat but hung it over her forearm, and then picked up the bag.

"I'll be back as soon as I can," she said to him and he just nodded.

"Take your time."

Once she left he walked over to the bed and looked down.

Sky looked awful. Terrible. If Cloud were here he'd be freaking out big time. Jack could see that the woman's body fat had diminished so much that almost every bone on her face was visible, jutting painfully out of her features at like a cluster of sharp edged seashells. Her face could have been that of a skull if not for the mass of blonde curls and chapped lips. There was a wire under her nose with two tubes sticking into her nostrils and their pale color all but matched that of her deathly skin.

Her shoulders and arms were the only thing visible beneath the thick blue hospital issued blanket, and they were shockingly narrow as well. Like, Zack didn't think a living person could be that thin. Then he thought of the homeless people he passed every day, the begging children and sickly old men in the alleyways and gutters, and thought that they were probably similarly as wraith-like, only he'd never taken much notice.

He let out a long throaty sigh and collapsed himself into the uncomfortable leather seat beside the bed. He leaned his elbows on the seat and bent forward. Gaia, the amount of needles the woman had in her. It was hard for him to think she could handle them. She was too weak.

"Sky," he breathed out, shaking his head. "What in holy happened to us all?"

The machine beside him answered with a shrill beep.

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Sky didn't wake up for four days.

Zack stayed at the hospital each of these days for a couple of hours, mumbling nonsensical things to the unconscious woman, updating her on the news of the discovered body, which still hadn't been identified, and just trying to keep her company. Others visited throughout the hours; Angeal came with him twice, Yuffie, Tifa, Leon and Yuna at different intervals and some other people he didn't know.

Sky was fed through a drip and given some potions that revitalized vitamin and fluid loss. She was kept on breathing tubes and other things Zack didn't really understand, things that kept her body alive and thrumming even if her mind was already gone. The doctors visited frequently, and every time Zack saw them press their wrinkled lips together and make a 'hmm' sound he wanted to shake them, destroy the negativity they'd unconsciously created in his mind and make them understand how vital it was that they performed a miracle, stood at the peak of their profession and made this sick woman _better_.

That wasn't going to happen though, it was a truth that had lodged itself in his gut and refused to be budged, the prognosis was too bad. Sky's body was failing, her organs were struggling to function and her pulse was slowing to the point where it had to be pressed upon heavily to even feel its tiny push. She had developed Jaundice which meant her liver wasn't working properly, and her breathing was becoming more strained.

Zack had sat in his room on the fourth night, leaning against the far wall because lying on a bed made him feel guilty now, having been forced home by Sheera and a scuffle of the nursing staff on the grounds that he needed rest. Rest? What a fucking joke. How could he have comfort and rest when people he loved were suffering?

The thought ran through his head again and again and threatened to drive him to lunacy. Sky wasn't going to die. She couldn't die now, it just wasn't the right time. If she died it meant that that terrible morning when Cloud had disappeared was the last morning he would ever see his mom, talk to her, say goodbye to her. That would kill him. He loved his mother, more than anyone else in the world; if he came back and she was just gone it would simply destroy him.

Zack didn't know why he felt it was his fault, but he did. He felt like it was his job to take care of the woman and make sure she was okay until… well he didn't know when. Now he felt like he had just let another person down. He couldn't do anything to help. The notion of heroes seemed further away from reality than ever before.

If Sky died, and Cloud never came back, if the body they found was… it would be like they were never there in the first place. The apartment would be gone, the name would be gone. It would all be nothing more than a memory in his head, one that no one would want to linger on and hear about in the years of his life to come.

The phone ringing in his pocket was perhaps a blessed relief, cutting short the dismal image of his own life to come.

"Hello," he pressed it to his ear without checking the caller information, knowing now that the brunt of disappointment was too hard to bear when he raised hope. But upon hearing the first word the caller spoke, he quickly straightened up against the wall and pressed the plastic into the side of his head so hard it made his skull groan.

"Jack, is that you?"

"Yes. Whats going on."

Sheera breathed loudly into the phone, her answer following immediately after the gust.

"Skye has woken up Jack," but before he had a chance to take in the delight that buzzed through him at the words she continued, deadening it black. "You should come as soon as you can."

As soon as you can. As in, before you cant.

"I'll be there soon."

With that he headed out the door, keys swinging around his fingers.

When he got there- luckily in one piece considering the neck breaking speed he'd rode his bike over the busy wet streets, was met with Shera and Cid who were waiting in the corridor outside Sky's door. Shera's face was red and tears were running down her blanched cheeks as she blew her nose into a scrunched up tissue. She barely had the voice to greet him and it was Cid, who was holding an unlit cigarette between his teeth as he held the woman by the shoulders, who told him that the doctors were in the room now and they could go in once they were done.

"I-is Angeal coming?" Shera choked between sniffles, her eyes peeking out over the tissue.

"I couldn't get through to him. I tried but he's not answering." Another reason he was lucky he didnt resemble the Chocobo that tried to cross the road.

"Well, hopefully he'll call back...in time."

The two doctors came out a few minutes later, mumbling to each other until they regarded the three civilians, the innocents in the war of the flesh, waiting for their words. The older man cleared his throat, handing a blue orb of materia back to his younger colleague and then giving them one of those professionally grim looks.

"Spit it out ol' man."

Zack really loved Cid at that moment.

"Yes," the doctor said, looking a bit perturbed but gathering himself quickly. "Well, I'm sorry to tell you that Miss Strife has reached the final moments of her struggle with this illness. The toxins in her blood have shut down most of her organs by now, and her lungs have filled with fluid that we can no longer drain. If you want to say you're goodbyes, I'd advise you do it now. I've given her a stone CureA to deal with the discomfort and this also has the effect of dulling her conscious mind."

The news was met with a hoarse sigh from Cid, a sob from Shera and a silent sigh of resignation from the youngest of them all.

"I must warn you before you go in that Miss Strife isn't herself. Both her appearance and mentality have been affected severely by the Geostigma and you might find it upsetting."

"T-thank you doctor," Shera managed through sobs, the old man nodded and with another sorrowful look walked away, the younger man trailing at his heels. Putting this case behind them and hoping for more luck in the next.

"Well," Cid sighed, placing his hands on his hips and looking around himself. "Ya better get in there Fair, looks like there aint much time left."

"Nah, you can go in first if you want," Zack inwardly called himself a coward; at least the Chocobo was brave enough to attempt the road.

Both adults shook their heads at him.

"We've …already been with her… You go… Zack, it's you she wants to see," Shera assured him through hiccups, her drooping eyes staring at him in a way that made it impossible to say no.

"Well," he scratched at the back of his head and shrugged, "okay then… I'll go."

There were less mechanical sounds in the room this time, no need for them now, and all the lights had been turned on. He walked in and saw Sky turn her head quickly in his direction.

Her eyes.

He halted his step, his heal literally making a skidding sound against the polished floor. Gaia, her eyes weren't right. They were green. Pure green. Not one bit of blue remained in the irises. It was awful. She looked like some sort of creature with her face like a skull and those…demon eyes in her head. This wasn't her... he didn't know this person.

"I-is someone there..." her voice was strange, high-pitched and breathy. She moved her head around, and Zack stood there with his eyes wide; actually considering going back out the door. Could she see him?

"Hell-o? Are you trying to find the switch? It's in the back,"

_Her mentality has been affected. _

"Uh, Sky?" He said, taking a few steps forward. Her head moved in his direction again and he tried not to grimace at the horrible sight of her.

"Yessss. Who i-s it? Com…in." He scratched at his shin with the back of his boot as he stared at her. Then he nodded and walked over, taking the seat beside the bed. Gaia, she looked worse close up. This wasn't what people were supposed to look like.

"Hey," he whispered, reaching out a hand and letting it fall on the mattress about an inch from her arm.

"Hello," she said just as softly, giving him a small smile. "I'd offer…. you tea… b-ut everything'sss 'n boxes. Ha… I don't even ha-ve a cup or…"

"It's alright." She pressed her lips together and closed her eyes.

"Peo-ple keep co' ing in here you kn-ow," her words were drawn out and he saw liquid gather at the corner of her eyes. His own eyes...

"Who?" He asked, humoring her, knowing that anything else would just cause her stress. She shook her head.

"You're …say such stra-nge things… I 'eed a lock for the front door, door. Men are coming in. I th-ink they're trying to ttt-ake something. Oh Minerva… the baby in the crib." Her face became pinched and she tried to sit up. Zack stood up from his chair and placed a hand on her shoulder, gasping at how far his fingers sunk into the fabric of the hospital gown.

"No, uh. It's okay… the baby's okay," he hushed her, slowly easing her back onto the pillow. Her eyes flew around the room, their wildness giving him chills up his spine. Finally they landed on him and she breathed out a sigh that sounded like relief sloshing around in sewer water.

"Oh there you a-re," she whispered, a big smile forming on her face. He mirrored the expression, so happy that she could see him.

"Yeah, I'm here. I'm with you," he said, moving his hand down to grasp hers. A tear slid down her temple as she looked at him.

"Clo'. My Clou-d-dy," slowly, a hand lifted towards his face, brushing her fingers over his chin. He sighed. She thought…

"No," he said automatically, pulling out of the touch.

"O-oh stop that Sw-sweetheart. So shy," then her eyes grew wide again and she broke into a violent fit of coughing. When he saw the black ink-like substance sliding between her lips he considered calling for the doctor. However the fit subsided soon and with a few painful sounding swallows the woman quieted and sunk back into her pillow.

"Ohhhhhhhhh," she moaned, squeezing her eyes closed. "Oh, you'll be al' right Clo-ud. Wont you? Pr-promise mommy you'll b-e al-right."

Zack felt the stinging sensation behind his eyeballs that told him tears were on their way. He sniffed and squeezed her hand, not caring that all he could feel was the cold points of her bones.

"Yes…" he answered, nodding his head earnestly. "I promise… I promise he'll be okay… I don't know how…" he ducked his head and let the liquid gather beneath his lids. "He'll be alright."

"Okay," the woman opened her eyes and looked up at the ceiling, her lids widening as they fixed on a certain spot.

"Oh… dear. There you are. Oh. Allll-right… I'm rea-dy now."

Zack watched as she sucked in a long, loud liquid breath. Then a look of piece came over her face, all the pain seeping away.

It was strange to watch her life, and everything that had been unwillingly attached to it leak out of her body and just leave her there. On the bed. There, but not there.

He kept holding her hand, tears streaming down his face even though he wasn't making any sounds or movements otherwise. The monitor started screaming the moment the woman's heart stopped, but it was a few seconds before anyone, nurse or doctor, showed up to do what they did when this happened.

He was led out of the room by one of them, and there he waited with Cid and Shera until the doctors came out and announced that Sky Strife was certainly dead. Alone on that night, with only him beside her, Sky Strife was no more.

Zack didn't really want to wait around after that, but Cid wouldn't let him ride his bike so they left Shera at the hospital while the large man dropped him home.

He didn't actually go into his apartment. Instead he did a u-turn once his coach was out of sight and headed back out onto the street. It was a long walk, probably too long to be on foot, but eventually he found himself in that old park where he and Cloud had gone so often. The boy had a weird OCD thing that made him run the length of the area almost every day, and Zack would come with him often either to run with him or just distract him in whatever fiendish way he could.

He sat there all night, not crying or even feeling particularly sad. He was just there. Him, all alone. No Sky, no Cloud… nothing but the grass reaching out into the landscape, and the blinking Skyline lying on top of it like a layer of concrete mold.

Alone.

Regretful.

His future, the future of a non-hero.

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Sephiroth held Cloud by the elbow as he led him again through the glossy hall of his house. Once they reached the living room he let the boy down on the couch and kneeled on one knee in front of him.

"What do you feel like eating?" He asked, resting his hand on the boy's thigh.

It was around lunchtime and Cloud had yet to eat anything that day. Now that the brunt of his illness had left, the boy needed sustenance in order to rebuild his strength, and Sephiroth was determined to provide it for him, whether he wanted it or not. He wouldn't have him fade to nothing for the sake of sulking.

"..." Cloud just stared back at him dully so he sighed, tilting his head to the side.

"Hmm, how about some cereal? Does that sound manageable?" He suggested, watching his silent charge who waited several long seconds before slowly moving his head to nod.

"Cereal it is then," he replied, glad that his question had actually been answered for once. "I'll be back shortly." He squeezed Cloud's leg briefly and then stood up and left for the kitchen.

Cloud curled in on himself, pressing his back as far into the arm of the couch as he could and wrapping his arms around his mid-section. He caught sight of his reflection in the television across from him. Gaia, he didn't even know himself anymore. Is that what he looked like? He was horrible, all skinny and shrunken looking. He looked like the people at the end of some horror movie, after they'd been abused and traumatized, cut and bleeding and pale with terror. Victims.

But that was exactly what he was now, wasn't it? He would never be a normal kid again, or a college student, a writer, artist. In the last few days since… his birthday, his mind had been reeling over the fact that everything was all gone; from now on, no matter what happened or where he went, he would just be a victim. He would be a person who had suffered one of the worst things there was to suffer. His body had been debased, ruined and used against his consent, so it wasn't his anymore. It was just something he was trapped in now. A casket of meat and veins and muscle. His name and everything with it was gone and there was only one word left in his life.

Rape.

Rape.

Rape.

Sephiroth's return to the room was for once welcomed, at least then his mind would have something to concentrate on except the bone-crushing depression. No, now he had a number of things to occupy his thoughts; fear, revulsion, sickness, loneliness, sadness.

"Here," the man handed him a deep porcelain bowl filled below the brim with wheat cereal and he took it slowly. When he looked down at the food he realized the bowl was shaking, no, not the bowl, his hands. They were shaking. He tried to calm himself, urge them to stop but they just wouldn't.

"How do you feel?" Sephiroth asked as he sat down beside him on the cushions, his heavy body making them dip. Cloud raised his eyes from where they were focused on the swirling motions of his spoon. He regarded his kidnapper in silence, this demon that turned so pale in the white morning light; a marble statue with two gems gashed into the face to serve as cold, emotionless eyes.

Sephiroth didn't seem perturbed by his study; he just clicked his tongue and leaned forward to brush his un-gloved fingers against his forehead.

"You're temperature is normal. Do you feel weak at all?"

Cloud shook his head.

"Is the head-ache gone?"

He nodded.

Sephiroth mumbled something before turning away from him. There was a few minutes of silence in which Cloud kept his eyes down on the bowl he was swirling the spoon around in, not yet taking anything into his mouth. The little golden spheres were turning the milk off-color, making his stomach clench in nausea.

Sephiroth tapped his index finger against his chin and contemplated his next words. He had to convey what had happened without causing an immediate panic, which would be highly difficult. It was hard for him to understand the devastation this news would cause for the boy because he had never lost a parent himself; he'd never had one to lose. Also, he felt that Sky's passing was something which should have been expected and something which could detach the boy further from his old life, so he was personally pleased by the news, hindering the empathy he ought to be required to display.

"Cloud."

The boy clinked his spoon against the bowl and then looked at him with dull, uninterested eyes. "Eat quickly, I have something to talk to you about once you're done." He certainly wouldn't feel like eating afterword's.

Cloud only ate a few spoonfuls before he said he was full. Sephiroth let it pass without comment both because the boy's appetite was still dwindling due to his illness and because he was anxious to tell the boy what had happened.

He took the bowl and placed it on the low table in front of them, then turned and regarded the other with a serious look. Cloud stared back at him, his hands wrung together on his lap and dark bags beneath his eyes.

"Cloud," he started in a low voice, moving his left hand to rest on the boy's knees.

Cloud's stomach was beginning to knot at the look he was receiving. Sephiroth always acted strange and cryptic when he was planning something that he wouldn't like and it terrified him. Then again, what could be worse than what had already happened? Going through it all over again?

"I have some bad news."

The words surprised him, simply because he hadn't been expecting them. He furrowed his brows and looked at the man in puzzlement. Sephiroth just stared back with that weird expression.

"This will upset you," he warned, squeezing his fingers around his thigh as though to comfort him. He knew nothing of the word. "And I want you to remain as calm as possible."

Sickness bubbled in Cloud's stomach, rising to his throat and forcing him to take a loud swallow.

"I'm afraid this concerns you're mother."

And he didn't want to hear anymore. He didn't want to hear what he knew the man was going to say. That was why he was looking at him the way he was.

"She suffered a very severe attack a couple of nights back," a short pause, "and I'm afraid she didn't recover from it… she passed on last night."

And there it was. The words that could never be taken back. The words that told him that he would truly never see his mother again, that that fateful morning was indeed the last time he would ever see her alive. Sky, his mother. His mom.

Gone.

He let out a breath, his chin falling to rest against his chest.

"How?" He whispered, squeezing his hands into fists. He hadn't really directed the question at Sephiroth, but the man answered all the same.

"She suffered a seizure that weakened her heart. Her body simply wasn't able to recover." It was said in a plain, emotionless voice. As though they were not discussing the death of a person. The most important person in his life.

The teen slapped his hands over both of his ears, shaking his head.

"Stop," he said desperately, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath.

No, it wasn't real. Sephiroth was lying. He was just trying to hurt him. That's what he did. He was always trying to hurt him.

"You're lying," he hissed, opening his eyes and looking at the man, letting all of his anger and confusion spill onto his face. The man stared back without saying a word.

"You're a liar," he cried again.

"I can assure you I'm not lying," Sephiroth murmured, pushing a tendril of hair back over his shoulder, "I think you know that."

"No, you- you're a liar. Why are you saying this to me? Why … LIAR."

"Calm down Cloud," A low, deadly tone now.

"N-" Cloud's breath left him, the realization of what had happened setting in like ice to his veins. He thought about his mom. She was so frail and weak, sick for so long. He knew that his kidnapping would kill her. Losing her son wasn't something she was able for now. The worry, the grief and the reporters hounding her every day. She wasn't able for that. Of course she had gotten worse. Of course she died. His captor wasn't lying, he was telling the truth. His mother was dead.

And it was Sephiroth's fault.

If he hadn't taken him, if he had just given up on whatever sick, fucked-up obsession he had and left him be then none of this would have happened. He could still be at home, taking care of her. She wouldn't have suffered all this stress and gotten sicker. It was his fault.

His fingernails bit into the palms of his hands until they drew blood.

"Why are you doing this?" He breathed out between heavy breaths.

Sephiroth slid his body closer to him, so that their legs were touching.

"You needed to know," he answered. Cloud shook his head.

"Why are you doing all of this to me? Why did you take me?"

_Sephiroth, I love you._

"That's irrelevant now." His kidnapper snapped, shaking his head.

"It's not," he argued back, "If you didn't take me none of this would be happening."

"Oh, come on now Cloud," the man said back, his voice high and patronizing as it so often was, "you know well your mother was ill. This would have happened eventually. You just couldn't accept that."

"No," the teen wasn't having any of his mind-games. He wasn't going to let the man twist and confuse everything he was thinking. "It wouldn't. You caused this."

"Tch," Sephiroth clicked his tongue and closed his eyes, as though he was trying to teach something to a dim-witted recipient and growing weary of it.

"She was sick Cloud. Dying," he said again, holding his hands out in front of him, "do you understand that?"

"Well," Cloud licked his lips, looking to his side and then back at the man, "even so… I should have been there with her."

"You're not a doctor, or a potion master. You wouldn't have stopped this."

"I'm her _son_," Cloud shouted in exasperation, giving him a disbelieving look. "Do you understand that? I'm her son. I should have been with her. Not here. I don't want to be here and I wouldn't have been here if you didn't fucking kidnap me."

"Enough," Sephiroth hissed, leaning forward and putting his hand on his shoulder. Cloud grit his teeth and jerked backwards, away from his hold.

"You have been left alone long enough," Sephiroth's voice conveyed the seriousness he felt about the topic. He didn't feel sympathy for the boy; he was trying to help him and was getting nothing but grief and insults in return. "I took you because she couldn't take care of you and I don't regret that."

"No," Cloud said, water beginning to gather at the corner of his eyes. "You don't regret anything. You just hurt and torture me and you don't care. You… don't care about anything."

"I care about you. And I cannot bring myself to lament my decision to bring you here. You were alone in that city. I rescued you."

"No, I wasn't alone. I had friends and a family. You took me away from them. If I'm alone its because of you," Cloud's voice was getting louder and louder, his temper rising again. Sephiroth would normally have already put a stop to this little outburst but decided that the boy needed to vent his frustration that morning, and it was somewhat refreshing to see that bit of life returning to him.

"I gave you a better life," he said for the hundredth time since his boy had come to be with him, hoping that repetition would engrave truth.

"What life?" Cloud snapped bitterly, "being locked in a room all day? Having no one to talk to or nowhere to go. Only getting out of there to be… What life?" His voice was starting to crack and he could feel a lump emerging in his throat.

_Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry_.

Sephiroth wasn't pleased at all with the insults, but he clenched his jaw and let him continue.

"What's wrong with you? How are you able to do this and try to justify it? Ev- everyone thinks I'm dead. And you… I have nothing now. You took away my hope. I have nothing now." Cloud dug his fingers into the skin above his eyes as his mind grew more hectic. Everything he wanted to say to the man was trying to come out at the same time and he hadn't enough breath for it.

"You're evil. You're a monster. You killed Clarence, he was innocent and you killed him for no reason. And now you've killed her?" His eyes widened and he looked up at Sephiroth in unspeakable horror.

"She was the most important person in the world to me?" He said desperately.

Sephiroth looked into the boy's puffy eyes, his expression becoming darker and his lips twitched downward for a moment. He shrugged his shoulders.

"Not anymore," he drawled, running his fingers along the back of the couch in such a relaxed manner he seemed to be in a different world than Cloud. How could he be like this? He had no conscience. He didn't feel one bit of remorse for what had happened.

"You're a monster," Sephiroth gave him a calm look.

"You're upset, I understand."

"You killed her," Cloud's body was shaking with tension and anger as he closed his eyes in resignation. Why was he surprised? Life meant nothing to this man. He would easily take any life he needed in order to get what he wanted. He knew this.

"You never thought anything of me killing thousands before. A hero, isn't that what you and every other pathetic being in Midgar thought I was? Why do you change your mind now Cloud?" There was no hint of anger in Sephiroth's voice; it was more condescending and smug, as though he was dealing with someone in a much lower intelligence field.

"It was my…mother…" Cloud shook his head, frustrated. "It…that was different." He managed weakly, knowing he was hanging himself with his words.

"Different," Sephiroth scoffed, pleased to see Cloud's resolve weaken. "How was it different.? Were the men I killed in Wutia not sons and husbands and brothers and fathers? Did their lives mean less than Clarence's or Seifers?" He saw his flinch and smiled inwardly.

"It was a war," he whispered.

"That makes it alright?"

"Yes, no, its… it still doesn't mean you can just kill people like that," Cloud's voice was soft and defeated now, he wasn't crying. He didn't have the energy to.

"Cloud. If it weren't for me there would be a lot more dead people in Midgar. I saved their lives and I can take them away if I wish. And I didn't kill your mother. Geostigma did. There is no cure for it."

"I should have been there."

For the longest time Cloud remained silent, his glum eyes staring stubbornly ahead. Sephiroth drummed his fingers along the back of the couch as he stared at the silent teen with a look of intense expectation on his face.

"Are you going to kill me?"

The small, whispered question was not what he had been expecting to hear. He didn't reply immediately, frankly at a loss for words.

"Don't say such ridiculous things," he snapped when he finally caught his voice. He wrinkled his brow and continued. "Everything I do is to ensure you are not harmed. I want you with me for the rest of my life." He put so much force into his words it strained his throat.

"You hurt me though," Cloud looked down at his wrists, "and you get so mad. You'll get sick of me one day and you'll just kill me." His voice was so monotone and resigned it made Sephiroth, for one weak instant, believe the words. But it was only an instant, because the idea was beyond obscene. He would _never _hurt this boy. _Never_. It was the way Cloud felt about himself that made him think like this, he didn't believe he was worthy of love or affection. Of course he would think this way. It would be a long time before Sephiroth could convince him otherwise.

But he inwardly chastised himself for taunting the boy. He had gotten sadistic perhaps, and resentful of the boy's distant attitude, so he baited him with something that he knew would hurt him. But he shouldn't have, Cloud was young and had just found out that he had lost his mother. He was devastated and people in that sort of grief often tried to blame others for their loss, it was natural. He was foolish for reacting to it; he should know better.

He took Clouds left hand in his and brought it towards his lips, big blue, dead eyes watching him.

"I only hurt you if I need to. It's always out of love Cloud. Never anger or hatred." He kissed each of the fingers separately. "I am sorry for what happened to your mother. If not for her then for you. I do not want to see you sad."

"I'm tired." Cloud muttered, pulling back his arm. He looked at his captor pleadingly and this time Sephiroth hadn't the heart to disappoint him. He needed some time to himself now anyway; he had to think over what had happened and adjust to it at his own pace.

"Okay."

Cloud insisted on walking the short distance towards his room without aid, and was glad when they finally reached the bookshelf disguised door.

He stood to the side numbly as he watched Sephiroth unlock the door slash bookshelf with a small silver key and then pull it out. It seemed such a normal, unimportant action but in reality it was the difference between freedom and captivity, his past and present.

Once the door was open Sephiroth turned towards him and placed a hand on the back of his neck. He leaned in and kissed his forehead, taking a few seconds there.

"I'll leave you to yourself for a while love," he murmured, "just relax, try to get some rest for a while. I'll bring you some food later."

Cloud didn't reply.

"Don't think on it too much now Cloud. You have to move on from this." He guided the blond in with a hand on his back. Cloud walked through the threshold, feeling the temperature drop a few degrees. He walked down the stairs numbly and once at the bottom he turned to see Sephiroth watching him.

The lights had yet to be turned on, so the only illumination came from the still open door. It shone like a spotlight on the boy, making his blue eyes sparkle like Canyon sapphires.

Cloud watched as the man slowly close the door. Like the last sunset he had ever seen or may ever see again, he watched the light slowly diminish, the final sight remaining a single green gem burnt into stone, burning into him, before his world became dark.

He fell to his knees with the brunt of the heavy blackness, one word floating in its mass.

Mom.

Mommy.

She was part of the darkness now.

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	27. XXVII

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

**This fan fiction contains dark, upsetting psychological and sexual themes so if you are not comfortable with that kind of thing then please don't read because I don't want to upset anyone.**

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_Sephiroth shifted his elbow against its rusted rest, peering out through the shadows at the scene lit up by the green bulbs looming overhead._

_It almost looked contrived. The lighting, the silence, the sheer idea of this abandoned playground in reference to the loss of innocence which Midgar was built upon. It really was the perfect place for his boy to be and he looked like an oil painted cherub in its midst._

_He was perfect, sitting there in the middle of the glumness, his small fingers holding onto the rusted links of the swing as he rocked himself back and forth softly with one foot on the ground, the squeaking sound breaking the silence with dots of chilling pitches._

_Yes, the whole scene would have fit together perfectly, if not for the one great flaw upsetting it._

"_Was it really that bad?" Zackary Fair. Eager, clingy, charming Mr. Fair. He let his narrowed eyes fall onto Cloud, who was looking up at his friend with a humorless smile on his face that didn't suit his features._

"_Were you not there?" The boy asked sarcastically. Zack cleared his throat._

"_There were a few…looks." Sephiroth hated the fact that despite his boy's bad mood, his admiration for the other still shone in his eyes as if he and not the city lights were the source of illumination on this night. _

"_Everyone was looking at me. All day. It was annoying," Cloud lowered his head again and used the ball of his foot to rock the swing. Zack, who was leaning against the vaguely green bar of the set, frowned at the boy's unhappiness. As if he really felt sympathy. Sephiroth internally scoffed. Teenagers. _

"_They were just being nosy. It's your first day back, they'll get over it fast," he watched Cloud shake his head, happy to see that the comforts weren't working. _

"_No, it wasn't just that. It's what they're all thinking. I don't blame them either, who __would fall for something like that? This mysterious person contacts me saying they're my father andI'm like 'yeah, it must be him. Who else could it be?'" The sentence would have been funny if not for the situation. Sephiroth was inclined to agree with the boy's assessment of his actions. Cloud had made everything too easy, trusting and obliging with only a small bit of suspicion. He had acted like the child he was._

"_Cloud," Zack's voice was hard and firm, reminding him very much of a scolding Angeal, "No one thinks you're an idiot. You just made a mistake that anyone could have made. They'll all move onto something new next week."_

"_Oh, like Seifer getting killed? No wait, that already happened and who had to be in the middle of it?" Sephiroth had never seen this bitter side of Cloud before, this side of his persona __**he**__ was responsible for bringing to the fore, and he didn't like it. It didn't feel organic. _

"_That wasn't your fault either," Zackary seemed less enthusiastic about that topic. Of course he did._

"_Well why… It's not…uh, whatever." Cloud leaned forward and covered his face with his hands, the chains held in the inner axis' of his elbows._

_It took every ounce of his self-restraint to stop himself from going over and ripping Zack Fair's ignorant head from his shoulders with his bare hands as he witnessed the boy walk towards his cherub and wrap his arms around his neck from behind._

_He pressed his teeth together, turning once on the spot while entreating the heavens to stop their games._

"_Come on buddy, it will get better. I promise," Zack was saying soft to the boy, smiling encouragingly. _

"_When?" Was the muffled, dry response._

"_Soon," the raven haired teen answered firmly and the General felt goose bumps emerge on his skin when he saw him place his chin on Cloud's head, and keep it there._

_But as often happened lately, he quickly began to feel foolish for his anger. What was he so upset about? He would be able to do all those things and more to Cloud in less than two months now; touch him and hold him and feel him to his heart fulfillment and beyond. He had already started on converting the basement, the walls had been soundproofed, the plumbing sorted, the furniture bought and the buckets of blue paint waiting to be used. Soon everything would be ready for his guest. Plans to take him to Modeoheim had to be arranged of course, but that would be easy for the General of one of the most corrupt organizations in the world._

_So they could have the boy all they wanted now. They're days with him were numbered, slicing slowly away to nothing. Soon he would be gone from their sight, out of their reach, and they'd never get him back again._

_Feeling his mood improve dramatically, he tuned back into to the boys' conversation._

_Zack managed to calm the boy down eventually, as he normally did with soothing words and jokes, and the two stayed talking for over an hour before deciding that it really was getting late._

"_Alright," Zack said while stretching his hands over his head, "let's do this thing." He walked over to his bike and began pulling on his gloves, stopping to hand Cloud a helmet before fixing the straps on his own. It was always amusing to watch Cloud stuff the head gear down over his obnoxious hair. _

"_Yeah, um I'm sorry for being so whiny. I just get a little overwhelmed with it all sometimes," Cloud pursed his lips and fiddled with the helmet in his hands._

_Zack seemed to be about to answer, some motivational nonsense Sephiroth guessed, but was interrupted by the ringing of his phone. He watched the boy pull the device out and then an unreadable look came over his face._

"_Tifa again?" He heard his boy ask. He didn't need trained hearing to pick up on the discomfort in the tone._

"_Yeah," Zack muttered, putting the ringing device back in his pocket._

"_You should answer." Sephiroth was bitterly conscious of the fact that __Cloud didn't mean his words. Sometimes his angel just had to act like a desperate little whelp. He was young._

"_Nah, it's probably nothing." Zack said again._

"…_alright."_

"...alright."

_Soon, they were both on the bike and speeding away, the rapid spinning of the wheels pushing dust into the air behind them._

_He decided to take his time following them back, hoping that by the time he reached the apartment complex Zack would have already left and he could spend some time watching his boy alone. He was back to Modeoheim in the morning and was anxious to make the last few hours in the city worthwhile. It was always a difficult thing to leave Cloud for these periods of time; he didn't like leaving him without any protection from the city for so long. But he didn't really have any other choice._

_He walked slowly through the streets of Midgar North-West, taking care to stay in the shadows and away from crowded areas. It wouldn't be a disaster if he were seen, but it easier to avoid it. The buildings set in over him like the fingernails of a clenching hand, closing him in with all the poison and decay, holding him to it._

_What was the point of it all? He wondered suddenly. Should it really be allowed to go on? Or would someone do a favor to the planet by eradicating the mound, clearing it away to expose the true life underneath._

_Perhaps, but that wasn't his duty. Not now anyway. _

_He had been walking for about ten minutes, his mind spinning through thoughts of this general nature, and was only two streets away from Briste Street when it came over him. _

_It, a disorder in his system. His enhanced senses began to tingle as the bell like beat pulsed through him, making his vision sway and blacken for seconds of disorientation as all of his external limbs lost feeling. _

_Startled, and agitated, he turned around on the spot several times, eyes manically searching over the black windows and endless alleyways until they fell upon what he'd been expecting to find._

_Magic._

_He stopped in the direction of where the bright green glow could just about be seen behind a scattering of walls and rooftops. He started walking towards it, his hands still clenching and unclenching as they dealt with the uncomfortable pins and needles cackling inside them. _

_The strength of the reaction told him that this was no novelty magic, which was strange as this side of the city was not known for any serious magic users. _

_The sensations became stronger the closer he got to the source, and his teeth began to ache as if metal particles were scraping against the nerves. Similarly his ears began to pain, his jawbone and the area around his eyes and temples... with an intensity he'd never felt before..._

_He walked through several different lane ways, climbed over walls where they offered shortcuts, his eyes always on the green miasma, until eventually he found himself standing in a small clearing._

_He didn't know what shocked him more then, the fact that there was a place like this in the urban world of Midgar, where hundreds of blossoming white flowers thrived on a healthy patch of buxom grass, or that the person standing in the middle of the flowers, a green glow emanating from her delicate hands, was the strange girl he'd come upon in the flower shop that day. _

_He squared his shoulders as she stared straight at him, her stunning eyes not showing even the slightest trace of fear, or surprise, at his presence._

"_Sephiroth," her voice floated into his ears with an eerie hum, and for a moment he was sure her lips hadn't moved. He shook the idea away._

"_You're a magic user?" He gave her a questioning, and perhaps dangerous, look. _

_"In some ways... though I feel it might be the other way around." she answered, her hands clapped together and the glow between them disappearing, setting the place in a darker hue._

"_Could I enquirer as to where you learned such a…specialized trait?" He drawled, ignoring her observation. The girl tilted her head in consideration._

"_The planet taught me," she answered, smiling down at the flowers as though they could feel it and were comforted by her attention. He was further confused by this. _

"_The planet?" His voice was full of ridicule and disbelief. She pushed her brown ponytail past her shoulder and tilted her head._

"_Yes," she replie; no anger or indignity in her voice. _

"_You taught yourself then?" _

"_No, the planet taught me," her insistence began to irritate him, who had never had time for circle-speakers._

"_The planet cannot teach. It is a thing, not capable of passing knowledge to anyone. We learn from the way of the planet, not from it directly."_

_He didn't like then, how the girl boldly took a step towards him, her eyes constantly wide and fixed on his, a contact very few were able to maintain before. _

"_I don't think you believe that Sephiroth. I think you know of the __**voice.**__"_

_His eyes widened as the words sunk in, turning cold._

"_How does a girl like yourself know such things?" He tried to keep his voice straight but his throat was tightening with every heartbeat._

_The beauty put her hands up to her chest and looked down, an uneasiness filtering through her persona. The first instance of a struggle within her character being revealed. _

"_What do you know of the voice of Gaia?" He repeated, walking a few steps closer to __her, refusing to be cowed. _

"_It wants me to plant flowers. More flowers. It wants me to bring beauty back into the world. Even if it is small. It thought me…thought me how to heal the ruined soil, how to produce life from death," the girl walked past him and held her hands out in front of her. In the moment she did so the ringing became so loud that he was forced to shut his eyes and count down the seconds until the tingling numbness died away, "I can summon rain, or sun. I can call creatures to me," she was saying, when he returned to himself. _

_Every word made it more obvious to him, everything she said proved it. It couldn't be though, it…was impossible. How could it be true?_

"_You're…"_

"_But it can be bad too," she continued, sounding like a child sharing a terrible secret. "I can sense sorrow, pain, anger. I can feel them as though they were my own experiences. I know of the corruption of the planet but can do nothing to stop it. I can… I can feel death. It's as though I've died a thousand times. I didn't want it. I used to beg for it to go away. I understand now though." _

"_My life is not mine. I am a vessel."_

"_You are an Ancient." Sephiroth watched as she turned towards him, her eyes glistening with tears that were almost crystal._

"_Yes, and you are a monster." Monster. Monster. The word sunk into his brain like fire, ruining him, breaking him. He wasn't a… he was a hero. He wasn't a monster._

_**Cloud**_

_He was good, he was a protector. He was human. He loved like a human._

_**Cloud**_

_He narrowed his eyes at her and for once, she returned the expression._

"_I see what you're doing. What you want to do. You should be stopped," her floating voice sounded different now. Power coursed through her gentleness, the earth stirred at her weightless feet._

"_Then why don't you? Why don't you tell?" He hissed, his fingers twitching for something. _

_Suddenly, as if it had never been there, all the anger disintegrated from her and again that sad, sorrowful girl was standing before him._

"_The planet won't allow it," she said, and there was a tightening around her mouth which revealed her displeasure at the fact. A girl reluctantly following the outdated rules of her mother. _

_Sephiroth saw the look of weariness ingrained into her features, realizing now that they were not, nor had ever been, calm. It became clear to him that this girl was just as broken as anyone else on this planet._

_Suddenly the realization of how similar they were struck him. They were both slaves, chained to a destiny that they both hated, that hurt them and trapped them. Others would call them heroes, envy them. Only they knew the price of being chosen._

_**Cloud**_

_He said nothing as he walked towards her. For once she looked uneasy, not in a spiritual sense but in a very human way, as he put his hand around her. An uncertain, young girl._

"_I understand," he whispered, slowly lifting his other hand to trace the curve of her bang as it swept across her chin. He'd only ever once seen eyes as green. "I am a monster. And we are the same."_

_She gasped as his lips met hers._

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The sound of his fists crashing against the wall was no contender to the scream that tore from his throat as Cloud let himself fall to his knees, his bloody hands making trails along the blue paint as they slithered down after him like a set of twin snails.

"Unnnnn, nn, nn" his whole body was shaking as he brought them towards his chest. Some of his fingers looked contorted; they were probably broken, and the flesh was shredding to bits, but he couldn't feel any of it so he didn't care.

With that thought in his mind he slammed his palms against the carpeted floor and roared again. He gritted his teeth for an uncomfortable moment before releasing the pressure and letting the sobs spill out of his body.

His throat burned and his body howled in pain with every wrack but he couldn't stop crying. He didn't think he would ever stop crying again. He had reached the peak of his emotional and physical limit and just had no energy left to hold it back. He had nothing.

"No," he shook his head and clamped his hands on his ears so he wouldn't have to hear himself cry, hear himself think. He couldn't think.

She was gone.

Who would want him now?

He thought about body that had been found. How everyone he cared about thought it was him. Maybe it was. Cloud Strife was dead now, he wasn't alive anymore. He didn't feel like himself anymore. He felt like a dirty, used, spoiled piece of meat, a hanging carcass waiting for every scrap of life drop from it. Yes, maybe Sephiroth really had done him a favor by planting that poor body. How would he ever be able to look them in the eye again? His mother...

No. His mother. It had... his mother wouldn't be there. It had already killed her.

It had destroyed them both.

He bent his body the whole way over until his forehead rubbed against the carpet. He could never go back to her. She was gone. He was never going to see his mom again. Even if he were saved now it was just too late. It was too late... he could never go back to her.

His whole lower body throbbed with each heartbeat, reminding him again and again what had happened. He couldn't escape it. It would always be with him now. Sephiroth would always be with him. H-he could feel him. He could still feel him inside of him, he could feel his hands on his skin, burning him. Trying to possess every part of him, trying to make them one. He could taste him, his tongue shoving itself down his throat.

While she'd been dying.

"Agh," he opened his mouth in a dry heave as he got up on all fours. His brows furrowed in misery as the memories assaulted him repeatedly, making him heave like he had a bad case of food poisoning. This had been happening every half hour since he had been brought back to the room that morning. It was strange, because in the days after the thing had happened his was able to keep it from his mind enough to make himself sane. It must have been a mixture of the shock and sickness that kept him calm then, but now it was all flooding back to him in repeated waves, and coupled with what he had heard that morning it was all tormenting him to his core.

His mom...

His dreams had even been peaceful at first, nonsensical harmless images with no real meaning, but then they started getting strange. Lamps started turning into windows, it started snowing on the dinner table, the dream catcher turned everything dark. His whole world had turned into a room. A huge, dark bedroom with a snowy window. Someone was screaming in there, crying and pleading. They were dying, they were being killed. He couldn't find them, he couldn't stop it. He couldn't stop it, all he could do was watch and listen. Then he heard the laughing. The deep, rumbling laughter that shatters souls.

_Sephiroth I love you._

"I hate you," he shouted, getting up on his knees and throwing his head towards the ceiling. "I HATE YOU."

His nostrils flared as frustration piled in his chest. With another throaty howl he stood up ran over to the stairs. He closed his eyes as little jolts still came with each movement but it didn't stop him from placing his foot firmly on the bottom step, then the second one and then the third. Nine burning steps later he found himself facing the solid mass of wood that confined him to this suffocating nightmare.

He clamped his lips together and exhaled through his nose as adrenaline gathered in his body.

"Sephiroth," he was surprised by the force of his own voice, but didn't think on it long enough and just took a deep breath and yelled again. "Sephiroth."

His fist rose and slammed into the door.

"Sephiroth," Why wasn't he being answered? He was going to be answered. He wasn't going to be ignored anymore. He wasn't going to be patronized. He wasn't going to be treated like a child.

"Sephiroth," He roared, slamming both of his palms against the thick oak as hard as he could "Sephiroth. Answer me."

He had to answer him. He had to. He had to be near. He couldn't be anywhere else, he couldn't be living his life like a normal person, he couldn't be doing his job, talking to his co-workers about mundane things, drinking coffee, laughing, enjoying life. He had to be in the house, stuck here like Cloud was. It wasn't fair; Sephiroth had done this to him so he couldn't leave him here alone. HE COULDN'T LEAVE.

"Sephiroth," he strained his voice to its highest volume, bringing his fists down again and again on the solid wood.

"Sephiroth," he was getting out of here today. He was going home. Enough was enough. This was madness. There was nothing else this man could do to him now. He had…raped him. Rape. Rape. Rape. There was nothing worse than that. He had to be freed. He was going to be free.

"Sephiroth."

His palms pushed at the door in misguided frustration.

"Sephiroth, answer me."

He tasted blood in his throat.

"Sephiroth."

The anger was building in his stomach. He couldn't stand it. He felt- he felt…

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He felt incredible.

Sephiroth stretched his hands above his head and brushed his fingers against the cool headboard. He inhaled through his nose, wishing that the air was as perfumed as it was on that night. It had been so hard to stay away from the boy, his new lover. He wanted to teach Cloud more about the art of sex, show him how much there was to enjoy in another's body. He wanted to touch him again, to feel him and hear him as he took his body. Doing it once didn't diminish his longing; it made it stronger. When one tastes that first bite of their favorite food, they don't want to throw it away; they want to consume it entirely, again and again. But the boy had been sick, and in no way able for anything… rigorous, so Sephiroth had to make do with memory. Reliving the night over and over again.

He went up to his room that night, after he had left his love to himself, and the minute he stepped into the room his memory of the night became vivid. He could hear the moans and the rustling of the sheets; feel the hot skin beneath his own. He could taste Cloud's salty skin, his sweat, his mouth. It was all contained within these walls.

"Ungh," he groaned, moving his hips to stop the friction of the blue sheet against his erection. He had been so tempted to leave his bed as it was, but Cloud's virgin blood patterned those white sheets, and therefore they were special. The sheets were to be preserved, like so many pointless artifacts of the past worlds, only with more meaning and depth than anything before them. He would take them out, from time to time, and look at them, smell them, trace his fingers over the red stains. They would turn brown eventually, but it didn't matter, because they were what they were. It was what it was.

He moved his hand from where it was tangled in his hair and stretched it across the pillow. Judging by dimming light shining through the closed curtains he figured it was time to get up and check on his boy, who he hadn't seen since that morning, where he'd shared the terrible news.

He would need to be comforted. But it was difficult when Sephiroth felt nothing really but glee for what had happened. Now his boy could really move on. The one true attachment had been severed, the umbilical cord releasing the infant to better hands.

With renewed vigor the muscular man pushed himself up and off the bed. His bare feet padded across the carpet and walked over to the dressing gown hanging from the wall. He took it down and shrugged it on before going to the bathroom to relieve and wash himself a bit with cool water.

Working out a knot on the back of his neck, the tall man made his way out of the room and down the stairs. He was about to turn towards the kitchen to prepare something for his boy, as he hadn't eaten since the morning, but then impatience got the better of him and he decided to check on Cloud first. Reasoning that he wasn't in the best form that morning and that he would want to select something himself, but knowing he really just had a childish urge to see his love. Now.

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"It was a lovely service."

"At least she's not suffering now."

"The two of them are together now."

Yes, people truly knew how to be annoying at funerals. Zack clasped his hands together in front of him as he watched the small gathering of people exchange condolences and epitaphs. He was leaning against a table, only lightly because if he put all of his weight on it would probably fall over, ruining all the pastries and sandwiches.

He clicked his tongue and straightened up when he saw Tifa maneuver herself through the black-clad bodies and approach him.

"Hi," she said in that soft, kindly voice of hers. She gave him a gentle look and placed her hand on his arm. "How are you doing now?"

"M'okay," he mumbled, his arm stiffening where she was touching it. "S'not like it was my mother." When he saw her face become pinched for a second he regretted his words. "Sorry, I didn't mean."

"Don't worry, I know what you meant," she said, waving a pale hand in front of her. "Anyway, we're all sitting at a table in the other room, are you coming in?" The whole gang had attended the funeral, Yuffie, Reno, Leon and everyone else. Zack had sat with them during the service but then broke away for a while to be by himself.

"Actually, I think I'm just gonna leave," he said, bringing his finger up to tug at the collar of his shirt. He hated wearing suits, especially when it was made from sickness and grief. "Not in the mood, y'know."

He could see that she was unhappy about his answer, and frustrated that she couldn't press the issue, but didn't delve too far into her reasoning lest he get ahead of himself. Instead he just assured her that he was okay and that she should go back, which she did a few moments later.

Zack watched her go and then looked around the room one more time. Gaia, this was the reception of Sky Strife's funeral. He was here now, and Sky was gone. It was all so wrong. He had pictured this moment for years, because they all knew it was inevitable, but had never, ever imagined that he would be here without Cloud. It was ridiculous. Cloud was supposed to be here, and he was supposed to take care of him throughout the whole thing. Not like this, where he was the one receiving the condolences.

He scratched at the side of his head for a moment, feeling an ache form on his temple. Entirely sick now of this room and its buzzing voices and stuffy heat, he pushed away from the table and made his way to the exit of the hall.

The air was cool on his face and he breathed it in as he stepped out onto the sidewalk. Where would he go now? Home? Angeal had left straight away after the service, for work, so he could go back to the apartment and have some peace and quiet for a while without the looks and systematic phrases. Then again, the prospect of spending another day with nothing but his own, thoughts was so abysmal that it was hard to face.

Deciding that for a while he would try to clear his head by taking a walk around the city, he had only taken a few steps to the left when someone called out his name.

"Zackary," he turned a saw a woman he didn't recognize waving back at him. She was older, dressed in a floor length black dress with a lace skirt at the bottom. Her mousy hair was tied back into a tight bun, revealing an aged but attractive face. Zack had seen her at the funeral, but didn't know who she was.

"Yeah?" He asked, turning fully to face her. She walked over to him and gave him a smile.

"I just wanted to say how sorry I am about everything," she said, reaching out a hand which he clasped and shook. "I'm Elmyra Gainsborough."

"Gainsbrough?" He mumbled, releasing her hand. "You were a friend of Sky's?"

"Yes, I was. Though I didn't see her often," the woman placed her hand on the curve of her hip and let out a soft breath. "It's just awful, for the both of them."

"Oh," something clicked in Zack's head, "Do you have a daughter?" Cloud had once mentioned something about a weird girl he knew… and Zack was sure it was something Gainsborough. The boy had said that she unnerved him sometimes, even though she was nice.

"Oh," he was confused when the woman's whole face became pinched, as though she was in pain. "Yes, I-had a daughter. Her name was Aerith,"

His stomach dropped.

"Oh, I'm sorry," he said quickly, taking a step closer to her, "I didn't mean t-"

"It's okay," she replied, reaching out to place a very soft hand on his arm. "You didn't know."

There was an uncomfortable moment of silence then and Zack couldn't help but ask.

"What happened?" That was probably a bad question, an awful one. The woman didn't seem perturbed by it at all though, and she just ran one of her fingers over the back of her other hand as she answered.

"She was murdered," She said, and Zack could hear the calm anger in her words. He so focused on this that it took him a minute to grasp what she had said.

"Gaia," he said, stunned. He had expected her to say she'd been sick, or in an accident. "did they find who did it?"

"No," Elmyra replied, shaking her head. "Not at all. I found her that night, it happened at night, in one of her gardens in the city, but there was no evidence as to who had done it."

He felt guilty then, disgusted, for the contented feeling that passed through him as he heard these words. Here was a woman who had suffered something as terrible and life-shattering as he had, who had lost a daughter and knew all about the sadness, the anger and helplessness it meant to be left in the dark about who'd caused it. Perhaps she was worse off, because she knew for certain her child was dead, she had seen her body buried and returned to the life-stream and now she had no hope. And it was so damn, terribly perfect to come into contact with such a kindred spirit that all he could do was relish in the sad misery of the fact.

"Anyway, I just felt the need to say hi to you. From what Sky told me you were a friend to the family, and you were with her when she passed," she brought the black diamond purse she had been holding to her side and clicked it open as she spoke. "I can see how upset you are by everything. You really care, and I admire that."

"They were like my family," he admitted, looking back at the door to the hall. "I've known them both most of my life. More than I know my own parents. I actually thought… Cloud was gonna live with us when this happened. I mean he had no other family so he…" he stopped talking when he realised he was rambling.

"Of course," she replied, her eyes focused on where her hand was searching through the small bag. "You're tied to them. It's no different than family. I would know. The lifestream doesn't depend on blood, it's made from spiritual ties. The soul. That's why you feel the way you do. You're linked."

He took the words in, never one for philosophical discourse. Now he found them comforting, more so than anything else anyone had said to him in a while.

"Anyway," she went on, her voice rising higher as she pulled something out of the bag and clasped it shut. She held out the hand towards him and Zack could see a small piece of pink ribbon clutched between her pale fingers.

"This is for you. It's just a token of comfort. It used to be hers," her smile went dreamy for a moment, "she would want you to have it."

"Uh," he said, straightening his shoulders as he looked at the small article. "I don't… you should keep it," he felt a bit uncomfortable with this. He didn't even know the girl... to take something that was hers...

"It's only a piece of the whole thing. I have others at home. I won't take no for an answer," her voice went playfully firm for a moment as she pushed it towards him again. After a few more attempts at dissuading the woman he eventually conceded.

She placed the ribbon in his callused hand, and the moment she did he felt a strange, tingling feeling flutter through his body, travelling up his veins. He blinked, shuddering for a second before looking back at the woman, who in turn was staring at him intently.

"Well, I'm going to go back inside. Take care of Yourself Zack, and keep that close. It might just help."

He felt disoriented as he nodded and said goodbye to her. His head was like mush and his whole body felt strange, light it had lost all his weight and was slowly pulsing to a base playing deep in his core. He wondered momentarily if he was going to pass out, but it didn't happen.

He held the small ribbon between his index finger and thumb, lifting it so it dangled in front of his face.

"Strange," he mumbled. Then the item was stuffed unceremoniously into his pant pocket and he decided that going home and being by himself for a while wouldn't be so bad.

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The key hung, as it always did, on a chain around his neck and instead of taking it off Sephiroth simply leaned his head forward until the little chain had enough length to reach the lock. He twisted the key inside the little hole until he heard the click and then pulled away, bringing the case with him.

"Cloud!"

He stepped back in statement when the small body fell through the opened doorway, falling palm first onto the ground at his feet. Utterly caught off guard, he watched in confusion as Cloud took several fast breaths, stretched out on the floor like a lizard, and then looked up at him.

The look on the boy's face could only be described as hysteria. His eyes were wide, glazed and smoldering all at once, his mouth was opened slightly, his sharp teeth clenched together, setting his whole jaw in a shaking line. His usually pale cheeks were puffy and red, soaked with tears that were still falling.

But it was his hands, not his face that caught his attention.

"Cloud," he hissed in alarm, bending down to take one of the bloodied limbs to examine it better, but as he reached for it the boy pulled back sharply.

"No," he snapped, holding the hands towards his chest and glaring at his captor with as much venom as he could.

Sephiroth felt worry losing out to amused anger as he stared back.

"Cloud," he said calmly, "haven't we moved past this?"

"No," the teen shouted this time, breathing heavily. "I'm not, its…" His throat kept closing and it was hard to breath. He couldn't get the words out properly. He moved his hand back against the wall and began to pull himself into a standing position.

Sephiroth followed him up.

"Come on," he said softly, hoping to brush off the boy's temper easily, "let's go to the kitchen. Have some..."

"No," the boy's brisk reply ruined any chance of peace. "No, I'm not going to the kitchen. I'm going home."

"Excuse me," Sephiroth squared his shoulders and tilted his head to the side. Cloud gritted his teeth.

"I'm going home," he said again, bringing his eyes up towards the other's. "Now."

When his captor began his biting laughter it cut into Cloud's spine with the intensity of a heated knife

"Stop," he said lowly, but the man continued chuckling. "STOP."

The shout echoed in the large hallway, silencing everything else. Sephiroth closed his mouth and looked at him with a flat expression.

"I want you to leave me go," Cloud couldn't keep the emotion from his voice but was pleased with the strength in it.

Sephiroth actually found the boy's little stand quite endearing, and even thought he was threading on impudence he wasn't doing anything to really anger him. Yet.

"You know the answer," he said calmly.

"No," Cloud fisted his hands together, "I can't stay here. I have to leave."

"Cloud-"

"It's not fair. You can't keep someone locked up like this. It's…not healthy." Cloud wouldn't give the other a chance to interrupt him. He wouldn't be fooled or manipulated by the man. He knew what he wanted. "I'll die if I stay here. You say you love me. If you do then let me go. Don't keep me here, away from everyone I love. I can't… Leave me go."

Sephiroth saw no logic to the words, nothing to alter his belief that he was doing what was best for the boy. Cloud was young. Too young to know what was good for him? It wasn't his fault, he was in grief.

"I'm protecting you."

"Gaia," the teen bit out, throwing his head back and grinding his teeth. "You're not protecting me. You're the one I need protecting from."

Ice seemed to gather in Sephiroth's body while Cloud took a few calming breaths and looked back towards the man with devastation shinning in his red-rimmed eyes.

"Do you even think about me?" His voice fell to a whisper, his bloodied fingers playing with his sleeves. " Do you have any idea what it's like? To be locked in a room, day after day. No one to talk to. Not being able to see my mom or my friends. It's awful…I-" he cut himself off, his own words stirring his emotions strongly. He sniffed as tears began to collect in his eyes but kept visual contact with his tormentor. "I can't do it anymore."

Sephiroth didn't say anything for several long seconds; he just stared at the weeping boy while clicking his jaw from side to side. Eventually he took a step forward, morphing his features into the softest look he could muster. To Cloud's credit he didn't move, even when the taller man placed his hands on either side of his neck, his thumbs meeting under his chin.

"I do understand," Sephiroth whispered, "I know what it's like to feel isolated, to feel alone. I spent my whole life on my own, day after day, since I was a child. That word…family, it means nothing to me." He jerked his head to the side in emphasis, as if he were discarding the notion, before continuing. "I never even realized how alone I was or how little I had, until I found you..."

Cloud felt goose bumps prickle his skin at the change in the other man's voice.

"Whatever you think you feel now, it's nothing to how you felt back there. Don't pretend otherwise."

"I wasn't pretending," Cloud said quickly. He brought his hands up to the ones around his neck. "I wasn't pretending. You're making that up. I loved them. And now I'll never see her again. You took that away from me. "

"No," Sephiroth smiled, his hands pushing the boy's away and sliding into his hair. "You were unhappy. I saw you. You used to cry, I watched you in your room. You were never happy there. That's why you believed I was your father so easily."

"Stop twisting everything," the boy cried, jerking out of the hold and clapping his hands over his eyes, "stop analyzing me. I don't want to hear it anymore. I just want to leave."

The General clicked his tongue at his captives denial, letting a smirk play on his face.

"I'm not twisting anything," he said, "I'm trying to show you what you won't let yourself see. You hated it there. You wanted to leave. You reached out to Basch because you saw it as an opportunity to escape," Sephiroth knew he wasn't being truthful in everything he said; it wasn't as cut and dry as he was making it appear. He believed that Cloud was unhappy and alone, but he loved those people also, and that fact almost drove him to insanity, salted his words.

Cloud ground his back teeth together as his fists pushed painfully into his temples. No, no, he wasn't going to let himself be manipulated. He was going to be strong. He wasn't going to be afraid.

"Stop it. Just…I don't want to hear about it. About any of it. I want to leave. Today."

Sweat was pouring out of his skin, his head was pounding and his bones were shaking, but sheer determination drove his voice to be as strong and firm as it could be. He took his hands away from his head and looked up at the man. To his dismay Sephiroth didn't even look fazed, not angry at all. He was just brushing him off, like he always did. It drove him crazy.

Sephiroth clicked his tongue and adjusted the front of his robe.

"Enough of this," he sighed, "I'm not going to waste time talking about nonsense. I understand that you're very upset. So let's just go into the kitchen and try to relax."

"It's not nonsense!" Cloud cried, "it's reality. You can't keep me here anymore, pretending that I'm nothing. I'm a person. I'm no- I'm not a toy. I can't stay here." His emotions were literally flying from his body to his mouth. He kept switching from angry and controlled to sad and a wreck. It was all too much. His mind wasn't able for it.

"Let me go," he whispered, "Just let me leave. Please."

There was silence for a few minutes after that, but when the next word was spoken Cloud felt his stomach sink to the floor.

"No."

He looked up into the harsh eyes of his captor, a sick feeling spreading through his torso.

"No?" He repeated; death in his voice.

"You're not leaving today Cloud. You're never leaving. I've told you this already," Sephiroth shook his head, as though he were a school teacher trying to explain a lesson to a distracted child.

"What else do you want?" The boy's reply was equally as exasperated. "You took everything you wanted from me. Why keep me here now?"

"Took everything?" The man questioned, walking closer to the teen again. He stopped when his chest was just inches from Cloud's face.

"You know…" Cloud said lowly, not comfortable with where the man was going with this. He tried to move but his back hit the wall.

"No," Sephiroth whispered sarcastically, finding himself suddenly desperate to hear Cloud talk about the night, to hear it acknowledged. "What were you talking about? What did I take?"

Cloud sighed and turned his face towards the floor. This wasn't what he wanted to talk about. He hated the way the man made everything so difficult.

"I just want to go home. Why won't you just let me go home?" He whispered with his eyes closed.

"Ah," he yelped seconds later when both his arms were caught and he was shook not too roughly.

"Tell me. What did I take?" Sephiroth hissed, his eyes shining with manic interest.

"You know. Why are you making me say it?" Cloud shouted back.

"Say it," his kidnapper ordered, tightening his hands and bringing him closer to his face. Cloud had to stand on his toes to reach.

"Stop," he turned his face to the side. He wasn't able for this now. Everything Sephiroth was doing was bringing back uncomfortable memories. The smell, the breath on his face, the voice. He was starting to feel light headed. "Stop." He repeated.

"Say it," Sephiroth ignored his pleas.

"S-sex," Cloud whispered with his eyes closed. "We had sex."

Sephiroth relaxed his hold and smiled. Yes, they had sex. He had sex with Cloud Strife. He had been inside Cloud Strife. They had been one. Feeling a rush of emotion, he moved his arms to circle the boy and pressed him to his chest.

Cloud closed his eyes and mouth and let himself be held.

"Yes we did. And it was perfect, but that doesn't mean that it's over, that I don't want you anymore," Sephiroth kissed the top of the blond head, taking in the scent of his hair afterwards. "I don't just want you for that. Don't you dare suggest such a thing _ever_ again."

Cloud stayed silent.

Sephiroth pressed the boy harder to himself for several long minutes. Eventually he pulled back and looked down at him.

"Come on, we'll fix your hands up and see about food," he offered, taking the boys bleeding hand.

Cloud nodded and they began walking through two different hallways and towards the kitchen.

"You've hurt yourself, foolish boy," there was no malice in Sephiroth's mumbled admonishment as he studied the hand in his grip as they walked, tilting it this way and that to uncover new bruises and scratched skin.

Clouds heart was beating fast and the closer he got to the kitchen door the more he started to sweat. He twitched his fingers in the man's hold, trying to get a clear view of how slack it was. He took a breath and geared himself.

Sephiroth had just pushed the white door to the kitchen open when he felt a sudden coldness over his left hand. Turning quickly, he saw Cloud walking backwards, his previously captured hand held to his chest and his eyes wide and unmoving as they stared at him.

"What are you doing?" He asked in annoyance, utterly irritated that the boy wasn't finished acting up.

Cloud looked down at the floor, opening his mouth slowly. He then clamped his jaw shut and as quickly as he possibly could, turned and began running down the hall.

Sephiroth shook his head, rolling his eyes towards the ceiling before following the boy. His long legs making it possible for him to catch up without exerting himself.

Cloud could barely see anything in the panic, but he knew the door was somewhere in front of him and he pushed his body harder to reach it, knowing he had less than three seconds to get the it open and get out. He didn't know what he was doing; his mind wasn't comprehending the fact that it was all pointless. All he knew was he needed to leave. He needed to get out, away from that man. He had to escape.

Sephiroth smirked as he watched the boy crash into the front door with a loud thud and begin to clumsily get it open. He was about to open his mouth to tell the boy to stop acting ridiculous when he saw something that surprised him.

It opened.

Ah, he hadn't locked it the night before...

He sighed as he watched the small form disappear thought the threshold, coaxing his body into a faster gait as he headed after his insolent charge.

Cloud gasped when the cold air blasted into his face, burning his throat as he took in big gulps of air. He didn't stop running, even though his eyes were frantically trying to take in the surroundings through the heavy wind and snow. This was outside? It didn't look right. It was all white. Everything was white; the sky, the ground, the trees. He was outside though. For the first time in how long? He was outside.

The cold, or the emotion, made his eyes water as he ran further into the white matrix. His feet were only protected by his stockings and already stung intensely, all the way up to his shins, but he didn't care. He could hear the air screaming in his ears, the snow crunching beneath his feet. It felt strange; so different to the room he had been confined to. It felt real. He held his hands out to catch the snow as it blew towards him, his bloody fingers closing around it.

A smile had just made its way to his face when he felt the wind knocked out of him.

"Hhngh," he grunted as he was pulled back by an arm around his waist. He stumbled backwards and knocked his head against something solid. "Wha-" he moaned, looking upwards.

Sephiroth stared down at him with a look that might have frozen him from the inside out if he wasn't in such a dazed state of mind. He gripped onto his arm and with one jerk, turned him around to face him.

Cloud's head was spinning but as his vision cleared he realized what had happened. He had been caught, and even though he should have expected it, shouldn't have been surprised, he still felt devastated

"No," he gasped, trying to pull himself away. Sephiroth's grip on his arm tightened but instead of letting it scare him he just pulled harder, moving his entire body around and trying to gain purchase by digging his bare feet into the snow. The adrenaline prevented him from feeling it now. "Let go. Get off."

Sephiroth grit his teeth and looked back towards the house, preparing to just drag the screaming boy back inside before he caught an illness. His mind changed, however, when a small palm smacked into his mouth, causing him to let out a growl and release the boy completely.

Cloud wasn't expecting to be let go so quickly and as a result his balance was lost and he stumbled face first into the snow. "Ah" he gasped when his chest and chin collided with the sludgy ice. He sputtered and scrambled to get up on his hands and knees but the wind was making it hard. It felt like he was being stabbed repeatedly with glistening shards of glass, in the chest, in his stomach, his knees, his cheeks...

"Is this what you want?" The voice behind him shouted through the bellowing wind. He pursed his lips, keeping his eyes towards the ground.

Sephiroth pushed his hair back and held out his hands. "Is it? Do you want me to leave you out here? Well?"

Cloud swallowed thickly, "I just want to go home," he shouted over the wind.

"Hah," Sephiroth spat, jerking his head to the side, "do you actually think that you could? Do you have any idea where you are? You wouldn't last a half an hour out here."

"I don't care," Cloud shouted back, his body was losing its high and he was beginning to feel the effects of the snow against his exposed skin. "I don't want to be here anymore. I want to leave."

"Well I don't want you to leave," Sephiroth snapped, walking towards him until his own bare feet were beside Cloud's hands. "And that means that you won't be leaving, because I am stronger. I have the power. You do what I say, when I say it." his eyes were wide and his chest rose and fell in great rumbles.

Cloud had heard the words before, Sephiroth was always emphasizing his superiority, but they were really stinging at that moment. It could have been the pain he was feeling in his limbs from the burning ice, or the misery of his situation, but right now he just couldn't deal with it. He slowly got to his knees and turned to look up to the source of his torment, the wind slapping the side of his face like an icy hand.

"Why are you like this?" He swallowed and closed his eyes for a second then opened them again. "Why do you do this?"

Sephiroth exhaled through his nose as he stared down at the boy. Why was he like this? What kind of question was that? He was like this because he was in love. Why else? He wasn't mad or dangerous or wrong. It was normal. Everything he was doing was just to keep his love safe and with him. It was normal.

Not comfortable with his own answer or the darker implications of the question, the General ignored it and instead bent down to the boys level. This had gone on long enough and he knew Cloud couldn't stay out in the freezing cold any longer.

"Come on," he said, reaching out towards a shaking shoulder. Cloud jerked away but the he just reached forward and pulled him towards him and standing them both up. He lifted the faintly squirming teen from the ground with a grip around his waist and started back towards the house.

"Let's get you inside," he whispered into the boys snow dotted hair, "let's get you warm."

Cloud gave up trying to resist as he was pulled to his feet by Sephiroth. He gazed back towards the area ahead of him, barely making out the hills and sky through the thick air. Was that freedom? Or was it just another form of imprisonment? He would never survive it. Did it even matter? He wouldn't get a chance to find out because Sephiroth wasn't careless and would never give him the opportunity.

Get him warm? There was no heat in this hell, the flames burned cold, and the blood that spilled over the floor and walls was as pale as Sephiroth's breath as he pulled him back beneath the rooftop of his demise.


	28. XXVIII

**Oh my god the response to the last two chapters has been so amazing. I can't explain how nice it is to hear your words of encouragement and what you think of the fic so far. It inspires me to write quicker. Thanks so much everyone, and again I'm so sorry for the massive gaps between updates, there are no excuses...**

**I hope you enjoy this! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

**This fan fiction contains dark, upsetting psychological and sexual themes so if you are not comfortable with that kind of thing then please don't read because I don't want to upset anyone.**

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_"Slow down __Cloud!"_

_The excited boy raced through the apartment, ignoring his mother's chastisement as he ran through the hallway that led to the front door. He had to dig his feet into the floor in order to prevent himself from slamming into the wood when he finally got to it, making the front mat crumple up like the wobbly lines he'd practiced in school that day._

_His small fingers fumbled with the door handle until it clicked and he could pull it open._

"_Zack!" He beamed at the boy who was standing out on the front steps. Zack was his best friend; he was nearly ten years old! _

"_Hey," the boy smiled back, placing a hand on his hip and using the other to wave. "Are you ready?" He looked past the blond and into the hallway._

"_Yeah, I have everything right here," the blond boy nodded, bending down to pick up a blue rug sack with a Sky Pirate design on the front. He was just putting the strap over his shoulder (only one shoulder because that was cool) when his mom walked out into the hallway. _

_Zack smiled at the woman as she came towards them, a grin plastered on her freckled face. Her blond hair was tied in a loose ponytail around on the top of her head and a few curls fell around her face, she was wearing her blue painting shirt over her normal clothes which meant that she was working._

"_Hello Zack," she greeted warmly, placing a hand in top of his head and ruffling his already messy hair. _

"_Hey miss Strife. You look pretty today," he grinned, a small blush erupting on his chubby cheeks. He didn't really understand why he had to say things like that, but Angeal said it was polite. Angeal was always right. And Miss Strife **was** really pretty. _

"_Well thank you, young man," Sky chuckled, giving him a quickly pat on the cheek. "You're not so bad yourself." Zack smirked, holding his T-shirt out from its body._

"_It a Vagnagun," he indicated towards the large insect-like creature decorating the front of the material. "Major cool. Dad sent it to me last week. I have a bunch of others too. Like War Mech, Griever…um, and Yaizmat," he grinned when Cloud looked at him with wide eyes._

"_You're so lucky," the other boy gushed, honestly envious. He wanted cool T-shirts like that. All his mom ever bought him were kids' stuff like the blue sweater he had on now. He should be able to pick out his own stuff. He was almost seven years old! "It's really cool," he said, reaching out to touch the pattern._

"_We'd better go. Angeal is waiting out in the car," Zack looked up at Sky who looked past him towards the black jeep parked in the lot. _

"_Yeah," Cloud smiled, suddenly completely forgetting about the T-shirt. _

"_Okay," Sky exclaimed, clapping her hands together before putting them in front of her mouth. "Time for the big sleep-over." She pulled her hands away and bent down in front of her son._

"_Momm- Mom," Cloud groaned when she placed her hands on his arms. Zack let out a snigger which made him grow even more flustered. None of Zack's others friend's moms ever did this probably._

"_Now Cloud I packed your pajamas and toothbrush, don't forget to brush your teeth," she gave him a pointed look. "and if you feel like coming home just tell Angeal. He won't mind."_

_Cloud's mouth fell open at the implication of what his mother was saying. If he got scared? He wouldn't get scared. He had been looking forward to this sleepover all week. He had never stayed at a friend's house before and certainly wasn't going to ruin his one chance. She just wanted him to come home._

"_Okay," he rolled his eyes, trying to pull away from her. _

"_Oh," but the woman succeeded in hugging the small, utterly embarrassed, boy to her. Tears gathering in her eyes, though the display was partly in jest. "My little Cloudy, your first night away from me!"_

_Cloud couldn't believe his mom was doing this to him. In front of Zack! He was going to kill her when they were alone._

"_Jeesh," Zack raised his eyebrows and rolled his head the other way. The action embarrassed the smaller boy more and with renewed vigor he wiggled out of his mother's death hold and stepped a safe distance away from her._

"_Let's go. Quick," he hissed to Zack, rushing past him and out the door. _

"_Bye Miss Strife," Zack said before turning to follow the fleeing boy._

"_Goodbye Zack. Have fun. Take care of him." Sky blew the boys a kiss and watched them walk down the steps._

"_I will." _

"_Uh, she's so annoying." Zack watched his friend place both hands on top of his head as he strapped his seat belt around himself._

"_At least she cares. My mom wouldn't even notice if I went on a sleepover," he grumbled back. Cloud shot him a look._

"_Lucky."_

_"He wouldn't have gone there for no reason. He was looking for somet- alright, fine. I'll be there to look it over myself in the morning. We'll figure out what he's up to, and see if we can get him to come in. Tomorrow then.__" _

_Angeal, in the front of the car, pulled the phone away from his ear and clicked it shut fiercly, then turned around in his seat and smirked back at the two boys._

"_Hello Cloud. All ready for the big night?" He asked the blond who nodded._

"_Yeah. Definitely. I'm not even afraid," he rambled. "I have my rug sack and everything."_

"_Excellent, its important to always be prepared," Angeal drawled, turning back around in his seat. "Let's get going then." And with that he started up the engine._

_Zack looked over at his friend and smiled._

"_This is going to be really fun. Angeal brought me to Dilly Dallies earlier and we got a bunch of sweets and I got a movie. Um," he swallowed some saliva that was building in his mouth, "The Chronicles of Iguion." He couldn't believe he had actually got that movie, it was suppose to be really gross and violent. Soooo cool!_

_Cloud's eyes widened until they almost popped out of their sockets. The Chronicles of Iguion? That was suppose to be for big kids. His mom would never let him see that. This was going to be the best night ever!_

"_How did you get Angeal to buy that?" He whispered, leaning in towards the older boy._

"_He was talking on the phone so I just put it on the counter and he paid for it. He didn't even look," Zack sniggered, looking over towards his uncle cautiously before looking back at the boy._

"_I would be afraid to do that," Cloud worried his bottom lip. "Mom would notice." He admitted, shuddering at he thought._

"_Yeah but I'm skillful," Zack bragged, running a hand through his hair. Cloud laughed._

"_What's so funny?" Angeal glanced at the boys through the front mirror. They both sat up straight in their seats and a hurried _"_nothing," was said in union. _

"_Raaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwww"_

"_AHHHHHHHHHHHHH"_

_Angeal opened the door to the living room, quickly taking in the sight of the two boys on the couch with cushions pressed to their faces._

"_What are you-" but his question was answered when he took a look at the television. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair as he walked over towards the box and shut it off._

"_No, we were watching that," Zack's decidedly pale face poked out from behind the cushion he was holding, and pouted. _

"_I think you've had enough," he muttered back._

_ Cloud finally revealed his own face from behind its soft protector and if Zack was pale, he was transparent, with big watery eyes to add to the spooked visage. _

"_Are you okay Cloud?" He asked kindly, making an effort to be as unimposing as he could be. The boy nodded wordlessly._

_He gave his nephew a pointed look and the boy ducked his head guiltily. _

"_No more movies. Perhaps you boys should do something else for a while, you have games in your room don't you Zack?" _

_The look of relief on both of the boy's faces was obvious even though they tried to feign despondency._

"_Fine if we have to!" Zack sat up and put the cushion down by his side. "I have really good games, let's do them for a while Cloud."_

"_Kay," Cloud seemed to gain some colour back to his face as he followed the other boy up and they made their way to the room. _

_Once Cloud was inside the hallway Zack turned back to his uncle and mouthed the words "Cloud's scared" silently, with such a look of seriousness on his face it was a struggle for his uncle not to chuckle. He kept his face neutral and pointed at the television._

"_He's younger than you," he chastised, tilting his head, "it's your job to watch out for him." _

_Zack nodded, and seemingly content that his own reputation was not jeopardized, he waved and disappeared from the room._

_Cloud was sitting on the bed when he got there, looking at him expediently with eyes that were still slightly watery._

"_What will we play?" He asked._

"_I dunno," Zack hummed and walked over to the box where he kept his things. "Um, I have a cool battle game. We have to pick sides and fight wars."_

"_That sounds cool," the blond said happily, still quieted by his earlier scare. He didn't like the way the monsters set all those soldiers on fire... _

"_Yeah, it is actually," Zack lifted the box in his arms with a grunt and brought it over to the bed in front of his friend. Cloud moved back and got on his knees to watch the other open up the box and set up the board._

"_Now," Zack stuck his tongue out the side of his mouth as he searched for something else in the box. A few seconds later he pulled out a clear plastic bag containing several small figurines. "We have to pick leaders. You can choose first if you want because you're the guest."_

"_Okay," the bag was emptied onto the bed and Cloud sorted through them with his small hands. He looked for a few seconds until he made an excited sound and picked up a particular model._

"_Ohhh, Sephiroth," he whispered, studying the little mold with big eyes, turning it this way and that in front of his face. "I want to be him. He's the best warrior there ever was!" _

"_Yeah, he's really good. Angeal is good too though," Zack muttered, reaching in and picking up the mold of said person. "I always play as him," he revealed._

"_Yeah, he's really good. But I never saw Sephiroth before. Is he really big looking?"_

"_Yeah he is. And he walks really straight, like a statue. I think he's kind of weird." _

"_He's not weird!" Cloud's mouth dropped open and his face took on a look of pure indignity. "He's the General of the whooole army. And he's the best warrior ever."_

"_Yeah but he's not nice. I saw him a few times and he never ever smiles or anything. He's stuck up," Zack scrunched up his own face at the thought. Cloud considered this for a minute, pressing the mold to his chin._

"_Maybe he's in a bad mood. I wonder if he gets mad."_

"_He definitely gets mad," Zack rounded his eyes and leaned forward. "that's why everyone is afraid of him and he lives on his own."_

"_He lives on his own?" Cloud asked. "Where's does his mommy live?"_

_"__I don't think he has one," the older boy said gravely.__  
_

_"What about his daddy?"_

_"Nope."_

"_Oh, well that's sad. But he's lucky he gets to live on his own. And that he's such a good warrior. I wish I was a brilliant fighter, then they wouldn't pick on me at school. I could just stab them with my sword," Zack sniggered at him._

"_You'd get in big trouble if you did that. Ha ha, it would be funny though," Cloud laughed as well when the boy started making stabbing motions at invisible opponents, naming all the horrible boys in their class who were mean to everyone. _

"_Maybe I can get Angeal to make Sephiroth go to school with you one day and threaten everyone. Then they'd leave you alone." _

_The blond boy stopped laughing and considered this._

"_But I thought you said he was stuck up?" He asked. Zack shrugged._

"_Well he is. But he's a hero too so he has to protect innocents at all costs. That's his job."_

"_So he's a protector?"_

"_Yeah, and he only hurts bad people and would never, ever hurt an innocent person."_

_"Cool. I really want to meet him someday... in person. Do you think I could?"_

_"Sure. Why not?"  
_

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"I don't want to," Cloud swallowed several times while turning his face back to the window. He squeezed his eyes shut when he heard the man clear his throat, something he tended to do before he got angry.

Sephiroth flexed his hand against the wall beside the blonde's head, moving his body so his shadow covered the much smaller form. A shiver rushed down his left leg as it brushed against the boy's backside, making him even more impatient.

Cloud's eyes ran dreamily over the snow covered land outside. He had never seen this sort of snow before and it really was fascinating the way it managed to quilt over absolute everything, taking all the color away. Sephiroth's bedroom window was high up from the ground, offering a view of the whole landscape for acres ahead, the pelt of tall evergreen trees with their white caps, the valleys of hills and flat plains, the absence of any kind of building for what looked like miles and miles.

"I thought we were going to try to behave?" Sephiroth moved his bare hand around to pull the boy's hair back from his forehead. He let his fingers play in the soft locks and watched what he could of his captive's expression in the semi-transparent reflection in the glass. They looked like half people, the two of them, with the insides blotted out and refilled with nighttime snow and stars.

Not knowing what on Gaia he could do or say to make this situation any better, Cloud just remained silent.

Sephiroth smiled a half smile in the glass and suddenly his grip on the strands became tight.

"Hn," Cloud winced when his head was pulled backwards, his face becoming hot as both embarrassment and frustration reddened his cheeks. He didn't move his hands from where they were resting on the windowsill though, because he knew it would be pointless to try to stop Sephiroth doing anything he wanted.

"I'm going to ask again," Sephiroth pulled the boy up until his head was beneath his chin, ignoring the resulting hiss of pain as he brought his lips down towards his temple. "And when I do, you are going to give me the correct answer. Is that clear?" He finished with a kiss on the soft area above Cloud's cheekbone.

"But I…I'm still sore," the boy whispered in reply, his terror outweighing humiliation. He tried to shift his head so that his neck wouldn't be so strained by the way he was being held but the movement only hurt him more.

His words did have an effect, but not the one he was hoping for because instead of making him feel merciful, Sephiroth couldn't help the smile that spread out on his face. Cloud was hurting because of what he had done to him, and sore where he had touched inside him. It was so arousing to think that the boy was carrying the feeling of him around with him, permanently marked by their union.

"I know," he whispered, his arm sneaking around the boy's thin waist and pulling his body back against his groin. "You still feel me."

Every muscle in Cloud's body pulled taught and he tried to ignore the feeling against his back with determination. _Don't freak out. Don't freak out. Stay calm Stay calm._

"Yeah," he swallowed the sand his throat and nodded his head shakily. "So I don't think we should…"

"Hm, no," his captor cut him off and placed another kiss on his cheek. He began stroking the flat stomach in an uncomfortably intimate way, making Cloud hunch over a bit. "You have to get used to it. It will hurt the first few times, I know," he smiled. "But eventually you'll learn to love it. It will be the best thing you'll ever experience." He let the shivering boy back down fully to his feet after that. Then he wrapped his arm around his shoulders and hugged him against his chest, feeling that he needed to do that suddenly. "I was nervous the first time myself, everyone is. But it gets better."

"…" Cloud opened his mouth to argue some more but then defeat clamped his jaw. What was the point? Sephiroth was going to twist everything he said to suit himself anyway. He wanted what he wanted and even though he wanted something which belonged to Cloud, it didn't really matter whether he consented or not. He was just a mind trapped inside the body that this man had control over. He didn't matter.

He felt himself become distant from his surrounding, his vision frayed with blackness.

_Hide yourself away._

That voice. That voice he had been hearing so often, in his dreams. It was familiar, but he couldn't place it properly.

"Cloud, I'm going to have you again now."

_Don't let him have all of you. Understand?_

Sephiroth smiled when the teen remained silent, the only sign that he had heard him at all being the tensing of smaller limbs beneath his own.

He began walking backwards, slowly so as not to startle the boy out of his complacent daze. Like a good puppet the blond allowed himself to be pulled backwards. He allowed himself to be turned around and kissed a few times on his mouth. He was calm but stiff as rocks as his clothes were removed. It was a short process since he was only wearing his white shirt and shorts; no zips or buttons involved; nothing to shield, noting to protect.

Cloud's mind was spinning as the hands and lips began touching him and kissing him all over his skin. He looked up and caught sight of one little area on the ceiling. It was the only part of the white plain that wasn't perfect. The paint was chipped and curled away from itself there, and the underneath was grey and bumpy, revealing what the layers of pristine whiteness were really covering. The veneered decay.

His eyes remained fixed on the patch, like a safety ring in a stormy ocean, as Sephiroth continued his molesting exploration. He didn't flinch when he was pushed onto his back, even though his whole stomach began to flip and turn and bile made its way to the back of his throat. He stayed calm on the outside, and kept his eyes on that spot as much as possible. He could get past this. He could handle this.

_Don't let him have all of you._

Sephiroth didn't take any notice the boy's lack of attention, his mind more focused on the salty taste of the skin under his lips, and the feel of it under his fingers. Cloud's skin really was perfect, not a spot or bump or anything to mar it. That wasn't really unusual for a sixteen year old he supposed, but still the boy's was particularly good. He spent a while kissing and fondling the placid body beneath him, wetting the flesh and warming it until he became taken over with pure carnal instinct.

This was different that than the first time he had taken the boy. That time was all internal, it was about his mind and how it was affected by what he was doing. He had to be sober that time, and the experience was beyond anything he could have imagined. It was perfect. But this time he was all about the physicality of the act. It was about how Clouds nipples hardened against his heaving chest, how his legs jerked when his crotch was approached, how sweat pooled in his bellybutton and rolled along the flat of his stomach.

He used his fingers to feel along the bones of his collar and shoulder and pressed so he could feel them more prominently beneath the skin, he moved his hands slowly down the teen's sternum, barley touching so that his Mako enhanced nerves could feel the fine hairs standing up from the skin. They tickled him and like a child he smiled at the sensation. He was fascinated with the effect of his lips on the boys neck, how a piece of smooth, flawless flesh could be turned a reddish purple within a few seconds and stay that way for days. He was so obsessed with the effect that he found himself spending numerous minutes covering the most interesting parts of his body with the…what were they called… love bites? Once he grew tired of that he dedicated that his lover's pretty face was left unattended for far too long.

Clouds eyes were frosted looking and he seemed like he was on the verge of sleep. It annoyed Sephiroth but at the same time the compliance was making it so easy to do what he wanted. Sometimes dealing with a crying, pleading teenager could be so bothersome, make him feel something of a cruel monster. This felt more civilized He leaned forward and lightly blew on Cloud's pink lips before closing the distance and pressing their mouths together.

"Hmm" he moaned as the boy's individual flavor fell over his taste buds. It didn't taste like anything, not like food or fruit or flowers as so many bards like to babble, but it was appealing none the less and he found himself almost shoving his tongue down the boys throat in order to take in as much as he could.

_Keep yourself away Cloud._

Cloud kept his eyes on the spot on the ceiling, he didn't move them. His captor was kissing him and his hair and face kept blocking his vision but he didn't move them. He couldn't move. Or he would die.

Sephiroth pulled back and took in several lungful of air. His eyes were blurry for a moment but when they cleared and focused on the angelic face beneath him a small twinge coiled itself in his gut. Clouds eyes were open but he didn't look like he was awake. The blue irises were tilted upwards and unmoving. If not for the rapid rise and fall of his chest, he could have passed for dead.

Unnerved by the concept, he decided to turn the boy around, arguing with himself that it would make what he was about to do easier for both of them.

Cloud closed his eyes and put his head sideways on the pillow so he could stare out towards the window. His hands twitched beneath his stomach as he tried to keep calm and ignore the way the other man was spreading his legs and running his palms down his back, up his thighs and then finally over... all of him.

_It's not so bad_, he convinced himself. It's just pain. He could handle it. It's just s-sex and it didn't mean anything to him. It didn't matter. He could get through it.

He managed to convince himself that everything would be okay, and for a while he even believed it. But when something hard and slick made its way between his cheeks and pressed against his entrance his vision became clearer and it was harder to ignore where he was.

One thrust of his kidnapper's hips was all that was needed to shatter the illusion.

His screams filled the entire house, the landscape beyond it, the pelt of tall evergreen trees with their white caps, the valleys of hills and flat plains... going on for miles and miles, but still reaching no one who could help him.

He called for an end to it.

He called for relief.

He called for his mother. A prayer that would never, in his lifetime, be answered.

Sephiroth had raped him that night. It was horrible and humiliating and painful. Afterwards he found that he couldn't move his legs or his back very much and so he had been forced to lie in the bed for almost an entire day and night, suffering the man's cold words and icy touch. Sephiroth had told him how much he loved him, and how good he was being and how his life would be better now that the last of his family had left him alone. He didn't reply or even react to the man. There was no point.

The pain lasted for days, because every night afterwards he was raped again, sometimes more than once. It always hurt and it was always humiliating and terrifying but he never complained, because Sephiroth would be nice to him afterwards and he would allow him painkilling potions and whatever else he wanted. He even purchased a new television and set it up in his room so that Cloud could watch whatever he wanted when he felt too sore to do anything else. He really was thankful for that because as the days passed he discovered the release watching television could bring. He could watch other's living their lives and he could see how normal people still lived, he could transcend beyond the room and become these characters, live their sunny existences, be with their pretty friends and share their bright futures. This release became essential.

Days turned into weeks and time passed as it always had. Things stayed much the same but at the same time became essentially different. He didn't talk very much anymore, he didn't try to fight Sephiroth or argue with anything he did. In a way he just became an automaton. He was alive but he no longer felt anything. Nothing he did meant anything to him because his very life had been taken away. Sephiroth owned him; Sephiroth decided where he slept, what he wore, what he ate, what he did, how he did it... They didn't fight anymore, and domestically life was civil. Sephiroth could be kind at times, and that was starting to mean more and more to him as time moved on.

And yet there were still... breaks. Moments where he realized just how much he wanted his old life back. How much he missed his family and friends. He missed people he never even knew he liked, like the obese butcher where he would buy his meet with his mom, or the funny school secretary who had often been the one to inform him when his mother had had to be taken to hospital during school hours, or the waiter at the diner he and his friends used to visit.

His friends.

He missed them so much more than he ever thought he would.

He missed Yuffie's eccentricity, the way she'd always say the wrong things at the wrong times and the way she never got embarrassed when she did. He missed the way she would always come barging into school with new and crazy ideas that she somehow managed to persuade everyone to go along with. Yuffie was great; she was a true friend who would always be there when it mattered. They all were. Leon was stoic and cold but he was always trustworthy and friendly, Reno was rude and acted like nothing mattered to him but Cloud always knew that he was smarter than everyone gave him credit for, the most intelligent of them all even, and that there was more to him than one could guess. Axel was proof of that. The two of them pretended they could care less about the other and constantly pissed each other off but anyone could see how much they cared and that they would kill anyone who hurt the other, Cloud had often envied them for their bond actually. He missed Yuna and Tidus, Yuna was so sweet and beautiful and Tidus was just a good natured person. He missed Tifa and he felt bad for how he had thought of her before he was kidnapped, how he'd blamed her for his own mistakes. It wasn't her fault that Zack had chosen her, and it wasn't her fault that he had never been brave enough to say it.

Zack. He should have told him sooner.

Gaia he missed that boy. He missed everything about him. Zack was his best friend; he was the one person he thought would never leave. He had such a great aura around him that Cloud both adored and envied. Everything just seemed so easy with Zack. He smiled so happily and found everything funny, like when old people commented on something completely irrelevant like the price of noodles, or when a teacher used an old-fashioned phrase that he would annoyingly repeat over and over again for days afterwards. He wasn't just about fun though, that was something most people didn't see. In Cloud's opinion Zack had more integrity than anyone else he knew. He wanted to help and protect everyone; he'd made it the mission of his life. Cloud had confided almost all of his secrets to the other teen and he always felt better when he did. Sometimes he found himself weeping because Sephiroth had said something or done something to upset him and he desperately wanted Zack to comfort him and tell him that everything was okay. The longing he felt for the other was almost a physical pain, and he knew it would never ease... just like he knew it wouldn't for her either.

His mom... there was no thinking of her anymore. That, more than anything else, was death.

He found himself becoming bitter too. Sometimes when he was thinking about his old life he would become angry because he realized that so much time had passed and they would have had to move on with their own lives. They had to forget him. He thought of them hanging out with each other, laughing and enjoying themselves, and it drove him crazy. How could they just forget about him? It was the same thing when Seifer died; even his closest friends were back to their old selves just weeks after his death. They just forgot him. They would all forget him too. Life would go on without him and his friends would go with it. It wasn't fair! He would never forget them. How could they enjoy their freedom when he was suffering like this?

He knew he was being stupid though. He knew that they had to move on. They thought he was dead after all. How could he not be, after all this time. Even if that poor body had turned out not to be his, they knew...

But these thoughts, as already stated, were just breaks in an otherwise endless stream of apathetic, unfeeling consciousness. He didn't think of his previous life, his sadness and grief, he was just there... Sephiroth's puppet. And maybe that would be okay.

For six months there was not one day which passed without sex. The first few weeks it was the same thing every time, Cloud would pull himself away and let the man do with his body as he wished. Every time they did it became easier for him to stay calm for longer and eventually he was able to restrain his screams. Sephiroth hadn't lied when he said that it would hurt at first, it did. Awfully. Some days he wasn't even able to sit up with the painful darts up and down his spine. Sephiroth also hadn't lied when he said that he would eventually get used to it because after a month of continues penetration his body adjusted and it stopped hurting so much. Instead of being relieved by this however, Cloud was deeply bothered by the thought that his body had grown used to the man, that it had accepted him. It made him wonder if the rest should follow suit. Perhaps there was a new life with this man, if he'd just stop being so stubborn all the time, and sometimes it seemed like there could be, when the man was being kind to him.

But other times... sometimes, he really was the monster who had hurt, kidnapped, raped and tortured him for months on end...

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Cloud was sitting up in his bed with the blue blankets covering his legs, his eyes focused on the screen in front of him as the movie played away. It was just a harmless family film about two kids that were trying to win a talent competition in the wake of family conflict and romantic turmoil, the kind he would have scoffed at one time, but now the only type he could bring himself to watch.

He was halfway through the film when the door to his room opened. He didn't bother to turn his head to see who it was, but sat up straighter and smoothed the blanket over his knees more tidily.

"Hello love," Sephiroth reached the bed in long but easy steps, putting a hand on the his shoulder and leaning down to kiss him on top of his head.

"Sorry I was late, work kept me," he murmured, looking towards the television as he spoke, just out of interest, "what are you watching?"

"Just a movie," he mumbled, trying to ignore the way the other started to remove his leather clothing, starting with his gloves followed by his jacket and the rest.

"Yeah?" Sephiroth, now nude, leaned forward on the bed and then maneuvered himself until he was pressed up beside his lover. He turned the boys head to face him with a finger beneath his chin and when their eyes met he brought their lips together. Cloud gasped a bit as his breath was taken from him but relaxed and let his mouth be invaded.

Sephiroth pulled back and smiled at his boy while his left hand pushed the blankets down his legs to reveal the skin of his thighs. He slid a finger up and down the plain, digging in a bit and leaving light pink trails afterwards.

"Did you finish all the food I left you?" He questioned and began to unbutton the boy's long shirt. Cloud nodded, his breath making a few of the silvery strands shuffle. Sephiroth mouthed good before he once again kissed the teen, his fingers working quickly to open the shirt and when it was open he ran his hand over the boys torso.

_I'm with you_

Cloud felt the static build in his mind as he drew further and further into himself. As usual Sephiroth fondled and kissed him, pushing him completely onto his back so he could straddle him.

He was so distanced from the situation that he got a shock when the man pulled back and hissed his name sharply.

"_Cloud_."

He snapped back to reality and his vision cleared again. He opened his eyes and looked at the other in askance, honestly not knowing what he had done wrong. This was what they did every time. Why was it changing?

"You're not doing this anymore," Sephiroth spat, looking very angry. He sat up on his knees and grabbed the boy's arms, pulling him up to a sitting position with him. Cloud's eyes darted around the room, as if he could find an answer there, before landing back on Sephiroth.

"I want to try something different," his smile was strange as he ran his fingers over the boy's bottom lip. Cloud kept perfectly still, although his stomach was starting to turn. Something different? What did that mean? They had…had sex, in many different positions before. Why was Sephiroth making such a big deal this time? He usually just moved him and positioned him as he wanted. Why was this different? Why did Sephiroth look so strange?

"There are many ways lovers can please each other," his captor, _his captor_, began in a slow, controlled voice. One that Cloud knew well. "There are more entrances to your body than just this one." Cloud jumped when he felt Sephiroth dig his fingers into him. He hands even noticed the hand there. Extremely uncomfortable with the conversation, and unable to take himself away, he shifted a little and swallowed the bile rising in his throat. "And although this one is perfect," Sephiroth cooed, leaning in to kiss his cheek, as though he was trying to assure him he hadn't done anything wrong, "sometimes it's pleasant to try new things."

Clouds mind wasn't really taking in the other's words so he didn't understand what was being said. Sephiroth licked his bottom lip and gave him a pointed look.

"Let's not pretend you don't know what oral sex is Cloud," he said in a flat tone and rose a silver brow.

_Oral sex._

Suddenly the word hit him and he felt like he had been stabbed in the stomach. He shook his head, although it was more to get the word out of his head than to deny his kidnappers request, as Sephiroth took it.

"Hush. Cloud. Cloud." Sephiroth grabbed his head with both hands and made him look him in the eye. He held the contact for a few long seconds before talking again.

"You _want_ to do this for me," he said slowly, drawing out every word, "you want to please me Cloud. I've done everything for you and ask for nothing in return only that you be pleasant and polite."

Cloud took a deep breath.

"You will do this for me, understand," he pressed, clamping his fingers into the skin of the boy's cheek harder. Cloud was too afraid to move, he didn't like when his kidnapper got this intense.

"…" Sephiroth let him go and sat back to look at the teen for a moment. Cloud hadn't realized he was shaking until he grasped his shirt to close it back over his chest. He folded his arms in front of himself in order to control this involuntary function.

The movie continued to play in the background and it was so wrong that the people on screen could laugh and joke and talk about such meaning-less things while he was going through such torment. Were they laughing at him? Were they there to torture him?

He lowered his sad eyes to the bedspread beneath them as his rapist shifted and brought his hands down towards his crotch. This wasn't…right. Why was Sephiroth doing that? He had never done such a thing before, it was so…rude. The one thing Cloud could take comfort in during his rapes was that he was so distanced from the act. He didn't have to do anything and he didn't have to look at Sephiroth. He didn't want to connect what they were doing with anything really sexual and so he never looked at Sephiroth's… at that part of him. Oh Gaia, he didn't want to see it.

When he had finished getting himself to full erection, Sephiroth removed his hand, hissing as the cold air hit his sensitive skin, and looked at his boy again. Cloud seemed to realize he was being stared at and he looked up at the man's face with glossy eyes.

"I don't know..." he broke off, wrapping his hands tighter around himself.

"You don't know what to do?" Sephiroth repeated in a tenor tone, "It's all right, I'll talk you through it."

Cloud felt his face become red and he looked to his left. His wish for something to stop this whole thing was so strong that it almost hurt his stomach. He couldn't do this. Sex was bad, horrible, the world thing in the world. How could he do this?

Sephiroth moved towards him, his silver hair falling over his face and pouring over his tank like chest to brush against his organ. He was a monster.

That monster clasped the strong claw to on the back of his neck and began to place downwards pressure on it. Cloud didn't really resist but he didn't allow it either.

"Come on, good boy. Just lower you head." Sephiroth whispered repeatedly. Cloud began to struggle slightly as he was forced closer to his greatest fear. No, nonononono. It was too real. He didn't want to do this.

"Please," he moaned. Sephiroth shushed him again and continued pushing him until his face was against his groin.

Cloud pressed his eyes shut tightly and tried not to breathe. The smell was making him sick. It was too much. He couldn't be here. This was perverted; it was dirty. Why was Sephiroth always trying to make him bad?

"Okay, now. Open your mouth." Sephiroth was horse with excitement. A true sadist no matter what he tried to pretend otherwise.

"I… No."

"Don't ever say NO," the man unexpectedly bellowed above him, causing him to jump in fright. "Open your mouth!" He repeated in a low hiss.

Letting out a desperate choked noise, Cloud tried to control his shaking body and slowly inched his jaw open. His eyes rolled up to look at the man above him but they couldn't catch his face because of the streaming hair falling over him and blocking his view.

"Alright, good boy," Sephiroth whispered as his hand moved into the boys hair. He murmured encouragement as he slowly guided the boy's head into position.

"Take the head into your mouth," Cloud let out moans of anguish and tried to shift his head away, but wasn't allowed. He hyperventilated and squeezed his eyes shut so he wouldn't have to see the throbbing pink flesh hidden by coils of bright and darker silver curls. The smell was so strong it turned his stomach.

_Cloud, it's okay. I'm here._

Eventually, with a will he never knew he possessed, he managed to lower his mouth over the throbbing mass of flesh. When his lips touched the head however, he started and snapped his head back. Sephiroth had seemly been expecting such an action and quickly clamped the back of his head to keep him in place.

"There," he coaxed, shuddering at the feeling of the boy's mouth on the most sensitive part of his anatomy. He grit his teeth and pushed the boy's head a few inches further Cloud whimpered but his vocal movements only worked to further please the man.

"Move down further, you can go further."

Cloud felt a pressure beneath his chin and was sure he was going to vomit. He gripped the comforter tighter beneath him and urged his head further down the shaft. He couldn't connect it all, he couldn't fathom the fact that this was... Sephiroth. How had it come to this? It wasn't real, it couldn't be real. He wouldn't do something like this. He was Cloud Strife.

_The body of Cloud Strife has been found._

Was he Cloud? H-he was sure he was but… Cloud wouldn't do this. Cloud was just a normal kid. He wouldn't be a part of something like this. THIS WASN'T REAL. CLOUD WOULDN'T DO THIS.

Sephiroth's breaths came in hisses and when a sharp jolt of pleasure shot up his spine he unconsciously pushed on the boy's head again, forcing him further down the organ.

Clouds eyes widened as his gag reflex was sparked by the pressure against his mouth. He brought his hands up to push at the man's stomach in order to gain leverage to push himself back.

With a hint of Sadism, Sephiroth held the chocking boy where he was for a minute, the small fingers on his naval and the contractions taking place around his manhood overwhelming him with pleasure. Eventually he allowed the boy to move back although only a few inches.

Cloud was hyperventilating entreatingly quickly, drool was running out of his mouth at both corners and tears and mucus was running down his face. His kidnapper brought his free hand up to run over his still clothed back and began cooing.

"There there, good boy. Eventually you will learn how to take all of me," this horrified Cloud as even when the organ was pressing his throat there were several inches left outside his mouth, it would have to go halfway down his throat to be completely engulfed. Surly that would strangle him.

"But I love you. And I understand you're new to this. So this is as far as well go today," The man's voice betrayed his impatience and he ran his hand over the small back and neck heavily in order to expel some energy.

"Now, I want you to place your hand here," he gripped Cloud hand and brought it towards the root of his dick. Cloud allowed his fingers to be wrapped around the throbbing heat, feeling it pulse like it had a mind of its own.

"Good," Sephiroth kept his hand over the boy's and squeezed in order to gain that beautiful friction.

"Now," he ordered breathlessly, "work your tongue around me, do it. Or perhaps we will try to take the whole thing today. Hmm?"

Cloud groaned but not seeing any alternative he began moving his tongue around. He wasn't sure what to do, or if he was doing it correctly, but Sephiroth began moaning and hissing, seemingly pleased...

"That's right love," the man squeezed his hand and started moving it in upwards and downwards motions. "That's it. You're such a good boy. Perfect at everything."

Cloud wasn't listening, his jaw was starting to hurt badly, and it was all he could do to stop himself from screaming or vomiting…or both.

"Move your head," again Sephiroth took control of things by gripping the boy's head, not too tight, and slowly bobbing it in upwards and downwards motions. Cloud's cheeks burned and drool ran down his from his lips. This was disgusting. He wouldn't be doing this.

"Hggng" he jerked sharply when something gooey that tasted of sour salt started to seep down the back of his throat. He gagged, wondering if this meant that it was over.

It wasn't though, what he was tasting was precum. More and more began to drop out of the man but he couldn't concentrate on it because Sephiroth movements became suddenly harsher. He gripped the hand around the base of his shaft hard enough to hurt and moved it up and downwards quickly, hitting Cloud's nose and chin occasionally. His hand became tight in the boy's hair as he clawed it mercilessly, forcing the boy to gag repetitively as the head of his penis collided with the back of his throat.

"Hnnnngh." Cloud tried to get the man's attentions, fearing that he would choke. He couldn't breathe properly, his nose was running and Sephiroth was pushing him down too far. He couldn't catch his breath.

His free hand began to bang on the man's legs, then pull at his hair in some way to get his attention. He was going to choke. He was going to get sick from the liquid running down his throat, and the flesh against his tonsils and suffocate

"Hggngh," he cried and began sobbing with fear. His mouth hurt his jaws ached and he couldn't breathe.

Sephiroth was moving erratically, lifting his hips in the air and pushing the boy's head down to get more friction. He threw his head back and groaned out into the heavy air of an underground prison.

"Perfect," he hissed, "You're perfect."

The act lasted another five minutes, Cloud managed to get a breath or two but his face was almost purple by the time Sephiroth stopped moving and with a loud gasp he pushed the boy's head hard against his crotch, making him scream.

"Yes," he gasped as his seed began to fill the boys throat

"Hnnngh," Cloud gagged as the salty liquid relentlessly chocked him, running down his throat, over his tongue and out over his lips.

Sephiroth's orgasm lasted several long seconds of equal bliss and misery, before eventually he relaxed his body and slumped onto the bed.

With his head free, Cloud wasted no time in pushing himself from the man's lap. He was crying heavily and wiped at the fluid leaking out of his mouth and running down his chin as he made his way swiftly to the bathroom.

Sephiroth stretched back against the blue pillow basking in his afterglow, and chuckled at the sound of the boy's retching. Cloud was so _dramatic._

Cloud remained in the bathroom for around ten minutes, he vomited the entire contents of his stomach, all of the food his kidnapper had so kindly left for him that day, and then dry heaved until his midsection cramped and his tonsils were raw. When he finally finished he realized just how disgusting the taste in his mouth was. He stood up, swooning for a minute as a wave of dizziness took him. When his mind cleared he made his way over to the sink to brush his teeth.

Sephiroth was looking mindlessly at the television when he eventually returned to the room. The man had his hands behind his head and his still bare body was stretched out on the bed with one of his legs folded and the other lying flat. He smiled at the miserable looking teenager and held his arm out.

Cloud leaned against the door and buttoned his skirt which he only now seemed to realize was open.

"Come over here," Sephiroth whispered, actually looking like he wanted to comfort the unhappy boy. Cloud pursed his lips and walked slowly towards him with his arms crossed.

"You're very good at pleasing me," the man pulled the boy down and held his arms around him. He drew his finger lightly over the soft pink lips and the smiled into the boy's silent eyes. "Perfect." He looked a bit dazed for a minute before he turned towards the television.

"Your movie hasn't finished yet. Why don't we watch the rest together?"

But five minutes later the boy was turned into the wall, where he stayed for the rest of the night, and his sobbing drowned out any scripted line those happy, sunny tormentors on the screen could have possibly uttered into a world where everything looked, felt, smelt and now tasted, like misery.

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Sephiroth remembered that day vividly; the feeling of his boy's mouth around him, the little whimpers and sounds he'd made…it had been a perfect experience and strangely enough, not one he'd indulged in since then. Cloud was very upset afterwards, and his despondency lasted for several days wherein it was a chore to get him to eat or talk or do anything but stare vacantly ahead of himself. The fact that the boy resented the act so much made him feel awkward about it, considering the intimacy involved. He felt just a bit too… much. Sex was one thing but making the boy do that to him, when it so clearly sickened him, seemed cruel and filthy and honestly embarrassed Sephiroth himself. So he didn't make him do it again. It wouldn't be truthful to say that Cloud's distress was the only reason for this though, because it was also the fact that between instructing the boy and making sure he wasn't choking, the whole event had been tedious and honestly not as satisfying as their normal coupling, which he'd returned to the following night.

Eventually his boy had snapped out of his daze, although whether his state was really any better was a consideration Sephiroth wondered over. Cloud was so quiet now, and so solemn. Sephiroth watched him, when he didn't know he was being watched, how he would sit for hours on end, not looking at anything or doing anything, just thinking, and thinking and thinking... his watery eyes wide and unblinking, seeing worlds his captor had no access to.

But he found himself ignoring this fact, reasoning that the boy was simply sulking and looking for attention, and that there was nothing he could do but wait it out. Cloud was so good now that it made up for it. He wouldn't fight or argue or curse. He was the perfect little angel that Sephiroth knew he would be. He would do what he was told and never refused him anything and as the months went by the two of them got into a comfortable routine, one which Sephiroth had previously considered dull and repetitive, but now he understood the simple pleasure of returning from work to find the one you love most in the world waiting for you, calm and willing to please.

Cloud didn't fight him any longer, and he was overall well behaved when it came to more mundane and daily matters. The third day after his birthday the treadmill Sephiroth had bought him had arrived, and he and Cloud had set it up in his room. Well, he set it up and the blond watched with gloomy eyes, occasionally handing him a tool or piece of equipment when instructed. He wasn't sure how the gift would be accepted by the boy and was extremely glad to see that he did take an interest in it. Cloud had been something of a runner before he came to live with him and so his body and mind might have missed the activity. At first Sephiroth had set a goal for the boy to reach each day, just two miles. He ordered the machine to be left on so he could review the data each day and was pleased to see that by the third day the boy had surpassed this goal. He let him decide his own routine from then on. And as the months passed Cloud's body showed the results of the exercise.

Summer in Modeheim would not be considered summer anywhere else. It continued to snow and the temperatures remained at freezing levels. But there wasn't as many blizzards and some days the air was placid enough to allow a person to stay out in for a couple of hours at least. So he went out to a local villiage one afternoon and purchased a pair of thermal trousers, a jumper, a woolly hat, snow boots and a very heavy coat. The boy wore these when he took him outside, for a walk or just to sit for a while and get some colour back into his face.

He remembered the first day he had taken the boy out. Cloud had been so confused, and so wary. He knew what the boy was thinking and he understood why he was scared but for some reason he couldn't bring himself to comfort him. Perhaps he wanted the boy to be afraid, to ensure his behavior for the small walk. Or perhaps there was something else that he wouldn't acknowledge. Cloud was like a skittish Chocobo chick as he stayed close to his side while they made their way to the front door. He looked adorable, his cute face hidden beneath the high collar of his black coat and the woolly hat forcing his bangs to curl around his forehead and cheeks. He looked so young then, and a feeling of de ja vu struck Sephiroth because at that moment he'd remembered what Cloud had looked like all those months ago when he first found him. It was only then that he realized how much his boy had changed. He was so different now. And it made him sad. Sad to think that the boy was growing up, and would only remain his gullible child for a handful of years. His little angel would be gone…

But it wasn't all forlorn, because Cloud was maturing beautifully. His features were growing even more delicate; his jawbone had lost the roundness of childhood and was becoming finely carved and angular. The skin over his cheekbones and around his eyes grew thinner, revealing the delicate structure of the bones beneath and the oval curves of his big eyes. As his face changed so did his body, turning lithe and slim and finely sewn around the arms and thigh. Cloud wasn't very tall, in fact he was probably short for his age and Sephiroth hypothesized that while he had some growing left to do, and had indeed done some in their time together, the boy would never have what one would consider a tall stature, but would always remain petite and fine. He was turning into a beautiful young man, and Sephiroth felt fortunate that he would be there during the boy's maturity, that he could mold and shape him into what considered the perfect mate for years to come. Cloud Strife would always be beautiful.

Distracted by thoughts such as these for several minutes, Sephiroth had only come back to attention when he noticed Cloud shift uncomfortably under his scrutiny. He had mumbled and apology and then led the boy away from the front door with an arm around his shoulders. Cloud was tense and had trouble finding his feet in the thick snow that almost reached his knees at some points, but in reality these jitters were more likely caused by nerves at the trip's intentions.

The General had no plan however, he merely wanted to give the boy a chance to get some fresh air. They'd walked along the snowy path for several minutes, Cloud looking around curiously at the blindingly white scenery while Sephiroth kept watch for passer-by's. There would be no one around, but instincts never left a man.

Eventually the path ran into a small gathering of pine trees which was flanked by two hills on either side. After that there was what could be called a road which led to a far off village, the one he used to travel to work, but they didn't go anywhere near that. The weather conditions in Modeoheim were brutal and freezing, so Cloud could only stay out in it for so long before it became too much for his human system.

They'd walked around a bit in silence, Cloud's nervousness fading to wonder, Sephiroth watching all the emotions flicker through his eyes as he took in the startling scenery. It must have been strange to be outside for the first time in so long. Almost a year bar one small incident.

He had taken the boy back eventually, secretly loving how he stayed close to his side because he was cold and that his nose and his cheeks were burning a light pink. He looked so desirable at that moment that it took all of his will to wait till they were inside before he made love to him, slowly and gently.

He had taken him out numerous times after that and counted those moments with his love as the some of the most peaceful of his life. They'd sit for hours in the bench at the back of his house, able to tolerate each other's company this way because of how connected their souls had become.

Overall the time passed peacefully. There were some events that stood out in his mind, such as when he had to cut the boys hair. It really was getting too long, well long wasn't the word for it. Cloud really had unusual hair; it grew upwards instead of down, and remained in thick columns that stood in spikes when the hair was short but drooped as it grew. He had just trimmed it a bit at first; not wanting to ruin anything, but eventually grew more confident and cut the hair shorter so it would last longer. Shorter mind you, not short because it seemed to be in the faiths plan for the boy to possess and unruly mop upon his head at all times.

There were so many special moments the two of them shared together, times that only he could appreciate and that would be impossible to explain, and overall Sephiroth's life with Cloud had become what he hoped it would.

And because of all of that, he tried harder to ignore the feeling he got sometimes. It wasn't anything significant, nothing to even mention. It was just a feeling, a twinge at the bottom of his ribs. It came when he watched the boy stare vacantly at nothing for hours, when he sighed or made an unhappy expression, when he flinched from his touch, when he closed his eyes during sex, when he looked at Sephiroth as though he was going to hurt him, when he picked and poked at his food without eating it, when he tried to curl his body away from him, when he made retching noises in the bathroom, when he stared at him as if he were some kind of mon… it wasn't important. It was just a bit of irritation. He had done so much for his boy after all, and he never hurt him. Yet still Cloud didn't trust him. Sometimes he would think of the fact that the boy never really_ talked_ to him, that he mostly just offered him a curt "yes" or "no".

He hadn't smiled.

That stuck him one night, when his was lying in bed with that small body breathing softly against his chest. Cloud hadn't smiled once since he had taken him. Not _once_. It was ridiculous. It was so… cruel. He had done everything for the boy, and he wouldn't even give him a real, genuine smile for his efforts? He was cruel. And sometimes when Sephiroth got that strange feeling at the bottom of his ribs, he wanted to hit the boy. Temper flared in his stomach and he would have to breathe deeply in order to stop himself from giving into urges of repentance and justice. He just wanted the boy to…love him back. That was all. The boy was good, he was well behaved, but was he in love?

He knew the answer.

Yes, Cloud was a cruel boy. He was torturing him, and it made him want to return the favor. Not much. Just a slap, or a punch or a surge of burning electricity through his veins. Something to make him sorry for it all, to show him how Gaia-damned ungrateful he was really being. To show him his cruelty, how hurtful he could be. To show him what death felt like, how different it was to everything he was being given. He wanted him to feel it all, he wanted to make him squirm and cry and beg for another chance, he wanted-

But he never did, he always remembered that his boy was still young, and small and helpless. He just needed more time. More time. More time. So much time had passed already though, and still the urge prevailed, because still the distance prevailed. So, sometimes, when he heard the boy crying next to him in his bed, or saw him wiping away tears from his red eyes when he entered his room, or sat outside the bathroom door and listened to his retching, he let satisfaction warm his blood, and he smiled; the very expression his boy had never offered him.

It was only fair. Cloud was hurting him, and he was hurting himself.

It was only fair…

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	29. XXIX

**Hey everyone, thanks so much for all the reviews and favs. They never cease to make my day! **

**A question a lot of you were asking about the fic was whether it will be over soon or how many chapters there are left. Well I can officially tell you that we are very much nearing the end and that there are about three or four more chapters to go. Thats all (sob! my baby)**

**Anyway, for now I just hope you all enjoy this installment! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

**This fan fiction contains dark, upsetting psychological and sexual themes so if you are not comfortable with that kind of thing then please don't read because I don't want to upset anyone.**

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_Sephiroth wiped the towel over his face, using his other hand to slam the locker door closed with a metallic clink that broke through the monotone atmosphere that always seemed to hover within the walls of Shinra's training facilities. When he was finished with the soiled article he threw it to the left of himself, leaving the crumpled material to hang sloppily from the bench's edge to await someone else's ministrations at a later hour. Such trivial matters weren't his concern._

_His wet hair thudded against his clothed back as he exited the dressing room and made his way through the metallic corridors of Shinra Inc, his home. In a rare occurrence the boy found himself with some free time on his hands; he was finished training for the day, there were no missions assigned to him and Hojo was out of the city for reasons he didn't know about, so he decided that he was going to spend the evening in his room reading one of his books, something that would be a rarely experienced pleasure. _

_Put in better humor by this thought, he was just making his way around the corner that led to the elevator when he suddenly stopped._

"_Why are you spying on me?" His voice was deep and like his face, it seemed atypically mature for his age, even to himself. He didn't turn around when he heard the melodic laugh,_

"_The wandering soul.__.." _

_but did so once the words had been uttered, finding a slinking Genesis regarding him with a grin on his face.  
_  
"... _knows no rest." _

_He sighed, not in the mood for the other's repetitive quoting. Why was this boy so obsessed with that Gaia-damned play anyway? He didn't understand, and Angeal never let him complain about it. _

"_Angeal is in Wutia?" He asked then, because it was unusual to see Genesis without the boy._

"_Angeal is in Wutia," he mimicked, then smiled and walked until he stood directly in front of him, staring into his eyes with a strange kind of intensity that bordered somewhere between hostile and friendly._

_Sephiroth didn't fully know how to deal with this boy; he was so odd and different from the other people he knew that it was always a challenge to converse with him. He supposed they would be what one would call friends, companions being a better word perhaps, but they had never really spent time together without Angeal present. Only now did he realize how much of a buffer the missing boy had been._

"_My friend, your desire…"_

"_What do you want?" He decided that being frank was the best option, otherwise the boy would prattle on endlessly with his poetry and confuse him with his tricky words. Genesis chuckled at him, his stunning hazel eyes brightening with pleasure._

"_I'm booored," he drawled finally, bringing a thin finger up and then, to his shock, twirling it around a lock of his silver hair. Sephiroth stepped back and narrowed his eyes._

"_I don't understand you," he shook his head in exasperation. _

"_Infinite in mystery is the gift of the goddess." The menace brought a hand to his chin and seemed to be thinking over something, his eyes darting back and forth for several seconds, pale hazel now that they were so contaminated with reflecting silver. _

_"Can we go to your quarters?" There was a childishness in the way he asked the question, and the way he looked up at the him with hopeful wide eyes, a bit of his hair caught in the outer lashes of the right._

"…" _The words stuck in his throat for a second before he found himself agreeing. "O…kay?"_

"_For you are beloved by the goddess," smiling brightly, Genesis caught his arm, surprising him again, and pulled him quickly towards the lifts. _

_The journey was short and soon he stood in his kitchen with a glass of water in his hand while the auburn-haired oddity darted around exploring his living room, picking up items and pulling out drawers to find something of interest. Sephiroth didn't mind because there wasn't anything personal in the room; no pictures or letters or childhood artifices, the most the boy could hope to find were some old mission reports, and they didn't really matter. Nothing... damaging, was ever allowed to exist for that long._

"_Do you want a drink?" He motioned his hand towards the fridge, thinking that it was the appropriate protocol when guests were in one's home. Genesis turned to him, smiled again, and shook his head. His long fingers released the glass bowl he was holding and then he slowly made his way into the kitchen again._

"_Are you bored?" He asked in his melodic voice as he leaned himself over the outer part of the counter that separated the two areas. Sephiroth cocked a silver brow._

"_Are you?" He countered. The boy clicked his tongue._

"_Angeal's away," he said and then pouted as he drummed his fingers on the marble surface. _

"_He'll be returning soon," _

"_Nooot for twooo niiiights!" The way he said it made it seem as though the boy was mourning a death, especially when he held up his arms and cried out to the ceiling in a stagy tone, "Hero of the dawn, Healer of worlds!"_

"..._" Sephiroth pressed his lips into a line, not really knowing what the boy wanted him to say. Then, in an instant, Genesis had snapped his attention back to him, all the sorrow falling from his face in a an unsettling whitewash._

"_Do you have friends Sephiroth? At night?" _

"…" _he opened and closed his mouth a few times, like a dying Beachplug. "I…live alone."_

"_Ha ha ha," the other threw his head back and clasped his hands together. "No, then?" He grinned and moved around the counter, keeping his hip pressed to it the entire time, making his movements as slow and languid as a serpents, or a slum woman's_

_But his thought were cut off very quickly when the other suddenly pushed himself against chest, slamming him into the wall behind him with a force that reminded him that this boy was indeed almost as high a level of SOLDIER as he was._

_"What by Ifrit do you think you're doi…" but he didn't finish his sentence, the boy stopping his lip's movements by pressing a finger to them. He froze there then, stunned and indignant all at once._

"_She guides us to Bliss," the boy whispered, his eyes low "Bliss, bliss, bliss."_

"_I'll be your night friend," he assured and then drew the hand down the over his chin, along the centre line of his rib-cage Sephiroth wanted to push the offending limb away, and to shout at him for being so ridiculously odd. _

_He wanted to, so why didn't he? _

_His body was acting…strange. The feeling of Genesis against him, his breath against his face and neck, his hand on his sternum... it was so unusual. Goosebumps broke out on his skin and he felt his body rapidly becoming warm. And then the boy moved his hand more to the left and he knew he had to push him away this instant. And yet still didn't._

_Now the boy seemed to sense that he wasn't going to be rejected, and so became more bold with his ministrations. He pressed the palm of his hand over his left nipple and chuckled at the gasp this let out._

"_Genesis…" his voice was becoming hoarse and he felt that familiar feeling in his lower body, only he had never felt it so vividly. His groin was tightening, and something between an itch and an ache was developing. _

"_The bringer of life," the boy drawled as he began to fidget with the strings holding his haori together. Trying to gain control of the situation, the older teen pushed the younger's hands away from himself, keeping his arm out to make sure the boy wouldn't try to move back._

"_What do you think you're doing?" He demanded, trying to give his breathy voice some of its usual strength. Genesis really didn't possess the sanity to look sheepish as he tilted his head to the side._

"_I want to be your night friend," he explained in that all-to-calm voice, making it seem as though what he was saying was perfectly reasonable._

"_My…night friend?" Sephiroth narrowed his eyes. "Touch me again and I'll break your arm." _

_The boy's eyes widened and narrowed repeatedly for a long moment and he made an 'o' shape with his mouth. Not looking at all scared._

"_Oh, you don't know," he surmised softly, "I see. You don't know how She guides us to Bliss."_

"_Hnnnn" Sephiroth huffed in frustration. He was about to speak again when the other said something that took the sound from his throat._

"_Don't you want to be normal."_

_Normal?_

_Normal._

_Was he not…normal. They were always telling him he was unique, that he was an exceptional being destined for greatness. He was going to be a legend beyond anything ever seen before. Why would he want to be normal?_

_Why did he want to be normal?_

"_I d…" But Genesis stopped his word by tapping into his Mako enhanced speed and pushing him harshly against the counter this time. The auburn haired boy got over the impact before he did, already pressing a hand sharply on his chest by the time he'd caught his breath._

"_We can do as they do," he was whispering, bringing his mouth closer to his in a long movement that was somehow slow but rapid. Sephiroth's mind was in turmoil, he wanted to stop it, he knew he could if he tried, but for some reason he wasn't able to make himself do so. What was wrong with him?_

_Why wasn't he stopping it?_

_Was it because, for some reason, he couldn't stop looking at the way the green and yellow in the other's irises eyes danced and flickered this close? Because he couldn't draw his attention away from the way the boy's thick lashes brushed against his high cheekbones as his lids lowered, the way his lips bowed to make a dark crescent along his chin. He'd never realized before how perfect Genesis' face was, how well developed his muscles felt..._

_Questions, questions, questions. His world became nothing but questions. He wondered why Genesis was watching him the way he was, and why his expression finally made him stop trying to fight it. He wondered why, when the boy pressed their lips together and attempted to introduce his tongue to his mouth, he allowed it. Why the feeling of the hand slipping down his collar and stroking along his heating chest made him catch his breath before releasing it slowly. _

_It was... indescribable._

_Is this what humans felt? This primal, uncontrollable desire that made the mind fog over and gave way to strange, seemingly irrelevant thoughts. It was…strange and he should have tried to protest more, but there was something about the little shock he got when those fingers were drawn over his nipples, the way he felt a tingle shoot up his spine when the other began to draw a tongue over his pulse. _

"_Ah," _

_He slammed his hands against the counter when a knee was pushed straight between his legs, leaving the limb there to rub and move against him._

"_Ngggh," he ground his teeth against each other when his crotch began to tingle and ache, every movement bringing with it a new, strange, brilliant sensation all over his body._

_Suddenly he didn't care about anything, he didn't care about the consequences of his actions, about the fact that he was being exploited, about the fact that he wasn't…normal._

_She guides us to bliss _

_All inhibitions drifted away and in a flurry of motor neurons, adrenaline and testosterone as the two wrestled their way into his room, clothes and thoughts being lost along the way. He didn't know how, but for some reason the moment Genesis pushed him back and laid himself face down on the bed, he knew what he had to do._

_Following the other's instructions, he crawled on top of the bare form, taking time to wonder at the shining flesh covering the developing muscle, and the plump cheeks of the others ass. His member was hurting, and he wanted it to stop._

"_My friend, your desire. Is the bringer of life, the gift of the goddess." Genesis moaned and reached behind him so he could grab Sephiroth's hand. Once he had a grip, he pulled, unbalancing the silver haired teen and making him fall completely over him. Sephiroth made to get onto his knees again but Genesis shook his head._

"_Here." He placed a small, blue sachet in his hand, which he must have grabbed before removing his clothing. Clearly showing that he maintained more control in the situation than Sephiroth did._

"…" _he ripped the thing open and was confused at the contents. A black rubber hoop with transparent material attached._

"_Put it around, yourself," the other boy was moaning, and Sephiroth could see that one of his hands was working at something beneath his body. _

"_Around my… oh. Oh."_

"_Quick." He was hissed at. _

_It was fumbling and awkward, but eventually he managed to get the thing around that part of his anatomy was now bright red and pulsing._

"_Good," Genesis looked over at him before burying his face into the white pillow beneath him again._

"_Now," he spread his legs._

"_Enter me."_

_Breathing heavily, Sephiroth adjusted himself and then lowered his mid-section to follow the line of the dipped spine paralleled to it._

"_Nhhhh," he hissed as the head of his organ made contact with the flesh beneath him. "Ah…nhhhh."_

"_Yes," Genesis moaned, "further."_

_Nodding to himself, Sephiroth pushed his hips forward until they were aligned with the others entrance and stopped for a moment to make sure his covered organ was in the right place. At that moment though, Genesis jerked himself upwards and forced the unexpected organ to be skewer him._

"_Gaia!" They both shouted at once, one from complete pleasure, and the other from surprise… and pleasure._

"_Deeper. Bringer of life." Genesis cried._

_What followed was several minutes of rapid movements and ragged cries as Sephiroth experienced the closest thing he had ever felt to bliss in his entire life. Nothing compared, the adrenaline of a chase, the slaughter of a foe, the screaming crowds, all paled in comparison to the intensity of what he felt with Sephiroth at that moment. _

"_Ah, nggg." He almost swallowed his tongue as a sensation like none he had felt before took him. It felt like something was bursting and eventually the pressure accumulated until._

"_Ngggggn." He let out a long moan as the pressure released, via the liquid spurting from his cock. He didn't bother to notice how Genesis was also moaning in a similar fashion._

_Eventually the whole thing started to die down and his body was left a tingling and throbbing mess as he let himself fall on top of the other boy._

_They laid like that for what had to have only a few short minutes, before Genesis jerked his shoulders._

"_Up," he ordered; his voice flat and low. Sephiroth head spun as he pushed himself up and felt his flaccid organ slip free from the other. He rolled onto his back and looked at the redhead as he got to his feet._

"_You're leaving?" Genesis merely nodded, keeping his face away from him as he gathered his pants and shirt._

"_You can stay. I don't…"_

"_I have to leave." Genesis cut him off sharply and Sephiroth felt all the pleasure leave his body and a cold heavy feeling take its place._

"_Why did this happen?" He sat up and waited for Sephiroth to answer. After he had pulled on his shirt Genesis finally turned around to him and shrugged. _

"_Angeal is in Wutia."_

_The words hit Sephiroth like a bucket of ice water and he didn't say anything more as Genesis collected the rest of his clothing and then left the apartment._

_;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;_

"You just twist that to the right… yes."

Sephiroth leaned against the counter and watched the boy do as he was told. Cloud's eyes were staring diligently forward as he worked the dials and buttons on the needlessly complicated machine, looking very much like it was the most important thing in the world at that minute.

"Now press the black..."

The boy stood back when the dishwasher came to life with a series of splashing and whirring mechanics. He pressed his lips together and looked up at the taller man like a pupil looking for acceptance from a teacher. No, a headmaster.

"Good," Sephiroth gave it to him, pushing himself away from the counter. He put his hand on the boy's shoulder and looked around the now tidy kitchen, "you did well." Cloud nodded, giving a half-hearted look towards the machine again. His fingers twisted the hem of his sleeves until they were white.

"You did well." The older man repeated, offering him a small smile. A moment later all happiness fell from his face however, and he sighed while walking over to the sink; grabbing a glass and filling it with cool water. "I have quite a bit of paperwork to get through now and I'm afraid I've procrastinated for far too long."

Running the fingers of his left hand through his hair, he motioned the boy towards the kitchen door.

"It's too early for to go to bed though. So you can do your craft for a while, if you want," he suggested as they made their way through the large hallway

Cloud nodded and stopped walking to let the man reached forward and open the living room door for him. Sephiroth handed him the glass once they were inside and taking a breath, he tried his hardest to still his hands so that none of the liquid would be rippled over the delicate edge and onto the carpet.

The desk in front of the large window, put there only a month ago, was already badly congested with papers, folders, file cases and other mundane items which all beckoned the General to wallow in their misery for the night, but he gratefully bypassed it for a moment in order to make his way over to the mahogany closet in the corner of the room.

Cloud lowered himself to the ground behind the coffee-table, folding his legs underneath him and crossing his arms over the top, careful not to knock the glass he's just set down. He watched the tall man pull out a cardboard box from atop a shelf filled with others of the same, carrying it under one arm and closing the closet shut with the other.

He carefully opened the lid once his keeper had placed it on the table in before him. It was a figurine paint set. Sephiroth had begun buying him these a few weeks ago with the excuse that he felt the boy wasn't getting enough mental stimulation by just watching television all the time. Cloud was wary at first, because he had never really been much into painting, but to his surprised he found that that the hobby was quite... enjoyable. If that word existed anymore. There was something therapeutic about holding the little characters in your hand and painting life into their bodies, creating faces and styles that told of secret little souls hidden within the white clay. He... liked it. Even though his shaking hands made it difficult sometimes.

This set's theme was 'sky pirate battles' and he had about three quarters of it completed already.

Sephiroth felt something between contentment and arousal flood through his body as he watched his boy remove the figures and other items from the box. His small hands were holding the little clay figures so delicately, curling around them as though they would break if the air blew on them. He carried each little piece one by one, slowly, until they all stood together in a small line to the right, waiting to be animated.

It was sort of sad; the little people, and his boy working so hard to keep them from breaking.

Clouds lip was pushed outwards as he tried desperately to stop his hands from knocking or dropping anything around him. His shaking was quite bad now; the General made a not to look into possible remedies for that later.

But not now. He turned, begrudgingly, to make his way over to this most loathed station.

As soon as he began his own much more important work the hours flew by in a flurry of reports and digits, nothing holding very much interest. He was just preparing to complete one of the last papers on weapon updates when the shrill tone of his cell phone rang out into the air, making him slash an _e _and drag the ink too far across the border of page. Clicking his tongue in irritation, he set the pen down and brought the device to his ear.

"What?"

"_My friend, your desire_."

Irritated disinterest became rigid awareness in an instant. He pressed his teeth together and instinctively turned around to look at Cloud, who was sitting on the couch now, brushing the paintbrush against a half painted model. His hands were dotted in colour, the sleeves of his shirt pulled up around his elbows, showcasing the angular point of his thin wrist. Beautiful.

He held up his index finger at the boy and then got up and made his way out of the room.

"Genesis." His tone was harsh once he closed the door, and he didn't bother to keep the disdain from his voice now.

"_The fates are cruel…_"

"I will hang up."

The sound of static chuckling reached his ear, making him click his jaw.

"_Never one for manners, Sephiroth_."

"What do you need Genesis?"

"_Hn, so cold still?"_

"I'm working," pushing his long hair from his face, he walked through the hallway, his boots knocking against the tiled floor stormily.

"_You always are,_" was the drawling reply. The General rolled his eye upwards as he pushed the door to the kitchen open.

"Where are you Genesis? I assumed I wouldn't be hearing from you for quite a while." The glass bottle was warm in his hand as he pulled it down from its perch. He looked it over for a minute and then shifted his head so he could support the phone with his shoulder as his now free hand reached for one of the crystal snifters standing to attention in the press beside him.

"_I shall return tomorrow_."

If anyone were in the kitchen with him, they would have seen his expression switch from guarded interest to deadly awareness in the space of an instant. He slammed the bottle back down onto the counter, not caring that it was left uncorked and possibly cracked as he picked up the half-filled glass with stiff fingers.

"Why?"

"_The arrow has left the bow of the goddess."_

"Genesi-"

"return to where we last met. Tomorrow. I'll wait for you there."

He squeezed his eyes shut, willing his temper to settle, then pressed the phone against his forehead as he took a few seconds to compose himself.

He brought the receiver back to his mouth, so close that his breath made the plastic around the little holes turn dark and damp. "Tomorrow then. At dawn."

"_Even if the morrow is barren of promises. Nothing shall forestall…_"

"I'll see you then."

A low chuckle followed, and then nothing but the sound of static that his enhanced hearing picked up like a crack of a thundara.

He sighed, bringing the glass to his lips so he could taste the oaken bitterness. He wished the burning was more intense as it slid down his gullet, but it wasn't and it never would be.

He cleared away the bottle, which had indeed cracked and bled its contents all over the counter and floor beneath, and once he had filled his glass with what was left in it again, he made his way back to the living room.

He was not pleased with this. He didn't like the idea that Genesis had not gone far at all since he'd last seen him, that he'd been there all along, watching, plotting and waiting to strike. How much did he know, how much had he seen? He knew that if the man ever got a notion of what it was he was hiding out here among the snow and trees, the reason he had taken himself away from his former life, he would never let it go. He would try his very hardest tear it all away. Trouble followed Genesis, and he loved it back with all of his decaying heart.

He wouldn't tolerate either menace. His priority was one thing now, this yellow haired boy who was kneeling back on the floor when he walked back into the room, a line of shiny figurines standing in front of him, wet with new paint that smelled of petrol.

The boy's eyes followed him, slightly nervous, as he walked around to the front of the couch and took a seat, all the while his eyes staring straight forward, unblinking.

Pressing his lips together, the blond returned his attention back to the figures in front of him. He frowned when he noticed that the right paw of the Trance Kuja had a black smudge on it. He was extremely careful in moving the small creature towards him, then he picked the paintbrush from the glass it was resting in, shaking it in the water to clear the scrub, before dipping it in the cream paint.

Since Sephiroth had still not said anything, he decided to leave that figure out to dry and start another one.

The sudden heat against his back startled him, forcing the paintbrush to create a large smudge on the side of the small woman's face. He ignored his error and remained still and silent while the large arms wrapped around him and a strong chin dug into his left shoulder.

"They're good." Sephiroth's tone was higher than normal, and soft.

"Thanks."

Swallowing tightly, he pressed his lips together as the man exhaled heavily against his cheek, placing a kiss there afterwards.

"I don't like it when you say things you don't mean."

"Hm."

Another kiss to the side of his face, and then Sephiroth directed his attention towards the small figures on the table.

"You know, I've fought all of these creatures."

"And I was never afraid. Not even at the start," the man chuckled, the sound scratched, and a large hand descended upon the group of monsters, pointed nails catching the light from the bulb overhead. Like gleaming razors.

"You'd be surprised how incorrect everything I had learned in training proved to be." His long finger reached out to touch the top of a Tarui figures head, staining its tip. "This one, for example. Looks like a fighter, but it isn't his first instinct. In reality his defensive skills are average at best, and he sooner run and hide than face combat. I defeated my first one when I was thirteen."

The little statue fell onto its back with a quiet thud.

"I have fought true monsters in my life, and none of them are on this table."

Something about the statement made Cloud feel sick, and all he could do was nod stiffly while watching the lines of colours seep into each other all over the beasts fallen form.

Suddenly the man at his back pulled away, clearing his throat and taking an audible sip of a drink he hadn't noticed he'd brought with him.

"You'll be sleeping in your room tonight," he murmured down to him once he'd swallowed, "I have some work I need to do."

At one time Cloud would have been shocked at the rapid mood swings his... companion, seemed to suffer from, but at this point he'd grown so used to it that he barely felt anything beyond a mild puzzlement and a sinking feeling that something was drawing closer and closer to disaster.

Cool green eyes slid around the dark area so carefully that there was no chance the smallest movement would escape their notice within the orange and red architecture of these cold ruins. He walked further into the large space, his boots scratching only lightly on the filthy ground.

If it weren't for his enhanced vision, he wouldn't have been able to see a thing in this kind of darkness. Daylight hadn't broken yet. The snow outside was grey, the needles of the coniferous trees as black as hunting darts. In here the opaque had been reduced dozen of shades lower.

"It's not dawn yet."

He didn't even miss a breath, but just turned on his heel and offered a small smirk.

"No. It isn't."

Running his eyes over the other man, the smile quickly fainted.

"Genesis…"

The man stood before him, no longer beautiful. His once hazel hair was almost completely grey, white even; if it was able to stand out so well in the dark. It hung thinly from his scalp like sodden worms, sticking to skin that looked jaundice yellow and dark around the features.

"No longer," the man brought his eyes to meet his, and even though the eyelids were red and swollen, and the skin around them caved and hollowed so badly it wasn't even visible, they still stood out like two magnificent brown gems from a ruined visage.

"You're ill."

"_The wandering soul knows no rest." _His voice was hoarse and wet, as was his chuckle, and he slowly walked forward; his tall form hunched and off-balance in its movements, favouring the left more so than the right.

Although he didn't let his face portray it, Sephiroth felt nothing short of horror at the sight of what was once someone he would have called a friend, perhaps more. He noticed then, an envelope clutched in the man's too-thin fingers, but only took a passing interest in it.

"What has happened to you?" The wraith like figure walked up to him and placed a hand on his chest, which he allowed.

Genesis smiled, and the lower side of his chapped lip stated to bleed.

"It is good to see you, my friend."

He wished he could return the concept, truly, but Sephiroth could not fathom the state of the man in front of him.

"You need to return to Midgar," he cleared his throat, because his words were not coming out as clear as he wished.

Genesis laughed again, but it sounded bitter and more like a sob.

"_To a world that abhors you and I_?"

"The Shinra medical team can help you."

"_All that awaits you is a sombre morrow_."

"You're sick, you can't stay here like this."

"_No matter where the winds may blow."_

"Genesi-"

"I CANT GO BACK THERE!"

The remnants of the hoarse cry bounced off the metal all around them furiously, sending a flock of red bats into manic flight levels above them. Listening to the sound of their suicidal bangs and an orchestra of a thousand wings, they both stared at each-other for minutes of enraged regard. Genesis eyes, particularly were wide open and full of deranged desperation. He took in painful gulps of air and bent his body forward as he continued speaking.

"They diiiiid thiiiis," he drawled, punching his left hand against his sternum and grinding his teeth together, his eyes never leaving the General's. "They did this to all of us. Goddess…"

Closing his eyes for a moment, Sephiroth brought a gloved hand up to rub at his chin as his mind struggled to form the correct words.

"What have you learned," he finally asked, though he was sure that Genesis hadn't truly discovered anything, besides his own insanity.

"What have I learned?" Genesis voice became high pitched, and weak as he was he managed to raise his hands into the air and throw his head back in load, manacle laughter. "_War of the beast."_

"Genesis," he shot forward and slammed his hand down on the man's shoulder. He could feel the bone beneath the red leather, and removed his hand when he saw the other hiss in pain. Slowly Genesis looked up at him, his face now calm and weary.

"I have found," he whispered, his eyes looking into the distance, "the meaning of it all."

Slowly the hand that was holding the envelope lifted into the air and towards Sephiroth.

"What is that?" He mumbled, not taking the article yet.

"Homework."

He sighed, looking at the other for a minute before shaking his head and taking the envelope from him.

He turned away from the intense gaze and hastily pulled the sheets of paper from the already opened pocket.

"Where did you get these?" He asked idly as he took in the elderly appearance of the paper. He got no reply and with a click of his tongue began to read through the handwritten writing.

There was silence for about five minutes, give or take a minute, until finally he finally let his hand drop, his slap grip dangerously weak on the poison he'd just received.

"What is this?"

Genesis, who was now sitting on a low pipe, with his arms resting on his knees, looked up at him and scoffed.

"You know what it is."

"What does it mean?" His voice was without humour, and he narrowed his eyes at the wreck of a man.

"It means," Genesis drawled bitterly, "that we." He pointed at himself, then at Sephiroth. "Are monsters."

Monsters.

"Project S. Project G. I don't understand?" Sephiroth shook the paper in his hands. "What are they?"

"They are the reason you are a hero. And I am a failure."

"How?"

"We are not real," Genesis slowly pulled himself up and looked at the him with desperate unhappiness. "We are experiments."

_Experiments._

"Where did you get these?"

"We were created." Genesis continued. "In a lab. Conceived only so we could be turned into what we are today." He held his hands outward in a satirical display of himself.

"Jenova," Sephiroth read the word out loud from the page. "She was my mother. I was told that was the name of my dead mother."

"Mother," Genesis scoffed. "A calamity."

"Calamity?"

"Her cells. Were put into you. Into all of us. She was a thing from beyond this planet" Genesis walked up to him and tried to touch his bicep, but Sephiroth pushed him away.

"This is false," he insisted. The other shook his head, bringing his hands up to cover his face as he teetered back and forth as though drunk.

"_The bringer of life, the gift of the goddess_." He moaned. Then he pulled his hands away and Sephiroth could see the rage clouding his eyes.

"You," he hissed like a serpent from the lowest reaches of the planet, "were the success. Hero. Heeeroooo." He mouth curled upwards and into a sneer. "_Hero of the dawn. Healer of words. _Angeal. My beloved Angeal. He was almost…almost. But _you_ were perfect."

"I am no experiment," Sephiroth growled lowly, throwing the papers on the ground. "I am not made from cells. This is madness. You've gone mad."

"You're mothers name was Lucrecia Cresent. Your father was Hojo. He injected you're foetus with the calamities cells and made you what you are."

"Liar," Sephiroth bellowed, throwing the papers on the floor and marching to the door.

"I am _not_ an experiment."

"No, you are a hero," Genesis' voice followed him. "And I am the rubble left behind. The failure."

"You are SOLDIER."

"I'm breaking," he could hear the footsteps, but they were drowned out as soon as he pulled back the heavy metal door and let the sounds of the snow and wind offer their condolences.

"You've been broken for a long time. I see it now."

"My cells are disintegrating. I'm." A voice was close behind him now, coming with an unnerving series of loud, cheerful laughs. "I'm expiring."

"Expiring?" He looked out at the black trees, "You're dying."

"No." The other brushed his shoulder as he passed him, "I am not dying. Because I was not alive. Thiiiiings. Cannot die. They just break."

"Come back to Shinra," Sephiroth repeated, walking out after him, his feet sinking into the deep snow, "Professor Hojo-"

"Hojo," The word was whispered so lightly that a normal person wouldn't have heard it, not over this wind. But it was too strong, and too deadly, to go unnoticed.

"There is only one cure," he explained, now far out ahead of him, as he turned to face him again. He shuddered in the wind, took the ice into his own skin. Then he curled his finger in beckoning, and after a moment's hesitation Sephiroth crossed the distance to him. Soon they were standing chest to chest. One strong, one caving.

_"My soul, corrupted by vengeance._"

The deranged thing placed his hands on his neck, and smiled when he was not rejected.

"_Hath endured torment, to find the end of the journey."_

"Genesis."

But he didn't protest, and didn't move away, when the other leaned forward until their noses touched. He could smell his breath, and it belonged to a corpse

"_In my own salvation."_

The lips covered his own, just for a moment while Genesis closed his eyes. Then those beautiful brown orbs opened, and he could see the tears in them.

"_And your eternal slumber."_

He had just glimpsed the light shining from the others hand when a burning pain shot through the left side of his body. Widening his eyes, he looked down at the left side of his torso, and was not surprised to see the magic tendrils covering the blood soaked leather and skin.

Genesis stepped back and his face showed no emotion as he held his glowing sword in the air.

"You think you can challenge me?" He sighed flatly.

"_Legend shall speak," _Genesis hissed, his face scrunching up into a determined expression. "_Of sacrifice at world's end. _It was my destiny to become a hero. And if I don't defeat you I will be nothing, a failure. A thing."

With a loud cry he lunged forward, only to find himself slammed back into the ground .Once the smoked cleared he could see Sephiroth standing there, the Masamune held gracefully in his the air as though it were a part of his flesh.

"Stop this Genesis." Sephiroth repeated. "You cannot win."

"Why," Genesis slowly pushed himself back onto his feet slowly, "should you always get to be the hero?"

"I do not wished to be a hero." Sephiroth warned.

"Oh?" Genesis tilted his head.

Sephiroth felt the magic in the air, and braced himself as the others body began to glow a dark red.

The both lunged at the same time.

He straightened himself using the hand on his knee as leverage and blinked away the tears forming in his eyes; caused by the sting of the smoke and dust particles littering the air around him. His masamue dragged along the ground as he made his way through the debris scattered area, kicking away bits of bark and stone that had fallen during the clash.

As some of the dust settled he was able to make out more clearly the twitching form across the way. The man, Genesis, could barely be seen beneath the ruins of the mountain side that had collapsed onto him, strips of branches and falling snow working to hide the wreckage from sight like a natural cleaning agency.

He remained silent; his breathing heavy and ragged as he walked, and once he reached the crux of the chaos he said nothing, but simply watched as the fallen SOLDIER tried vainly to move himself out from under the heavy pieces of stone.

Eventually, after it become too pathetic to watch, he let his weapon fall to the side and knelt down.

"Genesis?" No reply. "Genesis."

A few more minutes of silence, and then.

"_The gi-ft o the goood-dess,_" his croaking voice sounded like the mountain had as it cracked away from itself; tearing cracking, and again the man tried to push himself upwards. But eventually he let out a shaky sigh and let himself back fully, all of his burden settling achingly back onto his stomach with a painful thump. He turned his face so his left cheek was pressing into the fluffy snow and Sephiroth was able to see a single hazel eye standing out from a grey and filthy face. A deep cut on the man's forehead bled heavily into a small puddle on the ground, melting down into the sludge.

"You… have… it," he said, painstakingly moving a bony finger to point at him.

"There is no gift. No goddess," Sephiroth sighed, pushing his hair back from his face and shaking his head, "can't you see that now?"

"No…"

"And look where it has led you," he clicked his tongue and then moved his hand closer to the other's face.

"God…ess."

"Genesis, it's not too late. I can take you back to Midgar. I have no desire to end it like…"

"No," the word was followed by a series of guttural coughs that made it sound as though the man was gurgling water in his throat. Not water though. A sense of guilt overtook Sephiroth and he couldn't help but put his arms under the man and finally pull him out from where he was trapped.

Genesis was gasping and struggling to catch his breath by the time he had him out and lying on his back with his head on his lap. The man's whole face was clenched in pain and his tears were creating red streaks through the dirt on his temples.

"Fail-ure."

Sephiroth looked to his left for a second, considering, and then looked down at him again.

"I have always been stronger. You couldn't win."

"You…"

"Let me take you back to Midgar. To Angeal."

"_Wiiiings strip- away. The e-nd is niiiiiiigh_."

Suddenly the whole body became limp against him. He had just enough time to cup the back of the man's head before it snapped back too far. Genesis' eyes rolled up, the irises disappearing from sight.

Suddenly sickening panic overtook him and he pulled the man closer to his face.

"Genesis…"

"Moooooo- ngh…giiiii ssssssss."

The sounds coming from the man's mouth were so illegible that he didn't bother to try make sense of them. He just sat and watched as the last ounce of colour drained from the already ashen face and the body went completely slack in his grasp.

"oooooooooonnnnn lasssssssssssssssss annnnnnnnncee."

"Do you hear me?"

"Eeeeee oooondddddddd annnnnnnnnnnnnnnceeee"

The words were once again cut off by a series of guttural coughs. They sounded worse than before and when the black green and red liquid began to fill his mouth and flow down his lips and chin Sephiroth knew it was over. He leaned the choking man forward to make it easier for him to get the stuff up and after a few minutes the ground all around them looked like the flavoured ice treats they sold to children in Costa del Sol. Genesis was unconscious, his breath weak and uneven.

Knowing that there was nothing to be done at that point, he pulled the body back against him and remained silent and calm while it went through its last stage of life, waiting there until it all emptied away. And even then he held him, not knowing if what he felt was pity, guilt, sadness or relief. Perhaps all of them together.

"I am sorry my friend."

He didn't know how much time had passed before he spoke, but the morning light was breaking over the landscape, bathing everything in its pale sterile light. The snow turned white, the mountains blue and the trees their fresh green again. He sighed, looking down at the limp form in his arms for another long minute; knowing that he wouldn't join the waking world again.

Being as gentle as he could, he moved his legs out from underneath the body and placed it carefully on the ground, taking a few minutes to position the head properly.

"You never had a chance."

He then stood up himself and after another long, expressionless glance at the still form, made his way over the damaged landscape that was already beginning to correct itself with a light shower.

The sheets lay there on the ground when he walked back into the reactor, remaining defiantly bright even among the filth and dust. He eyed them with a taste of bitterness in his mouth and then walked quickly forward to snatch them up, not caring that he was damaging the already frail paper. They were the cause of this. They were the cause of what had happened. Lies. Filthy, miserable lies.

It was snowing heavier when he went back outside but it wasn't cold enough to affect him. He looked over in the direction of where he'd just murdered his best friend; internally deciding in that instant that burning the body, and the land around it, would be best. Fire was the best. Fire would erase it all, fire would end the pain. Fire was the most powerful gift given to man. He put his hand into the section of his coat where he kept his materia but cursed when his fingers found nothing but leather.

"Fuck!" Snow spat from his lips. He shook his head.

Well, it wasn't a area was never visited; there was time to go back and get what he needed. There was no problem. All was fine.

_Experiment_

He clicked his jaw and turned to make his way down the hill, his boots crunching against the step. His strides were long and his gait heavy but he was still graceful and perfectly coordinated in his movements.

_Jenova. A calamity._

"Hm," he cleared his throat and blinked away the sudden wave of dizziness that overtook him. It was only at that moment he felt the sting of where Genesis had driven his sword into his right side, beneath his ribs. Nothing serious, but couldn't be healed by Mako alone.

_Project S_

He closed his eyes to clear away the words from his head and when he opened them again he barely had time to stop himself from slamming into the thick bark of a tree. He had reached the woods. At first he was angry at himself for his lack of attention, but then the humour of it struck him. Walking into a tree. The great General Sephiroth walking into a tree. A grin broke out on his face and it was only moments before he was hunched over with his hands on his knees, his body wracked with laughter that made the blood spurt out quicker from his wounds.

"Ha ha ha…"

The great General Sephiroth…

_An Experiment. Cells. Jenova._

"Stoooooooooooop!" With his body still hunched over he grabbed his head with both hands and pulled at his hair. Drip, drip, drip. Blood in the snow.

_Mother_

He pulled himself upwards and then tugged the paper hastily from his pocket. His eyes scanned over the words fast and as every letter sank into his brain the sickening, boiling feeling in his stomach intensified.

_Jenova. Calamity. Experiment. Cells. Project S. Strains. Calamity. Lucretia. Jenova. Mother._

He pushed the paper back into his pocket and the rest of journey was a blur until he reached that familiar sight of his house. His home.

The heat hit him as soon as he opened the door and he stopped there only for a second to leave his masaume against the wall before walking further into the hall. He looked at the stairs and knew that that's where he should be going. To get the fire materia. To burn the evidence. The memories. Burn it all away.

Mother

But instead he found himself turning left and walking towards that all too familiar bookcase.

_Jenova. Experiment_.

The key was hidden on the top shelf and he took it and unlocked the door quickly. The smell hit him first. As it always did. The smell of his boy. He was such a perfect boy. It didn't matter when Sephiroth was with his boy. His past was nothing before his boy. None of it mattered. None of it.

_Project S. Enhanced abilities. Cells. Calamity._

"Shhhhh" he murmured as he walked further into the dark room.

He found Cloud still sleeping in his bed, the thick blanket pulled up to his chin and one hand curled under the pillow. It was no new sight, certainly, but it still made Sephiroth stop and stare and think of how lucky he was to own such a beautiful creature. He was lucky. Cloud was his. They wouldn't take him away.

He walked over and then sat down on the bed. The movement of the mattress made the boy grunt something in his sleep but didn't wake him. Normally Sephiroth would let him sleep, but that morning he felt his patience had run thin.

"Cloud," he shook the boy, slightly hard, by his shoulder. It did the trick because the boy's eyes snapped open in surprise and he took a few seconds to register what was happening. Eventually those large perfect blue eyes landed on him. With the door open there was just enough light in the room for Cloud to see the state he was in. His clothes were dishevelled and ripped, his skin and hair was matted with dirt and dust and he had a large wound on the right side of his stomach which was bleeding heavily onto the blankets. A far stretch from his normally immaculate self.

"Se- what happened?" The boy asked, his eyes drawn to the blood on his stomach. Sephiroth didn't answer him but instead leaned forward to run his fingers though his hair. Cloud went tense but remained still as he played his fingers through the blond locks, fascinated by the way they left trails of red and black in it.

"You're bleeding," the boy eventually said, very softly. Sephiroth merely grunted as his fingers slipped down to run along the sides of his love's face.

"I've had an eventful morning," he said, and then chuckled at his statement.

"You should… clean that. It look's bad," Cloud said nervously, meekly making eye contact with him. Sephiroth felt himself become angry all of a sudden, and the look on the boy's face only fuelled it.

"Really?" He snapped, making Cloud flinch a bit in surprise. "Are you so concerned for me?" A mocking grin spread across his face as he leaned into the boy until their noses almost touched.

"…" Cloud remained silent, clearly uncertain, and Sephiroth tutted at him, moving away again.

"Oh no," he said, his fingers moving to work at the straps in the front of his jacket. "You're not concerned. Hm, you just want me to go treat my wound instead of touching you're precious body." Once the straps were undone it was a simple matter of sliding the leather from his shoulders and leaving it to drop on the floor. Cloud's eyes widened at the sight of the bloody gash but he didn't say anything.

"Isn't that true?" He asked. Cloud looked up at his face and Sephiroth could see that he was frightened. But he didn't really care, because the boy was being cruel to him again. Did he care for him at all?

"Is it true?" He said, louder. Cloud mouth moved silently for several seconds and Sephiroth waited impatiently.

"Talk." He ordered.

"I… it."

"Speak. Is it true?"

"I. No. No."

The slap was so hard that it forced the boy across the bed and against the hard wall. Adreneline pumped through Sephiroth's veins as he watched the boy collapse face down onto the pillow, one hand moving to touch where his head had impacted with the hard concrete.

"That was for lying," he said flatly, "Do you understand? That was for always being so cruel."

Cloud nodded, keeping his face hidden.

Another bout of dizziness overtook Sephiroth and he shook it away before getting on his hands and knees and crawling the short distance towards the cowering boy. He positioned his body so it was on top of Cloud's smaller one, his knees at either side of his thighs and then lay down fully. His wound stung as it touched the cloth covering the boy's back but he ignored it and brushed the hair back from Clouds ear.

"Lies cause harm Cloud. You cannot lie," he whispered, tapping his finger against the boy's cheekbone.

His lover didn't say anything back to that, and he remained silent when Sephiroth pulled his shorts down and took him gently and slowly. He was so good now. The perfect boy.

But Sephiroth could not appreciate the act as he normally would have. The moment kept leaving him, pushing him into dizzy whiteness where letters flew across the air like hovering insects. He was happy when the darkness eventually came, taking him away from the awful words with their stinging truths. Away from memories, death and lies.

**Mother  
**  
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Cloud swallowed, holding his bottom lip tightly between his teeth as he slowly moved his body against the mattress, his eyes on the sleeping man all the time.

The smell of blood and some strange chemical mixed through made his stomach churn, but he forced himself to breathe through his lips as he finally got himself out from under the heavy body and slowly turned himself around to his other side

It was only then that his eyes widened to the point of pain, and a heavy jolt of disbelief shot through him, sending all his insides into uproar.

Across the room, his blue room, at the top of those stairs, those awful stairs, light shone down to him.

Light from the open doorway.


	30. XXX

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

**This fan fiction contains dark, upsetting psychological and sexual themes so if you are not comfortable with that kind of thing then please don't read because I don't want to upset anyone.**

**Hey, new chapter finally, and of a Sunday too! This one took me a while as I had to try to do it in small bouts between working and my… life, but I'm so happy to finally be putting it out.**

**Thanks for all the reviews and favs for the last chapter, they make me so happy and I really appreciate them!**

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It was open.

The door was open.

There it was, at the top of the stairs, streaming light into the dull room in a single block-like prism that was in no way affected by anything around it; an entity in the darkness that was at the same time excluded from it.

There it was; open.

Could anything in the world compare to the sight of it? Was there any other inanimate object that could offer such a world of possibilities and temptations and terror to the mind? Jewels, materia, magic… none of them meant anything.

Cloud let out a long, tense breath, his eyes unwaveringly fixed on the sight of it. Very subtly he shifted himself, just testing. The arm on top of him moved a small bit, but only because of his ministrations and not by any will of its owner. He moved again, more prominently this time. Nothing.

Taking another deep breath, he looked up the stairs again, their wood a mix of silver and shadows in the intruding morning illumination. He didn't know what to do with this… Sephiroth would be so mad if he tried to run away. He would kill him. He would torture him first, and then kill him. He should just stay as he was now, until the man woke up. It was the safest thing to do.

But how could he ignore this chance? How could he let it pass? The door was open and Sephiroth seemed to be completely unconscious. How could he be such a coward as to ignore this double fortune? It was his only chance, the only chance he'd been offered in all this time, probably the only one he'd receive for years to come. Sephiroth would never make this mistake again, he'd learn from it as all do from the same and his grip on him would tighten impossibly more.

But for now he was out cold, he mightn't wake for hours. Cloud could be rescued by then. Gaia, was that possible? Could this all lead to him being back with his mom and friends?

He felt his chest sink in.

No, not his mom.

Suddenly the room seemed to darken around him more, the gap in the wall shrinking into itself like chugging quicksand.

He would never be with her again no matter what he did now, and the rest of the idea was just as impossible. He shouldn't think it. He shouldn't be so naïve. There was no way that would happen. It was a dream. A fairy-tale. He would never get back to his old life now. It was too late. Sephiroth would wake up. And he would find him in a second. And he would be so mad. He would be furious. He'd hurt him. Kill him. Torture him for weeks on end until he begged for it to all go away...

So he wished whole-heartedly that this chance hadn't been offered up to him at all. Living with nothing was easy; living without an alternative to misery. There was nothing to do then but endure it, no thought towards anything else.

But this... this invasion of hope. That awful, cruel thing that shone so prettily in front of his eyes. That was true evil. It would hurt him so much that there would be no coming back from it, so what was the point in facing all of that pain for nothing?

He shook his head, because he knew that was wrong. It wasn't nothing. His life wasn't nothing. This was his one chance in over a year to escape this hell. He could be safe, away from this man and everything he'd done. All he had to do was try. If he failed then what was there to lose? What could be worse than what he had already suffered?

"Gaia," he whispered, knuckling his eyes with his left hand. His head hurt, his soul hurt. He had to decide now, before the decision was made for him, so looking at the door again, he bit the inside of his cheek in thought, then-

"S... Sephiroth," His breath caught in his throat after he said the name lowly. He waited for a response with baited breath. None came.

"Sephiroth?" A bit louder now, and with a small shift of his body. Nothing; the man was out cold, his wound must have been worse than he'd anticipated. There was so much blood after all.

"Sephiroth." One more time, just to be safe. Nothing again. Cloud felt his heat thrum against his chest as he slowly lifted his head from the pillow Both were covered in sweat, and as he pulled himself into a sitting position he realized that the rest of his body was no different. Sweat and blood.

Every sound jarred against his eardrums as he caused them, the rustling fabric, the squeaking of the mattress springs, the slipping of the pillow from under him. He stiffly sat up straighter, and stopped there to wait expectantly, almost hopefully, for the man beside him to wake up and pull him back down, to end this absurdity now. But it didn't happen no matter how long he waited like that. Sephiroth continued to lay like a great dead thing beside him, his hair covering most of his face and torso, it and his bare skin all stained a horrible deep crimson, especially around the middle where the tendrils and sheets glistened in fresh soddeness still. But Cloud could still make out the soft, even movements of his chest, the flexing of thick muscles along his arms and legs. Not dead but very asleep.

His captor had never slept so soundly before, always possessing the disposition to wake at the slightest catalyst, so Cloud knew that the wound plaguing him now must have been very serious indeed, something that no ordinary man would have hoped to survive. He wondered what had caused it, and if it was something he himself needed to be afraid of. But he didn't feel afraid for his life in that way, there were worse things to be afraid of than monsters and pain.

His bones felt like stone as he slowly started to push the large arm from around his waist, clenching his lips tightly together from the tension. He successfully got the limb off of him and onto the mattress between them without incident and then closing his eyes, he took a moment to calm his body and gather his thoughts. This was it.

Gaia, should he just stop now before it was too late?

But as the idea passed through his mind he knew there was no way he would follow it. He couldn't. He had to take his chance no matter what the consequences were.

He was still afraid though, and his whole body shook as he slowly moved himself around so his legs were hanging off the side of the bed, his toes brushing against the carpet.

"Here we go," he whispered to himself and then with another deep breath he stood up, grimacing as the mattress creaked from the loss of his weight. He stood there for about a minute, eyes closed and ears straining to detect any sound that could tell him that the man was waking up. When that didn't come he relaxed his face but then winced when his sore jaw was jarred. It felt broken. He had to leave.

Quietly as he could, he tiptoed across his room until he reached the wardrobe. Slowly and carefully he pulled the wooden doors open. The sight of the pressed, folded linen shirts and shorts made his brow furrow and he quickly gathered the only clothing that differed from them. It was the outfit Sephiroth had bought him for when they went outside, the only thing that would give him a chance of surviving that kind of cold.

Gathering the clothing to his chest again, he looked back at the bed where the un-moving form of his tormentor lay. The sight of that large, slumbering body filled the boy with a dread so pure he felt stifled with it. It was like being in a cage with a slumbering beast that could wake any moment and tear him to pieces.

Gaia, why was he doing this? He was going to get caught.

Shaking the thoughts away, the teen turned to look in the direction of the stairs. They looked taller than usual now, and much more ominous. But this was the point of no return. He could either stay here and face months, perhaps years, of fear, depression, sickness and all things bad, or he could go up there and face hardship, punishment, possible death, for that small ounce of hope that he would be saved. It was a grim choice; but he knew which one to choose.

Again he was quiet as he walked across the room, keeping his clothing pressed safely to his chest as he approached the end of the stairway. His heart was in his throat but he managed to make himself ignore it and lift his leg. The feeling of the cool wood beneath his foot when he finally lowered it on that first step was like a burst of cold water on his face. It was refreshing. Hopeful. Looking over at the bed again, he mustered up enough courage to continue on.

The whiteness of the main hall always stung his eyes when he entered it, and this time was no exception. It was so different to his room, so completely opposite in terms of colour and touch that it was hard to believe they were situated within the same vicinity as each-other. But that was the crux of this whole thing wasn't it. Hells can be disguised as heavens, pain as bliss, the fields of Elysium shown to you from the depths of the underworld. Now he felt that promise being offered to him, and knew that there was a cruel faith to come.

He walked out onto the tiles in his bare feet, still consciously attempting to be as quiet as he could, ever aware of Sephiroth's enhancements as ventured, for the first time in over a year, out of the room by himself. He allowed himself a few seconds to calm down and take everything in, before the more logical side of his mind told him that he would have to move faster now. He had wasted too much time already.

He didn't have shorts on so the thick snow pants were easily pulled up his dirtied legs and fastened around his waist. He then pulled on the woollen jumper over the long, blood stained shirt, because extra layers wouldn't hurt, before putting on the thick ski coat and zipping it up to his chin. The thick socks and gloves were the last to go on before he straightened up and glanced back at the door he had come through, wondering if he should close it.

No, if Sephiroth woke up he'd…

"Huh," he scoffed at himself. If Sephiroth woke up he'd have a lot more to be mad about than just the door, so he left it and moved on.

His movements were rushed but his eyes still had time to glance up at the ceiling in his short walk. That horribly painted ceiling, with all its false images of an unreal paradise, where servants were forced to play music all day long for the sinful and immoral people who lounged about without modesty and committed acts of sin and evil for everyone to see. Ugly, distorted creatures that looked nothing like babies flew around with small wings attached to their fat, bent backs. It was horrible. Everything about this place was horrible.

He made his way out into the next small hallway and a pang of nervousness hit his stomach when he saw the looming figure of the front door ahead of him. Did it always look so big? He swallowed his fear and strode quickly across to it, relived to see that his boots were in the same place they had been after their last walk; beside the door in the small wicker basket, and went about fastening them on as fast as he could. His eyes caught sight of Sephiroth's masamune leaning against the wall beside him. The famous weapon of the great General Sephiroth. He and almost every other boy he knew had owned numerous toy versions of the sword during their childhood, and he had always chosen it when playing video games and so on. It was a symbol of strength and honour in their culture, a symbol of Sephiroth himself. And so to see it now, dirty and blood stained, leaning against the wall like any other discarded object, just proved to the boy once again how disillusioned and naive he and everyone else had been.

With the heavy boots tied and his hood pulled up to cover most of his face, Cloud was ready to go outside. He tried the handle and was relieved to see that the door wasn't locked. It pushed open with ease and the boy only barely felt the cold hit him as he walked through the threshold.

His nervousness was in full swing now as he closed the door as quietly as he could. He had only gotten a few feet away from it before his mind started to turn again, probably in response to the reality of where he stood, with the landscape of trees and snow stretching for miles around him like a natural cage. What was he doing? Gaia, he shouldn't be doing this. Sephiroth would kill him. He would be so mad. And what was the point? There was nothing but snow ahead of him. He'd probably freeze to death before he found anything.

"No," he whispered, wrapping his arms around his middle as his stomach started to spoil with worry. "No, no, no no, no." He clenched his teeth and looked back at the house.

"I should go back. Okay. No." He thought he was going to vomit. Why did he do this? Gaia, he was stupid.

"Just go back…" Making up his mind, he turned back the way he came. However, he had only taken about three steps when his body stopped again.

"No," he shook his head. What was he thinking? Go back? And what? Take off his clothes; get back into bed beside that man? No way. What punishment could be worse?

"Okay stop. It's okay. It's okay. C'mon." And so he turned back around and continued the way he had first been going. It wasn't snowing now, luckily, but the ground was sludgy and his feet sunk several inches into it with every step, making walking more of an effort than was fair.

He didn't know which direction was the best to take either, or if there was anything but snow and fields for miles, but he decided to start by walking along the same route he had walked with Sephiroth, where a ghost of a path seemed to pave the way.

His heart was beating at a hundred miles an hour and while he was walking his unoccupied mind ran over everything that was happening again and again. He couldn't quite fathom that this was actually real. He was out of that house, on his own, trying to get home. It was crazy; ridiculous. He never thought this would happen.

And any minute now, he was sure the man was going to appear behind him and drag him back. Any minute he would wake up and see that he was gone and come looking for him, which wouldn't be a difficult task. Cloud dearly wished he could run, his whole body was craving it, but he physically couldn't do it with the weight of his boots and the smudginess of the snow. The most he could do was clench his fists and take the biggest steps he could. He just had to hope that the man would sleep for another few hours.

"Wasted too much time." He whispered to himself.

He reached the woods in about a half an hour, and stopped to take a break while he considered his next move. This was normally the point where he and Sephiroth would turn back, so he had no clue what was beyond this point. How large were the woods? Did it stretch for miles and miles? He wasn't sure because from the house it was difficult to see anything in the distance due to the constant snowy fog. He had to go in, he supposed, there was no other choice but he was still afraid. There was a fairly good chance that the forest was miles long, and that he would freeze before ever making it out.

"Gaia," he sighed, then without further thought the boy took his first step into the Modoeheim forest.

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He could barely feel his fingers, and now his feet were starting to tingle with the first signs of numbness as well. He clasped his hands together in front of him and tried to massage warmth back into the digits through natural friction, but it wasn't working very well. He'd been walking for what must have been over two hours now, and his body was beginning to feel the strain in a bad way.

He slitted his eyes, which were red and stinging from the cold, and tried to peer forward. But yet again all could see through the blurry water and blinding paleness was the undesirable shapes of the endless trees in front of him, behind him, to his right, his left, and not for the first time during the hike, the thought came to him that he had made a huge mistake.

"Hhh," the back of his throat stung from rawness and he nestled his face in further to the high collar of the coat to avoid breathing in any more cold air or exposing the skin of his neck to it. His tongue felt like sandpaper in his dry mouth, and he wondered why he hadn't thought to bring some water with him.

Shaking his head at himself, he walked forward a further few minutes before a stitch in his right side told him he needed to take a break.

A tree with particularly thick, winding roots served to be his resting place and he let his body slump against the hard bark with a quiet groan. Gaia, he was thirsty. Why didn't he think to get a drink? And some food too. His energy was draining fast, and his strength was the only thing he had to rely on out here.

"Gaia," he whispered, clasping his fingers together until the bones grated against each other. He shouldn't have left. All that stuff about death being better than staying in that prison seemed like false bravado now, when faced with the reality of it. He didn't want to die, and there was a good possibility that he would by the end of the day.

"Stop," the thought made his stomach clench so he tried vainly to will it away. But the question kept coming back to him no matter how far he pushed it away. Would he die today? Would he just stop being?

An intrusion to this morbid streaming, by no means a welcome one, came when something to his left made a loud clicking sound, like a branch being snapped. His body went stock still in an instant, all thoughts seeping away, and he tried to breathe as softly as he could while listening out for more.

He pressed his lips together, his whole body flashing warm. It was just the wind, he hummed to himself. It was just the wind. He was in a forest, forests make noise. Just the wind.

But the noise came again moments later, and again. Something was walking on the other side of the tree!

He slowly moved his hands to his head and clenched his wide eyes shut, hoping that whatever the hell it was would pass. What was it? A monster? That was another thing he hadn't considered when leaving the house, monsters, and though he'd been lucky so far there was a high chance of encountering one at any point.

Then the thought came to him, as he kept his eyes closed and prayed for whatever it was to just go away, that it mightn't have been a monster at all, at least not a beast. Was it...? It couldn't. It couldn't be. Which would be worse, Sephiroth or a monster? Was there a difference?

But the movements got louder and more hectic very quickly and it became clear to the blond that it was not Sephiroth behind the tree. He wouldn't make any noise at all, much less this rummaging racket.

This was confirmed when a new noise started up, a low, heavy breathing through a thick throat. Panting. An animal.

It was at the other side of the tree; he could hear it sniffing around the bark and snow. It would only be a matter of time before it came around. He had to move.

Bracing his hand against the root beneath him, and his other against the bark of the tree, he slowly and quietly got to his feet. His stomach churned in terror and fear and he felt sweat starting to gather beneath his clothes. He could barely breathe. His heart was pounding so loudly by now, making it difficult to listen to the beast's movements. He heard it shift again and knew it was coming around the left side, and so he began to inch to the right. Slowly and quietly.

Eventually he got to the side of the tree, and he continued moving until he was almost at the back. He shut his eyes tightly and flattened himself against the cool bark, praying to any God or Goddess out there that the beast would move along. Please move along. Please go away.

And of course, like every other prayer he had said in the last few months, it went unanswered. Something touched his shoulder, scratching against the waterproof material of his padded coat sleeve and in shock he opened his eyes to see a strange, tail-like thing with a pointed end rubbing against him. Two seconds later he heard the loud growling and he didn't wait any longer to see anything else.

Lethargy forgotten, he turned and bolted away from the tree as fast as his body could possibly move in the heavy snow gear. The familiar feelings of panic and fear took over his whole body as he heard the growling and rapid movements behind him, his whole form roaring within himself as the wind rushed past his ears and pelted against his face. He could still hear, at a terribly voluminous level, the thing following after him. Its paws thumping against the ground twice a second . It was big, whatever it was, and it was fast. He was going to die. He was going to die.

"Nhh," he clenched his teeth together and forced his body forward faster than he thought possible in the heavy boots, feeling tears sting his eyes for several different reasons. Gaia, why did he leave the house? He was just going to die now on his own in the middle of the woods. There was no way he could outrun this thing for long. Why hadn't he brought some kind of weapon with him? He was going to die.

It was a difficult task to keep his pace and avoid the trees and large bushes blocking his path, knowing that if he got knocked back he was dead. Several times he heard the creature behind him thud against something, and figured that it was having the same problem, which was probably the only thing keeping him at a distance at all.

A particularly large tree stood in the path ahead of him. His survival instincts must have kicked in because before he knew it he had reached out an arm and swung himself around the thick bark, continuing his run in a more diagonal direction. The sound of the creatures howl of pain as it's body collided with the frozen wood followed a few seconds later but he didn't stop to congratulate himself. Taking advantage of the larger distance he had created, he resumed running at full speed, taking note that he was now running downhill. There were more bushes and ferns around him now, and less tall trees. They were easier to run straight through but they had thin branches and thorns that cut at his face and whipped his clothes viciously as he broke through them.

The loud moan-like sound filled the air and made his skin prickle. He knew the creature was after him again, perhaps more determined now that he'd been agitated. It sounded like a hound of some sort. Like a guard hound. Gaia, it would rip him to pieces.

"Ple…ase," he whispered breathlessly, his voice cracking. "Ple- ase help me. Somebod..y."

It was so hard to run on the snow, and with his boots as heavy as they were. Had adrenaline not been running through his veins, he was sure he'd be in the worst kind of agony at this stage. As it was, his chest was beginning to ache and his eyes were burning to blindness. He had to keep running though, or else he was dead.

It was catching up to him again; he could hear its frantic breathing. It would catch him in a minute. Gaia, it would catch him. He had to think of something.

The idea came to him in a second, and that was about the amount of time he had to pull it off, because the beast was just at his heels now. Again he targeted a large tree in front of him, one of the last few, and again he stretched his arm out ready to swing around it. This time when he approached the tree however, he did a full 180 degree turn around the bark. The beast saw his movement at the last minute, but its attempts to stop itself so suddenly made it clumsy and it skidded past Cloud and stumbled several feet down the hill before crashing into something.

Taking a deep breath, the teen pushed himself away from the tree and ran to the left. It was more difficult than running downhill and the snow and hidden roots in the ground almost made him trip several times. He still managed to get a good distance away from the hound though, and knew that he had to quickly find a place to hide before it caught up to him again. He couldn't outrun it, so he looked around hectically while trying to keep to the shadows of the trees as much as he could.

Seconds later the boy blearily sighted a gathering of thick snow-covered bushes a small bit away from him.

A loud growl shot through the air from a distance behind him with as much tenacity as a gunshot, and it was all the incentive he needed to lunge forward and scramble on his hands and knees towards the large mass of leaves and snow. The thin wiry branches clawed at him and got caught on his clothes but it didn't slow him down as he made his way to the centre of the plant where there was enough space for him to sit in a scrunched up ball.

Sweat was streaming down his face, his heart hammered frenziedly against his ribcage and his breathing was strained and uneasy, but he tried his hardest to keep quiet. After a few seconds he heard the beast approach, and squeezed his arms tighter around his knees to relieve the tension he felt. He couldn't really see through the leaves surrounding him, but he could vaguely make out the black form of the large hound through the sparse gaps.

It was running, not quite as fast as before, and when it passed the bush Clouds whole body stiffened in tension, only to loosen moments later when the creature ran straight past him and continued on away.

His footsteps filled the gaps between his own internal pulsing, creating a violent harmony that he didn't think he'd ever forget.

It was probably ten minutes before the boy felt safe enough to relax himself a small bit. He let his arms fall to his sides and his legs spread out farther in the cramped space. The adrenaline was wearing off now and his whole body was feeling it. His lungs ached, his throat and head hurt and the pain in both of his legs was fast becoming unbearable. He was sweating like a tap under his clothes and the whole thing was making him feel desperately miserable.

He was afraid.

He tried to distract himself by rubbing his thighs to loosen the muscles. But it was a vain effort and within a minute he had both hands pressed to his face as he sobbed quietly into them, still to nervous to make them anything above audible. He didn't want to be here anymore. He was so afraid. Terrified. He had just almost been…ripped apart by a monster. He'd almost been killed by a monster! He couldn't take this anymore. He couldn't handle all this terror.

What had he been thinking? How did he think he could survive this? There was no way he was going to get out of here, Gaia knew how many miles this forest covered, how many more beasts it sheltered in the shadows of its thorns and snarls. He was going to die today.

As he looked around himself the reality of the whole situation really kicked in and he began crying even harder, making sound now and not caring about it. What had happened in his life that he ended up here, on his own with all these choices to make? He was so afraid. He was always afraid now. What was the point in being alive when all you feel is fear and loneliness and depression? Everything that had happened to him in the past year… was there a way past it?

He couldn't imagine a time before any of this happened. Even though he had set out to be rescued that morning, his mind didn't hold any real hope that he would be saved. It couldn't comprehend him being anywhere but here, feeling anything but these feelings. Because he'd been broken. This was what a broken person felt like. This is what Sephiroth had done to him. Because Sephiroth was broken too, and he knew no other way to behave than the way he did. He didn't know anything else.

But though broken, and fed up and so, so sad, Cloud knew that part of his fear derived from the fact that he really didn't want to die. Even after everything that had happened, he wanted life. And he wasn't going to just sit here and cry until the cold knocked him out or some other monster smelt his tears. He had to keep going. And he would eventually. He just needed some time to feel safe and to calm himself.

He rubbed the back of his hand across his nose and leaned back against the thick core of the bush, allowing his body and lungs to relax.

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_Jack. Jack. It's all coming to an end._

**I have training at 6:00. Leave me alone.**

_You have to wake up Jack. It's going to be too late if you don't realize soon._

**I don't care anymore. I don't care. Just leave me alone.**

_Jack..._

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He ran his dry tongue across his bottom lip, not paying attention to how chapped it was. His whole mouth was starched and stinging and his throat felt like it had been scratched raw from the other side. His slitted eyes looked down towards the ground. The idea of melting the snow and drinking it had come to him several times already, but the logical side of his mind had told him that it wasn't a good idea. It would freeze his insides and he was vulnerable enough to the cold as it was.

Pulling his tongue back into his mouth, he knew that he wouldn't be feeling so logical soon.

He took in a breath through his nose and continued walking, trying to be as soundless as he could and keeping to the bushes and trees instead of walking between them, ready to hide himself at the smallest twitch of noise.

He held a branch over his head and ducked under it before letting it go and continuing on. His hands were completely numb now, and more alarmingly his back was beginning to feel chilled along the middle. Perhaps he shouldn't have worn the bloody shirt after all; it might not have been completely dry...

It had been less than an hour since he had left the safety of his hiding place, and already his body was straining under the atypical conditions it had to endure. He doubted he would last like this until the end of the day. And if he did…night would be so much worse.

A sharp jolt of fear struck his stomach and he willed it away, telling himself that there was no use in thinking like that now. To take everything as it came.

As he walked, downhill all the time, he noticed that the spaces between the trees were getting larger, and that there were more ferns here now than anything. It had started a while back but now he could see that not only were there far less trees, but what were here was also much thinner than the ones further up.

It was while he was thinking over the relevance of this when he heard a soft, buzzing sound. Like a phone vibrating. He started at the occurrence of it and his heartbeat began to speed up very quickly. He drew himself closer to a tree beside him and listened for the sound, his bloodshot eyes wide in fear as he tried to think of what type of creatures hummed. Bite Bugs? No, they were in Balamb... Nio Hums?

To his horror the sound didn't go away the more he listened, but in fact grew louder and more solid.

Buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

He pushed himself further into the bushes at his side and looked around for another place to hide. There was nothing here, only thin trees and smooth ground. He would have to run. But he didn't think he could anymore, his legs were on fire.

As the noise got closer it became clearer and more decipherable in its components. It wasn't so much buzzing, he realized shortly, as it was clinking and chugging. Like an…

He pushed himself away from the tree and clumsily ran a few steps forward, his eyes wide and searching.

Suddenly he could see it in the distance, not forty yards away. It was a vehicle of some sort. A bike or a scooter, painted a bright yellow with black lines striping across its front so it was easily seen in among the snow. A vehicle. And if it was a vehicle, then that meant someone had to controlling it.

They were. He could see them. Only a blur of green from where he was but still a person all the same. Another person. He couldn't believe it.

Cloud's mind was in a complete whirlwind as he forced his throbbing legs to hurry down the slope, taking large breaths and using the trees to move him forward. He wanted to move much faster, but his body wouldn't allow it. It was frustrating.

The bike didn't have the same problem as he and it was moving at a quick pace, nearly directly in front of him now.

"Wa…it," he tried to call, but his voice was damaged from the cold and his word's barely above a whisper. "Stooooooo-op. Ple…se."

Giving up on trying to alert the person orally, he focused on reaching them before it was too late. He pushed himself forward until he had to grit his teeth with effort, but it was worth it because soon he was so close he could make out the details of the machine as it hovered across the ground on two large Kevlar tracks.

"St-op," he shouted, straining his throat painfully. "STOP."

With one final bout of energy he lunged forward, throwing himself across the snowy ground right in the middle of the person's path. He landed with a hard 'oomph' and rolled a couple of times until he stopped himself with his elbows dug down into the sludge. Snow splattered into his face and he couldn't see what was happening as the sound of roaring and screeching machinery filled his ears, a cold spray falling over his back. He knuckled it out of his eyes while getting to his knees.

"What'n Spira's cycle! Yu Yevon, what in'e name of the auld kingdom are ya at there?" A voice. Another person's voice. It wasn't Sephiroth. It was another person. He had found someone.

Cloud turned to look at the source of all his hope and as his eyes cleared he could see that they, wearing a green and tan snow suit, were looking down at him through tinted goggles . The person, who was clearly a man judging by his voice and clothing, pulled the goggles up on his forehead as he took a few steps towards him.

"Well, what do ya think ye'r at? I could'a ran ya over."

Cloud wasn't listening to him properly; he just looked up with wide eyes while his mouth moved soundlessly. Another person. He had really found someone.

"I…"

"Gerrup off tha snow. Ya'll catch Shin's sickness."

He gasped when his right elbow was caught and he was pulled up to his feet roughly. He wobbled a bit as he pushed himself away from the man, and took moment to balance himself.

"I…I…"

"Ye'r only a lad. Wha's a boy like yerself doing out here?" The teen looked up into the man's eyes, they were pale brown. Not green. He took a calming breath and finally found his voice.

"I need… I need to get somewhere…" his voice was low and hoarse and he had to stop to clear it again.

"Ya... go somewhere?" The words were repeated as an exasperated shriek. He could only nod and say so again.

"Where about d'ya need ta get? Ya on a vacation or wha?" The man was old, possibly in his fifties or sixties from the way he spoke and the wrinkles around his eyes and forehead.

"I'm lost…" Cloud said, his head finally starting to clear, "I need to get to a police station. Or an airport. Something."

"Lost?" A sceptical look. Cloud nodded, wrapping his arms loosely around his waist.

"Is yer family around? Friends?" The boy shook his head. "Then how'd ya get ta be here?"

"I need…I need to get to someone who can help me. Please…" his tone was ragged and desperate and the man must have sensed his desperation because he calmed down enough to consider what he was saying.

"Help ya…" he hummed, looking to the sky. "we aint got no proper police stations round 'ere… theres is the watch troop… they're the authority I suppose." He looked over to the side for a second, showing him his hooded profile and then nodded. "They'll help ya."

"O..kay. Okay." Cloud closed his stinging eyes and swallowed with some difficulty.

"How'd ya get out here boy? Was ther an accident?… not safe in the deep part a the woods."

"I need to get to the watch," Cloud looked around himself and then back at the man. He felt a knot of worry form in his stomach as he tried to read the other's character through his body language. Could he be trusted? Why was he out here all alone, just riding through the forest? What had he been up to?

"Aright," the man was oblivious to his worry as he nodded, pushing his gloved hands into his pocket. "Grand. I'll bring ya then."

Cloud watched the man turn towards his vehicle and wondered what he was going to do himself. He could walk, maybe, if it wasn't far. It was safer to rely on himself than on someone else now. He just needed directions.

"Y- is it far?"

The old man turned back around and made a clicking sound as he placed a hand on his hip, making the cushions of his coverings sink in.

"I's a good few miles that way… far enough…not too bad I suppose," he pointed a thickly gloved finger in the direction behind him, where mountain tips could be seen needling above the green. Cloud's face fell as he took in the information. He couldn't walk that far. Not now.

"Oh," he said, looking down at his feet. "I… uh…"

"Ya don't need ta explain an'tin ta me boy. I'll just bring ya where ya need. Ya look like ya could use the help," the old man walked up to him, close enough that he could clearly make out his eyes, but still far enough not to invade his space. Cloud took the time to notice how small this person looked. He was tiny. Barely taller than him. It was weird to see someone who wasn't… Sephiroth.

"A..alright. Thank you," he said at last. He had no choice; his whole body was telling him that he couldn't afford to not take this man's help. He would just have to be on guard for anything he might try.

"Okay then," the other man cleared his throat. "Name's Baaja by the way." With that he sniffed loudly and turned away, walking back to his vehicle on heavy boots. Cloud swallowed the nervousness he felt and followed behind.

The vehicle, on close inspection, was built much like an ordinary motorbike. The only difference was the size, the snow bike being larger in width and shorter in height, and the substitution of smooth rubbery tracks for wheels. The seat was the same as any motorcycle and so once Baaja got on all Cloud would have to do was jump on the back.

"C'mon. Up ya get," Baaja said cheerfully, though his gruff indignity at being taken by surprise by this whole incident still lingered in his tone. Cloud bit his bottom lip beneath the collar of the coat, but after a quick glance around himself and another at the man waiting for him, he swallowed his fear and awkwardly climbed onto the back of the seat. The worst part was having to hold on to Baaja, and he hesitated in doing so.

"C'mon. Ya'll fly back tha minute this starts, sitten like that!"

Feeling like he had been scolded, he quickly did as told, leaning in and holding on to the sides of the man's coat.

"Sorry," he said as the engine rumbled to life. The man didn't answer him, probably focused on turning the bike around without hitting a tree.

They soon fell into an easy rhythm as the bike gracefully glided over the snow, darting in and out between the trees and bushes and zig zagging any dangerous bumps. The vehicle was much quieter than a motorbike, and the soft hums had the effect of relaxing his system after a few minutes.

He felt a sense of... he didn't know what. Something between satisfaction, peace, disbelief and a anxious need to wake up from this dream and get the disappointment over with. The feeling of being carried through the trees, over the snow that had so long imprisoned him, through the leaves and ferns that seemed to be waving goodbye as he passed. He tilted his head back and looked up at the moving pale sky, and felt like he was ascending higher and higher into its clouds with every second passed. The wind brushed his chin and neck, purifying him of all things passed. It was slipping away, everything was moving behind him.

Sephiroth was left behind him. Left in the dark in a pool of his own blood like any demon ought to be. But the thought brought him no satisfaction now. In fact, it was devastating to perceive. That poor, confused, sick man. He would never be able to escape it as he was. It would never move behind him. He was trapped there. And Cloud was leaving him to it.

He suddenly felt a stinging warmth wash through his sinuses, and in a need to distract himself shook his head and addressed the man again.

"My name's Cloud," he said, leaning in so he could be heard.

"Like in the sky?" He smiled slightly at that.

"Yeah..."

"Strange name."

"Thank you…um, for helping me."

"Ah no bother Cloud. Was just goin out for a drive meself. Didn't expect ta find anyone out here though. Mighty shock." Baaja chuckled and Cloud was again struck with the suspicion that this man was just too nice. Was he planning something? Why was he acting so friendly?

"Yeah," he said with a slightly shaky voice. "I got lost. I was…walking."

"In them woods?" The man let out an incredulous snort and pointed to their surroundings. Cloud nodded meekly and the old man lowered his hand. "Were ya with someone? Or was there an accident?"

"I'm on my own. I'm lost," he said briskly, and the man must have sensed his mood because he dropped the subject and moved on to another.

"Well Cloud, I live in a cabin further up on the mountains. Retired here fifteen years ago."

"Is there…many people here?"

"Ah no. Less than a few. Can't do much here, with the snow an monsters." The man cleared his throat and manoeuvred the vehicle to turn left with a loud skid. Cloud's stomach jumped and he squeezed his fingers a bit.

"Why d'you stay here?" He winced as he heard the words leaving his mouth. That was rude, he shouldn't have said that. It would make Baaja angry and he would shout at him or do something else. Shit, why did he say that?

But the man didn't get mad; he just sighed and shrugged his shoulders.

"Well... lived in a city with the wife most me life an after the auld one passed on came out here. Nice and quiet sure. Good ice fishing, if you're into tha sorta thing."

"Oh."

They were both silent after that, and Cloud spent the time watching the snow covered greenery as the bike drove on at a steady, smooth pace. Everything was like a dream to him. It felt like he was separated from what was happening, like he was watching it all from a distance. From above.

"The road's up ahead. Then it's a few miles ta the station. They'll sorty ya out and have ya home in now time." Baaja said cheerfully after another ten minutes of riding. Cloud nodded, feeling his stomach tighten with anxiousness. A few miles to the station...

"Thank you."

"No bother boy."

To his immense relief the man wasn't lying because they did indeed reach the end of the woods a short while later. The trees were already sparse at that part of the forest but when they crossed the threshold into the open road the boy felt himself lighten a bit. It was so nice not to be flanked by the imposing structures of the plants and have their shadows darken everything. He truly never thought he'd see the other side of them. He looked around himself and saw miles and miles of snowy landscape. He was free? He was free. He was going to be safe.

The snow was much thicker on the ground now because there was no shelter over it, and so the bike jolted and bumped as it pushed the frozen substance aside. They traveled slower from then on, and Cloud was amazed at the lack of civilization around him. There was nothing here. How could Baaja live here?

What kind of man was he?

"Not much of a road ha?" The man chuckled when a particularly large jolt caused both of them to bounce in the seat.

"No,"

"Well don't ya worry. Tis notin unusual for this yoke," the other tapped the handlebar almost affectionately.

Cloud felt guilty for ignoring the man, but he honestly couldn't focus properly on what he was talking about. He was eager and anxious to reach their destination in time and worried about what would happen after that. He would have to tell someone there what had happened to him. How would he go about it? Would they even believe him? It would be so hard to explain, and humiliating. Perhaps they already knew the story of his disappearance though; it had been on the news for months after all. So maybe they would be understanding and wouldn't ask too much of him. Maybe they'd recognize him right away. He hadn't done anything wrong. All he had to do was tell them what happened and they would help him. They would get him home. He would be safe.

"Wha's that?"

He looked up idly at the man's question, not really interested in what he was saying, which he knew was rude. Baaja had hunched forward on the seat and seemed to be staring ahead at whatever had caught his attention. He followed the gaze but his unprotected eyes, in the absence of eye gear, were blinded by the brightness for a long adjustment period.

"What?" He asked, squinting. But before the other had a chance to answer he felt a the whole word shake around him, and his body turn stiff.

Oh no.

"St…" his eyes slammed wide in an instant as cold terror overtook him in a devastating blow.

He somehow got his hand to move, tapping at the man's shoulder urgently. "Stop. Stop!"

"Wha…wha's wrong with ya?" Baaja demanded in alarm as he instantly slowed the bike down to an easier hum. Cloud didn't answer him, didn't acknowledge his question at all. His horror-filled eyes were stuck starting out across the distance, where the black figure stood among the white valley like a terrible chess piece.

"We have to…" his chest was tight as he tried to get the man to do as he asked, "we have to turn around…we have to turn."

"Why? Wha is it…?" Baaja turned is head around to look at him from the corner of his eye. Cloud pulled his attention away from the distance and looked at him.

"Please. Trust me. Please turn around," he whispered, his eyes watering as he tried to control his fear.

"Is it that thing there? Wha is it?"

"It's... He's dangerous. Please. We have to go back. Hurry!" He slapped the man's shoulder again and then tightened his grip on the coat. Baaja gave a few grumbled curses but then finally complied with what he asked, turning the bike easily in the open space.

Cloud swallowed as he looked back to see the thing still standing there in the distance, watching them.

He had woken up.

"Hurry."

"What in Spira's bloody hell is this all bout? Wha've ya got me inta boy?" Baaja's tone had lost its friendly cheerfulness now as he shouted the words in hoarse, gravely confusion. Probably fear too. He was right to be afraid.

"We have to get away," was all Cloud could say back. He turned to look behind again and too his accumulating horror, nothing was there now.

He had moved. Gaia, where had he gone? He looked left and right and all around him but he couldn't see him anywhere. Where could he have gone? There was nothing to hide behind.. "He's not there."

"Who?" Baaja shouted in exasperation. "Was it a man? Is he after ya?"

"Yes. He's, he's dangerous. We have to get away!" He answered, still looking around the area hectically. He could see that they were almost at the woods again. The entrance waiting in front of them like yawning jaws.

"Are ya in some sorta trouble boy," the man in front of him asked lowly. "I don't want ta get involved in that shit,"The blond just shook his head and sighed.

"I'm not… he''s bad. He's really bad," he knew his words were gibberish but didn't have the will to care at that moment. "He's bad. He can't catch us or.. Or..." Oh Gaia, what would he do?

How had this happened? He was so close.

"Or wha?"

"I don't know. Gaia, I don't know," he cleared his throat and then shook his head. "He-"

"Fuuuuuuuuuuck."

They were both jerked forward against each-other with sickening thumps of muscle and bone when the brakes of the bike were slammed so hard that the back reared straight up from the ground, almost flipping the whole thing over itself. Cloud's stomach flipped as he was pushed into the air and then quickly pulled back down as the vehicle landed back on the ground with a hard bang that left him feeling dazed and winded. He looked forward and saw the source of his driver's thoughtless actions.

Sephiroth.

Standing there. Not ten yards away. There he was in all of his terrible glory; his chest bared, his skin and hair covered in his own blood, the terrible masamune streaming in cruel silver from his grip. He didn't move or say anything; he just stood there looking over to them, the epitome of fear.

A great black wing jutted out behind him at the left side, its sharp feathers reaching high enough to brush out against the branches reaching in over them. The sight of it made Cloud shiver, the cruel elegance of the raven feathers fluttering viciously in the calm breeze.

He'd known it all along. This monster...

"Spira…is tha?" Baaja whispered, not finishing his sentence. The man was breathing heavily now, probably from the dramatic stop he had just pulled with his bike.

"Oh no," Cloud whispered, not able to take his eyes off the great beast of a man in front of him. "Oh Gaia. No, no, no. We have to go…"

"By Spira, that's General Sephiroth! What in Shin's hell is going on here?" The old man turned to look at him, his whole face was hidden by the goggles and coat, but Cloud could feel easily the look of accusation there.

"We have to get away. He'll kill us," he shook his head. "C'mon. just… turn around."

"Don't."

They both looked at the man ahead of them. Sephiroth shifted the sword in front of him and shook his head.

"There is no point," he held his left arm in the air, holding it parallel to the demonic extension from his back. "You cannot outrun this."

"No," Cloud whispered, clenching his fists in front of him. "No." It couldn't be. He was so close. There had to be a way… Oh Gaia. Was it going to end like this?

"Look," Baaja's voice broke through his thoughts and he looked at the old man to see that he had stretched his arms out in front of him in a referee's gesture. He turned his head towards Cloud for a second before looking back at Sephiroth. "I don't know what in Spira's name this is about," he said, "but I have great respect for you, General, and I think we can all sort this out in a logical manner."

"I agree."

Cloud saw his kidnapper smile at the old man and he knew that there was nothing happy about it. He knew that smile, though he wished he didn't.

"Baaja," he whispered, leaning in close to the man's ear while keeping his eyes on the threat standing ominously ahead. Sephiroth's smile fell from his face as he watched him. "Don't trust him," he warned lowly. "We have to go."

"There is nowhere to go. Cloud." He cringed at the tone of his tormentor's voice. It was so certain. Sephiroth had full confidence in what he said.

And why wouldn't he? He was completely right after all. They couldn't get away. It was ridiculous to ever think they could. Cloud may as well have been in that room, in that house with its walls and locks for all the difference it would make now. It was all the same. Sephiroth had the power. He was always in control.

Felling all of a sudden completely drained, he just sighed, sat back and let his hands fall to his sides like wilted petals.

"Look. The boy here's afraid of something." Baaja was saying in the meantime, and Cloud felt a lump form in his throat as he listened to him. He was trying to help. "Now. What's this all about exactly?"

His stomach sank as he watched his tormentor turn to regard the old man; his lips twitching into that almost smile. This wasn't good. Not only was Sephiroth going to punish or kill him, but there was also no way that Baaja would be left unharmed. Sephiroth wouldn't leave him go after what he had seen, he would kill him. He didn't think twice about committing murder before, and he wouldn't now.

"Stop Baaja," he said, tapping the man on his shoulder once more. Baaja looked back at him but he just shook his head back before moving to push himself up from the seat. He had to help the man. He was good, and it was Cloud's fault he was in this situation. He was doomed, there was no doubt about that, but he had to try to save this man.

Once he was on the ground he took a moment to steady himself, then stood up straight and turned to fully face Sephiroth.

Sephiroth's face was devoid of any ounce of emotion, and it didn't change as he rose a hand to beckon the teen forward with a stained finger.

Cloud thought he was going to be sick, his fear almost a palpable thing as he wrapped his arms around his middle and prepared to do as told. He was trying to be brave, but it was hard because he felt so afraid. What should he do? Go over and save himself further pain? Run the other way, just for the sake of it? No, he couldn't just leave Baaja here. The old man was going to help him. He was a good person. Now he was going to suffer, all for some idiot kid he didn't even know.

Tears began to pool in the boy's eyes as he looked between the two men, trying to decide what to do. He didn't mean for this to happen. He'd just wanted to go home.

"Cloud."

He jumped at the loud command, and his fear grew when he saw the intense look of anger on Sephiroth's face.

"Hey, wha's this all about? The boy's scared to death," Baaja spoke again, his old voice jarring on Cloud's senses. He turned when the man put a hand on his shoulder, looking down at the limb in wonder. "Ya alright boy?"

He didn't have time to answer because a moment later his name was shouted so loudly and with such anger that he jumped and stumbled several steps away from the bike.

Sephiroth was tilted forward now, his face partly obscured by the scarlet hair falling over it. His mouth was open and formed into a sneer of what could only be called the true visage of disgust. Cloud was sure he was going to be sick now.

"Come. Here. Now." Sephiroth emphasised each word by stabbing his blade into the snow. Cloud swallowed and then closed his eyes tightly as he took the first step. Gaia, he was so afraid.

He continued walking and when he felt he was close enough, stopped to open his sore eyes. His captor was standing straight again and only his eyes were tilted downwards as they looked over him. The look of derision on his face was clear, and he felt like an insect under the intense scrutiny. He clasped his hands together in front of himself and kept eye contact with the man, trying to contain his tears.

Sephiroth kept him in horrible anticipation for several long minutes, and his breathing began to get heavy under the strain. Finally the man moved, the unexpectedness of it making the boy start and stumble back a step. The tall man bent forward and reached out his hand. Cloud stilled as his face was touched, the fingers first trailing along the edge of his hood before dipping under and pressing against his bruised cheek. His face was so numb he barely felt it, but he still cringed.

"Little liar," Sephiroth mumbled, his fingers digging into the edge of Cloud's mouth. "Are you sorry?" He questioned, just as low. Cloud stared at him for a moment and then moved his eyes to the side. Was he sorry? Yes, but not for the reasons this man wanted. He was sorry everything turned out this way. That he wouldn't be free. That he had been caught and that another man's life was in danger. He was sorry for this man himself, this creature in front of him, and whatever had made him this way. These were the true sources of his regret, but he'd never be able to say so.

"Yes," he finally whispered, his eyes lowered to the ground. "I'm sorry."

"Yes?" Sephiroth hissed. "And are you ready to come home?" Cloud felt a lump form in his throat.

"Yes."

"Hm," the man pulled his hand away from his face. Cloud looked up to see what he was going to do but he barely registered the fist before it collided with his face. A flash of white assaulted his vision and a cold rush of vertigo passed through his body. As he stumbled backwards he heard a loud shout behind him, but couldn't make out the words.

He pressed his hand up to his face and it came back with blood. His nose was bleeding, and the whole left side of his face was burning. He pressed his sleeve against his nose and tried to catch his breath.

"What in holy are ya doing! What's going on here? He's only a lad."

Baaja was shouting at Sephiroth? Oh no.

"Stop…" he tried to get the old man to quiet down but before he could turn to him he gasped as the back of his coat was grasped and pulled backwards. He grunted when he was forced against his tormenter's chest.

"He's been very bold," Sephiroth said, and his hand came up to grip Cloud's chin and tip his head backwards. Cloud shut his eyes tightly, his sleeve still pressed to his nose.

"Wha's he done?" Baaja asked from where he was standing.

"That's none of your concern," there was ice in Sephiroth's voice and Cloud moaned when his head was pushed back further. "And now he's gotten you involved." Sephiroth tisked mockingly, tapping his fingers against his captives cheek.

"I was just giving him a lift. Thought he was in an accident or somt'in," the old man explained, and Cloud tried to get his head free so he could tell the man to stop talking. Sephiroth easily held him while he answered.

"An accident…tut tut. He's a liar you see. You just cannot trust him," after saying this he lowered his mouth to Cloud's hood covered ear and whispered. "Shall I kill him now?"

"No," Cloud whispered back, lowering his hand from his nose. "No. He's innocent. He doesn't know anything."

"He's seen too much," Sephiroth murmured, again in a condescending tone. Light. This was nothing to him but a game.

"Please. Please don't. I'm sorry I ran away. I won't do it again. Please don't hurt him," the boy knew he was rambling, but he didn't care. He wanted the man to listen to him.

"You promise?" Sephiroth leaned forward so his breath was against his throbbing cheekbone.

"Yes."

"Hmm," the mouth pulled back from him, "unfortunately Cloud, that really isn't worth much at the moment."

And with that the teen was pushed forward so hard that he ended up sprawled across the snow and unable to move for several seconds in the aftermath of the shock.

When he was finally able to push himself up with his elbows braced in the snow he saw that Sephiroth was already making his way over to the old man, who was backing away past his bike.

"Run," Cloud shouted. He struggled and squirmed as he tried to get onto his knees but he wasn't able to. His body wasn't listening to his brain. He couldn't move it properly. "Run, Baaja. Get away!" The old man looked at him and then tried to do as he asked but it was too late because Sephiroth had caught up to him all too quickly, and was holding the long masamune so the tip pressed against his neck. Cloud gasped in horror and began trying to drag his body through the snow.

"No," he called out. "Sephiroth. Please. Please don't hurt him! I'm the one who disobeyed. I'm sorry. Please don't do anything." He knew he was rambling but he didn't care. He just wanted Sephiroth to listen to him.

"You hear that?" His kidnapper asked languidly, smiling sardonically at Baaja. Cloud saw the old man try to shift back but Sephiroth just followed him with the blade.

"I d-d-didn't do ant'in w-w-wrong." The old man's voice was shaking so much his words were almost illegible. Cloud felt his heart break.

"No, you didn't," Sephiroth agreed heartlessly, his eyes full of a sadistic kind of amusement that turned Cloud's stomach. "This is all Cloud's fault. For his selfishness you must suffer."

"I'm sorry," he said again, pulling himself along the cold ground as he tried to reach the two men. "I'm s-so sorry. Just don't hurt him. Please don't."

"Ha," Sephiroth turned to face the struggling boy and arched a brow. "You truly care about this thing." The last word was spat along with a nod of his head towards Baaja.

"Yes. Yes," he said breathlessly, catching Sephiroth's eye and trying to convey his plea. His nose was still bleeding, the blood running down the collar of his coat and some drops falling onto the snow.

"You don't want me to kill him. You'd give yourself first?" Cloud knew the man was mocking him, but he nodded all the same.

"I did it. He didn't do anything. I-I didn't tell him… anything. Please." He finally got himself up on his knees and sat back on his heels as he waited for the reply.

"Hm," Sephiroth nodded, looking over at the old man again. He clicked his tongue. "You hear that?"

"Wha?"

"He'd do anything for you to live," Cloud didn't like the tone of Sephiroth's voice. He was acting calm and nonchalant when really he was furious. He was dangerous when he was like this.

"Please…"

"A stranger," he turned back to the teen with wide eyes and held out his hand to him. "You'd do that for a stranger, but you would let me die without a second thought." There it was, the anger.

"N-"

"Oh don't lie, Cloud," the demon spat, "you plead for this insect's life when only this morning you left me to bleed out onto the bed. Me. The one who's done everything for you."

Cloud broke and began to sob.

"Well?" His tormenter continued on, shouting now. "Didn't you? Leave me to die like a wounded dog? Were you laughing at me? At my weakness?"

"N-n-no," the boy sniffed and tried to control his sobs. "I d-didn't think you were dy-ing." He truly didn't. He hadn't even considered that.

"Oh," the man put a fake smile on his face and took a few steps towards him "And that makes it okay then? To leave me that way?"

He just continued to sob.

"WELL?" He squeezed his eyes shut when Sephiroth bellowed loud enough to cause an echo to pound throughout their surroundings, shift some snow from bent branch tips.

"I-No..."

"No," his kidnapper's voice went low and he walked across the snow until he was standing directly above the kneeling teen. Cloud wiped at his face, his glove coming back stained with blood and tears. "Where were you trying to go then?"

"I' not a part a this."

Sephiroth just shifted the sword in the direction of Baaja again and gave him a intimidating look. The man didn't say anything more and he turned back to the wreck of a boy on the ground.

"Where were you going?"

"Home," the word was barely whispered.

"Pardon?"

"Home," he said louder, slowly looking up.

"Hm," Sephiroth nodded, clicking his tongue. "Home. Yes. You were going to leave and not come back. Leave me there to die."

"I didn't think y-"

"All the same," Sephiroth interrupted him. "You left me there. Wounded. After everything I've done. Everything." The last word was spoken quietly, as though for the speaker's own benefit rather than the listener. Cloud closed his eyes.

Sephiroth was right. He had left him there, so wounded. He could have died but Cloud hadn't cared, he only saw an opportunity to leave. That's what Sephiroth had done to him. He had made him into someone who would use others' suffering for their own benefit. He hated him for that.

"I've taken care of you. Given you a home. Food. Clothes. Anything you could want. And you, you spiteful little whelp. The second something happens to me you still think about yourself," Sephiroth's own words were incensing him, and Cloud was nervous of what he would do.

"I-I was afraid…" He said, trying to think of something that would provoke pity. Understanding.

"Lies."

"No… There was something. You weren't acting normal. I-I was a-fraid," he insisted. He cried out when the man leaned down and picked him up by the collar of his coat. Sephiroth pulled him up until his feet were off the ground. The coat was digging under his arm and he tried to squirm his way out of the grip.

"Afraid?" Sephiroth asked, his face inches from the teen's. Tears streamed out of the boy's eyes and he nodded meekly. Sephiroth smirked a bit.

"You will be."

The next thing he knew he was back on the ground and again disoriented. He heard someone screaming a bit away and quickly turned to see Sephiroth holding a struggling Baaja by his shoulder.

"Lemmme go! Ger off me," the old man shouted, squirming and struggling heavily. Cloud watched in despair as Sephiroth easily dragged him back to where the bike was and then threw him hard onto the snow. He started pulling himself forward until he was near the man.

"I'm so sorry," he said, grasping at the snow

"Wha does he want?" The man asked in shaking exasperation. Before Cloud could answer though the man interrupted him by letting out a chocking gust of air, the cause being the violent kick in the side he'd received by their joint terroriser.

"Do not speak to him."

That was directed to Cloud, who swallowed heavily.

"Just l-leave him alone. He won't say anything," he begged, looking at the old man struggling to get up on his elbows. They were like two worms and Sephiroth a great bird choosing which to eat first. His feathers were black, they fell occasionally down on the snow. So dark in comparison it was unbelievable.

Without a word, Sephiroth walked over to him and began pulling him to his feet with a hand under his arm. Once standing the boy was dragged over to the bike and made to sit on it.

"Get on properly," the man ordered briskly.

"What are you doing?"

"I said get on."

Stricken, he clumsily did as told and when he had his legs on either side of the seat he looked after the man with terrified curiosity. Sephiroth walked back to Baaja and Cloud winced as he watched him lift up a leg and slam it down on the man's chest again, hard.

"Don't," he shouted, and was deeply ashamed of the fact that he was too scared to get off the bike to help the man. He was afraid to make Sephiroth angrier, spurring him into further violence.

But Sephiroth didn't do anything else to the grunting man at his feet, just left him lying there on the ground as he turned and walked back to the bike. He stopped for a second, and Cloud looked up, waiting for him to say or do whatever awful thing he was planning. But the man didn't say anything, just stood there as still as the mountain above them, as the great extension behind him began to quiver and extend to the very tip of its breadth. Then, with a ripple through the dark plum, it started to fold into itself, clinking all the way down until it disappeared behind that great broad shoulder. Sephiroth's face did blanch, going stony with discomfort, for a telling few seconds until he'd composed himself again, a man once more.

Then he walked over to the bike and told him to move forward so he could climb on behind, his arm's coming forward to flank the teen as one grasped the handlebar and the other held the masamune to the side. Confused, the boy looked back over at Baaja to see that he was still lying on his back where he'd been left. He wasn't dead though. Or seriously injured. Was Sephiroth…

The engine clinked and thrummed to life and Cloud remained perfectly still as Sephiroth got the vehicle geared and moving. He looked around himself, doing a fairly good impression of a nervous chocobo as his captor drove the bike around in a loop and then set for the direction Cloud thought led back to the house. He watched Baaja ahead of them as he struggled to lift himself, and his eyes widened in horror when he realized what his captor was doing.

"Don't! You're going to run him over," he cried quickly, jerking forward in his seat. He heard the man behind him chuckle and started twisting himself, "no don't. Please. Just leave him alone. Please don't!"

And for one stupid, naive and blissful second he had actually though the man had listened to him. Thought he had appealed to that tiny bit of compassion that must have existed somewhere within the corruption. The bike swerved to the side, just as they were upon the man, clearing him from the way. He thought that's what they were doing...

But no.

"Noooooooooooooooo!"

It probably would have been more merciful to just run the man over after all. Anything would have been more kind than what Sephiroth did. Cloud didn't even see it happen properly. All he knew was that just as they reached Baaja, Sephiroth held his sword out to the air and the next thing the man was skewered right through the shoulder and screaming as he was dragged along beside the bike.

Cloud stared, mouth agape and bile rising in his stomach at the scene. The man's moans and screams were like nothing he had ever heard, loud and painful and wet with blood and water. Choking on air and pain as he was assaulted by both.

"Wha-" the air rushed against his face as Sephiroth, to his horror, made the bike go faster, accelerating the horror.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh," Baaja screamed as his feet fell out from under him completly. He was trying to do something with his arms; they kept lifting a bit and dropping back down. He was like a poor old fish caught on a dangling hook, struggling for breath and squirming.

"STOP!" Cloud screamed in horror. "STOP. STOP. What are you doing?" He turned to look back at Sephiroth. The man's face was devoid of emotion; his eyes wouldn't fall to meet his.

Without thinking he lunged forward and tried to jump from the bike but Sephiroth easily stopped him by leaning forward and trapping him down against the handlebar. So he reached forward and grabbed at the driving hand, the sounds of screaming and wailing grating against his nerves and making him frantic as he scratched and clawed at the skin , actually making it bleed and tear in several places. Still Sephiroth wouldn't move.

"Stop!" He shouted, still clawing and pulling. "Stop. You're going to kill him. You can't do this. Stop. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop! Hesgoingtodieifyoudontstop," he was ranting, pushing his head back, kicking his legs, swinging his arms and doing anything he could to get Sephiroth to stop. The bike turned, causing Baaja to let out a long moan that effected Cloud like a knife in his stomach. They were driving uphill now, which caused the man to slip down further on the blade. Cloud saw him slipping, and the blood on the tip of the blade behind him. It made acid rise up his throat.

"Sephiroth please. Please. He doesn't deserve this. He didn't do anything. Please. Gaia, please stop..."

"Oooahhhhh Uggggggggh" Baaja let out a load moan as his body collided with a tree. Cloud screamed and turned back towards Sephiroth.

"Please stop. I cant… Stop hurting him. Please. Please," Sephiroth wouldn't look at him, and he didn't wince like Cloud did when again the poor old man let out a scream as his body was slammed again and again as they drew deeper into the woods. The free space was getting smaller and it was dark and shadowed now. He didn't know whether this was the way home or not, but he did know that Baaja wouldn't be able to stand much more abuse before the blade tore through his arm.

He looked at the old man, feeling sick at the sight of his agony, and reached a hand out to him.

"I'm sorry," he rasped, blood and saliva dripping down his chin. "I'm so sorry."

"Aaugh, argh, hnnnnn," was all he got in reply. He began to cry again, unable to deal with this situation. It was terrible, but a part of him just wanted to close his eyes and shut it all away until it was over. He couldn't see this; he wasn't supposed to see this.

The bike came to a halt slowly and soundlessly but for the low hum of the halting engine. Once they were stopped, Sephiroth released his grip on the masamune and it along with Baaja fell quickly to the powdery ground.

Sephiroth sat back and Cloud wasted no time in jumping out of his seat and running over to the old man. The sight of the blade running through his padded shoulder made him feel sick, especially when he saw the amount of blood soaking the green coat. His shoulder was ruined, and it was probably a small mercy that the man was near unconsciousness he kneeled beside him and awkwardly placed his hands under his head so he could lift him up a bit.

"Aaugh, Uhnnn,"

"Sorry. Sorry I didn't mean to," he whispered, still crying softly. "Baaja." The man didn't say anything back so he pulled the goggles back from his eyes to see how badly gone he was. He wished he hadn't a moment later though, because the look of pain and fear in those old orbs would stay with him for the rest of his life.

He swallowed thickly and turned to look at Sephiroth as he approached them, unconsciously pulling the old man closer to himself.

"No," he shouted as he watched the man bend down and pick up the end of the large sword. Sephiroth didn't look at him as he pulled the blade out of the man's shoulder with no thought towards gentleness.

"Ack," Baaja's body arched in the air as a series of high pitched gurgles wracked through it.

"I-it's okay," he whispered pathetically once the man was still again, wrapping his hands tighter around his neck. He looked up at Sephiroth.

"Leave him alone now," he begged, trying to be calm and firm. "This is enough. We c-can just leave him here now. He- he won't tell." Sephiroth arched a brow and pointed down at the man.

"You think it would be merciful, to leave him here like this?" His tone was condescending as was the look of amusement on his face," Cloud felt all the more hopeless at the nonchalant attitude.

"You don't know what that means," he sighed, feeling so tired from the thought. He looked up again, "I just… don't want you to hurt him more. T-that was horrible. It was enough. Please." He was begging, as he so often did with Sephiroth, but he didn't care. His dignity had flown away long before this.

"This is your fault," Sephiroth countered, leaning his arm high on the tree beside him and drumming his fingers against the bark.

"I know," he nodded, "It is. And I'm sorry and I'll take the punishment. B-but please don't hurt him anymore. He d-didn't know. He's innocent," he watched as Sephiroth sighed softly, looking down at the man who was grunting and whimpering hoarsely on Cloud's lap, almost fully unconscious now. His eyes changed for a second, as though a thought struck him, before it went away and he looked at Cloud while pushing himself away from the tree.

"It's too late," The words made the boy's stomach drop and he shook his head as his captor approached him, dragging the sword along behind. Splitting the earth

"No," he said shaking his head and holding on tight to the man. "I won't let you. Leave him ALONE," he screamed when Sephiroth walked over to him, shifting himself while still holding Baaja hard to him.

"Hm," Sephiroth cocked a shoulder broadly above him. "What could you possible do to stop me?"

"Ngh, NO!"

He was caught beneath his two arms and pulled to his feet after that. He resisted as much as he could, squirming frantically and twisting around while still holding onto Baaja for all he was worth.

"Stop," he grunted, pushing his body forward. "I'll do whatever you want if you leave him. I-I'll be good. I won't try to leave ever again. Please don't."

It was no good, Sephiroth was just too strong and he eventually managed to pull the teen away from the other man and lift him from the ground with two arms around his waist. Cloud continued to kick and hit and shout but it didn't matter because he was easily controlled and pulled several yards away from the one he was fighting to protect.

"No!" He screamed, scratching and clawing at Sephiroth's bare arms. How was he so strong? Even injured and half naked in the snow. It wasn't fair. He was just too fucking strong!

"Hush now," Sephiroth pulled him tighter against himself as he walked another few steps. When they reached a large tree he stopped and turned the boy towards him. Cloud instantly began pushing at his chest but Sephiroth fended him off and pushed him hard against the cold bark.

"This is your fault," he repeated, and then drove his fist hard into his midsection.

Stolen from him, his breath rushed out in a loud gasp and as he slid like water down to the ground, holding his stomach and trying to catch his breath in pained gulps. His sinuses burned through his face, and all around the skin tingled and cackled.

Through streams of waving colours he watched Sephiroth walk quickly back to where Baaja was still lying.

"N-" he tried to shout, and then to move, but he couldn't. He fell forward and stretched his hands out in front of him as the edges of his vision became blurry and black.

"Pleeeese. Ngggh." He heard Baaja shouting in the distance and tried to call to him.

"St-op, st- op... pl..."

But it had all been for nothing. He watched Sephiroth raise the blade above his head and, after a tense moment of awful anticipation, it came down.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

The scream tore out of him, he couldn't stop it. The image of the blade falling down. Down, down, down into the defenceless chest. It didn't look real. It looked like something from a feverish nightmare. It couldn't be real. But it was real, and it was real when Sephiroth pulled the blade out with a sickening slice, raised it again, and then let it drop back down.

"No. No nooooo," he clawed at the snow, but it was just dust under his fingers.

"Ngghg. Urrgh Nuuuuuuuuh,"

The wails that would haunt him for the rest of his life, which really didn't seem like it would be very long, soon died away to a deathly still silence that made the forest awaken in tones of swaying foliage and cracking twigs far in the distance.

Cloud didn't know much after that, only red stained silver slicing back, a flurry of black feathers falling down over him like a flock of dying angels, and then all of it being pulled out from under him. The snow, the bodies, the tip of the pointed trees with their white caps, him ascending above it, caught in the talons of some miserable creature that his heart, despite it all, was breaking for.

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**Uh, that was hard.**

**I actually found this chapter really emotional to write, just some paragraphs really got to me for some reason, I'm not sure if you guys were affected at all but I'd be interested to hear what you think. Maybe it's because we're coming to the end of this fic, and I've never liked the end of stories. I always just want to stay with characters I love forever; I never want them to go. ****L**

**Anyway, I'll start work on the next chapter as soon as I can so see you then.**

**As always, R&R for quicker updating time.**


	31. XXXI

**Hu Hooo, the penultimate chapter! I can't believe I'm here. It's kind of sad but kind of nice as well, this fic has always weighed on my mind and I was always determined to see it to the end, even though it didn't seem like that at times, so I'm happy to be getting there now. And sad :(**

**Feedback from my last chapter was… mixed, but I'd still like to thank everyone who reviewed. As always its great hearing what you think.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own final fantasy or any Square Enix characters.**

**This fan fiction contains dark, upsetting psychological and sexual themes so if you are not comfortable with that kind of thing then please don't read because I don't want to upset anyone.**

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_Healer of worlds_

**It was frozen to futility before it ever had a chance to rise. It was given nothing from the start but a belief that it could ascend to the heights of its giant brothers. Now it will remain frozen, a structure of decay and disappointed ambition.**

_Dreams of the morrow hath the shattered soul_  
_Pride is lost_  
_Wings stripped away, the end is nigh_

He let the page float back to the desk with a feather's brunt, then stood up from the groaning chair, picked his jacket up from its squared shoulders behind and made his way to where he had been summoned.

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The deadened orbs rolled down from his lap one after the other in a courtly display of patience, then bounced away across the tiles in a synchronized series of clinking jingles that had no real rhythm to follow, all the gaps merely being filled between each impact so there was no respite from its continual progression.

He didn't care, the noise was better than the silence had been, and the song, slow and sad and echoing high up through the vacant roof, was preferable to that which had before been playing in his head. Songs of screaming and crying, of innocence mixing with horror. The song of a liar. The song he'd composed.

Sephiroth could feel the water slipping down over his cheek, first curling along the line of the socket before spreading down below in one brook that was salty to finally taste, but he had no wish now to raise his fingers and brush it away, no notion towards disguising the meaning of it.

There was no point. Not anymore, when the truth of his monstrosity was so blatantly laid out for the world to see. He, a corrupt thing, a puppet strung together with workshop pieces, everything about him forged by curious hands that weren't his own, finally able to see the threads holding them together.

And there he'd been. Trying to ignore those strings. Trying to construct a charade that would hide what he'd already known.

Cloud.

He closed his eyes, more sadness pushing out between the lashes.

Cloud. The key to his whole denial. His companion in the strings.

"Liar..."

He slapped his hands up over his face, leaning forward so that only his tailbone remained in contact with the shelve behind him. His dirtied, bloody hair scraped down around his skin like coarse cloth as he pressed his head to his knees within its shade. He hissed, nails digging into his temples as the wound at his side pressed and churned from the unwanted manipulation. Blood gushed out in a steady wave that held the same sensation as vomiting, going as far as to make him retch. Just one purge though, and then it was dormant again.

He wouldn't mind if it wasn't. If the whole of his insides spilled out onto the tiles now around him, converting all the pristine white to sickening red. It would be easier like that, to fall in that way, easier than face this truth he could no longer hide from.

Genesis.

Her.

Cloud.

"Liar..."

Mother.

He sat back, dragging his fingers down over his face and looking up to the ceiling of painted uselessness.

There in that face, the only one that really held any features among the throng of carnal flesh and cherub feathers, he could see her now. The blood on her fingers, the sadness in her face, the pain of protection. That unique type of torment that couldn't be replicated by anything else on the planet.

There was nothing to match a mother's pain.

**Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing Ring, Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing Ring**

He tilted his head, feeling dazed and dizzy but not moved to action as he considered the shrill ringing coming from behind the living room doors across from him. He only thought of the last time he'd heard them, and his mind did a fast, violent scope of all that had occurred within the breadth of that space.

_"You weren't acting normal. I-I was a-fraid..."_

He closed his eyes, only to open them again when the ringing from the other room finally ceased, and in the following silence, where he took the second to notice that the materia had finally stopped rolling on the floor and was now settled quietly against the far corner, a voice came through.

_"Sephiroth. Pick up. Sephiroth. I think Genesis is in Modeoheim."_

He gave a sigh that was more of tiredness that worry, and set about pushing his broken body up from the floor, hoping the threads would hold for another while yet.

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_Zack. Zack it has to be now. It's coming to the end._

By the time he'd opened his eyes to the metal plain of his dorm's ceiling the voice was just a whisper in the back of his mind, something belonging to a fading dream that no longer made sense in waking logic. And yet, there was something about it, or the message it was trying to convey, that stuck with him, drowned out the unified harmony of sixteen sleeping boys' heady breathing, the thrum of air-conditioning behind the walls, footsteps somewhere far far away that even the smallest doses of Mako were able to make him aware of.

He tried to pull it back to the front of his mind so he could examine it again, sort out what it all actually meant, but it just wouldn't work with his eyes open. So he closed himself off from the moon-diluted darkness and tried again, harder. He searched his mind through the memories of dreams he'd suffered through for months now, these illogical little streams of remembrances he could never set into order, no matter how long and hard he'd tried.

But that night something felt different, there was an urgency running through him that he couldn't explain, a sudden need to decode these tinkling messages and find their source. So he concentrated, and in a space of time that was not soon or long, shapes finally began to emerge.

A tickling tingling broke out on the bicep of his right arm, and he lifted his other hand to rub it away, only to find his fingers coming into contact with a line of folded cotton.

"_Ngh-"_

Pink and green overcame him in a disorientating blast and all at once he lost his physical self to it, floating as nothing but a consciousness in its ocean once the aftershock rolled away. Nothing familiar was felt afterwards, heat or cold or pain, just a pulse, vibrating through him in a rhythm that grew and receded with anatomic reliability. It came with every word that was now as solid as if they were being belted out by one of his dozen sergeants. Not at all loud and gruff like that, but real.

_Zack_

No, not at all loud. A voice that very well could have been the whirring of a soft breeze, spreading warmth into the abyss so beautifully that if he still had eyes or a face at all he might have cried for it. Now he could do nothing but listen and feel the pulse.

_We're at the end. You have to go now, or never have the chance again_

_**Go where? Find what?**_ He had no mouth to ask, no voice behind it. He wasn't even hearing the words through ears he realized; they were just a part of him. Whatever _he_ was here.

_I know you have questions but I can't answer them for you. It's not in my power. All I can give you is this, and tell you to hurry!_

_..._

He came back to himself with a gasp that was very much the same as if he'd emerged from drowning at the last possible minute. He could even feel the wetness all over his skin, dripping down his temples to curl over the shells of his ears and making the area beneath his arms hot and uncomfortable.

But the words weren't lost to him this time, and the message was gripped in his mind as firmly as if his own fingers and palm were crushing it there.

He licked his parched lips and went about, as carefully as he could, pushing himself up from his squeaky bunk. They were dour things, these beds, unreliable for keeping secrets in how they groaned and screeched in betrayal when you tried to shift from their control. But he managed the task well enough, and got himself to his feet without a single head in the room casting a sleepy suspicion his way. It had taken some getting used to at the start, this communal sleeping arrangement, and though accustomed to it now he had no fondness for the lack of personal space or privacy.

Then again, he had very little fondness for anything anymore...

Still tense, as if his own bones were made of steel springs and his legs set and hard, he went about in robot movements gathering his clothes and shoes from where they were folded neatly on the chest at the foot of the bed, and with them hanging from and over his arms, made his way between the two straight lines of his sleeping comrades until he'd reached the dormitory door.

Out in the hall there was still need for caution, but not as much so he released a pent up breath and set about pulling his pants and jacket on over his sleeping boxers and T-shirt, then reaching for his stockings, only to realize that he'd somehow missed them. It was a miserable thing to pull his cold boots over the bare skin of his feet.

But he didn't give it much more than a urgent glower as he made quick work of the laces, and then sheathed his training addition sword- which the grunts were always required to have at hand to get them used to the feeling the kind of power weapons brought- before he was on his way.

The halls of Shinra's training grounds were light silver during the day and as grey as wet stone at night. They seemed to go on and on forever without any foreshadowing of an end. The first few weeks after Angeal had brought him here, his mind in a stupor from alcohol and grief, he'd roam them for hours like a condemned ghost, looking for a way out, or a way in, or anything beyond the reality of what they were trying to make him do.

But the months had trained him well- in every way except the one that counted- and he barely had to think about it now before he'd reached the elevators that would lead to the bottom floor, the mess hall, the simulated training arena and the exit of the building.

He made his way all the way down, and from then on it was a game of duplicity and good timing to get out the front door, past the main grounds, and over to the registered living quarters without being caught and marched back to his dorm with the promise of future retaliation.

He wouldn't let that happen. He knew very little of what was going to happen that night, aside from the fact that he wouldn't let anyone stop him from seeing it's end.

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_This call cannot be connected. The person you are trying to contact may h-_

He let the phone drop down onto the seat beside him with a shake of his head and gave his full attention, where it was certainly needed, to the windshield in front of him, which was barely transparent through the bombardment of thick sleet against the glass. Clouds that were as grey as the smoke that wafted from a dying Ifrit hindered his view in patches of violent blindness, pregnant with turbulence that could very easily knock the machinery out of its rhythm with violent tremors.

The hills and trees spread that out ahead of him, when he could make them out, were so close that he found it hard to feel how high he really was from the ground. But he gave this no attention as he gripped the steering bar firmer and cast a quick look down at the sonar screen.

Not far now. He just hoped it would all be for more than a thoughtless game.

Reno was beyond what went beyond being fucking_ pissed._

No, he'd been _pissed_ at the start, when the pounding had woken him up from a sleep that had been three days of shit coming. He'd been _fucking_ pissed when it'd continued to do so no matter how long he'd tried to block it out, rolling into a ball and pulling the covers over his head like he was waiting out a Gaia-damned storm, and he'd been _beyond_ fucking pissed when this didn't happen and he'd had to push his warm fucking covers off himself and get up up from his fancy Shinra mattress to walk through his freezing apartment in the middle of the night. And now, having stepped on the cap of a bottle he'd left flung on the ground, lodging the frilled metal into the underside of his heel so hard he'd had to peel it out like he was opening the tab all over again, he was at the stage where whoever it was at the other side of the door, be it Tseng, or Vled or fucking fat Gaia-damned Shinra himself, he was going to pound them into a pulp, until their face and the bloody ground looked one and the same.

But it wasn't Tseng, or Vled or fat Gaiadamned Shinra himself at the other side of the door when he finally got a chance to pull it open. It was Zack Fair, dressed up like he was going to rob the place and then smoke whatever he'd made from the earnings, staring back at him with an expression that gave pause to what had seconds ago felt like impenetrable fury.

"_Zack_," he found himself hissing, in confusion and agitation and mostly disbelief, "what n'the hell are you doing here man?" Shinra cadets weren't allowed out after some kind of curfew, weren't they?

The boy took in a breath, pulling his hands out of his pocket and inclining his head at him.

"I'm sorry for waking you up," he said with a grim purse of his lips, "and I'm sorry if this gets you into trouble but I need your help."

Reno frowned at him.

"I aint the one whose gonna get inta trouble here," he pointed out slowly, and then meaningfully urged the boy inside. Zack did so, but there was an energy about him that made it seem like he wouldn't be contained for long. He turned to face him as he closed the door, but before he could speak the redhead threw an arm out into the air and hissed again.

"What the fuck d'ya think yer doing here Fair? Has the juice finally messed with yer mind? Ya gone loopy?"

The boy seemed to consider this for an un-reassuring few seconds, and then shook his head in verdict.

"No, look," he sighed, running a hand back through his tousled hair, "I just... I need yer help man."

"Ya said that," the redhead snorted, walking over to the couch where a bundle of clothes were sitting in a heap and starting to wade through them for something. His body, in only a pair of black boxers, was still serpent like-lean but had developed a web of muscle lines that told of a strained, hard few months. He could feel the tension in himself, the pull of muscles newly formed.

He wasn't the only one. Zack's body had changed too, lost its youthful softness to be replaced with the rigidness of adult routine. Shinra was changing them.

"What kind a help is that man? The water in the cafeteria not strong enough. Wanna help yerself to the fridge. I havn't been here fer a while," he took a second to pull a dark navy sweater over his head, and while is arms found the sleeves he went on, "but ya can have a look if ya want. Might be a few cans there."

"No," Zack bit out, not really sounding annoyed, "not that- why are you getting dressed?"

The other gave him a supercilious look,

"Coz I don't wanna have my crack showen when the brigade shows up ta haul yer ass back ta base," he scoffed, working his way into a pair of dark slacks. Zack sighed.

"Well I'm glad you're doing that. Because we need to hurry."

"_We?_"

"Reno," the boy took a step towards him, his eyes wide and very near glossy, his face flattened out in an expression that was somewhere between desperation, hope, fear and... most worrying of all, an unbending determination. He looked to the side, and then lifted a finger to point out the window that looked out three stories above the ground.

"I saw you," he looked back at him, "you flew over the grounds last week. You landed on the roof, the Wutian was with you, but you were doing it on your own, weren't you?"

"S'part of my training," he agreed reluctantly. And he already knew, even before he asked, where this was leading, "what's it got to do with anything?"

Zack looked at him again. Desperation. Determination.

"I need a pair of wings."

What came after being _beyond _what went beyond what went beyond being fucking _pissed_?

**;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;**

The Reactor was absolutely freezing, its metallic infrastructure nothing more than a series of frozen bars and grates around him, like a great but crudely made birdcage that had been long ago abandoned by its fluttering charges and now merely waited in the snow for its own decay.

Angeal blew white breath out between his lips in a huff that fogged through the red, and let the door behind him fall back into its heavy frame with a bang that echoed on for what felt like miles above him. Then he walked forward, his footsteps feeling delicate on the frozen floor that would have been metal tiles if plans had seen fruition. He looked around himself, and though the place was so broken and unhinged from years of abandonment, though the wind outside continued to clatter boorishly against the walls of levels far above him; neither allowing solid evidence of a bodies past or present presence, he knew it immediately.

A man had been here. One very much like himself, if the stench of old Mako cells was anything to go by. He licked his lips and called out.

"Genesis?" His own voice imitated him for at least fifty levels, but when that died away there was nothing else. "Genesis?"

This he did for over ten minutes.

But eventually he just had to close his mouth and shake his head, reminding himself that what he was hoping to find had been a long shot to begin with, and so getting frustrated would be pointless and a waste of energy. But he couldn't help it, and to fight this he walked on through the empty grounds, his eyes circling that great wall of chrome and steel that would have, again if plans had seen an end, been issued with containing the violent pulse. It was as quiet as any lifeless thing now though, its purpose nullified the same as the tissue of a failed organ.

He approached the control station, a thing he'd seen a thousand times in other circumstances, usually lit up and blinking, with trained hands controlling the dozens of screens and levers looping around an invisible seat, the automatic helm of a ship that never set sail.

How appropriate that he'd be the one to stand at its peak, to take its directionless wheel. A failure in every possible way imaginable. A man who'd failed his closest friend, who couldn't bring him back from the darkness no matter the amount of years spent trying, the man who'd lost his nephew to a dark quite thing who went through the motions of a military routine with ethanol eyes and a mouth always paused to stop himself from screaming.

_Healer of worlds..._

He shook his head, bending forward to press it against the cold rubber of one of the charge levers. The material was shockingly cold pressed into his forehead, and he almost welcomed the threat it imposed over everything behind his skull. Let it all freeze... what difference would it make?

The envelope he noticed very quickly upon letting his eyes fall to the ground.

He squinted.

It was an old brown thing with a lip that looked like it had been opened and sealed again over a dozen times. Old but at the same time it looked new... or newly placed. Not in any way affected by the ice and dirt that had managed to take over anything else left at its level.

He bent down to pick it up, finding again that though the paper had hardened and was bitingly cold to touch, it didn't seem in any way like a relic of this site.

Excited and trying to ignore it, he skimmed his thumb under the half-hearted seal of the lip and let it open up, before reaching in and taking out a bundle of old pages kept inside, most held together by an old paperclip at the corner, some loose and slipping from his hold as he took them all out in one haul.

He gathered them all together and started to read over words, handwritten in black ink, the letters getting more crude and blurred together the further he went on.

He felt himself turn cold, as if slowly becoming one of the hundred pillars keeping the roof up over his head. The snow outside, inside him now, frost and ice and sludge. Cracking, and drowning underneath.

"Have you ever heard such lunacy?"

He couldn't find it in himself to speak, only look over at the man who stood, with the door held open by one arm, the wind blowing his silver hair forward around his face like reaching Zoloms. The embodiment of ice and snow and frost himself.

**;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;**

"They'll do it fast. Tseng likes things ta be descreet. They'll get one of the others ta handle it just ta be safe... them fucken guns been nippen at my ass from the start... but then, that twisted little fuck of a president's brat been peering around..."

Zack took his eyes away from where they were scanning the ground that was nauseatingly miles below them, to regard the mumbling ball of nervous rage in the seat beside him. Reno was leaning forward in his seat, his neck strained so far in front of himself that the veins were as taut as mountain strings under the skin, reaching from below his jawbone to dive under the collar of his top, pumping violent blood into every part of him, riling him up further.

"They're not going to execute you Reno," he sighed, wishing the boy would calm down, and in return reassure himself that he was in steady, capable hands as he was lugged for thousands of miles across the land. Reno's eyes slid over to him as quick as the flash of lightning materia, pinning him to his seat with zipping electricity.

"Shut yer fucken mouth Fair. An I'm telling ya right now that there aint no way I'll be the first ta go. This is your shit... Fucken psycho taken me out in the middle of the night to find an address ya dont even know... shit, what the fuck's wrong with me?"

Zack rolled his eyes, looking back out at the windscreen in front of himself, and swallowing a lump in his throat as he considered the white caps of the hills still a good distance away. The current situation was bad enough on his nerves, but take in snow, wind and miles and miles of predator filled forest, then he had to reconsider just what the hell he_ was_ doing here after all.

Was Reno right? Was this really just a crack in his broken mind he'd let open too wide? Had he not considered that everything he was thinking, those words he remembered, were really nothing but figments of his imagination. Something created entirely out of the matter of his own mind.

This address? What the hell did he think it would lead to? Had he just made it up? And why Modeoheim?

A place that could very well mean certain death.

He looked out again, at what was possibly the most brutal environment he could have put himself in, and wondered what exactly it was he was hoping to find here...

...

In forty minutes they had reached the patch of black and grey that was Modeoheim's tempestuous skies, and as he'd suspected nervousness gave way to outright terror as their airborne vehicle was swung and bashed by sweeping gales and showers of slapping snow. Reno cursed and growled his way through it, adjusting panels and hitting screens with an efficiency Zack would have marvelled at if he wasn't frozen to impotency against his own seat, where the leather lining had used his heated sweat to seal itself to the flesh of his back and legs.

Several times he was sure they were going down, that awful feeling of his stomach rising up to his chest marking every drop in height suffered, but they never did fall. Bashed, whipped and shoved from side to side, Shinra manufacturing lived up to its name as their strong little tin can made its way through the clouds of ever pressing grey and into the clearer air just above the points of a thousand coniferous trees.

He breathed a sigh of relief, looking over at Reno who seemed to be taking a minute of his own to come down from the rush.

"That was awesome man. How the hell did you learn to do that in six months?"

The boy snorted, lifting his shoulders for seconds before letting them fall again.

"S'not the worst part of my trainen... not by a long shot..."

Zack frowned curiously at this, and was about to ask what the worst part_ was_ when the boy spoke again.

"Ya have any idea where this damn place is exactly? M' scaling miles here," he complained, shooting him another of his superfluous looks that told him exactly what he thought of his mental state. Zack looked down at his hands now, suddenly nervous as he realized how close he was coming to the moment of truth.

"I looked it up. There's an old Mako reactor up on the mountains. The place is to the south of it, following the line of the wood road."

The redhead took this in.

"I know the location of that Mako reactor. There's a landing strip a couple a miles from it. I'd be happier tryen ta get down there than finding my own patch. It might be a bit off from where ya want though."

"That's fine. I don't mind. Just get to the strip and I'll find my way from there." _Find my way where?_

So they made for the landing zone, spanning miles of forest and hill caps in minutes, until they came upon a clearing which, by the perfect curve of the cleaved trees around it, was clearly man made. Tall red posts marked off the perimeter from the air, and it was these along with the presence of another dark vehicle very similar to their own, that they spotted first.

Reno eased them down into the circle as smoothly as if he'd being doing it for years, though the strange placement of the other helicopter probably made the manoeuvre more difficult than it would have been. But they got down well enough, their tale just clearing the bush of the left side foliage, scraping a small bit against one of the alerting poles.

Zack didn't realize how much tension he was holding in his body, not until the moment he felt the skids press into the ground with a thud that vibrated through the entire cockpit. A breath expelled itself from his lungs in a fierce gust then, and he took the time while the engine was shutting off to close his eyes and let his mind clear of everything except that one thing that was so vital now.

"Shit. That's a Shinra alright!"

He opened them again to regard Reno, who was busy unbuckling himself from his seat chaotically while craning his head forward and studying the helicopter outside. He looked out as well, and sure enough the five dreaded letters were shining back at them, sliding along the line of the boom in an exact imitation of where they were located on their own tail.

"Shit," he agreed.

He proceeded to unbuckle his own harness and soon both boys were exiting the cockpit and crunching their way over the snow to better examine this new menace.

"No one's around," he noted, scoping with his ever enhancing senses for a sign of anyone moving within the vicinity.

"But they might come back," Reno mused grimly, "and when they do we're fucked."

"Not necessarily," he pointed out, looking around himself, "who's to say that we're here doing anything wrong? If it's just some SOLDIERS out on a mission they wouldn't know any better than to think your here on business as well. How would they know?"

"An if it's not just some ordinary soldiers? If it's some higher ups?"

"_Then_ we're fucked," he tutted, placing his hands on his hips and looking over at the other, "but Reno... I have to find this place. I can't go back without seeing what's there. But I don't want to get you in any more trouble, and I do appreciate you getting me here. So you can leave now if you want, I wouldn't blame you."

"An how will you get back once ya realize yer a fucken maniac and this was all in yer head?" The other deadpanned, blowing out silvery air throw his teeth in a sarcastic stream.

Zack thought of her voice, whispering into his consciousness.

_This will be your last chance_

"I can't think about that now."

The redhead huffed and rubbed his palm back and forth across his mouth, turning on his heal to consider the looming bodies of the black trees around them. His skin was as pale in the dark as the snow around their feet, except where it had turned a darker purple around his eyes and nose. He shivered a bit, his flimsy jacket not enough to keep this kind of cold out. Zack felt cold too, but not as much as he should have.

"I'll wait here" was the soon to be Turks verdict, "let's hope yer right an these fuckers are just some overgrown grunts on a mission that don't require no brains, they clearly aint no good at parken," then he looked over at him, the moonlight diluting his irises and making them swirl like stirred liquid in a slitted mug. The effect wasn't all natural. "Just be as quick as ya fucken can Fair. An don't let no goddamned Basilisk snare ya. Ya even got a weapon?"

Zack nodded to this, patting his side where the training sword was hanging. It wasn't the greatest quality, blunt and made from a standard Junon steel manufactured in bulk, but he felt capable enough with it by now to think it offered enough protection from a run of the mill forest monster.

Reno didn't agree.

"Damnit Fair, is that all ya brought?" At his silence the boy growled and flung his head back to look up at the sky, as if seeking divine intervention. When this didn't harvest any results, he stooped back forward and then with another string of curses under his breath, turned on his heal to make his way over to their helicopter again.

Not sure if that was the end of the conversation, Zack stood there with his fingers wiggling at his sides while the boy went about searching for something in the cockpit before turning and heading back to him again.

"Here," he bit out, holding out what looked like a black leather pouch to him. Zack took it unsurely, arching a brow.

"S'materia," the other explained before he could ask. The boy sighed and tucked his hands into his pocket. "Only weak shit, but s'all we have here. Better than fac'n anything with that butter knife ya got."

Zack nodded, and without looking in the pouch to see what he had he fastened it by its pull strings to the loop of his sword belt. Once this was done he looked up at the other again, and shrugged his shoulders.

"Alright well, wish me luck?"

Reno's face flattened out, "how bout I just encourage ya ta get over this mental breakdown before ya run yerself inta some real danger instead," he shook his head, "I'm given ya a time limit Fair, an if I see anythin that even _looks_ like a suit yer on your own here. I mean that."

Zack chuckled, because of how untrue the statement was, and with a last nod to his frowning companion turned to face the trees. They were like SOLDIERS themselves, tall and silent and fierce, and all he could see behind them was a blackness that didn't seem like it had ever been penetrated by light. He felt it come over him like a physical thing as he walked forward, the very same as wading his way into deep cold waters on a day that wasn't that warm in the first place.

The scent of frozen sap and bark burned at the back of his throat like he'd swallowed them down, but he ignored this and all the rest, making himself focus on what was ahead. Even if what was ahead was an impenetrable blackness that he would never make his way out of again.

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"So he thinks he's degrading because of these faulty cells?"

"He _is_ degrading."

Sephiroth offered the man a flat look, shrugging stiffly as he turned part-way on his heel, "whether these supposed cells are to blame... I'm not so sure."

Angeal looked down at the envelope in his hand, the corners bent under his blunt fingers and the paper crumpled in his sweating palms, "this research. It's so detailed. Every part of this supposed experiment is drawn out to the smallest detail. It-"

"is a lie."

A rattling silence loomed between them, the wind whirring against the outside walls so loud it threatened to bring the place down upon them. But it wouldn't, not today.

"And yet there is evidence in the very fact that Genesis _is_ degrading. I don't know of any other cause for what you described," Angeal's voice was heavy with frustration, at him, and the man who wasn't there. Both of his most loved companions failing him.

Sephiroth felt his heart become a dull, black thing in his chest, but he couldn't acknowledge the pain of it. There was too much at risk.

"There are catalysts. Diseases, infections, bacteria contamination. Anything he could have gotten during his years of service," he murmured, folding his arms across his chest. A twinging pain was starting to spread over the right side of his back, as if something were trying to get out through the tissue and bone there. He swallowed and arched his spine.

"Why didn't you tell me he was here?" What started as almost a whisper ended in a coarse hiss of exasperation as the speaker held out his hands and threw him a look a raw disappointment. It made him flinch, and his next words came up with an onslaught of glass particles.

"I didn't... I don't think you should see him like this Angeal. He's not anything of the person we knew. He showed me that," he pointed at the envelope in the others hands, "for no other reason than to try to drive me as mad as himself and gain a partner in his crusade against the company. Against everyone who works for it." He stopped on an outward breath, and watched the other man's reaction to his words.

Angeal's face was nothing but a set jaw and hard lines around the features as he watched him back, the paper making crackling noises within his finger's wrath. When he did speak his voice was low and bordering on hostile.

"But still, _he_ was the one to point me in this direction," he said, "he left this for me to find. Why would he do that to someone he'd made a supposed enemy of?"

"I can't explain his actions," Sephiroth hissed, suddenly feeling beyond tired and exasperated, "I don't want to try. But I'm telling you that the man we knew before is dead. All that's left is a blind lunacy caused by a belief in a pile of cleverly construed lies."

_Lies. Lies. Lies. _The word ricocheted off the walls at every side of them, rising up to the highest point of the reactor's rooftop that they couldn't even see from where they were.

Angeal was quiet until the echo died away, and then said with a grim sort of defeat.

"Do you think there's any hope of helping him? You tell me, being the only other man in the world who ever really knew him. Is there a hope of getting him back? Anything?"

Sephiroth thought of the feathers and flesh turning hard under red snow not so very far from them, and he truly wished he were in their place as he was forced, by his own survival instant, to shake his head and say,

"Not even a shadow of it Angeal. That's what I think," and then, not able to bear the blackness that came over his friend, he went on, "but if you need to you can continue to look for him. He gave no indication of where he was going, but I have a feeling it was towards South-West, towards Canyon."

Angeal seemed to consider this for a long while, weighing out a rabble of arguments in his mind no doubt, but eventually just heaved a sigh that lifted his giant shoulders, and said, "no. I know you, of all people, mean what you say. So if you honestly say there is no hope of his redemption, then I can't give any more of my life trying to find it. I have other obligations to look to. Things that can still be saved."

Sephiroth felt an unbelieving relief wash over him, like he was seeing the end of a fear he didn't even realize he'd been so terrorized by. But there was a bitter tinge to the notion.

_I know you, of all people, mean what you say._

How many levels of inaccuracy could there be to one statement?

He nodded and gave the man a sombre look of approval, "I think you're making the right decision."

Again the wind filled up the space between words, pushing itself harder against their protection now, as if protesting his deceit and fighting to sweep in and blow all his lies away.

**;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;**

He had Mako in his system, but only a few months' worth of doses. It had held up pretty well for the past hour and a half as he'd navigated his way through the opaque forest with nothing but an in-explainable sense of direction and a standard issued training sword leading him on, offering protection from the six monsters that had jumped out at him along the way, but now he could feel himself wearing down, every breath burning his throat and his legs loosing feeling to the knees as he pulled them forward through snow that was as deep in some places as a shallow pool. He'd been stupid, knowing where he was going, not to have sourced a heavier jacket and some other articles to insulate himself with. But... this cold, it wasn't something you could predict, it wasn't something anyone but the person standing in the middle of it could explain; how it froze the fingers, lips and eyelids on the outside, and every organ within.

But the good news was that for the past while he'd been able to see more and more of the sky above him, because the trees were becoming less tightly packed and the ground more spacious and paved.

Paving the way, soon, for the sight ahead. A great stone edifice blackened out with the rest of the night, but visible in its strong lines and shaded corners.

He just hoped, clutching his bleeding arm from where a Bizarre Bug had slashed it earlier, that it wasn't a hallucination brought on by the impending vertigo he'd been experiencing.

It wasn't. Slowly more and more of the structure came into focus through trees and branches that in his dizzy state really looked like they were pulling apart like stage curtains for him. Lines of dark eye-like windows and a grand square head made from thick stone and brick came first, a big front door serving as the nose, but with a frowning arch above it that could have been an inverted lip.

He shook his head, white spots that weren't snowflakes littering his vision, and looked again.

Around the house there were no walls or gates to block his view of it, just a smooth plain of white snow leading right to its front steps, as if the whole land here were just a garden for its design.

By that point it was all he could do to stagger across the distance, his body so sluggish it was unbelievably hard to muster the most minimal extension of muscle.

But a sense of urgency, something roaring just out of volume, pressing need into every part of his self, told him that time was the most important thing in the world now, and he had so very little of it.

**;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;**

It was hard to move any part of himself. His skin felt like its top layer had been pulled away, exposing every nerve underneath to the spiky fibres of the sheets supporting him, the crisp hardness of the material plain.

Just that morning he'd laid exactly where he was now, his mind alight with hope and excitement at an opportunity granted beyond all of his wildest expectations.

But now, a lifetime from that feeling, the death of a poor stranger passed, he was reborn in fire and thunder and cold. And only then, so he could perceive the necessity of his end.

He would have screamed, slipping himself down across the mattress and bending his knees to let his feet touch the ground, if his throat had not been so sealed together with blood and bile, would have cried and called for an end as he'd always done before. But as it were, all that could be heard emitting from inside him where whispered hisses and choking gurgles as the boy slowly, an inch at a time, drew himself down until he landed on the floor with a wracking shock of agony that he was almost sure would end the functioning of his organs.

It didn't, and once stable again, his fingers grasped into the scratching wool, he pulled himself forward until he was shadowing a simple glass knocked from the dresser-top hours earlier. He hugged it loosely with his palm, his sizzling skin sighing down onto the cool iciness of it cylinder.

But he took no time to revel in the relief, possession no ability anymore to want it. Not when his victim lay out there somewhere in the snow, unfeeling of the cold or darkness now in his stolen rest. His victim. The hoard of them he'd accumulated in his selfishness, all piling up like a dynasty of his fallen. There was only one way to end it now. One solution.

The floor seemed do go on for miles and miles of its own little bush-lands, his arms red with impact burn by the time they'd gotten the rest of his unwilling self across it. There then, they slapped down onto the hard white tiles across the threshold of the bathroom door, the glass shattering only into a few parts as the bulk of it rolled away to rest in the shadow of the toilet's rim.

He let his head fall, his neck cramping too badly to ignore anymore, and his forehead cracked sickeningly against the floor. There, in the flash of white that extended itself beyond the dimensions of time, he saw her. Beautiful and sad, weeping for him and urging him back.

_Cloud don't. Just hold on longer._

The white, and her pink dress, were gone with a shake of his head. And newly replenished with determination, he made about getting himself forward again, his fingers seeking out and then closing around one of the shards of glass as he made his way to the edge of the shower wall.

Then it was physically the most difficult thing he had ever done, he truly believed, to pull himself up along the glass of the cubicle until his body was paralleled to his brace.

Blood and spit dribbled down his chin and across his shirt, but no tears of any kind stained his face as he pushed forward so the door fell open, and he could fall in against the inner wall.

Gulping viciously for breath now, with sweat stinging his eyes, his shaking hands reached up and quickly twisted both of those sterling taps around.

All, to the very last decimal, of his energy went into that action. And by the time the pumps behind the walls came to life with a clanging surge of heavy water fall, he had nothing left to stop himself from following the torrent down. He crashed onto the porcelain bottom in a disjointed heap, his shoulder smacking against the wall and his shin jarring against the doorway in the pinnacles of the impact..

He did scream then, sending up a surge of red bile that mixed down into the drain with all the rest.

Even after it was gone more came, red liquid loping around in a whirlpool like strawberry syrup on the ice-cream cones his mother bought him as a child during the summer months. Like the blood of Baaja staining the snow. Like Seifer's, Clarence's, that unnamed boy that was not him. Too many now. It had to stop somewhere.

He looked down at his hand, where the water was stealing the blood from around the glass embedded into his palm, and knew it was only justice that it should spill. It should have long before this.

He'd never leave, and to ever try again would just be more hurt for others around him, and that realization brought a sort of peace with it. It finally allowed him to let go now of things he hadn't been able to before. So free finally, to be entirely rid of that sadistic shackle they had called hope.

There was only one way to end it all, to stop the cycle, and he could do it now. He was ready to let go.

He opened his fingers, releasing even more blood from the wound around the glass, and smiled. And started to cry as well. Just one last time.

**;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;**

_So long seeking out my destination, I forgot what was supposed to be there when I arrived._

Zack swallowed, glancing back guiltily at the door behind him. The door that he hadn't even tried to knock on before twisting the handle and finding it open, the door he hadn't even stopped at for a second of consideration before going through. It was closed now again, sealed behind to encase him in this amazing tiled hallway that would no doubt shine like ivory in the presence of light.

Now though, he wasn't sorry for the lack of such a thing as he stood in an almost crouch in its dark shadows, his sword braced readily at his side. He listened and watched for an enemy he was sure didn't really exist, and a prize he had even less of a clue about.

"Okay," he dared to whisper, licking his chapped bottom lip straight after, "flower girl. Anymore information would be really appreciated right now."

But no response came, not even the cold rush he often experienced around the cloth tied to his bicep. She wasn't here with him.

And, he had to wonder; standing in the middle of a strangers home like a common cat burglar, waiting to hear back from a voice in his head, if Reno's verdict on his mental state hadn't been shamefully accurate.

He shook his head, at a lot of things, and then, with another wary scope around himself and a short listen out to ensure nothing was going to sneak up on him, the Shinra recruit began to pad softly across the hallway. Wishing the ground weren't so hard and his boots so heavy, he approached a big white door with an ornamental door handle and panels, and very carefully reached out to grasp the hard silver.

It slid down easily, barely making a sound which he was so grateful for, and keeping a firm grasp on his tongue with his teeth the boy pushed the whole thing forward to reveal... another hallway.

He frowned, looking out into an area almost identical to the one he was already in, aside from the presence of a huge spiral staircase twisting towards and above the ceiling, and a grand looking series of bookshelves aligning the left wall. The wood was thick and very black in the darkness, a contrast to the so far glacial colouring of this home. Golden rune like metalwork shimmered minutely along the line of each shelf, bringing out the similarly coloured threading of the volumes themselves. It sort of reminded him of the old school library, tall and wide, boring, looking in every way suited to a home like this, but still strangely... odd.

He was so distracted by his study of this enigmatic piece of furniture in fact, that he lost sight of himself for a minute, and by the time awareness sunk in again it was too late to stop the door, which he had released behind him in favour of taking a few small steps forward, from slamming back into place.

He jumped almost a foot in the air then, as the shout of its impact roared out, and then echoed for several seconds afterwards. Heart pounding against his ribs and teeth gritted to the point of shattering, he crouched low and waited, morbidly curious to see what he'd awoken.

Nothing.

Nothing came for the length of time he waited, no monster barging through any of the doors across from him, no startled people racing down the stairs with bats or materia at the ready. Such a racket would have spurred either action, and he wasn't sure the fact that it hadn't was in anyway a good sign.

Better the Ifrit you know...

But now he no longer felt the need for so much caution as he continued searching around the house.

A kitchen he found, a living room, a conservatory and bathrooms. All grand and apparelled as he'd expected, the finest material put into their components to create that honed atmosphere of wealth and the pristine. But no people, not even pictures of them. No random items scattered around to give him any indication of what type of people lived here, or how many there were.

But it was in the second living room, the last of the places he was to check downstairs, that he found something. A desk pushed up to the windows, with some sheets scattered haphazardly across the top.

Shinra reports. Official documentation from very high up in the company, dealing with weapon manufacturing, important missions and other subjects he had no patience to explore.

He stopped there in frustrated consideration, wondering if this was what he was meant to find here. Was there some information here that he had to know?

The thought, for a reason he couldn't explain, was unbearably disappointing and he found himself refusing to entertain it for long. He picked up one of the sheets and squinted at it in the lack of light. There were a lot of numbers typed out, and a list of names, some of which he recognized but most he didn't. What caught his eye very shortly, however, was the content at the end of the report. A line reading 'for the approval of' and a space beneath, in which a drawling signature had been scribed in shiny ink.

_G. Sephiroth_

He frowned, letting the page down and picking up another.

_G. Sephiroth_

All of them, and more in the drawers of the desks. There he found envelopes as well, addressed to and signed by the same moniker. Every last one of them.

It hit him very quickly then, along with a cooling wash of disbelief. Sephiroth had moved out to Modoeheim months before. He'd moved here, right _here_. This was General Sephiroth's home. He hadn't just broken into _someone's _house.

He'd broken into _Sephiroth's_ house.

"I didn't break in," he mumbled to himself, but that didn't really make much difference to the current predicament. If the man came home- and he had to assume he wasn't home because there was no way he wouldn't have heard him in all this time- then he'd seriously be in for it.

"Shit!"

He rested back against the desk, feeling suddenly weak and at a loss.

And he was sure, bitterly, devastatingly sure now, that this had all been in his head all along. This address. Angeal must have mentioned it to him before, and his own mind had created some sort of delusion around it, mixing up dreams with reality, putting non-existent voices in his ears.

"Gaia," he let the sword slip back into the sheath at his hip before bringing his hands up to grasp at his head, where a migraine was starting to thrum behind his eyes now that all the adrenaline was finally slipping away. He felt sick, confused, afraid and so, so disappointed. Let down by his own sanity.

He shook his head. What was he going to do? This... this wasn't normal. It wasn't normal to do things like this.

Gaia, had he actually done this? Made his friend fly all the way over here in a stolen copter? Broken into the General of the Shinra army's house? Went rummaging through his personal effects? It was crazy. It was the actions of an insane person. He was losing his mind.

He stood up straight again and pushed himself away from the desk, turning to regard the papers cluttered over it. He couldn't remember if they'd looked that messy when he first came in, or if he'd made it worse. Should he tidy them a bit, or would that just draw more attention to the fact that someone had been tampering with them.

He scoffed at himself, bringing his eyes up to the ceiling in scorn. There's no way Sephiroth wouldn't know that someone had been here. His senses; his sense of smell, his spatial awareness, were enhanced to mortal perfection. He'd be able to tell if an insect had crawled across the page.

His only hope was to get out of here fast and pray that Sephiroth would have no way of knowing who exactly had been his intruder. Gaia, if he did and Angeal was told... that would be the end.

So without touching anything else, the boy hurried away from the table and out the door of the room, shutting it softly behind him, his paranoia with sound having returned now that he knew who could be listening.

The hallway was deathly silent, like a theatre emptied for the night, its seats unfilled and the stage an empty dark gap in the wall. The boy swallowed thickly and started to cross the smooth span of the liquid tiles, forcing his steps to be as light and unimposing as they could.

But as he was doing this his ears, becoming more clear as the pressure of activity died away, quickly adjusted to the silence and were able, obviously aided by the increasing supply of Mako in his system, to make out the components of it. The soft whooshing of the wind against the upper-windows, the mechanical hum of the unified electronics of a modern home, and the trickling of water.

He stopped.

He strained his ears; much like a Cuahl might when faced with prey within the vicinity, and listened out for it with more focus. His eardrums sucked it in, the definite sound of water spilling. But not trickling as he'd first assumed, from a tap or machine somewhere in one of the rooms, but falling hard in a steady torrent. Like a shower.

His eyebrows drew together and he turned once on the spot, looking all around himself in confusion as he tried to gauge which direction it was coming from. He was even more confused when after a short while it became clear that it wasn't coming from either the direction of the stairs, or the kitchen or out behind him, but from the left. Where those great odd bookshelves were aligned against the wall.

He frowned over at it, trying to decide whether what he was hearing was just the workings of the homes plumbing. But he didn't think it was. It sounded strange, like a waterfall far in the distance. But coming from behind that wall.

Feeling a shiver run through him, the boy took a few steps over, stopping short of being able to reach out and brush his fingers against the cloth-like spines of an alignment of deep red hard copies. Now closer, the sound was even more vivid to his strengthening ears, a sure steady flow of water crashing against a hard ground. Nothing else though, just that.

He walked down until he was at the end of the shelves and could see the wall behind them, and then carefully moved forward until the side of his face was pressed against it. He jumped away first, his cheekbone flaring up at the shock of the cold, but then braced himself and did it again. With his ear pressed up to the tiles and his palms spread out beside him, he closed his eyes to listen.

_Dududududududududududududududududududududuudududuu dududududuududududu_

He pulled back, heartbeat starting to increase again in a frustrated need for activity.

"I don't understand..."

The sound was coming from behind the wall. Somewhere down below. But there was nothing there. There shouldn't have been anything there but stone and insulation.

He didn't understand. What was it?

"Flower girl," he huffed, looking around himself in exasperation. And when he threw his head back and glared up at the ceiling he almost knocked himself over with confusion at the dozens of white eyes he found staring back at him.

Through the thick fog of returning vertigo it took him almost a full minute before his mind was able to grasp the fact that the things he was looking at were not in fact real living beings staring down at him, but all part of a huge ceiling fresco spreading across the whole of the upper surface.

The moonlight shone in through the arched windows at either side of it, illuminating the design of the thing better than anything else in the room. He dragged his eyes across it, finding all those weird little winged babies that seemed to be an essential part of this kind of art, clouds that looked grey, being used as seats by a mess of naked bodies that were so jumbled together they looked like one big plain of skin and hair. But there was one that was apart from them, sitting away on a rounded seat with a harp covering the most essential parts of her anatomy. Mostly.

As he looked over her he found himself unable to pull his eyes away, not as he scoped out the curves of her white skin, not as the crimson spilling out from her scalp slowly grew darker until it looked a deep rich brown, and the eyes turned from stony white and grey to vivid, beautiful green.

They stared at him and he stared back, and then flickered, just for a fraction of a moment that was so short it had never existed at all, to the left.

It released him then and he almost fell with the freedom of it, balling his hands at his sides and bending his knees. He glanced back up one last time, but found only a frozen scene of artsy appeal and nothing more, so he looked instead to the bookshelf and the mystery of it.

"What are you hiding?" He walked back along it, dragging his fingers over the bumps of the hardcovers and soft backs, over the slick line of the shelves themselves, solid and firm. And then, when he reached the edge of the first and the start of the second he pulled, digging his fingers into the space between the two and pulling back as hard as he could. It took a while, whatever strength he had acquired in his months at Shinra being already nearly depleted by the journey here, but eventually the whole piece of furniture moved back enough for him to see what was behind.

Nothing. Just the wall.

He moved on to the next.

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The butt thudded down to the ground with a hiss, the tip of his boot following after to smash it down under the level of the surface.

Reno growled and slunk back into his seat, slamming the door after him and then giving it a kick just for good measure. He nestled back against the headrest and scraped his hands over his biceps in an aggressive attempt to circulate warmth back into them. He had no radiator to aid him in the fight, not wanting to risk shutting on the engine and attracting any more attention to himself, but by Gaia if Zack didn't come back soon...

No, if Zack didn't come back soon his manic ass would have to find another way out of this shit hole. He wasn't gonna freeze to death here for nothing.

It was coming up to the second hour already since the boy had departed, not that there'd been any change in his surroundings to indicate that passing of time. The sky above was sill as thick and grey as when he'd flown down from it, the moonlight turning it all silver at the edges. Silver linings...

The forest around him was a black, dead thing. Gulping in death and giving nothing back. They should just cut it all down. What the fuck good are trees for? And that way he'd be able to see twenty yards around himself.

He licked his bottom lip, shaking his head and turning to look out the far window at the copter waiting along beside his, yet another static presence of his current predicament. It'd been two hours now and no one had come back to it. He figured it was a long running mission keeping them away and they'd be back at any time, or they'd already croaked it and a clean-up team would be on the way to the site soon. Either way he wanted to be gone before anyone showed up. Or else his ass was carnage.

_The Shinra brat'll get a kick out of that _he mused to himself, shivering at the remembrance of those icy eyes following him around the training hall.

"Come on Fair..." he nestled back into a more comfortable position and then closed his eyes, letting his head fall back so his chin jutted up. He thought mournfully of his bed at the apartment, the bed he hadn't got to enjoy in what was coming up to four days now, and grief turned to agitation.

He thought of Zack then, and holding one of those fancy fucking rod things Vled had shown him against his nuts.

Agitation turned to a sort of expectative contentment. He closed his eyes.

But he shouldn't have let himself relax like that. Not after almost four days without a proper recharging. He had nothing in his system to stop him from falling all the way under, loosing awareness as his mind slipped to the brink of delirium.

Only to be brought back, unprepared and vulnerable with lethargy, by the sound of the door hinges pulling back, and a numbing burst of air sweeping over his body, going straight to the bones and throwing him into alertness like an unprepared bird into flight.

He slammed up, eyes wide and hand's flailing for something to steady himself. He caught onto the front rest and then after a second to catch his breath, turned to fully face the person currently moving around the door and then leaning forward to look in at him.

Their face came into view, and he stared back through the little chocobos flying around his head.

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Zack stepped back for a second, wanting to take the whole thing in at once.

He sighed, his irises' bobbing around his eyes and head starting to jerk up and down in slow, languid pulls.

This was it.

As it turned out, there were six bookcases altogether, separate pieces put up against one another to portray the illusion that they were all one long series of shelves and cabinets. But Zack had exposed the reality of it, by pulling each part away from the wall he'd revealed where they divided into individual, less impressive entities. And now, three at the right, and two at the left, jutting out untidily from the wall like ajar domino squares, the point of it all was clear.

It was the middle one, closer to the left, that couldn't be pulled back like its siblings, couldn't be pushed right or left even an inch or shaken out of place. Because this one wasn't just lined up against the wall, it was built _into_ it. A part of it, but not it.

A doorway.

He took another step back, his bottom lip being pulled into elasticity by his teeth as he considered what to do next. The sound of the water could be felt more assuredly now, probably because the walls drowning it out had lost some of their insulation, and for some reason it spurred him into anxiousness as he tried to decide the best way to get this thing open and see what on Gaia was behind it.

He'd tried pushing it, tried looking for a keyhole, tried pushing it some more, then pulling it. And finally giving it a strong kick to the side, just because. None of it had worked. And now he was at a loss.

He shook his head, looking out behind himself and blowing some air upwards through his lips as he considered the possibility of Sephiroth appearing any second and finding out what he'd done to his home.

What_ had_ he done to his home? This was General Sephiroth's home. His uncle's best friend. The General of the army he was currently enrolled in. What the hell was he doing here?

"Flower girl, if you could offer any advice here I'd be grateful. Seriously," he huffed, balling his hands into fists and pressing them into his hips.

But the knuckles of his right hand didn't meet what he'd expected when he did so, and it took him a moment to realize what the hard lump pressing into his hand was, and what it was holding.

"Reno..." he lifted the hem of his sweater to glance down at the black leather pouch hanging against his pelvic bone, it shape lumpy and pregnant.

He took in a breath, heart speeding up with ill-advised excitement as he reached down to loosen the tie of the bag to expose the sight of the colourful spheres resting within like a woumbful of precious eggs.

Fingers reaching in to feel across their smooth curves, he looked at the bookshelf and bit his lip.

...

The explosion came louder and more forceful than he'd expected, a rush of hot air rippling out through the hall and pushing back the door he was hiding behind, forcing him to brace his arms against the wood and push forward to prevent himself from being thrown across the room.

"Shit," he waited about a minute, until he was sure no tremors remained running through the wood he was braced against, and when he thought it was safe to do so, safe enough anyway, he cracked the door opened again and peered out through the gap.

At first all there was was smoke, thick and grey and swirling in heavy clumps around the space. But eventually it started to move upwards, thinning itself out in the stretch so it was soon translucent enough to expose the crux of its source.

He wasn't sure what to expect. They'd thought him something about the use of combined elemental materia in Shinra, about their properties and how they could be combined. Fire and Thundara, together would create an explosion that would vary depending on the amount or the level of the magic used, capable even of taking down a whole building under the right circumstances.

He didn't want that of course. The materia Reno had given him were only level ones, and he tucked them deep into the shelf, holding them in with the books to try and contain the brunt of the blow, so he'd hoped that they'd do the job he wanted and nothing more.

But he was inexperienced in magic, so for all he knew the setup he'd created could have been enough to tear down the entire hall. The house even. He didn't know.

Obviously, thankfully, neither of the former disasters had occurred. The walls around the room were still in place, and aside from the pollution of the smoke and the scattered clumps of debris thrown around the floor, it didn't seem too damaged.

But his heart did give a long leap into his throat, and cold regret swept through him, when he was finally able to see, when the smoke and darkness had cleared enough to allow it, the sheer size of the hole that had been created.

"Shit!" He repeated, stepping out reluctantly to better examine it. Gaia, it looked massive from every angle. The bookshelf was completely blown to pieces at either side of it, and wood and paper scattered in a dizzy mess in front and all around the place.

It was wider than it was tall, spanning about a meter out at either side of him when he finally stood in front of it, but about half that above his head.

With wide eyes he moved his focus away from the hole itself, to look through it. More darkness there, thick and heavier than that on his side and not allowing him to see down through it very well. So he moved forward, chunks of wood and plaster cracking under his feet as he clutched his hands at either side of the wall and leaned his head in through.

It must have been a sort of basement. The ceiling slanted low ahead of him, following down the line of a set of stairs to lead to a lower level.

He shook his head, not believing there actually were stairs in front of him. He realized that he really hadn't been expecting anything to be there but more plaster casting or maybe a way outside.

He looked behind himself at the wreckage he'd created, scratching the back of his head.

"Coulda thought a bit more before setting off an explosion in General Sephiroth's house then," he huffed sheepishly, sniffing quickly and shaking his head before ducking it back in again and trying to see down into whatever rested at the bottom of the stairs. There was a light coming from somewhere down there, lighting up the space below so he could make out what looked to be a carpeted floor, and when he bent down further, some furniture belonging to any normal bedroom, a bed, a wardrobe, even what looked like a television.

He shook his head. Any normal bedroom? No, not normal, hidden like this... what did it mean?

Waiting no longer to try and guess, he passed through the hole and made his way down the stairs, finding them narrow and wooden but not soft or creaking with age as he would have thought. The carpet at the bottom was soft and padded under his boots, and as he looked around he found nothing old or dingy or abandoned, but a clean room, a used room. The sheets thrown across the bed even looked newly tossed.

He didn't go over to examine them though. Didn't take any longer to study the television pushed up against the wall, the treadmill at the other side, the bedside locker with its bottle of water and plate resting on top.

He moved on, past the plain of padded fibres in the direction of where both light and sound were seemingly being made. The water was clear now, its sound so familiar that before he'd even reached this new door and pushed it the rest of the way open, he knew what to expect.

But he'd been wrong. So, so very wrong.

There was no way-

His knees sagged under him, his insides giving such a lurch that vomit and bile came clear up his throat, passing his tonsils before he gathered the will to swallow it back down.

He swayed against the door frame, hands grasping it tight as everything in front of him started to blur and distort like images in rippling water, everything losing their sense and structure to madness. All began to flash in white and black, and a sharp pain shot so quickly through his head that this time his body had no resources left to stop what had once again come up his throat.

The mess splashed onto the ground, and he followed it. Slamming down onto his knees and hissing and retching the rest of it forward, coughing and gulping for air after it was done.

His eyes, wide and shaking madly in their sockets, strained forward again. Through the glass as it was pounded on and on by gushes of steaming liquid, down at the legs. Pale, small legs stretching out through the doorway onto the tiles.

He followed the line of them, leading up to the rest of the blurry body hidden by the transparent division. A small, thin body the same colour as all the gleaming white around it, the skin only a pathetic shade darker than the porcelain and tiles.

He'd always looked like that. Too flawless to properly fit anywhere.

The only colours that could be found now, the only colours in his world for the months that had passed between them, were the two that told him he'd finally found what she'd been leading him to.

Yellow, as pale and vivid as the sun. The colour he'd claimed as the bane of his existence for all the years he'd known him.

_It's too girly._

And the red, disappearing and re-emerging at the same pace as the water fall, seeping out from that whiteness before swirling quickly down out of sight. The reason he'd been led here now. The reason she, somewhere in the back of his mind, was still telling him to hurry.

He lunged forward.

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He felt the hands around his face before anything else, soft and hot as they took hold of him and stroked over skin that he thought could feel no more.

The rest had gone, the rain that had been falling over him in hot and cold gushes had dried up now, so that all he could feel was the warmth of those fingers. Even her voice was not there anymore, that soft whispered weeping that he'd thought he'd been moving closer to, receding back until he was without it again.

He didn't miss it. He only revelled in these touches, knowing now that he'd finally chased Elysium down and was within its protection, that the memory of all things bad had to be taken away soon.

He didn't know how long this bliss sustained, he had no wish now to keep the time of it, only for it to go on and on until he as an individual entity was lost to it.

But its end did come of course, with the thrumming of something else through him, something still pleasurable and warm, but more intense and vivid. Enough so, to pull the paleness back. To reintroduce the feeling of mortality, the hardness of the tiles under him, the coolness of wet clothing drying in static air.

He feared, grieved terribly for a long few moments then as he slowly returned to himself, that he'd been taken away from it. That something had pulled him back.

That fear, however, proved to be a vain one. Because it soon became more clear than ever that he'd found his escape, that he'd reached higher into the light than he'd dared to hope. The life-stream personified itself in the shimmer of those bright eyes, the curve of his bowed mouth turned in a frown. His hair, as vivid and absolute as ink, was so strong and sure as a visual presence, that it pushed the last remnants of white out of the fray.

Still though things were blurry, his new eyes had not adjusted fully to the light yet. But he looked and listened to the preview of it, that mouth moving and that familiar voice flowing out.

"Cloud,"

More rain fell again, but only two drops, and they felt as comforting and warm to him as everything else did now. He closed his eyes to enjoy it all, and again it was that intense sensation of something like magic going through him that brought him back.

He looked just in time to see the green dissipating back below his line of vision, matching exactly the loss of the feeling from his body.

He could make out a bit more surely now the lines and forms of his heaven, almost a full face, but still things were liquid and fleeting. Mostly colours still, the blue and black and fleshy beige of his saviour.

And he wondered why, in delirium that soon turned to terror, floating off somewhere behind, the silver and green of hell was there now too.

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**Well, that was a lot of movement! I hope it didn't seem too rushed. Everything that's been building up for a while just sort of happened at once here, but it wrote itself very easily actually.**

**As I'm approaching the end of the story, I'm really enjoying the reviews on everything as a whole, so I hope you take the time to comment if you enjoyed or have anything to say about this chapter. Even if it's critical, I want to hear it.**

**See you for the final. Slán go fóill!**


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